Decisions

By moc.liamtoh@yeliabinnaD

Published on Jul 6, 2000

Gay

Disclaimer: This story contains homosexual themes. If you are under the age of 18 or if reading this story is illegal to read where you are residing, please read no further. While the people in this story are real, the events are purely fictional. This is not meant to imply anything about the sexuality of the people portrayed in this story.

If you have any feedback, either positive or negative, you may contact me at Dannibailey@hotmail.com

Notes from the author:

First of all I just want to say thank you for all the comments I have received. It's great to hear from the readers. A special thanks goes out to Aphrodite and Hawkmann (both A & J) for their support.

Evidently I need to clear something up...My abbreviations are not as widesperead as I thought. Let me explain "143". I've used it since I was a kid. There is 1 letter in the word "I", 4 letters in the word "love" and 3 letter in the word "you". So......143 means I Love You. Sorry for the confusion.

The big news is that Scorsagian has agreed to create a website for the story and it should be up and running soon. The plan is to show pictures of the characters (yes, you finally get to see Gary and Danni) and other items that would, we think would be fun to see and not just read about. It will also allow you to hear the songs that are featured in the story, not only from NYSNC but other artists as well, so stayed tuned.

-Danni Dannibailey@hotmail.com

I wanted to let you know I delayed the release of this chapter by a day so I could include the url to the site. You can find the site at the following URL http://aseaofdecisions.cjb.net/

Right now all you will find at that url is the front page for the site. More is to come soon. But the theme of the site will be based on the front page.

I also want to make a note that the images used in creating the site are just that images. We do not intend to imply anything about these people. This story is fictional and so everything that will be on display at the site is based in fiction.

If you have any questions about the pending site or if you have any ideas that you think would be good for the site drop either danni or myself an email.

-ScorSagian ScorSagian2k@hotmail.com

"Decisions"

by DB

Chapter 9

You spent most of the night tossing and turning, partly because you were worried about Justin, and partly because you knew what the morning would be like. You and Justin had to talk. There was no getting around it. Finally, at 8:00 A.M. you gave up on getting any real sleep and turned on the light on the night stand and once again tried to make sense of the manuals Johnny had given you the night before. It was pointless. Justin was the only thing on your mind, and after 30 futile minutes you decided to shower, hoping it would refresh you and clear the cobwebs that cluttered your mind.

As you were drying off, you heard Justin stirring in the other room. Wrapped only in a towel you sat next to him on the bed and ran your fingers through his curls. He could barely open his eyes, and his face reflected the pain that his head was inflicting on his body.

"Let me guess," you asked softly, "you're not feeling so hot?"

Justin put both of his hands to his head as if some how holding his head would relieve the pain.

"I feel like shit!" "What the hell happened?"

You crawled into bed next to him and pulled him close so he could rest his head on your chest. You gently massaged his temples, hoping to ease the discomfort at least somewhat.

"Well, how much do you remember?" you asked.

Secretly, you hoped he wouldn't remember much of the fight. You had let your anger get in the way of common sense. Yelling at Justin last night accomplished nothing and you regretted doing it.

Obviously, whatever memory he had of last night, he was having a hard time recalling.

"I remember being in the club and some girls wanting me to do shots with them." "I really didn't want to, but they kept bugging me so I just did them and got it over with." "I don't even like tequila."

He lifted his head slowly from your chest and stared into the deep green eyes that he had come to love. "I guess that was my first mistake, huh?"

You kissed his forehead gently and he laid his head gingerly back on your chest.

"Well," you said sympathetically, "it was your first of many."

Suddenly, Justin was sobbing uncontrollably in your arms. You held him tightly and whispered softly, trying to console him.

"Justin, it's Ok." "Just talk to me." "What's wrong?"

After several attempts you finally calmed him down enough to speak. Tears were streaming down his face.

"You're gonna leave me aren't you?"

You couldn't believe what you had just heard. You rolled him on his back and kissed the tears from his cheeks.

"Justin, I love you with all my heart and soul." "Why would you think something like that?"

He was having a difficult time getting enough composure to answer you.

"Because it always happens!" "Every man I have ever loved has turned on me and now you're next!" You could see the fear in his eyes. "My dad, the guy in Germany, even Lou!" "I fucked up again and now I'm gonna loose you too."

You felt a pain in your heart.

"Justin, I'm not going anywhere, not now, not ever." "You have touched my soul like no one else ever will." "I love you!" "You can't judge me by what others have done."

His tears continued, but you could see the relief in his eyes.

"Gary, I thought it was all over." "I know I let you down last night."

You kissed him tenderly. "You did Justin, and I was very angry, but this isn't a fairy tale, its real life." "We'll both make mistakes, but we'll learn from them." "We'll move forward and our love will grow stronger."

"So we can work this out?" he asked cautiously.

"Of course we can." "Do you know why I was so angry last night?"

"Yes," he said sheepishly, "I promised you I wouldn't be drinking and I did."

"That's part of it," you replied, "but it's really not about the drinking." "You and I have drank before and I'm sure every now and then a cold beer after a concert really hits the spot." "But that's in private and in a safe environment." "Last night you got drunk in club and drove home." "Not only did you endanger your own life, but what about everybody else on the road?" "You scared the hell out of me, especially after we left Chris' room" "You have no idea what it was like last night when you were so sick."

His head hung low. "I'm sorry, Gary." "I just wasn't thinking." "Can you forgive me?"

You kissed his trembling lips and he moaned softly at your touch.

"I already have" you whispered.

His lips opened, his mouth yearning for you. You slid your tongue deep inside, and you could feel his body becoming hot with desire. Justin's hands caressed every inch of your body stopping where they could best work their magic. His mere touch excited you, but his gently stroking brought you pleasure like you had never known. Soon you felt you body edging closer to a climax and entered Justin's young body so that he too could enjoy the passion you were feeling. Your bodies pressed close together along with the rhythm of your lovemaking brought Justin to an orgasm as he desperately tired to suppress his loud moans. Hearing Justin excited you even more and you joined him in ecstasy, oblivious to anything but your lover and his sensual touch. You lay in each other others for several minutes; your bodies drained of all energy and you minds unable to comprehend the depth of your love.

As you lay peacefully in your lovers arms you realized Chris would be expecting you to join him and the rest of the guys for one last breakfast. Today the guys had a final interview, and tonight you would load on the bus and head to Orlando for some "down time" before the NSA tour started. "Down time" was actually incorrect. For the members on *NSYNC and those associated with the tour there was no real time off. Even when the guys weren't touring, they worked incessantly to keep their careers headed in the right direction. Your week-end with Justin in the Bahamas was the only two consecutive days off he'd had since you met him. At least in Orlando the pace would slow somewhat and the guys could have the majority of the evenings to themselves. You knew this morning everyone would be discussing their plans for Orlando, and it was a topic you could do without. You had spent every night during the last three months with Justin in your arms. Being in Orlando would change that. Justin would be expected to stay with his mom and you knew he was unprepared to share with her just how serious your relationship had become.

"Hey J," you whispered softly, we gotta get up." "Breakfast is in a half and hour and I'd say a shower is definitely in order."

He moaned something unintelligible and sat up cautiously. "Gary, I don't know about breakfast." "I don't think I can keep anything down."

You moved closer, gave him a hug and smiled. "Maybe just some toast, but you got to put something in your stomach." "Come on, let's see if a shower helps."

You showered leisurely, with Justin spending most of the time leaning against your chest. You helped him dress and headed to Chris' room. Quite miraculously, you were the first to arrive, but unfortunately Chris had not cooled down from the night before. He was sitting on the balcony when Danni let you and Justin in.

"Justin, get you ass out here now!" "I need to talk to you!"

Justin looked at you hoping you would intervene, but Chris would have not part of it.

"Don't even think about it Justin, Gary is not bailing you out of this one!"

His comment angered you. "I have no intention of bailing him out." "I just don't think now is a good time."

You had never seen Chris so angry. "I don't give a fuck what you think right now Gary, I'm talking to him!"

Danni looked at Justin and could see that Chris was more than he could handle right then.

"Gary, let Justin lie down and order him something light to eat." "Let me handle Chris."

She turned and joined Chris on the balcony, slamming the sliding glass door behind her. "Ok Chris, what the hell is wrong with you?" "Can't you see how bad he feels?"

Chris was not backing down. "Danni, his pain is self inflicted." "I don't feel sorry for him one bit!" "That stunt he pulled last night was stupid." "He deserves to get his ass chewed!"

"And, you don't think Gary can handle that?" she yelled.

"I think you and Gary baby him, and I'm sick of it!" Chris argued.

"Dammit Chris, he's only 19." "He's spent the last 3 years on the road with you guys." "He's basically been on his own since he was 16." "Doesn't he deserve it?" "He's NEVER been a problem, and the one time he screws up you jump all over him!" "Think about it Chris, what were you like at his age?"

Her last comment hit home and a slight smile came across his face. ""I was a hell of a lot worse than him." He leaned over and kissed her. "Thanks"

As Chris and Danni had their discussion, Justin curled up on the bed and you ordered breakfast. Within minutes, the rest of the guys invaded Chris' room; first Lance & JC and then Joey who immediately jumped on the bed and started tickling Justin.

"Quit, Joey" Justin screamed. "My head is killing me." "Doesn't your head hurt?"

"No way," Joey chuckled, "I feel great!"

Justin was stunned. "I don't get it." "I know you had more to drink than I did."

A devilish grin encompassed Joey's face. "J, you just need to take some lessons from a pro!" "You just thought I drank more than you." "Whenever I go out the first thing I do is tip the bartender $20.00." "I let him know that the first three drinks are mixed normal." After that, no alcohol."

"Bullshit," exclaimed Justin, "You were doing shots." "I saw you."

Joey laughed. "Justin, you are such a rookie," "Why do you think I do shots of Vodka?" "It's clear, kinda like water." "Get it?"

Justin shook his head in disbelief. "You could have shared that with me Joey!"

"No way!" Joey replied. "How long to you think it took me to figure out Chris was doing it?"

Chris and Danni returned from the balcony walking hand in hand. "Hey I'm starving," Chris announced, "did you guys order already?"

"Yep," JC informed him, "we ordered you the usual." "Is that Ok?"

"You bet, how long before its here?" Chris asked.

"About 10 minutes" Lance let him know.

"Good" Chris said. He walked over to Justin and took his hand, helping him to stand. "Come on, let's talk." He put his arm around Justin's shoulder and ushered him out to the balcony. Justin sat uncomfortably in a patio chair and Chris knelt in front of him resting his hands on Justin's knees. From what you could tell, it was a one sided conversation, with Chris doing the talking and Justin nodding and occasionally using the back of his hand to remove a tear from his cheek.

Sensing your concern, Danni sat next to you, slipped her hand into your's and gave it a slight squeeze.

"He'll be fine with Chris, but you've got bigger problems," she said quietly as motioned towards the door.

Johnny eyes focused on the scene on the balcony. "What the hell's wrong with Justin," he asked immediately.

The room was silent. Dam,' you thought, this day is going down hill fast.'

"Johnny can I talk to you in the hall for a minute?" you asked. Johnny said nothing, but held the door open and motioned toward the hall.

You could tell from his voice that Johnny was frustrated. "Gary, what the hell is going on out there and what's up with Justin?"

"Look Johnny," you explained "Justin went out last night and had a little too much to drink, and before you say anything, I just want to ask you to let me handle it." "I know you're mad and so is Chris, but just trust me on this one."

Johnny was having a hard time controlling how he really felt. "Ok Gary, I'm gonna let you handle it this time, but let me make something VERY clear to you." "I will not put up with the any of this crap on the next tour." "Do you understand me?"

"Yes, sir" you said respectfully.

Then Johnny added, "and you better make damn sure Justin understands it too!" The hotel staff delivering breakfast interrupted your conversation, and you were thankful for their timing. As you and Johnny joined the rest of the group you could see that things had returned to normal. Danni was sitting in Chris' lap listening to him and JC discussing the upcoming tour, Joey was listening to his Walkman and Lance and Justin were deeply involved in a video game. You sat down behind Justin and kissed his neck, tickling him and breaking his concentration.

"Hey, hold on!" he said as he pulled away, "I'm just about to kick Lance's butt."

"Yeah, right rabbit!" Lance argued. Lance quickly moved the control and the game was over. "Gotcha!"

Justin hated to loose at anything and rarely did. "Best two out of three", he begged, "and what's up with the "rabbit" comment?"

Evidently the rest of the guys knew just what Lance was talking about because they were roaring with laughter.

"I just fits you man," Lance explained.

Justin was clueless. "I don't get it?" "What am I missing?"

JC tried to refrain himself from laughing long enough to clear things up for Justin. "Justin, its just that every time Gary comes with in five feet of you, you get a hard on." That's why you lost the video game." "You're like the damn energizer bunny!" "Doesn't that thing ever rest?"

Justin covered his face with his hand and blushed with embarrassment. "I can't help it" "I guess I'm just in love."

"No, you're just horny 24/7." That's your problem!" Chris added.

It was Danni to the rescue, as usual. "Ok you guys, enough." "I thought you were hungry?"

"How about you concentrate on eating and not Justin's love life."

The guys devoured that breakfast and even Justin managed to finish his toast and juice.

They left for the radio interview at about one and although Justin had wanted you to go with him, you had opted to stay at the hotel and finish packing. A strange feeling came over you as you realized that by tomorrow at this time you would be in Orlando and tonight on the bus would be the last night for quite some time that Justin would fall asleep in your arms. Sleep tonight would not come easy.

A knock at the door interrupted your work. You opened the door to see Justin's bright blue eyes and sparkling smile. In his hand were two long stemmed red roses.

"I forgot me key" he said apologetically and then added, "These are for you." "One to say I'm sorry and one to say I love you."

Who could possibly resist his charm. "I love you too, thank you!"

Justin kissed you tenderly. "I guess you still want to talk about last night huh?"

"Yes I do, and I rather discuss it before we get on the bus." "Justin you scared me last night. Not just because of how sick you were, but because of the decisions you made."

Justin looked remorseful. "I know what I did was really, really stupid." "Don't worry, there won't be a repeat performance."

You were relieved. "That's good. Johnny made it very clear this morning that he didn't want to see any of that on the next tour."

"Johnny knows?" Justin asked.

"Yes, he saw you and Chris on the balcony and wanted an explanation" you told him.

Justin sounded dejected. "So when is his lecture?"

You smiled slightly. "There won't be one." "I told him I'd handle it, so consider yourself lectured, but if you ever try anything like that again, I'm feeding you to the wolves." "Your butt will belong to Chris and Johnny!"

"Don't worry, I've learned my lesson." He pushed you back on the bed. "Speaking of lessons, I could use another one in love making." How about it?"

You pushed him off laughing. "How about NO, rabbit." "The bus leaves in fifteen minutes."

He tried his best to look pitiful, but agreed and started to gather up his bags.

The mood on the bus was somber. While everyone was excited about having some free time, you all realized that you would miss the day to day camaraderie you shared with each other.

You and Justin turned in early hoping to spend some quite time together before going to sleep. Justin snuggled close to you and wrapped his arm around your waist.

"Gary, I called my mom today." "She's gonna meet us for lunch when we get to Orlando." "I want her to meet you."

"That's great." "I want to meet her too." "I'd like to meet who is responsible for the charming personality of Mr. Justin Timberlake."

He blushed. "That's mom alright." "We're really close." "That's why I'm kinda nervous."

His comment confused you. "Nervous about what, Justin?"

He sat up and stared directly into your eyes. "I'm not gonna have the man I love stay anywhere but with me." "I'm telling my mom about us."

You had not expected this and his announcement left you wondering how to respond.

"Justin, I'm not sure of what to say."

He leaned close to you and whispered. "You don't have to say anything, but I need you to be there with me when I tell her." "It's gonna be hard."

You were concerned. "Justin, I will back whatever decision you make 100 %, but are you sure this is what you want to do?"

His voice was filled with sincerity. "Yes, I'm sure." "I'm just scared." "I love her so much and don't want to hurt her, but I also know how much I love you." "I want her to be happy for me."

"Justin, does she have any idea you're gay?" you asked.

Justin half laughed. "No way!" "She thinks Britney and I have something going on."

"Just be prepared, Justin," you reminded him, "don't expect her to welcome me with open arms." "It's not gonna happen."

A tear came to his eye. "I know Gary, but I have to tell her." He paused briefly and then added, "Can we just go to sleep now." "I'm really tired and I don't want to talk about this any more."

"Sure, no problem" you said with a smile. He turned over and you pulled him close to you and kissed his soft curls. You hit the play button on the CD player and the sound of Justin's voice surrounded you. Within minutes you both were asleep.

Will Be Continued...

Next: Chapter 6


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