Borrowed Time

Borrowed Time by Traumarei

Part 6. Borrowed Time

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction.

Warning note: While this isn't the end of the story, this section marks a turn toward the more serious. I'm not saying there won't continue to be some sex, but if your chief interest is stroke material, you may want to look elsewhere.

The summer after 8th grade was long and slow.

All the guys had vacations that year with their families, and it seemed like the different vacations were scattered at different times all through the summer. On top of that, everyone had different summer schedules and activities. Karl's folks had insisted on him putting in hours helping to stock their sports goods store. Jerry was busy with a local computer camp. Several of the guys had sports. But they kept getting together, mostly because Paul made it happen. Not as often as they had before, or as much as Jerry had hoped when he thought about this summer, but once or twice a week. Most of the time, Jerry noticed, Trevor didn't show up.

It was early in August. Trevor and Karl had both been gone several weeks on family trips. It was the first get-together since Karl got back, and Jerry was giving him a welcome-back blow job. He'd decided that if he was going to be gay, he should take what chances he could safely get to figure out how to do them okay with the guys, before he hit the singles scene the way he hoped to do in high school. Jimmy wasn't there, so it was easy enough for him to volunteer to take care of it as a "special occasion" for Karl, without (he thought) blowing his cover too much. (If Jimmy was there, everyone knew he would go for it, though come to think of it Jerry had noticed Jimmy volunteering less in the last couple of months.)

Jerry was just starting to get going pretty well when the door opened, and in walked Trevor.

"Jesus fucking Christ, what a bunch of faggots!" he shouted, when he saw what they were doing.

Jerry, shocked, pulled off and looked at him. Karl quickly tucked himself away and buttoned up his jeans.

"Jerry I can see sucking someone off, since he's a faggot and all, but why you gotta get all faggotty with him, Karl? It ain't gonna do your jock reputation any good if it gets out that you like blow jobs from guys.

"And you two perverts, stroking off while you watch them. Whatta bunch of losers!"

Jerry spared a quick glance at Paul. He looked furious. Before he could say anything, though, Dale spoke.

"Better watch out who you're calling a faggot here," he said in an even voice. "Don't say things that could come back and bite you in the ass."

Out of the corner of his eye, Jerry saw Trevor's face go quickly from red to white. "All you motherfuckers are faggots anyway," he said as he slammed the door on his way out.

Paul joked around and tried to get them back into the spirit of things, but it didn't work. Karl quickly left. Dale and Jerry followed soon after, leaving Paul to watch a porn his brother had gotten him on the TV.

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Two days after that, Jerry's family left on vacation. They were gone two weeks. Then after they got back, there was only a little over a week left to get ready for school, with three of the guys gone Labor Day weekend. So Jerry was already back in school before his next chance came up to get together and jerk off with the guys.

The first day of high school was chaos. None of the freshmen knew where they were going. The maps weren't clear. Upperclassmen were quite pleased to give them wrong information every chance they could. Jerry considered it a miracle that he actually got to the right class each period, even if he was late to half of them.

Right after fourth period, Jerry saw Karl going the other direction in the hallway. "Karl!" he called. "Karl!"

"Yeah?" Karl's eyes searched until they saw him.

"Wanna come over to my house today? We can finish up that thing we started before I took off on vacation."

"What? Oh, yeah. Yeah! I'll, um, come over, first thing."

"Great!" Jerry was grinning. He'd been thinking about how to manage this ever since he got back.

Shortly after Jerry got home from school, he heard the doorbell ring. "Coming!" he called, and opened the door. It was Karl.

"Had to stop by the house and tell my mom I was coming over."

"Didn't say why did you?" Jerry gave a sly grin.

Karl snorted. "Not hardly. I can just imagine it: Mom, I need to go over to my friend's house to finish the blow job he started three weeks ago."

By now they were inside Jerry's room, with the door closed and locked, shucking off their shoes and socks. "That was what you meant, wasn't it?" asked Karl, with sudden uncertainty. "Finishing up that blow job you started?"

"Of course it was you jackass. Now pull down your trousers and let's get going. We only have a little while before my sister gets home."

Karl sat on the edge of Jerry's bed, then pulled his trousers and boxers down to his ankles and spread his legs. His six-inch cock jutted out from a tangle of dark pubic hairs.

Jerry got on his knees in front of him and grasped the base of his cock with the thumb and third finger of his right hand. Then he licked the tip of Karl's cock. The other boy moaned. He then took turns licking different spots on the top, bottom, and sides, using his fingers to turn the cock one way and then another. Karl moaned again and dug his fingers into the top of Jerry's shoulders.

Then Jerry opened his mouth and took the first two inches of Karl's cock into his mouth. Karl moaned louder this time as Jerry started moving up and down on his cock, his lips curled over his teeth, his tongue firmly pressed against the sensitive spot on the underside of Karl's cock. Up and down, up and down, up and down, while the fingers of his other hand tickled the underside of Karl's balls--

Karl stiffened, and his eyes widened. Suddenly, his hands were like vises on Jerry's shoulders. Jerry pulled back as far as he could, and suddenly his mouth was filling with warm cum. Deliberately, he kept moving through Karl's orgasm, his tongue flicking over Karl's skin. The other boy's moaning and gasped breath told him he was succeeding in making it feel really good for him.

Finally, Karl pulled him off. Jerry spit the cum into the paper cup on his nightstand. "Shit, that was great. Especially the part with the balls," he said.

He looked at the clock. "I suppose you're gonna say I have to do you now?"

"It's fine," said Jerry. "My treat."

Actually, it would have been a lot of fun to get a blow job from Karl, who didn't give them very often and had never given one to Jerry. But he thought that would probably be pushing things too much.

Karl looked at him, startled. Jerry noticed a kind of strange expression in his face, as if what Jerry said had made him suddenly nervous.

"Okay. I guess I'll see you at school." With that, Karl started quickly putting himself together again. Half a minute later, he was running down the stairs and out the door.

Jerry spent the next half hour jerking off, reliving the look on Karl's face when he came. He would have taken even longer, except that he miscalculated and pushed himself over the top quicker than he had wanted. It was just as well, he thought; it was already past time for his sister to show up, and she had a bad habit of talking to him in his room when she was bored. He sighed, cleaned up, and unlocked his door.

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Three days later, Dale showed up at Jerry's house after football practice. Jerry got a snack for both of them, then at Dale's request they went up to Jerry's room. They talked for a couple of minutes about classes and high school. Then a pause fell.

"Karl thinks you're gay," Dale said.

"That's a lie." The answer was automatic.

Dale shook his head. "You know it's not a lie," he said. "I know it. And Karl suspects."

Slowly, Jerry sat down on his bed. He hadn't imagined his secret coming out, not like this, not so soon. He'd barely started high school. What would the next four years be like?

"I ain't gonna tell anyone," Dale added, sitting in Jerry's computer chair. He grinned faintly. "Fact of that, I suspect I've done more gay stuff than you have, even though I'm not gay."

"How'd you know?" Jerry whispered.

Dale shifted. "I started to wonder when you gave me that blow job. It was like, something weird going on. Then when I came by later to apologize, it was like..." He paused, as if he was searching for the right words. "Like you weren't just mad, but sad too. Like I spoiled something you'd been looking forward to. And so I guessed." He shrugged.

"It don't make no difference to me whether you are or aren't. But I know you are." He gave his trademark smirk.

"Why not? You gay too?" Jerry could hardly believe what he was asking.

Dale laughed. "Not a chance. You're a cool guy, Jer. I like you, but not like that. You're cool. Not hot." He snickered. "I got a brother that's gay. Older brother, from my dad's first marriage. I don't think you ever met him. He's cool too."

Jerry breathed a sigh of relief. For the present, it looked like his life wasn't over yet. "What about the others?" he asked.

Dale shook his head. "Like I said, Karl thinks he knows, but he won't hassle you about it. See," he said slowly, "I think maybe Karl's gay, too. It really freaked him out when you blew him and didn't try to get him to blow you after. Made him think maybe you were doing it cause you wanted to, cause you were gay. Which made him think maybe he was gay, cause he wanted to suck you too. I think." He smirked.

"Jesus," breathed Jerry.

"Too right," said Dale. "You know how freakin' religious Karl's folks are. They get a whiff he's gay, they'll lock him up till he's 18, or maybe more like 45. They done a real number on him. We got him to loosen up, with the jerkoff group and all, but thinking maybe he's gay makes him freak out again. So now he thinks maybe you're gay, he likes you, but you make him really nervous."

"Should I talk to him about it?"

"Jesus no. He'll really freak then."

"But he talked to you about it."

Dale laughed. "You think Karl told me all this? I had to use pliers practically just to get him to say what happened with you, and that took me three days. All this is stuff I'm guessing. I think I'm probably right, though."

"If you thought you were wrong, it wouldn't be what you thought, asshole." Dale smirked.

"So what about Paul?"

"Paul..." Dale said thoughtfully. "Paul likes sex. Didya know that Trevor came by again, a couple of days after that big blowout at the beginning of August? He and Paul got into this big fucking argument about whether we were all faggots for messing around like we do. Paul told him that he was the one who kept talking about faggots, so maybe he was one himself. Trevor tried to punch him. They don't get along too well no more."

"You said something about Trevor not saying things that could bite him in the ass."

"Noticed that, did you?" Dale paused. "There's all kinda stuff that's not right in Trevor's family. Stuff with his uncles and cousins, and one of his brothers as well. I know about it, because...well. I think that's a big part of Trevor's problem, all that shit that's going on there. But he's bein' an asshole about it. Saying he would tell other people about what we've been doing, get them to think we're all gay. I had to remind him that if he wants to talk, he's got more to lose than we do.

"Besides, he don't really know for sure. He said you were a faggot, just because he thought he could take you in a fight. Said Jimmy was a faggot, too." He grinned. "You didn't see him calling me or Paul or Karl faggots, though, not until he got really mad and started sayin' even stupider shit than he was sayin' before. He knows we could wipe the ground with him."

Jerry shivered. "That's no help if he goes around saying I'm gay."

Dale shook his head. "I took care of it. Told him if said one word about it, I'd let out a few bits I know that would fuck up his reputation really good. He won't be hanging around us no more, but he knows to keep quiet."

"Why do you care?"

"Because all our reputations go up or down together. We've been hanging out since sixth grade. Anything someone sticks on one of us, it's gonna stick to all of us sooner or later. Besides, all that's crap. Like I said, gay or straight, it don't matter to me. Whatever vibrates your joystick."

"Jimmy?"

"Jimmy's straight. He's just horny. It won't bother him none if you're gay, unless he thinks the other kids'll give him shit for it. That happens, he'll stay away from you."

"Like Paul?"

"Not really the same." Dale paused. "See, like I said, Paul likes sex. He likes to do everything with his friends. When he found out about sex, he decided he wanted to do it with his friends." Dale shrugged. "Maybe he's partly gay. He don't wanna be gay, though, and he don't wanna admit there's part of him that likes sex with boys. So for right now he tells himself it's just playing around. He got mad at Trevor 'cause Trevor saying it's gay makes him kinda worry inside that maybe it is, except he don't wanna think about that. So now he's gotta keep on doin' it, cause if he stopped it now that Trevor said something, it'd mean that Trevor's right and it's all gay." He laughed. "Paul's pretty screwed up."

"Everybody's screwed up, according to you. Except you."

"Never fear, I'm just as screwed up as everyone else. You just don't see it cause I'm not sitting here sayin' shit about myself."

"So I don't tell Paul I'm gay?"

"Not a fuckin' chance. If you do, that'll bust everything. Just go along with things. Sooner or later, he'll get a girlfriend who'll put out, blow jobs at least, and then this stuff'll all be history. Until then, stick around for the ride. Just keep acting like it's all normal. You get weird and stop coming out, Paul'll think maybe there's something to wonder about. You don't want that to happen."

Dale left soon after that.

Jerry spent the rest of the evening thinking about how closely the other boy had observed the rest of them. It had surprised him. He'd always liked Dale, but hadn't ever spent much time with him aside from the group get-togethers. Actually, it was kind of scary, or would be if he didn't think Dale was his friend. Dale might not be as smart as Jerry at school stuff, but he got how people worked. Each time while he was talking about one of their friends, it was like it all unfolded in Jerry's mind and suddenly he understood more about them than he ever had before. It gave him a lot to think about.

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Things went down pretty much the way Dale had said they would.

Now that high school had started, all the guys were going their own separate ways. Still, Paul insisted that they get together once a week to mess around, usually at his house now. He didn't seem to notice, or pretended not to notice, that aside from those weekly get-togethers they really didn't have that much in common anymore.

Things kept on pretty much the way they had been, with jerking off and jerking each other off and blow jobs every now and then. Paul was always there. Dale, Karl, and Jerry were there most of the time, Jimmy was there about half the time--whenever he didn't show he had some excuse, usually having to do with the school paper, but Jerry thought the other boy was trying to slowly find ways to distance himself from the group.

Then Paul got a new girlfriend just before Christmas, and the get-togethers stopped. Paul actually took him aside, looking embarrassed, and after making sure no one else could hear what they were saying, gave Jerry this weird talk about how they'd all been such good friends, and it was great how they'd been able to spend so much time together, and how he hoped Jerry'd never felt pressured to do something he wasn't happy about, and about how important it was to him that they were still friends, even though they were all going their different ways and getting girlfriends and stuff.

All of which Jerry interpreted as meaning that now Paul had a girlfriend, he felt guilty and a bit weirded out about having been the ringleader so often in their group jacking off sessions, and he was hoping no one thought he was gay because it had all been perfectly normal, except that now he had a girlfriend it WASN'T going to happen again and he really REALLY hoped Jerry wouldn't ever say anything about it, ever. The really funny thing was that Paul managed to go through the whole conversation without ever using the words sex, masturbation, jacking off, blow jobs, or anything else that might have helped someone listening--if there had been anyone--figure out what the hell he was talking about. Usually, Jerry envied Paul his self-assurance, but not now. If Jerry himself hadn't been so nervous about the whole thing, it would have been really hilarious.

Thinking about the conversation afterwards, at first Jerry wondered why he hadn't been more surprised or disappointed about the whole thing: the ending of the jacking-off group, Paul's embarrassment about the whole thing, and realizing that after almost three years of doing sex things with his friends, he was back to using his hand again--or actually for the first time, since he'd had his first orgasm jacking off with the other guys that first time. Then he realized that in the back of his mind, he'd known this day would come for almost a year, ever since he realized that he really was gay and his friends weren't. He'd been having his fun on borrowed time, and now it had run out.

Author's Note: No, this isn't the end of the story, though now (finally!) it's come clear, if it wasn't already, why this story has the name it does.

(c) 2008 by Traumarei. All rights reserved.

Other stories I've had posted on Nifty include:

• After School (Gay: Masturbation)

NOTE: This also includes "After School with Friends," the beginning of a story about what happens once Kyle starts inviting his other middle school friends into his after school sessions.

• Church Overnighter (Gay: Young Friends)

• Good Friends (Gay: High School)

• Little Brother (Gay: Incest)

• Middle School Empath (Gay: Science Fiction or Fantasy)

• Old Pornographer (Gay: Masturbation)