Begin Anew
Copyright 2000 By Francis O'Ratigan. All rights reserved. With the exceptions of short excerpts for critical reviews, no part of this work may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission in writing from the Author.
This story is complete fiction. This story in no way implies the ACTUAL sexual orientation or beliefs of Actual living people. In other words FICTION!!
Any comments are welcome. Good or bad. Feel free to e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com
Chapter 2
"What's wrong Jas?" asked Justin Timberlake.
"When are you coming back to town?" Jason asked.
"That is why I called you. I am on my way from the airport now," Justin said. Jason could almost see the grin on Justin's face. A surge of fear welled up inside Jason.
"Umm, Justin?" he asked.
"Yea Baby what is it?" Justin asked.
"He's back," Jason said. There was a silence on the other end of the line. "Justin?" he asked.
"When did he get back into town?" Justin asked in a small voice.
"About an hour ago," Jason said. "And Justin?"
"Yea?" asked Justin.
"I think he knows about us," Jason said trying not to sob into the phone but failing.
"I wish I was there holding you right now," Justin said in a sad voice.
"We are going to have to talk to him sooner or later," Jason said wiping the tears from his face.
"Do you still love him?" Justin asked.
"I've never stopped loving him and you know that," Jason said bluntly. He could almost see Justin frown. "I better let you go so I can talk to him," Jason said into the phone. "I love you Justin."
"I love you too Jas," whispered Justin as the phone went dead. Jason dropped the phone on the counter and pushed open the door that led to the dinning room. Kevin was sitting in a chair staring at Jason. Jason sat down across from him. He could see that Kevin had been crying. "Kevin?" asked Jason. "Please say something."
"How long have you and Justin been together?" he asked. His voice was calm with only a trace of anger in it.
"A year after you left, about a month after Ben died. His Cancer came back," Jason answered looking directly into Kevin's eyes. Kevin's eyes watered up for just a moment at the news of Ben's passing. Than his eyes turned hard again.
"Well at least you waited a year to jump his bones! " he threw at Jason. Jason stood up and walked to the window and looked out it. "Well?" Kevin said, his voice raising. "Don't you have anything to say in your deffence?"
Jason turned back around glaring at Kevin. "NO!" he shouted at Kevin. Kevin backed up. "You do not get to play the injured party here!" Jason shouted at Kevin. "You left me! Remember? I reached out to you the morning our lives went to hell and YOU pushed me away! You walked out of our lives that morning and you didn't look back! Oh yea you did leave that pathetic excuse of a letter. You fucking Coward!" Kevin sat back down and looked at his hands. "For three years and three months to the day you were on your selfish I need to find my fucking self mission. You decide that you no longer want to be a part of my life. You decided to break off all contact with me! And when you did that you lost all of your rights and claim to me!" Jason was sobbing now. All of the anger and sadness that he had built up over the last three years had finally reached to the point of eruption. "And now here you are just expecting me to take you back. I mean did you ever stop to think that just maybe I don't want to be a part of your life?" Jason could see those words rock Kevin right to the heart. Kevin winced at the words. Jason was right! What if he didn't want Kevin back? What if Kevin had lost Jason forever? Suddenly Kevin was angry too. Angry at himself for leaving his husband. And angry at Jason for cheating on him. So he lashed out the only way he knew. An all out attack on Jason.
"I've never stopped loving you Jason!" Kevin yelled back. Jason stood there with a shocked look on his face. "And I didn't fuck around on you either! I was faithful to our wedding vows! Can you say the same?"
"Faithful to our vows? What about standing by me in sickness and in health, in good times and bad times. For richer and poorer? You say you were faithful to our vows. Which ones Kevin? The ones you choose to be inportant to you? Well you can tell me that until hell freezes over and it wont change a fucking thing! You left me!" sobbed Jason. Kevin got up and moved to him and tried to pull him in a hug. "Don't touch me!" Jason shouted at Kevin as he shoved him away. "Just keep you fucking hands off of me!" Jason ran passed Kevin and ran upstairs slamming the door. Throwing himself on the bed sobbing loudly. This wasn't the way he wanted to handle it. He wanted to remain in control. But he had turned into a sobbing vulnerable child. Someone that Kevin could hold and comfort. He didn't want that right now. Right now all he wanted to do is shout and scream and hurt Kevin as much as Kevin had hurt him. Kevin stood at the door way looking down at his distraught lover. His heart went out to him and he crossed over to the bed and laid down beside him and pulled him close. Jason tried to get loose but Kevin held him close. Finally Jason stopped struggling and fell into a dreamless sleep. **********************************************
Justin's rental pulled up to the front of the house. He shut off the car and climbed out of the car. He walked wearily up the steps of the Mansion. The door flew open and Johnny came running out. "Hi Johnny!" Justin said grinning from ear to ear.
"Hi Uncle Justin!" Johnny said grinning too. Justin leaned down and hugged the child. "Dad came home!" he said in an excited tone.
"Where is he now?" asked Justin. He looked up intime to see Kevin walk out onto the front porch. "Hi Kevin, it's good to see you," he said looking at him square in the eyes.
"Hey yourself Curly," Kevin said in a neutral voice. "Um Johnny can you go see if your father is awake?" Johnny took off upstairs leaving the two adults to talk. "You seem to be doing all right," Kevin commented. "I was sorry to hear of Ben's passing."
"That has been a little over two years ago. I still miss him but I've moved on," Justin said as he walked closer to Kevin.
"Moved on is right!" Kevin said harshly. "Moved on with my man!" Justin jerked his head towards him. Kevin punched him right in the nose. Justin fell back holding his nose trying to stop the flow of blood that was pouring from it. Kevin shook his right hand from the pain of hitting Justin. Justin to his credit stood up and walked away and sat back dwon
"Don't start Kevin!" Justin warned.
"Don't start what?" Kevin shouted. "You've been screwing around with my husband!" He walked to the edge of the porch. "You think that just because I left that Jason was fair game?"
"God Kevin!" Justin shouted back as he tilted his head back to try and stop the bleeding. "You are such an ASS!! Do you have any idea what hell Jason went through when you walked out on him?"
"Shut up Justin!" Kevin shouted at him. "Don't tell me what Jason whent through!"
"No! you shut up Kevin!" shouted a voice from the door way. Justin and Kevin looked back intime to see Jason walk out. Jason looked over at Justin and saw the blood on his face. "What the fuck did you do to Justin?" Jason shouted. He walked up to Kevin and slapped him in the face hard. So hard that it jerked Kevin's face around leaving a red mark on his cheek. Kevin to his credit just glared at Jason not raising his hand against him not even to rub his sore cheek. "I told you before that you don't get to play the injured party in this! Justin was there for me during a time that I needed him. And I sure the hell didn't see you around!"
"That is cruel Jason, even for you," Kevin said softly.
"Well the truth fucking hurts doesn't it?" Jason hurled at him. Kevin swore and grabbed Jason and led him around the back of the house and to the gazebo and sat him down on the rocker. Jason turned around and faced the other way.
"I love you you stubbon Jack ass!" Kevin said to him with his voice wavering. "I can't live with out you babe." Jason shoulders started to shake and his head lowered. Finally the sobs he had been holding back for over three years came. They came in huge racking sobs. Kevin wrapped arms around Jason and pulled him close.
"Why?" wailed Jason. "Why did you leave me?" He started pounding on Kevin's chest. Kevin grabbed his wrists to prevent him from hitting him. "Why Kevin?" Jason pleaded again. "I missed you so much!" Kevin just held Jason until he stopped crying. Jason let out a huge sigh and at back against the seat. "Now what are we going to do?"
"I don't know Jas," Kevin whimpered. Clearing his throat, "I do know this, I love you Jason Richardson. I've never stop loving you. I want to be a part of you and Johnny's life. Please Jas," he pleaded. He reached out and
wiped the tears from Jason's face. Jason let out a groan and leaned into the touch. Jason face slowly moved towards Kevin's. Kevin's face moved slowly towards his. As their lips touched it was like electricity raging through them. Kevin let out a small sob and grabbed Jason and pulled him close and tight driving his tongue down Jason's throat. Jason reached around and grabbed Kevin by the back of the head running his hand through his hair. Time stood still for the two lovers. At least for now they were content to hold eachother.
Justin walked into the house and followed the sound of Johnny's laughter and Scrappy's barking. True to form he found them plopped down infront of the large screen TV playing video games. "Hey Johnny!" Justin exclaimed. Johnny put the game on pause and walked over to his adopted Uncle. "So how do you feel about Kevin being back home?"
Johnny looked down at his feet not wanting to talk to him. Justin got down to Johnny's level and took the childs chin in his hand and gently pulled his head up so that he was looking into Johnny's eyes. He was not suprised to see anger in them. "Oh Johnny," Justin whispered. Johnny fell into Justin's arms crying. "Let it all out buddy." After a few moments Johnny sniffled loudly and wiped his nose on his sleeve. (Typical kid move.) Justin smiled and handed him a tissue. "So you want to talk about it?" Justin asked softly. Johnny shook his head no. "Ok, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. But some time you are going to have to talk to him about it."
"Why did he leave?" Johnny asked in a angry tone. "Didn't he love me?"
"Don't ever think that Kevin doesn't love you. He loves you very much. He just didn't know that you were back with Jason. If he did know--," Justin started.
"That is no excuse! He shoulda called us or e-mailed us or something. We don't live in the olden times anymore you know!" Johnny shouted at Justin. Justin choked back a laugh and Johnny glared at him. "He just didn't care about us any more!" Justin grabbed Johnny and pulled him in a hug.
"Oh Johnny," Justin whispered. "Kevin does love you and he cares very much about you and Jason. He just has a real messed up way of showing it." Justin stood up and carried Johnny up stairs and into his room. He laid the young boy in the bed and climbed in beside him and pulled him close. Johnny soon stopped crying and fell asleep in Justin's arms. Justin heard the back door shut and he untangled himself from Johnny and headed down stairs.
"You know that we still have a long road to follow," Jason said as he looked up into Kevin's eyes.
"I know that we do, and I am willing to do what is needed to repair our Marriage. After all we have Johnny to think about," Kevin said leaning down and kissing Jason again. "Speaking of Johnny, where is he?"
"He is up stairs asleep," Justin said as he walked into the kitchen. "You really have your work cut out Kevin."
"Why what is wrong with him?" Jason asked worried.
"He is very angry at Kevin for leaving. He is also very confused about why his father shows back in his life after three years of being gone. He is starting to wonder if Kevin really wants to be a father to him," Justin said bluntly. Kevin let out a small sob and sat down in a chair. Jason cradled his head against him. Justin caught this but controled himself and didn't say anything.
"God Jas!" Kevin sobbed. "What have I done?" Now it was Jason turn to gather Kevin up in his arms and comfort him. He made soft comforting noices in Kevin's ear. "I missed out on three years of Johnny's life! I will never get that back!" Kevin broke down again sobbing into Jason's shoulder.
Justin swore softly and stormed out of the house. Jason heard the car start up and the squeel of the tires.
"FUCK!!!" screamed Justin as he slammed his fist against the steering wheel.
"That Asshole shows up after three years and falls right back into Jason's arms and all is forgiven!" Justin reached the side gate and pushed the remonte to open the gate. He counted down the seconds before his cell phone rang. "What?" he bellowed in the air activating the phone.
"Justin!" Jason voice sounded over the speakers in the car. "Get your ass back up to the house now!"
"Why Jason?" sobbed Justin. "I mean he is back so why do you need me any more?" He knew that sounded mean but at this point he didn't care.
"Please Justin, you are upset and you shouldn't be driving right now," Jason pleaded with him.
"Yea Justin, please come up to the house and we will talk about it," Kevin voice came over the speakers too. Justin was mildly suprised that Kevin's voice actually sounded concerned.
"Phone off!" he ordered and the phone deactivated. He floored the accelerator and sped down the road.
"Shit Kevin!" shouted Jason. "He hung up on us." Jason slammed the phone down on the counter. "He is going to get himself killed." Kevin grabbed his hand and they headed out to the garage and into Jason's car. In about five minutes they were on their way to find Justin. The Butler would take care of Johnny and make sure he was all right.
"God Kevin," Jason said looking worried as they sped up the road. "I hope that he is all right."
"He shouldn't be driving in the mood he is in. God Jason I've really fucked things up by comming home," sobbed Kevin as he wiped the tears away from his face. They rounded the curb and Jason let out a yell. Kevin pulled off to the side of the road. Jason was out of the car running towards the overturned car. It was Justin's rental. It was on fire and Justin was slumped over in the seat.
"Justin!" Jason screamed banging on the window. Kevin pushed Jason out of the way and tried to open the door.
"Damm the door is jammed!" shouted Kevin. He drew back his hand and slammed it against the windshield. He glanced at the fire and noticed that it was getting closer to the gas tank. Jason came running over with a rock. Kevin took it from him and slammed it against the windshield and broke the glass. With the help of Jason they removed Justin from the wrek.
"Run!" shouted Jason as he and Kevin draped Justin's arms over their shoulders and took off running. The explosion of the car threw the trio ten feet into air and slamming them against the rock hard pavement. Jason let out a groan of pain. Kevin hit his head against the pavement and his eyes rolled back into his head.
After a few minutes of laying on the pavement Jason slowly got to his feet. He looked over at Kevin and saw that he was moving. He than looked at Justin and saw that he was still out like a light. He ran over to him and gently rolled him over to check him out. He checked for a pulse and breath sounds and heaved a sigh of reliefe.
"Is he all right?" Kevin coughed out.
"He is alive but as far as his injuries I don't know," Jason said. "Go back to our car and call for help." Kevin made his way back to their car and called for a fire truck, police and ambulance. After making sure help was on the way he made his way back Jason and Justin.
"How is he?" Kevin asked.
"Not good. His pulse has gotten real weak," Jason said. Frowning he checked the pulse again. "OH God! We're loosing him!"
Ok that is it for this install ment. Sorry for the cliffhanger. He he he
Tell me what you think!
e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com