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A Stepbrother's Desire - Josh and Tyson 34
Part 1 Coming Out - Long Chapter
"Fuck Ty," I hissed so quietly. "I can't take much more, baby," I added with a moan. He wasn't exactly pounding me at that moment, he was pushing it into me, his thrusts were slow and deliberate.
"Oh Josh, I'm cumming. I, I," and his head flew forward and he grabbed my lip with his teeth as he came inside me, again!
"Fuck, Ty, You did that twice. My ass is wore out!"
"I know, Josh, I couldn't help it. I was so turned on from this evening. Was it rough?" he asked, collapsing his body onto mine.
"Well, you weren't rough but the attack on my ass was," and he giggled a bit. "Damn. If I can't walk tomorrow people are going to ask why!" and he giggled again.
"Sorry Josh. I don't know when I've been so turned on," and whispering in my ear, "you felt so good tonight."
"Thanks babe. It was a great night. But it's almost 6:30 and I have to go back to my room," and I kissed him again. And fuck, my booty was sore and so were my legs where he had them hiked up over my head for so long. I just needed to stretch out in my bed and let my muscles sort themselves out.
Later, as it was Sunday afternoon, Ty had a busy day. First, he was meeting Jack and Tristan at the coffee shop then he was hanging out with Caleb for a bit to look at a project they had with the same teacher. Mom wanted things from the store and asked me to ride along with her so I could "help her." Uh huh, help alright. She had decided she had questions. How did I feel when I realized I was gay?
"Uh mom, it scared me but I couldn't help it. I knew I liked the kid across the street but I was determined not to let it keep me from my game."
She wanted to know when Ty and I "got together," so to speak.
"Mostly when you all are not home. We don't want to be tacky about it." She said she could appreciate that.
She also asked, like Jordan, if we would have eventually admitted our feelings for each other if I had continued playing football.
"Probably mom, it was like a freight train. I held it off but it was going to happen. He was amazing from the minute I met him," and I think that one scared her because she backed off a bit.
"You know Josh, I told you I'm your mother and I will stand by you. I promise you that. But Ty is mine too and I love him. He is very special and he's shown me several times how much he needs a mother, and, well, I feel the need to be fair with both of you. You're somewhat Bill's son now too and this conversation is very important so that we can manage as parents, fairly, and with proper expectations. Do you understand? Now, what's your plan for Bill?" she asked.
"I guess it's this week but hell if I know what to say."
"He's going to ask you to help him remove the old cork board in the garage because it's worn out and about to fall. Perhaps..." she suggested.
So I thought, "so there it is. The moment I have been waiting for."
Ty pressed me a couple of times about my ongoing mood swings and I did my best to keep him at bay. I knew if I told him what was up, all hell would break loose. I caught him and mom talking quietly a couple of times and I think she was trying to get "closer" to him. He didn't say much about the time with her except that he liked that she was easy to talk to. "That was fair enough," I thought. I didn't tell him everything Bill and I talked about either. I just didn't have this situation in my grip meaning I didn't have control over it. That was frustrating.
On Tuesday I came home to find Ty in an agitated mood. I heard him stomping around in his room, slamming things down. Obviously, I panicked. I bounded up the stairs and he had sat on his bed and was looking at his phone.
"Hey, what's wrong?" I asked as I entered his room.
"Tristan is upset with me. I mean railed me during lunch and he really got me sideways," he said looking up at me with concern. "I told him and Jack about Saturday night and the more he thought about it, the more he flipped. I mean, we couldn't have changed it. I couldn't have texted him and said come on down, you know?"
"I agree. That was a chance event. We had no notice they were going to invite us in. I can see where he would be jealous but getting angry at you isn't going to make it better," I said, sitting down beside him.
"Well he's mad and he stormed off, and I, well, I didn't know what to say," Ty said, regretfully.
"Ty, just let him calm down. There are worse things than him not getting to go to the bar. It really was a fluke. Not like Tristan to begrudge you anything. Maybe he's missing you because he's spending so much time with Jack," I offered.
"Well that may be true."
"Just give him time and he'll cool off. He's jealous and doesn't know where to channel it. He wouldn't have been with us, even if he weren't out with Jack. That was our date night, remember?"
"Yep, that's right."
And Thursday I came home and wasn't quite expecting anything out of the ordinary, except to say my time was basically up and, as if it was my destiny, Bill asked me during dinner if I could help him remove the old cork board that housed tools and stuff from the garage wall. Some of it was loose and he was afraid it would fall off onto one of the cars. I told him I would, and the sinking feeling I felt in my stomach could not be ignored. I was literally counting the minutes until "after dinner."
I went upstairs and put on some old jeans and a jacket since it was cold out. Bill was backing the cars out of the garage to make room. I had never felt so much anxiety and it caused me to walk slowly down the stairs. I passed my mom in the kitchen who was cleaning up with Ty and she winked at me. Perhaps that was an indication that she had given him a heads up and perhaps it wasn't going to be bad after all.
I walked into the garage and it wasn't very cold in there and Bill was already trying to pry one of the boards from the wall. I reached up to provide support and one of the corners came loose very easily.
"You see, Josh. This is what I was afraid of," he said, breaking the cork with little effort. "Rotten. Pure rotten," he said with a laugh. These boards are probably older than you!" he said, acting like that was a big deal.
"But not as old as you?" I said, flipping some humor, which he always liked.
"You saying I need to be pulled down off the walls too? Huh?" he mused.
"You still have some hanging life I would say," I offered.
"Glad you think so," he chirped.
After we had loosened the other corner, the board came down and a lot of dust and debris that had collected behind the board came down with it, splashing to the floor.
"Wow, I said, "it is pretty loose. Glad it didn't fall on one of the cars, after all!" I exclaimed.
"Right. I have been putting it off but knew time was not on my side. I felt this cold weather could expedite the problem so I really appreciate your help, Josh!"
As we were pulling down the second corkboard, I jumped into the matter. "So Bill, um, Dad, I need to talk to you about something. Can we take a minute?"
"Sure Josh, just grab that corner and I'll get this one." I reached up and took the corner and when I saw him pull, I pulled as well and the board came out of the wall without too much effort. The same dust and debris fell to the floor and the corkboard broke in half.
"Whoa!" Bill yelled, as part of the board hit his knee. I grabbed the piece from him and sat it on the ground.
"Thanks Josh. What a mess. So glad we got them down. Now, what's on your mind?"
"Well the question is whether to start at the present and work backwards or to start at the beginning and bring you up to speed."
"That is an ominous proposal, Josh. Are you in trouble?" and while I was shaking my head no, he added, "because this sounds like a setup for some trouble!"
"That may be one way of looking at it, Bill, I mean, Dad. I think I should start at the beginning. So first, when I was about twelve, there was a kid across the street that I became sort of, um, attracted to. He was, well...I kind of figured out that I liked him. I liked him, do you understand?"
"Ok, I might. Go on," he said, becoming more attentive.
"So I liked him a lot and it took a while but I came to the conclusion that I might like other guys like him. So there. That's that. He moved away but I was left with a certain understanding about myself. You get it now, don't you?"
"I think so."
"But because of football, because I progressed so fast, I decided it was best to set aside those "attractions" and focus on the game. Does that make sense?"
"Yes, I think I can understand that," he said quietly.
"So once I graduated, I would go on and maybe live my life but I didn't quite understand all that back then because I didn't "know" people like I do now," I said.
"So Josh, this is a similar conversation as the one I had with Ty some years ago. You are telling me that your sexual preference involves other guys."
"Yes sir, that's what I'm saying." So, he yanked the story away from me and I was going into a skid, I could feel it.
"Ok, well I have some experience here. When Ty came out, I was very confused and, remembering as a young boy, what my Uncle Kelvin had gone through, I really didn't want to see Ty go through anything like that. But his mother, Melinda, made it clear to me, and I can still hear her voice; that we would support Ty no matter what he wanted, needed, or did. I was not in a place to argue with her. She was very strong, Josh. So I processed the fact quickly and well, seeing the kind of boy Ty has turned into, I don't have any regrets. And so, it's a very odd statistic that you should move in and tell me the same thing. Don't you think it's odd?"
"Yes sir, it really hit me hard and fast. But, moving here didn't change my plan. I was still going to play football and so I was willing to keep it under the rug."
"Right. I understand that, especially being in a new school," he said. "But Josh, surely you had to...you came clean with Ty, didn't you? He had to learn about it at some point? It's not like you are as "outward" about the lifestyle. You don't have the same flair as Ty although you do possess very great humor and tolerance," he said genuinely.
"Yes sir. I did my best to keep him out of my business but then things happened. Things we couldn't control."
"You are referring to the bully and the baseball field."
"Yes sir. Then the car accident that took me out of the game."
"Ah," and he was quiet and then his eyes grew wide. His face tightened.
"Josh, is the second part of this admission that you and Ty, well you and Ty became involved?"
"Yes sir, it is."
"Josh! Was this just a fleeting thing, over and done in an instant, or are you telling me you two are in a serious relationship?" he asked with grave concern in his voice. My nerves started shaking.
"It is on-going and it is serious."
"Oh my lord, Josh. How am I to process such a scenario that my son and my stepson have become involved with each other? Did you not think to sit down with your mother and me and talk about this?"
"No sir. I first didn't want to create any problems between you and my mom because she is so dang happy. Ty said the same about you and he was the one, who on our first meeting, warned me that you two were going to be very happy together and for me to get on board." He smiled lightly.
"Why does that sound like Ty?" he asked.
"Because it does. And the other point is that my head, my heart, and all my hormones were in overdrive because he is the most amazing guy I have ever met. I didn't want anything or anyone interfering with what was mine, meant for me, that is," ok and I wished I hadn't said that. "The fact that we had made our feeling known and we were there for each other, might have been the thing that saved me from the dark places Doctor Perrow warned me about," I added, feeling better about that statement.
"Josh, you speak of Ty like a possession. You should understand by now that "belonging" is a placement and an acceptance. It is not ownership!" Bill snapped.
"And I didn't mean to say it that way so sorry. I didn't grow up with guys like Ty and the fact that someone so incredible could find me equally incredible, well, it has made me so happy. We are happy and, well, I think it needs to stay that way," I said with some confidence.
"You might not have the necessary authority to make a decision like that Josh. This is serious and it has ramifications but I don't possess the foresight to know what those ramifications are at this moment. I'm a bit hung up on the manipulation and lies I feel we've been subjected to, Josh. I can't begin to tell you how concerned I am right now and disappointed!" and he was speaking loudly, not yelling, but he was angry.
"I might not have told you the truth but I didn't lie, either. No one ever asked me if I was gay or if Ty and I were in a relationship. No one asked him either. We had a choice to make and we felt that being discreet and not causing any drama was best for the household!" I barked back.
"That may be plausible but falling on the "half truth" argument does not sway my concerns!"
"As a lawyer, you know the upsides of half truths. You all use them everyday don't you, to make sure your clients get off and whatever?" and I regretted that immediately. My temper was flaring.
"That was well rehearsed and well played but you don't understand jurisprudence enough to use my profession against me in such a debate! Whether we put it in fine print or across a header page, a disclosure is still a disclosure and it's up to both parties to exercise their due diligence to ensure they are properly informed!" and Bill was wound up now. I felt like I should take a step back, literally, like adding a foot between us. "You gave us no warning or disclosure, you didn't trust us to help you. You just marched along thinking you could control everything without understanding how such a scenario might affect our social standing, your mother's charity work, and even my relationship with the firm and clients! Imagine if this got out!" he barked. "It's not out is it? Is that why you've chosen this moment to confess?"
"We have a few close friends who know but they aren't telling. Mom found out and she called me out on it last week!"
"Oh she did? And still..."
"She told me she expected me to "man up" about it and that I should tell you and she gave me two weeks!" and I didn't know if I was on a slippery slope right then or not.
"Well, that sounds like her. I think she gave you the best advice. I can always trust her to know what to do. Addressing this with you second-hand would have been half-witted. Where is Ty in all of this?"
"He's in the dark. I didn't want to fret him until you were ready to process the story then talk about it." He shook his head, not saying anything.
"How involved is "involved" Josh?"
"Very."
"I see. Well you have been discreet, I give you that. When I met your mother and learned about you, I was actually quite terrified that you might come here and create a certain animosity between Ty and yourself, the star athlete and my artistic son. But when that didn't come to fruition, and you two seemed to be "thick as thieves" I was so relieved I chose not to press the issue. I advised your mother to leave well enough alone as well. I feel quite foolish, actually. We were not attentive enough, leaving so many risks unmonitored. I'm so disappointed, Josh," he said in a low tone.
"It's better than you make it out to be!" I said defensively. "Our grades are good, we don't fight, we have friends, we behave and meet all the curfews! What else would you want?" I asked.
"You have demonstrated an effective knowledge of what your roles should be, as members of the family, living under the same roof! Those qualities do not constitute a "pass" for creating a risky and embarrassing scenario with your stepbrother!" He paused and I felt like he had drawn the line. I wasn't dropping any more cards tonight.
"Josh, as I said earlier," and he was speaking quietly again, "I need to assess the facts in my head and maybe even take counsel and certainly talk to Ty and your mother,: he said flatly
"He will tell you the same thing I have. It's not like some light switch that you can just turn off and on to suit everyone. I don't plan on giving him up and if that sounds possessive then so be it. You can give it your best but that's where I stand," I said.
"I would suggest that we need some distance as any further discussion isn't probably going to provide better answers" and he walked past me, toward the garage door. He opened the door and looked back at me and said, "sweep up that debris please and throw it in the garbage bin and pull the cars back into the garage," and he walked back slowly back to the house.
Well I did just that. I swept up the mess in HIS garage. I pulled HIS cars back into the garage and I stayed out in HIS garage for a bit because I really hated walking back into that house. That conversation didn't go as I had planned and now the shit is hitting the fan. Just as I stood in the garage, he was probably raking mom across the coals. Ty would probably be next. I thought that things were going to be pretty fucking miserable for the next long while.
I left the garage, turning the lights off and closing the door. I walked into the kitchen to an eerily quiet house. Only the kitchen light was on. There was a buzz and I looked at the kitchen island and saw Ty's phone. He must have just left it there because it wasn't password locked. I picked it up and there were two messages. The first from Tristan saying <we'll talk about it later> and the second from Caleb saying <sorry! it was special but I can't do it again. I like you and want to stay friends. Talk tomorrow?>
So what the fuck was that? What was so fucking special that he couldn't do it again? Did he fuck Ty? Because if he did, that slap that Jordan gave his cousin would be a fucking sunday school lesson compared to what I would do to him. Don't think I was kidding. My head was starting to hurt and I wasn't sure if I should even go upstairs. I had no control of my emotions right now.
But I did go upstairs and figured this couldn't be much worse than what I just went through. I walked up quietly but I threw Ty's door open abruptly. He jerked with a scare.
"You scared me, Josh! What the fuck is going on? The parents are hold up in Dad's study talking about something and I didn't know why you hadn't come back in. What's going on?" he asked.
"Well first, and I didn't mean to read them but your phone was on the island and it went off when I walked in. It seems Caleb is breaking up with you!" and I tossed his phone on his bed. He grabbed it up and read the text. He rolled his eyes up in his head.
"That's not what it looks like Josh. We didn't do anything, well, we didn't do anything much. Let me explain..."
"Save it, Ty. Bigger fish are about to be fried and their names are Josh and Ty!" and he looked at me with a surprised look.
"Huh?"
"I just came out to your dad," and his mouth flew open and I raised a finger to stop him from interrupting. "Mom found the fucking picture and she said she wasn't snooping but I don't believe her. She fucking interrogated me like a prisoner in the state prison and I had to tell her about it all. She gave me two weeks to tell your dad and she told me not to tell you so that the thing didn't blow up," and he was staring at me in total disbelief.
"Josh! Oh my God, Josh! Are we fucked?" he asked.
"I think so. He's pretty mad. I mean fucking mad. Called me a liar and a manipulator. He said I put the family's reputation at risk. Sorry Ty, but I'm really exhausted. I need to go to bed," and I turned to go back to my room.
"Josh, oh Jesus Christ, what are we going to do? What's he gonna do?"
"He's your dad. You tell me. You need to straighten things up with your other boyfriend and tell Tristan to get over the damn bar thing. He's acting like a baby if he's still picking at you!" and I rushed through the bathroom, closing the door quietly, and I crawled into my bed without even taking my clothes off. I thought I should leave them on in case I had to make a quick get away in the night. I really did.
I slept so hard but I had terrible dreams all night. The conversation in the garage went round and round in my head until it had played out a dozen different ways all the way from me crying like a baby to me pushing Bill against the wall, yelling at him to just get over it. I woke up that morning and didn't shower. I just changed clothes and went downstairs. Mom met me at the foot of the stairs. She did the motherly "wipe the hair" thing down.
"Josh, it's going to be ok. I promise. Just need a bit of time. I promise," she said. I gave her a half smile and walked out the back door and down the drive to my car. It was so cold but the air was refreshing. The cold seemed to bring my senses to life. It was earlier than usual but I drove on to school. Ty was in the shower when I left so I didn't have to deal with him. The question popped into my head, thinking about Tristan and the bar; how did we go from heaven to hell in a matter of four days. And here it was Friday and I would have a whole weekend in there, with them, all of them.
So I was a nervous wreck at school and Ginny picked up on it right away.
"Was it bad?" was all she asked.
"I think so," was all I said and I trailed off to homeroom.
I was quiet in the first few classes. Student teacher Burch stopped me before I left Literature and asked if I was ok. I looked a bit tired, not put together as usual. I told him it was ok but maybe we would talk soon. He shook his head agreeably. Lunch came and I think I took three bites of food when my stomach made an awful noise. I started to feel sweaty. Then some nausea came over me. "Oh shit, I'm about to be sick!" I thought and halfway said out loud. People looked at me because I was talking to myself. I left my lunch on the table and ran down the hall. I flew open the restroom door and some guy was washing his hands at the sink.
"This might be fucking gross! Get out of here!" I snapped. He took off quickly as I entered a stall. I was only on my knees for a brief minute when vomit came up and I was heaving into the toilet. I think the school toilet just made it worse because it came and came. Even when there was nothing else to come up, I kept heaving. The green bile warned me that there was little left. Sweat ran down my face. My clothes felt soaked. I pushed my bangs off my forehead because even my hair was wet. I felt like laying down because I might faint but not on these floors! I had to stay on my knees at the least.
I heard the bathroom door and in a moment, someone was knocking at the stall door.
"Are you ok in there?" came a voice I recognized.
"Yeah, I'm ok," I said quietly, trying to sound better than I felt.
"Is that you, Josh? Open up!" he said. I reached up and unlocked the door. It was Brett Winter, just like I had suspected.
"Oh fuck, Josh. What's wrong? Hold on," he said, rushing over to the sink and yanking some paper towels. He rinsed them in cold water and brought them over to me and wiped my forehead and placed the cool cloth against my face, to help cool me down.
"Josh, are you sick? What's wrong?" he asked.
"Yeah, I think I have a bug or something," I said. "Thank you for bringing me the cool towels. Really helped," I added, pushing myself back up. He smiled.
"I'm glad I came along when I did. I just saw hands and knees under the stall so I knew something was wrong. I hope you're better now," he said softly, just dabbing my cheeks again.
"It was really sweet of you, Brett. Thanks," He touched my shirt and felt the moisture.
"You really broke a sweat, man. You might need to go home," he suggested.
"That's probably not a bad idea. I need to get to my locker and get my things."
"Here, let me help," he said, taking my elbow in his hand and leading toward the door. "Do you want another towel?" he asked.
"No," I said, "And seriously, Brett, really appreciate you. You won't blab this up and down the halls, will you?" I asked, partially remembering what Tristan had warned me about. But now I wasn't sure if he was all that bad. He didn't shrink when I opened the door and he saw my nerves floating in the toilet.
"Of course not, Josh. I would do anything for you. This is our secret," and he continued to hold onto my elbow. "You are so fucking awesome, Josh," he said, and looked at me like he wanted to kiss.
"Sorry I don't feel so awesome right now but maybe we can talk sometime," I said and his face beamed. I eased toward the door and as it opened, I saw Ty and Tristan standing there, just about to enter.
"Josh!" exclaimed Ty. "You look terrible!" he said.
"You really do," said Tristan. "Some guy just rushed the cafeteria and said you were going to pass out in here," Tristan said, Ty nodding his head.
"What are you doing, Brett?" demanded Ty.
"Just helping Josh to his locker. He wants to get his things," Brett said.
"We'll take it from here!" Ty barked.
"I got it," said Brett.
"No, WE have it," said Tristan and he and Ty took my arms and dragged me away. I gave Brett a smile and a wink and he gave me a knowing grin. He had one of my secrets for now which kind of turned me on, despite my upset stomach.
"Josh, is this the state of your nerves?" asked Ty quietly. I nodded that it was. "Are you going home?" he asked.
"I think so. Will you report it to the assistant principal's office? I don't want to get in trouble and I don't want them calling mom," I said. Tristan looked so frightened. I guess after Ty's news he wasn't bitching about the gaybar thing anymore. Funny how new news overrides previous news.
I rubbed Ty's head and thanked them both and got my bookbag and headed for the school entrance. I just did turn back to see them watching me, all sorts of communications going on without being said.
On the way home it hit me. It hit me so hard that I ran a stoplight. A whole weekend in there, in that house. Holy shit, I wasn't up for it. I couldn't stand it. I would go crazy not knowing what to say, or where to sit, and what to do.
I pulled up on the curb in front of our house and I got out, knowing what I had to do. I grabbed a large duffle bag. I stuffed it with sweaters and hoodies and some jeans and some shoes. I grabbed my heavy coat, leaving the one I was wearing on. I reached into my desk drawer and pulled my cash stash consisting of $300 and shoved it into my wallet. I grabbed my iPad and a phone charger. I heard the front door open and heard Ty bounding up the stairs. I was about to shut my door and lock it when he barged in.
"What are you doing Josh?" he asked.
"I'm packing a few things. I need a break. I'm getting out of here," I said.
"No you're not! You can't leave."
"Yes I can and I'm about to do so!"
"Josh, the thing with Caleb, it was nothing but a kiss and a blow. We just got carried away. That's all I promise!" he said.
"Just once or more than once?" I asked. "I mean I really don't care. Was just curious."
"It was a couple of times, ok? I know that sounds awful but we didn't fuck. I mean you and Tristan..."
"Stop right there, Ty. I'm not going down that rabbit hole right now. This whole fucking house is a rabbit hole and I'll see you later!" I said, pushing my way past him and out of my bedroom.
"Josh, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. You don't need to go. You CAN'T go! Wait, I'll go with you!" he shouted and he ran to his room and opened his closet door. Fuck, I should have gotten into his safe and grabbed the whiskey that was left over.
"No, Ty, you are not coming with me. I need to go and get away!" He rushed back to me and grabbed my arm.
"Josh! You can't leave me here! I can't deal with all this by myself! You can't do this!" he screamed then he started to cry. "Oh fuck," I thought.
"Ty, listen," I said in a soft voice. "If you come with me, its a fucking CNN moment with police cars and helicopters chasing me all over town. If I go alone, it's a quiet thing and I will just have hell to pay when I get back. It's as simple as that." As he continued to cry, I ran down the stairs and into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of bourbon from the cabinet and I ran quickly out the front door. I was just about to my car when Ty came out and rushed out onto the sidewalk.
"Josh please don't," was all he could mutter. It was like a whisper. I climbed into my car, dropping my bag on the side seat and drove away. I was about to the intersection when I saw in my rearview mirror my mom's car coming down the hill toward our house. The school must have called her and thank God, I got out just in time!
Part 2 Running Away
I got to a parking lot so I could stop and gather my thoughts and my plan. My plan, yeah this was well thought out. The phone was ringing and I knew that was going to be a problem. It was mom then it was Ty and back and forth. Eight missed calls and twelve text messages. If I answer, if I pick that phone up and say hello, the gig is up. I will get talked into coming home and dealing with whatever shit awaits me. Nope, I couldn't do it. So, I switched the thing off. Next, was there any place I could go? I didn't know a single person where they couldn't find me. Even if my friends would shield me, their parents wouldn't. I could go back to Chatham County, check in with Diesel Gray. I doubted even he could stand up to the scrutiny of my mom. He was a limp noodle when it came to her. Jason's? Well mom has met him and he would fall on the list and Dr. Perrow wouldn't appreciate being dragged into this drama. It looked like I would be on my own, until some better plan came to light.
Next question was my whereabouts. I could hang around midtown but that wouldn't take long for them to find me. Ty knows everywhere I could go. Even if I tried to get back into Illusions, the gay bar, he could easily suggest that as well. In fact, it would be interesting to know whether he will "fess up" to that under interrogation. I suppose the "outskirts" so to speak will have to be my stomping grounds at least for the weekend. I wondered if it was true that police would not go looking for you for at least 48 hours prior to going missing. They didn't have time to go looking for every teen that "needed a break" anyway.
My gas tank was mostly full so that was a good thing. I might need to park and walk around by foot to save gas. I would have to eat and I might need to get a room somewhere. It would have to be cheap. I went inside the QT and got a bottle of coke and headed out for the highway. I was out on the east side pretty quickly which was nice because traffic hadn't built up yet. I wandered the old mall out there. Some of the stores were normal places but the crowd out that way wasn't what we were used to and some of the stores had a more "ethnic" vibe. I sat in Chick-fil-A for a bit after finishing a chicken sandwich combo and it was nearing 7 pm. I checked the phone. 18 voice mails and 22 texts. Why didn't they just stop? I wasn't going to answer. Not happening! The movie theatre was across the street so I thought to drive over, park way down the other side of the parking lot, and get a ticket. Damn movie tickets are expensive, too. Can't do this frequently but it would occupy some time. The movie, a thriller was slated to be good and it turned out to be so. Boy visits girl's family home. Girl's family is totally fucked up and is mind boggling people so they "act accordingly" by their standards. It was good, though.
So after 10 pm, I was feeling very antsy. It was dark and cold and this is where things aren't what you're used to. I drove down the main road leading back to the city. I found a nice Hampton Inn and parked and went into the lobby. A nice lady wearing a blue jacket greeted me.
"How can I help you, sir?" she asked.
"I need a room," I said.
"Is it just for you?" she asked.
"Yes ma'am, just one person."
"We have a room for $79 plus taxes and fees," she said.
"Ok that's fine," I replied.
"License and credit card?"
I handed her my licence. She looked it over.
"Your credit card?" she asked.
"I don't have a credit card. I will be paying cash," I replied.
"Sorry sir, we can't let you have a room without a card on file. It's our policy," she said. I certainly didn't want to create a stink but I needed to know if this was how it's going to be.
"I really need a room tonight ma'am. It's cold outside. Are all the hotels going to require a credit card?"
"Yes sir, most all hotels have to have a card for incidentals and especially in case of damage. I'm sorry."
"Is there any place that won't require a card?"
"There may be some places out on the edge of town. You have to be careful though. Safety, you know," she said nicely, looking at me like I was pitiful. I couldn't stand that so I thanked her, picked up my bag and went out to the car. What a waste of gas, going back to where I had just come from.
I drove back to the east side of the city and found a motel on the side of the road that looked like it was at least occupied by some truckers and people passing through. It looked like hell, otherwise. I didn't believe it could be very expensive. I pulled into the parking lot. It was quiet. There was a light on in the little office. I thought, "well here goes nothing!"
I walked in and an older gentleman, who probably wasn't as old as he looked, was reading a paper. He looked up and asked if he could help me.
"I need a room please, for one night at least," I said, with a formal tone. He got up from his chair and eased over to the counter and looked through his spectacles at me.
"Son, what's your name?" the man asked me.
"Josh. Joshua Warner," I said.
"How old are you Mr. Warner?"
"I'm 18, sir."
"You got a young lady with you?" he asked.
"No sir, it's just for me. I just need a place to sleep. It's cold out," I said with a little pleading in my voice.
"Son, I don't believe I have any occupancy tonight. You traveling through?" he asked.
"Well, yes sir. Sort of. The sign out front said "Occupancy Available" so I thought I would check. Just need a safe place to sleep. I'm really tired."
"Let me see your license," he said. I handed him my license.
"Park Ave," he read. "You haven't traveled far," and he laughed a gruff laugh. "You running to something or away from it?" he asked.
"I can't answer that question, sir. I just need a room," I said once again.
"Son, all sorts of things happen out here and I'm pretty good at washing it away. You belong to someone, and whoever that someone is, isn't someone I want to tangle with...should anything happen to you out here. You get the picture?"
"Is something really likely to happen? Seems quiet to me," I said.
"It's very quiet tonight but that can change in a damn minute. Can't take the risk, son. You need to head back into the city and climb back into your own bed. Believe me," he said and just then a couple of police cars whizzed by with sirens wailing. Scared me to frickin death. I thought they were coming for me!
"It's just getting started son," he said. "You be careful out there. Go home, Mr. Warner," he said, going back to his seat and picking up his paper. Oh fuck it all to hell! I stormed out of the place and slammed the door to my car. Fuck, fuck, fuck! I picked up the phone and powered it on. 22 voicemail messages and 50 texts. One popped up from Bill, <Josh, Come home> . My leg started to shake and I started breathing heavily. Fuck it alright! I will go home and deal with this shit show. Then, I changed my mind again. No, I haven't done anything wrong that I need to apologize for! Fuck Bill for trying to make me feel guilty! I wasn't going to put up with that so I opened the text to Ty. I didn't read all the messages he had sent. I just sent one so they would sleep. <I"m ok. I will be back soon> Whether that was true or not, I wanted to give him some hope.
I pulled into an empty parking lot and looked into the darkness, just glad to see car lights drive by every so often. Fortunately, mom left her stadium blanket in the trunk so here was my life. I pulled it out, wrapped up in it, climbed back into the car, and took the bottle of bourbon from under the seat and mixed it with the coke I bought earlier. The smooth warmth had an immediate effect on me. Not getting drunk but soothing my nerves. Its oak taste could be tasted from my lips to the back of my throat. Polishing off the drink, I wrapped myself up in the stadium blanket, reclined the seat and went to sleep.
I woke up very early after tossing and turning most of the night. Laying in this reclined position didn't suit me very well. I was in a terrible mood. The blanket on top of my jacket had served a purpose but I needed to get moving around so that I could find warmth indoors!
So this is a pretty miserable day. The weather is cold and still. The skies are gray. Doesn't look good at all. I meander around parts of the city I have never been to. I did find one flea market place that was busy with people and it was fun to people-watch. Many latinos and some of those guys were "interesting" to watch too. One or two were very hot. But what I started to do while browsing around was text Ty to come meet me at this place. He would love it! There were so many cool things that he and Tristan could make a year round store out of. This stuff might only get attention from people who knew to come but his online store could get some serious buyers. Well, that was meaningless right now because I wasn't going to text anyone.
I was hungry but I decided to save my money for later in the day to see if I could get by on a single meal. I should just do one of those cheesy buffet places and eat until I couldn't eat anymore to constitute one meal. But I found some interesting roads to drive around on after getting on and off the interstate and there were some horse farms out here in the country. They were really cool looking places with large fields and tracks and fences and I came to an intersection and I recognized this road. It was the highway that led out to where Ricky lived. My lights went off! Well, it would be awesome if I could pop in on them. Ty wouldn't think of me going out there but it was a risk. But also, there was a nice quiet clearing in that little field where I wouldn't be bothered by anyone. I could relax there for an evening. "Fucking bingo!" I yelled out loud.
I drove along the hilly road. It was a quiet stretch, not much traffic. The skies were so gray it made me think of snow but it was too cold for that. I passed the clearing and I didn't see anyone parked out there so I felt kind of happy. I drove a little further and came to Ricky's house. There was a car parked beside the house but I didn't see anything going on. I drove on into town since it was getting close to 5 pm. I could get a burger out here. I really should have thought more about the buffet places because that was really a good idea. Maybe tomorrow I would try it. In the meantime, I got a burger and some fries and a sweet tea from the diner and took care of some restroom business in town. I drove back out to the clearing and ate my food.
After I finished eating, I decided to walk around a bit. There were some paths in the woods. The air and the walk made me feel good. I was feeling a little sad about this whole nightmare and couldn't figure out how to make it sustainable. At some point, I was going to have to swallow my pride and go home. But maybe the "distance" Bill said he needed would provide some benefit and we could talk rationally about the fact I am not breaking up with Ty. Yeah, I'm a little pissed at this Caleb drama but whatever. Caleb is no threat to me and I knew Ty has had a little infatuation with him. What could I say after all I had put Ty through with Tristan. I came across the edge of Ricky's yard. I knew if I could get in there, he would welcome me, and I bet he would welcome having a warm body like mine to spoon him and make him feel sexy. Then, a car pulled up carrying several young guys and Ricky climbed out of the backseat and walked into his yard. They backed out with him waving and my heart skipped a beat. He looked so happy, so fresh. He was getting out. He had friends. He didn't look like the same kid I remembered. He was filling out or at least he was wearing jeans that fit better. He was what I had expected he would become - a hot young guy. I was feeling that in my jeans too. I turned and made my way back to the car. Once in, I pulled up some porn on my iPad and took some swallows of the bourbon, hidden under the seat. I was picturing cuddling with Ricky and what it would feel like to have his smooth dark skin under me. I was envisioning what kissing him would be like. I was picturing fucking him and showing him some love. I pictured Ty there, with his cock in Ricky's mouth while I was licking Ty's ass. A vision of Brett came to mind in the boys room, dropping to his knees and sucking me off in there. He had cock suck lips. I would want him to drain me, to suck all my cum out. I knew that was what he wanted anyway.
"Oh fuck, fuck me Josh. Fuck me like a man!" I heard Ricky saying in my head. "Fuck!" I screamed in the car as I let loose a welcomed blast of cum all over the athletic towel I had draped over my lap. Ok, that was a hot fantasy. Damn, my body temperature had gone up a few degrees and I felt warm. Of course, that was all just imagination and it's not cheating on anyone to dream. I climbed into the backseat where I could stretch out better, wrapped the stadium blanket around me, and took a few swigs of my sweet tea. I picked up my phone and fuck the message numbers just kept going up. I surprised myself and pressed "Dad" from my Contacts list. It beeped once and went to voicemail.
I said quietly, "Hey Dad, you probably know already. Everything has hit the fan. I'm on the run. I don't know what to do so I decided to call you. I'll talk to you soon. Later," and I hung up and powered it back down. Dozing off was rather easy after a juicy burger, one of the better I had eaten lately, along with a bourbon and coke, and a good cum. I might do that again later. Those images were pretty awesome. I guess I had gone so long not needing images to jack off to that I forgot what a turn on they are. I enjoyed those images as I drifted off to sleep.
Something woke me up. It was quiet and still. I had pulled the blanket over my face in my sleep maybe because it was so cold. I looked toward the window and I was terrified by what I saw. Snow! Snow covered the windows. It had either snowed or was still snowing but I couldn't tell. I leapt up from the seat, throwing the blanket aside. I opened the door and I couldn't believe my eyes. The car was covered in snow but so was the field, the trees and the road! Oh my Goddamn! It was coming down hard too. I looked at my watch and it was only 8 pm. I hadn't slept that long so it must have started right after falling asleep. I looked down and it was a good couple of inches on the ground. "Oh dear God!" I thought. "What the fuck is going on?" I screamed out loud.
I walked over to the road and it was mostly covered. "What the hell am I supposed to do with this shit!" I screamed out. "This is not for me! This is not how I should be living!" I screamed to no one in particular. "What am I going to do now!!!" I felt tears burning my eyes along with the snowflakes pelting my cheeks. I ran back to the car. I turned the ignition on and felt warmth start blowing from the heater. I grabbed the snow thing from the glove compartment and pushed the snow off the windows. It came off easily so it was a light snow. I turned the window defrost on full blast. I put the car in gear to see if it would move and it did. The plan? I could definitely go to Ricky's where it was warm and safe or I could try to make it back to the city. If I went slow and got back to the main road there would be plenty of traffic making the roads passable. I decided to do it. These front wheel cars are good in the snow anyway. I powered up my phone and 40 voicemail messages and 96 texts. Ok, I wasn't going to get into all that right now. I pulled out of the field and onto the road. The car eased down the road easily, almost quietly and since one car had passed, I had tracks to follow. This was a good thing. It really was beautiful out here, despite the stress of it. I gained a little momentum and the car was going fine on the road. "Stay the course," I told myself. I turned the radio on and listened to the news and weather. It was snowing more out here than at home but at home was getting a blast as well. "Main road" I told myself. "Stay the course!"
Cruising along, with the heat on and the radio playing, my nerves started to settle down. I approached the big hill that led down to the intersection that would get me access to the highway. I didn't try to use the brakes because the hill was steep and the car was moving fast. All would have been fine until three large deer belted out of the woods, crossing the road to the forest on my left side. Ok, that did it. I hit the brakes and caused the car to start sliding. The back end tried to come around to the front. I hit the accelerator and steered the other way which mostly helped but then two baby deer came out onto the road and doing all I could to miss them, turned the wheel the other way. The result was disastrous.
The car sped toward the left side of the road. There was a large embankment and of course there was no stopping the Camry at that point. I went over and it was a steep hill. I slid down, the back end trying to take over again causing the car to slide sideways!
"Fuck fuck fuck!" I shouted. I had no control. This must have been a hill much like what Ricky had experienced when they pushed him down. And just like he found out, at the bottom of a big hill, there always has to be a tree and I slammed sideways into it. In just the moment I had to think, all the glass on my side of the car was broken, my head was stunned and I thought I was going to be sick. I felt terrible pain and stinging and there was blood all over me! The one thing I thought I heard my mom's voice like at Ricky's concert, "Oh heavens. What has he done?" and I thought I smelled her perfume and then the lights faded and then it was quiet.