Okay, I got an e-mail which pretty much made me decide to ditch my last stories and start this one. I know you'll hate me, but I have a feeling more people would go along with this plot than the last one.
Okay, PLEASE e-mail me comments and suggestions. Believe it or not, but I hope this one will make it past two installments. And read my other stories!!! The Day Before Tommorow, At the Beginning with You, Rain, and Still Every Time!
There's a rather disturbing dream in here, so just bare with me as I try to devlop the plot more completely, and work to get Brian and Nick together. Thanks for the support.
Thank you goes out to one person, and you know who you are. I needed to get focused on one story, and I'm feeling like this one is the easiest of any of mine to write.
Gking0300@aol.com Boygod85@hotmail.com Gking03@yahoo.com
Disclaimer: this is a complete work of fiction, this is not a representation of the actual sexual orientation of any of the backstreet boys.
Before the Storm (3)
Nick awoke and he squinted as his eyes adjusted to the darkness of the room. Lying back, he felt the body resting next to him, the man's chest rise and fall against him, the man's arms wrapped around him, holding them close together. Closing his eyes again, he felt the warm feeling of his breath against the back of his neck. Shifting a little, Nick awkwardly turned his head back to watch him sleep.
He was beautiful, his long lashes framed his closed eyes and his features were still gorgeous even in the faint morning light. He shifted in his sleep, and Nick moved closer to him. Gently, he placed his lips against the man's, the contact making his body ache with desire. Pressing himself closer, Nick forced the man's lips apart and kissed him deeply, invading his tounge quickly into the man's mouth. Drawing back, he watched the man's body stir and his eyes open. "Nick?"
The man's eyes opened fully to reveal a beautiful shade of shocking emerald green. "So it wasn't a dream," he said softly as Nick pulled away from the kiss.
Nick shook his head and smiled. "Nope, I'm for real."
"It's been so long, I've wanted this, I mean us, forever," he said gently trailing a finger across Nick's flawless face.
Nick closed his eyes and surrendered to the gentle touch. "I thought you said being with me would be like being with your brother."
Kevin traced his index finger down Nick's cheeks and massaged the skin behind his neck. "I was wrong."
Kevin pulled Nick on top of him. "I love you Nick," he said as he looked up into the eyes of the man above him and was suddenly filled with the desire to live. "I've never been happier in my entire life."
Nick smiled down on his new lover. "I love you too Kevin Richardson, more than anything."
Brian felt Dawson's head lean against his shoulder, but he was too preoccupied to notice his boyfriend falling asleep. Oddly, his eyes were fixed upon the man across the room. His beautiful blond hair fell perfectly in front of his deep and intriguing eyes dispelling the childish air he had about him less than a year ago.
Nick had a cruelly fitting black silk shirt on and stonewashed jeans, a sharktooth necklace hugged his neck and his new tatoo stood out against his pale skin. Brian's eyes drank in the sight before him, running his gaze over Nick's face. The babyfat had drained from his cheeks and face leaving him with smooth, yet formed features and his blue eyes had changed to a silver-gray over time.
Nick was a man now, not the little boy Brian had rocked to sleep on their first tour. Frick and Frack were still there, but Nick had changed and was still changing fast.
"Brian, you okay?"
Brian looked over at AJ and glanced back at Nick, deep in conversation with Kevin. "I'm fine Aje, just a little spaced out recently. I'm just really tired."
AJ nodded and looked back down at the papers in front of him, then back up at Brian.
Across the room, Kevin leaned in to hear something Nick was saying, and he smiled back seductively, his perfect teeth framed by ruby red lips. Nick smiled up at Kevin and whispered the rest of his phrase to which Kevin laughed out loud and leaned back. Whispering something back, Nick flashed a grin and rested his hand on Kevin's leg.
Brian clenched his fists and cursed himself inside. Here I am sitting with a gorgeous guy who loves me and puts his life on the line for me, and I'm jealous of my cousin and his boyfriend. Brian shook his head and felt tears coming to the corners of his eyes. But I want Nick. I want him so much it hurts.
"So what do you want to do tonight?" Kevin whispered down to Nick who pulled his hand back from Kevin's leg slowly, running his fingers along the inseam of Kevin's pants.
"Dinner? A movie?"
"Sure babe, anything you want," Kevin murmered to his boyfriend. Nick looked up and smiled, his eyes sparkled mischeviously.
"Maybe we can do a lap dance or two after?"
Kevin moved uneasily in his seat. "Stop it honey, you're getting me all hot and bothered."
"That's the point," Nick said grinning. "Just wait, I'll help you release some of that energy later tonight."
"That's not helping either Nickolas," Kevin warned.
Nick squeezed Kevin's leg making him jump. "I know."
Brian lay naked on top of the sheets, the thin sheen of sweat shined in the afternoon light. A damp towel from the shower lay next to the bed, and his hair hung limp and darkened from the water. Moving a little, he shivered at the steady cold stream from the air conditioner. Getting up slowly, he turned the air off and stretched next to the window, his skin shone a peach color from the sunlight, his hair becoming an illuminated gold color.
He pulled a pair of worn jeans from the floor and threw on a gray sweater, admiring his complexion in the mirror. Running a hand through his damp hair, he let the darkened locks fall back into place on his head. Returning to the bed, he fell back and stared at the ceiling, trying to make sense of the aimless wandering designs of plaster. Groaning, he turned over and shoved his face into the pillow, Nick's beautiful face coming back from the depths of his mind.
But Nick's taken
Taken by my cousin
If only I'd have moved faster
But how could I have known?
Pulled down into a turmoil of feelings, Brian held his head and pulled his legs to his chest.
"Brian?"
Brian slowly uncurled form his ball and looked up, the beautiful elegant form moved slowly across the room.
"Are you okay?"
Brian flinched a little and sat up, seeing stars momentarily from his close encounter with the pillow and pressure against his eyes. "What do you want," he whispered almost inaudibly."
The bed moved a little as he sat down. "I want to know why you're curled up in a ball on the bed holding your head like it's going to explode."
Brian smiled slightly as he realized what a strange sight he must have cut. "Things are just catching up with me, I'm putting myself through emotional hell for things I didn't do, for chances I couldn't take."
"Why?"
Such a simple question, but such a long, painful and complicated answer. "I don't know, I just don't know anymore," Brian said hanging his head. He shivered a little despite the warming sunshing pouring through the window.
"Brian you know you can talk to me whenever you have problems, I've told you that so many times."
Brian shook his head and stood up abruptly. "No, you don't understand, you can't understand this time."
"Why?"
That question again. "Because it would just mess things up, it would just ruin things between us."
"Why?"
"Nick leave."
Nick turned from Brian, hiding the pain and question in his face. "When you've decided to be a human, call me," he said harshly, slamming the door behind him.
Brian stood next to the bed for a few seconds, letting Nick's words sink in slowly. Falling to his knees, he bent his head and ground it into the floor, letting his stray tears of frustration soak into the carpeting. "Why Nick, why does it have to be so hard?"
Nick caught his breath quickly and slammed his back into the wall as orgasm took over his body. "Kevin, Kevin I'm gonna cum," he managed to choke out quickly.
The dark haired man felt Nick's body jerk under his touch and tasted the bittersweet taste of his cum flow into his mouth. Swallowing, he licked his now white coated lips and kissed Nick's stomach delicately, slowly running his tounge up and down the sweat sheened skin.
Nick let out a fast breath and pulled Kevin's mouth up to hi, kissing him deeply, tasting the traces of cum still in his mouth. Kevin shivered as he felt Nick's tounge dance inside his mouth, tracing impossibly patterns on the roof of his mouth.
Nick let his hands roam down Kevin's sweaty body, reveling in the afterglow they shared, feeling Kevin's bodywarmth engulf them. "You're a good fuck," he said playfully.
Kevin smiled up at Nick, rubbing the small of his back gently with his index and middle finger. "Ditto."
Nick relaxed as he finally felt his body return to normal and pressed himself close to Kevin. "I love you baby."
Kevin stole another kiss from Nick's lips. "I love you too cutie-pie."
Nick sucked gently on the skin of Kevin's neck, feeling his warm breath tickle his scalp. "Everything about you is so, well, cute," Nicks said as Kevin shifted slightly underneath him.
"Mm-hm," Kevin said softly, luxuriating in the feeling of Nick's warm mouth on his bare skin.
Nick watched as Kevin's eyelids drooped, and he slowly drifted off to sleep. In the half-darkness of the hotel room, Nick Carter pulled a sweatshirt from the floor underneath the bed. Holding it close to his nose, he inhaled and smiled. A smell, comforting, yet somehow vaguely sexual.
As he fell asleep, he held the shirt close to his body, imagining how it would feel to be held by the only man he could truly love.
Brian awoked suddenly, the wall shivered slightly as something slammed into it at high speed.
"Kevin, Kevin, I'm gonna cum."
Brian sighed as he heard Nick's voice, high with tension and pleasure.
Turning over in bed, he pulled the pillow on top of his head, trying to block out the sounds drifting through the thin wall.
"Fuck it all," Brian said throwing the pillow across the room. "Why does my fucking boyfriend choose this day not to sleep here."
Turning over restlessly, he heard the muffled murmerings from next door. Getting up, he padded into the bathroom and ran some water from the faucet, the flourescent light flickered dimly and he shivered at the feeling of the cold tile beneath his feet.
Feeling a headache coming on, he opened the medicine cabinet door and pulled out a bottle of pills. After struggling breifly with the childproof cap, he removed to pills and popped them into his mouth. Sucking water directly from the tap, he swallowed and felt them travel down his throat to his stomach.
Looking back at the bottle, he swallowed two more. Feeling a calming warm feeling flow through his body, he set the pills down and examined his reflection in the distorted mirror. Turning to the side, he watched as his brown hair settled unconvincingly messy to one side. Turning the other way, he cursed silently to the darkened room.
Four more pills
Four more
Two more
Three more
Brian abruptly closed the medicine cabinet doors.
Like in a dream, one of the mirrored panel doors shattered, the image of the room distorted as tiny sharp shards of glass exploded outwards from the door, the front hung limp on it's chrome frame. Brian stepped back as the shrapnel seemed to expand in front of him, flying like razor sharp hail to pierce his hands and wrists.
Staggering backwards, his delayed senses registered pain all at once, his mind overlogged by the intense feelings transmitted by the nerves in his wrists.
Blood trickled down toward the door, staining the pale white tiles a dusty red shade. Falling to the floor, Brian winced as the side of his head made contact with the tile. Out of his one open eye, he watched as the rivulet of blood lazily wound it's way toward a standing pool of water next to the shower.
The blood mixed slowly with the clear water in a sickly swirl, tainting it a ruby red.
That's beautiful, Brian remembered himself thinking as he drifted off into unconciousness.
On a far hill, the trees bent with the morning dew heavy on their branches, the wind whistled down from the heavens to stir around the pine needles coating the forest floor. It stretched out like a desert, outcroppings of granite stuck out of the earth in odd angles, some red, some gray, some black.
They stood in a circle, their heads bowed to the earth as the rain started to fall down, dripping from the black umbrellas onto their raincoats.
One was tall, dark and handsome, his emerald green eyes shone like two bright stars.
Holding his a thin blond, his now wet hair plastered to his head.
Kneeling, a man wept silently, his sobs barely audible over the sound of the wind.
Two more stood near, their faces impassive, but eyes swollen showing their recent display of grief.
The rain increased in intensity and thunder cracked over them suddenly.
"It's time to go," the tall man said to the blond next to him, their interlaced fingers tightening their grip. "I know it's hard, but it's time to go."
The blond shook his hand loose and bowed next to the stone. Falling to his knees, he felt his tears hit the cold granite block and the rain water soak into the knees of his pants.
Placing his hand on the grave, he traced the letters on the simple tablet.
"Nick, it's so hard."
Nick turned to see Dawson's tear streaked face, water running in rivulets from his soaked hair, the usually bright and vibrant eyes toned a dull and weary shade.
The rain started sheeting down and lightning branched through the sky on the horizon.
Slowly, the five men left the graveyard, but the blond stood looking back to the simple marker of the man he had loved forever.
"Brian, come back," he whispered quietly. The rain momentarily let up to a gentle drizzle, and Nick almost thought he saw the sun throught he clouds.
But then he was gone, the rain poured down in a torrent, the graveyard returned to its desert landscape of green and grays.
"Brian."
5:27 AM
Nick sat straight up in bed, sweat in beads running down his forehead.
"Brian."
Getting out of bed, Nick padded quietly to the door and opened it slightly, the bright light from the hotel hallways blinded him momentarily. Closing his room door behind him, he walked to the adjoining suite, opening the door quietly.
The room was dark, the air still and moist like someone had just taken a shower.
"Brian?"
Nick pushed the door open and looked to the bed. The covers were rumpled, the sheets tangled and pushed down to the bottom of the bed. A pillow lay across the room, a picture frame knocked from the wall. Quietly, Nick approached the bathroom door and opened it.
In the dim light, Nick saw the dark ruby color of fresh blood against the pale white tiles. Rounding the corner to the sink, he silently cursed the sight in front of him.
The medicine cabinet was hanging limply off the wall, the mirrored doors hung barely to one bent hinge. Shards of mirror were strewn about the room. Bottles of pills had been haphazardly cleared from their neat positions in the cabinet, bottles lay all across the sink and floor.
But Brian.
Brian was as pale as the white tiles, the color completely drained form his skin. Tiny dots of blood shown bright from the lacerations of the mirror shards, a sickly comparison to the sterile white of the room.
Blood ran inbetween the tiles, forming a perfect grid of red liquid, not spattered messily like from a murder scene. Brian's eyes were shut tightly, his eyelashes fluttered gently as if he was asleep.
Nick bent down next to Brian and shook him gently, coaxing the man awake. Brian's eyes flickered and opened, the deep blue immediately shocked Nick.
"Nick?"
Nick couldn't help himself as tears poured from his eyes. Bending down, he placed a kiss on Brian's forehead, trying to wipe some of the blood from his hands and face.
"Brian why, why?"
Brian wrapped an arm around Nick and smiled weakly. "I love you so much."
Nick looked down at Brian again, beautiful despite the glass, pills, and blood strewn across the room. Slowly, Nick bent down again and kissed Brian, this time on his lips. Brian's eyes opened wide as he felt himself return the kiss. But something about it had meaning, more than Brian felt for Dawson, or Nick felt for Kevin.
It was strange somehow, sitting in the middle of a bloody room, a weakened man lay on the floor, his best friend holding him close. Nick smiled through his tears and held Brian's head on his lap.
"I love you too."
TBC. . .