Desolation

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I wish to thank Miguel Sanchez and Clark for their work editing and improving this story.

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I am behind posting 'Short Grass Prairie' but will catch up soon.

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DESOLATION

CHAPTERS FIFTY-ONE TO FIFTY-EIGHT

by Phil Ford

CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE

Jason Wilson was in a mess. He had worked for the same company for eight years, going from job superintendent of one construction site to another like clockwork. He ended up doing it with a BA in business because he'd done construction over the summers to pay his tuition and with that experience, it beat managing a McDonalds. He was laid off. It was a polite way of being fired. They were hiring and he was laid off. His last job had lost money because the asshole who bid the job fucked up and bid below cost, but Jason got the ax. Unemployment wouldn't pay his rent, wouldn't pay his truck payment, he was fucked. He'd gotten too comfortable, trusting his job would always be there and now, it wasn't. He had no savings, nothing.

At least being gay, he didn't have a wife and a bunch of brats to worry about, but in the back of his mind he thought maybe being gay had something to do with him loosing the job. "Nah" he thought "at six three and straight acting, there's no way in hell anyone knows I'm gay." He gone to a bar last night after the big kiss off and gotten royally soused. He woke up next to some guy of whom he had no idea what his name was or any memory of meeting him. There was a pack of condoms on his nightstand and six used ones in the trash can beside the bed. He looked down and said to himself, "I hope you had fun and it holds you a long time, because it looks like it'll be a while before you get any fun again." He was definitely hung over.

The phone rang. It was the architect from his last job. He had a job offer and the guy didn't know he'd been laid off either. He was to be at Meacham Field in Fort Worth at one and would be brought back tomorrow, bring a suitcase. It was nine thirty. He took some pills to kill the hang over and started packing a bag.

The plane started making it's descent in what Jason would describe as bum fuck Egypt. There weren't really even any trees he would call trees, just a bunch of damn wind mills all around and the house and buildings of a ranch. He got off the jet and a bunch of cowboys, chaps and all were lined up military style, except more with poses sort of, and one tipped his hat and took his suitcase, the jet turned around and took off again, and he stood there. Another guy walked up and extended his hand saying "I'm Bob Esterhazy, Jason, can you walk with me a minute and then I'll introduce you to everyone?"

Bob gave him a handful of oats and said "This is Blondie, the head of our human resources department, give her a nibble and she if she likes you." He reached out and Bob corrected him demonstrating how to hold his palm flat and she'd nibble the oats from his hand. "You pass," Bob said.

The guys were all hastily introduced down the line, Jason thinking they looked hot, actually, with the draw strings on the chaps pulled tight to show off the bulge in their jeans. He missed most of the names, but caught three; Tim, Dan, and Lance, who piled in a truck with himself and Bob and were down the road before he knew what happened. They went to the laborers center, then the community center and past some houses under construction and turned back toward the ranch. Down some dirt roads, past fields, more windmills, more cows, a creek, lots of beehives, and other things flew past as they returned back to the ranch. "We're building a winery over there" Bob pointed. Another set of roads wound around the ranch and they arrived at a house. It went so fast Jason knew he must still be hung over.

A drink was shoved in his hand, Weller straight up, his favorite. Supper would be ready in a little while, he was told. In an office, Bob handed him what seemed to be a book that he thumbed through listing nearly everything about his life down to how many times a day he took a piss and the fact he was gay, things only personal friends or those there at the given time might know. He was pissed off. "If there are any inaccuracies we can straighten those out later" Bob said.

"I'm never thorough like this myself. I prefer to do business with a handshake, but my lawyers found you, and my architectural firm and engineers. Apparently I own thirty percent of the company that laid you off and if you're not interested in working for me, I can try to get you hired back, but it might be short lived. I'm selling my share next week, mostly because they fired you and the buyer owns another twenty five percent. I'm assured he'll screw them and nail them to the wall just before he sells all the assets and their opinion of me won't be worth a shit." Then Bob showed him what he was offering.

Jason's first impression was pretty bad. He wanted to tell Bob to go fuck himself. This was a terrible place to live, but the money was well more than double what he'd made. If he said no, he'd be homeless in two weeks and his truck would be repossessed in a month. He said "Let me think about it a little bit."

Supper was finer than he had ever eaten in the best restaurant he'd been in. It was a crown roast with either a fancy sauce or barbeque sauce. He liked barbeque. It had all the trimmings. Five different wines were served. Some damn banana dish, on fire, was desert. Bananas Foster or something. There were more drinks afterward. He got the whole show, guitars, karaoke, and ending up naked in the whirlpool with a bunch of really hot men.

At bedtime, Lance led him back saying "This is my room, but I'm bunking with the guys so you have your own room."

"I'll share, I'm afraid of the dark" Jason said to Lance with a wicked grin.

Jason reached for his pants after he woke but was stopped by Lance with the words "we don't dress for breakfast" and grabbed by the hand, he was led to the kitchen. It was six and he didn't feel tired, so they must have gone to bed at a decent time; he didn't have a hang over either.

Tim was cooking sausage patties and Scotty handed him a cup of coffee, pointing to the sugar bowl and cream pitcher- real cream. He shook his head in the negative manner and took a sip. "Good morning guys" he said.

The morning news was on in the kitchen. Bob was at the computer. He wasn't bombarded with questions. Only about half the guys were in the house. He hadn't realized the missing men lived in bunkhouse yet. Guys left, came back dressed and went out the door a couple at a time until Bob, Clavo, and Lance were all that remained. Bob came back dressed and Jason took the hint. He was joined by Lance and returned after a few minutes. He sensed this was the transition between home and work.

"Have you come to any decision yet?" Bob asked.

"I think I need a day or two here, to make up my mind, can the plane come back tomorrow or the next day?"

"Sure, take your time. I have work to get done myself, but Lance is free and Clavo can spend some time with you. A lot of what the job entails is being done by Clavo, but as the priest it has become more than he's able to handle." Bob felt he was forgetting something "we pretty much hit you with all we've got yesterday, after that, today will be laid back. If you decide to take the job, we can have your apartment packed and everything moved here for you, even your truck, or you can take as much time as you need to get it done yourself."

Jason thought about the last part. Moving was always a bitch and this ranch had to be a six hour boring drive he wouldn't really want to make. "To be honest, Bob, I don't really have much choice. I have to accept your offer. I'd be homeless in a heartbeat and have my truck repossessed before the month was out. Unemployment doesn't give me enough to pay my bills and I've lived paycheck to paycheck."

"You were at the top of my list when that prick fired you. He saw you in a gay bar. He goes there a lot himself. When I got the word, I figured fate had intervened." Bob was taking his statement for a 'yes'. "I'll see you later and we can talk some more."

Lance and Clavo were still pretty quiet. "Can you show me where I'm living now, on the map?" Jason said that with finality. Clavo pulled up a map on the computer, showed him their position relative to the interstate highways and pointed out that Midland and Odessa were the closet major cities. "I was right. This is bum fuck Egypt." Clavo did respond to that saying the jet could take him wherever he wanted when he needed a break from the ranch. It was Bob's jet. "So you're a priest, huh? Well bless me father for I have sinned and don't plan on stopping. The only thing I do wrong is break a heart occasionally."

"So, you're Catholic?" Clavo asked.

"More Catholic than Catholics, I'm Episcopal," Jason came back. "What about my damn keys to get my things and my truck?"

"That can be taken care of," Clavo answered.

"The furniture is rental or belongs to the complex, it's just my personal stuff and electronics there, not even much in the kitchen. I eat out a lot." Jason thought a little more. "Fuck what a wasted life, I don't even have anyone to say goodbye to, just social acquaintances who won't even notice I'm gone and I only see mom once or twice a year. Be patient with me. This is going to be a rough adjustment."

Clavo made all the necessary calls and Jason's possessions would arrive the day after tomorrow. He carried an envelope from the office when he came back into the kitchen and handed it to Jason. "This is a check for you to open an account and your truck title. Bob paid off the note and it came with you on the plane yesterday." It was early for a drink, but Jason poured himself an ample glass full and turned it up until the glass was drained.

Jason wanted to just hang out for the morning. Lance would keep him company and as Clavo was leaving, he pulled Jason to the side and said "If you leave, keep an eye on Lance. Some bad things have happened and we don't let him out without a guard dog. You're elected for today. Woof!"

Jason turned his attention to Lance when Clavo had gone. "What exactly do you do around here cowboy?" he asked.

"I'm a horse trainer but all the horses are trained already so I'm using them to teach Johnny and Gary how to train horses until Bob buys some more horses. I'm kind of a bump on a log at the moment, but I just came to work for Bob a short while back, I've been teaching the guys for months though."

Jason felt an urge for a riding lesson like he'd had the night before, from Lance, but gave him a peck on the cheek and stifled his brashness. "I'm all yours then, show me whatever you want; I'm the newby to this ranch now."

Lance thought a closer look at everything going on in Desolation would be the best way to start the day. He drove Jason to the bank first, to get his account set up, and briefly introduced Laura. At the community center the ladies groups were having coffee with Clavo and in their full onslaught of confusion Clavo let them loose on Jason, explaining he was now the person in charge of the foundation and charities, with Clavo only in the role of observer. Jason got a pad and at least went through the motions, writing down what each woman wanted done. He wiped his face a few times and beads of sweat on his forehead gave a hint at his frustration. When the ladies had satisfied themselves, they departed leaving the three men alone. "Just hang on to that list right now," Clavo said. "Bob and the lawyers will fill you in on what to do about it later."

Where the houses were under construction, Jason was in a more familiar environment. He met some of the volunteers and laborers working on the project. He had coordinated his company's crews with habitat for humanity doing work in the past. He was accustomed to training people, too.

At the Laborers center he met Bill Miller at the door. Some of the women he had seen earlier were at work in the kitchen. Some men were out on jobs and some remained at the center. A couple of people at the phones in the office were making calls looking for jobs for the men. There was some good organization at work here with fairly complete and informative files on each man seeking a job. Some lived at the center and some had homes and families.

They made a trip by Charlie's, saw the beginnings of the new shop and met his student mechanics. Charlie explained that as part of their training outside school and his paying customers, they'd be repairing vehicles for those who couldn't afford to get the work done. One of the students was a young woman and from the look of the grease on her face, she wasn't afraid of the work at all.

Lance took a short detour to show Jason the lake and started to the ranch for lunch. "We'll take the horses and ride the ranch this afternoon," Lance told Jason.

"I've never ridden a horse," Jason confessed.

"Well, you're a big boy now and it's time you learned. We all help on the ranch, no matter what our job is, Clavo included." Lance explained that at certain times, every available hand was needed to get some things done.

Lunch was roll your own sandwiches, a sharp contrast to the meal the night before, but more in style with what Jason was accustomed to. Dan, Tim, and Bob didn't come in for lunch, but the boys, Brian and Shaun had gotten out of school early and were there. Jason was amazed at finding out they were just eighteen, they were big guys and he'd been certain they were older.

Lance brought saddle bags with a few beers in them and a blanket along on the ride. He led them up the roughest route he knew, along the creek from the ranch end up along the bank toward the farthest end on the thirty section place. The highest of the small dams crossed the creek there, crossing and recrossing the creek as they moved upward. The random placement of the rock appeared to an untrained eye, to form a natural waterfall where the creek washed over the rocks. Lance spread the blanket and passed Jason a beer. It had been more than a ten mile ride. Finishing the last beers they headed back down, but taking the opposite side of their route up; and never tracing the same steps all the way to the stables. Leaving the horses to Johnny and Gary, they walked back to the house. Lance brought some more beers, stripped and got in the whirlpool saying to Jason "you're going to need this, so get in."

"You're an amazing little dude, you know that?" Jason commented to Lance.

"Thanks, I guess. We've gotten used to that word from Paul and Frank constantly using it, but in these parts, it's not normally a complement. I wouldn't use it around cowboys away from the ranch unless you like to fight."

"Sorry, I'll watch my mouth," he said gripping Lance's thigh. "You have a damn fine ass, too. I've been thinking about it all day."

That just led to silence and left Lance red faced. Dan, Tim, and Bob, came in and joined them, beers in hand. "We had to look at some property today and couldn't get back until now," Bob explained. "Did you have a good day?"

Everything that had transpired, Jason repeated in detail adding at last that he'd never ridden a horse before. Glancing at Jason's hand still planted on Lance's thigh, Dan remarked "it looks like you two have become better friends, too."

"What's up with my truck?" Jason asked.

"I thought the construction company did you dirty. I figured that even if you didn't take the job, my conscience would be clear if I paid it off. Call it severance pay well deserved from one of the owners of the company." Bob paid thirty five hundred; Jason wasn't far from having it paid off.

It was settled for the time being that Jason would bunk with Lance. Lance just nodded a yes when asked, but Jason's hand felt him quivering which told him more. "What do you do for fun out here?" Jason inquired.

"I'm the resident entertainment expert," Tim spoke up "other than a few hole in the wall bars in town, we have to make our own fun. Drinking tops the list, followed by fishing, followed by more drinking, followed by getting together with friends, and lastly drinking while playing pool. We're looking for new activities to add to the list if you have any suggestions." Dan threw in that they'd taken two trips, but most of the men hadn't ever traveled very far away before, it was something new.

CHAPTER FIFTY TWO

June came with most of the work finished or at a stopping point for another trip. Even the grain finished and was combined two weeks early. The feeder calves were finished out in the feed lots near the lots and barns where heifers and cows had their calves and were loaded into trucks and sent to market. Planning left no obstacle to the entire group leaving the ranch. Brian and Shane had graduated a few weeks earlier and were both nineteen now.

Jason had been so successful in finding jobs for the men at the center, only two remained and they usually had day labor offered them. They were moved into the smaller house and with the kitchen stocked, did their own cooking. Bill Miller checked on them every morning, locked up the building as he left, and went fishing. All the houses had been completed. The shop was open and operating at Charlie's. The foundation for the winery was curing, waiting for building to begin.

Debate about the destination had gone on for nearly two months. All the desired features were hard to meet in one location. They wanted nightlife they never found at the ranch. They wanted mountains to explore and beaches with warm water for swimming and all in a place completely opposite their desert home. Distance was a factor because the range of the jet without stopping to refuel was three thousand miles. There were restrictions on international travel that had expanded and ultimately the choice was Puerto Rico.

As they had done in Cancun, everyone split up into couples or groups. The boys were even allowed in the clubs, they just weren't supposed to drink, but once inside their more mature appearance earned them a few drinks anyway. One pilot brought his wife and two teenage sons along and the other brought a guy. The plane never left and they took a vacation with the men from the ranch. It was even extended to sixteen days and four days were a cruise from San Juan to the nearby islands to the southeast.

Hayden and Jared were the pilot's sons. They were barely eighteen and twins. Like Brian and Shaun they were in overdrive trying to squeeze every moment out of the trip. Both were athletes and big guys, near the same size as Brian. Their common ground ended there. Life in the city contrasted sharply from the small community of Desolation.

Both pilots and their companions kept a distance from their employer, while still enjoying the time off. Almost everyone spent some time driving around the island. The Mexican guys seemed to prefer San Juan and the beaches nearby, though. The cruise was the highlight of the trip. It was a big ship and groups only saw each other passing down the corridors or ashore when the ship made harbor.

Back in San Juan, two days were left before the flight home. Dan and Tim spent the last two days exploring the old Spanish forts and the older parts of the city. Quent and Scotty went on a quest to find seeds and small plants to take back to the greenhouses. For Lance, Johnny, Gary, and dragging Jason along; it was all about horses. The beach and the surf was more than enough to keep the others busy. That evening Brian asked if the pilot's sons could come back and stay at the ranch for a while before they returned home. Dan agreed, if the boys would all stay in Martin's house while they were there.

The flight home was a constant exchange of stories between the vacationers, relating their adventures while on the trip. The flight pushed the range limit of the plane on the trip home. The trip out had been with the winds and returning fought against them. They had to radio ahead to have a fuel truck waiting so the plane could make it back to Meacham Field.

A lot of the summer work was already planned. Brian and Shaun would be showing their calves several times. Jason went along to promote the ranch and find kids wanting to show calves, but needing help to buy a calf or providing for their needs. Some of the livestock shows were held while rodeos were going on at the same time, which brought Lance, Gary, and Johnny along on the same trips, as well as others of the cowboys wanting to take part in competitions. Haden and Jared, the pilot's sons decided to stay for the summer after the first few days and were quickly renamed 'the shadows' because they followed along everywhere Brian and Shaun went. They fell right in helping with the ranch work, too, but there were after work treks to the lake almost every day.

The vines in the vineyards were growing rapidly. At the same time, both the winery construction and beekeeping replaced all the work of the previous summer. Tim and Scotty stayed busy extending the series of dams down the creek through the original ranch. The creek had stopped flowing and was dry down stream, but still held a lot of water where the ponds had been put in. Irrigation for the summer crops was a regular task. Where the fall grain had grown, cover crops had taken their place. Insemination of the cows was on schedule, but no feeder calves would be bought this year, allowing the expanded breeding herds to fill the unused pasture.

Sye and Dave picked up the tricks of beekeeping pretty fast working with Paul and Frank on the ranch. Like Dan and Tim, they had a growing wind farm already operating and the two things had recouped their original investment. Their success and Bob's offer of help to the other men, spurred them on to invest in land themselves. Jason was the most reluctant having lived spending as fast as he made money in the past. He and Lance were the most recent additions to the crew, but Lance had a huge savings account built up over years of training horses and not needing to spend much on expenses.

In July at one stock show Shaun's calf made grand champion and Brian's made reserve. Two weeks later, Brian's made grand champion at another show. They could have held them for the state fair, but let them go to sale. Both were bulls. Shaun got seventy two thousand and Brian got sixty five. With their savings and a personal loan from Bob, they bought ten sections together. The shadows were amazed. Wind generators were going up a week later. Bob had assured them their college would be paid for by the ranch. Actually, Bob had made sure any graduate from Desolation would have their college education fully funded.

At the auction the first thing that became apparent to the boys was that most of the kids were only breaking even or making a small amount above the cost of their calves and repaying the feed bill. All the showmen spent a lot of time with their animals; the pride they took was obvious where ribbons were absent. More than a few tears were shed, some from disappointment, but others because of the attachment that had grown while working with the animals readying them to show. Beaming smiles of pride when the pictures displaying their ribbons softened into a mild sadness for the losers and they left with a determination to make a difference in the lives of others. One of the shadows, Haden, was caught in the sentiment of the moment and said "People don't start out even in this world. In athletics some were blessed with the right body and abilities that needed only minimal training while others would never excel with any amount of work." To them all, it was the same as starting out with show calves from the superior bloodlines Bob raised, no different and the winning more luck than work.

Jason was still having a hard time adjusting to life in Desolation. Getting away helped, but the limited activities available left him bored. He didn't want to move back to the city. He got more pleasure from his work than he'd gotten from any job before. With Lance, one week they were lovers and the next would decide they were best friends, but never stopped sleeping together after the first night. The sex was always great. With Lance buying property too, he was feeling owned more than loved. It was a reminder he had nothing to show for years of working. He helped with house plans, roughed out to send to the architects and gave a lot of good advice, but every time Lance referred to some room or feature as Jason's, he winced. Lance would say "You can catch up with me on the money part, you make more." He still felt he wasn't contributing.

The place Lance bought was two sections and three miles closer to Desolation, but like Bob's ranch, it was at the end of a road. Bridges to cross the creek were expensive, so rather than build a lot of them, the roads ended before getting to the creek, leaving just a few bridges that crossed to the opposite side. Being closer in, Lance's property was on the system of canals for irrigation and had back-up wells, but the price of the land was near double what the others were paying. The fences were still in bad shape. It was all fields and no rough pasture except a strip along each side of the same creek that flowed through the ranch. It had a rutted road crossing the creek that wouldn't be any use at all after a heavy rain when the flow was high.

Wind generators went in on Lance's property, too. No one outside those who worked for Bob and had bought property was putting them in. It wasn't costing any cash outlay and made income even while the investment was paid off. All the men had managed to buy property and get wind farms started. Jason, going against advice from Bob, bought two sections adjoining Lance borrowing what was needed for the purchase. He barely got the grants approved and wind generator construction started when Washington decided , in spite of rising energy prices and demand, to end the program calling it unnecessary spending. The more likely explanation was that the grant program contained restrictions in the fine print keeping politicians from channeling funds to family, friends, or large corporations that funded their campaigns.

All the men together, unknown to them, owned three hundred and sixty sections and Bob had three hundred and forty five sections himself, nearly all of it bought for thirty five dollars an acre or less. As crop land or pasture the low price was a stretch if a man thought he'd make a profit, but when the crop was wind turned into electricity, the picture changed. Bob's lawyers had handled everything including the loan for Jason like a gambler playing roulette, saying 'let it ride'. Not even Bob knew how much he or the men had.

CHAPTER FIFTY THREE

Jason felt guilty about his inability to contribute equally with Lance on their property. He was assured the wind generators would take care of his land payment, so he was using his income from Bob to get started building the house. Every day after work or during free time, he was there doing work himself. He hired contractors to pour the foundation, do the framing, and get the roof on and have it dried out figuring he could do the rest over time. The framing crew finished early this day. The windows were in, the exterior was sheathed and wrapped, and the metal roof was complete. Their contract was done. Jason gave the contractor a check, holding back twenty percent as was normal and left while they were loading up their tools and equipment. He'd been loading rock from the creek bed to use on the house. None of the crew had faces familiar to Jason; all had come to Desolation from town and didn't seem very friendly. Jason was glad the framers were gone. His bank account was only a little above the escrow amount owed the contractor and for a while any work would be done more by muscle than by spending money.

Clavo was at the bank having Laura check his balance. His youngest brother had asked him to help with tuition for college in the fall. His parent's income wasn't enough to be of much help and Clavo hadn't had much extra until he started working with the foundation and charities Bob set up. His land investments kept him from knowing just how much cash he had on hand. The two thousand his brother needed might overdraw his account and he didn't want to chance it.

"I didn't know priests had this kind of money. Are you secretly rich Clavo? Your balance is sixty five thousand three hundred and twenty seven dollars and eighty two cents" Laura told him.

"Can you tell me where the deposits came from? That's a lot more than seems possible" Clavo asked.

Laura typed a few keys. "There was sixty thousand three hundred deposited from the electric company transferred to your account last week and two thousand from the foundation transferred yesterday."

"Thanks" he said and left the bank. The electric company deposit was double his yearly salary as a priest and not far below the generous pay Bob gave him for his role at the foundation. Up until now, he'd only received his pay from the church and the rest was being managed by Bob's lawyers. He was definitely confused.

Brian and Shaun were tube floating in the lake while the 'shadows', the two brothers, were on the shore. They were on a cell phone and even though too far away for Brian to hear what was being said, it got pretty loud. Paddling back in Shaun asked "What was that all about?"

"We were supposed to start two a days on Monday and we don't want to go back" Jared replied. "I told Dad, Bob had been paying us all summer. I should have told him before. I said I didn't even get off the bench last football season and didn't think it was worth all the pain."

"I said I only got to play five quarters and felt the same way." Hayden said more. "If we worked here and stayed here we might get to play at this school. I don't think he'll go for it but he said he'd talk to Bob, it just better not interfere with his job is all. We had better hang for a while in case the shit hits the fan." Hayden passed a beer to each boy. They had only brought eight with them and these were the first they drank.

They sat there drying in the sun for a while. Looking straight at Hayden, Brian asked "Were you two fucking last night? The noises you were making got me all boned up."

"No way man, we just watched a porno and were beating off is all," Hayden answered, looking down the whole time.

"You got boned listening to two guys moaning?" Jared asked back to Brian.

"Yeah, and you did too fucker. Yours was pressed up against my ass and you were rubbing it all around. I thought I was fixing to get fucked," Brian responded to Jared.

"If I'm going to fuck you, you're going to feel a lot more than a little rubbing against your cute ass, fucker," Jared teased Brian now.

"One of these days we might just find out about that," Brian teased back.

"We were doing a little more than jacking," Shaun confessed "We were jacking each other and it wasn't bad at all. It's better than your own hand, anyway."

Brian looked at Shaun "You know Blondie ain't ever wrong, bro."

"That don't mean someone ever did anything before" Shaun responded.

"Maybe not, but I bet they at least thought about it" Brian was certain now.

"What are you guys talking about, horses can't talk" Hayden asked.

The hidden talents Blondie possessed were explained and added to that the fact she liked Hayden, but Jared remained a mystery. She didn't respond to him as she did to the others, but didn't get pissed off either; she just acted comfortable around him. It was a good sign, but not a definite answer. They drank their other beers and went to the ranch.

Bob was on the phone with the boys' dad when Clavo came in. All the boys came in from the lake before the call was finished and were followed shortly thereafter by the rest of the crew except Jason and Lance. He looked toward them holding his hand up like a signal to stop and shut the office door. Each of them got a drink and waited silently for Bob to come out.

Bob addressed the boys first when he came out. After a very long conversation with both parents and considering everything that was said, the three had decided the boys could live at the ranch. Both parents could fly out any time or take the boys home if they wanted to visit the city. He added that he had also talked to both Brian's and Shaun's parents, thinking all four boys should be together for the arrangement to work out. Their parents also agreed. Brian and Shaun had already been at the ranch almost constantly now for two summers and over a year during school. They'd be starting college courses together at the local community college and commuting. Their parents were a few miles away. It was an easy sell.

He opened the subject that brought all the men to the house by saying that the lawyers had their earning from the investments sent directly to everyone until some decisions could be made for future investments. Things had changed with the land and wind farm opportunities making it impractical. He said they would discuss each person's situation individually and some options existed. "The lawyers are the financial wizards; I just do what they tell me."

After two hours on the phone, Bob didn't feel like any more talking so he'd said everything as simply and quickly as possible. He fixed a tall glass of straight whiskey and drank it down.

Paul spoke up "You're a sap Bob. If I'd known I'd get rich keeping bees, I wouldn't have wasted all that time trying to be a rock star."

Jason had all the rocks he wanted to carry loaded in the bed of the truck. He had his pistol in a shoulder holster. Three times today he'd turned over a rock to find a rattler curled underneath it. He might be broke and having to make do loading these fucking rocks, but he'd be damned if he had to see the same snake twice. He'd heard all the arguments before. Snakes serve a purpose or the one about knowing which snakes were good snakes and which snakes were bad snakes. It was simple to Jason, rattlers rattled and the only thing any snake he saw was going to be was a dead snake, period.

Even his truck pissed him off now. It was really the rocks. He should be in a great mood with the house dried in now, he just wasn't. He'd bought a standard with a floor shift because everyone told him it would haul loads better. Right off he hated it, but it was paid off now thanks to Bob. In traffic jams in Dallas it had been pure hell to drive. The clutch had gone out twice already. He figured out the reason everyone pushed him to buy the floor shift was not because it was better for anything, it was because they thought it was cool, and more than that, they didn't have to drive the damn thing. He revved it to pull away with the load of rock and when it didn't move, he let off the gas. It rolled back and one rear tire was left hanging airborne with the axle sitting on rock. He looked around trying to see something he could do to get it out. All he could think of was bringing the tractor from the ranch and pulling it out. He reached inside and grabbed his keys. Looking at them in his hand he realized how stupid that was. If he couldn't get it out, nobody could steal the damn thing, it had just been habit. He took the cooler with the beers inside and began his walk to the new house. The creek was at the far back, so it would be nearly a two mile walk. Lance should be there when he arrived.

As he got close, he heard yelling. No one should be yelling. He could see Lance's truck and another one usually driven by one of the framers. He could hear the words now and took a path out of the line of sight. One man stood to the side and another was hitting Lance with the pistol grip across the face. Blood was everywhere. He said, "You fucking faggot. We know you live at the Esterhazy place now; they're all just a bunch of faggots out there, aren't they? This time you're gonna die faggot and so will all of them."

Without hesitating, Jason drew his pistol from the holster and shot the man dead on between the eyes. The other man shot immediately, but only grazed Jason's arm. With another shot he hit the second man in the chest, and the man fell. He called 911 on his cell phone, telling what had occurred and gave directions. He called the ranch and told Scotty the same thing and that the ambulance was being sent. Then he took Lance's hand in his and said "hang on cowboy, I'm not going anywhere." Then he cried.

CHAPTER FIFTY FOUR

The men and boys took off toward Lance's house as soon and they got the call. They drove up almost at the same instant as the Sheriff's deputies arrived. The ambulance was a couple of minutes behind that. One deputy instructed them to stay back out of the area and it was a Mexican standoff immediately. Both attackers were dead at the scene. Pictures were taken of the scene before anything else was done. It only took a moment. Lance was in bad shape but able to speak as he was loaded into the ambulance. Jason got his arm bandaged and was told to come to the hospital as soon as possible, but released. Another ambulance carried the bodies away as the interrogation began. Everything said was in clear earshot of all the men. The basic story was taken down and a deputy drove the patrol car to confirm that Jason's truck was stuck and was back a few minutes later.

The tone of the interrogation changed at that point. Bob got on his cell phone to his lawyer instructing him to come immediately. He sent the boys to clear out both their room in the house and Martin's house, moving their things to the empty bunkhouse, and to prepare another room there as well. The question that set Bob off was "This is the third time in less than a year that Lance has been attacked. Is he doing something to provoke these attacks?" Jason was only able to say he had no knowledge of the previous attacks. Bob called Charlie to ask if he and Maria would check on Lance at the hospital and call him back, then he quietly called Brian giving him instructions to bring his guns to Lance's place.

Brian knew where the key to the gun cabinet was kept and grabbed pistols and ammunition for the men. He drove alone and parking next to Bob's truck and transferred the guns to it and left. Shaun had called his dad. Charlie sent Maria with Sally and Laura. He drove with Bill Miller to see what was going on. Patti called her boss at the co-op. The questioning continued and the contractor arrived, because his truck hadn't been returned to his shop.

An hour and a half after Bob called the lawyers, the plane landed at the ranch. When they arrived at the scene questioning was still continuing. Shortly after that, nearly sixty residents of Desolation, mostly members of Gary and Shaun's family or the church, were lined up and down the road surrounding the new house and all exits from the property was blocked. Even Johnny's dad was there. They were quiet. They were orderly. Most of all, they were listening. Questioning the contractor as well, he admitted hearing the attackers discuss what they planned to do from the first time they saw Lance at the property, and they discussed attacking him the previous time, they had even named the attackers from the first incident in town.

Johnny listened along with everyone else as these two deputies made accusations against Lance and the men of the ranch, justifying the attackers actions Each question in succession came closer to outright saying it was fine to kill gay men, whatever the circumstances. None of the questions directly pertained to the events. Johnny saw a stark difference between these deputies and the one who arrived at the trainer's barn after the last attack. He took the other deputies card from his wallet and called him. Explaining the situation to him and the fact that the interrogation had now gone on for several hours with most of Desolation's men quietly listening, the deputy said he would be there as soon as possible. When he arrived, the Sheriff was with him, both in plain clothes and riding in the deputy's pick-up, not a county vehicle. They stood near Johnny, just listening themselves.

The boys and the pilot at the ranch had decided they needed to fix something for everyone to eat and made a huge pot of stew. It had been such a long time since the plane arrived, the attack happened around two in the afternoon and the plane arrived near four thirty. It was nearly eight in the evening now. With the longest day of summer at hand, it would be dark around nine.

The sheriff and his deputy had listened on for an hour. Most unusual was the patience of the onlookers, the cowboys and men of Desolation. The interrogators and the contractor seemed to feed off each other as they spoke; acting as if the gathered men were in support of what they said, like an audience. They left Jason very little opportunity to respond. Jason had lost a lot of blood before being bandaged, and that hadn't been done properly, just temporarily done to last until he reached the hospital. Blood was trickling down his arm again. He was the least well known of all the men at the ranch, but his work with the foundation, community center, and charities had made a positive impression on everyone. When Jason fell over, the crowd began to murmur and Clavo rushed to his side. The sheriff and the deputy moved forward revealing their presence as Clavo checked on Jason and were joined by Bob's Lawyers who had also observed along with the crowd.

Bob had sent for the guns because it looked to him as if the two deputies would take over where the dead attackers had left off. If it had been an army he faced in that situation, he wasn't going to let anything else happen. The men who had been listening didn't know what to think about the things being said. They did know Bob and some of the men from the ranch, and had for all their lives. The sense was that the line between right and wrong was a clear line. Lawmen were there to protect people and these two deputies weren't interested in that. The contractor's own words told that he knew the dead men intended to kill Lance and had done nothing about it. He even encouraged their actions. Jason had acted to stop it from happening and been wounded doing so, but was now being treated as if he had done wrong. Any one of them would have done the same as Jason did.

The sheriff handcuffed the contractor and put him in the back of the patrol car, under protest from the interrogators. The sheriff said in response response, "He knew beforehand what was going to happen. They were in his truck and acting with his approval. A court can decide but I call that accessory to attempted murder." Tow trucks were called to take both his vehicles away and the one used by the dead men would be impounded. He demanded the deputies' guns, badges and even their uniform shirts. They were left there to walk as the crowd drove away.

A train of vehicles followed Bob back to the ranch, with only the sheriff and the lone deputy taking another route on their way to town and the jail. He dropped Johnny off entering the gate to direct those behind him to the cookhouse. Knowing the women had no cell phones, he made a call to the hospital to check on Lance as Clavo tended to Jason. Then he called Lance's family. It wasn't an easy call to make. There was no news to relate. Lance's condition was critical and he was in surgery with internal bleeding.

With Jason put to bed, Clavo left for the hospital to relieve the women saying it was his job. Bob joined the others in the cookhouse. He caught them up on the situation saying Clavo would call as soon as more was known about Lance's condition. His opinion was that it was best to get back to their life and work as quickly as possible. He asked the lawyers to explain the finances of the ranch to everyone, not just the men working there because he thought it really involved the community as a whole. Bob melted back into a chair with a bowl of stew and a beer letting the lawyer take the attention of the room.

He began with a brief history of the family and the ranch, saying the ranch had been very much a business operation at one time and detailing the growth of the Esterhazy Company. With Bob's mother's death, the ranch was scaled back and all the efforts focused on the company. At Bob's father's death, the law firm and investment experts assumed the responsibilities of the company's management and the investments. The ranch had become a hobby for Bob until the adjacent property was bought. The wind farm had been Bob's idea and with grants available, it was expanded and the employees were included while some of Bob's assets went into the foundation. When Congress voted to end the program, Bob had us liquidate all his assets except enough funds to keep his company in operation. The foundation was inactive and its funds were added as well. Everything was used to purchase more land and get the wind generators before the program ended. Earnings were to pay back the funds that were liquidated and be divided among the men after everything was repaid. Within the last month the grant program was ended, signaling a change in direction was needed and leaving Bob with forty nine percent and the employees with fifty one percent of the wind farm investments as Bob instructed. Everything was still held as a group called Esterhazy Associates Specialty Investments. The first individual checks had been issued to give all the men some available cash and it could remain one business or be divided into individual properties by the end of the year. Haden and Jared had been included as part of the group the day before at Bob's request, before the tragedy happened. Bob's totals were incomplete. The total was seven hundred and five sections with Bob owning three hundred and forty five sections and each man owning an equal share of the balance. The land itself held little or no value and much of it had been offered for sale for over thirty years. If divided each man would receive about half a million a month and Bob nearly nine million a month beginning the first of the next year or it could kept together for other investments or purposes. The foundation and charities had been fully funded with over ten million in trust and Bob's investments and company had been valued at two hundred million separately from the ranch. One shift in the finances before all the funds were repaid could result in everything being lost except the ranch and wind farm. The winery had unlimited earning potential, being one of the world's largest single vineyards.

There was a stunned silence at the end of his discussion. "So the wind generators were all Bob's idea?" Brian asked.

"Yes, we never thought of it and never met anyone else who discussed it." The lawyer replied.

"Don't look at me" Bob said "I only knew I had enough money I didn't need to worry and tried to break even with my breeding herd until a little over a year ago. I'm finding out most of this right now, along with you." He went back to eating his stew.

Everyone left except the men of the ranch, the lawyers, and four fathers; Gary's, Johnny's, Brian's and the pilot. Even the boys had a beer, with their fathers' approval. They were waiting on news about Lance but discussing the money while they waited. They didn't spend much of what they earned on the ranch and with what the ranch produced; only a moderate amount was spent on food. It was only possible to spend a certain amount on beer, alcohol, and supplies. Giving money away as Bob had tried doing with the foundation and charities were more work than the good it accomplished. Locally, most of the good that could be done had already been done and the large foundation building now sat idle and unused, except for the community center. Any investment they made was likely to make more money. They all loved working on the ranch. If the investments were left together, they were all part owners of the ranch and Bob wouldn't need to pay them anymore.

"One option you have is to continue buying land and putting up wind generators." A lawyer pointed out. "Without the grants, it would require a lot more money. The power companies would still maintain them and if you find other options you can move funds to pursue them."

All in agreement, that course was chosen. It would give them a life as close to it had been as possible, but with the knowledge that there was no need to worry about money. Even the work of the ranch could be changed because its main crop was wind power.

Clavo called a little before midnight. Lance was in intensive care, but the outlook was good. He would be confined to bed rest for at least a month and had lost his spleen and had several broken ribs. His family had arrived and Clavo was coming home.

The Lawyers took Martin's house for the night, the pilot and the shadows stayed in the unused bunkhouse, and Brian and Shaun returned to their room in the house. No one got to bed until after two; tomorrow would start very late for everyone.

Bob woke to the sound of the phone ringing. Clavo didn't stir at all. The clock read ten. After the third ring, Bob answered and heard the sheriff's voice on the other end. Jason had been no-billed and the deaths were ruled self defense, but the sheriff warned that there might be trouble from others who were not arrested.

It was too soon after waking up to think. As the coffee maker began to drip into the pot, he heard the sounds of the house beginning to stir. The phone must have worked as an alarm when it rang. Jason appeared first, not looking much better for all the rest he'd gotten. "How is Lance?" he asked.

Clavo replied, coming into the kitchen, "It will take a while, but he should recover. His family got there before I left last night."

"I think Lance and I should stay here, after what happened" Jason said. "I tried to look out for him all the time, but he never seemed concerned."

"It's hard to understand someone hating you when you've never done anything bad or mean in your life." Bob went on "in school I didn't have any friends and nobody liked me. I never did anything to anyone. I've lived most of my life out here on the ranch because of it. No one had a reason to hate me then, they just choose to. Now it seems people have a reason. If they hate people they think are gay, enough to kill them, we might all be safer if we stay close and keep an eye on each other."

Gradually more of the household joined them in the kitchen. When they all had some coffee and were dressed, they made their way down to the bunkhouse to check on everyone there. Eric, the pilot who was the 'shadows' father and the lawyers wanted a look around the ranch; so the task fell to Bob. Clavo and Jason needed to visit Lance and left for the hospital.

CHAPTER FIFTY FIVE

Scotty and Quent were in the greenhouses puttering around to kill some time and forget about the events of the last day. The year before there was nothing left in the garden by mid July, but with the water coolers and protection offered by the greenhouse, the heat and bugs hadn't done much damage inside. The outside garden was only dead plants, bare dirt, some okra, melons and black eyed peas. Nothing else remained.

Seedling trees grew outside the houses sheltered by shade cloth. Most had reached three to four feet in height but wouldn't be ready to plant for the wind rows until fall or the next spring. Quent had planted thirty species, those that were useful for the bees and others that only conformed to the height and shape needed, but all the trees were able to thrive in the desert climate even if the irrigation system failed for a time.

Scotty didn't know to what use he would put the vegetables and greens he gathered. He'd tried some Asian and uncommon vegetables looking for things that tolerated the heat better. He had the usual tomatoes, peppers, squash, and cucumbers and some eggplant that were already dead outside still producing inside. It was still hot. He took off his shirt and hung it near the door so it wouldn't be forgotten when he left.

"Do you think anyone will try to hurt us, too, like Jason heard the men say?" Quent asked him.

"We might need to watch out for Gary and Lance, but they're small guys. The rest of us are pretty big. I don't think those assholes have the balls to take on anyone that can put up a fair fight," Scotty replied. "It's a fucked up deal."

"Somebody would do the same to us at home if they knew we're gay and you know it." Quent was realistic. He'd heard guys talking about beating up queers ever since he knew what queers were. It had always bothered him hearing it. They were talking about him, and he'd never let them even suspect he was queer no matter what he had to do. Even though he loved Scotty, before now he would never have been seen with Scotty in public if anyone thought Scotty was queer. He would have been a coward and a liar, but he would have survived. "You can't do nothing about nothing if you're dead man."

"Maybe we could go somewhere else," Scotty started, getting cut off by Quent.

"If some asshole would kill me here, where everybody's known me all my life, there ain't no better place on this earth. Thinking so is crazy."

Scotty knew he was right. You can't run away from who you are, you can only hold out some hope that people see what is good in you above what they think is wrong. They went back to puttering among the plants.

Paul was loading frames into the centrifuge to spin out the honey while Frank ran it through the filter. Mario and Juan were removing wax from the frames that had been emptied of their honey. There was a nicely set up room now, for processing everything. Yesterday, just before the call came alerting them to the shooting, they had brought in a truck load of frames to process and had left them where they sat.

"This is the last batch," Paul said, removing them from the machine. "I'll start washing them down and disinfecting them." He had a steam power washer in the next room that siphoned bleach into the mix as it sprayed out the nozzle. He was never sure how important it was to disinfect the frames before using them again, but his dad and granddad always did it, so he did it, too. The wax had to be washed, too, but only with soap and cool water to get any remaining honey off so it wouldn't be sticky. It got soaked overnight and just rinsed the next day. They all finished about the same time.

"In Mexico, if it wasn't family, we'd have the same shit happen to us that happened to Lance," Paul observed, 'it's the silencio, ignoring that we're gay and not discussing it that brings tolerance."

"I ain't into being tolerated," Frank replied in a rare moment when he felt like talking. "I'm not sub-human. I've got a right to be myself just like everyone else, not just in California where they don't give a shit, but everywhere." Paul grasped his hand and kissed it.

Juan and Mario had never worked with bees before. It was pretty simple and they learned quickly. They'd hesitated when the first hive swarmed, but after Paul showed them how to move some royal jelly to an empty hive to get the swarm to move in, they jumped right into it. They had even gotten better at speaking English. Paul and Frank might speak Spanish and listen to Spanish music a lot, but they'd grown up speaking English and would only translate part of what was said when the words weren't understood clearly.

"You guys sure smell sweet," Sye joked as they entered the bunkhouse.

Paul responded by grabbing his crotch and saying, "You can have a nice long lick on my sweet meat if you want to."

"Maybe when I get hungry" Sye joked again.

It wasn't very late yet, nearly four was all. The four cowboys figured that since they weren't going to get any work done, everyone needed to eat. Dave had brisket and ribs going out back. James had a pot of beans cooking. James was finished with a batch of coleslaw and Clint was just keeping them all with fresh cold beers while they cooked. They'd called Scotty and he was bringing corn bread from the house because the jet was still parked on the runway and it looked like there would be company for supper. They were mistaken. The group from the plane returned with Bob from their tour and after a quick goodbye to his son's, Eric and the lawyers headed down the runway back to the city.

Bob knew the men wanted to ask questions more than they wanted a tour of the ranch. Every time one of the men started to speak he began another long dissertation detailing what was being done on the ranch. He didn't want to be asked some questions and didn't give any opportunity to be asked them. His throat was so dry from talking when he walked into the bunkhouse; he killed three beers one after another. Bob Esterhazy was a quiet man. Talking for so long wasn't an easy thing for him to do.

The six younger guys spent the afternoon at the horse barn. With Lance in the hospital, working with the horses made them feel closer to him. Having the jet parked in sight of the barn meant Harlan and Jared wouldn't miss seeing their dad before he left, so they all hung around there sitting on the big bales of hay.

Tim made calls around town in between pool shots. All he did was knock the balls around, pick up the cue ball and position it for another shot he wanted to try with Dan sitting nearby keeping him company. The news of Lance being attacked and the deaths of his attackers reached beyond the local area. He asked several friends to go to bars, listen, and let him know what they heard. He'd pick up the tab for their drinks. There weren't a lot of bars in town and Tim had been in all of them. He hadn't gone out much since going to work at the ranch, though.

Clavo returned from the hospital alone. He couldn't drag Jason away. Lance mostly slept and his parents returned home, leaving him in the care of the staff with words to the two men to check on him and let them know if he needed anything. One of the priests from the church in town passed by visiting a sick parishioner and not wanting to leave Jason without a vehicle, Clavo begged a ride to the ranch.

Life couldn't return to normal, but with everything talked out and Lance's gradual recovery, the tension lessened. The hot days of August demanded relief. A stretch of twenty two days above one hundred degrees almost halted all outside activity except during the early morning or time spent at the lake or in the pool.

Sixteen boys composed the entire high school age male student population, including the added presence of Hayden and Jared. Practice was less obsessive than it had been in the city and was held during the week from six to seven in the morning leaving the boys free all day. The tolerable morning hours were spent laying adobe bricks on the winery or making new bricks. Shaun and Brian inseminated cows to keep to the schedule. Jason laid rock to finish out the exterior of the new house, but it looked unlikely it would ever be occupied. Although he bought all the lumber used to frame the house himself, the check for the work was never cashed. The contractor was out on bail, so there was no explanation.

A sickeningly sweet aroma pervaded the entire ranch. The hives had been evenly spaced around the property and even with the shade canopies above each group of hives and the constant beating of wings by the bees too cool them, honey dripped down from every hive in the heat. The hot breeze carried the scent to every corner; it was inescapable. "The bees need all the honey right now" Paul said. "All the flowers have stopped blooming and they eat a lot of honey to try to keep the hives cool." The beekeepers laid and made bricks, too.

Tim, Dan, Bob, and Clavo started a ritual of afternoon drives in the air conditioned pick-ups checking out more of the new properties. There were a few stock tanks, some dry creek beds, and a few fields but except for the rough track built to erect the wind mills, most of the land looked to be in its natural state. In the heat of the day most animals sought the protection of the shade but occasionally the sound of the passing truck roused the resting wildlife. The suicide rabbits popped up doing their rapid direction changes intended to escape predators, but it returned them to the path the truck followed. Tim did his best to avoid killing any. Even a rabbit required water and the presence of any animal meant that somewhere nearby, in the bleak desert landscape, open water found its way to the surface. A stand of cottonwoods or any of the larger trees gave other evidence of water, but the men found only dry creek beds when they looked further.

There were some hills and more rugged terrain and some areas filled with large boulders. The grass was sparse as was the scrub brush and even the prickly pear and cactus. This was truly one cow to a hundred acre pasture land and adding a two thousand dollar well for a water source made use of the land an unprofitable endeavor. It seemed to the men, not knowing otherwise, that even bees should have some need for water to survive. Only the turning of the wind mills gave the land a purpose. In several weeks they were only able to see a fraction of the acreage they had purchased but they abandoned their quest. Time would come later to see more.

Lance managed to start moving about by the last week of August. His first venture away from the house was to see the horses. He found Johnny and Gary working with the horses.

"These horses have been missing you" Johnny said. He rubbed the nose of the sorrel gelding Johnny rode and Johnny added "We've gotten better learning your signals to them, cutting out calves" and he and Gary demonstrated separating one calf from the group and then another. One held the bunch of calves together while the other kept the separated calf away from the group.

"It will still be a while before I can ride" Lance confessed, "I might pull some stitches loose this soon."

That Friday night he made it to watch the shadows play football and on Sunday he went to church. He got around better using a cane. Everyone seemed glad to see him and wished him well. At church he was told by everyone he talked with that he had been in their prayers.

The fall harvest of maize was combined late and the winter grains were planted after the heat let up in early September. Bob decided against raising any feeder calves over the winter. With the larger breeding herd, the pasture and field rotations could go back to the scheme he used before more land had been bought. As Lance felt more like getting out, they bought horses to train and some to breed as well. Lance demonstrated skills at judging horses by their looks and posture none of the men had seen before. He would point to one and say, "See how he holds himself. Look at his ears. Look at how he holds his tail." He smiled and joked more than he had done since the attack.

CHAPTER FIFTY SIX

Lance raised himself up planting his elbows in the dirt to each side. Rolling slightly to the side, he got to his knees, then stood and dusted off his ass. This was his third flight from the horse's back through the air to land in the dirt in the last hour. He'd dubbed the horses 'good' when they were bought, but most were young and only green broke. Johnny retrieved Lance's hat and pushed it forward into his grasp. "You need some super glue in that saddle, man," Johnny kidded him.

Lance didn't get back on right then. He opened a beer and taking a couple of big gulps; he leaned back against the fence and rested his right boot heel on the lowest rail. He pushed his hat back a little to get a better view of Johnny and the horse. It was a big bay gelding. It had continued to buck and kick for a few minutes after tossing Lance in the dirt. With it calm now, Johnny mounted him stepping into the stirrup and throwing his leg over the horses back in one smooth motion. The bay bucked three times and reined in, letting Johnny take control.

"All that's wrong is that horse was broke by a big man. He's annoyed with a light ass like mine on his back and his bucking is just him swatting flies off his back. Tie me a hundred pound weight to his saddle and he'll work fine for me until he gets used to it." Lance was certain of his judgment.

Most of the men were inside the lot but Jason, Dan, and Tim were outside the fence and had been joined by the deputy who came to Lance's aid in the past. "I'd say you could handle yourself in a fair fight from the way you shake off the punishment that horse dishes out," the deputy remarked.

"I always have before but I'd rather get along than fight," Lance responded. "I haven't really had any enemies in my life. Everyone that I've gotten to know has become a friend and I never give anyone cause to feel otherwise."

"Being around you, I can see that myself" the deputy had just come by to see how things were going. "I enjoyed watching you work. I'll stop by again soon." He hadn't just seen Lance bucked off; he'd been around long enough to see some training taking place, too. Jason handed him a beer, too, he wasn't on duty.

Johnny put the horse back in its stall and the guys all started unbuckling their chaps and dusting themselves off. The chaps kept damage to their legs to a minimum working with the green broke horses. They wouldn't prevent a broken leg but the thick leather prevented a lot of cuts and scrapes and offered a little padding when legs met the dirt. They did nothing for your ass.

Jason had become a fair horseman. Harlan and Jared excelled though, for beginners. Where Jason didn't care for being bucked, the boys relished it. >From the rough play on the football field, they were tougher, whooping and hollering as the horse tried to throw them from its back. Unlike angry opponents on the field who might take things personally, the contest with the horse was just to see who was in control.

The Mexicans whooped and hollered as much as the boys did. Paul referred to anything that involved motion or felt good as 'surfing' of some type. Riding bucking green broke horses became 'equine surfing' and wading through the shallows of the ponds along the creek became 'toe surfing'. Whatever the intended meaning of 'butt hole surfing' might have been, he had his own slightly gayer definition.

It was beer and pizza night at the house. After getting his chaps off and dusting himself off good, Scotty hit the shower so he could get the pizza in the oven. They were already assembled and it was the thick crust kind he made best with several assortments of toppings. He slid the first two in the oven as guys started coming in the door.

After stuffing himself full of pizza and having another beer between pool shots, playing with Tim, the deputy said he was going home. "I'd have to give myself a DWI if I stayed any longer," he said, saying he'd see them all again and thanking them for the meal. Smackdown was on TV, so they turned down the volume, turned on the radio, and watched wrestling.

Friday was a bye for the football team because their opponent had a player out sick and couldn't field a team. In the small schools of the area, this was common and the game would be rescheduled if possible. It was only announced on Wednesday. Clavo couldn't get away on short notice, but everyone else went to Dallas to the state fair. They left on Friday afternoon and returned Sunday afternoon, staying near Hayden and Jared's home instead of near the fairgrounds. At the fair they were all scattered to the wind, but away from there transportation forced them to stay together. The boys did break away, borrowing Harlan's mom's SUV, visiting and partying with the two brother's friends.

Just the adults group was so large, it was hard to get around. Friday night they saw the Stockyards and Billy Bob's because their hotel was in Fort Worth. Saturday night they intended to go to some gay bars but were too tired after walking the fairgrounds all day. Sunday before leaving, they saw the museums, botanical gardens, and the Water Gardens, which would normally be a full day in itself, but they got a quick look anyway.

Clavo at least got rested. His busiest time was from Friday through Sunday. Spending the time alone gave him a lot of peace the normally busy house didn't allow. After mass, he'd gone into town. He had lunch and did some shopping he never seemed to find time for and then went by the hospital as he always did when he was in town. It was a small hospital. Most of the patients were elderly, clinging on to life or perhaps recovering, but unwilling to give up until they drew their last breath. Some may have yearned for the end to come, but they still fought against it.

One patient was a young man. He drew Clavo into a conversation. He might have been sixteen or eighteen. When asked what illness he suffered from, he answered "leukemia" and he hadn't yet responded to treatment but was assured by his doctors that he would overcome it and return to his normal state in time, it was still early in his treatment. The young man was feeling his own mortality.

A glow in his eyes outshined the loss of his hair and where his face was slightly drawn, his beauty in his youth was still very apparent. "I don't want to die without ever being in love," he told Clavo. His age and his sentiment was such that he was in love with love, the idea of being in love and the mystery of the emotions somehow held a force that could overcome anything. "Have you ever been in love, father?" he asked.

Clavo told him several stories of his loves and said "Those of us who are very confident flirt or tease a lot to find someone to love. Others lack that confidence and try to hide themselves, but they want to be loved, too. They just go about finding it the hard way and suffer in the process. The rest of us are driven to our own greatness by wanting to be loved. It's not a conscious act. Something in our soul, our spirit, tells us internally that if we do our best or shine our brightest that love will find us."

The young man seemed consoled by Clavo's words. Clavo said he would be in his prayers and he would visit again. On the ride home to the ranch, Clavo's own words replayed again in his thoughts. He wasn't sure if what he'd said was true for everyone, but it had been true in his own experience.

Clavo drove down to the creek at the back of the thirty sections. It was still hot even though it had cooled from the high temperatures a few weeks earlier. Trees hadn't grown enough around the ponds to provide any shade but near the big rocks on the high pond, he decided to fish for a while. His rod in the car already had a lure on it, so he trolled, throwing it out and reeling it back again. He snagged a little perch that fought like a whale; seeing its size as it hit the surface. Tossing it back in, he told it, "Send me back your big brother." Fish don't bite much in the heat of the day but a few minutes later another one was on his line. That one was a small bass. It was followed after a longer wait by an eating size bass of about a pound and a half. He tossed it back in as he'd done with the rest.

Fishing got Clavo in the mood to eat some. Knowing the guys would be hungry when they got home, he decided to cook a big Spanish Paella. He started with some chicken and sausage adding a variety of fresh vegetables, then rice, shrimp, fish, and frozen scallops since it was the only thing he had to substitute for mussels. He tried to copy his mother's recipe. With that going, he made a black bean soup to go with it. He fluffed the Paella when it was done and turned the soup down to a simmer. As he started to kick back on the couch, Dog scratched on the patio door. Instead of taking his usual spot by the fireplace, Dog curled up next to the couch where Clavo laid down. It was nap time until the men returned.

Eric, the pilot, stayed long enough to eat before taking off on the flight back to Fort Worth. He'd been reluctant to let the boys move to the ranch. Seeing them every few weeks, their attitude kept improving. They were working, where it had been an argument at home to get the trash taken out or the lawn mowed, and their grades were going up. He and Joan, their mother, had more time together now, too, and that was good.

Because everyone had split up at the fair, Clavo heard different stories from each one and it took three days for him to hear all the stories. Even repeat accounts of exhibits were seen differently through different eyes.

The next week, large equipment began to arrive for the winery. It wouldn't be needed for at least a year or two, but with the roof completed it had to be put in place before any more work on the building was done. Jason took charge of the construction.

The exterior walls, already completed, were six feet thick with three separate adobe walls built into one using bales of straw as insulation, stucco on the exterior side and smooth plaster on the interior that would eventually be covered with ceramic tile. The roof was insulated with a thick layer of urethane foam. With the doors all closed the interior would remain cool when temperatures exceeded one hundred outside. Two underground tunnels constructed of eight foot square concrete pipe sections extended a quarter mile from the building, twenty feet below the surface. Twin towers, like chimneys, worked with the tunnels circulating the air inside.

Engineers had consulted and designed everything to make maximum use of the space. Since the grapes would ripen at about the same time, large freezers would be added in time, to store juice so fermentation and bottling could go on year round. At present, the interior was open, only broken by steel columns, as equipment was moved inside. Working on the interior of the huge building would occupy the men's time over the winter.

CHAPTER FIFTY SEVEN

Laura began dating more after going to work at the branch bank. She only had two evenings free working for Sally and was free every evening now and on weekends. The little branch didn't have a drive through and customers had to go into town to do their banking on Saturdays.

She only went on double dates now. As she saw it, she had a better chance of getting to know a guy without putting herself in any bad situations if she wasn't alone on the date. Her method didn't always work. Twice she dated guys alone after a few double dates with them and found they were on good behavior in the company of others but changed when they had her alone.

Laura saved her money intending to buy a house. It was safer living with her Aunt Patti, so she bought a used pick-up instead, but kept her car as back up transportation. The bank was an easy walk but after loosing her car before coming to Desolation it gave her peace of mind to have two running vehicles. A pick-up was practical.

Whenever she got feeling lonesome, she went by the ranch for a while to visit with the guys. It might be once a week or not for several weeks depending on how busy she was. During the hottest days, she stayed home more, not wanting to get out much. The lake would have been great but she felt out of place around a bunch of kids and on the times she checked the fishing spot, Dan and Tim weren't there. She guessed their Saturday morning ritual had been replaced or become a less frequent pastime.

Johnny Mac had quit smoking weed when Donnie died, or maybe it was when he started working at the ranch, but it didn't matter. She was just as happy without it now. The bank said they gave piss tests, but never had.

Scotty's cooking was addictive. Laura tried to arrive after supper. Three times she ended up eating with the guys. Once she knocked on the door and Bob said "hold on a sec" and yelled to the guys "get your drawers on, we have company" because the guys were skinny dipping in the pool. She would drink a beer or two, visit a while, and go home. When Lance was hurt, she made sure to bring something for him to try and cheer him up. She came by when the guys were gone and found Dog on the back patio. His feeder was empty and a trash can full of food was beside it with a sign on the side that read 'FEED DOG', so she filled his feeder and scratched his ears.

Clavo came and opened the patio door as she was scratching Dog, still dressed in his black suit and clerical collar just returning from his Saturday evening mass. "The guys will be home tomorrow, they went to the state fair" he told her. She made excuses to leave quickly seeing he was tired and saying she'd see him soon.

A light rain was coming down as Laura neared the ranch a few days later. It was the first moisture to fall in many months. A semi was pulling out where the winery now stood and the men were gathered trying to move a huge stainless steel tank inside the building. It was on a low trailer being pulled by a tractor and tied down, but steadied as it rolled with ropes held by the men. She parked by the road and walked toward the building.

The tank was slowly moved to the back of the huge building where more tanks stood in a row. As it neared the others a small crane came up beside it. It lifted and the trailer moved from underneath it. The crane moved it forward further and it descended to the concrete floor two feet below, settling uniformly in line with the row of similar tanks. Headlights illuminated the dim interior and as the men moved to the door the lights followed revealing more glimpses of the structure.

"It's beer thirty" Tim announced coming toward Laura. Everyone got in pick-ups and drove to the house. She fell in line and at the house she joined them inside.

"It doesn't look so big from the road" Laura observed.

"The winery will look smaller once everything is inside and interior walls go up" Jason replied. "That will be a year from now. There is a lot of other work around here and the vineyard may not make a crop for a couple more years. It's not a rush job."

"How are you going to learn how to make wine?" Laura asked. "I mean, it must be kind of tricky or there wouldn't be good wines and bad wines, would there?"

"Scotty and Quent and maybe some more of us, are going to take a course at the center where Quent worked and do another one at a vineyard in California next fall," Bob responded. "Some of it is laboratory science and the rest is good taste buds and lots of practice."

"If some of it comes out bad, we can make you and Patti a lot of wine coolers" Tim joked. "With all the added flavors all they need to get right is the alcohol content."

"Bob has a still going in, too, to make some into brandy or liquors" Dan added.

"You guys work too much, you need to lighten up and have fun sometimes. Even your play is work" Laura added that because she saw Dan and Tim fishing less often and figured it was work keeping them away from the lake.

The boys cooked burgers on the grill, so there was no gourmet food that night. They came with nuclear potatoes, not fried, freshly microwaved by Jared; his specialty. The light rain slowed to a mist. There was no chill to the air. With the pool lights on, a fog hung over the surface of the water glowing in the illumination. As Laura looked at Johnny turning the patties on the grill, his feet disappeared into the fog and he appeared to float; maybe it was the beer.

The rain was gone the next morning. If any puddles had formed, they had soaked into the dry dirt. The night before, when some of the men began to drift off to their rooms, Laura took the hint and went home herself.

The boys still left early for football practice every morning. Only thirty one students comprised the entire high school student body and all the boys were on the team. The sexes were out of balance before Hayden and Jared enrolled but with eighteen boys now, the thirteen girls were outnumbered. For all of them the experience was closer to private tutoring. There was no worry in the school about the 'no pass, no play' rule. With so much individual attention, even slower students rose to equal advanced students in more populous districts.

Schooldays would fly by. Even homework was done at school most of the time unless it was an English assignment to read a book. Ag class was more standing around than anything, or making some project in the shop.

Some classes were combined between grades. The sciences only repeated every third year and this year the juniors and seniors both took physics together. Math courses advanced faster than the limits imposed by school years and when a grade passed the final, students moved on to the next level. Hayden was stuck with the juniors in calculus, which earned college credit and was above the high school level. The other seniors took an elective during that period.

Four semis had unloaded that day. When the boys got home from school, the last of the big equipment was being set in place. A truck with an equipment trailer was waiting to haul the rented crane away. It wouldn't be needed anymore.

"What should we do today?" asked Shaun. He'd been expecting to be busy working late today the same as the day before. The chickens weren't laying and there weren't many chores to be done either.

"Why don't you four do the cooking again" Johnny suggested, "we had a hard day."

After deciding to make tacos and putting hamburger meat in the microwave to defrost, they needed more tortillas for shells. Tim wanted some Copenhagen and Jason volunteered to ride along just to get away from the house. Sally always kept some things stocked at the Gas'n'Go and tortillas in large packs always sold. Most ingredients used to prepare food in the store were always stocked in quantity. The boys got to the counter with the tortillas just as Jason got his change for the snuff. He slid the tin of Copenhagen in his hip pocket like he used the worm dirt himself. All he missed doing was tapping the can to pack down the contents and peeling back the seal to crack it open.

The boys paid next and got some chips and two liter bottles of soda, different than what was stocked at the house. "Hey fag boys, choking on plenty of dick at the ranch?" a voice boomed behind them.

"Watch your mouth asshole" Haden responded.

"You going to shoot me, too, queer?" the voice came back with a fist flying toward Jason. Jason blocked the punch and planted his own fist in the man's got, leaving him lying on the sidewalk. They got in the truck and drove away. It was one of the framers and from his dress, he wasn't working. If a man's not in work clothes at four in the afternoon, doing construction, he's had the day off.

This was the first time there had been any comments were made to any of the guys. Church, school, and football practice didn't bring any negative comments and at the games nothing was said, at least within earshot. Jason was fuming. The boys remained silent. "We'll all talk about this after supper," Jason said, knowing the incident had to be discussed.

Still pissed, Jason moved straight for the bar inside the den. He grasped a bottle of Irish single malt that must have been a gift at some past time, it had never been opened. He poured the glass an inch deep, Tim approached with a grin and it took him a second to realize what his purpose for the trip had been. He stuck a hand in his hip pocket and offered the can, held between his index and middle finger of his left hand, then returned to filling the glass. One at a time, three ice cubes splashed into the caramel liquid. Between sips he held the glass just beneath his lips as if inhaling an unseen vapor that rose from it.

Tim took a swig and passed the bottle around, then put a pinch in his mouth and shot again putting two balls in pockets on the pool table. "Not bad!" Tim commented on the whiskey. He scanned the table, shot, another ball dropped, and he scanned again. Jason relaxed enough to release his grip on the glass and set it down, still nearly half full.

The boys made quick work of assembling the tacos. Meat, cheese, lettuce and pico de gallo with a bite, went in shells on paper plates lined up down the counter. With all the stomachs filled and the plates discarded, Jason said, "One of the assholes from the framing crew decided to fuck with us up at the store. He took a swing at me and I decked him."

The trial of the contractor was coming soon and where they had escaped attention since the attack, giving testimony would put everyone except the four boys in the spotlight. The contractor had been offered a plea bargain to a misdemeanor charge of failing to report a crime, called misprision of a felony, but declined saying he would never be convicted.

"Why do those guys think Lance and all of us are gay?" Jared asked.

"The guys I worked with training horses kept trying to fix me up with dates and nagging me. I told them I wasn't interested, but they wouldn't let up. I'd only been with a couple of guys in college, but I told them I was gay so they'd leave me alone. First they told my boss and he laughed at them. He suggested they turn queer and they might learn how to train horses. That pissed them off and they told some people at a bar they went to in town. A lot of people know who I am from seeing me at competitions, rodeos, and horse shows. Right after that, I got attacked the first time in town," Lance explained.

"Why would knowing you're gay make them think we all are? I mean, they don't know where anyone sleeps or anything. I don't even know what any of you guys do together. The most I've seen is a kiss once and a while," Brian wondered.

"Why is it any of their business who sleeps with who? No one is telling them who they can or can't sleep with and none of us are bothering them." Johnny was pissed. "I'm not fucking around with any guy that passes by."

"A lot of gay guys act like they would fuck around with anyone. Some won't fuck around with the same guy twice. When you don't want people to know you're gay, it draws less attention if you're around different people all the time. I was guilty of that myself," Jason admitted.

"I've had some friends in town keeping their ears open to see if anyone is talking about the attack or any of us. So far, no one has heard anything. It may change when the trial starts and we need to watch out for each other so none of us gets hurt" Tim informed them.

Although Clavo didn't comment, what might lie ahead was heavy on his mind. He had talked to his bishop several times. Everything that was discussed left it clear he could remain a priest and in his current duties, but some details he left out. His relationship with Bob, he held as a matter between himself and god alone. He had begun to feel he wasn't fit to be a priest. He wanted to help, to serve, to teach, and to comfort, but if his personal life distracted from what he had to do, he would leave the priesthood. .

"I think we should expand the house now," Bob told everyone. "If we close the back into a circle, we can add apartments for everyone. We get along pretty good, but a little more space might help. A retractable cover for the pool would let us use it year round instead of just the whirlpool. The security system here at the house is great. Dad was a paranoid son of a bitch." Bob was just bouncing thought off the men, but there was free time now with the winery at a stopping point. Lance was attacked by surprise twice and changes could prevent it from happening again.

CHAPTER FIFTY EIGHT

A week later an addition was well on its way to completion. Twenty two men can do a lot of work in a day. A week before Halloween they were moving in new furniture. To close the circle, ten apartments filled the gap. They had the comfort of the bedrooms, but included a living area and small kitchen along with two bedrooms instead of just one. Tim was already finished welding sections that would form a retractable roof over the enclosed area. Besides the pool, the space was now double in size.

The bunkhouses were locked up and all the stored food was moved up to the house. Jason had drawn plans that included a recreation space for the exercise equipment and a pantry area with a large walk-in fridge and a freezer the same size. The unused space, both at the ranch and at the laborers center, needed a purpose. None of the options looked practical. Since the closing of the laborers center, everyone involved had offered suggestions ranging from a hotel and restaurant to retail shops. Sally even supported the idea of a restaurant if Scotty's skills would be put to use, but without a major highway going through Desolation the local population could not warrant it.

"We've got all the wagons in a circle, boss," Paul joked to Bob after everyone was settled in. Dog had the most difficulty adjusting to the changed surroundings, but he figured out pretty fast that the enclosed space was considered inside and using a doggie door was easier than scratching to go out or come in. Once the roof was completed the enclosed patio would become the common area and even the house would be private space again, for Bob and Clavo. If changes could bring more privacy and more security, this addition found the best way to achieve both.

Laura and Patti came into the kitchen through the garage, carrying platters of food. "We brought supper," Laura announced. "Sally, Charlie, and Maria are bringing more." She gazed up at Tim as he put the last panels on the roof. "Wow, this is huge." The entire area was concrete like the patio.

Some of the furniture in the bunkhouses had been moved to the house. Four beds and couches were new. The other couches were in good shape and the big tables could hold quite a few people. Patti set the tray she was carrying on one of the long bunkhouse tables. A bar was temporarily set up on the table and she turned to Clint who was standing beside it and said "Fix a lady a drink, cowboy."

Laura set her tray on the table alongside the other one. The area was still mostly a mess. She got a beer from a cooler on the table and watched as Tim checked the rolling section of the roof. He hit a button and one side of the roof moved until it reached the end of a track and stopped. Then he tried the opposite side. The open ceiling was broken by a steel beam at the peak, going down the center of the patio. The area above the pool and around its sides was all that was exposed to the sky. "How are you going to paint what is over the pool?" she asked.

"I just weld. Greater minds can figure that one out," Tim replied. He hit both buttons and the roof closed again. The furniture was in a jumble, pushed back toward the far end where it had been unloaded. One set of doors led to a corridor opining to the outside that a pick-up could drive through.

Tim took a seat on one of the couches in the jumble and got a look from Clint that said " Are we supposed to carry you, too?"

"All this crap will be in the way when I get the basketball goal up" Tim joked. The couches got spread out a little and the two tables were put end to end to make one long table. Painting and running electrical connections still had to be taken care of. The only light would come from the pool, the old patio, and from the surrounding hallway.

Sally, Maria, and Charlie all arrived together. The food everyone brought was snack trays as house warming gifts for the guys since they were probably too busy to cook that day. For the first time, these friends got a tour that included the bedrooms and new apartments. Jason had worked in a couple of other rooms when drawing up the plans. One room held the exercise equipment, another served as a large pantry and had a walk in fridge and freezer, the last was for crafts or projects, all intended to clear out the garage.

"You should fill this space with plants" Maria commented on the now covered patio, "They would bring it to life."

"Having the guys here has already brought the house to life. Since they're all partners in the ranch, I thought they should share in the house, too," Bob commented, not mentioning that it was done more for security than for comfort.

"Have you guys been doing anything for fun or are you still just working all the time?" Laura asked.

"We go to the football games" Scotty answered.

"Ya'll need to do better than that" Sally spoke up. "You haven't even bought any minnows lately."

"My last trip to the store didn't turn out too good," Jason replied. "We've been using lures and worms and doing most of our fishing in the ponds and stock tanks here on the ranch."

"We did some exploring on the rest of the wind farm land, too, but it's too big to get a good look," Dan told them. "Most of it is just untouched desert scrub land. It might take a helicopter or an ultralight to cover much ground."

"Working with the horses isn't really like work. Most ranching jobs you just round up or move the stock. Some even use four wheelers instead of horses. Cutting and roping is rodeo work, more of a sport. I love it," Sye explained. "I'd be doing it in my time off if I had a way."

"We all like it and Lance is teaching us a lot about training the horses, too," Dan confirmed.

"There never has been a lot to do in Desolation. It takes a rare kind of person to be happy out here, but I've had Maria and she's all I've ever needed" Charlie said.

"What about dating? Are any of you meeting any girls?" Laura asked.

"Life ain't perfect," replied Tim. His usual cat ate the canary grin allowed that to be enough of an answer to her question. "Are you meeting any nice guys yet?"

"I've got a couple I'm still deciding about, but most guys are boring as hell or they act like they beat women. I've had enough for three lifetimes of being hit. I'm still looking," Laura explained.

They had brought the big screen TV from the bunkhouse, so they ran an extension cord and put on a movie. The couches had to be moved a little. They snacked and had a few drinks while it played. After the guests had left, Bob brought out coffee makers and coffee for each pair of men, saying "I think we can all have a cup of coffee in the morning without waiting for another pot to finish."

It was only nine and too early for bed even with new quarters to sleep in. Lighting around the perimeter and rising from the water in the pool created a relaxed atmosphere in the patio area. The speakers by the pool carried music through the whole room.

"I do miss the nightlife in Dallas a lot," Jason confided, "but I'm starting to really enjoy living here."

"I hated LA. I was so broke all the time; I couldn't go out much anyway." Scotty reflected.

"If I wanted to get out in the country, I'd have to drive a couple of hours just to get away from sidewalks and traffic lights."

"I miss all the lakes around Dallas and Fort Worth" Hayden remarked. "It's so dry out here. You can't even ski in the lake. It's too small."

"The worst part of living here for me has been being lonely," Lance said. "When I met all of you, my only friends lived quite a ways from here. I got tired of going out to eat alone and talking to horses. The guys I worked with weren't my friends."

"Clint and I became friends the first time we met." James told them. "What was crazy was when we dated a girl, we ended up fighting. I'd be going out with her and Clint would ask her out, too. I did the same thing when he found a date. I got a few black eyes and busted lips and so did he. Cowboys have a hard time figuring things out, but what we were jealous of was anyone who got between us. It's a good thing we found out before we killed each other. We've never had a fight since then."

Johnny Mac was still dealing with his demons. "I grew up hating queers. When I understood that I was gay, it didn't change my feelings, I just hated being gay. I didn't want to be that way. After you end up in bed with several women and no matter what they do you can't get a boner, it's kind of hard to deny you're gay. I beat a guy up real bad one time. I beat up Gary even though I love him. I was drunk, but I was taking my hate for myself out on others and they weren't at fault. I'm still fucked up I guess, but I try not to drink as much."

Johnny's revelation slowed the conversation. It was hard enough to understand hate from strangers. It was harder still to understand self hatred. Gary thought of Donnie and knew that one thing he would never do was to hate himself. He loved life.

The boys were the first to drift to their new beds. There would be practice and school the next morning. Hayden and Shaun shared a bed. Brian and Jared decided to sleep separately since both now had their own beds. After a fitful hour of tossing and turning, Jared joined Brian. "I've gotten used to you lying next to me and I can't get to sleep without you." He moved to snuggle close and Brian said, "me, too."

He turned and they shared a kiss for the first time. It was just a brush of the lips, nothing more. It said 'before we slept together out of convenience, now we sleep together by choice.'

(I will post the last section, chapters 59-63 next week)