you're always on my mind... you're always in my head... and I can't live....I can't live another day without you!
A Minute Without You Part I
Racia and Inch have been friends since they were high school kids. Inch has been open about her sexuality to Racia. Racia had seen Inch try to become straight and see her stumble back to a lesbian again. Racia hadn't mind that Inch was close to her, she didn't care what other people say or think, she and Inch are close friends, no more, no less.
Inch on the other hand has been madly in love with Racia for over a year now! She had contemplated more than a couple of times to tell Racia but she figured that their friendship is too precious too lose. Even if it meant that she would have to suffer by hiding her true feelings.
When their college life started, a lot of things have changed. Inch had to adjust with Racia's hectic schedule and try to take a back seat. Racia on the other hand, felt that Inch was slowly giving her the cold shoulder. Both had to admit that they felt the gap that was slowly coming in between them. The two haven't had a descent conversation for a few months and Inch felt the end coming.
Inch called a few friends and tried to seek their advice. Surprisingly, she wasn't alone regarding Racia. A friend told Inch that Racia changed and that Racia was taking her for granted.
Inch didn't know what to do and finally told Racia about what she thought was happening between them. Inch, with all the emotion she was feeling was able to control her tears while talking to Racia. Inch felt that Racia wasn't as affected about the situation as she was. Although Racia did "change" back to her old self.
Things ran smoothly after their talk. Their communication was restored, and the gap was slowly beginning to be bridged. Inch was so happy that during the summer vacation, she and Racia were once again together almost everyday. Both wanted to lose a couple of pounds and went to the gym to workout. Their workout was cut short though when Racia's dog gave birth. Racia had to stay home to watch over her dog and her pups.
Still determined to lose weight, Racia asked Inch to come over their house so Inch could teach her how to play basketball at the village basketball court.
"Thanks for coming. I could really use a work-out.", Racia said.
"It's nothing. Come on, I'll show you how to dribble the ball.", Inch replied.
"I'm not interested in dribbling, just teach me how to shoot."
Inch shot a couple of jump shots to demonstrate how it should be done. It was now Racia's turn to shoot the ball. Her shot, more than a few times ended up short, so Inch had to position Racia's arms and knees properly. Racia's shot was now able to reach the ring but it didn't have a follow through.
"Now all you need is a follow through. Just flick your wrists as you throw the ball. The form of your throw should be caused by the fingers and not the palm. The force of your throw should come from your knees and not you arms.", explained Inch.
"I don't know what you're talking about Inch. Just show me.", Racia asked.
Inch showed Racia the movements but she still couldn't get it. So this time Inch stood behind Racia, placed her hand over Racia's and placed them to the side of the ball. She gently pulled Racia's hands downwards and then pushed them upwards again. They continued this motion until Inch thought that Racia got the idea of the follow through.
"Now, let's see you shoot.", Inch commanded.
Racia shot the ball and it went in.
"Nice shot! Now just continue practicing,", Inch said.
After a few shots here and there, Racia grew tired and sat beside Inch. Inch was observing Racia and thought how lucky she is to be spending a lot of time with Racia. A lot of guys and girls would die just to spend half the time they were spending together.
"Hey! Can I hold your hand?", asked Racia.
"Why?", Inch answered back..
"Your hand felt real soft when you showed me the follow through. It's so soft. It seems that you're hand isn't the typical hand of an athlete."
"Yeah well...it's just stored fats. So now that you know how to shoot, what do you want to do next?"
"I don't know. I know, you've been watching me play for a while now, why don't you start playing and I'll start watching."
Inch started to play and shot some hoops. Racia noticed that Inch paid more attention to shooting three's and dribbling. Once in a while, Inch would try different moves driving in. Racia thought that Inch was quite good with the three point territory. She wondered why their high school coach didn't notice it.
"I think I had enough exercise for the day.", Inch said as she tried to catch her breath.
"Yeah, what do you say we go back to our house and freshen up?", Racia said as she stood up.
While walking, Inch reviewed what happened that day and felt thankful for spending another day with Racia. She was surprised when Racia wiped the sweat off of her face.
"You're dripping wet!", Racia smiled.
Racia, on the other hand thought about how her friendship with Inch was and is making a lot of eyebrows rise. A lot of people think that they are lovers or at least have a mutual understanding. They didn't. Racia wasn't into girl-to-girl relationships, although she thinks that if a girl was into that kind of a relationship, she would be crazy if she turned down Inch.
Inch is kind, understanding, thoughtful, caring and gentle. She treats others with respect. Racia is almost sure that Inch would give everything she could, to the girl she loves.
Racia and Inch took advantage of the summer vacation and spent most of their time together. Inch however, doesn't know if she would like the school to start or the vacation to continue. She had met a pretty girl,
Floremi, in school and would like to know her better. Inch have already introduced her to Racia and Racia said that she's cute. She could be the one Inch had been looking for to let her forget Racia.
School started anyway and Inch found out that she and Floremi would be classmates. Inch also have her friends as her classmates, but Floremi was all alone. To Inch's delight, she and Floremi might be always together due to the fact that the class they were in, was full of people they don't know.
As Inch had predicted, she and Floremi had gotten closer. They sat together during classes, they hang out together after school and they call each other on the phone. Inch decided to tell Floremi that she was a lesbian. At first, Floremi thought that Inch was just kidding. Then realizing that Inch was dead serious, she told Inch that it was okay.
"It wasn't really a shock though, I mean, the way you dress...it's quite obvious but then I didn't really know.", Floremi said.
"Yeah, I guess I was sort of weird when it came to clothes.", Inch replied.
"Not really, I think you're cool. Sometimes, I find you really cute, like when you wear those baggy jeans and large shirts."
"Really? I thought I was cute all the time!"
"What I mean is, you're cuter when you wear them. It's like, everyday, yeah you're wearing your usual clothes, you're cute....then one day you're wearing the baggy jeans and large shirts, but then, you seem to be cuter than usual. Sometimes I catch some lesbians looking at you like, telling themselves that they should wear clothes like that to impress some girls or something."
"You mean some girl is actually impressed by me? That girl must be blind."
"Hey! I am that girl!"
"You? Come on...."
"Believe what you want to believe."
Inch couldn't really believe that Floremi wasn't affected by the fact that she was a lesbian, and the fact that she had impressed Floremi, was even more unbelievable. After telling her about her sexuality, Inch started to flirt with her, not that Inch haven't done that before, it was just this time, it has gotten a little bit physical.
Inch started to hold Floremi's hands longer, put her arms around Floremi, hug her more than usual and the likes. Floremi didn't seem to mind, sometimes, Inch could feel that she flirted back.
Inch felt that it was time for her to tell Floremi that she love her.
"Flo, I have something important to tell you.", Inch started.
"What is it?", asked Floremi.
"I love you, not just as a friend, but more than that. I am actually falling in love with you. I am not asking you to reciprocate the feeling, I just want you to know how much you mean to me."
"Inch, you have put me in a tougher spot than you think. I felt that you were sort of flirting with me. I think you also felt that I flirted back. I am feeling something for you too Inch, but I'm not really sure what it is. I like flirting with you, but I think I just have to think this over."
"It's okay Flo, I'm not pushing you to like me."
"I do like you Inch, I like you a lot. It's just that I don't know if I'm ready for this kind of a relationship. What I know is, I like being with you, I enjoy your company, I like being with you. I also know that I also have feelings for you Inch. Let's just have a mutual understanding for now. Is that okay?"
"It's more than I have hoped for."
"Okay. Let's put it this way. We both can go out with other people, provided we tell it to each other."
"It's fine with me."
"I really hope that you can wait until I can make up my mind."
"I will...I promise."
Inch and Floremi have gotten off on the right track. They have dated a couple of times and they both always have lots of fun and a ton of flirting around.
Floremi goes wherever Inch goes, that includes Racia's parties. Racia knew that Floremi and Inch have a mutual understanding, she was happy for Inch. Inch deserve to be happy. Racia started hanging out with Inch and Floremi. She and Floremi have become friends because of Inch.
"So Floremi, have you ever kissed Inch?", Racia asked one time.
"Nah! We're wholesome kind of people.", Floremi replied as she hugged Inch.
Racia could tell that Floremi is very much in love with Inch, she just haven't realize it yet and it was just a matter of time.
One day, Inch and Floremi was watching a scary movie. When a scary part played, Floremi hugged Inch, catching her off guard. The half-empty, big sized cola can that Inch was holding spilled on both their laps. They dried themselves off with their handkerchiefs, then Floremi noticed that Inch had some drops of cola near her mouth. It was dark so she had to look closer to find the exact location of the drops. She put her hand behind Inch's neck and pulled her closer. When Floremi finished wiping Inch's face, she glanced at Inch and saw that Inch was looking at her.
"What are you looking at?", asked Floremi.
"You're beautiful face. I was just thinking how wonderful your hand feels on my face.", Inch explained.
"Well, how would this feel like?"
Floremi grabbed Inch's neck and pulled her forward and kissed her on the lips!
"How did that feel?", asked Floremi.
"It feels wonderful.", Inch replied.
This time, Inch initiated the kiss. It was longer than the first one and gentler.
"I guess you know what this means, huh?", asked Floremi as she ran her fingers into Inch's hair.
"What?", Inch asked back .
"I am falling in love with you Inch. I don't care what others would say. I love you and that's all there is to it."
Inch and Racia are now officially lovers. They decided to keep their relationship hidden, except to some people. They agreed that they can only tell close friends. Of course Inch told Racia. Racia was very happy to hear the news, although she realized that it would mean that Inch would now be spending most of her time with Floremi.
Inch and Floremi's relationship was smooth as a silk. Racia took a back seat to Floremi. Then again, Racia had gotten close with Floremi.
One day, Racia was supposed to meet somebody at a mall when she came across Floremi. Both decided to stroll together until Racia's friend arrives. Both really didn't have anything in common, except knowing Inch. Expectedly, they talked mostly about Inch, how Inch gets angry, how she cries, and how she lives her life.
"Inch really do care about you Racia. Most of the time, like 60% of the time, we talk about you.", Floremi informed Racia.
"Really? And what does she tell you about me?", Racia raised her eyebrow.
"She said that you're the greatest friend she had ever had. She likes you a lot that sometimes it makes me jealous! No just kidding! But sometimes I also wonder why she didn't come on you. She does like you a lot."
"Well, Inch knows that our friendship is special, and we both think that it would just be destroyed by things like that."
"I was straight before I knew Inch. I didn't expect that I'll actually fall for a girl. But Inch is different I really don't know what is it in her that charmed me."
Racia thought about what Floremi told her at the mall. She tried to sleep but all she could do is toss and turn. She asked herself the same thing Floremi asked her. Why didn't Inch come on to her?
"It's not that I wanted Inch to come on to me, I'm just wondering why she didn't. Do you get me?", Racia asked Katie.
Katie is a close friend of both and she just wanted to ask Katie's opinion.
"Maybe Inch just didn't like to ruin the friendship or maybe she just isn't attracted to you. It's as simple as that.", Katie replied.
"I guess so, I don't know Katie, why am I being bothered by that fact?", Racia again asked.
"I don't know, but maybe you should reflect, I mean meditate."
"I don't know ."
"Okay, let me ask you a few questions, answer them truthfully or else, you won't realize anything."
"It's okay with me. Ask away."
"Let me see, how long have you and Inch been friends?"
"Uhmm... more than 3 years."
"And in those 3 years, has Inch ever had a crush on you, show signs of such things or ever admitted about it?"
"Well, she did have a crush on me about 2 years ago, but she forgot about it already. She just sort of used me to forget somebody else."
"So, did you ever felt sorry that she wasn't really purely attracted to you? That she just used you to forget another girl?"
"Let me think about it. Uhmmmm, now that you mention it, sort of. I felt like I wasn't good enough for her."
"So now, do you think that Inch is paying way too much attention to Floremi?"
"Not really, that's supposed to be what lovers do, pay a lot of attention to the each other."
"Did Inch ever give you such attention before?"
"Just a little bit. I mean we were close but not that close with each other."
"So now, Racia, you could trust me you know. Please answer this question honestly. Why are you bothered by the fact that Inch didn't come on to you?"
"I'll have to pass at that one. I'll answer it when I figure it out. Thanks for your help. I promise I'll tell you the reason if I figure it out."
Racia thought about Inch. Why did all of a sudden she felt she was being neglected by Inch? Is she actually jealous?