Hello, this email contains the next addition to my work "big time rush" in the gay male / celebrity section of the archive. All required disclaimers are located in the body of the text below.
Sincerely,
-R
Big Time Rush 15
Chapter 15: Big Time Dilemma
Disclaimer: I do not own nor am am I affiliated with Big Time Rush (BTR), Viacom, or Nickelodeon. This is a work of fiction and is for entertainment only.
This work contains acts of homosexuality, so if you're offended by such material then leave now.
No one under the age of 18 or 21 (Check your local laws) is permitted to read this material.
Note: well it has been a while. Sorry about such a long wait. I wasn't really sure about what I was going to do with this. chapter. I had a bad case of writers block, then when I started writing this chapter out, I didn't like anything I was putting down at all. I decided to take a new approach to the story and the characters, you'll see what I mean. I've gotten some feedback regarding character buildup, and though I do have the characters as they are in the show, remember that what I am trying to do is bring a whole other side of character we don't see, a difference that is seen in a more intimate setting, something the show doesn't get into enough, so you could say I'm expanding on it. Well guys, get ready for an epic chapter.
One day remaining at the hotel. The boys were going to try and enjoy what they could of San Francisco before they had to head back home. Carlos and Logan decided to spend their day separate, leaving Kendall and James to do their own thing together.
James and Kendall headed deep into the city and observe the different culture of the area. As they were walking around taking in their surroundings, James couldn't help but wonder why Kendall wasn't as affectionate as Carlos. They were happy together, but they seemed to be missing the special spark.
There was love between the two, but James just didn't feel like it was working out to his liking, Kendall's love seemed empty, and James just didn't feel like he was being loved enough. They hadn't had sex in a while, and Janes was desperately horny. He started thinking maybe he wasn't as good looking as he thought. The two arrived at a store and stopped. Joe was standing inside of the store and Kendall was just looking right at her. James grabbed Kendall by the shoulder but James didn't react.
After an awkward two minutes, Kendall finally started walking away. James was going to say something, but just kept his mouth shut not uttering a word. The two walked on in silence, Kendall oblivious to James' upset face. They made their way to a restaurant where they had an early lunch together. There was a brief moment of silence before James began to speak his mind.
"Babe. Can I ask you a question?" James asked hesitantly.
"Um yeah." Kendall replied making his goofy face.
"Do you really love me?" James looked right into Kendall's eyes.
Kendall didn't respond right away. He frowned and look right back. "what's that supposed to mean?"
"You've been ignoring me lately. It started out all so nice, but you don't even look at me the same anymore." James looked down at his hands.
"Hey knock it off." Kendall sharply replied. "If I didn't love you, we wouldn't be together right now would we."
"Like you and Joe?" James hissed back.
"Is that what this is all about, really? You're jealous because she's just appeared all over again?" Kendall was angry.
James couldn't muster up the courage to respond. He wasn't a fighter, and he knew he wasn't as strong as Kendall. He just kept looking down at his hands trying to hold back tears. Before Kendall could speak again James stormed out of the restaurant. Kendall put both of his hands up in frustration and confusion. He sighed when he saw a familiar face walk in the restaurant, a long faced Joe...
Meanwhile back at the hotel room, Carlos and Logan were just cuddled up on the couch watching a movie. Logan was still hurt and found he felt more stable when in the arms of his lovely boyfriend. Logan was slightly discouraged when Carlos just got up and walked away.
He was trying to think what was happening when out of nowhere Carlos came from begin an jumped on Logan playfully. The bother laughed and their faces met. Carlos kissed Logan's nose and grabbed it saying "honk" and thy both laughed. When Logan looked, Carlos was holding a huge stuffed dog.
"What's this?" Logan asked.
"I think it's a stuffed puppy!" Carlos said in a childish tone.
"I know that." Logan said in a catty attitude. "What I mean is what is it for?"
"For you." Carlos said with a huge smile on his face. "Whenever you feel bad an sad look at this puppy! Think of kittens and cute little bunnies, an all thing soft, cuddly, and furry."
Logan laughed as a tear rolled out of his left eye. "Awe thanks baby. It's different, but I love it."
Carlos wrapped his arms around Logan and kissed him on the forehead. Just as the two were about to cuddle up together, James walked in the door upset.
"What's wrong?" Carlos asked.
"The faster we get out of this city, the better." James said heading towards the kitchen.
Carlos and Logan shrugged their shoulders and continued to cuddle up. Logan looked right into Carlos' eyes and smiled.
"I just wanted to say thank you." Logan said.
Carlos looked at Logan and smiled back. "Thanks for what baby?"
Logan squeezed Carlos. "For giving me the chance to earn your heart. I love you, and I can't thank you enough for everything you have done. It really means a lot to me."
"Awe. Baby I love you. You're my Logie Bear." Carlo chuckled.
"Just like you're my little Carlocito!" Logan pecked Carlos on the lips.
Logan started tickling Carlos and they both started chuckling. Little to their knowledge James was looking at the two acting playfully. It was such a beautiful sight. He couldn't help but admire what they were doing. James brought his hands to his face and sat down in the kitchen.
A few minutes had passed and Logan headed over to the bathroom. Carlos went to the kitchen area to get some water when he saw James sitting down hiding tears.
"Hey what's wrong James?" Carlos asked wrapping his hand around James.
"You and Logan are so lucky." James said.
"What do you mean?" Carlos asked. "You guys were so happy."
"Yeah, but he's not like you." James stood up and got close to Carlos pushing him towards the wall.
"Stop. What are you doing?" Carlos asked beginning to panic.
James put his hand right in the center of Carlos' chest and started rubbing the firm muscles. Carlos tried to free himself but he was forced right back in place. He saw of look of lust and great desire in James' eyes. Before he could wiggle away James leaned forward am played a kiss on Carlos' lips. James reached for Carlos' crotch when he was finally pushed away. James was taken away by Carlos' raw power. He tried to swoop in again but was violently shoved into the wall.
James snapped out of his trance and fell to the ground holding his head as tears started rolling down his face uncontrollably.
"I just wanna be loved. That's all I've ever wanted. Am I ugly or something? Is that why he doesn't seem to care about me?" James continued to sob. "I don't know what to do anymore."
Carlos managed to hold back his anger when he saw one of his closest friends broken down, it broke his heart and he started to cry as well. Just as they were crying together, Logan walked out completely clueless. He looked at the two in utter confusion.
"What they hell happened?" Logan asked as his face twisted up.
Carlos was going to reply when James stood up grabbing Logan by the arms.
"Please don't say anything to Kendall." James pleaded. "Please don't say anything to him. I don't know what to do. He doesn't pay any attention to me anymore. He won't even cuddle with me at night. You two have such a beautiful love connection."
Before anyone else could say anything else, James walked away trying to pull himself together. James headed back out into town and ended up finding himself at the pier. He was leaning against one if the rails looking out into the water taking in the fresh breeze as the crisp air blew through his hair.
"Oh my God, James is that you?" A voiced asked from behind.
James turned around and as he did his eyes opened wide. James couldn't help but smile when he met eyes with a very familiar face. Taylor Lautner was standing in front of him looking fabulous as always.
"Oh my God!" James blurted out as he hugged Taylor.
Taylor couldn't help but smile when he looked back at James. "It is so nice to see you again. What are you doing here?"
"I had the show remember?" James asked shyly.
"Yeah I know. I saw the show, it was amazing." Taylor said. "What I meant is what are you doing here right now?
"Oh, just out here. You know." James rubbed his forearm in a shy manner.
"So where is your boyfriend, Kenneth?" Taylor asked.
"You mean Kendall? He's not here." James as needed as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Um it um, ugh, it is kinda hard to explain."
"Oh." Taylor said looking towards the ground. "Um so do you wanna head somewhere more private so we can I don't know talk a little more?"
"Um I don't know." James was uneasy.
"Hey I understand. Look here's my new number. Call me sometime. I won't be here much longer." Taylor said.
James took the number and put it in his back pocket. "Sounds great. I'm leaving later soon myself. I'll be back in Los Angeles soon muself."
"Oh cool, I'm still there for another two weeks. I guess I'll see you around." Taylor said as he hugged James again.
James felt his knees grow weak. He was smitten by the feeling and couldn't help but fall victim to the blissful feeling. He couldn't help but not wanting to let go. It was an awkward moment afterwards with both young men blushing at the same time as they walked in deprecate directions.
The boys where gathered up in the bus as they started heading back home. It was going to be another long drive. Carlos and Logan were Cuddled up as usual. James and Kendall were on opposite sides of the bus. James didn't bother to approach Kendall, and Kendall didn't bother to approach him either and it hurt him deep inside. He had feelings for Kendall, but the entire trip he just kept thinking about Taylor. He reached for the paper and punched the numbers into his phone.
James looked at his phone and couldn't hold it back anymore. He sent a text to Taylor.
James: Yo Taylor, it's James.
Taylor: :D Oh hey what's up buddy xD
James: On my tour bus with the guys.
Taylor: Cool, so what's good?
James: Not much. Just u knw tryn to figure things out.
Taylor: so can I ask what is goin on wit u and him?
James: a lot, don't knw how much longer I can deal wit it, kinda hard u knw
Taylor: :( I'm sorry to hear that. Ur really sweet and totally cute, u don't see serve to b mistreated
James: :D really?
Taylor: dude you are like totally cute :)
James: Thanks <3
Taylor: <3
James put the phone back in his pocket and rested his eyes with a huge smile on his face. He snoozed off and he started such a beautiful dream.
James was sitting under a poetic moon. There was no cloud in sight. A night sky filled with stars and the gleaming full moon casting a loving essence over the sand. The small crystals in the San created a heavenly blue tint. It was under the romantic night sky a beautiful loving couple was under the sky. James' eyes were closed as he felt subtle luscious lips against his. The feeling was so real. He opened his eyes only to see a shirtless Taylor Lautner locking lips with him. James was lost in his own sea of passion and happiness. He ran his hand down the center of Taylor's chest feeling the firm muscular pecs.
James could feel the heart beating under his hand. He moved his hand lower onto the perfect chiseled rock hard abs. James was in Heaven. He began lowering his head to the relative band of the boxer briefs. Just as he hand slipped under the waistband James woke up. He had a boner and he was trying to hide it. He hated how the dream ended, but could do nothing but smile as he closed his eye again.
The boys had arrived back at the Palm Woods. Kendall and James got back to their room first. Carlos and Logan headed out to their room to cuddle up for a little. James sat on his bed looking at Kendall waiting for the silence to break.
"So I guess you have nothing to say." James pouted
"What in the hell is your freaking problem?" Kendall snarled back. "Seriously, you've been acting like a total jerk."
James was taken away. "Me a jerk? Well at least I don't ignore my own boyfriend."
"What are you talking about?" Kendall asked now growing irate.
"Ever since that bit h got back you've given me no attention!" James yelled back.
"Don't you say that about her!" Kendall stood up.
"Oh my God, how could I be so stupid?" James asked. "You still love her, how could I not see it." James covered his face.
"No, it's not like that." Kendall blurted out.
"It's over Kendall. Face it, it's over." James said as he started to cry."
"No have, please don't. I promise it's not like that, please believe me. Baby please don't leave me." Kendall started to cry.
"It's too late Kenny." James said. "I'm sorry, but I just can't do it anymore."
"Please, can't you just give me another. Chance, I'm sorry." Kendall fell to his knees grabbing James' hands.
James took a deep breath. "No."
James stood up and walked out of the room pulling out his phone and sending out a text. Carlos and Logan were in the hallway, they heard everything. Carlos walked forward and gave James a strong bro hug. The boys could hear Kendall breaking down into tears. He was crying loudly. Logan couldn't take it any longer and went to go comfort Kendall. Logan walked into the room and crouched down and hugged Kendall. He held him as Kendall started crying out and muttering out words that couldn't be understood.
Three hours had passed when James arrived in the Hotel lobby just waiting. After what seemed like an eternity Taylor came into the room. He saw James and sat down next to him.
"I told you I'd be here as fast as I could be. What's wrong?" Taylor asked.
"I broke up with him." James said wiping his face.
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Hey sorry not to get off topic, but isn't that the bracelet I got you." Taylor had asked.
"Oh, yeah." James said with a smile.
"So, you wanna maybe grab something to eat in a more intimate setting, away from everything?" Taylor asked as he began to blush.
"I'd love that." James said as he stood up.
The two made eye contact and Taylor wiped the tears from James' eyes. There was a minor pause before they started walking back waiting for the valet to bring the car back.
Back at the apartment Kendall had stopped crying and moved his things over into the bedroom his mom and Katie shared. He was laying down listening to his iPod. Carlos and Logan were sitting in the living room on the couch cuddled up as usual. Half an hour had passed when Kendall sat down in the living room, his eyes red and moist. It was obvious he was still crying. Carlos and Logan felt bad for Kendall swing him in such a state and the both walked over to him and sat around him. He looked at Carlos and then at Logan and smiled as the wrapped their arms around him. The comforted him as the TV just played away.
James and Taylor were sitting down in a casual setting in an outdoor area of the restaurant. The sun was setting, and it cast a breathtaking orange hue in the sky. The color created a delicate glow over the flowering vines. The flowers were gorgeous. They were purple with yellow lining. James looked at the vineyard like setup and couldn't help but admire the beauty of it.
"It's a beautiful place isn't it?" Taylor asked.
"It's gorgeous." James said. "I never knew this place was even here.
"Neither did I at first. Ended up here completely on accident one day. Now I come here every time I'm in the city. It helps to get away from the chaos and everything else. It's a really relaxing place." Taylor started smiling as the waiter came over.
The two had ordered their food and a guy came in and the regulars greeted him. The elderly man walked over to the piano and a waitress brought him a martini. The older man sat down and started playing a beautiful song on the piano. The setting had become even more enchanting. As the music played, Taylor was lost in James' beautiful eyes. James himself was completely taken by the beauty of Taylor.
Taylor was delighted when the food had arrived and he saw James' face look at everything in front of them. They enjoyed their meal smiling back at one another laughing very often.
"It was really nice meeting back up with you." Taylor chuckled.
"It has been nice. I really wish this could last longer." James answered back.
"Oh but it can be." Taylor grabbed James' hand. "Give me a chance. I can prove it."
James could only smile. "Well, I don't know know. You're an awesome guy, but I'm just not sure. It's kind of I don't know."
"Hey I would never force you to do something you don't want to do." Taylor said.
The continued to smile at each other as the sun continued to set. The laughed and talked until closing time, neither side aware of the hour. Their encounter was short lived, and it felt like only minutes had trickled by. At that exact moment everything was beautiful.