Changing Ways Chapters

Dear Readers:

Thank you for taking the time to read this story. It is a tale of two young students trying to find themselves in life. The chapters switch POV?s quite a bit, but I?m sure you all will have no problem reading them. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Though there is no sex in this story, yet, I should warn you that it does have two under-aged boys who fall in love. If you cannot read this for whatever reason, please leave now.

The story is still growing, and I have more than these few chapters. I will work on getting them uploaded as time goes on.

Thanks for reading.

D. (email all suggestions and comments to dnorris190@gmail.com)

Chapter 1 Welcome Ben

Dear Diary,

There I sat, in the front seat of my dad?s ?97 ford pickup truck. I sat there waiting for my dad to walk out of the house. Today was the first day of school and I was eager to get out of the house. Ever since I moved to Arizona, life has been quiet. I moved there about a month ago into a really quiet neighborhood. We recently moved from California in search of work. The construction business hasn?t been doing too well over in California since the recession started. I was glad to be out of that state. Why would I want to live somewhere that I can?t get married? Sure I?m only 14, but it is important to think of the future. I was eager to get to class on my first day of school. Sure I probably wouldn?t make any friends, but at least learning was fun. I am the shy, quiet nerd that sits in the back of the class. I don?t like getting into fights and I like to stick to myself. Ever since my mother died when I was a child, I haven?t reached out to make friends. I am still too sad.

I?ll write tomorrow, Love Ben.

I wrote in my log I kept with me at all times. I heard my dad open the truck door and I quickly shoved my log away in my backpack. I was ashamed that I had a diary and I didn?t want my father to hate me for it.

?So bucko, are you ready for school?? my father asked with a joyous smile.

?I guess so. Not much to look forward to I guess,? I stated quietly, looking at the floor of the old truck. My father turned the key into the ignition and the truck slowly sputtered to life while releasing a bloom of black smoke. The short ride over to the school was a quiet one. Neither of us said anything.

As we were nearing the school, my dad pulled over to the side of the road. ?Listen hear son. If anything bad happens today I want you to give me a call. I?ll come pick you up as soon as I can,? stated his father reassuring me.

?Thanks Dad. I will,? I replied, slipping out of the truck door, ?Have a good day dad.?

?You too son. You too,? my dad replied while signaling me off.

The truck roared back to life behind me and it drove away. There I was, in front of my new high school, alone and lost.

?Attention all students. Please find the green signs posted around campus to find out where you need to go to get your schedule. Thank you,? the intercom system announced.

?Right on time,? I thought as I walked around the campus looking for a sign to find out where I should go. It seemed like hours until I finally found a sign. The sign was pretty basic. It had a lot of sheets of paper on it with everyone?s? name on it. Amongst the crowd, I managed to find my name and I learned where to go.

?It says here to go to room 916. Alright now where is room 916?? I thought as I pulled out my map. ?It looks like I am going off to building C.? I put my map away and I started walking towards the middle building on my school?s campus. As I was stepping through the doors of building C, the bell starting ringing profusely. ?Shit. I have to get going,? I thought as I began rushing through the halls to find room 916.

I managed to maneuver into room 916 only three minutes late, phew. It didn?t seem like too much had happened. The teacher was standing around, passing out schedules.

?Benjamin? Is there a Benjamin in this class?? the teacher asked as she scanned the room.

?That?s me ma?am,? I cautiously stated as I approached her.

?Ah glad to know you made it. Try to be on time next time though okay??

?I?ll do my best ma?am,? I replied.

?Very good. Anyway, here is your schedule. Review it. Throw it away. I don?t care. That schedule is in your hands now,? she replied as she turned to sit down.

I began scanning through the list. It looked like I had honors biology first. Within a matter of minutes, the bell signaled to show us the way to our next class. I began searching for room 910 as soon as I got out of the class room.?It can?t be too far away,? I thought to myself. I began scanning the numbers on the door. ?916. 914. 912. 908.? I counted in my head. ?Where is room 910? It should be right here.? It was then that I noticed that room 910 was in front of me the whole time. Its number sign had just been missing. Luckily I was one of the first people in class so I sat back and waited for everyone to show up.

One by one people started filing in. None of them looked very attractive to me so I was a little bit disappointed. The bell rung and a boy, probably around 15 ran into the classroom and sat in the chair right across from me. The first sight of him took my breath away. He was wearing a white t-shirt with a black over shirt and a pair of black shorts. He had his hair styled loose and choppy, but overall he was gorgeous. ?He is probably straight. I shouldn?t get my hopes up too high to be with him,? I thought to myself, ?It?s always how it is. All the good looking guys always have to be straight.? Soon reality set in and my teacher introduced herself.

?Hello class. Welcome to honors biology. I am Mrs. Jefferson and I will be your science teacher for the rest of this year. I am a tough, but fair teacher. I say my rules and I expect them to be followed. However we won?t go over the rules for a few more days. I think we need to do an exercise to get to know everyone. So stand up everyone. Get ready to do the activity. We will be sitting in order of our last times. A starts over there, and it looks like W will end here. However, you cannot talk to each other. You must do it silently,? Mrs. Jefferson stated enthusiastically. The class slowly stumbled to life. The beginning was chaos, but my teacher said that two people would be sitting in the back table. There were two pods of tables and one small table in the back. My last name was Wilkins so I knew that I was going to be sitting in the back table. I kept my schedule on the table to kids could compare their last names to mine. Soon only a few kids were wandering around the class room. The hottie was one of them. The few remaining kids found their spot and the only one left was the hottie. He promptly took his seat down next to me. We exchanged the casual hellos and soon the teacher started talking, interrupting us.

?Once again. Let me welcome you to this class. Where you are sitting will be your assigned seat for a while until I can learn all of your names,? she began. I ended up not paying attention because I figured that all the class would just tell me the same things. Same rules, same everything. As soon as it started, the bell began ringing. The class filtered out and I left for my next class.

The day went by very slowly. The classes were like a tape on replay. Each class it was the same thing. Meet new kids, learn more rules. Luckily the day was almost over. ?I still haven?t made any friends, but at least I saw one hot guy today,? I thought to myself as I strolled down the hallway to my last class of the day. English.

Everyone has their own first impression of their teachers and my English teacher seemed crazy. I walked up to the class room door and there she stood with a great smile on her face.

?Please find your name on the list and sit at the desk you are assigned to please. Thank you,? she echoed multiple times at the children of the class. I quickly found my name at the end of the list. ?Desk two is my seat I guess,? I thought to myself. ?Now. Who is seat number one?? I scanned the list and saw one student listed below me. A student by the name of Briar. ?What a strange name. He?s probably going to be some naturist dweeb.? I thought to myself. I walked into the class room and sat down, next to the hottie who was in my biology class.

Like every other class I was in today, our teacher made us meet everyone and read the rules off you us. ?I want to go home already. This day has gone on long enough. I want to be home so I can clear my head,? I thought. Almost as soon as I thought that, the bell started to ring. ?It?s like it could read my mind,? I joked to myself.

I emerged from the class room and got lost in a flood of people. Everyone was walking the same way and I was just another person. I went out to the back of the school to see if my dad would be out there waiting for me. He wasn?t. ?It looks like I will have to ride the bus,? I thought to myself. ?Only one problem, I don?t know where the buses where.? I started looking around to see if I could see anything that looked like buses. I saw the bus loop, 300 feet away and the buses were getting ready to roll. I went dashing down the sidewalk as if I was being chased by a serial killer.

Chapter 2: Welcome Briar

I woke up in my normal Briar attitude. I hated mornings, especially the ones where I had to wake up to go to school. Oh well, my audience awaited me, and I had no time to waste. I quickly jumped out of my bed and dashed out of my room, and started the shower. I waited while the water warmed, and observed myself through to mirror. ?It?s no wonder why girls love me. I am hot as can be. Tanned, muscular, tall, 15. Everything teenage chicks want,? I thought to myself. The shower finally got hot enough and I slipped inside. After getting myself washed, I walked back into my bedroom and adorned myself in the finest and trendiest of my new school clothes. First impression is everything.

?Briar, come down stairs, breakfast is ready!? I heard my mom holler for me from downstairs. I couldn?t help but think of how annoying she was. I didn?t hate her, she kept me alive, and I knew that I loved her, but ever since my dad walked out on us when I was 13, she was different. She would work later hours at the law firm downtown, and I would only see her now in the mornings before school started.

I walked myself down the stairs, and sat down in the breakfast bar, and quickly consumed my breakfast, so I could finish getting ready for school.

?Don?t eat so fast, you?ll kill yourself that way by choking or something,? my mom stated nonchalantly.

?Don?t worry about it mom. I?m running late,? I stated as I got up from the table, and ran upstairs to finish getting ready. I brushed my teeth, grabbed my bag, and was out the door to head to the bus stop. I road in silence all the way to the school.

Once I got to the school, I was told to look on a list to find out where I should go to get my schedule. I didn?t have much time before the bell rang, so I hurried up to room 916. The teacher there just gave us our schedules, and let us do whatever we wanted. The bell rang and it was time to go to my first class, Honors Biology, room 910.

I walked in the halls and saw that there were no rooms labeled 910, so I walked into a classroom and asked, and behold, I was there. I pulled a chair out from a desk, and plopped down, ready for the rule week to begin. I looked across the table and saw a cute, blonde boy with blue eyes, staring at me. I didn?t think anything of it. ?So what? He?s gay and he obviously likes me. Big deal,? I thought to myself. The teacher finally spoke and grabbed the boy?s attention, off of me.

?Hello class. Welcome to honors biology. I am Mrs. Jefferson and I will be your science teacher for the rest of this year. I am a tough, but fair teacher. I say my rules and I expect them to be followed. However we won?t go over the rules for a few more days. I think we need to do an exercise to get to know everyone. So stand up everyone. Get ready to do the activity. We will be sitting in order of our last times. A starts over there, and it looks like W will end here. However, you cannot talk to eachother. You must do it silently,? she spoke. She seemed as happy to be here as we were. Kids started to stand up and look around clueless. Mrs. Jefferson told us that two people would be sitting at the table in the back corner. Since my last name was Williams, I assumed that I would be over there. I was one of the last people standing, and quickly took the seat next to the blonde boy from earlier.

The rest of the day went by slowly, but I couldn?t get the blonde boy out of my head. ?Pull yourself together Briar. You aren?t gay. Get that kid out of your head. It?s nothing,? I thought to myself. Eventually lunch came and I saw the blonde boy walk past me. He saw me and quickly lowered his head. I kept on walking to my usually hang out spot during lunch. My friends and I would occupy 4, 8 people tables and just socialize the whole time. We talked about how our summers were, even though we all hung out during the summer multiple times. We talked about who we liked, and if Jason was still dating Mary. You know, teenage things.

Eventually the bell rang, and I ran off to my trig class. That class was boring, like all math classes were. They were always too easy for me. I was always friendless in them because all of my friends were taking normal math classes that Sophomores would take, and I was taking math that seniors would learn. That class passed by quickly, and it was finally time for my last class of the day, English.

I wandered to my final classroom, and was greeted by the sounds of music and a pepped up teacher. I had heard that Mrs. Wenz was a great teacher, but she put too much emotion into everything. I could tell that this couldn?t end will. She told students to look at the list on the door to find out where to sit. Since my name was last on the list, I had to sit in desk one. It was in the front, left hand corner of the desks which were arranged in a U. Students slowly began to funnel in, and I noticed that the boy from my biology class sat next me, in desk two. Mrs. Wenz talked way too much for me to pay any care to the blonde boy, so before we knew it, the final bell rang, signaling the end of our first day back.

Chapter 3: Ben Bussed

I made it there right in the nick of time. My bus was just about to move. I was out of breath when I finally walked on board. I gave a coarse hello to the bus driver and I scanned the area for a seat. There was one open, all the way in the back, right next to Briar. I started walking down the center aisle. Every kid was watching me walk. It felt strange having all eyes on me. As I got to the back of the bus, I saw Briar putting his backpack on the ground to make room for me. I got closer and the bus started to move. I wasn?t ready and I fell right on top of Briar.

?Oh no. I have to think of something quick.? Like a fox, I darted off of him. ?I?m sorry, I?m so sorry. I didn?t mean to. I mean it just sort of happened? I murmured.

?Chill dude. It?s fine. It?s not your fault. It?s the bus driver?s fault. He moved before you were ready,? Briar told me. I still wasn?t sure if everything was alright, but we let it be.

I was nervous. I didn?t know if I should say any more. It took some time until I finally said, ?You?re in my biology class right??

?Um, yeah. I think so. English too,? he replied sounding nervous. He had the sweetest voice and I was in a trance by it.

I decided that it would probably be a good idea to know his name for sure so I stated, ?Well cool. I?m Ben.? I was still shaking in my boots. It was hard talking to a guy I liked.

?I?m Briar. Nice to meet you.?

Neither of us spoke another road word for the bus ride. Kids quickly started getting off the bus, but Briar stayed on. It seemed like he would never get off. Soon we were the last two kids on the bus. I hadn?t bothered to move over a seat because I didn?t think about it really. We soon arrived at the bus stop in front of my neighborhood.

?Alright boys. Here is your stop,? the bus driver screamed at us. I could tell he was ready for the day to be over with.

I give him a polite goodbye and I step out of the bus. I stand by the doors for a little bit to see which way Briar was going to go. ?I can?t believe my luck. This god of a boy lives in the same neighborhood as me. Maybe we can become friends,? I thought hopefully. Briar walked off the bus moments after I did and he started walking down the same street I lived one.

We must have walked at least a block until Briar finally said, ?So. Are you just going to follow me or are you going to say something.?

I didn?t know how to respond. I could tell him the truth, but I decided that I should be crafty and give him the classic, ?Something,? line.

We walking in silence for a few more minutes and he started walking up a driveway. ?Well, see you tomorrow dude,? he stated.

I didn?t want to stop talking to him so I replied, ?Hey, um, hold on.?

Chapter 4: Briar?s Confusion

I didn?t live far from the school, but I took the bus anyway. I was not about to walk home in the 110 degree summer heat in Arizona. The bus was pretty empty when I got there since I usually walk ahead of the crowd. I like being alone. The bus crowd starting roaming in on their own and soon the bus was full, except for one seat next to me. ?Yes. I get my own seat. I guess putting my backpack their helps. The crowd is dwindling and I still have an open seat next to me.? The buses honk their horn, signaling their leave. I see a boy running to the buses. ?Please don?t let him get on this bus. Please don?t let him get on this bus.? I close my eyes and I hear the bus door open. Shit. I look up and I see Ben. One seat left on the bus and it?s next to me. I move my bag to the floor to open up room as he gets near the seat and the bus starts moving even though Ben was still walking. Apparently the lurch forward caught Ben by surprise because the next thing I realize is that Ben was falling onto me. I blinked and he was on me. He quickly got up, wishing to avoid anything awkward.

?I?m sorry, I?m so sorry. I didn?t mean to. I mean it just sort of happened? Ben murmured.

?Chill dude. It?s fine. It?s not your fault. It?s the bus driver?s fault. He moved before you were ready,? I tried to reassure him, choosing my words carefully. My mind was racing. ?Did he actually just fall on me? Did we actually get that close?? I turned my shoulder and started looking out the window.

Some time passed until he finally uttered, ?You?re in my biology class right??

I thought he was talking to someone else, but then I looked over and he was looking right at me. ?Um yeah. I think so. English too.? I managed to craft.

?Well cool. I?m Ben,? he stated as he extended his hand, offering a hand shake.

?I?m Briar. Nice to meet you.? We didn?t say much for the rest of the bus ride. I was one of the last stops on the bus. Even though I lived less than a mile from the school, they insisted on taking a longer route to drop kids off. Little by little all of the kids get off until it is just Ben and me alone on the bus. Despite the variety of open seats, he didn?t move from my seat. I started thinking about everything that happened today until I was interrupted mid though by the bus driver.

?Alright boys. Here is your stop,? the bus driver hollered to the back of the bus.

?Us? Ben lives by me?? I thought to myself. Ben had already stood up to get his bag and started walking down the center aisle.

?Thank you,? Ben stated to the bus driver as he walked out.

?Thanks,? I mumbled as I walked out of the bus. My mind was too preoccupied to care how rude I was. I took the last few steps out of the bus and I see that Ben was waiting for me. I ignored him at first and started walking towards my house. Ben trailed me. We had to walk about 2 blocks to my house, but I didn?t care. I just walked and thought. Soon I turned my attention to Ben. I thought about what I should say to him and I finally stated, ?So. Are you just going to follow me or are you going to say something.?

Ben stayed quiet for a few minutes until he finally peeped out a simple, ?Something.?

I couldn?t help but laugh inside. We kept walking until we were in front of the driveway to my house. ?Well, see you tomorrow dude,? I stated casually.

?Hey, um, hold on,? Ben commanded.

Chapter 5: Misunderstanding

?Yeah? What do you want?? Briar inquired towards me.

?I think he?s mad at me. Maybe talking to him was a bad idea,? I thought to myself. I was on the verge of tears. ?Come on. Don?t cry now. Not while he?s in front of you.?

?Aw man. Dude. I didn?t mean to say it so harshly,? he tried to comfort me, but it was no use. I left upset and broke into tears as I ran to the house next door, and went inside while crying.

?I knew I shouldn?t have fallen in love with him. I hardly know him. All I know is that he is a jerk and good looking. He?s probably straight. I need to give up my hopes of ever being with him,? I thought to myself in my self-wallow. I was devastated that I couldn?t be with him. This wasn?t the first time my heart was broken so easily. It seems like I fall in love at first site too often with straight guys. It really blows. I darted to my 2nd story bedroom. My room was a bit of a mess, but what teenage boys? room isn?t. The walls were a neutral yellow color. I had a few pieces of furniture in there a bed, a wardrobe, the essentials. My favorite part of my room was the windows. I had one window that overlooked the street so I could see if anything was going on. Another window I had looked over into Briar?s bedroom.

I plopped down onto my bed and started crying in my pillow. The longer I cried, the worse it got. ?I love him but I know that I?ll never be with him. He probably hates me now,? I thought to myself. Suddenly I hear the familiar ding of my doorbell. ?Great. Who could that be?? I thought as I rushed down the stairs while I wiped my tears away. Soon I crossed over the great room to the front door. I put my moist hand on the doorknob, opened it and there he was. Briar was standing on my front door step. ?Oh. It?s you,? was all I could craft to say to him.

?Please don?t make this any harder than it has to be. Listen. I?m sorry for hurting your feelings today. My mind has just been busy today,? he pleaded, wanting my forgiveness. I was full of mixed emotions, but I knew that we couldn?t make a scene out here for everyone to see.

?Do you?do you want to come inside?? I stammered with a lump in my throat.

?Maybe later. I have some things I have to do,? he stated.

?Oh. Okay. Maybe some other time then,? I stated disappointedly as I turned to close the door. The tears were coming back. Why did I have to fall in love with him so quickly?

?Well maybe a few minutes won?t kill me,? he covered as he followed me into the house. I was happy, but I didn?t know the first thing of what to say or do. I rarely had friends over here. I took him through a tour of the house, offered him a drink, and we waltzed up to my bedroom.

As soon as he walked in, he saw my favorite window. ?Hey. Your window is in a funny spot. You could have spied on me if you wanted to,? he noted while looking at me.

My insides were red. This was so embarrassing. I had to think quickly. ?Yeah. I guess I could if I wanted to. But don?t worry. I won?t,? I stated embarrassed.

We talked about a few things. Stuff like sports and girls. You know the typical guy stuff. Soon I bluntly asked, ?What do you think about gay people?? I could tell this caught him off guard. He choked on his drink. I was devastated. Maybe there is no way he?s gay. ?Oh. I see. So you probably hate me then,? was all I could muster up.

?I think I?d better go,? he stammered, excusing himself as he ran down stairs.

By the time he was at the door, I was still upstairs looking down on him from the balcony. ?Briar. Wait. Please,? I pleaded from the balcony ledge upstairs. I got his attention for he was looking up at me. I stated, ?Please don?t tell anyone my secret please.? He left after that. He didn?t say anything to me. He slammed the door and left. I fell to the floor sluggishly and I began to cry. I curled up in a ball and I cried, ?Why? Why did I have to be such an idiot and tell him that I was gay? I hardly know him.? Soon I fell into a slumber and time passed quickly. Before I knew it, my dad was home from wherever he was.

?Ben, I?m home,? my dad bellowed from downstairs. I do not call back. ?Ben? Ben where are you?? my dad vocalized in a worried tone. I could hear his footsteps pounding up the ceiling. I knew he was going to ask me what was wrong and I would have to tell him that I was gay. He saw me laying on the ground and crying. He picked me up. My small frame was no match for him. He carried me over to the couch in the loft and sat down. ?Ben, what?s wrong?? I was silent. I didn?t move. I just sat there next to him. ?Come on Ben, you can tell me anything.? I broke out and started crying more. I turned away from him. I didn?t want to speak. ?Ben. Please tell me what happened. I can?t help you if you don?t tell me what?s wrong.?

We sat there in silence. I didn?t know what to tell him. I had too many things on my mind. I could tell him about Briar or I could tell him that I was gay. Either way, both stories would be told. ?There?s this boy,? I cried in between sobs.

?What did he do to you?? he inquired, demanding answers.

?Nothing dad. I caused it all,? I tried to answer but apparently it wasn?t good enough for him.

?Son. You can tell me anything,? he reassured me, placing his hand on my shoulder.

?I?I love him dad,? I stammered.

I was expecting him to stand up and leave, but he stayed sitting. We sat there for what seemed like an eon until at last he commented, ?You?re my son and I will always love you. I don?t care what sex the person is who you marry. I just want you to be happy.? He grabbed me and pulled me onto his lap and gave me a hug. I started crying more. Not tears of sadness, but of happiness. We sat there until at last he got up to go make dinner.

The rest of the night was uneventful. We ate our dinner in silence and he went off to bed shortly after. I was the only soul awake in the house. I was getting drowsy so I decided to walk upstairs and go to lie in my bed. I looked through my window blinds to see that Briar?s were closed. ?Figures that they would be closed. Today was awful,? I thought to myself. I decided to take out my log and write in it while the wounds were still fresh.

Dear Diary,

Today was awful. Nothing went right. I fell in love with a boy who hates me?.again. Why is that I have to mess everything up. By tomorrow he?ll have probably already told the whole school that I was gay. I don?t know if I even want to show up tomorrow. What?s the use? I can?t stay out of school for the rest of the year. Maybe if I go to sleep now I?ll have a clear head in the morning.

Ciao, Ben

I placed my log down on the nightstand next to my bed and slowly began to disrobe. I couldn?t wait to get out of my tear stained school clothes. I walked over to my dirty clothes hamper and grabbed a pair of pajama bottoms. I slipped them on and walked over to my wet bed. ?I probably cried a little bit too much today,? I accepted it and I slid underneath the covers. It didn?t take me long to drift off to slumber.

Chapter 6: Resolution . . .

This caught me off guard. I turned around to see what he wanted. I harshly stated, ?Yeah? What do you want?? I saw his face turn from a nervous smile to a frown. ?Aw shit. Why did I have to do that?? I thought to myself. Ben was at the point of crying. I could tell. ?Aw man. Dude. I didn?t mean to say it so harshly,? I stated as I placed my hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off and left. I could tell he was crying because he was wiping his eyes with his hoodie sleeve. I stood in my driveway, watching the ground, just thinking about what just happened. ?Why did I have to be so mean to him? I just screwed everything up between us. It?s probably for the better though. I can?t be falling in love with him. I?m not gay.? I looked up from the ground and I saw him unlock the door to the house right next to mine.

?I can?t believe he lives next door to me. I mean I know a family moved in there a few weeks ago, but I never knew it was him. Why did I have to go and ruin everything? I need to go over and apologize. Maybe I should give him some time. I don?t know what to do.? I thought to myself as I ventured into my house. I walked into my house alone quite often and it there was nothing new about it. I guess I?ve gotten used to this way of life. I could make dinner for myself and I could go swimming in the buff whenever I wanted. As much as I wanted to just strip down and go swimming, to escape the 110 degree heat, I figured I should go apologize to Ben first.

After I threw on some comfortable after school clothes, I walked outside into the warm desert heat over to his house. I didn?t know what I was going to say and figured it would come to me when I saw him. I cautiously walked up his driveway to his grand 2 story house. There were grey and black rocks that lined the bottom of the lower wall of his outside house. There was a nice sitting area outside in the front yard too. ?Wow. This house is nice.? I thought to myself as I reached for the door bell. Hesitantly I pushed the sun bleached button. I was greeted with the usual ding dong. I stood outside waiting for an answer. I didn?t hear anyone coming so I turned around and was about to walk away when suddenly the door opened.

?Oh. It?s you,? Ben stated sadly when he opened the door. I could tell that he had been busy because his face was all red. It could have been from crying or it might have been something else but it didn?t really matter.

?Please don?t make this any harder than it has to be. Listen. I?m sorry for hurting your feelings today. My mind has just been busy today,? I apologized. He didn?t know half of the things that were going through my mind right now and I hoped he wouldn?t ask.

?Do you?do you want to come inside?? he invited.

?Maybe later. I have some things I have to do,? I lied to avoid going inside.

?Oh. Okay. Maybe some other time then,? he stated lowly. I could hear the disappointment in his voice. The last thing I wanted was to make him upset with me again.

?Well maybe a few minutes won?t kill me,? I said happily. I was looking forward to the inside of his house. It would be fun.

He ended up giving me a tour of his house. It was almost identical to mine except it was a mirrored version and it was clean. He showed me to the living room and kitchen and he asked if I wanted anything to drink. I told him I was fine for now. We continued the tour and he took me up to his room. One of the first things that I noticed was that his window looked right into mine.

?Hey. Your window is in a funny spot. You could have spied on me if you wanted to,? I laughed hoping that he hasn?t spied on me. Certain things need to stay a secret.

He let out a chuckle, ?Yeah. I guess I could if I wanted to. But don?t worry. I won?t.?

We made some light talk like what our favorite subjects were, where we came from, and other small talk subjects. Soon he asked me, ?What do you think about gay people?? Caught off guard, I let out a small cough since I was mid sip of my drink. ?Oh. I see. So you probably hate me then,? he uttered

?What was he saying? Did he just come out to me on the first day that I?ve known him? What should I say? How should I react?? I thought to myself. ?I think I?d better go,? I said in a hurry as I was already walking out of his room and out the front door.

?Briar. Wait. Please,? Ben pleaded from the balcony ledge upstairs. I picked my head up and he stated, ?Please don?t tell anyone my secret please.?

I ignored him and left. I was too confused to say anything at that moment. I went home and I took a nap that lasted all night.

Chapter 7: Rise and Shine Ben

Morning emerged at last and I awoke with the familiar knock at my bedroom door. ?Ben, it?s time to get up. Get your butt in gear and go take a shower and get ready,? my dad hollered at me.

I glanced over at the clock on my cell phone. 5:30. ?Aw dad, the sun isn?t even awake yet,? I moaned and groaned. I sluggishly rolled out of my bed and did my morning stretch and yawn. I emerged from my room to hear the sound of bacon cooking downstairs in the kitchen. ?Well at least I have something to look forward to after waking up this early in the morning,? I thought to myself as I walked into my bathroom.

I slipped off my pajama bottoms and admired my body in the mirror. I was getting pretty well developed in my teenage boy life. I had little six pack that I was proud of. I was born with natural muscle so I didn?t really need to work out. I strolled over to the shower and started it up. I stood under the warm water for a good 20 minutes before I finally got out. I promptly got out, dried myself off, and went into my bedroom to get changed. ?I wonder what I should wear today,? I thought to myself as I started rummaging through my clothes. Finally I settled on an orange striped shirt and a pair of black shorts.

?Ben, breakfast is ready,? my dad called for me from down the stairs.

Right on cue I arrived in the kitchen. I saw that my food was waiting for me on the table. I quickly sat down and wolfed the food down. I looked down at my watch and saw that I was running late. ?Hey dad. I?m running late. I have to get going,? I stated in a rush as I stood up from the table to grab my backpack and shoes.

?Alright son. I hope you have a great day. Don?t let that boy get to you alright??

?Alright dad,? I laughed. It was amazing. I didn?t think of Briar once until my dad mentioned him. Maybe it won?t be so bad. I rushed out of the door and started sprinting towards the bus stop. I saw Briar at the bus stop. ?Maybe I should just ignore him. He does hate me after all,? I convinced myself. I sat down on the curb, five feet away from him. Neither of us said a word. The bus came and we didn?t say a word to each other. ?Why was he ignoring me? Did he hate me after what I told him yesterday? Did I royally screw everything up? Maybe I misjudged him? No I didn?t. It?s my fault that this happened. I never should have told him that I was gay,? I convinced myself.

The bus drove up to the curb, and Briar and I were the first ones on the bus, other than the driver of course. He got on first, and wandered to the back, while I stayed in the front seats. My short height of 5?3? would allow me to blend into the Elementary section of the bus easily. The ride was uneventful, and all the kids around me kept screaming, and crawled all over me. I didn?t care. I was too upset about Briar to care about the kids. Eventually we rolled up to the high school, and I quickly got out. The bell started to ring. I rushed to class, ten strides in front of Briar. It turns out that our teacher decided it would be fun to make us a seating chart and sit me right next to Briar. Great. This was going to turn out good. She gave us a boring lecture on rules and I got up and went to the bathroom midway.

I wondered aimlessly around the building searching for the bathroom. I didn?t mind wasting any time. I wanted to be away from Briar for a while. Eventually I found the bathroom and I walked into it. I was the only one in it. ?Yes,? I thought to myself. I hated it when someone else was in the bathroom. I stood upright at the urinal and started doing my business.

?Hey there cutie, you have a gift for me??A mysterious voice called to me. I swing around to see a boy standing there. ?Well? Do you or do you not have money for me?? He begins walking closer. It was clear that he wanted my lunch money.

With viper speed I zipped up my shorts am was ready to run away at any moment. My knees were jelly. ?Um, no. I don?t,? I mutter.

?What was that?? he asked rhetorically while walking closer to me.

?I said I don?t have any money for you!? I screamed at him loudly so I could call for help at the same time.

He stopped and shifted his stance. ?Wrong answer,? he stated calmly, but his body was anything less than calm. He lurched forward at me and landed a punch to the stomach. I crumpled to the floor, clutching my gut in agony. Soon his foot met the rest of me. He started kicking me repetitively in my stomach, legs, and upper torso. The pain was too much to handle and I blacked out.

Chapter 8: Briar?s Morning Salute

I awoke the next morning with a sense of strangeness beating down on my face. It gets light here early in Arizona and I always have my blinds open, but I closed them last night. I didn?t want Ben watching me while I slept. Things were uneasy now. The morning was the usual. I had my breakfast of cereal and I got ready for school. I couldn?t get the thought of him saying, ?So you probably hate me then,? out of my head. I could never hate Ben. He was too great of a guy for me to hate him.

After I finished prepping for school, I ventured out to wait for my bus. Since there were no benches to sit on, I just sat on the ground and waiting. Ben ended up showing up soon too. We looked at each other but neither of us said a word. The bus rolled up eventually and as the first two people on the bus, we got our pick of seats. I sat in the back corner like I usually do and he sat in the elementary section of the bus. We rode the bus ride in silence. Hardly anyone was ever on the bus in the morning since their parents could drop them off on their way to work. We got to the school with minutes to spare. The bell ended up ringing as soon as we stepped inside and we hurried off to biology.

Mrs. Jefferson was there to welcome us each into the classroom individually, and told us to look at the board for the new seating chart. She put me right next to Ben. Half way through the lecture on the rules, Ben excused himself to go use the bathroom. 15 minutes elapsed and Mrs. Jefferson sent me out to look for him.

?Out of everyone she could have chose to look for that dweeb, she had to choose me. What do I look like? That kid?s babysitter?? I grumbled as I trudged down the hall, not really looking for him.

?I said I don?t have a gift for you!? Ben cried in the distance. I perked my head and I knew that he was in trouble. I started to run around the winding hallways, to search for Ben. I kept hearing him scream and cry. Then suddenly, it stopped. I skidded to a halt outside of the boys? bathroom. I see a bulky guy, around 6?1? running out of the bathroom. I couldn?t think of anything except to save Ben. I sprint into the bathroom, and I see Ben, lying bloody on the floor, knocked out. I kneel down to him and I grab some paper towels, and I put his head on my lap, and call for help.

Chapter 9: Two Destinies Meet

?Dude, wake up,? a voice called to me while shaking my body. I groaned. ?Dude, come on back to earth,? he called again.

I slowly began to stir. I blinked once, then twice, and once again. I felt my head in a cushion of some sort. My vision was slowly starting to come back to me. The profile of the boy who was holding me came into focus. He looked like an angel; the light above him formed a halo around him. ?Bri, Briar. What are you doing here?? I asked slowly, still in a daze.

?Shhh,? he whispered as he put his finger on my lips, ?You?re going to be okay. You?re safe now. I?ve got you. I?m going to go get you help.?

?Please Briar, don?t. Please don?t leave,? I plead. I was almost into tears. I waited to see what he would do. He didn?t move again. He stayed sitting with my head resting on his lap. We stayed like that for minutes until at last our nirvana was ended abruptly. I guess Mrs. Jefferson must have gotten worried about us because she sent another kid into the bathroom to look for us.

Briar was alerted first and quickly looked up. ?Finally someone shows up. Quick go get help,? Briar ordered at the boy in the doorway.

The boy ran off and emerged later with a two school security guards and Mrs. Jefferson. There wasn?t any lack of screaming and squealing. Almost immediately Mrs. Jefferson pushed Briar away and helped pick me up. ?You! You did this! Didn?t you!? she screamed viciously while point a finger at Briar.

?Much to your disappointment, I did nothing,? Briar conceded, shrugging the accusation off.

?You liar!? she yelled as she dropped me and ran over to Briar. She was angry for some reason. I could tell. She readied a fist for Briar and was about to strike him. Within a blink of the eye, Briar had caught her fist midair, twisted around behind her, and was now holding her hands behind her back. She couldn?t do anything else. She was stuck. She struggled but Briar didn?t let go.

?I told you. I didn?t do anything,? he said with eyes of fire. The security guards rushed over and quickly detained Mrs. Jefferson. ?It would be wise to go with the officers Ben. They will want to know what will happen to you, and I?m sure they want me to tell my side of the story as well. Isn?t that right?? he asked sarcastically towards the security guards.

?That would be helpful, yes,? one of the security guards said.

?Alright. Here is how it is going to go down. One of you should take Mrs. Jefferson to the office or wherever you are going to take her. The other one of you should help me bring Ben to the nurses? office and do with me as you must to get the witness statements. Any questions?? Briar directed. He was taking charge. He vocalized everything firmly and smooth. To my shock, the guards listened to him. Like directed, one of the guards took Mrs. Jefferson away from us, while the other one helped Briar escort me to the nurses office.

I slowly stood up. It hurt. My bones were feeble and my skin was bruised. I slowly trudged along the cement trail to the nurses? office. ?Can?t imagine what is going to happen. I didn?t get a good look at my assailant?s face, so he is probably going to walk free. Mrs. Jefferson probably won?t be teaching us anymore after she almost injured Briar. Briar might get in trouble for stopping Mrs. Jefferson, but I am not sure. All I know is that I didn?t want Briar to suffer for helping me and defending himself.? I thought to myself as I watched the ground.

The painful walk was a quick one. It didn?t take long to stroll through the desert heat in midsummer, over a field and into the office doors. I was greeted with the cool ac air as I emerged into the nurses? office. I was quickly overwhelmed with the familiar scent of illness. My eyes remained glued to the floor. I felt one set of hands let go of me. I could tell by the shoes that the security guard had gone off to talk to the nurse about what had happened. Briar ushered me down into a cushioned seat.

?Hey dude, how are you doing?? Briar asked me whilst he placed himself next to me.

?I?ve been better,? I joked, trying to hide the pain and fear I was feeling.

?You?re safe now. I may not know what happened amidst the confusion of today, but I want you to know that you are safe,? he attempted to reassure me by placing his hand on my still sore back.

?Briar. I have a question,? I stated with my eyes now lifted and staring into his.

?Yeah dude. What is it?? Briar asked, puzzled.

?Even after I told you I was gay, you are still being my friend and being helpful. Why?? I inquired. ?Why am I even asking this question? Why can?t I just keep my mouth shut?? I asked myself.

There was a long pause in the bustle of the nurses? office. I was worried that I asked him too much. Soon a loquacious voice broke the silence. ?Oh my word. What happened to you, you poor little boy?? the nurse bellowed as she rushed over to Ben.

I began explaining my story to her. I could tell that she wasn?t happy with the events that unfolded prior. She was on the verge of tears, I could tell. I didn?t like it. I don?t want a stranger to feel sorry for me. While I was telling my story, I became aware of the lack of people in the nurses? office. Briar had left with the security guard. ?I hope he?ll be alright,? I thought to myself. There wasn?t a surplus of sick students in here either. In fact, I was practically alone. I felt abandoned. I didn?t have the support of Briar anymore and no one I knew was here. ?I guess that it is better that my friends aren?t here. They would probably make fun of me if they saw me now.?

?Ben hun, can you come over here?? a nurse called to me as she patted an examining bed. Without a verbal response, I trudged over to the table with my head held down. ?Where does it hurt?? she inquired.

?Everywhere,? I moaned.

?Well immediately, I can tell that nothing is broken. You managed to get here so that is a pretty good sign. I am going to call your father right now. I would like him to be here with you. I?ll be right back,? she stated as she walked to her private office and called my dad.

I sat there alone on the bed, unsure of what to think of. ?I hope Briar is doing alright. I hope I?m alright,? I thought to myself as I sat in silence. It didn?t take long till I heard a chime ring. Our nurses? office had a bell on the door to alert the nurse when someone would come in. I perked my head up. It was Briar.

?Hey dude. How?s it going,? he waltzed in casually.

?I?ve been better. She doesn?t think that I have any broken bones, but she?s calling my dad. I?m probably going to be heading home early today. What about you? How did the thing go?? I responded, eager to learn what had unfolded whilst I was trapped in this mausoleum.

?Hardly anything. They just asked me if I wanted to press charges on Mrs. Jefferson and I said no. She doesn?t deserve it. She?ll probably be put on an administrative leave or get fired. If she stays, then I am switching out of her class,? Briar responded while shrugging his shoulders.

?Oh,? I stated grimly.

?What?s the matter?? he asked as he sauntered over to the bed I was on.

?Well if you switch, then we won?t be in the same biology class,? I muttered while looking away from him.

?Don?t worry about it Ben. She?ll probably get fired. I don?t think we need to worry about switching,? he tried to reassure me by placing his arm around my shoulder.

?Ouch,? I whispered. I was in pain everywhere. Every minor touch or movement hurt me more and more.

He quickly released his grasp. ?I?m sorry,? he stated, avoiding further physical contact, ?I didn?t mean to hurt you.?

?It?s alright dude. I know you didn?t mean it,? I attempted to reassure him. We stayed in silence for a few moments till the nurse walked in again.

She immediately walked over to me, ignoring Briar completely. ?Well, your dad will be here in a few minutes so we can talk a few things over,? she stated. It wasn?t till she was finished that she noticed Briar waiting amongst the chairs. ?And what can I do for you today you little sweetie pie?? she asked him in a fake southern accent.

?You can make Ben get better,? he stated, putting his concerns for himself aside.

?I wonder why he said that. Does he actually care for me?? I thought to myself.

?I?ll do my best hun,? the nurse replied to Briar?s statement. She then left the room to go do something in her office.

?So dude, are you going home or staying?? I peeped.

?I have to stay. My mom is down town Phoenix working. I would have no way to get home till the buses come,? he shrugged off. He seemed sad that he had to stay, but he was more concerned for me.

?Maybe my dad can take you home. We are neighbors after all,? I joked. Briar didn?t laugh.

?I wish I could, but school policy won?t let me. I can?t leave alone and I can?t leave with someone else?s parents,? Briar stated coldly. I could tell that it was killing him inside. Or was I just imagining it?

?That sucks. I really wanted you to come with me,? I whispered lowly so that only he could hear me.

?I?ll tell you what. How about I come over right afterschool to see how you are doing?? Briar offered with a slight smile.

?Only if you want to come. I don?t want to force you over,? I shyly replied.

?It won?t be a problem. I?ll be happy to come over,? Briar insisted. He then started looking around in a panic.

?What?s up dude? Why are you frantically looking?? I asked, curious about his behavior.

?Where are our backpacks?? he asked, still frantic.

?Oh crap. I think they are still in Mrs. Jefferson?s room,? I stated in shock. ?Why is he thinking of backpacks at a time like this??

?I?ll be right back dude. I?m going to go grab our things,? he stated as he dashed out the door.

?Briar, wait!? I called to him, but I was too late. He was already gone. I was left alone in the nurses? office. ?What should I do now?? I thought as I lay down upon the bed in the nurses? office.

It didn?t take long for the nurse to come back out of her office after she heard the bell chime. ?Who was that?? She inquired dumbfounded.

I perked my head towards her direction. ?Briar just went to go grab our bags from our class. He should be back soon,? I informed her.

?Oh. Okay. I wonder what?s keeping your father. He should be here by now, shouldn?t he?? She asked rhetorically as she walked back into her office.

I glanced at the clock. Almost an hour had elapsed since she called my dad. We only live 5 minutes away.?She?s right. He should be here by now. What?s taking him so long??I pondered to myself deep in thought. ?Did something happen to him?? I began to worry. I let out a muffled cry. ?Please. Please let him be safe.? My sobs grew louder and more frightening. Minute by minute I became more frightful for what happened to my dad.

I heard a chime and I lifted my head up, lifting my tears. I had hoped that it was my dad. Much to my disappointment, it was Briar. He quickly dropped our bags and rushed over to me when he saw me crying. He said nothing. He sat next to me and pulled me into a deep hug. My pain had been subdued with fear, and I wept into Briar?s shoulder.

Chapter 10

I felt safe in Briar?s arms. In his arms, I felt like nothing could hurt me. Suddenly, I heard another chime of the office door, but I didn?t care who was there. I just wanted this hug to last. Briar must have decided that the hug had gone on long enough and broke it. I wiped my eyes, and I looked up to see my dad standing in the door way.

?Dad! Thank god you?re okay!? I exclaimed as I ran to give him a hug. I was so happy that he was alive. I don?t know why I was freaking out, but all that mattered now is that my dad was safe.

?Oh Mr.Wilkins, I am glad to made it. I am sure Ben is eager to get home to rest,? the nurse stated, walking towards my dad.

?Please Miss, it?s John. And I think that I should take my son home now. He looks like he had a rough day,? my dad spoke. I couldn?t help but wonder what was going to happen with Briar. I feel bad about leaving him here.

?And what of Briar? Will you be taking him home as well?? the nurse spoke again.

My dad faced to look at Briar, ?Would you like a ride home? I believe we have a few things we need to talk about.?

?Yes John, I believe that we do have some things to talk about,? Briar stated calmly.

We walked out of the office, and my dad signed us both out. We walked out the front entrance of the school and entered my dad?s ?97 pickup.

?Sorry Briar, but it?s only a 2 seater. So you can either have Ben sit on your lap, or ride in the back,? my dad stated nonchalantly and winked at me. I couldn?t help but blush. ?Was my dad trying to hook me up??

?I don?t have a problem with Ben sitting on my lap, that is, if he doesn?t mind,? Briar calmly stated in reply.

?Oh my god! This can?t be happening can it? Am I really going to get to ride on Briar?s lap?? I pinched myself to make sure that this wasn?t a dream. It wasn?t.

Chapter 11: Too Good to be True

We loaded up into my dad?s truck. I crawled onto Briar?s lap, and relaxed. I leant back against his soft, yet strong stomach. I notched my head into the crook between his neck and the seat. I felt his arms warp around my, and his hands stop on my stomach. He held me onto him during the drive home. How time moves quickly when you want a moment to last forever, since we now arrived at my house. My dad was the first one out of the truck, and he left to go unlock the front door. I didn?t want to move, but then Briar spoke, ?Hey dude, we should probably go inside.? He had long since released his grip on me, and I sluggishly slid off of his lap.

We began the quick journey to the front door, where my dad was waiting for us. We all walked in together, and Ben led me to the couches. ?Can I offer you something to drink Briar? We have lemonade, tea, some coke, water, milk, almost anything you can think of,? my dad offered him.

?Some lemonade would be lovely John,? Briar stated in response. I couldn?t believe how calm Briar was. Usually when I have to talk to my friends parents, I shake in fear and call them sir or ma?am, yet Briar was confident. We plopped down onto the loveseat together. We didn?t have much room so our legs and arms were touching.

My dad walked to us in the living room with two glasses of lemonade. He passed one to me and one to Briar. ?So, which one of you are going to tell me why my boy is all bruised up?? my dad asked, getting down to business.

?Ben, I think you should,? Briar stated towards me.

?But, but, why me?? I asked, not wishing to be on the spot.

?Because you were there for the beginning. I wasn?t.?

?He does have a point,? I thought to myself. ?Alright. I guess I?ll try to tell the story.? I began to retell the story to my father. He started with the face of a thousand sorrows, but as the story went on, he became happier since he knew that Briar saved me. He was still shocked about what happened, I could tell, but I shrugged it off.

My dad then walked over to Briar. ?Briar, I owe you so much right now for saving my boy?s life. You will always have a place in this family,? he stated, as he reached down and gave Briar a giant hug. I could tell that my dad was crying. He never cried before. I could also here Briar release a little cry. I went and leaned into the hug, and we all wrapped our arms around each other. I started to cry as well.

Soon our hug broke and my father said that he had to be getting back to work. ?Ah ha! So that?s why it took so long for him to get to the school! Why didn?t I think of that?? I thought to myself, proud that I found an explanation. My dad left Briar and me alone in the house. We heard the locking of the doorknob. We sat on the loveseat together. Now that we were alone, I decided to muster up the courage to ask Briar a dire question. ?Briar. Can I ask you something??

Briar looked shocked at the suddenness of the question, but he stated, ?Sure dude. Go ahead.?

?Yesterday, you got scared when I told you that I was gay. But today, you saved my life. Why? Why did you do that? If you hate me for being gay, then why waste your time on me?? I asked urgently. I wanted to know. I wanted to know why he did the things he did for me.

Briar took a few seconds to answer. I feared that I was too direct. My heart started pounding more and more, with each moment of waiting. ?Ben. I never said that I hated you. What you said yesterday, just caught me by surprise. I have been questioning myself for a little bit, and wondering who I am. I still don?t know who I am. I am confused in every sense of the word. I don?t know if I am gay or bisexual, but what I do know is that, ever since I laid eyes on you, I have been having an attraction for you. At first I thought it was nothing, but then I kept wondering what is that I was feeling. I wanted to be straight. I couldn?t stand the idea of being gay, but today I realized that I don?t care what a label means. What matters is that I love you. When I heard you screaming and wailing, I began to panic. If I had known that the guy who left the bathroom was your attacker, he would be dead. I don?t want to see you hurt. It pains me too much.? Briar moved away from me and sat there. You could hear a pin drop in this deathly silence.

?Briar. I don?t know what to say. I love you. I always have. I couldn?t believe my eyes when I saw you. I want to be with you Briar!? I cried out. I went forward to clamp him into a hug, and he returned the gesture. I knew that our lives would be different from that point on.

Chapter 12: Rude Awakenings

?Where are our backpacks?? I asked, looking around the room at a frantic pace. My backpack had belonged to my father who was an ex marine. It was the only thing I had left of him, and I couldn?t lose it.

?Oh crap. I think they are still in Mrs. Jefferson?s room,? Ben stated in reply.

?I?ll be right back dude. I?m going to go grab our things,? I stated. Before he could reply, I was out the door, dashing towards the biology room. I quietly ran through the building and once I got to the classroom, I saw all of my classmates just hanging out and talking to each other. Knowing them, they probably would have started making rumors about Ben and what he was doing away for so long. I grabbed his stuff and mine, and I was about to slip away undetected, but Trinity had to see me.

?Hey Briar! Hold up!? she half called and half demanded. ?What was taking you guys so long and where is Mrs. Jefferson??

?Well Mrs. Jefferson is currently in the company of the police. Ben was being beat up in the bathroom, and I had to take him to the nurse and talk to the police. Any more questions? Nope. Good. See you all later.? With that I made my leave, and slinked my way back towards the Nurses? office.

I went back to the office as fast as the wind could carry me, and stepped into the Nurses? office and was greeted by the familiar chime. The Nurses? office was always my least favorite place to be. It reminded me too much about death. I heard a muffled cry and noticed that Ben was crying.

I did not say a word. Instead I rushed over to him and pulled him into a very tight hug to let him know that I would always be there for him. It pained me to see him in distress. A chime shattered the silence. Ben looked up to see his dad walking in, and he broke the hug and dashed over to his dad and gave him a tight hug. I decided that I would let them be together and sit alone and in silence. I tuned out the adult voices until I heard the nurse say my name.

?And what of Briar? Will you be taking him home as well?? asked the Nurse in a get-rid-of-him attitude.

John shifted his attention towards me and asked, ?Would you like a ride home? I believe we have a few things we need to talk about.?

?Yes. I would like to talk to him. I have to tell him about how I feel about his son?s safety. I have to tell him that I love his son. I have to tell him that I wanted to get revenge on the attacker, but how? How can I tell him, a total strange how I feel?? I asked myself before I finally uttered, ?Yes John, I believe that we do have some things to talk about.?

Chapter 13

?Sorry Briar, but it?s only a 2 seater. So you can either have Ben sit on your lap, or ride in the back,? John stated.

The idea of riding in the back where there would be no safety bothered me, yet I know it would have been either Ben or me in the back, so I simply stated, ?I don?t have a problem with Ben sitting on my lap, that is, if he doesn?t mind.?

I could almost swear that I saw John wink at his son, but I decided that I should just let it be and not bother with it. I slowly climbed into the ?97 pickup first. Then I helped Ben get settled onto my lap. I could tell that he loved sitting on me. He leaned against my chest and let out a sigh. I wrapped my arms around his waist and started thinking, ?Is this what is supposed to happen? Am I supposed to fall in love with a boy, after knowing him for two days? Can I love a boy? No. It can?t be. I?m straight for Christ?s sake! I?m not gay!? We road in silence. I could feel our heartbeats intertwined in ease.

After about 5 minutes, we pulled up to their house. His dad rose from the truck and left to go unlock the front door. I dropped my arms from Ben?s waist, hoping that it would be a strong enough hint to make him get up and move, but he didn?t.

, ?Hey dude, we should probably go inside.? I stated, wishing to be released from this section of the rollercoaster of self confusion.

?Can I offer you something to drink Briar? We have lemonade, tea, some coke, water, milk, almost anything you can think of,? John offered me as we walked into the great room.

?Some lemonade would be lovely John,? I stated calmly, wishing to just get this over with. Ben led me to the living room and we sat together on the loveseat. Ben kept getting closer to me, but I shrugged it off.

John soon walked in with two glasses of lemonade, and passed them to each of us. It was clear that John wanted to get straight to the point. ?So, which one of you are going to tell me why my boy is all bruised up?? my dad asked, getting down to business.

An awkward silence consumed us, until I finally said ?Ben, I think you should.?

?But, but, why me?? He asked, stuttering. I could tell that he didn?t really know what to say or how to explain it to his father.

?Because you were there for the beginning. I wasn?t.?

?Alright. I guess I?ll try to tell the story.? Ben started to tell his father about everything that happened today. I watched John?s face carefully. He was becoming overrun with emotions. I could tell that he felt sorrow for his son. I could tell that he was angry and the assailant. I could tell that he loved his son very much.

Suddenly John shifted his attention towards me. ?Briar, I owe you so much right now for saving my boy?s life. You will always have a place in this family,? he stated, as he reached down and gripped me into a giant embrace. I could tell that John was tearing up. I couldn?t help but cry. His hug reminded me of something I never got as a kid. My father never hugged me, so right now, John was the closest thing I had. I started to cry along side of him, and Ben came up and wrapped his arms around his father and me. He started crying, thinking about how fortunate he was.

John suddenly broke the group hug and told us that he had to go to work, and he left Ben and me alone. We sat together on the loveseat, still touching. Ben spoke and broke the silence. ?Briar. Can I ask you something??

His question shocked me and scared me. I couldn?t tell what he was going to ask, so I stated, ?Sure dude. Go ahead.?

?Yesterday, you got scared when I told you that I was gay. But today, you saved my life. Why? Why did you do that? If you hate me for being gay, then why waste your time on me?? Ben asked, prodding for any answer.

?What do I tell him? Ben, I love you. I always have? I?m straight, not gay? I don?t know! I?m too confused!? I yelled into my head. I needed time to think. I finally started to speak, ?Ben. I never said that I hated you. What you said yesterday just caught me by surprise. I have been questioning myself for a little bit, and wondering who I am. I still don?t know who I am. I am confused in every sense of the word. I don?t know if I am gay or bisexual, but what I do know is that, ever since I laid eyes on you, I have been having an attraction for you. At first I thought it was nothing, but then I kept wondering what is that I was feeling. I wanted to be straight. I couldn?t stand the idea of being gay, but today I realized that I don?t care what a label means. What matters is that I love you. When I heard you screaming and wailing, I began to panic. If I had known that the guy who left the bathroom was your attacker, he would be dead. I don?t want to see you hurt. It pains me too much.? I moved away from Ben. It was getting awkward. ?I?m such an idiot! I never should have told Ben that!? I yelled to myself. An odd silence enraptured my thoughts.

Ben, being the one who felt responsible stated, ?Briar. I don?t know what to say. I love you. I always have. I couldn?t believe my eyes when I saw you. I want to be with you Briar!?

From that moment on, I could tell that my life was going to change.

Chapter 14

Several days passed until Ben managed to return to school. Briar had of course gone back after the first day of being gone. However, every day after school, Briar would show up to Ben?s house to watch over him while his dad was at work. Since it was still the beginning of school, there wasn?t much school work or homework to do, but every day, Briar would pick up Ben?s homework and take it to his house. Since then, they haven?t said much else about their love, but Ben was sure that rumors were flying around the school.

It was the morning of Monday, on the 2nd week of school. Ben had finally recovered from his attack enough to start going to school. Briar had stayed the night, for his mom was working late, and John didn?t want him being home.

The sun rose above the horizon, and filtered into the bedroom where Ben and Briar were sharing a bed. John had walked into the room, to wake the boys up, and saw them lying in each other?s arms. ?Come on boys, it?s time to get up and get ready for school. Breakfast is on its way. Get showered up and come downstairs when you?re ready,? he spoke, gently but demandingly.

?Urg,? both of the boys groaned as they slowly stirred to life.

?Morning babe. How?d you sleep?? Briar asked as he stared into Ben?s crystalline eyes, arms still wrapped around Ben.

?Great, since I?m waking up next to you,? Ben stated in reply, ?But I guess we should get up to get ready to go.?

?Yeah. You?re probably right. I should head over to my house to grab some clothes and say hello to my mom,? Briar stated, as he rose from the bed.

?Yeah okay. I guess I?ll see you a little bit later then,? Ben sadly stated, as he also rose from the bed.

?Don?t worry, I?ll be back as soon as I can,? Briar stated as he ran out the bedroom door.

Chapter 15: Come on Mom

Briar left Ben?s house in a hurry. He wanted to get back there to spend more time with Ben. He dashed up his driveway, barely avoiding his mom?s car. He went up the front door, clicked it open, and stepped inside the house.

?And where were you last night?? Briar?s mom asked coldly as he walked into the great room.

?I was at Ben?s house mom!? Briar snapped back at her.

She walked into the great room with her arms snaked together. ?Did I say you could stay the night at Ben?s house?? she asked rhetorically.

?No. You didn?t, but you?re never home to ask. You are always at that job of yours,? Briar stated in response.

?Hey! That job puts food on the table, a roof over your head, and clothes on your back! And you are going to complain that I don?t spend enough time with you? You selfish brat!?

?I never said that you didn?t spend enough time with me. My point was that you are never around to ask the questions,? Briar countered.

?Just who is this Ben person? Obviously he is a bad influence on you. You used to be such a nice boy, but now you are just a selfish boy who owns the world and everything around him!? She snapped back.

?You don?t know him mom! Ben isn?t causing this, you are!? Briar shouted to her, as he stormed past her, and up to his room. He slammed his door closed. ?Stupid mom! Thinking she knows Ben! What?s her problem anyway?? He yelled at himself as he started packing up a couple outfits to last him a few days.

After his bags were packed, he walked down the stairs leading to the kitchen and living room combo? ?Where do you think you?re going?? his mom asked sharply.

?To Ben?s,? Briar stated as he left his house. We solemnly walked down the concrete drive, holding back his tears. We walked next door to Ben?s house and knocked on the door. Once, then twice.

Chapter 16

Ben was upstairs in his room, after stepping out of his shower, when he heard a couple knocks on the door. He called down to his dad and asked him to open the door. He was up in the room and he heard his dad open the door.

?Hey Briar. What?s wrong my boy?? Ben heard his father say. Ben, shocked by what his dad say, ran out of his room and onto the loft which over looked the front entryway. Ben looked down and saw his dad hugging Briar. He could see that Briar was crying, and hurried down the stairs to see what was wrong.

?Briar, what?s wrong?? Ben questioned as he pushed his dad out of the way, and pulled Briar into a hug. John led them into the living room to talk things over.

Briar started to relay the story when a sudden knock came at the door. John went to answer it so the boys could talk it over.

John strolled through the main foyer and opened up the white door to see the sight of Briar?s mother.

?Where the hell is my boy!? she half asked, and half demanded.

?Ah. You must be Briar?s mom? Is that correct? Hello my name is John, I am Ben?s father,? he introduced himself to her.

?I don?t care what your name is! I am taking my son back with me right now!? she screamed as she tried to enter the house.

?I think you should calm down before you do something that you might regret later,? John stated, not budging.

?I think that you should let my boy go before I report you to the authorities for kidnapping.?

?I think that you should calm down before I report you to the authorities for child neglect, breaking and entering, and abuse,? John stated, making his intention clear.

?Do you know who I am! I am Margret William! A state respected defense attorney! If you think that you will get to keep my child, then you are very well mistaken!?

The boys, upturned by the noise coming from the great room, found their way to the front door to see what was going on, hand in hand.

?Mom, what are you doing here?? Briar asked shocked.

The mom saw the two boys holding hands. ?Oh! So that?s why you are staying over here. You?re a fag aren?t you? And Ben is your butt buddy! Isn?t that right!? she yelled towards Briar. She then shifted her attention to John. ?I?m sorry for wasting your time John. Briar is nothing to me anymore. I hope you won?t mind taking care of that fag of a boy for me.? Briar sunk to his knees and started crying.

?Margret, I would be happy to watch Briar until you can change your bigoted ways. Good day!? John yelled as he slammed the door shut. He turned around and saw Briar on the ground, being held by Ben. ?So I know this is a dumb question to ask, but are you guys still going to school today??

The silence was overwhelming until Briar spoke, ?Yeah. I?ll go. I need to get my mind off of this morning for a little bit.?

?Alright Briar. I?ll go too then, but until then, I think we need to get ready to go,? Ben stated, motioning to his towel. The rest of the morning was uneventful. Briar took his shower and got dressed, while Ben went to get dressed and grab some breakfast.

Chapter 17

Soon they were both ready and marched out the door and climbed into the ?97 pickup truck. Once again Ben road on Briar?s lap for the ride. They didn?t mind, and they road in silence. As they pulled up to the school, Ben thought that other kids were noticed that he was on Briar?s lap. ?Oh great. They are probably going to start spreading rumors about us all over the place,? Ben thought.

?Don?t worry about it dude,? Briar stated, trying to reassure Ben. He could tell that Ben was scared about what others would think.

They stepped out of the truck in front of the school, and a group of Briar?s friends noticed that Ben was on Briar?s lap before they could get out of the truck, and they waited for Briar and Ben to get out so they could question them.

?Yo Briar, my main man! Wazzup?? asked one of the vultures who were hounding the truck, ignoring Ben all together.

?Nothing much. What about you guys?? Briar asked nonchalantly.

?What was with that dweeb on your lap in that beat out, piece of shit truck?? another one of the boys asked.

?He?s my friend Ben. Something came up, and I had to get a ride with him. Any questions?? Briar asked, wanting to get this confrontation over with.

?Nah man. It?s cool. Catch you later,? the first boy spoke as they walked off.

Ben and Briar strolled through the courtyard of their high school. For obvious reasons, they avoided holding hands. They were 20 minutes early to the school, so they walked to the hallway of their first class, Biology. The hallway was in the back of the last building of school, so hardly anyone came down the hallway. The boys felt comfortable and alone enough to sit by each other, and rest their heads on each other?s shoulders and hold hands. They say in quiet for a while until Ben finally spoke, ?Briar, are you embarrassed by me??

Briar was shocked by this question. ?What do you mean??

?Well earlier you didn?t say anything to those guys that we are dating.?

?Ben. It?s not that I?m embarrassed by you. I just don?t want people to know that we are together yet, or gay for that matter.?

?Yeah. I guess you?re right. I don?t think I am ready for that either. I guess I am okay with our secret relationship for now.?

Just then, the cackle of girls waltzed down the hall, and saw Briar and Ben snuggled up together. ?Oh my god! Briar! You?re gay?? the girls cried out together.

Briar and Ben just looked at each other and gave each other a well-that-was-quick look. Briar spoke up and stated, ?Yes. And in case you couldn?t tell, I?m dating Ben.?

?Oh em gee Briar. You can do so much better that that nobody. You?re hot and you are dating that ugly dude? Gross!? the girls wailed together.

Briar?s look turned sour, and Ben looked like he was about to cry. ?Shut up you blonde bitches! I don?t care what you say! I love Ben and that?s all that matters. Tell anyone you want. Make me unpopular. I don?t care. I don?t need fake friends when I have a love,? Briar stated coldly to the girls.

?Whatever Briar. You?re going to be a fun challenge to convert to be straight. You will be mine Briar!? Jessica, the stereotypical blonde-who-won?t-take-no-for-an-answer-cheerleader squealed. Just then, the bell rang and the girls went inside, knowing that they lost and didn?t need to say anything else.

Ben and Briar were silent as the girls walked in. Then Ben spoke up. ?Did you really mean it Briar??

?Of course I did.?

Chapter 18

The two strolled into the classroom at the same time, ignoring the smirks by the blonde chicks. They saw a new teacher sitting at Mrs. Jefferson?s desk. He looked to be a young teacher, inexperienced. She glanced over at them, acknowledging their presence. As they were taking their seats, Briar found a note waiting for him at his desk.

?You will be mine Briar,

Love Jessica?

Briar read. After he finished, he crumpled the note up and threw it into the trash. He then looked over at Jessica. ?No I won?t,? he stated coldly

Ben leaned over towards Briar and asked, ?What did the note say??

?It was nothing. Just Jessica being the blonde she is.?

At this point the new teacher had walked over to the two boys and started to introduce himself. ?Hello young man. I don?t believe we?ve been introduced. I am Mr. Kennedy, and I will be your new biology teacher. I don?t know if you heard, but Mrs. Jefferson was fired on account of the fact that she struck a student. So here I am. What is your name?? he asked Ben.

?Ben sir.?

?Well Ben, it?s good to meet you and glad to see you showed up today.? With that Mr. Kennedy let the boys be, and he went to the front to get class started. ?Alright class. Happy Monday. Today we will start talking about diffusion of water and solvents into cells. To start the unit off, we will begin by watching a video about how cells absorb different materials. I won?t lie. It?s not the most interesting video, but I believe it goes over the material very well. Alright so sit back, take everything off your desks and enjoy the movie.? With that, the movie was started, and various whispers were heard around the room. Briar looked around and noticed that everyone was whispering in chains and looking at him and Ben. Ben however was watching the movie the whole time and didn?t notice what was going on.

Suddenly, Kyle, a football player stood up in the middle of the classroom and yelled, ?Everyone, listen up! Ben and Briar are butt-buddies!? He pointed directly at the boys. Everyone shifted their eyes at the boys. They didn?t know what to do. ?Those two are queers! They don?t even have the balls to fight back! No wonder they?re queers! They?ll never get girlfriends! Even if they wanted them!? Kyle called again.

?That is enough Kyle!? Mr. Kennedy hollered.

Ben suddenly stood up on his chair and he started shouting in return, ?Shut the fuck up Kyle! So you think that I actually care what you think? Ha! Don?t make me laugh. You are nothing Kyle. So what if I like Briar? Is that any of your business? No it?s not. So mind your own fucking business and shut the fuck up!? Ben climbed off of the desk and stood in the aisle of desks that Kyle was in.

The class was silent, and the movie had been paused. No one dared to speak, until Kyle uttered, ?You?re still a fruit.? The class erupted into laughter.

?And you are scum who has play football to let go of his anger because let?s face it, your parents are ashamed of you,? Ben countered. He started to walk back towards his desk, his back facing Kyle.

Kyle quickly rummaged through his bag and pulled out a gun. ?Fuck you Ben!? He screamed and squeezed the trigger. Briar had seen the gun being pulled, and leaped out of his chair.

Time seemed as if it were on slow motion while Briar was dashing over to Ben. Briar quickly outstretched his body and shoved Ben out of the way of the bullet. However, during the jump, the bullet had pierced through Briar?s stomach, and crimson blood splattered across the room.

Chapter 19

Blood patterned the walls. Time wasn?t moving. I looked and was pushed out of the way by the one I loved. ?What is going on? Where is the blood coming out of from me? Why is Briar jumping on me?? I thought as I lay on the ground, being covered by Briar?s corpse. Kids were screaming all around me, afraid of what was happening. I couldn?t move. I heard a groan and I saw Mr. Kennedy tackling Kyle from above me. I heard Kyle struggling. Boom. I heard another gun shot.

?Somebody call 9-1-1!? Mr. Kennedy cried out, as he rose from the ground. He immediately ran over to Briar and me. He pulled Briar off of me, and laid him on his back. I immediately got up, and put Briar?s hand in mine and started to cry. ?Briar. Hold on. Please Briar. I can?t lose you,? I pleaded, hoping that he would make it.

I heard sirens running in the distance. Students circled around us, wondering what was going to happen. I shot a death stare over at Jessica. I knew that her and her friends had caused this, and by the looks of her face, so did she.

I heard the door blast open and paramedics started filling into the room. With nary a word, they quickly got Briar onto a stretcher, stopped the bleeding and pulled him out of the room. ?Briar,? I sighed out, knowing that his life was in their hands. They also had a second stretcher. I wondered what for, and then I realized that they were pulling Kyle out of the room as well. He looked like he was shot in the same place as Briar.

Faculty rushed into the room next, and demanded to know what was happening. I didn?t care what they were saying. It seemed like Mr. Kennedy was handling it fine. I excused myself from the crowd, and sat in the story, and started to cry harder. ?Jessica. This is all your fault. If you hadn?t been a bitch and told everyone, my Briar would still be alive. I guess you aren?t fully to blame. Maybe if Briar and I weren?t holding hands, you wouldn?t have noticed. It?s my fault. If I kept my mouth shut, Briar and Kyle wouldn?t be hurt,? I thought. I couldn?t tell whose fault it was. I was too covered in grief to know.

Jessica walked over to me, and pulled me into a hug. ?Ben. I?m so sorry. This is my entire fault. If I never started telling people, Kyle never would have found out,? she apologized to me.

?Jessica. It?s not your fault. If I had held my tongue, none of them would be hurt,? I cried into her shoulder and she cried into mine.

?I think you should know Ben. I have always loved Briar. I have loved him since I first met him in preschool,? she admitted. I didn?t know what to say. ?But now that he is with you, I guess I couldn?t let it go.?

Our heartfelt moment was broken suddenly by the intercom. ?Students and staff. There has been a great tragedy on our campus today. Two students by the name of Kyle Brown and Briar Williams have been shot this morning. As of now, all we know is that one of the students have died, and the other is in critical condition,? the intercom spoke. My stomach went into knots and I began to panic. I started squeezing onto Jessica, harder and harder. The intercom continued, ?As of now, the school has dropped the lock down. Students, you are free to call your parents to come and pick you up, or you may stay here. School has been canceled for the day. Grief counselors will be available if you need one. Students and staff let us take a moment to honor these students.?

The hug of Jessica and I broke. I started to speak. ?How can we honor them? Briar gave his life for me, because I couldn?t move and because I spoke! And Kyle pulled the trigger! Why should we honor a murderer! It?s not right!? I yelled as I broke out into more tears. I ran out of the classroom and ran off to the bathrooms. I curled up in a stall, and cried myself to sleep.