Welcome! Here are the legal statements. If you are not above the legal age limit where you live, or if it is unlawful to view such material where you live, please leave now. If the subject of Homosexuality offends you, go no further. This story deals with Homosexuals and cross gendered individuals. They deserve the same respect that everyone deserves.
This story is true, however I have changed the names of some individuals due to their highly visible profiles these days. The Author reserves all rights, copyright 2000.
The Author is Terrence Julian with input from Andrew van Ryan's memories of the events detailed within. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here is part four of 'Boys Dare not Dance!'. We pick up where Andy and I arrived at April's home in San Francisco................ ---------------------------------------------
Boys Dare not Dance!
"Adventures in Wonderland"
Part Three
by Terrence 'TJ' Julian
Copyright 2000. All Rights Reserved
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"Twinkle, twinkle, little bat!
How I wonder what you're at!'
You know the song, perhaps?" said the Mad Hatter.
"I've heard something like it," said Alice.
"It goes on, you know," The Hatter continued, "in this way:-----
'Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
'Twinkle, twinkle---'"
Lewis Carrol, 'Alice in Wonderland'
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I bounded up the stairs and into the open second floor doorway. I found, upon entering, a very comfortable looking flat with a large bay window at the front. The decor was very 'Hippy' and quite out of date, but I didn't mind. Having missed the 'Summer of Love', this was all very new to me. In fact, I had still been in Junior High when that all happened, so seeing the flat with it's hanging tapestries and dayglow Indian Mantra posters was again the type of adventure I was wanting.
"Wow, this is pretty cool!" I remarked.
"TJ, Where are you?" Andrew called from below. His voice echoed up the stairwell, sounding very distant. It reminded me of yelling inside the drainage channels that ran past the high school Andy and I had attended.
"Andy, come out of the storm drain!" I called down to him and laughed.
"Very funny!" He barked. His footsteps resonated as he made his way up to the open doorway. Stepping inside, his head swiveled around taking in the whole of the living room.
"Wow, this is different!" He remarked. "where's April?"
"Are you looking for April?" A male voice called out from the other room.
"Yeah" We replied in tandem.
"She lives on the fourth floor." The voice informed us. It took a long second for this to register.
"Oh, Sorry!" I said. "C'mon Andy! We're in the wrong flat!"
We nearly knocked each other down as we went out the door and ran up the winding stair case two more floors. April was standing in her doorway, waiting patiently.
"What happened?" She asked. "Did you get lost on the way up?"
"You could say we took the wrong turnoff." Andy remarked.
"I take it you met Bob the Hippy." April giggled.
"We didn't actually meet him." I said. "We just heard his voice from the other room."
"Telling us you lived on the fourth floor." Andy added.
April gave us a curious look. "What did you do, walk right into his apartment?"
"Not only did we enter his home, but we made comments on the way it was decorated, too!" Andy replied. "Didn't we, Terrence?"
I began to laugh. I couldn't believe the two of us had marched right into someone's house totally unannounced, wearing backpacks with sleeping bags and began making comments about his house!
"We musta' freaked the guy out!" I giggled.
"Probably not." April said in a offhand fashion. "Bob does a LOT of acid. He probably thought the two of you were just another hallucination!"
"Wow, a real holdover form the Summer of Love, eh?" Andy quipped.
"Oh, Bob was here long before that. He was a student over at Berkeley in 1961. Then sometime in '64 he ran into Ken Kesey and Furthur. Bob dropped acid on the bus with the Pranksters and that was it. By 1967, he was a roadie for the Dead and doing green Owsley by the handfuls. Now he stays in the house mostly. I think he took one trip too many and didn't quite get all the way home." April reported.
"Wow, I bet he knows some of the Beats!" I commented in awe of the person whose house we'd invaded. "He must if he knew Kesey."
"Knows." April corrected. "Ken's not dead, TJ!"
"Do you know Ken Kesey?" I asked.
"I've met him. Since you're so interested in the Beat Generation, I guess I should tell you that I've met Allen Ginsberg, Michael McClure and Lew Welch, before he killed himself. Bob the Hippy introduced me to all of them." April smiled.
"REALLY?!" I questioned. "You've met them?"
"Yep!" She quipped back at me. Looking at us with a sly smile, she asked "Don't you two want to take your backpacks off?"
"Oh, YES!" Andy said nearly shouting. "Please, before it attacks me again and throws me on the floor!"
April hadn't seen Andy's perfect pirouette on the sidewalk, so she glanced at him like he might be a bit unhinged.
"Here, TJ. Help me get this thing off." Andy said. I held onto his pack and he slipped out of it. Taking it from me he asked April "What should I do with it?"
"Oh, just toss it over there for now." She said, pointing to a wide area by the doorway. Without a pause, Andy tossed the pack and sleeping bag across the room. It landed with a 'Shhhoooommmpppp!...' exactly where April had been pointing.
"Oh, thank you!" He said turning to face her again. "That thing was beginning to get to me."
"I guess so..." She said sounding stunned. Turning to me, April asked "Does he take everything so literal?"
"Most things." I answered. "Like, Don't ever put up a sign that says 'wet floor'. He probably will."
April giggled and replied "I'll keep that in mind. Are you guys hungry?"
"Oh, Yes!" Andy said from across the room. He'd spotted her book shelf and had gone to inspect.
"I'm so hungry I could eat meat." He remarked. After an ever so slight pause, he added "....Almost."
"Oh, so you're vegetarians!" April said sounding excited.
"I am." Andrew stated. "TJ's not."
"No?" She wondered aloud and turned her attention my way.
"I eat anything." I said. "Well, almost anything."
"So if I fry up a big hunk of catfish, you'd eat it?" She inquired.
"No!" I shouted. "Those things are creepy looking! Besides, they're bottom fish! Who knows what they've been sucking up and eating. Yuck!"
"Well, if you've ever watched what most animals eat, you'd be sickened. Did you know that they feed bone meal to pigs and shoot cows full of hormones?" She asked me.
"You shouldn't eat that stuff, TJ!" Andy scolded. Turning to April he continued on.
"Besides, TJ has enough hormones already." He declared. "Sometimes I can't even pry him off me!"
"ME!" I exclaimed. "Who woke me up in the barn last night and scraped my butt raw?!"
As the words left my lips I felt my face already turning red. I had blurted the remark without thinking. Slapping both hands over my mouth, I turned towards April, just in time to watch her fold in half and collapse laughing onto the floor.
"TJ!" Andy gasped. "Where are your manners! You shouldn't talk like that in front of a lady!"
"You're the one talking about hormones, Andy! Besides, you did scrape my butt raw!" I cried out.
April curled up in a tight ball and rolled about. I noticed she was laughing so hard that tears were steaming down her cheeks! Her laughing had actually become just squeaks here and there.
"Well, I didn't scratch your ass on purpose!" Andy huffed. "Besides, YOU seemed to be having just as good a time as I was, TJ!"
"STOP! STOP!" April gasped from the floor. "Please, let me catch my breath!"
Andrew suddenly noticed April on the floor and cried out "Oh, my god! Are you having a seizure?"
This sent April into another laughing fit. She began waving her hand around in an attempt to get us to stop long enough to breathe. Andy didn't understand what she was doing and continued.
"What? What is it? Do you want something? Is it your medicine? That's it, you need your medicine! Where is it?" He said as he 'interpreted' her hand gestures. All the while, April was in hysterics, driven on by Andrews constant stream of questions. She started motioning at me and I understood perfectly.
"Andy!" I shouted. "She's laughing! Now, back off a minute so she can get her breath!"
"Laughing?!" He said, sounding completely astonished. "Well, If I had known that I'd havmmmurtfffffffff............" The last part of his sentence was muted as I put my hand over his mouth.
"Stop! Let the poor girl catch her breath!" I cried at him.
He suddenly went limp in the shoulders, letting them sag. I knew he'd be quiet now. I had learned there were times when the only way to silence him was by doing this. Whenever I did this, his reaction was always the same. He'd get a shocked expression for a short moment, then go limp. I could then take my hand away and he'd remain silent until told it was OK to speak again. Andy knew it meant he'd been babbling and he'd become embarrassed. I kidded him repeatedly about having 'Foot in Mouth' disease.
April started to regain her composure after getting a few deep breaths in.
"I'm Sorry." I apologized. "Andy didn't come equipped with an off switch."
April began laughing again for a brief moment. She finally gained her self control long enough to get up from the floor.
"I'd better go make us some lunch before the two of you start talking again." She asserted as she stood.
Andy had quietly returned to the bookcase, so I followed April into the kitchen. ` "I swear, TJ." she said. "You and Andy are a comedy in real life. Are you like this all the time?"
"I'm not." I replied. "Andy's usually worse. "
She turned and gazed at me while giggling.
"Is that possible?" She asked.
"Oh, I could tell you stories for days!" I remarked. "But that's why I love him so much. I'm always happy when I'm with him. He says I'm the thrill of his life, but I don't know how. He says I keep him sane, as if he were to begin with!"
"Well, I haven't laughed like that for years!" April said. "Andy wasn't even trying to be funny and I was on the floor!"
"Hmmm, yeah." I said thinking aloud. "He does that a lot. I'm not sure if he is or isn't aware of what he's doing. Just when I think I've got him figured out, I find I know nothing about him at all."
April and I continued talking about Andrew as she prepared lunch. It was a vegetarian meal, but I didn't mind. Like I said, I'll eat almost anything.
Andy was eventually noticed by his silence. I went to see what he was up to and discovered him sitting on the sofa, deeply concentrating on a piece of sheet music.
"Hey, lunch is ready!" I announced. Then I noticed the score he was looking at.
"What's that?" I asked, peeking over his shoulder.
"It's from Aaron Copeland's 'Rodeo'." He said thoughtfully. "It's the piece called 'Hoedown'. You remember it?"
"Sure!" I replied. "I love playing that. The themes are all based on American fiddle tunes."
April rounded the corner from the kitchen and saw us pouring over the score.
"So you play the violin, TJ?" She asked.
"Oh, yes. I have since I was seven." I informed her.
"My two roomates are with the San Francisco Symphony. They should be here soon. One plays cello and the other is a violinist also. Maybe you can show her how you play." April said. I noticed a tone in her voice that said she had doubts whether on not I could actually play.
'If she only knew how much I love to show off by playing!' I thought to myself. 'I wish I had MY violin here! That would really blow her roommates away.'
The violin I played as my primary instrument was a rare Alessadri Gagliano that I'd bought from an estate in Europe. It was nearly as old as the famed instruments of Antonio Stradivarius, who had, in fact, taught Gagliano how to construct violins. It seemed to sing in my hands every time I played it. I still practiced at the very least two and a half hours every day. While Andy and Steven wrote their songs downstairs, I practiced my violin upstairs. I dreamed of someday auditioning for the London Symphony Orchestra and making first chair. I even began my lessons again, studying with the first chair violinist from the London Philharmonic.
"Oh, well." I said. "I don't have my violin. I doubt she lets others play her instrument."
"Sure she would!" April replied. "Besides, she has three really nice ones. I'll ask her when she gets home."
As we were talking, Andy continued reading the score. He looked up and noticed a very small upright console piano against the far wall. He got up, walked over and set the sheet music on the piano. Sitting on the bench, he put his hands to the keys and paused. Then, reading the score carefully he began to play. Since the sheet music was for the first violins, Andy had to improvise the left hand. April and I were interrupted in mid sentence as the intro to Copelands 'Hoedown' rang from the piano. He did a good job with it, but only played about the first forty measures. He suddenly stopped and looked up.
"TJ, I thought you said lunch was ready?!" Andrew said sounding annoyed.
"Oh, yeah. It is!" I replied. "C'mon. Let's go eat."
"Aren't you going to continue playing?" April asked.
"Nah!" Andy scoffed. "That's written for the violin. Doesn't work so good on the piano."
"I thought you sounded great!" She remarked.
"Thanks, but I didn't play it too well. Besides, it's a bitch to play on the keyboard." Andrew added. "What's for lunch?" He smiled at our host, er ah... hostess.
We chattered on throughout the meal. April really seemed to be taken with the two of us, saying how she thought we were very funny. In truth, I think it had a lot to do with how open we are about our relationship.
"So, TJ." April said hesitantly. "Just what did you mean about your butt being scratched up and raw?"
"Oh, we spent last night in a barn. It had a hayloft and we got to fooling around. I found out that dry straw is like sandpaper. I got all scratched and cut up by it.": I answered, feeling rather embarrassed.
"Oh, good!" She remarked.
"GOOD?!" Andy and I cried.
"Yeah." April giggled. "When you said he'd scraped you raw, I worried you two might be into S&M or spankings or something."
"No, were just into T&A." Andy replied casually.
April gave Andy a disbelieving look as her mouth dropped open.
"Terry and Andy." He said and smiled. "That's T&A."
"You had me going there for a moment." She declared. "I almost thought you meant...."
"Don't!" He cried, putting one hand up to signal 'stop'.. "I don't want to talk about those!" He stated while shaking his head.
April laughed and said "Having tits isn't so bad! In fact, I rather like having them. Now the part that..... "
Andy cut into her sentence and shouted. "Don't! I know what you're going to say, but I don't want to think about it!"
"What's wrong, Andy? You like the female body, don't you?" April teased. Andrew made an odd twisted up face and wrinkled his nose.
"He got sick to his stomach the one time he did it with a girl." I informed her. Andy was actually looking a little greenish at the moment, I noticed.
"Really?!" She exclaimed. "Why'd you get sick?"
"Oh, please!" He moaned. "Can we change the subject?"
"OK." She said, still smiling. She paused for a moment, studied his face, then stated with a giggle "At least I'm one woman who doesn't suffer from penis envy!"
I fell out of my chair and right onto the floor! Holding my sides, I screamed with laughter while rolling this way and that. I glanced up as Andrew blinked his eyes at her.
"I would imagine that's true." He said, beginning to laugh. "In fact, other girls might even envy you for having that." He said, pointing at the crotch in her jeans.
"Oh, They do!" She giggled. "You'd be amazed how many women want to get in bed with me because I have a penis!"
"Hmmmm." Andy remarked. "I think women have tried to get me in bed for the very same reason. At least it seemed that way at the time."
"What about you, TJ?" April said as I lay laughing on the floor. "Have you ever slept with a woman?"
Regaining a small bit of my composure, I quickly answered.
"Oh, no ma'am!" I said being very serious. "Andy's ex-girlfriend tried to get me to once, but I was scared and jumped out of the bed."
April howled. She thought this was the funniest thing a guy had ever told her. I wasn't trying to be funny at the time, but it struck the right note with both her and Andrew. He was laughing, slapping the table with his hand while April was kicking her feet on the floor and holding her sides.
"Hey! You having a party or something, April?" A voice called from her still open front door. A rather frumpy looking character with waist length black hair and tiny round gold framed glasses was standing in the doorway, wearing tie dyed everything. T-shirt, pants and jacket. Even his deck shoes had the appearance of being tie dyed.
"Oh, hi Bob! Come meet my two new friends, Andy and TJ!" April said and motioned him in.
Bob the Hippy entered and walked slowly to the table. He eyed Andy and myself carefully, seeming quite cautious, perhaps even a bit paranoid.
"Are you the guys who walked into my apartment?" He asked.
"Yes and I want to apologize for that." I began.
"Oh, it's cool. I heard what you said about my pad. You liked how it looked, so you must be cool people." Bob stated as he sat down. "Wanna smoke a joint?"
Andy outstretched both arms and held up his hands, fingers pointing upward. Shaking them back and forth, he began to explain.
"Oh, no, no, no!" He said. "I'm one of those rare individuals who has an allergic reaction to pot."
"Really?" Bob quizzed. "What happens to you?"
"If I take just one hit, I lay on the floor for three days, unable to speak, think or move. My skin feels like it's on fire and my eyes are as red as a stop sign." Andrew explained to Bob.
"Wow...." He wondered aloud. "I wish I could get that stoned off one hit." Bob said wistfully.
Andy looked at me. I could tell he was confused by Bob's remark. Bob seemed to be just plain confused.
"OK, so what was everyone laughing about?" He asked.
"Oh, TJ and Andy are just naturally funny!" April claimed. "I haven't met anyone who's made me laugh like this in a long time."
"Hello!" A female voice called from behind me. Turning once again toward the open doorway, I watched as Aprils room mates entered the flat. The first one was about twenty five, brownish blonde shoulder length hair and hazel eyes. A very plain looking woman.
The second was very unusual looking. About 5' 6" tall, with strawberry blonde hair, green eyes and a slight freckling to her skin. She was quite thin and seemed to gaze off into the thin air. Both seemed to be hippie like, wearing madras print skirts and 'wifebeater' T-shirts.
'Violinist', I thought to myself as my eyes set upon the strawberry haired girl.
"Who do we have here?" The one leading the way asked.
"This is TJ and this is his boyfriend, Andrew." April said.
"Why do all the cute ones have to be gay?" The second girl asked aloud to no one.
"Because they're the boyfriend, of course!" Andrew replied in very underhanded way. I gave him a very pointed look.
"Oh, and he's funny, too!" Lisa with the strawberry hair remarked.
"Only until you get to know him." I stated, sounding unaffected.
Andy gazed down his nose at me and huffed a reply.
"Hmmmpgh!" he snorted.
"Do the two of you have names?" Lisa asked, apparently having missed April's' introduction. I spoke up before April could.
"Oh, Yes! Let me!" I said as I stood up. With a slight bow, I began.
"I am Terrence Allessandro Julian and THIS..... " I said, sweeping my arm 'round to point at Andrew "...Is His Excellency, Baron Andrew Simon van Ryan of Portugal." Andy would need no further encouragement from me!
April and her roommates gazed at Andrew who was now ignoring everyone and studying his fingernails. They glanced silently between each other as If communicating telepathically. Each seemed ready to speak up when Bob the Hippy beat them to it.
"Hey, That's pretty far out. Do you get paid anything for being a Baron?" He asked.
"No." Andrew sighed deeply. "I'm just one of the low lives of European Royalty."
Everyone began laughing at this remark and the serious tone in which he'd said it.
"Well, it's true!" He protested. "I can't even get the Queen to invite me over to the house!" Andy said using his very best 'Prince' voice, which only caused them to laugh louder.
"You're just kidding, right?" Shelly, the brown haired girl asked. "I mean about being a Baron."
"Actually, no." I stated while Andrew shook his head. "He really is a Baron."
The three girls stared at me for a moment then turned to stare at Andrew. He responded with his best manners.
"Very pleased to meet you." Andrew said as he stood up. "And you are?" he inquired.
"Shelly Mead." The first girl said limply as Andrew took her hand in his.
"Shelly!" He repeated and released her hand. Then turning to Lisa he smiled.
"And your name?" He asked, taking hold of her hand at the fingertips.
"Lisa Canfield" She said, sounding distant.
"Lisa! Well, now!" Andrew remarked as he slightly bowed, tipped his head and released her hand. Andy then turned to Bob.
"You must be this 'Bob the Hippy' I've heard so much about. A pleasure to meet you, sir!" Andy said, shaking Bobs hand firmly.
"Hey, No problem man! Cool meeting you, too!" Bob smiled as he shook his hand.
"Andy and TJ are musicians." April announced to them. "Andy plays piano and TJ said he plays the violin. Why don't you show him yours, Lisa."
Andrew arched one eyebrow up. In a tone of voice that seemed very suggestive, Andrew spoke up.
"Yes..." He agreed, nodding his head. "Show him yours, Lisa!"
I had to bite the inside of my lip to keep from laughing. Lisa blushed and giggled nervously as she grinned at me.
"OK. I'll go get them." She said and asked April to help her. As they went to fetch the instruments, Shelly, Bob, Andy and myself chatted on a bit. Bob asked Andrew more questions about being a Baron, while Shelly asked me how we'd met April. I explained that we were hitch hiking, April picked us up and brought us here to San Francisco.
"So, you just met her today?" Shelly asked.
"Yes, this morning about 10:00." I stated.
"So, did she talk about anything unusual?" Shelly quizzed. I knew immediately what she was 'fishing' for.
"Oh, we talked about a lot of unusual things." I replied, drawing her out a little longer.
"ah, I mean, did she tell you anything unusual about herself?" She asked.
"Hmmmmmm. Let me see......" I said thoughtfully. Then I turned towards Andrew and asked. "Hey, Andy. Did April say anything unusual about herself today?"
"Nothing, aside from talking about her penis." He calmly replied before returning to his conversation with Bob.
"No, I guess not." I said to Shelly, who by this time had gone into a wild fit of hysterics. She was laughing with tears coming down her cheeks when April and Lisa returned. Lisa carried two violin cases and April carried a third.
"I see they've got you laughing, too!" April remarked as she smiled. All Shelly could do was nod her head and hold her sides.
I stepped over to the living room sofa where Lisa had set the cases down. She opened them and told me a little about each violin. I was a bit surprised because all three were mass produced instruments. I'd expected her to have at least one that was handmade by a craftsman.
"This is my favorite." She said picking up the middle one. "Although that one was far more expensive and plays like butter, It just doesn't seem to have the tone and sustain my favorite has." She explained while pointing to the last case.
I looked carefully this violin before asking if I could hold it. She told me to go right ahead. I lifted it from the case and took out it's bow. I held it up and pulled the bow across the strings my fingers held down.
"No wonder it doesn't sing!" I remarked. "The action is way too low." I asked if she had a replacement bridge. She did and it was in the case. I found the bridge piece and quickly exchanged the two I re-tuned, all the time being careful not to actually play the instrument.
"April, Where's the sheet music Andy was looking at?" I questioned.
"On the piano, TJ." She replied. "Why? Are you going to try playing that piece?" She inquired, sounding doubtful.
"Yeah, I guess." I replied. "Gotta have something to play." Walking to were the music lay open, I looked at it and positioned the violin, looked at the score again and almost started to play, but didn't. I paused, leaning forward and studied the music carefully.
I suddenly pulled the bow across the strings and the instrument jumped to life. Having changing the bridge, the action had been raised and the violin now came to life. It responded beautifully and the notes were distinct and pure as I flew into the opening of Hoedown. Oh, I forgot to mention I'd performed the work while a member of New York City's Youth Philharmonic just two years earlier. I'd practiced it so much that I could play it from memory, never needing to read the sheet music. I slowly turned away from the score to face the room. As I did, Lisa began playing also. The two of us together sounded quite good, I thought. We played right through to the end and after we'd finished, the others all clapped and cheered for us.
"Hey, you're pretty damn good for a sissy!" April teased and patted me on the shoulder.
"You're very good, TJ." Lisa said to me.
"You're better." I replied. "I have to keep working at it."
"I don't know TJ, you might be a better player than you think you are. We always are our own worst critic." She replied. "Not to mention how you played it from memory!"
This made me feel really good. Maybe I could join an Orchestra someday!
"I think you sounded excellent, especially when playing together!" Andrew interjected. "Perhaps the two of you can do a bit more playing while we're here."
"I'd love to!" Lisa beamed. "In fact, the three of us can play." She motioned to Shelly, who quickly responded by nodding her head.
"Oh, that would be great!" I said excitedly.
"If you want Andy, you can play around with me." April remarked and gave him a sly smile.
"April!...Please!....." Andy shot back. "I'm a married man!"
........Continued Soon!