A NEW JOURNEY 30
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Sunday, the first of August, I woke about nine and saw the whites of PJ's blue eyes. He turned and kissed me. "You didn't sleep very well last night, did ya?" PJ asked, next to me.
"Boy, I sure didn't. I don't know why but what Janie told us about Clint has really shaken me to my core. I'm so lucky to have come out when I was 20 and didn't have to deal with the agony of high school bullies and the other shit," I replied.
"Everyone handles it differently. It is sad to think Clint thought the best solution was suicide to the point where he had pills..."
"Frightening. I don't know if I was a parent how I'd handle such a revelation like that. PJ, did suicide ever cross your mind?" I asked and pulled him close to me.
"Jason, I was so fucked up that it didn't. We're lucky to have come along when we did though. Look on the bright side of things and see what a transformation is occurring before our eyes. I'm sure it's rather unusual for a quick turn around like we've seen, but it showed how much Clint wanted to be liked and not judged. In a small part it reflects what has happened to me since I've met you."
"Maybe we should delay our trip say a month or so just in case we're needed here," I said.
"We could do that, but it could happen then as well. We've seen how quick he is to make friends and adjust. Let's see what happened last night before we make any judgments. We can't be here all the time just in case. We'll just be a phone call away and a few hours away if something bad happens."
"You're right," I said. "Why, oh why have I become so attached to Clint? Hell, you'd think he was my boyfriend or some shit like that."
"He's touched us deep inside in a lot of ways so it's natural to get attached somewhat. I know I have too," PJ replied.
We lay together in bed until it was time to get up. We showered and put on shorts before we ate something. We sat on the couch and put on a movie, which did remind me Wes would be home soon. I told PJ my plans to leave earlier than usual unless something came up. He knew my new working hours and my desire to see Wes as well.
We heard a knock at the door and yelled it was open. Clint came in the door in his board shorts and baggy tee.
"What's up, dudes?" Clint asked.
"Not much," I replied. "How'd last night go?"
"It was fun again, but I got reprimanded for my foul mouth," Clint replied and laughed. "I can't stay long today. I'm heading over to Bailey's house to swim with him and some of the other guys."
"That's awesome," PJ said.
"Who is Bailey?" I asked.
"The dude that keeps texting me," Clint replied. "Hey, I need some advice from you gay guys."
"Fire away," PJ said.
"I'm really starting to like Trey and want to ask him out, but I know Bailey likes me too so I don't wanna break his heart," Clint said.
"Bailey may be the easiest to answer," I said. "Just tell him you want to be friends and nothing more. Tell him too that you want to date someone your age since you're starting college," I said.
"Makes sense," Clint said. "Any suggestions on how to ask Trey out?"
"First off, do you think he'd go out with you?" PJ asked.
"I think so. He was flirting with me big time last night," Clint replied.
"You could start then by asking if he wanted to do something like going eat or to the movies. Surely, he'll know you're asking him out for a date then," PJ said.
"It's that easy, huh?" Clint asked.
"It is," I replied. "Or maybe today tell him you like him and see if he wants to date."
"Jason, I think my way is better. I'm sure it'd be easier that way," PJ said.
"You're right," I said. "I was just thinking of a way he could know without being rejected. See how things go today and follow your heart."
"I will. Oh, by the way, next weekend Bailey's having a sixteenth birthday party at his house so I won't miss you guys too much," Clint stated. "The problem with that is now I have to think of a gift. Hell, I barely know him."
"Get him a gift card," PJ said.
"Wow, you guys are so smart," Clint said. "Hey, I better jet. Catch you on the other side."
Once Clint was gone, PJ put his arm around me. "I think our little problem was just solved."
I smiled back, "You took the words right out my mouth. Did you see the sparkle in his eyes?"
"Ummmm... now that you mention it, I did. It makes me feel good all over knowing we are possibly helping someone," PJ said. "It is about time I returned that favor to someone else."
"It does make me feel great," I said.
I stayed and hung out with PJ. We cleaned his pool and pool area though it wasn't too dirty. We needed an excuse to be outdoors. My time was short lived with my desire to see and spend a little time with my roomie who I hadn't seen in what seemed like forever.
Once back at the apartment, I lay on the couch and decided to watch some TV while waiting on Wes. Before I knew it, my eyes were closed. The next sound I heard was the front door opening. My eyes popped open to see Wes coming in the door with a bag.
I sat up on the couch. "Hey, how was your trip?"
"Great," he replied. "I'll credit you for being exactly right. It was great for us to get away without anyone else around. Jason, did you know that was my first trip alone with a girl?"
"No, I didn't realize that," I replied.
"It was," Wes said and sat next to me. "I do know I am a fucking straight guy."
"I didn't have any doubts about that. Were you questioning that?"
Wes slapped my leg, "No dumbass. I was trying to put it nicely what we mostly did."
"OOO, I get it now. Besides that, did you enjoy being with her?"
"I really did. We had a great time together, even though I wish it could have been a little... no, I'd have been worn out if it had been much longer," Wes laughed. "Jason, I did discover one thing."
"What's that?"
"I am just not to the point where I'm ready to live with her just yet. Damn, I didn't realize just how long it takes a girl to get dressed," Wes replied. "It'd be a huge adjustment for me. I sort of see where you're coming from when you say you don't wanna live with PJ yet. I think in time it will happen but not yet."
"I know where you're coming from. I spent the weekend with PJ and was ready to come back here. We love `em but we're not ready for a full commitment," I said.
Wes stood up, "Sorry I can't sit here all night. I've got so much laundry to do after being gone for a week."
"I bet ya do. How was work?"
"Some old shit," Wes replied. "They are proving one thing to me. I can't hang with them drinking, including my boss. I don't know how in the world they drink like they do and function the next day."
"I don't know how people do it either," I said.
Wes headed off to start his laundry. I sat around for a little bit before deciding to do something I needed to do. I told Wes I'd be back and went over to Jimmy and Logan's place across the parking lot.
Logan opened the door and welcomed me inside their apartment. Two guys were with them and looked to be close to our age.
"Were your ears burning?" Jimmy asked.
"No, but I hope it wasn't anything bad," I replied and grabbed a chair from their table.
"Not at all. We were telling Alan and Shea how you introduced us to nudism," Jimmy stated.
"Hey, don't you think we need to introduce Jason first?" Logan asked. He pointed out the two. Alan had a buzz cut while Shea's hair was blond and short. They looked to have average bodies. I got up and shook their hands before returning to my seat.
"About that and the reason I came over... PJ and I have decided not to go camping next weekend," I said.
"Perfect," Jimmy said.
"You made your friend feel really good, Jimmy," Alan said.
"Let me explain, Jason. The camp is totally booked unless you're willing to really rough it. Maybe you can tell them you aren't coming but have someone willing to take your spot instead. We wanted them to go but didn't want them far away," Jimmy explained.
"Great, then it'll work out perfect like you said, Jimmy," I laughed.
"Why aren't you going? You loved it last time," Logan asked.
"I was given a better offer," I replied.
"For you, nothing could be better," Jimmy said.
"PJ and I are heading over to the nude beach for the weekend," I stated.
"Makes perfect sense to me, but that could have waited," Logan said.
"It could have, but I wasn't feeling it you might say. I don't know why but I wasn't. Maybe next time we'll all go. So, are Casey and Aiden still on-board or have they backed out?" I asked.
"They're good to go," Jimmy said. "Do you think either them or Alan could borrow PJ's equipment?"
"I see no reason why not," I replied. "I feel so much better now and was really dreading giving you the news."
"It worked out this time," Jimmy said.
It was great getting to know another gay couple. They had moved in a few months ago, close to when I did, but were a few buildings away. They had met Jimmy and Logan on Friday and had been hanging out with them. They had been together six months and had moved for Shea to start law school while Alan worked on his master's degree in education.
I left and went back to my place. Drew had stopped by with Wes now cooking. "What's cooking?" I asked coming in the door.
"Noodles with tomatoes," Wes laughed. "Just throwing something together and seeing what comes of it."
"It's always pretty good," Drew said. "Jason, how was your weekend?"
"Good, and yours?" I returned the question.
"Not bad at all. Ryker has been actually okay if you can believe that," Drew replied. "I was telling Wes all about Ryker and his dad. You missed him coming by Thursday night. It was actually civil."
"That's good to hear," I stated. "What did Ryker say when he left?"
"Not much other than he was actually glad to see him. His dad didn't ask for money or anything. He wanted to see his son to see how he was making it," Drew said. "Jason, I need your services again. Kayly has lined up a nice dinner we are attending Friday night and I don't have shit to wear."
I laughed, "I see. You come down to get the gay boy to help you shop?"
"You know I'm not like that," Drew said. "Kayly loved what you picked out last time but this time I need a dress shirt, slacks and a tie. Also, I'm color blind a little bit."
Wes grabbed a yellow spoon, "What color is this, then?"
"Dude, I know that one. It's like if you put green and reds together," Drew replied.
"So you can't see stop lights?" Wes asked.
"I can see those too, dipshit. Say you put a reddish thing in grass. It doesn't stick out to me like it probably would to you guys," Drew replied.
"I get it. You have a hard time when they're blended together," I said.
"Exactly," Drew said. "I'm not that bad but it does make it hard putting colors together at times. So how about Tuesday night?"
"Sounds good to me," I replied.
"I think my dish is ready. Are you ready to eat?" Wes asked, behind the stove.
"I am," I replied.
"Bring it on Chef," Drew said.
We waited until Wes put the noodles and tomatoes on a plate for us. I grabbed some water for us. Drew took a bit after it cooled down and cut his eyes at me with a weird look on his face. I took a bite and thought it was good. Drew took another bite and ran to the sink to spit it out.
"What's the deal?" Wes asked.
"Oh my fucking god, it is so fucking salty," Drew said and was spitting.
I took another bite to discover the same thing. Wes did as well and started laughing. "Sorry but I put too much salt in it. I put some in the middle of cooking it..."
"Some!" Drew yelled, returning.
"Yeah, just some. I must have salted it in the beginning too," Wes laughed.
"One bite was okay for me then I hit the salt mine. Maybe we can pick through it," I said.
"No, I'm dumping this shit out right now," Wes said. "Sorry guys!"
Drew patted him on the back, "My first time ever to have something from Wes that wasn't great. It's cool dude but I'll be more cautious next time."
We deposed of the salty noodles but it did give us something to laugh about. Instead, Wes put a frozen pizza in the oven for us to eat.
"Next weekend, I think it's time for another epic party at PJ's," Wes said.
"Sounds like a plan to me," Drew said. "I'll be more than ready after Friday night."
"Well... PJ and I have plans and he won't be home," I said.
"Where are you going?" Wes asked.
"We're going to spend the weekend together and check out the nude beach," I replied.
"I swear, you and your nudity!" Wes shouted.
"No doubt my man Jason enjoys it. I don't blame him one bit," Drew defended me.
"Thank you, Drew. It's something I grew up with and continue to enjoy," I said. "It'd be like you and your movies. Given the chance I don't see why you didn't go to one of the studios on your trip. It'd have been perfect for you, Wes."
Wes snapped his fingers, "I wish I'd thought of that. I see where you're coming from. I know you'll enjoy it and feel right at home."
"It even crossed my mind to ask my parents but it was short notice. I can rub it in big time to Nick," I said.
"That dude needs to get his ass back here," Drew said.
"I'll tell him you said that," I smiled. "I'm glad you guys enjoyed having him as much as he enjoyed being around you."
"How was our little buddy, Clint? I know he was all up in your business this weekend," Wes asked.
"He wasn't, but I did suggest that he check out Youth Hope," I replied.
"What's that?" Drew asked.
"From what I know, it's a place gay kids can go and hang out together. Clint went Friday and Saturday night. He met some people there too," I replied.
"Wow that's great!" Wes said. "I didn't know such a thing existed but I can see where it's needed. They can escape the shit that goes on around them."
"Yeah, I hope he likes it. You could just see Clint was aching to be liked," Drew commented.
We sat around until the pizza was finished. We ate every piece of it and agreed it wasn't salty.
"Wes, did Jennifer wear your ass out this weekend?" Drew asked while we sitting around and Wes was finishing laundry.
"Man, she did," Wes said. "Probably no worse than PJ wore out Jason."
"I'm not complaining," I said. "I enjoy sex as I'm sure you two do as well."
"We're guys," Drew laughed. "Kayly fingered my ass the other night while we were fucking around..."
"What did you think?" I asked.
"It wasn't too bad. Wes, you should try it. It could add a little excitement," Drew replied.
"We tried some shit," Wes said while getting up. "Jason, PJ's sister is like her brother."
"How's that?" Drew asked.
"She likes a dick up her ass," Wes replied.
"Fuck, I wanna try that shit with Kayly... no offense, Jason... she thinks it's gay," Drew said. "It's good birth control if you ask me."
"It is," I laughed. "How'd you like fucking Jennifer in the ass, Wes?"
"Well..." Wes stuttered at the washing machine.
"Just admit you like it," Drew said.
"It wasn't half bad but not something I wanna do all the time. I'll leave that to my roomie over there," Wes said.
"Fine with me. I like it," I said and couldn't believe the three of us were having such a frank sexual conversation.
"Jason, excuse my ignorance but doesn't anal sex get messy?" Drew asked.
"You have to be prepared for the moment or it gets shitty," I laughed.
Drew and Wes both laughed. "You can say you had shitty sex," Wes laughed and came back over.
"It can kill the moment," I added.
"I bet," Drew said. "What's your favorite position?"
"Missionary or cowboy for me," I replied.
"Damn, Jennifer is the same way, but mostly missionary," Wes replied. "What's Kayly's?"
"Spoon," Drew replied with a big smile. "I'm like you guys and enjoy missionary the best. It is rather standard but you can look into that person's eyes while your dick is in `em."
"I agree, and see the facial expressions. I'm not very big but when I hit that spot, Jennifer's face goes fucking crazy," Wes said. "Damn, I've never talked like this about sex with my buddies."
"You have with me a few times," I said.
"I meant with a straight guy," Wes said.
"So I'm not your buddy?" I asked and faked sulking.
"My best," Wes replied.
"I know what he means, but this is great. I love hearing about Jason's sex life, too. It proves there's not that much difference," Drew said.
"Except we don't suck dick," Wes said.
"I think it's better than eating pussy," I said.
"You've got a point there. Dick doesn't smell," Drew said.
"Guys, let me say from the bottom of my heart, you make it so easy on me. Being around Clint, I've seen the other side of how gays are treated. He was really to the point that suicide entered his mind," I said.
"People say that," Wes said.
"His mom told us he had a bottle of sleeping pills..." I said.
"OH SHIT!" Drew yelled. "My heart bleeds for him now more. I was like Wes and thought it was a figure of speech."
"It upset me. It made me thankful PJ and I came along when we did and how easy I had it," I said.
"Does he still have the pills?" Wes asked.
"No, he doesn't. He said he didn't need them anymore," I said.
"Let me know if I'm ever needed again," Drew said. "That's a fucking shame but I realize there are so many people like him out there. Not just gays but straight people who see killing yourself as the best way out."
"Me too," Wes said. "Good way to change the subject, Jason."
"It was on my mind," I said.
"I'm glad you mentioned it. When you get back, we'll go back over and mess with Clint again. If I ever see him at college, I'll make sure to say hi to him and see how he's doing," Drew said.
"I'm sure he'd appreciate that," I said.
I hung around them until Drew left about 8. It offered me time to catch up with Mom on the phone and tell her about my upcoming weekend. She was excited for me and knew I'd enjoy it. I messed around on Twitter and saw some of the really stupid shit Nick posted before heading to bed early.
It was odd waking up at 5 to start my day and new schedule. Quickly I saw maybe 10 would be the latest I could endure during the week. It did make for a quick trip with enough time to grab a pastry on the way. The parking lot was mostly empty when I arrived and entered our building. Being early gave me time to sort through my useless emails and set a plan for the day. Cindy came in my office about 6:15 for us to get started. With no interruptions, we were able to do great work.
Walking around and taking a short break, I ran into Dan. He patted me on the back and asked for us to go out to lunch. I agreed and was anxious to hear how things were going.
At lunch, Dan told me about his weekend and how their family was making a smooth adjustment. I was glad to hear everything was working out fine for them. His son Austin was having regular teenage problems that faced most 17 year olds. I remembered those days too well and was able to relate.
Monday night it was back to the gym for four of us with Ryker along. Ryker was in a great mood and kept us entertained on the ride to the gym. Tuesday night was my night with Drew and shopping again. It was fun dressing him up. He was a great and agreeable to everything I picked out for him. I must say he was a real stud in a dress shirt, tie and slacks.
Every night, I talked to PJ but never saw him since I was away each night. He saw Clint once and reported how well things were going for him. As the day approached, I became very excited at the prospect of spending three days on the beach with him. Like Wes the weekend before, it would be a good test for our relationship without the influence of others around.
TO BE CONTINUED...
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