I'm sorry for not updating the story before but i've had a lot of work these months, so forgive me. This one goes to Ashley, my very first fan.... Hope you like it girl.... well, here it goes....
We didn't say a word during all the way back to her home. We exchanged a few looks, slightly touched our hands but nothing more. I wanted badly to hold her hand but i didn't want to pressure her. She really needed time to think because it not only was the fear of starting a new relationship but also the perspective of living a different kind of love.
"We're home" I said nervously.
She looked at me, grab my hand and then pushed me to the dark side of wall of her building. She squeezed my hand and with her other one touched my face tenderly. Then, without previous warning, she kissed me softly on the lips.
"You taste sweet" and without saying nothing more she ran upstairs.
I was petrified. Her kiss had made me feel dizzy, i had butterflies on my stomach and my legs were trembling. I was really in love with Dani and i wanted her to kiss me again.
That night i couldn't sleep. The memories of our first kiss ran through my mind a thousand times. It was nearly 4 am when i finally got asleep and even in dreams all i could think was about her. The alarm woke me up three hours later but i fall asleep again. I finally got up at 11 am. I took a quick shower, dressed casually and headed to class not because i was really interested in what the teachers where trying to teach me but because i wanted to see her badly.
Between my first and second class, i went to the upper floor, where the second year students had their classes, to see if i could find her. I didn't see her and obviously, she hadn't come to classes that day. That scared me a lot, a hundredth reasons crossed my mind but finally i reduced them to only two: or she was ill, improbable because the day before she was fine, or she was scared to death. And when later that afternoon, i called her, the second reason was confirmed.
It was around 6 pm when i called her. After two ring tones someone picked up the phone. It was she. Her voice sounded happy and not if she was ill. I didn't say anything and i hang up. She was afraid and she didn't want to see me. All it had been a mistake, though a beautiful mistake. I didn't have enough energies to cry, so i hid inside my bed and tried to sleep, at least, for a week. I was near to fulfill my purposes when the telephone rang. The first time i didn't answered it. But it rang again, and again, and again... so at the fifth time i got up and i answered it.
"Yep?" Trying to sound relaxed
"Marta?" i immediately recognized her voice "It's me Dani" I could tell she was also nervous "Ah... Oh... Hi" i was feeling stupid and nervous again.
"Are you free tonight? I really need to see you and we have to talk" That caught my attention. Though i knew it was the typical talk about "... it all has been a mistake..", "i love you.. but only as a friend..." i really wanted to see her.
"yes...Where you want to meet?" i asked coldly
"At the bar in the corner of your residence... It's fine with you?"
"yeah, i'll meet you there in an hour" and i hang up without saying goodbye.
I had an hour to prepare myself to accept the defeat. I went to the shower and took a cold one. I closed my eyes to relax a little but the only thing i could think about it was her. I started touching myself everywhere thinking about her perfect body, my lips kissing her skin, my hands touching her everywhere.... so many things.... I lost myself that day. When i finally went out of the shower it was 7:15 pm. I had only fifteen minutes left to dress and repeat to myself "she's not yours".
Down at the street, i saw her through the cafe's glass. She was looking at her clock nervously and patting her leg intensively. I didn't want to make her wait a second more, so i crossed the street running and entered the bar.
"Hi" i said half smiling and trying to sound friendly.
She looked at me with a bittersweet smile in her face.
"Marta.... i don't know where to start.... but..." she blushed and looked directly to the floor.
"You don't have to say anything. I know It all has been a terrible mistake and that you really love me but as a friend. Maybe it's because you need someone to love you that you thought that you loved me." I said as fast as i could.
She looked at me astonished and then said "I'm sorry Marta, you're my best friend although i only know you less than a month.... but i'm not a lesbian.... i'm sorry"
"It's ok...." i said, my voice was trembling. I made the first attempt at leaving the bar but she caught my arm.
"I still want to be your friend and your tutor" she said
"And you'll still be... Let's meet tomorrow afternoon for another tuition... i need your help... you know i'm not very good at anthropology." I said trying to smile.
"Ok.... tomorrow at five pm, at the study room" she said
"That's fine. See ya tomorrow Dani" i said handling my hand to her. I wanted to kiss her badly but i didn't want to feel her skin then if i couldn't kiss her lips.