Begin Anew
Copyright 2000 By Francis O'Ratigan. All rights reserved. With the exceptions of short excerpts for critical reviews, no part of this work may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission in writing from the Author.
This story is complete fiction. This story in no way implies the ACTUAL sexual orientation or beliefs of Actual living people. In other words FICTION!!
Any comments are welcome. Good or bad. Feel free to e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com
Chapter 3
"Come on Justin!" shouted Jason as he and Kevin performed CPR on him. "Live!" You could hear the screaming of the Ambulance and fire truck in the distance. Kevin was breathing oxygen into Justin. Jason was doing chest compressions.
"Check for a pulse Jason!" ordered Kevin. He was in full control mode just like he used to be when Jason was sick. Jason placed his fingers along the artery on Justin's neck. Kevin looked into the eyes of his lover. Jason's eyes lit up as he found Justin's pulse.
"I have a pulse!" he exclaimed as he sat back on his ankles wiping his brow.
Justin let out a racking cough as he tried to clear his lungs of the noxious fumes that invaded him. His eyes flew open and saw the Kevin was leaning over him. He tried to sit up but Kevin's hands restrained him.
"Woa there Curly," he said in a commanding voice. "You need to lie still. The Ambulance is on the way." Even now you could see the flashing red lights of the emergnecy vehicles approaching.
"I hurt," Justin gasped out still trying to sit up. "Let me up!" Kevin looked over at Jason for help. Jason knelt down and took Justin's head in his hand and forced him to look in his eyes.
"Justin Baby," he said in a soothing voice. Justin calmed down the minute he heard Jason's voice. "You need to lie still. You've been in an accident and we don't know if you have neck or back injuries. Will you lie still for me?" Justin's eyes filled with tears as he grabbed Jason's hand and held it tight. Kevin saw this and looked away with anger smoldering in his eyes. Jason grabbed Justin's hand and held it to his lips. "Please lie still Baby?" he pleaded. Justin nodded and closed his eyes.
"Don't let him go to sleep," Kevin instructed. Jason nodded as he gently stroked Justin's fore head. "You used to do that to me," Kevin said softly.
"I used to do alot of things for you Kevin," Jason shot back at him. "It is a shame that you didn't think of that before you left." Jason shot him a look that said. "Enough for now." Kevin stood up and walked over to the car.
"I'll be at home if you want to talk!" he hurled at Jason. Jason watched as he climbed into the car and drove off. Jason sighed and looked back down at Justin. He noticed that Justin's face was bruised from the force of the air bag. He also noticed the bruise from his seat belt too. Justin was going to be sore for a few days.
The ambulance drove up and the EMT jumped out and ran up to Jason and Justin. "What do we have?" asked the EMT. Jason quickly filled him in on Justin's injuries that he knew about.
Justin was taken to surgery. His liver was punctured and he had a few broken bones. Jason sat in the waiting room waiting for them to finish. A shadow passed in front of him. He looked up and saw the green eyes that once showed love but now only showed hurt and betrayal. "Why?" asked Kevin in a small voice. "Why did I have to fall in love with you?"
"I could ask you the same question Kevin," replied Jason. "I never stopped loving you." Kevin sighed an sat down next to Jason and wrapped his arms around Jason's shoulders. "So what was it like?" Kevin asked in a soft voice. Jason looked up at him. "You know, what was it like those three years I was gone?"
"It was hell," Jason said in an equally quiet voice. Kevin let out a small bitter laugh. "What was that for?" he demanded.
"So Justin wasn't as good as me huh?" he answered with a smirk. Jason tried to stand up but Kevin wouldn't let him. "Uh uh mister now it is my turn!" Jason glared at him for a few moments and thand nodded for him to continue. "You talk about me not being faithful to our vows well what about you?"
"What about me Kevin?" Jason asked back.
"You know damn well what I am talking about!" Kevin shouted at Jason.
"No I don't so why don't you fill me in on what the hell you are talking about?" Jason demanded.
"You have the nerve to act all innocent?" asked Kevin with his eyes wide open.
"Kevin just say what is on your mind so we can continue this talk," sighed an exasperated Jason.
"You're not going to admit to sleeping with Justin are you?" asked Kevin.
"Oh I will admit to sleeping with him," said Jason. "Now what is your definition of sleeping with someone?"
"Sex!" Kevin shouted. "I am talking about sex! And you know it! Now stop avoiding the question!" Jason started laughing and Kevin sat back shocked that Jason was just sitting there laughing. "What the hell is so fucking funny?"
"You sweetie!" giggled Jason. Kevin slumped down in the chair and pouted.
"I don't see what is so funny!" he grumbled. Jason leaned forward and kissed Kevin's pouty lips.
"I slept with him yes. But I didn't "SLEEP WITH HIM!" Jason explained to Kevin. "We didn't have Sex!" Kevin looked like he was going to pass out.
"But I thought, I mean I just assumed that you--, oh shit do I ever feel stupid," he moaned as he got up and walked across the room. "Are you sure you didn't have sex with him?"
"Yes Kevin," sighed Jason as he stood up and walked over to Kevin and wrapped his arms around Kevin's waist. "I think I would remember having sex with him.
"Than why the hell are you calling him sweetie and baby and saying that you love him? I mean I can see it your eyes that you feel something for him," asked Kevin with a frown on his face.
"Maybe I should start at the beginning so you will understand the realationship that Justin and I share," Jason said as he led Kevin back to his chair.
Two and half years ago
The ringing of the phone woke Jason up out of a dead sleep. Johnny was sick with a cold and he had kept Jason up for most of the night. He stumbled across the room and picked up the cordless and pushed the power button.
"This had better be really really good," he grumbled into the phone. He perked up when he heard sniffling on the other end. "Who is this? What's wrong?" he asked getting concerned.
"Jason?" sniffled Justin. "It's me do you have time to talk?" Jason immediatly grew concerned. It had been almost 6 months since he and Justin had talked.
"Yea sure Justin," Jason said growing more concern by the second. "What is wrong buddy?"
"It's Ben," Justin sobbed out. "His cancer is back."
"Oh God Justin," exclaimed Jason as he shut his eyes to stop the tears. "How bad is it?" He heard Justin burst into the series of sobs. "It's all right Justin. I am right here and I am not going anywhere. Take all the time you need." After a few moments Justin could talk again.
"It's really bad Jason," he said his voice stronger than before. "The docs say he only has about three months to live."
"Oh sweetie," Jason whispered as he wiped the tears from his face. "Were are you?"
"I'm at home with him," Justin said. "And Jason I know what you are thinking but the answer is no."
"Justin I'm coming down to see you, you need me with you, you need your friends at your side. Please don't shut me out like this," Jason sobbed into the phone.
"What about Johnny?" Justin asked. "He doesn't need this right now."
"Johnny is a lot stronger than you think. He would be really hurt if his uncle shut him out when you needed him," Jason insisted. He could hear Justin sighing as he thought about what Jason said.
"When can you get here?" Justin said.
"Yess!!" exclaimed Jason. Justin let out a small laugh. "Yea you know you could never say no to me."
"Yea yea, now tell me when you're bringing your sorry ass down here with my nephew," ordered Justin.
"We will be there by night fall," Jason said.
Eight hours later Justin met Jason and Johnny at the gate.
"Uncle Justin!" exclaimed Johnny as he threw himself into Justin's arms. Scrappy let out a happy bark as he jumped up on Justin too. Justin laughed as he tried to juggle a very happy 9 year old and dog. Jason finally came to the rescue and secured Scrappy. Justin set Johnny down and ruffled his hair. True to form Johnny swatted Justin's hand away and frowned up at him. Jason came around and pulled Justin into a hug.
"How are you doing?" he asked Justin. Tears started flowing from Justin as he buried his head in Jason's shoulder.
"I'm losing him Jason," he sobbed. "And there is nothing I can do about it!"
"Under stand that we will be with you through the end," Jason said as he looked into the eyes of Justin. "I mean it, you and Ben are all that matters right now." Tears were flowing down Jason's face too. Poor Johnny just stood there looking from one adult to another not quiet sure what to make of all of the comotion.
"Thank you Jas," Justin said as he wiped his face off. Jason leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek.
"No need to thank us. We are family and family pulls together in times like these," Jason replied as he guided Justin towards the exit sign.
"Where are you guys staying?" Justin asked.
"I still have the keys to Kevin's apartment," Jason said as he waved them infront of Justin.
"How is HE?" he asked as he grabbed the keys out of Jason's hand and threatened to throw them away. Jason stopped him from throwing them.
"I don't know Justin," whispered Jason. "I haven't heard from him in almost 6 months.
"Fucking ass hole!" Justin swore. Jason glared at him and glanced down at Johnny. Thank God he didn't hear Justin's outburst. "Sorry," mumbled Justin. "Well have you heard from Brian or any of the other guys?"
"No, it's like they've broken off all contact with me," Jason said bitterly.
"I guess they blame me for Kevin running off."
"Well I'm going to call them and chew them out!" Justin said as he reached for his cell phone. Jason's hand stopped him from doing that.
"Don't Justin," Jason begged.
"But they shouldn't treat you like that!" Justin insisted. "It is not your fault that Kevin left the fucking country. Where the hell is he any way?"
"Please Justin stop swearing!" Jason ordered. "I'm pretty sure he is in France somewhere."
"Well what are you waiting for?" Justin demanded. "Let's go and get him back!"
"NO!" Jason shouted.
"Why?" Justin demanded.
"Because Kevin has to come back on his terms. I'm not going to force him into something he doesn't want to do!"
"Man you are so stubborn!" grumbled Justin. By this time they had reached Justin BMW Roadster. Johnny's eyes lit up at the sight of it.
"I got shot gun!" squealed Johnny.
"Your dad is going to have to take the limo than," giggled Justin as he opened the door for Johnny and Johnny hopped in grinning like he had just won a million dollars. Justin hopped into the driver's seat and peeled wheels away from the curb.
"Justin!" shouted Jason. He could almost hear Johnny squeal with laughter. Scrappy barked at the car as it sped away. "Come on Scrappy," Jason sighed as he turned and headed for the limo.
Ok that is it for this install ment.
E-mail and let me know what you think frnceso@hotmail.com