Hmm, this came out much sooner than I expected. Not a very exciting chapter, but hey, it happens. :) I'm trying to get this story out quickly, to please my dear readers, one of whom is quite possibly tearing her hair out. Hi Red!! Thanks as always to David and Nifty, and to everyone who's given me feedback including Stacia, Red, Aph, Ann, Elly, LJ and Sophie. It is sooooo appreciated.
DISCLAIMER: I am in no way affiliated with the real people mentioned herein. This is fiction; it implies NOTHING.
In addition to this, you should be reading: "A Love Like This", "A Tale of Two Boybands", "Little White Lies", "Hide In Plain Sight", "Chances Are", "Porcelain", "Nsync: Lance n JC", "A Little Bit of Love", and so many more. Don'tcha just LOVE this archive? I do!
~NO PAINLESS WAY~ Chapter 7
"I walked beside the evening sea And dreamed a dream that could not be; The waves that plunged along the shore Said only: 'Dreamer, dream no more!'"
- George William Curtis
Diane Bass sipped her coffee, hardly tasting it. She pat Lynn's hand comfortingly, and was answered with a forced smile.
"Lynn, God will watch over Justin. We have to keep faith and believe that he'll be returned to us."
Mrs. Harless sighed wearily. "I'm trying, Diane. That hope is the only thing keeping me alive and sane right now."
"You're doing fine. I wish I had your kind of strength...if something like this happened to Lance I wouldn't be holding myself together half so well." She shuddered. "If it's any comfort, it can't get worse. This is the most horrible thing a mother can possibly go through."
Lynn nodded slowly.
"That doesn't help at all, does it?"
"No. But thank you for trying. It's just...nothing can help. Nothing will be alright again until I have my baby back."
Diane's heart ached for her friend, inconsolable as any woman in her postion would be. And for J.C., who paced restlessly in the living room, waiting and hoping, as they all were, for the phone to ring and a stranger's voice to end this nightmare. For the boys, all sick with worry for their little brother. For everyone, Diane included, who loved Justin and couldn't conceive of a world without him.
Detective Larsen had become a familiar face in the house; he was now questioning the 'Nsync bodyguards in the dining room. The boys had had a lot of different security people over the years, but those who had come had all been with their charges for over two years. Each was paid to take risks, blows and even bullets for any of the five singers, but they were each specifically assigned to one - Lonnie to Justin, Randy to Lance, Todd to Chris, Eric to J.C. and Mike to Joey. This system made things easier, especially on those rare occasions when the group was separated. Each was extremely dedicated and protective of his charge.
Diane suddenly smiled. "Remember when you and Lonnie first met?"
Lynn chuckled, grateful for a good memory. Three years earlier, when 'Nsync had been doing shows in Europe, both she and Diane had still travelled with the boys during tours, a practice they'd stopped only recently. Lynn had had to return to Florida for a few weeks, and flew to Germany afterwards earlier than she'd been expected to, intending to surprise Justin.
She'd gotten as far as the hotel floor where the boys were staying; halfway down the hallway Lynn was stopped by an enormous black man demanding to know who she was and how she'd gotten there. As Lynn searched her messy purse for her wallet and driver's license, the man calmly informed her that she was not the first lady to give the 'oh-I'm-Justin's-mom' excuse to try to get past security.
Just then Justin had come out of his room and, upon seeing his mother, ran over. When he got closer Lonnie effortlessly picked up the fifteen-year-old and protectively placed his charge behind him. The boy had giggled insanely at this.
"Lonnie, it's okay. This is my mom."
The man had been very embarassed and apologetic, but Lynn was touched by how genuinely caring and concerned he was for her son, and they had been close friends ever since. Lonnie was part of the Timberlake/Harless family as well as the 'Nsync family.
Randall Timberlake and his wife Lisa had arrived as well. Justin's dad had tried to comfort his ex-wife, but was just as distraught and terrified as she was. Lisa wasn't doing well either; like Paul, she loved Justin as though she was his natural parent. She and Randall were out with an officer searching Justin's favorite places around Orlando, more to keep them occupied than anything else.
Paul was in the living room with J.C. - two of Justin's three dads keeping a silent vigil by the phone. Joey was in the family room with Detective Murray, going through pages of names of people 'Nsync knew and worked with, past and present, looking for possible suspects. Chris was upstairs, probably either pacing the corridors or beating himself over the head. Lance was asleep; according to Chris he'd had a terrible dream that morning.
Diane frowned. //My poor baby.//
She knew that Lance didn't have nightmares often, but when he did they really shook him up. Like when his paternal grandmother died...no, she didn't want to think about that, or what the memory's events could mean. There were other problems at hand. ------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Hello?"
"Korman, it's Elwood. I know that now that you've been paid you probably want to move on, but I'd like you to stay in Orlando for a while."
Korman gripped the cell phone, his hands suddenly sweating. "Um, I can do that. Could I ask why, sir?"
"Well, I'm a little worried about the boy. He's a strong little thing and I don't think he'd try to hurt himself, but I want to be safe. I'm going to tell him that if he ever attempts such a thing one of his bandmates will suffer for it. As you know, I do not like to lie. So I'll need you standing by for a while just in case he decides to test me. Also I'll have another assignment for you soon..."
Korman shivered, though the room was insulated from the damp air outside. "'Suffer for it'? You mean, you might need me to kill one of them? Sir, I don't think-"
"You'll think what I tell you to think, Korman." The voice grew menacing. "Now, you did a good job this time, but that doesn't mean our business is concluded. I don't know when it was that you began to develop a conscience, but I warn you - such a thing is not useful in your line of work. This is no different than the dozens of other assignments you've handled. Professional kidnappers and mercenaries do not need guilt, understand?"
Korman swallowed. "Yes, sir, you're absolutely right. I'll stay as long as you need me to."
The voice grew pleasant. "Good man. I assure you, your reward will be well worth it."
Korman debated whether or not he should ask how Justin was, if he really wanted to know, but Elwood decided for him by hanging up without another word, as he always did. Korman was partly relieved, not wanting to think about that sweet boy, trapped in that eerily beautiful mansion with no hope of escape. Elwood had never said why he wanted the teenager and Korman had never asked, but the greedy look in the man's eyes as he'd received his package offered a few possiblities.
//Stop it! Don't think about it! The boss is right, this is no time to develop a conscience. In this line of work that would be death.//
Korman fumbled for the phone and dialed, suddenly needing to hear his wife and daughter's voices. He prayed they wouldn't hear the shaking in his. ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brian Littrell's car came to a screeching halt in front of the large Carter home. The white house had a gorgeous view overlooking a private beach, but Brian didn't stop to enjoy it as he charged inside and up the long staircase. Nick's bedroom was the second room on the left, and Brian stepped through the open doorway, breathing heavily.
Jane Carter sat on the edge of the bed, arms wrapped tightly around her oldest son. She gently rocked him as he whimpered, worry painting the blue eyes she and most of the family shared. When Brian came into her sight she looked relieved, and motioned him inside.
"I got here as fast as I could. Jane, what's wrong with Nick?" The panic in Brian's voice was obvious.
She looked at him helplessly. "He woke up screaming. I've been trying to calm him down, but he asked for you. That's why I called."
Brian nodded. Jane didn't know about what Lou had done to Nick, which was most likely what the nightmare had been about.
"Can I talk to him alone?"
She looked at Nick, who wordlessly agreed. Jane kissed her son and told him she'd be right downstairs. With a grateful smile at Brian, she left the room, shutting the door behind her.
Brian sat where Jane had been and pulled his best friend and heart's desire into a comforting hug. Nick was still shaking and crying, but he was calm enough to smile weakly. He greeted his bandmate the way he always had after waking from nightmares.
"Hey Frick. I'm okay."
Brian drew back to look at Nick's flushed face. "I wish I could believe that, Frack. You don't look okay. You wanna tell me what the dream was about?"
Nick's eyes looked like they wanted to refuse, as Nick always did, to discuss this. But the boy sighed wearily.
"It was like the ones I used to have. At least, it was, until the ending...God, I thought they'd stopped! Why won't they go away? Why do they make me relive it?"
Brian took the blond's trembling hands into his own. "I hate to say it, Nicky, but maybe because you haven't talked about them. With us, I mean, someone besides Dr. Sadler."
"Yeah, maybe."
"You finally ready to tell me?"
Nick's and Brian's eyes locked. Reassured by the love and concern he saw there, Nick looked back with trust. "Okay. I'll try."
Brian smiled encouragingly. "I'm right here, Nicky. You're safe with me."
The blond took a deep breath. "The dream's usually the same every time. I'm in a dark room, and I'm so terrified that I want to run, but there are no doors. Then I see myself, only I'm younger, about fifteen, I think. Then suddenly Lou's there...he can't see me, but he sees the younger me, ya know, and he pushes me onto this bed that's there and..."
Nick squeezed his eyes shut, overwhelmed by the memory of the times this had happened. Times when he'd been wide awake.
"It's okay, Nicky. It's over."
"...and he starts touching me everywhere, and trying to stick his tongue in my mouth. I feel so sick and I keep begging him to stop, but he just keeps telling me to relax. Whenever I pull away or try to fight, he threatens to tell you guys about what a little slut I am, and says that'll end the group and I'll never see you all again..."
"Oh, Nicky..." Brian took Nick into his arms, gently rubbing his back as the teenager continued bravely.
"...Lou takes my clothes off and he keeps touching me...you know, down there, with his fingers and his mouth. And I'm crying so hard I can barely breathe and he won't stop he would never stop..."
Nick sobbed for a minute, fighting for composure as Brian rocked him, the older man weeping silently.
"And when he's done with me he leans over and just stares at me, like he always did. And in the dream I'm watching all this, I'm only a few feet away but I can't move, and I can't say anything. Usually then I wake up, but this morning I just closed my eyes, trying to block it all out. When I opened my eyes and looked at the bed, it wasn't me there anymore...it was Justin."
"Oh, Nicky, that makes sense. You're worried about Justin, like we all are, scared about what happened to him. So your mind projected him into the worst place you could think of - Lou's hands."
It made perfect sense, but Nick shook his head fervently.
"That's just it, Frick. When Justin was there instead of me, it wasn't Lou with him."
Brian frowned at Nick's confused face. "It wasn't? Who was it?"
"I don't know! I've never seen him before."
"This really has you freaked out, doesn't it? The dreams about Justin?" Brian asked softly.
Nick nodded. "Bri, can we go see J.C. and the guys today? I dunno how, but maybe we can help."
"Sure. We'll go as soon as you're ready."
Nick hugged his best friend.
"Thanks, Bri. Be right back." Nick leaped out of bed and headed to the bathroom.
Brian looked casually around the messy bedroom, smiling. No matter how often Jane cleaned it, give Nick five minutes home and it looked like a hurricane had been through it. Well, Brian reasoned, teenagers' rooms are supposed to be messy, at least a little.
//Not Lou? But who else would it be? Maybe it doesn't mean anything, maybe it was a person who doesn't even exist.//
Nevertheless, Brian's instincts thought otherwise. As his gaze fell on one of Nick's sketch pads, his eyes lit up.
//It's worth a try.//
~to be continued~ Questions, comments (no flames) to DaraLynn at DaraLynn_writings@hotmail.com