Andrews Strength

Andrew's strength - Chapter 6

I was awake in a second. "Nick! How are you?"

"I'm fine. I called to..."

"You remember everything?"

"Yes."

"Great."

"Or not. Listen, I'm really sorry, Andrew. I can't believe how I acted in the hospital. I had no idea who you were and then... that thing with George. I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted."

"Really?" He asked, perhaps a little surprised how fast I did.

"Yes. Honestly, I felt a bit down but it's better now."

"I'm so sorry."

"Hey, I already accepted your apology. So, how are you?"

"I'm better. I was released yesterday. Of course I still hurt everywhere but it's better. And when I woke up today I just suddenly remembered."

"Wow."

"Yes. You know..." He was quiet for two seconds and then said: "When I read your letter I first thought: What the heck does he know? But then came the accident and... I forgot everything and my life was easy."

"And now that it's back?"

"I think I can understand you better. And I'm so happy I got to know you. And..." He paused again for a few seconds and I just waited. "I think the same. But... we aren't at the same place and should both try to find someone we can spend the rest of our lives with."

"Yeah." I said, knowing that it had to be that way. Though I wondered how many relationships were lifelong. Especially gay relationships. They tended to break much faster than 'normal' ones, I read a while ago. "Well, you already found someone, didn't you?" I asked.

"Oh, no, not exactly. I have no idea where this thing with George is going. I mean, I'll go to Florida soon and the situation is similar to ours. I just hope I'll find nice friends in Florida and if I'm lucky... the one."

"I'm sure you will. So when are you going? The sememster already started."

"A little later. It really annoys me that the accident had to happen. I'll be at least one week late and that's a lot."

"Yes, but you'll do great."

"I hope so. Well, how did you start? How's it?"

"Interesting. I have nice roommates but I haven't met many people yet."

"Are they cute?" Nick asked and I could almost see his smile.

"Yes. Well, two are real jocks and the other one... yes as well."

"Found any possible candidates?" He asked and I thought we sounded a bit like girls, talking about the guys they thought were cute.

"Perhaps. There's one in class. Cute but completely ignored me." I answered, thinking of Shane.

I heard him chuckle. "You like challenges, huh?"

"Yes. I'm so gonna get under those clothes."

"Gosh, such talk in the morning."

"It was you that called."

"I know. Did I wake you up?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry."

"You're not." I said and saw his huge grin before me and felt so much better. It wasn't necessary to have him as a boyfriend. It was just as fun and cool to have him as a friend.

"Caught me."

"Yes."

"Well, tell me how it goes with that guy... what's his name by the way?"

"Erm..."

"Don't tell me you don't know."

"No, but..."

"What?" He asked and sounded puzzled. I turned around and saw Nate looking at me and hoped I didn't say anything that could lead him to think I was gay. No, I didn't. I hoped.

"Morning Nate." I said.

"Morning."

"Who's that?" Nick's curious voice asked.

"My roommate. I guess I woke him up."

"Oh, and you're really sorry, right?"

"Suuure."

"Haha, well, it was good to talk to you. Call me, okay?"

"I will. Bye."

"Bye." He said and I still had a small smile on my face and decided to call him frequently. I hung up and then saw Nate going to the shower. He rarely talked before he took his shower.

Suddenly I felt like going to the martial arts rooms. I hadn't trained in a while and missed it a lot.

When I got to the rooms I was surprised to see how many people were already there. In the first big room was a coach with his students. They were all boxers. But I knew that there were also karate-classes.

The coach walked around, gave orders, corrected stances... And all the guys training were working really hard. Many were training by themselves but there were two guys in the ring. One of them was really fast and I could see that his punches were heavy.

That moment someone bumped into me. I turned around and saw... Shane! The ignoring-Andrew-guy from class.

"Sorry." He said and then looked up. How big was the chance to run into him on the huge campus this early in the morning?

"It's alright."

He nodded and that moment the coach saw us and came over.

"Hi, I'm coach Ellington. Are you guys new?" He asked.

"Yes. I wish to attend karate classes." Shane answered. The coach nodded and then looked at me.

"Me, too." I said.

"I'll get your trainer. Wait here." He said and then went into an other room.

"So, you're doing karate as well." I said and looked at Shane. He looked at me for one, two, three seconds without saying anything or moving any muscle at all. But then he nodded.

"Yes." He said. "I've been training for ten years and don't intend to stop."

"Cool. I've been training four years. And also taekwondo."

He just nodded and I remained silent since he didn't seem to want to talk to me. A moment later coach Ellington came back with a middle-aged man.

"Guys, this is our karate instructor." The coach said. That moment we heard a grunt and the opponent of the good boxer went down. Coach Ellington excused himself and went to help the k.o.ed guy. I could imagine that it really hurt since the good boxer put his whole bodyweight in his punches.

"Hello, I'm Gion Sensei. Come with me." The karate instructor said and led us the other big room. There were people in gi's training kata and kumite.

"Do you want to attend a training? See how it is?" He asked after we introduced ourselves.

"Sure."

"Which grade are you?"

"I'm a first Dan." Shane said.

"Second Kyu." I said.

"Ok. Here are gis for you. There are the changing rooms. I want to see how good you are."

We did as he said - without saying anything at all to each other and I wondered a bit about Shane. But then I thought back to the time in high school. I'd been avoiding everyone, never looked at the others, never said something because I didn't want to stand out. I'd just wanted to be left in peace. But I wasn't the same anymore. I wanted to meet people, find friends and much more. And for some reason, I wanted to become friends with Shane. Perhaps Nick was right and I loved challenges.

After we changed we went into the room where all the others were and participated in the training. Gion Sensei was strict and the training was harder than the one back home. But it felt great to train again. We did a few combinations and then a kata. Later we had to pair up. Shane and I did because all the others already knew each other and built groups in a second. We had to put on schooners and Sensei let us fight for three minutes.

We bowed and then started. Shane didn't hesitate a second and attacked. Luckily I was prepared and fought back. He was good and his techniques were precise and fast. But he wasn't as strong as me. I tried not to use too much energy. I didn't want to hurt him after all. He landed some hits, as did I.

Later we changed partners, faught again and I really enjoyed it.

"Yamei!" Gion Sensei said after the last fight.

We all stood in a row, sweating, panting and exhausted. We bowed and practice was over. All the others went to change and only Shane and me stayed back.

"So, how did you like it?" Gion Sensei asked.

"It was good. Where can I get an application form?" Shane asked.

"Here." He said and handed Shane one.

"Are there rooms to train by myself?" I asked.

"Yes. We have two rooms that are always open to train. In one we have the usual equipment."

"And when are the classes?"

"You can see the training hours here."

"Do we have to attend every training?" I asked, surprised by the amount of lessons. There were also specific classes like kumite training on thursday.

"No. That's impossible. I'm sure you have a lot to study and sometimes the classes overlap with others. It's a bit of a free class. You come whenever you have the time to. But I expect my students to train at least three times a week."

"Ok. That's cool."

I took one application form as well and then noticed that Shane was already gone.

"Did you hold back during training?" Gion Sensei suddenly asked.

"Huh?" I asked, surprised by his question. Never had anyone noticed that I held back.

"Ever heard of qi?"

"Yes."

"You mastered it, didn't you?" He asked.

"Yes."

"That's amazing. There aren't many people that have. I myself have never mastered it and I probably can't teach you much. You're most probably stronger than me. But you can use the rooms every time."

"Thank you."

"Oh, one more thing. Are you interested in a competition?"

"What competition?"

"You saw the guy in the ring that knocked the other one out, right? Coach Ellington's students and mine have a few tournaments every year. It's very different to fight against a boxer. And none of my students can win against him."

"I see. I'll think about it." I said and saw Gion Sensei's eyes lit up as if he was sure he'd finally beat the boxers. There was probably some kind of rivalry between him and Coach Ellington.

"Okay. See you around." He said.

"Bye Sensei." I said and was sure this was going to be interesting.

---oOo---

"Andy! I miss you already!"

"Oh Jules. I miss you, too. But I'll be home this weekend."

"How is it?"

"Interesting. I met some cool people."

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Where did you hear that from?"

"I just wondered."

"Well, no. I don't."

"I see. Tell me if you find one." He said and I wondered a bit where his sudden interest in girls was coming from. Wasn't he a bit young? On the other hand, he was a real gentleman and knew how to treat a lady. He had proven it on the ship when he danced with the girl.

"I will."

"Cool. And Andrew... that guy in my class..."

"Yes?" I asked.

"He doesn't bully Zach anymore."

"Wow. That's great. What happened?"

"The teacher talked to him."

"Oh. I see." I said and wondered what would have happened if a teacher had talked to Black or Marc. Would it have changed anything? I surely wouldn't have become so strong but becoming stronger had been my whole life and now that I had achieved it...

There wasn't anyone I had to beat except for that good boxer. I had reached my goal and suddenly I realized that I didn't really have one anymore. The whole summer vacation had been fun and there was a lot going on but it was all unplanned and just happened.

Was it my goal to find true love? Or to do well at school? I never had a lot of problems with classes.

It would probably help me to call Sensei, wise Sensei, who always seemed to know what would help me and what was important in life. And Tanya. I had to call her as well. She was always there for me and I missed her a lot.

"Is something wrong?" Julian asked and pulled me away from the thoughts that began to whirl around in my head.

"No, it's nothing." I said.

"Good. Ah, dad wants to talk to you."

"Ok. Bye Jules. Love you."

"Bye Andy. Love you, too."

My father came to the phone and I had to tell him in detail how everything went. He was delighted to hear that my roommates were all nice and that I intended to join the martial arts club. In the end even Jessica came to the phone to say hi.

"Was that your family?" Nate asked when I finished the phone call.

"Yes."

"Cool. I haven't called mine and probably won't."

"Why?"

"Don't know. Our relationship isn't as good as yours."

"It wasn't always that good."

"Hey guys." Said Bo and Tyler. They always (dis-) appeared at the same time. Now that I thought about it, I never saw them without the other. They were always together. And when I saw them outside, they were always surrounded by girls and other jocks.

"Hi."

"Know what?" Bo asked.

"What?"

"Hehe, we saw something reeeeeally interesting on our way." Tyler said.

"What?"

They both grinned. "We saw two guys making out in a parking lot!"

"It was..." Tyler began.

"...like this." Bo said and pulled Tyler in his arms. They acted as if they kissed each other, then laughed loudly and fell on the bed.

"Guys! You can't do this!" Nate said with a disgusted look.

"Hehe, don't worry. We aren't fags." Tyler said.

I remained silent.

---oOo---

The week passed fast. I went to train every day and the rest I did homework or hung out with Nate. We only had one class together but ate lunch together. I also saw Shane a few times but he still ignored me. Not that I really cared.

I went home for the weekend and spent a lot of time with Julian. We also went to visit Sensei and Tanya and had a great time.

One day when I was back in college Shane looked at me after class and said: "You know, you're not as bad as I thought."

I was taken aback for a second. "What?"

"My friend and I talked about you and we wondered if you wanted to eat lunch with us."

"Erm..."

"Oh, you don't have to. I know I wasn't really friendly." He said and I almost rolled my eyes. Not friendly. He had completely ignored me for a whole week. For no apparent reason.

"It's alright. But may I ask why you're asking me to?"

"Oh, well. You seem to be nice even though you're one of those guys we went to high school with. And we both made some unpleasant memories with... guys like you. And my friend is interested in you, so..."

Interested in me? Was Shane's friend a girl and he wanted to bring us together? But he didn't seem like a couple-maker. And why would he talk with his friend about me? "Like me?" I asked, wondering what kind of memories they made with guys 'like me'.

"Yes. Confident and handsome."

"Oh." I just said. If that was how I came across to other people, I must have really reached my goal.

"You don't have to of course but..."

"No, it's cool. So, are we going?"

"Sure." He said and smiled at me.

We walked to the canteen and he apologized again for being so unfriendly all the time. When we stood there and waited I wondered who this friend was. Nate saw us and came over to tell me he would eat with a few guys he got to know. I just nodded and thought it was probably good he wasn't there. I mean, I had no idea what the next hour would bring.

"So where is your friend?" I asked.

"He should be here any minute." Shane said and a second later: "Here he is." He pointed at... my jaw dropped. OH MY GOD!

He didn't mean that absolutely gorgeous guy? The one with dark hair, handsome face, nice body - not extremely beefy but muscular - and a bit taller than me. And he said he had bad memories with handsome guys? This guy was incredible. But on second look, he didn't look arrogant or very confident.

"You mean... him?" I asked.

"Yes." Shane said with a smile that showed his love for his friend. And that's when I noticed I couldn't see his eyes. He wore sunglasses. Big, black sunglasses. In a building? Was he trying to look cool (which he did)? All the girls gave him at least a second look. And also some of the guys. But it was a little strange that he wore sunglasses. Did he have ugly eyes? I couldn't imagine it.

And then I felt really strange, a little nervous and I didn't know where that feeling was coming from. I felt like I knew him, had already seen him. But that was impossible. I didn't know anyone that gorgeous. And how should I know him?

And even if I knew him, why should I feel nervous? 'A past life?' I wondered and then shook my head. Nonsense. He probably just reminded me of someone I knew.

"Hey Joey!" Shane said with a loud voice. Joey smiled - and I thought I was going to melt. What a smile.

"Hi Shane, how was your day?" His voice was very comfortable and I had to stop myself from letting my imagination go wild. This wasn't good, was it?

"It was okay. This is Andrew. Andrew, this is my friend Joey."

"Nice to meet you." I said and held my hand out but Joey ignored it. His head was turned to my direction but I wasn't sure if he was looking at me.

"Is he really that good-looking?" Joey suddenly asked.

"Yes." Shane answered.

"Good." Joey said and then smiled again. "Are you holding out your hand?"

"Yes." I said.

"Sorry." He finally held out his hand and I took it. So he was blind? And that was why he wore sunglasses? They were both a little strange and I had many questions but we went to get some food first.

I thought Joey would need help but he managed to get his own food without any assistance and he walked normally and didn't bump into others. If he really was blind, how did he do that? Or could he 'feel' things like I did during fights?

We then sat on a table and for a few minutes we were all quiet. Shane just ate, Joey was still smiling at me but didn't say anything and I wasn't sure what I should do.

Joey was the first to open his mouth. "You must think we're the weirdest guys on campus."

"No, no. Of course not. You just... asked me to join you for lunch? That's not..." I said even though Joey was right. And I knew I didn't sound very convincing.

He grinned. "Liar."

I grinned back. "Okay, I admit it."

"I heard you both joined the martial arts club." He said.

"Yes. You can't believe how surprised I was when Shane bumped into me."

"Oh, I thought it was you that bumped into Shane?" Joey said and turned his head to look - look? - at Shane.

"Erm... no... I mean..." Shane stuttered and both Joey and I laughed. Shane blushed.

"Seems like we have two liars here." Joey said.

"I still don't really get why you wanted me to join you for lunch. I mean, it's great of course, but..."

"I told you Joey is interested in you." Shane said. "As soon as I told him I met a stupid guy named Andrew he got curious."

"Stupid guy?" I asked, mock angry. Shane just grinned.

"Interested... you mean..." I looked questioningly at Joey and then I remembered he couldn't see me.

"No I don't. I just wanted to meet the first guy Shane mentioned. We both don't have many friends anymore." Joey said.

"I see." I said, a little disappointed.

---oOo---

One thing I realized was that time passed incredibly fast at college. Everything was peaceful and I got to know Shane and Joey much better during the following weeks. We often ate lunch together and I came to like both of them a lot. They were fun, easy to talk to and mysterious. I never really asked Joey about his blindness and both of them, no, all of us had many secrets. We never talked about our childhoods as if we all had our own bad memories we didn't want to talk about. But we became friends and Joey intrigued me.

I often caught myself staring at him, wishing I could caress his cheek or kiss his beautiful lips and once I noticed how Shane looked at me with a thoughtful look. I held back of course, knowing that Joey wasn't interested in me that way. He had said so on the first day. But knowing it didn't stop me from thinking about him more and more, from dreaming about him - not only dirty dreams of course. Some of them were actually pretty scary and I wondered if it was my subconscious warning me from letting my feelings develop further.

Shane was still a little distant but he was beginning to open up. We often went to training together and he talked more, we joked and had fun.

I also spent a lot of time with Nate and met some of his friends. But they often made jokes about gays and I just couldn't laugh with them.

On weekends I always went home and spent a lot of time with Julian. My father and I talked more but I was still a bit distant with Jessica. She was nice and friendly but I wasn't sure how to treat her. Julian didn't seem to have the same problems. He treated my father as if he were his biological one. And I think that was good. Jessica, Julian and my dad really looked like a real family.

I also stood in contact with Nick. He was now in Florida and he told me that George had actually asked for a transfer to Florida which he got. Following Nick was somehow never an option for me and I thought that my feelings couldn't have been that strong.

We talked a lot and when I told him about Joey, he said I should go for it even though I tried to explain that it wasn't possible. He laughed and reminded me that I loved challenges. But turning a straight guy gay?

"You have to know that many guys assume they're straight and just ignore their feelings." He said, trying to convince me to make a move.

I also did well in classes and wouldn't have minded if everything just continued to be so peaceful. But life never was that easy. Especially mine. There seemed to be always something that disturbed my peace. The disturbance on the other hand made one cherish the good, quiet times more.

The day that changed everything began really nice. Oh, wrong, the day was nice and the following week as well but it was the start of trouble.

It was a mild autumn day and I was sitting on a bench, reading a book when I saw Joey walk by really close. He looked mesmerizing with his hair fluttering in the wind.

Suddenly he stopped, only two metres away from me. "Andrew?" He asked.

"H... how did you know?"

"I felt your stares."

"No way."

"Are you sitting on a bench?"

"Yes. You want to sit down?"

"Sure." He said and then sat next to me - very close. Our arms touched when I moved just the tiniest bit.

We were both quiet but then he said: "I wish I could see."

"Oh..." I didn't know what to say. He looked a little sad and I wished I could put my arm around him to tell him I was there to support him.

"You don't have to say anything. I accepted my blindness. It's just that today it's exactly three years since I became blind."

"You could see before that?"

"Yes."

"What happened? No, I'm sorry. You don't have to tell me."

"I don't mind. I like you." He said and my heart beat like crazy. Did he know what he did to me??

"I like you, too." I said and in my ears it sounded a little too eager. Hopefully he didn't notice.

"Thanks. Well, it happened when I was fifteen. Car accident. And the glass hit my eyes. They also had to fix my face up."

"Oh. I'm sorry." Fix his face up? Did that mean plastic surgery?

"It's ok. At first I thought it was punishment." He said and I wondered why he suddenly told me all this.

"Punishment for what?"

"I was an evil kid."

"No way." I couldn't believe Joey thought of himself as evil.

"Yes. I'll tell you some other time. Now you. Anything interesting in your life?"

"Hm, my mother died four years ago but I have a great family now. My father married a woman. She has a kid, a boy. And he is... aww, he is just sooooooooo cute!"

He chuckled. "Must be great to have a brother."

"Yes. I was really lonely these last four years. Actually my whole life. But a lot has changed."

"Changes. Yes, that's the word." He looked sad for a moment but then brightened up. "Want to go out sometime?"

"Sure. You mean just us?"

"Why not?" Wow, when we went out it was always with Shane.

"Cool. What should we do?"

"Hm, how about dinner at some restaurant and then we'll see." He suggested.

"That would be great."

"You will be gone this weekend?"

"Yes."

"Ok. How about Thursday evening?"

"It's a date."

"Is it?"

"Oh, oups. I'm sorry. I didn't mean... I mean I know you're not interested in me like that. How stupid of me. Gosh, and now you know. Ah, sorry, I hope you don't mind that I think of you like that..." I stopped my mouth from babbling out more nonsense and I felt how I blushed.

He chuckled. "It's alright. I lied. Seems like there were three liars at the table. It's a date. If you want."

"Of course."

"Cool. Around five?"

"Sure. See you."

"Bye." He said and then got up.

I sat on the bench a few more moments. I had a date! My first date in my whole life! With the greatest guy on earth! I still couldn't believe it.

---oOo---

That was chapter six. Seems like he's completely over Nick... I hope you enjoyed reading it. I'd love to hear what you think. You can contact me at azulasn@yahoo.com

Azula