All Alone: Chapter 5
All Alone
Copyright © 2013 by JD
Authors Note: This story you are about to read is one of emotions. I have laughed, got angry, cried, and even depressed while writing this story! Most of all, I enjoyed writing it. I hope you the reader will enjoy it as much as I did. For those who would like to email me, you can reach me at johndazel@hotmail.com. Please remember that if you like the stories here on Nifty to donate whatever you can to help keep this wonderful site up and running.
Now on to my generic disclaimer!-
The story you are about to read contains diaper use, violence, adult language and strong sexual content. The following is evil, illegal, should be banned, and all that other blah, blah, blah. If reading a coming of age story of self-discovery about pre-adolescent and adolescent boys that wet their beds, wear diapers, and explore their awakening sexuality with each other does not tickle your pickle (or if the law in your area says that pickle tickling is illegal) then don't read it.
Chapter 5: Thursday November 14th, 2013 - 4:49pm
As I sat there with nothing to do; my mind began to replay the events of the day. Unconsciously, I watched them go by. It wasn't until I got to the point where I had my accident, that I became more aware of these thoughts. As the embarrassment of the situation came back to me, I also remembered the fear I had been feeling. Boy I had been scared that I was about to be yelled at! Instead, I found that Miss. Benson, whose name I hadn't known yet, was quite understandable about the whole thing.
"Jamie, I am so terribly sorry!" She apologized.
For Some reason, my mind had not connected the words she was saying, to my situation. In fact, when she reached back towards me; I shrank as far back into the seat that I could. She of course had noticed my withdrawal and must have known that I was afraid of being punished. Now if this had happened with my mom, I would know that she would have been supportive and tried to make me feel better. After everything that happened today though, I had no idea how this strange woman was going to react. I did after all pee my pants like a big baby and got her seat wet in the process. So, I assumed the worst and prepared myself for it.
"Jamie, please don't be frightened! I promise I won't hurt you." Miss. Benson pulled her arm back and after giving me a worried but friendly look, she got out of the car.
I watched with fear as she opened the back door to let me out. Again I shrank away from her. I was still afraid of being spanked or smacked for what I did. Though I had been expecting it, when the blow never happened, I started to feel a little braver. Slowly I got out of the car. Worried that the blow may still come, I kept my eyes on her.
I stayed out of hands reach just in case it was some sort of trick. Now don't ask me why I felt this way as I was not treated this way from my mom. I guess it was because of the unknown factor that I became afraid of being severely punished.
For a few minutes, neither one of us moved or said anything. As I watched this lady, I noticed a change from her earlier attitude. She no longer seemed cold or uncaring. Her facial features seemed to project warmth and a motherly love. I knew that this woman was not my mother but for some reason I felt a closeness to her.
Slowly, I edged closer and closer to Miss. Benson. Even though I did not know her name then, I felt like I knew her or the type of person she was. I finally saw it in her eyes, she was a mother herself and suddenly I was no longer a job to her but a scared child.
As my fear disappeared, I became aware of others. Even though no one seemed to be looking my way, I became more aware of my wet condition. Instinctively, I reached down and tried my best to hide what I had done but it was to no avail. The wet spot completely covered the front of my jeans.
Ashamed of myself, I started to cry and that was when Miss. Benson opened her arms to me. I didn't hesitate at all. As if she were my mother, I ran into those open arms. Clinging tightly around her waist, I cried into her bosom.
"Shhhhh." Miss. Benson cooed. "Don't you worry Jamie, you are perfectly alright. You just had a small accident is all." She continued to try and calm me down. Never once did she raise her voice in anger or strike me.
I couldn't begin to tell you how nice it was to cry. There was just so much to cry about and I had been holding it in way too long. I knew I was cry for more than just my wetting accident. I was also crying for my missing mother. Much had happened that day and I had a fear that it was only going to get worse.
Finally, when there were no longer any tears, my sobs came to an end. Miss. Benson gave me some Kleenex that she must have gotten out of her purse while I was still crying. I used it to wipe away my straggling tears and blow my nose.
"Are you feeling better?" Miss Benson asked soothingly. I nodded my head. "I guess you really needed that cry." She smiled as she said this. "Do you feel up to getting into some dry clothes?"
I nodded my head again. "Yes ma'am."
Miss Benson smiled at me then retrieved my bag from the backseat. "I hate to rush you but we really need to hurry and get you changed. I am on a timetable and we need to get back on the road as soon as possible." She explained to me.
I nodded my head to show her I understood. We then walked into the gas station.
The gas station included a large convenience store and had what appeared to be a car repair shop on the right side of it. We had gone into the convenience store side. Miss Benson spotted the cashier and walked over to him.
"Excuse me sir, can you point me to where your bathroom is?" Miss. Benson asked the man.
"Yes, it is in the back." And the attendant pointed towards the back of the convenience store.
Miss. Benson thanked the man and holding my hand walked me to the back where the bathroom was located. We passed the chip and candy aisle, and for a moment I forgot about my wet pants as I looked at all the junk food. Didn't I once hear that sweets were capable of making you feel better?
When we reached the bathroom I thought at first she was going to come in with me. No matter how much better I felt about her, I didn't want further embarrassment.
"Can I do it myself?" I asked.
She smiled and handed me my bag. "Of course you can Jamie. Just make sure to hurry, okay?"
I nodded my head, "yes ma'am." I answered quietly.
As I opened the door, Miss. Benson stopped me. "Please remember to wash yourself before putting on your clean clothes. Okay?" Again I nodded and then she added, "I will get you something to put your wet clothes into."
I again thanked her and entered the bathroom. Once the door closed, I saw the lock and reached out and turned it. I wanted to make sure that no one else could come into the bathroom as I changed.
I quickly stripped out of my wet jeans and undies. And like Miss. Benson asked, I tried to clean myself. I took some paper towel and wet it down. I then put a little soap on it and proceeded to use it to wipe the pee off of my body. Once clean I then used some more paper towels to dry myself with.
Opening my bag, I found some clean undies and pants. I was in the process of putting my shoes back on; when I heard a knock at the door.
"Jamie, are you about done in there?" I recognized Miss. Benson's voice as she asked this.
"Yeah I am done." I said as I finished tying my other shoe. Not knowing what to do with my wet things, I opened the bathroom door.
Before I could ask about my wet things, Miss Benson handed me a small plastic bag. "Here you go Jamie. Put your wet things in this."
I did as I was asked and then followed her back out to the car. Once again I got into the backseat but this time on the other side. I did this because I didn't want to sit in the wet spot. Again I buckled myself in while Miss. Benson got behind the wheel. A few minutes later we were back on the road. Unlike earlier though, Miss. Benson seemed more willing to talk to me.
"I know that you are worried about your mom. I also know that you have no idea what is happening and feel like you have no control over your life right now. Please know that the police are going to do everything they can find your mom. While they are doing that, it is our job to make sure you are being properly taken care of."
"Where are you taking me?" I asked quietly.
"As I explained earlier, I am taking you to a foster family where you will stay until you are either moved or your mother has been found."
"Do I have to stay there?" I asked. "Why couldn't I just stay back at the apartment?"
"Jamie, I am sorry. You are too young to be left alone."
"But Mary could stay with me."
Miss. Benson looked at me in her rearview mirror. "Is Mary a relative?" She asked this as if it was important.
"No, she is my babysitter." I responded and found myself thinking that maybe the worker would change her mind about making me stay with people I didn't know. Unfortunately, that was not going to be the case.
"I am sorry, but the state will not allow it." Miss. Benson said sadly. It was almost if she had wished that she could have let me stay with Mary.
Disappointed, I slumped back in my seat. I closed my eyes and found myself wishing that this was all just a dream. Unfortunately, nothing changed when I reopened them. I was still in the backseat of the worker's car, on my way to my new temporary home. For a while, there was silence.
"What will happen to me once I am there?" I asked finally breaking the silence.
"You will be assigned a social worker who will then come and visit you. It will be his/her job to make sure your needs are being taken care of." She explained.
"Will someone let me know if they find my mother?"
"Of course, I am sure they will let you know if they locate your mom."
"What about school?" I asked.
"When you get assigned your caseworker, that person will then take care of your schooling. For now, you will be excused."
"Well at least I would get some time off from school." I thought to myself. Still, I knew I would be more than happy to go back to school if it meant my mom was okay.
"How long do you think it will take before they assign me a caseworker?" I asked.
"I am not sure. It will probably be a day or two before it happens though." She informed me.
As we continued to drive down the road, I found myself wondering why I had to go so far away for this foster family. Not able to figure it out, I finally asked the worker about it.
"Ma'am, why do I have to go so far away to live with this foster family? Don't they have people closer or could they have someone come and stay with me at our apartment?"
"I am sorry Jamie, but there is no one closer available. We do try to keep you at least in your own school system or county when we can. Unfortunately, we don't have enough foster parents in every town or county and because of this; we have to go outside the county." Miss. Benson explained to me.
Now sitting in my new room and thinking back to this conversation, I realized that there was one question I should have asked. I should have asked about my new foster parents. So far I had no real knowledge of them other than what I had observed so far. To be honest, I didn't like this place very much. I found Mrs. Jackson strict and it didn't seem like she liked me that much.
I sighed as I thought about this. Maybe I wasn't being fair to her. I did after all just get there. I thought about it some more and came to a conclusion. I decided for the time being, I would try and do what I can to show her, I was not going to be a problem.
After making this decision, I spent the rest of my time thinking about what happened to my mom. Where was she? Was she okay? Why didn't she call me? These and other questions filled my mind as I tried to sort through them and come up with some answer to this mystery.
Eventually I heard Mrs. Jackson call me for dinner. As I went downstairs to meet the rest of the Jackson family, I had one last thought of my mother. I wondered if wherever she was, if she was like me and ... All Alone!