Begin Anew
Copyright 2000 By Frnceso O'Rtg. All rights reserved. With the exceptions of short excerpts for critical reviews, no part of this work may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission in writing from the Author.
This story is complete fiction. This story in no way implies the ACTUAL sexual orientation or beliefs of Actual living people. In other words FICTION!!
Any comments are welcome. Good or bad. Feel free to e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com
Ok this is the one you have all been waiting for. The big make up scene. Actually there will two of them. Plus a sinister visitor from the past will come to haunt Jason and threaten to tear the Richardson family apart. Have fun!!!
(Last time on Begin Anew)
("Well we still have some things to work out but we are back together," Kevin said as he leaned forward and kissed Jason on the cheek. "So tell me about the Halloween decorations?" He was looking right at Johnny hoping beyond hope that Johnny would open up to him. Johnny just kept eating and refused to talk. Jason decided to step in.
"Johnny, your father is talking to you. You could at least be polite and --," Jason started.
"He's not my father!" Johnny yelled at Jason. "I don't want him here!"
"Jonathan!" Jason said loudly. "That is enough!"
"I hate him!" Johnny shouted again.
"All right!" Jason shouted back at Johnny. "You march yourself upstairs to your room and you think about what you said. And when you are ready you come down and apologies to him!" Johnny glared at his parents and stomped out of the room.
Jason looked over at Kevin and was shocked to see tears in his eyes. "He didn't mean it Kevin."
"Yea he did! And you know something? He is right? I'm not his father anymore. Excuse me," Kevin got up from the table and walked out of the dinning room. Jason sat there and listened to the front door close. He laid down his napkin and looked around.
"Justin?" he asked softly. "Can you go see Johnny? I need to talk to Kevin." He got up from the table and walked outside and followed Kevin to the one place that he knew he would be, the Gazebo. He walked down the worn path and found him sitting in the Swing. "Want some company?" Kevin moved over to make room for Jason. "He still loves you Kevin." Kevin laid his head on Jason's shoulder. "You are his father and we will get through this."
"I really made a mess of things, haven't I?" Kevin said as he reached out and took a hold of Jason's hand. "If I were him I wouldn't speak to me either."
"Give him time Babe," Jason consoled him.
Justin walked into Johnny's room in time to see Johnny throwing things into a bag. Justin raised his eyebrows and walked in and started to help Johnny pack. "What are you doing?" Johnny asked confused.
"What's it look like? I'm helping you pack." Justin picked up a picture of Kevin Jason and Johnny. It was on the day of the Bone Marrow Drive. (See Rude Awakening) "Do you want me to pack this?" Johnny turned and saw the picture he was holding. He shrugged his shoulders and sniffled. Justin sat the picture down and sat down on the bed. "Johnny, I think it is time you and I had a heart to heart.")
Chapter 7
"Maybe I don't wanna talk!" retorted Johnny as he glared at Justin. Justin's eyebrows shot up at Johnny's retort. Johnny kept packing his things shoving his belongings in the small backpack.
"Johnny," sighed Justin. "I know that you are very mad at Kevin. But at some point you have to forgive him and move on. He loves you very much!"
"He loves me, he loves me!" Johnny said mocking Justin's tone of voice. Justin had to cough back a laugh and clear his throat loudly. "That is all everyone keeps telling me that He loves me! Well why doesn't HE tell me that!" By this time Johnny had stopped packing. He walked over to the bed and plopped down beside Justin. Justin looked hard at Johnny and he could see the hurt and anger raging through the boy. He shook his head and wrapped his arm around Johnny's shoulders. Johnny laid his head On Justin's chest.
"Do you love him?" Justin asked. Johnny shrugged his shoulders and sniffled. "That is not an answer Johnny," Justin pressed on.
"Yea I think so," Johnny replied scrunching up his nose.
"Why don't you talk to him and tell him how you feel?" Justin asked.
"Cause I'm too angry right now. If I tell him how I feel I will only hurt him more," Johnny revealed.
"So you're angry at him. That shouldn't stop you from talking to him. Talk to him, yell at him, do what you need to do get through this. I can see that this is killing you both. Kevin wants to be a part of your life. You miss him something awful and I am getting real tired seeing you mad all the time. I miss the go lucky happy kid that is my Nephew," Justin said as he messed up Johnny's hair. Johnny of course did the most logical thing and swatted Justin's hands away. Soon the two were tangled up in a wrestling match. The rest of the house was treated to Justin and Johnny squealing with laughter. ****
Kevin laid his head on Jason's shoulder and played with Jason's ring finger admiring the wedding band he wore. Jason lightly stroked Kevin's back. "See something interesting?" asked an amused Jason.
"Only the man I fall in love with four years ago," Kevin replied as he took Jason's hand and kissed the back of it. Kevin looked up at Johnny's bedroom window in time to see Johnny pick a pillow and whack Justin up side the head with it. "He could always bring out the best in him."
"Yea Justin has always had a soft spot for Johnny," Jason said as he slipped his hand under Kevin's shirt and lightly stroked Kevin's chest. "What are you going to do about you two? At some point you are going to have to talk about this."
"But how Jas?" Kevin said in a frustrated tone of voice as he wiped a tear from his eye. "Every time I try to talk to him he either yells at me to go away or he walks away from me. Why wont he listen to me for just five minutes?"
"Give him the space he needs. Don't push him. He will come around Babe," Jason soothed him as he wiped a tear from Kevin's cheek. "Come on Kevin, let's go for a walk." Grinning he grabbed Kevin's hand and pulled him up and dragged him around the back of the gazebo and headed down the path. "I want to show you something."
"What?" asked Kevin grinning too at Jason's excitement.
"Just wait," giggled Jason. "You're going to love this!" They walked down the path and around the bend when Jason stopped and turned to Kevin. "Close your eyes!" He demanded. Kevin rolled his eyes and closed his eyes. Jason couldn't resist kissing him on the tip of his nose. Kevin let out a giggle and tried to kiss him back. But Jason's finger found Kevin's lips. "Not yet." Taking his hand he guided a curious Kevin around the bend and up to a fence. "Ok open your eyes." Kevin opened his eyes and smiled widely. "You like?" Jason asked smiling. Kevin took a couple of steps forward and leaned against the fence.
"My God Jason," he breathed. "It's beautiful!" He looked over the cliffs edge where you could see the mountain range of the Shenandoah Valley. The leaves were bright with their fall color. "How come I've never seen this part of South Fork?"
"This is my special place, I only show it to special people like you and Johnny," admitted Jason as he blushed. "Stupid isn't it?"
Kevin took Jason's face and brought it gently to his and pressed his lips against Jason's in a light kiss. "I don't think that is stupid Baby. I love the idea of you having a special place. Umm did you show it to umm --," pausing not sure if he should continue.
"Go ahead and ask Kevin, you just might be surprised by the answer," Jason encouraged him.
"Did you show it to Justin?" he asked wincing at the thought of the outburst.
"Yes Kevin, I showed it too him too," Jason looked at Kevin for signs of anger. "You're not angry at me?
"No Jas, I'm not angry at you. Justin was here for you at a time when I wasn't. I can't fault him for that. But I do have a question for you." Kevin stated as he rubbed Jason's shoulder as Jason leaned against him.
"Go ahead and ask," Jason prodded him looking up and smiling at Kevin's face.
"Why did you show it to him?" Jason looked up at him expecting to see anger or hurt and was relieved that he didn't see it. He took Kevin by the hand and led him to a tree and sat down and pulled Kevin down so that he was sitting in between his legs. "Is this going to be one of those stories again?"
"Yes Kevin it is," Jason said as he bent down and kissed Kevin on the top of the head.
Flash back two years ago in Orlando Florida
"Justin?" shouted Jason as he opened the door to Kevin's apartment. "I'm home!" He didn't hear anything and he wondered further into the apartment and looked around. Justin and Ben had moved in with Jason and Johnny. It was easier plus there was more room in the apartment than Justin's small house. Jason wondered further into the apartment and found a note taped to the TV.
Jason,
Ben has taken a turn for the worse. Johnny and I have taken him to the hospital. Please hurry. This could be it.
Justin
Jason grabbed the car keys and took off running out of the apartment. What seemed to be an eternity he finally pulled into the hospital parking garage.
Once inside he found where they had taken Ben. In no time at all he was outside the room. He paused to listen. He could hear Justin talking quietly to someone. He lightly pushed open the door and stepped inside. Johnny was standing next to the bed holding Justin's hand. Justin head was buried in Ben's chest. Jason looked at the heart monitor and saw the flat line. Jason quickly went to Justin's side and laid his hand on his shoulder. Justin looked up with tear stained eyes.
"He's gone Jas," sobbed Justin as he fell into Jason's arms. Jason eased Justin down on a couch. Jason motioned Johnny to the other side of Justin. "Why?" sobbed Justin as he balled up his fists. "Why did he leave me?"
"Justin?" Jason asked softly. Justin looked at him. "He is in a much better place."
"I don't want him to go Jason, I need him so bad," Justin said as fresh tears flowed down his face. Jason reached up and wiped the tears from his face. "I need him Jason!" Justin sobbed again.
"I know baby, I know you need him. But he is gone and we can't change that," Jason tried to talk to him. "I'm here and so is Johnny. We love you and we will be here for you for as long as you need us." Jason continued to hold Justin in his arms until the distraught singer fell asleep. Only then did Jason lay him down on the couch and leave to make the arrangements that was needed.
Two Weeks Later
Jason woke to the sound of glass breaking. Scrambling out of bed he raced out of the room. Looking around and not seeing anything he headed down stairs. He followed the sound of breaking glass. It was coming from the living room. He swung open the French doors in time to see a crystal vase go flying across the room and smash up against the fireplace. It "was" a wedding present from JC. "What the hell is going on?" he demanded as he looked at a very drunk Justin.
"I hate him!" Justin screamed as he picked up another matching vase. Jason quickly grabbed it from him and sat it back down.
"Ok so you hate him, but do you have to break everything in the living room?" Justin glared at him and sat down in the couch. "Now suppose you tell me who you hate?"
"Ben!" Justin slurred. "I hate him for making me fall in love with him and than leaving me!"
"Justin, you are drunk and you don't know what you are saying," Jason scolded Justin. "Why don't you go upstairs and get some rest and we will talk when you get up?" Justin glared at him for a few seconds and leaned forward and kissed Jason on the lips. Jason pushed him out of the way. "What the hell are you doing?" He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
"I kissed you because I wanted to," Justin slurred trying to kiss Jason again. Jason stood up and walked away from Justin.
"Justin stop it! You don't know what you are doing!" Justin stood and took a couple of steps toward Jason. "Please Justin, don't do this! Our friendship means too much to for you to mess it up by doing something stupid. Now you are drunk and you need to sleep it off so why don't you let me take you upstairs?" Justin nodded quietly and Jason took his arm and swung it over his shoulders and helped a very drunk Justin up stairs. Once he finally got Justin undressed and in bed he headed out side the room only to be stopped.
"Jas?" whimpered Justin. Jason turned around and saw Justin looking at Jason with a helpless look on his face. "Hold me please?" Jason frowned at him for a few seconds. "I promise that I won't do anything. I just need some one to hold me is all."
"Ok Justin, just let me get Johnny ready for school and I'll be right back," Jason said as he leaned down and kissed Justin on the forehead and left the room to get Johnny off to school. Once Jason got Johnny off to school he headed upstairs and into Justin's room and slid out of his clothes and slid under the blankets and pulled Justin close to him. Justin immediately wrapped his arms around Jason's neck.
"Why Jason?" he sobbed into Jason's shoulder. "Why did Ben leave me?" Jason held Justin and stroked the back of his head soothing Justin as best he could until Justin's sobs subsided and he fell asleep. Jason looked at Justin's face and tears came to Jason's eyes as he saw the pain on Justin's face.
"Ohh Justin if only I could make all this pain go away I would." Turning he saw Kevin's face staring down on him from at picture on the dresser. "What the hell are you looking at ass hole!" He hurled at the picture. "I don't see you here where you should be!" But the picture just continued to smile sweetly at Jason. Jason finally got mad and threw a shoe at it knocking it off the dresser. Justin moaned softly and snuggled deeper into Jason's chest. Jason rested his head on Justin's and closed his eyes.
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Three hours later,
Jason was dreaming that Kevin was back and he was giving him a blowjob. He opened his eyes and looked down only to get the shock of his life. Justin was bobbing up and down on his erect cock. He was seconds away from cumming and couldn't stop it. Tears came to his eyes as he shot his load down Justin's throat. Justin cleaned Jason's cock off and snuggled up to Jason's chest.
"Hi!" Justin said with a grin.
"What the hell were you thinking?" asked Jason harshly. "Do you know what you just did?" Justin looked up at Jason and Jason could see the hurt in his eyes.
"I'm sorry Jas, it is just that I thought I would give you pleasure is all," Justin sniffled.
"You thought that you would give me Pleasure!" Jason shouted. He shoved Justin off of him and climbed out of bed and pulled up his boxers. "I'm a married man!"
"Yes you are Jason!" Justin shouted back. "But where is he?"
"Don't do this Justin!" Jason warned him. "I still love him very much."
"God Jason how the hell can you do to this to yourself. Kevin doesn't give a rat's ass about you. He is probably screwing his brains out with some one else right now."
"Fuck you Justin!" Jason shouted at him as he stormed out of the room. He could hear Justin swearing at himself in the room. But Jason was so pissed that he didn't care. All he wanted to do is get as far away from him as possible. Once outside he went around to the back of the house to the gazebo. Plopping down in the porch swing he buried his head in his hands. All he could see was Kevin's smiling face. It was like he was teasing him. "I hate you!" he screamed up into the air. He spotted the ax in the woodpile so he ran to it and grabbed it and swung it at the gazebo shattering one of the supporting posts. The vibration of the ax slamming against the wood was satisfying to Jason so he swung again. A half an hour later the gazebo was in ruins and he was drenched in sweat. He had stopped crying long ago his emotions being replaced by rage. Dropping the ax to the ground he too sunk to the ground. He was breathing hard and ragged and didn't hear the crunch of leaves behind him.
"All done?" a voice said startling him. He jerked his head up in time to see Justin standing there looking at the wrecked Gazebo.
"Yea I guess I am," Jason muttered as he walked towards the house.
"Jas?" asked Justin.
"What?" Jason asked again.
"I'm sorry," Justin said looking down at his feet. "I shouldn't have done that."
"I still love him Justin, even though he left me I still love him. That will never change." Jason said as he rested his head against Justin's forehead.
"I know but I can't help the way I feel," he whimpered out.
"How do you feel?" Jason asked taking Justin's chin with his finger and lifted his head until he was looking into his eyes.
"I think I've fallen in love with you," Justin took a couple of steps back and turned around and headed down a path. "I mean I don't know when it happen it just did. Remember that fling that we had back when you were so sick?" Jason nodded silently. Those were some strange times. (Again see Rude Awakening) "Well I don't think I ever stopped loving you. And I guess when Ben died and Kevin didn't want anything to do with you I thought that maybe I stood chance with you. I guess I was wrong." Justin was headed down the path that only Jason took. Jason was tempted to follow him and stop him but decided that maybe this is what Justin needed. They continued on the path until it opened and Justin walked to the opening and looked over the view. Both men stood in silence as they gazed out over the valley. It was fall and the leaves were in full color. "How come you never showed this to anyone?"
"It is my special place. I always used to come here when I was down. I've coming here a lot lately. You should see it with the full moon out." Jason moved behind Justin and wrapped his arms around his waist and laid his head on his shoulder. "I think we need to set some boundaries for our relationship." Justin raised his eyebrows at him. "Nothing sexual can ever happen again. I still love Kevin very much. And until he tells me what he wants to do about us I can't be unfaithful to him."
"But I want to hold you at night and kiss you when you are sad or happy or just for the heck of it," Justin said with a pleading look on his face. Jason's heart went out to him and he found himself compromising.
"I can deal with holding and kissing. I need that too. Some times I get so mad at him. Why did he leave me? Doesn't he love me anymore?" It's been over a year and I haven't heard anything from him. I tried getting a hold of the other guys but there to busy to talk. Some times I get so frustrated I could scream!" Jason vented. Justin wrapped his arms around Jason's waist and pulled him close. "I miss him so much Justin!" Tears were flowing down his face again. Justin reached up and wiped them free.
"I hate him for what he did to you," Justin said softly to him as he leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the lips. Jason moved in with the kiss and opened his mouth to allow Justin in. Jason had to admit it Justin was a good kisser. But he still missed Kevin's kisses. Justin had moved to Jason's chin and was working towards his neck. If Jason didn't stop him now they would be in trouble. He gently pushed Justin away. Justin stuck out his bottom lip in a pout.
"You look so cute when you pout like that," giggled Jason. Justin blushed and looked down. "Come on let's get up to the house. Johnny is due off the bus any time." Holding out his hand he took Justin's hand in his and led him back up to the house. As they passed the wrecked Gazebo Justin let out a small laugh. "What was that for?"
"I don't ever think I have ever seen you go off like that," Justin laughed. He walked over to inspect the damage. "I think we are going to have to rebuild it from the ground up."
"You volunteering your services?" Jason asked with a grin. Justin shrugged his shoulders and wrapped his arm around Jason's shoulder and continued their trek towards the gates. Johnny would be coming home in a bit. They would have to discuss this new arrangement with him. Jason saw in his mind Kevin's disapproving eyes glaring down at him. "Fuck you Kevin! If you were here with me I wouldn't going through this right now!" He swore to himself. Kevin's face disappeared.
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Back to the present.
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Kevin looked at Jason with tears in his eyes. "I had no idea of the pain you went through. I am thankful that you had someone with you to help you."
He looked down at his feet and than again at Jason. Jason knew that Kevin wanted to ask him something.
"Go ahead and ask Kevin," he gently prodded him.
"You lied to me," Kevin said looking down again. "You said you never had sex with him."
"You said it yourself Kevin," Jason said. "I didn't have sex with him. I didn't ask for that blowjob and he didn't ask if he could give it to me. He took it. I hated the fact that I did that. But I didn't ask for it and I didn't want it. I love you! Why can't you see that?"
"I'm sorry baby, it's just that I can't stand the thought of someone touching you like that," admitted Kevin. Jason leaned down and kissed Kevin on the cheek. Kevin turned around so that he was facing Jason. "Can I kiss you?"
"You don't need to ask me that Kevin," Jason said with confusion in his eyes.
"No I mean can I kiss you kiss you?" Kevin asked with his eyes aflame with love. Jason let out a grin and pushed Kevin down on the ground and straddled him. "Hmmm I could get used to this," Kevin giggled.
"No time to talk!" Jason ordered as he lay down on top Kevin and pressed his lips against Kevin's. Kevin let out a groan and wrapped his arms around Jason's neck. Jason's tongue probed until Kevin parted his lips and allowed Jason in. Once inside Jason's tongue danced around Kevin's mouth. It had seemed like an eternity for Jason. But when he was inside Kevin's mouth it all came back. The breathing and soft moans that Kevin would let out. Kevin slowly started grinding his hips against Jason's. Jason could tell that Kevin was getting aroused. He stopped kissing Kevin for a few seconds so he could remove his shirt. Kevin's shirt followed too. Jason lay down on top of Kevin again pressing his naked chest against Kevin. Jason let out a small sob as Kevin's and his flesh touched once again. He was home where he belonged. In the arms of Kevin, his husband. He felt Kevin urgent hands as they pulled on his sweat pants. Jason helped Kevin slide off his sweat pants. Kevin picked up Jason and layed him down on the bed of fall leaves. Kevin knelt over him as he gazed down at his lover. Jason shivered under the intense lustful gaze of his lover. Kevin smiled a wicked smile as he reached down and pulled Jason's boxers down freeing Jason aching cock. Kevin's smile disappeared as he caught sight of Jason's erection. "Pleas Kevin," whimpered Jason.
"Please what?" asked Kevin as he continued to drink in Jason's beauty with his eyes.
"Take off the rest of your clothes!" demanded Jason in a raspy voice. Kevin eyebrows shot up when he heard the desire in Jason's voice. Kevin stood up and slowly seductively stripped off his sweat pants. He than leaned casually against the tree smiling down on Jason. Jason let out a frustrated groan and Kevin busted up laughing and quickly stripped off his boxers. He than walked over to Jason and lay on top of him. The shock of Kevin's naked flesh against his was too much for Jason. He buried his head into Kevin's shoulder sobbing. Kevin looked worried down at his lover.
"Jas?" he asked choking up himself. Jason looked up at Kevin with tears flowing down his cheeks. "What's wrong babe?"
"It's been so long since I've seen you like this. I want this moment to last forever," Jason whispered as he reached out and took hold of Kevin's cock. He felt the organ twitch in excitement at his touch. Kevin smiled at Jason's enthusiasm. Jason liked his lips in anticipation.
"You want something Jas?" giggled Kevin as he inched forward to allow Jason access to his cock. Jason simply nodded at his opened his mouth and engulfed Kevin's cock. "Ooooh God Jas!" he moaned out as he gently pushed his Cock deeper into Jason's mouth. Jason moaned softly as Kevin's cock slid deeper into this mouth filling it completely until the tip of it tickled the back of his throat. He inhaled deeply relishing the musky scent that came from Kevin's body. He had missed that smell so much. He started to bob slowly up and down on Kevin's shaft. Kevin kept moaning and groaning softly as his lover gave him pleasure. He didn't want to rush Jason. This was Jason's time. And he would give him all the time he wanted. Jason looked up at Kevin and smiled as he pulled off of Kevin's cock. Kevin looked down with confusion.
"Make love to me please?" Jason pleaded.
"Jas, it's been so long, I don't want to hurt you," Kevin said softly.
"Please Kevin, I need to feel you inside me now!" Jason urged.
"OK Jas, but you have to promise me if it hurts you will ask me to stop?" Kevin asked with his brow wrinkled with concern.
"I promise Kevin. Now please," Jason pleaded again. Kevin picked up Jason's ankles and placed them on his shoulder and positioned the head of his cock at Jason's entrance. "Are you sure about this?"
Letting out a growl and glare. "Yes I am sure!" Kevin let out a soft laugh as he looked down at the frustration in Jason's eyes. Kevin gently pushed the head of his cock past the ring and as it popped in Jason let out a gasp of pain. Kevin stopped and leaned down and kissed the tears from Jason's face.
"I'm so sorry baby," he sobbed out. Jason put his hands on either side of Kevin's face and looked into his eyes.
"It's ok Kevin," he breathed out. "I'm fine, please continue." Kevin nodded as he pushed in further. Jason let out another groan. This time it was out of pleasure. "OOOOH God Kevin!" he breathed out. Kevin smiled at his lover's reaction to his lovemaking. "Now!" Jason urged. Kevin knew what he wanted so he started thrusting in and out slowly building up speed. Jason watched with lust-glazed eyes as Kevin continued to make love to him. "Come on Kev, harder." Jason prodded. Kevin threw back his head and put his weight into it. Jason wrapped his ankles around Kevin's buttocks sealing him in. Kevin continued to ride Jason to ecstasy. Jason relished the feel of Kevin inside of him. Each time Kevin's cock slammed into him it sent waves of pleasure raging through Jason.
"Ohhh God Jas, I'm close!" he rasped out. Jason held Kevin still for a few moments to ease Kevin off of his orgasmic high. Kevin looked disappointed.
"I want this to last lover boy," whispered Jason as he let Kevin continue. He did this three more times to poor Kevin. Kevin was drenched in sweat and every muscle in his gorgeous body stood out as he strained to hold back as long as he could. Jason just kept urging him on by thrusting his hips up to meet Kevin's onslaught.
"AUUUUUGGHH!!" screamed Kevin as he slammed in one last time unleashing the flood of juices he had been building for his love. Jason felt Kevin's cock explode inside flooding his bowels. The sudden searing sensation pushed him over the edge as well and he too shot his load. Some of it landed on Kevin's rugged features and the rest landed on Jason's chest and abs. Kevin lowered himself onto Jason's chest breathing heavily. "Ohhh God Jas, that was so incredible!" Jason answered by licking off his cum from Kevin's face. The two lovers lay in each other arms for a few minutes basking in the after glow of their lovemaking.
After about five minutes of resting Kevin felt a pair of lips grace his chest. He looked down and smiled as Jason began to cover his chest with soft kisses. "What are you doing?" he giggled out. Jason looked up at him and grinned. It took Kevin's breath away. Jason's hair was all messed up from their lovemaking. His eyes were wild and full of love. "God you are so beautiful!" he breathed out. Jason blushed and laid his head on Kevin's chest. "Uh uh lover boy. As much as I hate to leave this moment we have to go back up to the house and deal with our son."
"He loves you know?" Jason asked as he got up and gathered up his clothes and started getting dressed.
"I don't know Jas, he is so angry with me right now," Kevin said as he slipped on his sweat pants. "Sometimes I wonder if we will ever get over this."
"The fact that he is so angry at you proves that he loves you Baby," Jason said as he wrapped his arm around Kevin's waist and headed back up to the house.
"Maybe you are right Jas," Kevin sighed. As they reached the back yard they paused at the gazebo and Kevin took an extra hard look at it. Sure enough it was a new one. Basically it was the same except for subtle differences. Jason had installed lights in it and ceiling fan too. There was a speaker system installed too to pipe in music. "I like the changes Jas," he commented as he ran his hand over smoothly varnished wood.
"It was Justin's idea for the speakers," Jason commented as he laid his head on Kevin's shoulder. They heard the back door slide shut and looked up to see JC walk out onto the patio. The butler had laid out lunch for them. It was cool out but not cold enough not enjoy lunch outside. "We were gone for that long?" asked Jason as he pulled Kevin towards the tables of food. "Come on Kevin! I'm starving!" Kevin busted up laughing as he took Jason's hand and followed him up to the patio. The door flew open and Justin and Johnny came strolling out. To Kevin's pleased surprised Johnny waved and smiled at him. Jason gave him a squeeze with the hand. Jason let go of Kevin's hand and grabbed a plate and started piling on the food. Justin looked at the plate than at Jason and grinned. "What?" Jason asked innocently.
"You got laid!" Justin said grinning. Jason immediately turned several shades red. "Hah hah! I was right!" Justin giggled as he grabbed an apple and plopped in on Jason's plate. He than kissed Jason on the cheek. "I'm happy for you sweetie!"
"Thanks Justin, did you and Johnny have a good talk?" Jason asked as he grabbed a bottle of water and a glass of ice and sat down next to Kevin.
"Yea I did. I think he is ready to have that talk with Kevin now," Justin said as he bit into his sandwich. JC sat next to Justin and smiled at him. Justin smiled back and placed his hand on his thigh. Jason's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Later Jas," Justin promised.
"Umm Dad?" Johnny asked as he sat next to Kevin. Kevin looked down at him and waited patiently for him to continue. "Umm can we talk after lunch?"
"Yea sure Johnny, I'll be happy to talk to you," Kevin said grinning at Jason.
"Umm actually I just want to talk and I was kinda hoping you would listen for a while," Johnny said in a small voice.
"Of course Johnny, I will be more than happy to listen to anything you have to say to me," Kevin said in a relieved tone of voice. Finally Johnny was going to talk to him. If he was lucky maybe they could start rebuilding their friendship. Kevin turned and looked over at JC and Justin. He too noticed that JC's hand was on Justin thigh. "Something you two want to tell us?" Justin looked up in surprise. Kevin pointed at JC's hand that was still resting on Justin's thigh.
"Oh that," giggled Justin blushing even deeper.
"Yea Justin, that," laughed Jason, obviously enjoying Justin's discomfort. "So you two want to let us in on the secret?
"Well I guess we should tell them," JC said grinning. He took Justin's hand and brought it to his lips and kissed the back of it. "Umm I asked Justin to go with me."
"And?" asked Jason obviously impatient for the answer. Kevin laughed softly at his lover's impatience. "Well come on spill it. We want all the details!"
"Yea guys you better tell him or he is going to pop with excitement," giggled Kevin as he leaned over and kissed Jason on the lips.
"He said yes!" JC exclaimed. Justin grinned as he laid his head on JC's shoulder and JC turned and kissed the top of Justin's curly head.
"Awwww aint they cute?" cooed Jason.
"EWWWW yucky! That is mushy stuff!" laughed Johnny. Leave it too Johnny to bring the house down with laughter. They finished their lunch under the fall sky with the mountains in the background all decked out in their fall colors.
Chapter 8
Jason was sitting in his study going over his latest screenplay when a shadow crossed over his desk. He looked up and smiled. "Hey sweetie!" Kevin smiled as he came around the desk and leaned down and kissed him on the lips.
"I'm going with Johnny and have that talk," he said as he looked down at his feet.
"Nervous?" asked Jason as he placed his hand on the side of Kevin's face.
"Yea, kinda. I mean this is my chance to start rebuilding our relationship.
I don't want to blow this," Kevin admitted. They were interrupted by a knock at the door. Kevin turned around and swallowed hard and reached up and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
"You ready Dad?" Johnny asked with his hand on Scrappy's back. Turns out that Johnny was just a nervous as Kevin was. Jason's heart went out to both of them.
"Come in Johnny," he said as he took Kevin's hand and led him to the couch. Johnny came around with Scrappy following close behind. "Sit down beside your Dad," Jason said pointing to the couch. Johnny sat down beside Kevin looking down at his feet. "I'll only take a few minutes of your time than I will leave you two alone."
Kevin and Jason looked up and nodded at Jason. Jason knelt between the two of them and took their hands and placed in each other's hand and laid his hand on top of theirs. "I am so lucky. My heart is so full right now. I have you two thank for that. Kevin, Johnny loves you so very much. He is angry with you right now. And it has taken a long time to get to this point. Please listen to him and hear him out. He has a lot to say and he loves you very much. Many a night I would hear him crying late at night for you. It broke my heart to see him in such pain. But you are here now so please listen to what he has to say." Turning to Kevin he leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. He than rested his head on Kevin's forehead. "That little boy loves you mister. Don't mess this up." With that said he got up and tugged at the reluctant Scrappy's leash. "Come on Scrappy let's leave these two men alone so they can talk." He walked out of the study and quietly closed the door behind them and closed his eyes in a silent prayer.
"So they are in there talking" a voice said startling Jason out of his thoughts.
"Yea Justin, they are in there. Hopefully all is going well," Jason whispered out. Justin put his hand on Jason's shoulder.
"I am sure that they will be fine. You look tired Jas, you should take a nap," Justin said.
"Yea maybe I will for a little while," Jason said as he headed into his bedroom. As he walked to the bathroom a huge wave of weakness washed over him and a cold sweat broke over him. He grabbed the sink for support. "No!" he shouted to himself. "Not now! Not again!" He stood there waiting for the weakness to pass. He took out the thermometer and placed it under his tongue. When it beeped he pulled it out and looked at it. "No!!" he sobbed out. "This can't happen again!" He looked into the mirror and looked hard at himself. "Maybe I am just tired is all. I'll get some rest and it will pass." As he left the bathroom he heard internal voice scolding him. "No Jason this will not pass!" Tears flowed down his face as he lay on the bed and pulled the covers over his feverish body. "Why?" he sobbed out as drifted off into fever induced sleep.
In the study
"So you have something to say to me?" Kevin asked softly. Johnny looked up at him and took a deep breath before talking.
"Have you ever been mad at your dad before?" he asked.
"Yes Johnny, for a very long time I was angry at your grandpa," Kevin admitted.
"Why?" asked Johnny.
"He left me Johnny. And all though I understood why he had to leave it still made me angry," Kevin said as he forced his mind to travel back those many years ago.
"Did he come back?" Johnny asked. Kevin shut his eyes and willed the tears not to come.
"No Johnny, he never came back," Kevin whispered quietly. "You see grandpa had cancer and died when I was just a teenager." He reached up and wiped a tear from his eye.
"Are you still angry at him?" asked Johnny. Kevin looked down at his son and smiled.
"No son, I'm not angry at him any more," Kevin said. Johnny looked away and started to play with his fingers. "You have something to say to me?"
"I'm still mad at you," Johnny whispered. Kevin nodded silently and laid his hand on the boy's shoulder. He was pleased when Johnny didn't pull away.
"It's all right for you to be angry son. I can't fault you for that. I made a huge mistake by leaving Jason and you. For that I am so sorry and will spend the rest of my life making that up to you."
"Why did you do it Dad?" Johnny asked him. Kevin shook his head from side to side. "That is not an answer Dad!"
"I know it is not son. When the judge took you away from Jas and me my heart broke into a million pieces. I had to leave for a while. To work things out for myself before I could come back home," Kevin tried to explain.
"Did you stop loving us?" he asked Kevin.
"Ohhh Johnny," Kevin sobbed out not even bothering to wipe them free. "I have never stopped loving you. I could never stop loving Jason or you."
"Than why did you leave!" Johnny sobbed out too. "I hated you when you did that. When my mother told me I could go back home with you and Jason I was so happy. But than I got here and you weren't here. Why?" Johnny stood up and walked to the window and looked out onto the lawn. "I used to pray that you would come home to take care of Dad. Did you know that he used to cry all the time with out you here. He was never happy. Especially around the holidays." Johnny said. He had stopped crying and turned back to look at Kevin.
"I can't make up for the time I was gone. I can't make go back in time to fix it. If I could Johnny I would. But understand this. I am here now and I am not going anywhere. I love you son! Please can give us the chance we need?" Kevin was holding out his hands for his son and Johnny ran to him and threw his arms around his neck crying into his shoulder.
"I love you too Daddy!" he sobbed out. Kevin and Johnny held each other for the longest time. They heard a knocking at the door and looked up to see Justin standing at the door.
"Kevin, I need to talk to you for a minute," he said with a worried tone in his voice.
"It's cool Dad. I have to put JC back to work on the Halloween decorations anyway," Johnny said with a grin as he headed out of the room. Kevin walked out with Justin. Justin led him to the bedroom and followed him in.
"What is it Justin?" he asked in confusion.
"Something is wrong with Jason," Justin said softly as he pointed to the bed. Kevin face paled when he saw his lover drenched in sweat.
"Get the thermometer from the bathroom," he said as he sat down on the bed beside Jason. "Jas?" he asked softly. Jason let out a moan and turned over. "Jason, please wake up," Kevin urged as he shook his shoulder. Jason opened his eyes and smiled up at Kevin. "You're burning up babe!" Kevin said as he held the back of his hand to Jason's forehead. Justin came out of the bathroom with the thermometer and handed it to Kevin. Kevin placed it under Jason's tongue and waited until it beeped. Kevin took it out and looked at it.
"Oh God no!" he sobbed out. "This isn't happening again!" He dropped the thermometer on the floor and pulled Jason into a hug. "God Dammit! Why can't we get a fucking break?" He shouted up at the ceiling.
"Now guys let's calm down. He may just have the flu. After all it is right around the corner," Justin said trying to calm them down.
"Justin, you know from experience what this means," Kevin said looking at Jason. "The cancer is back."
"No!" shouted Justin. "We don't know for sure! It could be anything! It could be the flu or something else. But not that fucking cancer!" Jason looked up at Justin and saw that Justin was angry.
"Justin is right Kevin," Jason said in a soft tone. "We don't know for sure. It could be the cancer but than again it could be a number of other things. I'm making an appointment first thing in the morning and we will find out for sure."
"No!" shouted Kevin startling everyone in the room. "We find out now!" He picked up Jason and carried him down the stairs and outside. On the way to the garage he ran into JC. "JC can you stay and watch Johnny for me? I have to take Jason in to the emergency room." Johnny's eyes got big as saucers as he saw Kevin carrying his Dad. He saw the damp hair on Jason's head and that he was shaking from the cool fall air.
"What's wrong with Dad?" he asked his voice cracking. JC leaned down and looked into the young boy's eyes.
"He isn't feeling well so Kevin and Justin are going to take him in to let the Doctor see him," JC answered in a soothing voice.
"It's the cancer isn't it?" asked Johnny as tears filled his eyes. JC's face paled as he heard the Cancer word. He quickly pulled Johnny into a hug.
"I don't know Johnny, we're just going to have to let the Doctors see what they can find. He watched in fear as Justin got behind the wheel of the car and put it in reverse and peeled wheels out of the garage and sped down the drive. "God please don't do this again to him," JC said through his tears.
In the car
Kevin held Jason close to him as the car raced out of the gates of South Fork. "It's going to be ok Jas," he whispered into Jason's ear. Jason nodded silently not trusting himself to talk. Kevin continued to hold Jason as Justin sped towards the hospital. Kevin pulled out his cell and called ahead to let them know that they were on their way. That way the Doctors could be standing by. As the car sped towards town Kevin couldn't help but look outside at the scenery speeding by. He was reminded of the last time Jason was sick. Those were dark and trying times for his family. Than came Johnny and he too was sick and they almost lost him. Kevin closed his eyes in a silent prayer that the Lord would watch over him and his family. "God I've come to far to loose them now. Please don't take him away from me. I love him," he sobbed aloud. Jason reached out and touched Kevin's face. Kevin looked down at him and saw him smiling at him.
"I love you Kevin," Jason breathed out.
"Don't try to talk Baby, save your strength," Kevin soothed him.
"But I love you Kevin," Jason said again with more force. "Never forget that!" Kevin nodded as he kissed the top of his head.
Justin looked in the rear view mirror at the two lovers. "Man I can't believe that I tried to take Jason away from Kevin." He was filled with guilt as he thought of the things that he did to try and win Jason's love. He made a vow right than and there that he would never again try to steal Jason away from Kevin. Clearly Jason loved Kevin and Kevin loved Jason. Nothing would be able to tear those to apart.
Two Hours later
Jason was laying in a bed with an IV in his arm sleeping quietly. The tests were done and at the lab. Kevin had insisted on staying to make sure that he was with Jason when they got the news. Good or bad he wanted to be there for him. Justin being his typical stubborn self had chosen to stay as well.
It was growing dark out and it was growing cold too.
Jason moaned out Kevin's name jerking Kevin out of his deep thoughts. He rushed to Jason's side only to find that he was still asleep. He smiled as he brushed a hair out of Jason's face. He always love it when Jason moaned out his name. That was when Kevin knew that Jason loved him. Justin heard it too and looked over to make sure that all was well.
He saw Kevin kneeling at Jason's bedside holding his hand and looking into Jason's face. Justin was hit again with a sense of guilt as he witnessed the love that Kevin was portraying for Jason. The door opened and the Doctor walked in. Justin watched his face closely for signs of anything. The Doctor lips were pressed closely together. Justin took it as a bad sign and sat up straight preparing himself for the worse.
"How is the patient?" asked the Doctor as he picked up the chart looking it over.
"He is asleep, do you have any news?" asked Kevin as he stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. Jason moaned again as he opened his eyes and looked around. "Hi baby, how are you feeling?" asked Kevin as he knelt beside him again.
"I feel some what better," rasped out Jason. He cleared his throat as he looked at the Doctor. "Well Doc, let's have it. It's back isn't it?"
The Doctor cleared his throat again and sat down on the bed. He looked down at the chart for a few moments. "Lymphoma is a very stubborn type of cancer. It was in remission for just over three years. I'm afraid it has come back Jason." Kevin let out a strangled sob and buried his head in Jason's shoulder. Jason just stared at the wall not saying anything for a few moments. When he finally did talk he was harsh and angry. "So it is back to square one again. More fucking chemo and more fucking radiation. So tell me Doc, how fucking bad is it this time?" He grabbed the pitcher of water on the bedside and threw it across the room. "Fuck you!" he screamed at the ceiling. "Why? Will you tell me why? What the fuck did I ever do to you?" He looked down at his hands and balled them into fists.
"We should start chemo as soon as possible Jason," the Doctor said softly. "We need to discuss your treatment too.
"Not tonight all right Doc?" he pleaded as he swung out of bed and started getting dressed.
"Where do you think you are going?" asked Kevin reaching out and taking Jason by the arm.
"I'm going for a walk!" he hurled at Kevin.
"You are sick and belong here," pleaded Kevin.
"I am going for a fucking walk! Don't dare try to stop me!" Jason shouted at him. He stormed out of the room. Kevin swore silently and took off after Him. Once outside he followed Jason at a distance. They walked for over an hour before Jason stopped and turned around and waited for Kevin to catch up. Kevin stopped just inches from him. "Hold me please?" he sobbed out. Kevin wrapped his arms around Jason. "You mad at me?" he whimpered out.
"No Jas," answered Kevin. "I could never be angry at you. I love you and I will stand by you for this for as long as it takes."
"I don't think I can survive this again Kevin," Jason said as fresh tears flowed down his face. "I don't want to go through that hell again. Please don't make me." Kevin looked up at him in fear. "I don't want to go through it again!" he shouted at Kevin.
"No!" Kevin sobbed out. "I won't let you go!" Jason tried to break Kevin's hold on him. "No!" Kevin shouted at him. "You are not going to give up on me!"
"Let me go!" Jason shouted as he tried to get loose. Kevin strengthen his hold on Jason. Soon they were on the ground with Kevin holding him close. "Let me die!" Jason wailed out.
"No!" Kevin sobbed out. "If you die than I will too." Jason stopped struggling and he looked at Kevin. "If you die than I might as well die too. You are the only reason I live now. So you listen to me you stubborn jackass. You are going to fight this fucking demon and you beat this fucking demon and you win. Because you will not leave me or Johnny to go through this fucked up world alone!" Jason nodded silently and Kevin stood up and held out his hand and helped Jason up on his feet. Jason looked into Kevin's eyes and shuddered with emotion at the sight of the love searing into him from those eyes. "We do this together as a family!" Kevin rasped out as tears flowed down his cheeks. "Together!" Jason nodded again and took Kevin's hand and headed back to the hospital.
Back at the hospital room.
"I want my treatment to be done at South Fork," Jason announced to the Doctor. "No more hospitals!"
"It would be so much easier if we could monitor you here," the Doctor argued.
"No!" shouted Kevin. "If my husband wants to be treated at home that you will accommodate him!" The Doctor nodded silently.
"I'll be by your house to discuss it in the morning," the Doctor said shortly as he walked out of the room.
"Let's go home Jas," said Kevin as he took Jason by the arm and walked out of the room.
Later at South Fork
Jason was in his study working on his screen play. Kevin was sitting on the couch watching Jason work. He smiled as he watched his lover at work. Jason had been writing eversince he got back home. Kevin was content to sit and watch him. He was still captivated by his good looks. He loved the way his hair was always messed up in the front. It gave Jason a wild and youthful look. Kevin caught himself licking his lips. He had to take care of something quick.
Jason felt a hand on his lap and he looked down to see the smiling face of Kevin. Kevin eased his hand to Jason's crotch. "Behave Kevin!" instructed Jason as he swatted his hand away.
"But Jas, I was wondering if Jr. could come out and play?" he asked as he gently stroked Jason's cock through his sweats. Jason bit his bottom lip as he tried not to moan. "Besides he is all excited now!" Kevin giggled as he eased Jason's sweats down to reveal Jason's silk boxers.
"You are just plain bad Kevin!" laughed Jason as he pushed the keyboard away and looked down at Kevin. Kevin reached into the boxers and pulled Jason's cock out and kissed the head making Jason moan out loud.
"See?" giggled Kevin. "I told you he wanted to play." He than wrapped his lips around the head and slowly engulfed the entire cock. Jason threw back his head and groaned aloud.
"Ohhh God Kevin," Jason moaned as he slowly started to pump in and out of Kevin's mouth. Kevin enjoyed the feel of Jason's cock in his mouth. He loved the silky smooth texture of it. He ran his tongue over the head paying particular attention to the slit hole. Making sure he gathered up all the precome swallowing the gift that Jason offered. His senses alive and on fire to every thing that was going on around him. He relished the moans and heavy breathing of Jason. He loved the feeling of Jason's rock hard abs and chest muscles as he approached the point of no return. He felt Jason's cock swell inside just before he came. "OOOOOh fuck Kevin! I'm cumming!" Jason screamed as he shot his load down Kevin's waiting throat. Kevin swallowed as quickly as he could. Jason let loose about seven good shots until his orgasm subsided. Finally his cock soften and slid out of his mouth. Kevin licked Jason clean and sat in Jason's lab and wrapped his arm around Jason's neck and kissed him on the lips. "Thank you baby," Jason whispered as he put his head on Kevin's forehead.
"I love you Jas," Kevin said as he looked into Jason's eyes.
"I love you too Kevin," Jason said just before a huge yawn overcame him.
"You need to go to bed baby," laughed Kevin as he slid his arms under Jason and picked him up. "Let me take care of you tonight Jas." Jason laid his head against Kevin shoulder and closed his eyes as Kevin carried him into the bedroom. Once inside he placed Jason on the bed and opened the curtains so Jason could see the full moon. He than stripped to the nude and stripped Jason too and crawled under the silk sheets and pressed his body against Jason's. Jason groaned softly and snuggled up against Kevin's body
"I love you Kevin," Jason said sleepily.
"I love you too Jas," Kevin whispered back.
Three hours later Kevin was still awake watching Jason sleep. Jason looked just like an angle asleep. But Kevin realized about two hours ago that sleep was going to evade him. He sighed heavily and untangled himself from Jason and slipped on a robe and padded out of the room. He looked into Johnny's room and saw that Johnny had left the light on and had fallen asleep at his computer desk. Scrappy was stretched out on the bed. Kevin sighed as he woke Scrappy up and got him off the bed. He than gently picked up his son and placed him in bed. After covering him up he left the room. Walking down stairs he made his way to the living room where he found Justin asleep in JC's arms. JC was watching the late show. "Go to bed JC and take your lover with you," Kevin said as he messed up JC's hair. JC turned the TV off and laid the remote on the table and woke Justin up and they headed upstairs. Kevin picked up the phone an dialed a number.
In Orlando
The shrill ringing of a telephone woke him up and he grabbed it and held it to his ear. "Hello?" he groaned into the phone.
"Brian?" asked Kevin on the other end.
"Kevin?" asked Brian as he looked at the clock. "God Kevin! It's three in the morning. What do you need?"
"It's Jas," Kevin said as he choked back tears. "It's come back." There was silence on the other end. "Brian?"
"Yea Kevin, I'm here," Brian said as he wiped some tears away. "When did you find out?"
"We found out early this evening," Kevin said.
"Do you need me there. Because if you do you know I am there for you and Jas," Brian asked as he got out of bed and walked over to the chair and sat down.
"Can you come? I mean if it is a good time and you're not too busy," stammered Kevin.
"God Kevin!" yelled Brian. "Of course I can come. You and Jason are family. I'm on the next plane out. Do you mind if I bring Trevor?"
"Trevor?" asked Kevin confused. "Oh my replacement. Sure you can bring him. Jason would love to meet him." After making a few arrangements they hung up and Brian got up and headed out of the room.
"Baby?" asked a voice. Brian turned around and looked at the younger man.
"Yea Trev?" asked Brian smiling.
"What is wrong?" asked Trevor.
"You remember me talking about Jason?" Brian asked as he walked back to the bed and sat down.
"Yea isn't he Kevin's husband?" Trevor asked as he scrunched up his nose.
"Yes he is, and his cancer is back. We are flying out to see them tomorrow." Brian said as he leaned down and kissed his lover Trevor.
OK everyone that is it for this one. We finally get to hear from Kevin's replacement. Wonder what he is doing with Brian. Jason's cancer is back! Wow don't those guys ever get a break? I guess you will have to tone in to find out.
Any comments please e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com
Pease and love everyone.