Breaking Ethan 3 : A change of heart by Bus Pender
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This is a work of gay fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely unintentional. This text deals with sexual relations between two men. If you find this offensive, if you are underage or if possession of this text is illegal in your area, please leave now. This story is not intended to promote any action on the part of the reader. It is merely a fantasy and I hope you appreciate it as such.
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I got the call five days later.
"Hey Mark, it's Ethan." On the surface, his voice sounded lighthearted, upbeat, but I sensed an edge of, what, desperation?
"Hey Ethe, what's up?" I asked
"Nothin', been a while since we've seen each other, thought we could hang for a bit today."
"Sure, I'm at the library, wanna meet for coffee?"
A pause.
"Um, I thought maybe you could drop by here and .."
"And .. ?"
"And, you know, maybe talk about stuff."
"Sure Ethe, I'll be over in an hour."
I arrived at Ethan's place and rang the bell. Mrs Dremel answered the door. "Eeetan, your friend is here," she sang.
Ethan opened his door and we went inside. He looked seriously disheveled. Faded long-sleeved shirt, with shirt tails half trailing out of baggy black jeans. Grey socks pulled out loosely at the toes. Hair arranged wildly, jutting out at improbable angles. We sat at the kitchen table and he regarded me with wide manic eyes.
"So Ethe, whaddya been up to?" I asked.
"Not a lot, school stuff mainly. I haven't been sleeping so good these days."
"Oh, why's that," I asked innocently.
"Why do you think?," he said dryly.
"Oh."
"Look, Mark, I've been thinking about what you said. I .. I can't go on like this. I need to get out of this thing, even for a little bit. I can't stand it anymore."
"Okay."
"So I'm .. I'm willing to go along with what you suggested." A pause, a sigh. "I don't like it, but I don't have much of a choice .. I can't, I gotta get this thing off. I mean, it feels weird `cause I've never done anything like this, and I don't know about doin' sexual stuff with you, but if I don't do somethin' I'm gonna go nuts. I can't sleep, I can't concentrate. I've failed one exam already and I've got a couple of mid-terms next week that I'm no way ready for." He was talking really fast and gesticulating wildly as he spoke. "I'm afraid of losing my semester, it's that bad."
"Ethan, you can cut the drama routine, I hear you. And you don't need to worry .. I'll start you off slow, ease you in so to speak. So here's the deal .. the month starts right now. First of all, you need to start calling me `sir'. Do you understand, Ethan?"
"Yes sir."
"Good. Next, you need to know that I choose when we meet and when you get unlocked. Is that clear?"
"Yes sir."
"Wonderful. And another thing .. if you question my orders, if you balk or refuse to do anything I tell you to do, I'll add extra time to your confinement. Capeesh?"
"Yes sir."
"Oh, and we'll need to give you a safe word," I said.
"Safe word, sir?" he said.
"Yeah, you know, a word you can say to let me know if things get a bit too much for you," I said.
"Sir, I .. I don't like the sound of this."
"Relax Ethe, it's just a precaution. It's like an escape hatch if you decide you don't want to continue on the path we're about to embark on."
"Um, okay. Sir."
"So for a safe word, hmmm, something easy to remember, but distinctive enough so there's no misunderstanding .. hmmm. I've got it .. mamihlapinatapai !! There's no mistaking that!"
"Mami .. lapi ..?
"Mami-hlapi-natapai .. it's Yaghan for when two people look at each other, hoping that the other one's going to initiate something they both want, but neither wants to be the one to set things in motion. Mamihlapinatapai. Good word, huh."
"Sir, that's impossible to .. "
"Ethan, fuck, relax, I'm just joking .. what the fuck is wrong with you? Okay, so for your safe word .. hmmm .. oh, I know .. how about `Mrs Dremel'."
"But sir, that's my landlady's name, I can't .." he said.
"Mrs Dremel', Ethe, that's your safe word, and I don't give a fuck whether you like it or not. Mrs Dremel' it is, got it?"
A sigh. "Yes sir."
"Then say it."
"Mrs Dremel. Sir," he said unenthusiastically.
"Very good. So, now that you have your safe word, you can use it if you need it. As I said, if we're doing anything that you are uncomfortable with or you don't like, you use the safe word and we stop immediately. But be careful, because that means we go back to square one, so only use it if you're sure you don't want to continue. Got it?"
"Yes sir."
"Stellar, Ethan. So I guess that wraps things up for now, I'm going to go and I'll let you know when we'll get together again."
He looked dismayed.
"But .. could we .. could you .. please .. um, unlock me for a bit right now, I really need .. "
"`Fraid not Ethe, not today."
"But I thought .."
"Well you thought wrong Ethan. And by the way, I'm adding an extra day to your confinement for arguing, and another day for not calling me sir. Got it?"
A pause.
"I said `got it?'
"Yes sir."
"Goodbye Ethan, I'll be in touch," I said.
"Goodbye sir. Um, sir, can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, shoot."
"Sir, why are you doing this?"
I looked up at him, met his gaze. "You mean you don't know?"
He looked straight back at me and blinked. He shook his head.
"It's the only way I could think of to save `us', Ethan."
He looked at me all puzzled .. too cute.
"Ethe, you're a good friend, I like you a lot. And in case you hadn't noticed, I'm fucking hot for you .. always have been. From the minute I saw you, all I could think about was getting into your pants. That's actually why I became friends with you in the first place. So I could get to know you, get closer and then make my move. But things didn't turn out as I expected. For one, I didn't realize how close a friendship you and I would have. And, I had no idea the depth of your denial."
He looked puzzled again.
"Ethan, I know my feelings aren't one-sided. I've seen the way you look at me when you think I'm not looking."
"I don't know what you're talking about. Sir," he said.
"Of course you'd say that, and that's precisely why I've had to go to these lengths to get you where I want you. I thought of telling you how I feel, or pouncing on you or trying to seduce you, but I know what would've happened. You would have rebuffed me and our friendship would have been ruined. I didn't want that to happen, and then I realized that I had to do something. I couldn't stay friends with you without letting you know how I feel .. that would have killed me and at some point I'd have had to walk away from the friendship .. it's been that hard for me to be with you as just a friend. And I couldn't risk telling you and having you flatly turn me down. So I realized I had to take control of the situation. I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. So I came up with this plan."
Ethan looked stunned, confused. He was evidently struggling with what I was telling him.
"Ethe, I sent you that cage as an invitation." I paused again so that what I was telling him could sink in.
"The conversation we had that night, when I was goading you into trying on the cage, and making fun of how small I thought you were, well, that was my way of forming the link in your mind between you and me, and the cage. When you locked yourself in, while I was holding the key in my hot little hands, you were accepting my invitation."
"I .. I didn't realize any of this," he said absentmindedly.
"I know, of course you didn't. And I kind of needed you to NOT be consciously aware of what you were doing, that's why I got you drunk. Because when you're drunk, Ethan, you're not exactly the brightest bulb. In fact, you're .. hmmm, how can I put this? .. dumb as fuck?" I grinned.
His mouth had formed a straight line, he was peeved. Disregarding his manner, I continued. "So, since that fateful evening, Ethe, you and I have been in a bit of a power struggle. But that seems to have resolved itself now, wouldn't you say? So, here we are."
Ethan was scrunching up his face into a grimace, looking at me as if I'd lost my mind.
"Ya know Ethe, you can play dumb all you like, but I know on some level you've been aware of how I feel. I think you actually get off on it .. having someone who's attracted to you but can never have you. And I know that a part of you is really curious to see what it'd be like if you and I were to .. you know .. but you'd never allow that to happen. Not under normal circumstances, anyway. You keep your nose buried in your books and remain oblivious to everything else. You never date, you don't express interest in guys or girls, I don't know WHAT the fuck you are, I'm not even sure that YOU know."
I skooched my chair alongside Ethan's, brought my arm over his shoulders and whispered in his ear, "But I guess we're about to find out."
I reached my other arm across his front and leaned in, burying my face into the side of his neck. I nuzzled him playfully. It must have tickled because he recoiled, giggling, trying to squirm away. I tightened my embrace as my lips made contact with his supple flesh. I started to suck his skin gently, intently, then with greater intensity, drawing it into my driven mouth. He stopped giggling and cried out; his squirming morphed into serious efforts to pull away, push me off, but my arms held him in place as I fed on the tender patch of skin. I brought my teeth into play to deepen the encounter.
"Ow," he cried, "cut it out, that hurts .. sir!"
I ignored his pleas and continued on with the ritual. After about a minute of struggling, his body slackened as he gave in to the unexpected assault. I felt like a lion, instinctually gripping the neck of a downed gazelle, drawing the life from the defeated creature.
When it seemed that I'd sufficiently marked my territory, I pulled away slowly, a string of drool forming a bridge from my mouth to his neck like a translucent umbilical cord. The strand broke away and I watched with satisfaction as a purplish welt began to form on the side of Ethan's neck. The mark suited him .. the uncertain shape, the indifferent toothmarks, the dappled mauves and magentas that gleamed with saliva against his milky skin. Fascinating how a few ruptured capillaries could produce such an effect.
He looked up at me with concerned puppy eyes that transformed his face into an avatar of compliance. I smirked as he brought a hand up to soothe the blemish.
"Sir, why did you do that?" he asked. He was incensed.
"`Cause I felt like it, Ethan. Think of it as a ceremonial rite to seal the deal," I said.
"Sir, it hurt .. "
"Just a little rough-housing, Ethe, nothing serious. Besides, you enjoyed being subjugated."
"No, sir, I didn't, in fact I .. "
"I don't believe you Ethan. In fact, I'm willing to bet that if you dropped your pants right now, we'd see that you had a big ole wood trying to break free of the cage. Let's make it interesting .. drop your pants .. if you're not all boned up like I'm pretty sure you are, I release you for good, no more cage. C'mon, Ethe, you wanna get rid of the cage, don't you? Let's see what's goin' on down there."
Ethan didn't move. He wouldn't even look at me. He was looking down, still fingering his hickey.
"I knew it. You fucking loved it and you're as excited as I am about what's to come."
I reached down to his crotch and grabbed the cage through the fabric of his jeans. It felt weighty and solid. Ethan looked up at me as I gave it a tug and held it there, pulling on it with even force. I stared into his unresponsive eyes.
"You're mine now, Ethan. You belong to me, and you and I are going to have such fun together," I said, releasing the cage and tousling his hair good-naturedly as a father might do to his young son.
Cupping his head in the palm of my hand, I leaned in once again and tenderly kissed the bruised skin on his neck before getting up and heading for the door. I turned and looked back at Ethan.
"Don't try to hide that hickey, Ethan. I want you to wear it proudly like a good little boy. If you try to hide it, there WILL be consequences," I said.
"Yes sir," he said.
I grinned and stepped out the door.