Oh God, Yeah I know that this is like 7 years late. Please, please, please stop sending me nasty emails, I'm beginning to get a complex. I know I'm lazy, I know I said I was going away for 10 days and would write when I got back, but I got into holiday mode and I had other stuff to do. Not only that but now you're gonna send me emails saying "We waited so long for this? It wasn't worth it!" but trust me, I have written more, I just can't post the rest of it yet cuz I'm not totally happy with it, but I'm working on fixing it up and will have it posted in the next 2 days, guaranteed! So please don't send me nasty emails, just send me nice, serene emails, I like it when people are nice to me!
THANK YOU'S:
Okay, Gotta thank Miss Leann firstly, for sending me cute pics and keeping me sane (or keeping me insane, not sure!), Linn, Ash, Derek, Rich, Erin, And everybody else who sent me nice emails. Oh, and Mickey, really sorry about the "cartoon mouse" comment, but God damn you're funny! Hee hee. Rob and Dan, it's about damn time people! Miss Dawn and Miss Leann, thankyou both for indulging my Lance story urge, I may post it soon. As always, thanks to my Mellie, and the fantastic Corey, you both rule. Thank-you to everybody who sent a response to my emails about the attacks on New York. My grasp of American geography is slight (right Linn??) and I panicked when I watched the buildings coming down, so I appreciate knowing that everybody is okay! Condolences to those who lost loved ones.
Just for the record, I'm closest in personality type to Lance, in the NSYNC personality tester thingy.
DISCLAIMER:
Don't, wouldn't, shouldn't, can't, and never intentionally would, so there! If you decide to sue over this story, I'm sorry you have nothing better to do with your day!
Now, on with the story!
Last time in Curly and Josh:
"I wasn't sleeping." Erin lied "Anyway, sit your ass down and tell me what the hell is going on."
"going on with what?" Justin replied cluelessly, as he sat on the sofa opposite the one Erin was occupying. Erin rolled her eyes in mock irritation.
"With what?" she repeated "with the Middle East Peace accord, you dork!" She laughed.
"Oh with that?" Justin acknowledged "Well I told him how I feel, and he told me how he feels."
"And?"
"And what?"
"You can be so irritating."
"I practice"
"TELL ME" she demanded in a loud whisper.
"And we've been a couple for 3 days, 6 hours and 45 minutes."
"You're kidding?"
"Nope!"
"Oh My God, Honey that's great!" She exclaimed, motioning Justin over to give her a hug because she couldn't move without the aid of crutches.
"I'm glad to see you're still wearing Garfield slippers." Erin noticed sarcastically, as she pulled away from the hug
"It shows a certain consistency of character"
"It shows that people with mental illnesses can still make it in the world." She laughed
"Hey, if I found myself in Hell I could endure the place if I had Garfield slippers"
"Hmm, Obviously JC doesn't want you for your sense of style."
"He said he loved me for my brain."
"does he know how diseased it is?"
"Jealousy's a curse you bitter wench, anyway these belong to Josh, mine are at home." He continued before sticking his tongue out.
"Then you deserve each other."
# #
Chapter 17:
JC woke alone in his bed, sweating all over. The vague memory of a nightmare played on his mind, yet he couldn't recall any details of the dream. All he knew was that it was bad and that he didn't want to remember it. Outside it was dark, with just an orange glow of light appearing on the horizon. He yawned, wanting to roll over and go back to sleep, but the lingering fear of his nightmare returning, as well as his curiosity as to Justin's where-about's forced him out of his bed against his will.
After a fruitless search for his slippers, he made the trek up the hallway of his parents home, his bare feet slapping against the highly polished timber floor. The entire house was dark and silent, save for a crack of light shining under the kitchen door. He entered the kitchen making no noise at all, and found Justin facing away from him, making breakfast and dancing and singing to a song that played quietly on the radio which sat on top of the refrigerator.
"Tiny bubbles in the wine Make me happy, make me feel fine Tiny bubbles make me warm all over With a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'Til the end of time"
Evidently the radio was tuned to Karen's favourite station, an easy-listening classic, and Justin had decided not to change it.
"So here's to the golden moon And here's to the silver sea But most of all, a toast to you and me."
JC watched as Justin bounced about the kitchen, apparently unaware of JC's presence. He was dressed in one of JC's wife-beaters and a pair of track pants, with the Garfield slippers completing the look. The song on the radio just made a comical situation hilarious and JC couldn't help but giggle to himself.
"Tiny bubbles in the wine Make me happy, make me feel fine Tiny bubbles make me warm all over With a feeling that I'm gonna love you 'Til the end of time."
The older man could no longer resist being in the same room with the man he found adorable, without touching him. He snuck up behind Justin, wrapping his arms around the younger man's waist and pulling him into a hug.
"Morning gorgeous" Justin said with a start, turning to face JC.
"Morning my baby" JC replied, kissing Justin deeply "And here's to a kiss that will not fade away." JC finished the song lyric and grinned sheepishly.
"It certainly won't" Justin replied, kissing him on the nose and smiling, before turning back to his food.
"I'm making waffles" he stated proudly "I was gonna bring 'em to you in bed, 'cause you looked so cute there, all snuggled up."
"Awww, that's nice, well we can both go back to bed if you wanna."
"I wanna!" Justin enthused.
"I'll make coffee" JC suggested, but made no attempt to let Justin go.
Suddenly someone burst through the door that connected the living room, and JC jumped back, letting go of the younger man.
"Don't stop on my account Lover boy" Erin spat grumpily, as she hobbled through the kitchen on her crutches, she headed directly for the radio which she switched off, then dragged herself back toward the living room, stopping briefly and giving Justin a wan smile.
"That's twice in one night you've woken me up, boy. I've killed for less than that, my sleep is very important to me. Most people reserve TV and radio for normal hours of the day." She turned to leave, then turned back to face JC "As you were." She smirked deviously, allowing the door to swing shut behind her.
"Uh...." JC was at a loss for words. The fear of being caught before the relationship had a chance to begin was evident in his still bleary eyes.
"Don't worry Jayce" Justin smiled, stepping toward the older man "She knows, and she's cool about it."
JC's face transformed from shock to relief and he embraced Justin, resting his head on the young man's shoulder and inhaling his familiar, soothing scent.
"I love you Jup" he reinforced.
"I love you too Josh." Justin replied, allowing himself to be held for a short moment before he spoke again."
"Um Josh."
"Yeah Baby"
"Could we continue this in a minute, or my waffles are gonna burn."
JC laughed as he let go of his lover, walking to toward the counter to make coffee. After both were finished they tidied up the kitchen, piled the waffles and coffee onto a tray, and carried it back to the bedroom. JC climbed back into bed and took the tray from Justin so that he too could get in. As he looked at the tray he noticed that Justin had put all of the waffles on one plate. The fact that Justin already thought of them as a couple able to share a meal was a small gesture, but it was symbolic enough to make JC's heart swell with adoration. He set the tray on the side table, then he dragged Justin on top of him and kissed him passionately, before rolling both of them over, so he was perched on top of the younger man, with a knee either side of his chest. He reached across the bed for the plate and began to tenderly feed the boy his breakfast, licking the spilled honey from around his mouth once he was done.
# # #
After finishing breakfast both men had gone back to sleep wrapped in each others arms. Justin woke with a start some time later, it was now light and the morning sun was streaming through the gaps in the drapes. He realised with concern why he had woken up. JC, who had been hugging him tightly when they had gone to sleep, was now thrashing around on the opposite side of the bed, apparently in the throes of a particularly terrifying nightmare.
Justin gently took hold of his boyfriend's arms and held them to the bed, softly shaking the older man and calling his name.
"Jayce, wake up babe." He soothed "It's okay, it's just a dream."
JC slowly calmed down and woke up groggily, his eyes wide in terror. When he looked at his lover he didn't, as Justin had expected, relax at all. Instead he appeared to recoil in horror.
"Baby it's me." Justin called, fear rising in his voice. "What's the matter?"
"Uh....nothing." JC replied vacantly, calming down just marginally, but enough for Justin to pull him into a tight cuddle.
"Jesus you scared the hell out of me, Josh." Justin whispered "What was the dream about?"
"Sorry Jup, I didn't mean to scare you." JC responded "I don't really remember anything" He lied.
"It's probably the stress of the past few weeks" Justin surmised "Maybe you should see someone about it"
"Like therapy?" JC asked, surprised "Nah, I'll be fine, I just need a break." He continued, relaxing more and falling into his boyfriends' embrace.
"Maybe we should go away for a few days after all this media rubbish is done with, we have a couple of weeks before we go back on the road."
"Good idea, maybe Lance would let us use the place he has by the beach." JC suggested, trying to sound enthusiastic despite the memory of his dream still fresh in his mind. The dream had scared him more than he would let Justin know.
****In his dream their relationship had been going so well that they had decided to come out to the rest of the group to make it less secretive and easier. They had gathered the other 3 members together in a non- descript hotel room, in an unidentifiable tour location and they had both nervously broken the news of their relationship and proclaimed their love for each other. Lance had been the first to speak, and even in his dream JC could tell Lance was angry because he swore.
"What is this shit? Some kind of sick joke?" Lance asked
Immediately Justin had jumped to the defence of their relationship, but Chris interrupted him.
"This has to be your doing JC, you've poisoned his mind, he's only young and you've influenced him with these sick ideas of love and devotion, he's just a kid you sick freak!"
Lance cancelled the rest of the tour and Joey had called Justin's parents "Sorry Jayce, but they're right, this is sick Dude, we're supposed to look after him while he's away from his family and they would not approve of this.....this.....whatever this is. They need to be here."
Justin's Mother and Father had also blamed JC "Justin is a Christian" Lynn stated adamantly "He can't be one of THOSE!"
"Mum, I'm gay, and I'm in love with JC. If you can't handle that and accept us for who we are then I don't see any point continuing this conversation. If you don't want me as part of your life, as I am, then that's your decision."
"I've heard enough of this" Randall said "Once this rebellious phase is over with, and you feel like being part of the family again then give me a call Justin, until then I don't want to speak to you."
After Justin's parents had walked away, the group had decided to disband, and Justin and JC had moved on with their combined life. But as JC's dream had progressed, their relationship had begun falling apart and Justin began to blame JC for ruining his career, his life and his relationship with his family.
JC knew his dream was far-fetched and that there was no chance that Justin would ever blame him for the decisions they had made together. The one thing that scared JC more than anything was the fact that things could go differently to they way he had imagined them. Things might go wrong and they might break-up, or people might not accept their relationship and Justin might decide that the relationship wasn't what he wanted anymore. A million different scenarios played on his mind and even though Justin had entered the relationship willingly JC wasn't sure he had fully considered all the pitfalls of such a decision. He wanted to discuss it with the younger man but he knew Justin would reassure him that everything was okay, even if it wasn't. He decided to play along with the relationship and hope his fears weren't realised, he also hoped that Justin didn't notice his insecurity.********
Justin had, however, noticed JC's strange behaviour when he woke from his nightmare. He had been disappointed and more than a little bit hurt when JC appeared to be scared of him. He had envisaged being JC's knight in shining armour when he needed it, but he hid his feelings to avoid a discussion that JC obviously didn't want to have.
# # # # #
The hotel room was enormous, almost as though it had been designed for the express purpose of being populated by hoards of arrogant, pushy journalists. Justin and JC had spent the past 3 days completing television interviews for numerous stations, hosts and programs, and as the days wore on in their week-long press junket organised by the record company, JC appeared to be wearing down and becoming more withdrawn. As JC's health deteriorated Justin's worry for his boyfriend increased exponentially. His worry soon translated as anger at their managers for organising interviews after allowing them only one day to recuperate, but his rage was easily misdirected toward journalists. They had been sitting in the large dining room of the hotel suite, which had been converted into a make-shift interview room, for 3 solid hours and reporters were ushered in one at a time to collect their pound of flesh, then left content that they had sufficiently invaded privacies they had no right to. Throughout the last interview JC had stared wistfully out of the window. After the reporter left the room Justin looked over toward the older man, who sat in a Chesterfield tub chair identical to the one Justin himself rested in, separated by a coffee table.
"Jayce, are you alright babe?" Justin asked, concerned.
"JC slowly turned from the window as if he had only just become aware of his surroundings, and Justin noticed for the first time that heavy bags had formed under his blue eyes.
"I'd rather if we could do the interview in the park" JC replied, forlornly, pointing toward the park opposite the hotel "I'd like to take a nap on the grass."
"I know you would Jayce." Justin said sympathetically, quickly reaching across and risking giving the older mans leg a squeeze. "But you know security would go mental. Do you wanna cancel for today?"
"No way" JC replied, stifling a yawn "That will just prolong this crap for another day. I just wanna get it over with so we can go away somewhere together."
"Me too" Justin replied, smiling broadly.
JC wasn't sure if he really wanted to go away somewhere with Justin. As much as he loved the boy, his nightmare had returned the last 3 nights and he couldn't forget the image of Justin telling him that he had ruined his life. The last thing he wanted to do was ruin Justin's life, but he knew his boyfriend was looking forward to taking a trip and he was willing to do whatever it took to make Justin happy.
"I hope I can shake this cold or whatever it is." JC stated "I feel like crap."
"You look pretty damn fine!" Justin replied suggestively.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
Their conversation was cut short by a fat, middle-aged woman who had stepped into the room. Her hair had turned prematurely grey and the top was styled into a tight, outdated perm, while the back had been allowed to grow into long grey 'tails'. Justin was thinking that this woman with the cheap outfit and audacious hair-style had come to tell them that lunch was ready, or something similar, but as she came closer she plopped down into the chair which faced them.
"Cheryl Jones, Juice magazine." She introduced abruptly. Both boys groaned simultaneously.
"So" Cheryl began speaking quickly "When you were on the island what did you eat, where did you sleep, how did you survive, how did you stop yourselves going insane."
Justin rolled his eyes and looked toward JC, who stared longingly at the park.
"Well Cheryl" Justin began "In answer to your questions, uh, 1) Small children, 2) In the Sheraton hotel at the back of the island, it was only 4 star so it had no cable TV 3) smoked the local flora 4) Consulted the in- house psychotherapist. How's that for a controversial article?"
JC, who was now shaken from his day-dream, looked worriedly from Justin to the poorly permed Cheryl, wondering if she had picked-up on the vicious sarcasm in Justin's voice. After a couple of seconds it became apparent that she was oblivious to Justin's actual intent as she burst into a fit of raucous laughter.
"Oh, that would make a killer article." Cheryl laughed "I can see the headlines now 'NSYNC fans sacrifice their lives so band members can live' that's funny."
JC took a deep breath and, once again, zoned-out.
# # #
Justin and JC returned to the suite they were sharing while they were in New York for the interviews. They had made it through the week of questioning and JC now looked worse than ever.
"You okay babe?" Justin asked for the millionth time that week, as JC flopped down on the gigantic bed.
"Tired" JC replied wearily "Need to sleep" he motioned for Justin to lay down with him, and the younger man lay in front of him spooning, while JC wrapped his arms around his muscular body, making contented growling noises before drifting off to sleep. Although the older man had been coming down with an illness of some kind that was not the only source of his exhaustion. Every waking minute was now spent worrying about his relationship with his best friend and every time he tried to sleep he was haunted with the recurring nightmare of their break-up. He knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with the beautiful teen, but he didn't want to risk ruining the rest of Justin's life due to his own selfishness. Justin had noticed JC's indecision, but had assumed that it's basis lay in the fact that JC was having second thoughts about the relationship. Now that he had JC, he didn't want to lose him, but keeping him may mean causing resentment. It was this problem that kept Justin awake long after JC's rhythmic breathing against his bare skin had caused a shiver of excitement up the younger mans' spine.
# #
More to come soon, I promise. So what did you think? Send me feedback to the usual address, but please break it to me gently if you hated the chapter, I get offended easily.......yeah right! LOL. Love and Stuff, AKW.