Bernie and the Bear Chapter 6
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Chapter Six
Reset
The weather was finally turning cooler. I started out and went back in to put on some jeans. When I got to Terry's place, he answered the door in an oversized tee-shirt and a pair of flannel pajama pants that looked very old and worn out. There was a clear impression of his penis showing on the front of them. Even in my current state of mind, I couldn't help but notice such things. He saw me looking and a tiny smile crossed his face before he ushered me in. With his hair not combed, three-day beard growth and his dad outfit, it was clear he wasn't trying to impress me.
"Wow, what happened to you in the last week, Terry?" I said chuckling.
"Terry wasn't working out, so a friend sent him away. I'm...uh...I think I'm going back to James now" he said, "its what I went by all through high school. T. James Ballard. I always hated the name Terrence."
"James, huh? That'll be kind of weird. My little brother's called JJ, short for James Jr." I said.
He locked the door and sat down beside me. I leaned over and gave him a quick kiss.
"I thought this wasn't a booty call?" he asked, "Not that I'd complain..."
"Just a hello kiss, don't get hot and bothered" I said.
We sat in silence for a while watching reruns of reruns of the original Star Trek on some channel. Between episodes we'd talk.
"I'd like to get in better shape, like you. Can I join you when you do your workout?" he asked.
"The first week or so will be hard. You'll want to either quit or die" I half-jokingly said.
"Looks like the results are worth it" he said, looking me over.
"I don't know. I'm not some Greek god or anything" I told him, thinking all the flaws I saw in the mirror every morning.
"You just don't appreciate it because you're seeing it from the cockpit" he said. "Think about it like a porn video. When the camera angle is from above, like the guy is looking down on himself, the cock never looks as big as when they move the camera below it looking up toward the guy's face."
"Wow, what an analogy" I said laughing.
"Maybe. But you know exactly what I mean, don't you?" he said.
"I guess. I'm more critical of myself, to an extent. You don't have to change for me, though. Don't think that. I like you either way" I said.
He scooted a couple of inches closer to me, and we shut up because the next episode was `The Trouble with Tribbles' and we had to watch that one. During the show I caught myself edging closer to him and about halfway through he had his arm around me and my head was laying on his shoulder. When `Tribbles' went off he turned off the television. We sat there quietly enjoying the closeness.
"My brother says, from what I told him...he said you may be my `soul mate' or something" I whispered.
"You talked to your brother...about...US?...As in...like a relationship?" he said as if in disbelief.
"We talked about a lot of things. He's the only one in my family who knows me really" I said, "anyway, he's got a way of figuring things out when I can't, and that's what he thinks."
"Well, I don't know but...it's like...I..." he hesitated, "like...Shit! I can't explain it. You just make me feel...I don't know...happy?...when you're here. No. That's lame. I can't really put it in words..."
I just nodded. That was kind of how I was feeling too.
"Look, I know you said you weren't here on a booty call..." he started.
"I never actually said that. I said wasn't feeling exactly sexy" I said, "but that was a couple of hours ago."
"Oh...so?..." he began and kind of trailed off.
"So...did you have something on your mind?" I asked.
"Well...I think I'd like to try...you know" he said.
"Are you sure?" I asked.
"If you'll go slow and make sure I'm ready before you do anything" he said. It was kind of funny how he was dancing around saying the words, after the way he used to be so blunt about everything. So, this was the real him?"
"I promise I won't do anything to you until you're begging me to" I said, "Deal?"
"Deal" he said, practically dragging me by the hand into his bedroom. I sat on the bed and he ran to the other room to find another condom.
"Damn! Last one" he said.
"We'll have to make sure it works the first time, then" I said, smiling.
I pulled at the drawstring on his flannel PJs and loosened them until they dropped to the floor; just as I'd suspected he was commando underneath. Once he kicked them off his feet, I told him to get on the bed on his knees and spread his legs wide. Once that order had been followed, I stood up and undressed then crawled up and pulled his beefy, hairy cheeks apart to look at the tiny untouched hole in the middle. I leaned in and took a sniff; nothing but a musk and a little soapy odor. When my tongue slithered across the opening I watched as the gooseflesh spread across him. I circled his hole for a few minutes before applying pressure to push the tip of my tongue into the tightly sealed crevice.
"You're going to have to cooperate Terry James" I said, "push out."
I kept up my pressure and when he flexed my tongue slid in a little. I worked it around until the portal started to open a tiny increment. I slipped a finger into my mouth and got it wet and carefully, slowly pushed it into him until it was all the way in. I pulled the index out and replaced it with my middle finger, then slowly began feeling for that small firm spot in the wall behind his dick. When I felt it, I started pressing on it and making circles. That's when I heard him make kind of a groany/whiney sound and when I felt under him, there was a string of precum connecting his dick to the sheets. I pulled the finger out and watched the hole wink at me. I told him to push out again; this time about half my tongue went inside him. I kept eating him for about five more minutes before trying two fingers. I was surprised when they went in with no problem. I pulled them out and tried for three; there was a little resistance for a minute, then it was okay.
"I think you're ready" I said softly.
"Yeah, I think so too" he said kind of trance-like.
I got the Astroglide from beside the last condom and lubed him up, then put the condom on myself. I didn't try to push it into him, I just lined it up with his dent and told him to push back at his own pace. He tried a couple of times but it wasn't going in. I told him to take a deep breath, let it out, then push down like on the toilet and push back toward me. I heard him suck in a big breath, let it out and then in nothing flat I was inside him. The temptation to pound the shit out of him was greater than anything I'd felt, but I'd promised him I'd be gentle so I practiced incredible restraint. I waited while I felt him getting accustomed to me. At first, he just squeezed and released, then he started to move just millimeters back and forth. After what felt like forever, he started pushing back and didn't stop this time until his fuzzy ass cheeks were touching me. I pushed in to make sure I had my whole length inside him. I started off slow, but his hole was relaxing quickly now.
"Please fuck me!" he said. I took him at his word and began to increase in speed and force.
"Harder. Pound me like they do in the internet porn videos" he said. Once again, I followed orders and began to slam into him making loud slapping sounds every time I hit bottom. He stopped that after a couple of times. I guess it wasn't as fun as it looked in the videos. After a few minutes he started sliding down onto his stomach. I followed along with him and turned him kind of halfway onto his side and pushed his right leg up so it was bent, opening up his ass for me. I kept it up in this position for a few minutes, but I really wanted him face to face so I turned him over onto his back and held him by his beefy thighs.
"Tell me when" I said as I began to try to line up with his prostate. I stroked, then adjusted, stroked, adjusted until he made a little animal sound and I knew I had the angle right. I set up a rhythm and let my dick beat the hell out of his love nut. He started jacking himself slowly and I watched as the precum coming out the end of it left a slimy mess from his navel down into his pubes. The whole experience was putting me in danger of cumming at any second. I picked up speed and so did he; his hand was almost a blur now. His actions were causing him to involuntarily squeeze his sphincter tight and the extra friction was all it took to drive me over the cliff.
"OH FUCK! JESUS! TERRY! JAMES! WHATEVER! OH GOD!!!" I practically yelled as I filled the latex tube wrapped around my dick. I slammed every micron I could inside him and watched as his dick exploded and line after line of pearly white cum made slashes across is stomach and up between his man tits. I made a conscious decision to copy what he'd done to me last time. I collapsed on top of him and let his fluids coat both of us as I sought out his mouth for more kisses. I laid my head next to his after a few minutes, still trying to catch my breath.
"Dude...I'm sorry...not to pressure you...but...I fucking love you" he whispered in my ear. I lifted my head so I could look into his eyes. They were gorgeous, blue like a summer sky or glacial ice.
"I...don't...I'm not sure...fuck...I think I love you too" I said, still fearful to actually commit. We went back to kissing and at some point, fell asleep. When we woke up a little later on, we were glued together; a mess of hair and dried cum. It kind of hurt pulling it apart. We managed to get loose and went and took a shower together and washed it all away. We didn't say much. I was afraid I'd said too much already. Once we were clean, we went back and got under the crusty sheet and slept the rest of the night; this time with him `big spooning' me.
Way too soon the weekend was over and I was going to have to face my very real problem back at 308. I stayed with the reset James until lunchtime Sunday. He wanted to go out and get food, but knowing what was coming I didn't really have any kind of appetite.
I was sitting at the desk finishing the last of my homework when Bernie finally came in. All he said was hey. He got some clothes and went straight to the shower; no doubt to wash the smell of Victor off of him. It was really too late for that; he was reeking of sex when he walked through the door. He seemed very nervous when he got back and I tried to ignore it; putting off the confrontation as long as I could.
"I think we need to talk" he said. Oh boy, here it comes.
"You mean about where you really were the last four days?" I said. He looked like I slapped him. "I was wondering if you really thought I was an idiot."
"What?" he asked, trying to play dumb.
"I went to meet the bus Thursday evening. I saw you with Victor at the same time you were telling me about being broken down" I said.
"Oh God..." he said, looking sick.
"Then, I was across the street from Morgan House when you texted me about being on the way to sit with your sick mother" I told him.
"I'm sorry" he said, "I didn't want to hurt you. I don't know what else to say..."
"It doesn't really matter anymore" I told him.
"It's just...I thought you and me were so good together...until I got with Victor, anyway" he said.
"Yeah, I know. I was really infatuated with you. Hell, I thought I loved you until I figured out it was just because you were my first, I guess" I said. He was quiet for a long time; sitting there looking at his hands. "So where does it go from here?"
"Victor wants me to move in with him" he almost whispered. I nodded. Even though I already knew it was over, I still felt stinging hot water coming into my eyes.
"Fine. Go. I don't own you and you don't owe me anything" I said bitterly. We didn't speak a word the rest of the night.
That was the last night we spent together. The following morning, we went to class as usual, but that evening when I got in, he'd moved all his stuff out. I had sadness, but at the same time, the rational side of me knew it was for the best. I was still moping around the dorm when James texted wanting to know how it went. I didn't feel like texting all that. I just texted back `Call me'.
We talked for an hour at least. He kept telling it was a good thing, he was in love with me, we could move in together; but I kept wondering if his feelings for me were because I was his first, the way it was with me and Bernie. I decided it was best for us not to move in together yet; I needed time. There was still about a month before the end of the semester, but I figured I could handle it by myself. What I didn't count on was craving intimacy so much that in the end, either James slept at 308 or I was at his place almost every night.
I finally made an unsteady peace with Jai. We talked things out before class one day. I accepted his apology and he accepted that he and I were not going to be anything more than friends. He decided that was good enough. I was walking with him between classes when Bernie and Victor breezed by us. Bernie barely acknowledged me.
"I guess Bernie found his bear after all" Jai said.
Relatives were coming to the family house for Thanksgiving, so mom came to pick me up earlier than I would have liked. I kissed James and sent him out ahead of me before I went down to get in the car. It was just mom and me all the way back to Oneida, so I made a snap decision.
"Mom...can I tell you something and promise you won't freak out?" I said.
"How can I promise that, when I don't know what you're going to tell me" she said.
"True. I guess" I said.
"I promise I'll try not to freak out. But if its about you being gay, I already know" she said, taking the wind out of my sails.
"You know?" I asked. "Did JJ..."
"No, JJ didn't say anything; don't blame it on him. I'm your mother. Mothers just know things" she said. "For instance, I'm betting it wasn't any coincidence that cute blonde boy with the blue eyes came out just before you did."
"James" I said, "and no, not a coincidence, I sent him out first, trying to be discreet."
"He's...James is cute, is he a good guy?" she asked.
"He's...uh...a work in progress, but yeah. I think he's going to be a really good guy" I said.
"Listen Teddy, I think your dad still has designs on you carrying on the family name and having a house full of grandkids. Let me handle him for you, if you don't mind" she said.
I leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "I'd hug you so hard I'd pick you up off the ground if you weren't driving" I said, "I love you mom."
"I love you too, Teddy. I'll make dad understand, just leave it to me" she said.
The remainder of the trip was a combination of asking me about my classes and other friends, then she would come back to some detail or another about James. It was weird being so open with her but I kind of liked it. Now I had two confidants in the family. I felt like I had a lot to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
After the Thanksgiving break, I let JJ come back with me for a few days since I had unused space (sort of). He and James hit it off from the start. That fortified my feelings about James, since JJ had a kind of sixth sense when it came to judging people's character. We all went out and I showed JJ around the campus and some of the sights of Nashville. All three of us had a blast. Sunday afternoon, we put JJ on a bus back to mom and dad's and that night we made up for the days he'd been unintentionally cock-blocking.
The last day of classes would be December 10th and we had to be out of the dorm before the 19th. I felt bad leaving because James had found out that his parents were going to Europe for Christmas; he was going to be stuck at home alone. Mom and dad came up Friday the 17th to pick me and my stuff up; pulling a little U Haul trailer behind the Tahoe. I told James to hold on while I ran to the car. I explained the situation to them and before I had even asked mom said `tell him to pack fast'. I ran back over (with JJ on my heels) and we told him he was coming with us. He didn't need to pack anything, since he had two changes of clothes in his stay over bag. We'd already stored his dorm stuff at a self-storage place near campus; something I should have done, actually.
About an hour into the trip, JJ had fallen asleep against the passenger side window. Without his mouth running, it was very quiet in the car. I was leaning against the window on my side and James was trying to stay in the middle to avoid any suspicions. I kept hearing mom and day talking to each other in low voices but couldn't really hear what they were saying, until dad spoke up.
"So, Teddy. You and James are...boyfriends?" he asked in a very confused dad tone of voice. I could feel the heat in my face as I blushed. Apparently, mom had been working on him.
"Yes, sir" I said, waiting for his next statement to come. When it did, I was totally surprised.
"When your mom and I were dating, we stayed all over each other. We were like Siamese twins. Are you sure you guys like each other?" he said.
James and I looked at each other and then at my dad. Then James wrapped his big beefy bear arm around me and drew me in close. I watched dad's eyes in the rearview mirror. I think he was actually okay with it. I kind of relaxed and laid my head over onto James' shoulder.
"That's more like it" dad said. I looked down and saw mom's hand in his. He turned on the radio and scanned until he found one of those stations playing nothing but Christmas music. I felt so utterly content I just drifted off with my head on James' shoulder and his leaned over on top of mine.
Lambodara 11/21/21
lambodara@protonmail.com