Discovering I was bisexual. Copyright Alex Carr
For me my leaning towards homosexuality remained dormant until I was about sixteen. I was so green I didn't understand what sex was all about anyway, I guess I was late in getting the teenage hormones' that changed us from kids to grown ups.
Then it came all at once and being terribly shy of girls, I flushed each time I met a girl I fancied, so it seemed at that time my leanings were plainly heterosexual
The most embarrassing moment of my teenage hood was when my mum caught me masturbating with my newly discovered pleasure shaft, She was so sweet though looking back, she never said a word, just closed my bedroom door behind her apologising from disturbing me. And nothing was ever mentioned about it ever, and I admire her for that because the way I was it could have had quite an effect on my, being ultra sensitive in that area.
When 17 I went to a holiday camp with my brother for a week, While there I
met a guy called Terence and made a good pal of him and we both promised to keep in touch. As far as I was concerned and I believe he too, it was just a normal guy friendship and nothing more and yet, inadvertently it was Terrence who brought to light my tendencies for bi-sexual leanings.
He telephoned me a couple of weeks after the holiday and asked if I would like to spend a weekend with him and his family In Lowestoft, Suffolk so I agreed.
He and his family were staunch roman Catholics and I don't think until this
day he knew about what he did when somehow, because there were no spare beds, his mum asked if I didn't mind sharing with Terence. I didn't think anything of it an agreed.
All was well until the early hours I had a rude awakening. I felt this hard thing poking me at the back and heard Terence grunting which seemed really
odd and bazaar.
I didn't quite know what to do or what he was about but he was definitely asleep and seemed to be dreaming.. I got up, went to the lieu and got back beside him hoping he had settled by that time, he'd rolled over on his side so I snuggled into my pillow and went off again.
Then again later, he was doping it again, he had his hands gripping my thighs and seemed to be trying to get his penis between my bum. I tried to stir
him but without success, he was in a right frenzy and all of a sudden I felt this warm treacly fluid drip down my bum. I moved my right hand behind me and realised I was touching his balls, like a kid doing something wrong I sprung it back again and jumped out of bed making for the bathroom to get myself cleaned up.
Terrance stirred and then he rolled back over again facing away from me and was still absolutely sound. When into the bathroom I realised what had happened, and cleaned his body fluid off my bum and back, decided to sleep the rest of the night out perched on a small bedroom armchair.
The following day we all attended church, being a protestant I did not have
a clue of that they were singing and the like, and Terence never mentioned
anything about what had happened in the night. I honestly believe until this day he had no idea that he had ejaculated over me, he must have been having some dream because he was really enjoying himself at my expense and I think if I hadn't of closed up he would have gotten inside me.
Needless to say I stopped any contact with him, to me he seemed a real weirdo.
I joined the RAF for five years, met a girl and ,married her enjoying a normal heterosexual relationship which I still do despite my bi-sexual activities she does not know about. Because I feel embarrassed to tell her and anyway the last thing I want to do is upset our relationship, sex with her had
faded but I still love her.
Anyway In the RAF I did begin to realise my true leanings when I mad pals with Bernard, and we just took to each other like peas in a pod and one night I did jump into bed with him, it was a bit dodge because we were in a billet where there were ten other guys sleeping in separate beds but at the time the urge overtook my common sense and there I was behind him, feeling his cock and balls and vice versa - I remember it was lovely and so nice, his cock was warm and inviting to touch and I simply loved the way he masturbated me. "Want to go the whole hog, Pete?" he said to me, meaning for us both to cum. "Use your handkerchief" he said and I will use mine on you and I realised then all, he wanted to do was for us both to wank each other off.
That was my first true time with a guy and kit suddenly occurred to me that
indeed I was bisexual. When I was demobbed I even had an affair with a girl and it was lovely, I can still remember her `thing' what turned her on pre-intercourse, she bent over on all fours across my lap on the settee, me probing under her skirt and finding her virginity. She kept saying "Round and round, do it round and round" and it was lovely, she soon got very wet and frenzied, asking for my deep fuck, I gave it to her from behind over the edge of the settee and it was lovely.
We saw each other for a year afterwards having a thoroughly good time until
somehow it fizzled out. Somehow then I got around to delving into my bisexual tendencies and when my wife was out working, I was on night work) I started to experiment with the idea of inserting things into my anus, going back to the time I slept with Terrence and wishing I had let hi do it to me using a screwdriver with a bulbous handle was a thrill I remember, with plenty of Vaseline to lubricate I started to realise it would go in very deep and the shape of the ha ndle gave me a thrill as I lunged it in and out of me, laying on my side, one leg up and looking into a mirror getting very horn indeed watching my anus being stretched like that.
I tried other things too like a broom handle and candles and things, but the trouble was they kept slipping out just as the going was getting good so I reverted to the screwdriver with the bulbous handle which prevented it slipping out on its own accord unless I really pushed and eased it out of me which was very nice.
Using a bigger version of the bulbous screwdriver I soon found I was able to reach a gratifying climax, And I discovered also that by walking around the house with it still stuck inside me gave me all sorts of wonderful vibrations and sensual feelings - but the yearning for a real cock inside me became overwhelming and I knew I had to find myself a participating guy who I could really have fun with. But how could I find a guy, there are loots of them out there but trying to find a way of introduction was difficult without dropping to the seedy practice of hanging around toilets in hope you may find a compatible guy that doesn't just want a quick wank in a toilet cubicle,
Anyway I got myself a computer and frequented the gay and bisexual chat room in my effort to find a guy.
Then I learned all about promises, promises which didn't materialise - when after having shared a fairly sexual conversation with someone, discovered they were like you and maybe lived nearby - most wer4e only doing it for kicks with no aim whatsoever of keeping to an arranged meet. I started to et despondent, my fantasies were lurid and I had to be careful my wife didn't realise what I was up to.
But what do they say about those who keep trying will have success in the end. Dan was on one day, he lived only five miles down the road, he seemed a nice guy and we did arrange a meeting in the supermarket car park here in Teignmouth. He gave me his scar plate number and I stood there thinking for all
the world this was just another hoax and he wouldn't turn up.
But he did - he did - gave me a wonderful welcoming smile, opened the passenger door and asked me to clamber in. The car park was almost empty, we chatted for a while, got a little more acquainted, like me he was Bi and had been divorced, but was looking like me for a compatible guy and was happy withy the idea of me being older than he by fifteen years..
I felt the need not to hang about but to show him why I was there, lowering
my left hand across my lap to reach his crutch. HE made non move to stop me so happily I started to feel him over his jeans. He closed his eyes and commented that is was so nice, it was for me too, At last I had found another guy like me and as I unzipped him it was as if by instinct I had a natural urge to slip my hand inside his briefs and cradle his tackle, slightly squeezing and realising he was soon in full erection seeing it bulge beneath his briefs.
At last here he was, the guy I had longed to share with all my fantasies, to make them come true, I pulled him out slowly at first, over the waist of his briefs, he moved slightly to assist me pull down his jeans and briefs just enough for me to get a good access.
He was anxious though because we were in a public place so I told him of a place I knew in a country lane where we would be out of sight, so that we could really enjoy each other.
All the way, as I directed him where to drive, I was feeling and squeezing his lovely cock, just longing to do other things but knowing I would have to be patient else I may put him off his driving. When we got to our secluded spot I was real hard too and to show willing I masturbated myself in full view - he soon stripped, we went to the back of the car and what followed was the best thing for me since my first time with my wife only different, this was another guy with cock and balls like me and there was an awful lot of catching up to do.
He smelled good too, his scent immediately turned me on, lured me to taste him, to suck and to lick him that's how it was, and he did me too. The sensation was so wonderful and so natural which made it seem ever better for the both of us indulging in the wonderfully new and exciting venture. He said would I like for him to fuck me, that he had plenty of lubricant, just in case he said with a smirk on his face. If only he knew just how good that made me feel, at last I was going to feel what it was like to have a real cock inside me and not a poor substitute like a screwdriver handle which I had told Dan about, he was quite happy he said to be the giver, that he wanted to taken me, he liked the look of me, he bent down and I felt his hands beautifully exploring me, and then what must shave been his tongue licking it between my stretched bum cheeks, it was all magic,
"Tell you what, Pete, let's get out so we can really enjoy each other, it is so quiet here and only the sheep will see."
I wanted that, he stood there outside the car his huge cock standing to attention like a guardsman, I could see it throb and I longed for his fuck, I kneeled awhile and took him into my mouth again, this t9ome having the room to beautifully balls and suck him, he stood there swaying from side to side as I did so, he tasted like heaven, like sea salt, his pungency so good, I took him as deep as I could until he stopped me saying he could not hold on much longer, that he was my fuck. I spread myself on the grass nice and wide and open for him, pushing my bum upwards as high as I could ton receive his fuck.
I closed my eyes and waited for his entry, now I would soon know what it was like in reality, at first I thought he wouldn't find me, he seemed to be prodding me a little too high up, my memories of Terence flashed back but this time I wasn't going to stop it, I felt his cock find me beautifully, squeeze into me, stretching and opening me to the full and it was so nice, better than any broomstick or screwdriver handle!
As the fuck progressed I hear the sound of his pants grow, his moans and his grunts, his fucking grew more and more rapid and I was going with him, wanting as much as he could give, pushing my hand around to feel just how deep he was inside, he was full penetration and in my mind the thought of that
scrumptious cock I had just sucked with ardour, the taste of him still my mouth, he pounding it into me for that finale, the final thrust feeling his stream inside me, both of us rolling over the grass like teenagers - it was divine and at last my leaning had been realised,
I felt so good the next following days and also it was going to be an ongoing thing, Dan and I are meeting regularly finding an opportune time when my wife is out. My life has never been so good as now ...