First, the disclaimer:
This is a work of fiction, and thus not a true indication of the sexuality, actions or thoughts of any member of *NSYNC. However, since I am Lance's soul mate, my fiction is probably much closer to reality than most. We'll all just have to wait and see when he decides to come out, which isn't an easy thing to do in show business. Give him time, people, time and a little understanding. And until he finally does, we'll all just continue to fantasize about him. At least it will keep us busy.
And then, some quick notes:
Thanks to Dannii for her continued support and ideas...they help more than you know, girl.
Jack, thank you for all the invaluable thoughts and advice...I can't possibly wait to hear what you have to say about the end of this one. Hehehe.
If you haven't already, get your ass in gear and read "Lance and Michael". 'Michael's Quest' under that is just amazing, and I'm waiting breathlessly for the next installment. McCall, don't keep me waiting too long!
And finally:
I love to hear all comments, criticisms, and advice. E-mail me at flyguy2240@hotmail.com
Now, on with the story...
CROSSED LINES by James An *NSYNC fantasy-of-sorts
PREVIOUSLY:
Lance walked into his room with JC on his heels. Trying to steel himself for the inevitable, he sat himself in one of the chairs by the balcony, burying his head in his hands and taking a few calming breaths. Looking up, he almost jumped when he found JC inches from him, sitting on the other chair and leaning into Lance and waiting patiently for Lance to begin.
"Okay, Jace," Lance began, knowing that, like a band-aid, it would hurt less if he just did it quickly. "You wanted to know what went down. So, the guys were in my room, talking with me, when they asked if I was going to tell them I am gay." He waited a moment, letting the information sink into JC's head. But the tall singer's eyes remained blank, so he continued.
"I freaked out on them, mostly because I wasn't quite prepared for the question, and that I thought I'd hidden my homosexuality very well. Guess I was wrong because they figured it out. But I wasn't ready to deal, so I flipped and went running, not knowing what else I was going to do. It was more a gut reaction than anything else. But they're right, and I should have told you guys a long time ago. I'm gay."
JC's eyes still held a blank look, and Lance didn't know what to think of it. Was he getting all of this? Was he upset? But when JC said nothing, Lance figured it couldn't be that bad, so he decided to go for the gusto.
"There's more, JC, and I can't keep this from you anymore. I don't think it's fair to you, and it's probably hurting our relationship in irreparable ways...God, I just have to say this. Um, Josh...Josh, look at me?"
JC still had the blank look, but he did what Lance asked and looked him in the eyes. So Lance went on.
"Josh..." Lance took JC's hand into both of his, rubbing it softly with his thumb.
"Sweet, dear Joshua Scott Chasez...I'm in love with you."
Part 4 The front of the hotel was mobbed with tons of teenage girls waiting to get autographs and pictures taken with their favorite members of *NSYNC. He took one look at the crowd, writhing and screaming various names, and turned to exit out the service door of the hotel, hoping that none of the girls had figured out where it was yet. That was always a fear: the crowd would figure out where the back door was, leaving the band with no safe way out of the hotel if needed. He strode through the door marked "Employees Only" with purpose, and no one questioned his actions. That was the way to do it--look as if you're supposed to be doing what you are. Confidence sells just about everything. Pulling his baseball cap further over his eyes, he made his way through the halls, working his way toward the back of the hotel. He really didn't have a clue as to where the service entrance was (security usually knew all that stuff, and would normally have been escorting him out of the building...if they had known he was leaving), but he walked with intention, logically trying each possibility for its placement. He finally found the kitchen, and figuring that it would have a delivery bay, walked through the stainless steel tables and racks of dishes in the opposite direction in which he had entered. Bingo--his exit. Pausing momentarily before another door marked "Employee Exit--Please Keep Door Closed At All Times" and turning his back on an entering employee so as not to be noticed, he adjusted his backpack and pretended to be reading a schedule posted by the door. When the person was past, he caught the slow- closing door and peeked outside. No one. He was safe. Taking a deep, calming breath, he walked through the door and quickly made his way toward the street, opting to leave the delivery alley as soon as possible. He grabbed his sunglasses and placed them over his eyes while he raised his other hand to flag down a passing taxi. He thanked his lucky stars that the sun was out so that his sunglasses didn't look suspicious. The crowd surrounding the front of the hotel didn't even notice as he slipped into the back seat of the cab, and he smiled to himself. He'd make it out without anyone knowing. "The airport, and I'll give you an extra fifty bucks if you can get me there in ten minutes." The cabbie turned to look at him, his look saying something like 'You can't be serious'. When he looked back at the driver without flinching, something must have clicked, and the cab was suddenly off like a rocket, pinning him back to his seat. -You're certainly going to earn that fifty, aren't you?- he thought of the driver. Then he sat back, watching the buildings and traffic flash by, and finally, he let the tears fall. * * * * * The limo drove past the front of the hotel, and Justin, Chris and Joey burrowed further into their seats, as if not to be seen. Not that being recognized was avoidable, but at least the tinted glass on the limo prevented the inevitable for a few moments longer. Justin heard the driver radio for security, letting them know of the guys' arrival, and then took a spin around the block to let Lonnie and the others work the crowd so the guys could enter the building. When the limousine finally came to a halt, the door was opened quickly and the guys darted into the hotel, trying to dodge hundreds of screaming fans and their grabbing hands. Once in the lobby, Justin turned to make sure that Chris and Joey had made it safely in. It had become habit for the guys to let Justin go first. As the youngest (and one of the cutest) members of the group, he was often a bigger target than the others, and leaving him for last was just asking for trouble, especially after the young girl filed the harassment lawsuit against him. When he was certain that his friends were safely in the building, he turned to lead them to the elevators, leaving security to prevent the mob from entering through the glass doors. It was also policy that the guys spend as little time as possible in the lobby of any hotel they were staying in. It only asked for more hassles. Justin wondered when his life had become a list of policies and rules. He'd always thought that fame would allow him to do anything he wanted. -Guess I was wrong,- he thought. The guys got into the elevator and let the doors close before speaking again. "Wonder what happened with Lance and JC," Joey almost whispered, obviously fearing the worst. "Don't know," Chris replied, staring ahead. In fact, none of the guys were looking at each other. Each seemed fascinated with the mirrored surfaces of the elevator doors. Justin sighed, knowing that they'd started a snowball and would have to deal with the avalanche that followed. He only hoped that JC and Lance would find themselves and love amongst the rubble. But it didn't change the fact that he, like the rest of the guys, was dreading what he would find once they reached their rooms. The elevator doors opened, and the guys tentatively stepped out onto their reserved floor. All the doors were shut, and not a sound could be heard. Joey exhaled the breath he had been holding, and Justin instinctively grabbed onto both his band mates' wrists, gently pulling them toward Lance's door. He wasn't quite sure what was drawing him there, because the guys could have easily been in JC's room, or any other number of places, but he felt certain that he needed to check Lance's room first. Taking a deep breath, Justin took his right hand from Chris and hesitantly brought it up to the door, knocking. There was no answer. Thinking that maybe the guys were in another room, he none-the-less tried again, just to be sure. Still nothing. The guys then, without a word, split up and began checking the other rooms on the hall. Each checked their own bedroom, but came up with nothing, as they expected. Chris and Justin waited with baited breath when Joey tried knocking on JC's door, but there was no answer there, either. Justin was beginning to get anxious. "Guys, wait here. I'm going to go check the rest of the floor, but someone should be hear in case either of them show up." "Okay," Joey responded, his voice sounding just as tight as Justin's. "I'll go check the lobby to see if anyone saw them leave." Chris pulled out his cell phone. "I'll try calling them both to see if they went anywhere. Sound check is in an hour, so maybe they've left for the stadium thinking we'd meet them there. You guys go." The guys separated, each worried sick and wondering what could have happened to their missing band mates. Justin could hear Chris begin dialing on his phone as young singer made his way down the hall, and a pit began to form in his stomach. -What the fuck happened? Did I just fuck up the band?- Justin thought, his mind racing and tears forming in his eyes. -Oh, God, help us.- * * * * * The airport was bustling, and he pulled his sweatshirt hood over his head. It might be a bit too warm, but it was better than being recognized. Somehow, luck was on his side, and he found an airline desk with no one in line. Without even caring what company it was, he walked up to the counter, laid his credit card down, and said, "One first class ticket to Orlando on the next available flight, please." The woman behind the counter looked at him strangely, no doubt because of his thrown-together disguise, but began typing into her computer terminal to find a flight. He took a moment to look at her for the first time. She was in her fifties, prim and proper with her uniform perfectly pressed and arranged and her sparkling nametag--Judith--pinned level over her left breast. He thanked God again for his luck, finding a counter with a woman who would never recognize him. He wondered if it was meant to be, for him to find it this easy to run away, but stopped himself from continuing that train of thought. It would only lead him to cry again. "Well, sir," she said, looking up from the screen. "Our next available flight leaves in two hours. Would you like to purchase a ticket?" "You don't have anything that leaves earlier?" "No, sir, I'm sorry." -Damn!- he thought. "I hate to ask this, but I'm in a terrible hurry, and I wonder if you would check the other airlines for me. I don't care if you charge me double for your effort. I just really need to get to Orlando as soon as possible." Looking at him even more strangely, but managing a smile, the woman began typing at her terminal again. "Of course, sir. If it's that important." He sighed, trying to wait patiently but unable to prevent himself from tapping his fingers of the counter. He'd never left a tour like this before, but...he stopped himself from following through with that thought. -Don't think,- he ordered himself. -Just do. You need to do this.- The woman looked up from her computer screen again. "I'm sorry, sir, but the only flight that leaves for Orlando before ours is booked solid." He almost started crying, but controlled his frustration. "You're sure that there's no way to get on that flight? I'll pay whatever it takes. The card is good for it." Judith smiled a tight smile. "No, sir, I'm sorry. There's no way to get you to Orlando on that flight." He sighed. Two hours. He could wait two hours. There was no way the guys would find him before he left anyway. "I guess I'll be buying a ticket on your next flight to Orlando then. No check-ins...just the one carry-on." "Yes, sir." Prim and proper Judith began making entries onto the computer, and then swiped his credit card. After signing the bill, he had the boarding pass in his hands, and he made his way toward the security checkpoint and the rest of the airport terminal. Suddenly, his cell phone began to ring. He'd forgotten that he even had it on him, much less turned on. Pulling it from his pocket, he looked down at the display. 'Chris,' the display read, followed by his band mate's cell number. - Damn that Kirkpatrick,- he thought, flipping the call into his voice mail and then turning it off. There was no way he wanted to talk to Chris at the moment. He just wanted to leave. Two hours, and then he'd be free. Maybe he'd find a bar for his wait. He adjusted his cap and hood, putting his sunglasses back on his face, and got in line for the metal detector. * * * * * Joey, Justin and Chris all converged in the hallway again, twenty minutes later. Without a word, each knew that they all had failed to find their friends. Justin suddenly felt weak in the knees, and before he could stop himself, he was sitting on the floor, tears streaming down his face. "We fucked up. They hate us. Damn it, how could I do this?" he whispered, his arms clutching himself as he rocked back and forth. "Fuck," he said to himself, and them repeated it over and over. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." He felt Chris' arms around him, and then let himself be picked up and led to his room. Joey followed, almost like a puppy, as Chris laid Justin down on his hotel bed and tucked him in. Softly kissing the younger singer's forehead, Chris softly whispered something in his ear and then pushed Joey out of the room before closing the door. "Let him rest," Chris told Joey when he got a questioning look from his best friend. "He'll be fine in a bit. He just needs to rest." Joey nodded understanding, and then looked into Chris' eyes again. "What now?" "I don't know," Chris answered, desperately trying to figure out a plan in his head. "But we've got to call Johnny and tell him what's happened. And we've got sound check in little over half an hour. We've got to stall that, too." Joey nodded again. "You call Johnny, and I'll take calling Melinda. She'll flip, but she'll just have to deal." Chris gave a sad chuckle. "You know, this is the sort of thing that Lance usually takes care of. Why the hell did he have to disappear on us?" Smiling at Joey, he turned and walked into his room, pulling out his cell phone to make his call to *NSYNC management as he did. Joey stood in the hall for a moment, not sure what he wanted to do next. He had to call their tour manager, but he didn't know what he was going to tell her. - Gotta think of something good,- he thought, racking his brain. -Gotta be something believable, something...something...- Out of the blue, he heard a shower start, and Joey cocked his head to discover the source of the water. Was it really coming from Lance's room? He bolted across the hall and knocked on the door, hoping for an answer. Nothing. He put his ear to the door and listened. Yes, the sounds were definitely coming from Lance's room. He pounded harder on the door, and still nothing but the hum of the shower. So he tried the doorknob, and the door opened without so much as a click. Surprised at his luck, Joey slowly pushed open the door and stepped into his friend's hotel room. He saw light spilling out from the doorway to the bathroom, which stood open, and the sound of water could be heard loud and clear. Closing the door to the room behind him, he walked to the bathroom and cautiously peeked in. There stood JC, fully clothed, under the shower. The water had soaked through the fabric of his shirt and jeans, and the dark-haired singer stood shivering in the bathtub, eyes closed and hands clenched to his chest. Instantly, Joey was pulling his friend out from under the spray, turning off the water and putting a towel around his shoulders. Without a word, he pulled the clothes off his friend, wrapped him in a complementary hotel robe, and then brought his numb band mate into his arms. JC laid his head on Joey's shoulder, saying nothing, and stood there shivering for some time. Joey simply kept his mouth shut and held his friend in a tight hug, knowing that nothing he could say would make the situation better. He'd rather wait for JC to speak anyway, hoping that whatever information the tall singer had to share would help the guys find Lance. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, JC stood tall and looked Joey in the eyes. Joey noticed that his friend's clear eyes were blank, showing no emotion at all. He wondered what JC was feeling, but he was too afraid to ask. "He's gone." Joey nodded, and rather than play dumb, skipped to the chase. "Do you know where he went?" "No." JC looked around the room, and Joey watched as his face crumbled and he began to sob. So Joey did the only thing he could think of and pulled his friend back into a hug. "He told he that he was gay and in love with me," JC bawled, his arms clutched around his friend's waist. "And I couldn't say anything. I was in shock. I didn't know what to do, or what to say. And then suddenly he threw some of his things into a backpack and walked out the door. He tells me he loves me, and then he just leaves. Oh, shit, what have I done?" He continued to cry on Joey's shoulder. "Did you see what he took with him?" Joey asked, still hoping to figure out where his friend may have gone. "I don't know. I think I saw his toothbrush and gel and stuff. And maybe he grabbed his laptop. I don't know. He's gone. How could he just leave like that, Joey? How could he leave me?" -Laptop?- Joey thought. -And toiletries. Why would he need those if he's coming bac...oh, shit, he's not coming back.- He rushed out into the hotel room, pulling a stumbling JC behind him, and looked around, seeing Lance's clothes strewn about the room. -No wonder he didn't bother packing his clothes. If he wanted out quick, he wouldn't have had time. Now, where would he go if he's not coming...- "The airport!" Joey blurted out. JC looked at him strange, but Joey ignored it and pulled him out into the hall. "Go, Jace, and get fucking dressed. If we're going to catch Lance before he flies out of this city, we've got to haul ass. I'll go get everything ready. Go!" Josh stumbled down the hall toward his room, and Joey took off in the opposite direction to get Chris, Justin and Lonnie. He began calculating times in his head and praying that Lance hadn't already flown the coup. -No, we are going to catch him. We can't let him leave!- He began pounding on Chris' door. * * * * * Somehow or other, Lance was drunk after the first four shots of tequila. Maybe it was because he had done them in less than ten minutes. Or perhaps because he hadn't eaten anything that morning. All he knew was that his head was all swimmy and mellow, and everything he looked at had a nice, soft edge to it. He felt good, and for some reason, he couldn't remember why he was leaving. He just knew that he had to. Maybe the reason would come back to him. But if it didn't, that was okay. The bartender kept looking at him funny, and Lance wasn't sure how he felt about that. What if the guy recognized him? Not that it would change everything, because simply EVERYONE knew who *NSYNC were. And just about as many people knew that he, James Lance Bass, was the bass singer for the group, as well as the gay one. Just everyone knew that. -Gay one. Hmmm. Yep, I'm the gay one.- Lance wobbled a bit on his stool and let out a single hiccup. -Oops. Gay guys can't hiccup. But JC can, 'cause he's not gay. Nope, he's a fucking straight guy. He likes pussy, the mother-fucker.- He suddenly remembered that he hated to swear, so he looked down at his hands in shame, resting them flat on the bar. Then he saw them blur even more. He felt a single tear escape and drop onto his right index finger. Was he really crying? He tried to stop himself, before he made a fool of himself and the band in public. -Not that it matters, 'cause I'm not in the band anymore. But I'm gonna do it for them this one last time.- Without warning, a loud speaker from across the concourse squealed, and then amplified a woman's voice. "This is the first call for boarding Flight 437, non-stop to Orlando, Florida. All first class passengers and coach passengers requiring assistance may begin boarding at this time. Again, Flight 437, non-stop to Orlando, is beginning boarding at this time. Thank you." Lance looked up at the clock hanging on the wall of the bar. Had two hours really passed? His mind still feeling squishy, Lance managed to force himself into standing, and then bent to pick up his bag. -Guess this is it,- he thought. - I'm going to Orlando.- * * * * * Somehow, without accident or injury, the four remaining members of *NSYNC made it to the airport. Leaving Lonnie behind to pay for the cab, Chris, Justin, Joey and JC bolted into the terminal, each looking around desperately for any sign of Lance. Nothing. No face that looked familiar, no people that Lance could have been meeting, and certainly no crowds gathered around him. "He would manage to remain disguised, wouldn't he?" Chris complained, still looking for his friend. "Damn him." Justin caught sight of the arrival/departure screens, notifying travelers and friends of their flight information. "Hey guys!" he called, pointing to the screens. "Maybe we can figure out where he's going. He's got to be leaving soon, if he hasn't already. His flight would be listed there!" The guys bolted for the monitors, just as Lonnie joined them. Not even two seconds had gone by before JC bellowed out, "Orlando! Flight 437 now boarding! He's going to Orlando!" Without waiting for the others, JC took off toward the correct concourse. "Hey, Jace! Wait up!" Justin called as he and the others tried to follow JC, but someone recognized his voice. Lonnie suddenly grabbed Justin and threw him behind the security guard's back as Joey and Chris joined him, watching as a tourist group of 30 girls were converging on them at breakneck speed. There was no way they were going to get out in the next hour, much less soon enough to keep up with JC. "I hope he catches Lance," Chris whispered, and Justin could swear that Joey said a small prayer. He himself crossed his fingers, and then plastered on a smile as the girls began screaming and begging for autographs and pictures. - Come on, Jace,- he thought. -Find Lance.- * * * * * It took Lance a lot longer than he thought it would to pick up his bag. Things got all woozy for a while, and he actually sat on the floor while he tried to regain control of his rioting stomach. But he finally felt fine, picked up his back, and was walking out of the bar as the airline's flight clerk made the final call for first class boarding. -I can't believe I let myself get drunk,- he thought, leaving the bar and crossing the concourse to the gate. -How am I going to survive this flight?- Adjusting his backpack on his back and pulling his hat lower on his head, Lance pulled his boarding pass from his pocket. Still wobbling a bit, he weaved his way through the crowd of people trying to get to the gate. And then, with no warning, Lance felt a large weight strike him, causing him to lose his balance and fall to the floor. The same weight followed him down, sprawled across him. Then lips met his, and Lance was being kissed. He struggled, pushing the person off him so he could figure out what was happening. His lack of sobriety, however, hindered his efforts, and he couldn't shove the weight of the stranger off him. He did, however, manage to break the kiss and get to look the person in the face. "JC?" Instead of answering, JC simply kissed him again, and this time Lance did not resist. -This can't be happening,- he thought. But the kiss continued, passionate and forceful, and Lance poured his heart into it. This could potentially be the only time he had the opportunity, and it simply felt to good to care about anything but the way Josh's lips felt against his. His heart welled with a mess of emotions, and then another thought crossed his mind. -JC's kissing me. Wait. Why is JC kissing me? He's straight.- Before he could do anything about his thoughts, JC pulled Lance to his feet and dragged him through the gathering crowd surrounding them. Lance wondered briefly if anyone had recognized them, but forgot to think when JC tugged him into the nearest men's room and shoved him into the handicap stall, locking the door behind him. "Sit," JC ordered, pointing at the toilet seat. Lance looked at the toilet, unsure, and then glanced up at the tall singer. JC's eyes were filled with a look that Lance had never seen before. Anger for sure, but mixed with something else, something that Lance couldn't fathom. So he obeyed and sat, not sure what else he could do. "How in the fuck could you do that to me, Scoop?" JC exploded. "How could you lay a bombshell like that and then just leave before I could even respond? How could you even think of leaving this band like this, without a word? Just up and fly away. We don't deserve this, Lance, and I know that I sure as hell deserve the opportunity to respond to your little surprise revelation. So tell me. Come on. How could you do this?" Lance sat shocked, his mouth hanging open. He'd never heard JC speak this way, especially not to him. Struggling to speak, knowing that he had to, Lance managed to say the only thing crossing his mind. "Did you kiss me?" JC's eyes flashed, and he responded without thinking. "Fuck yes, I kissed you. You think I'm going to let the love of my life leave me forever without a kiss? I don't think so." Then Josh suddenly slapped a hand over his mouth, his eyes wide with surprise. -Did I just say that? Oh my God. I just said that.- Lance looked just as astonished. "What did you say?" JC pulled his hand from his mouth, now looking incredibly sorry. "Oh, God, Lance. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say it that way. Shit, I'm sorry. I-I don't know what to say..." Lance's face lit up with a huge smile before he cut JC off. "Shut up, Chasez." He stood up, face to face with his love. "Shut up and kiss me." JC didn't have to be told twice. Arms wrapping around each other, the two singers leaned in and kissed for the third time in as many minutes. And this time, neither of them worried about anything but trying to express everything they felt for the other, express all the love and emotion through their lips. * * * * * When Lonnie finally managed to pull the guys away from the gathering of fans, they made their way through the metal detectors and down the concourse toward the gate, hoping to find JC and Lance together. But when they reached the gate, they discovered that the plane was taxiing from the gate and neither singer was to be seen. "Where are they?" Chris asked of no one in particular, and then turned to watch the plane head for the runway. None of them had an answer for him. ~~~~~~~~~~~ To be continued... So, what do you think? I want to take a moment to apologize to all of you looking for the sex scenes. They're coming...I promise...but give me a break! Lance and JC just hooked up, for Christ sake...or did they? Hehehe. Contact me at flyguy2240@hotmail.com