Disfellowshipped Love 1
Disclaimer: The following is a work of fiction any similarities to real people alive or dead and any events are coincidental only. This story is the creation of the author and is written from the author's point of view of the organization spoken of there-in and is not to be taken as a typical representation of that organization. This work may contain topics or events that some readers may find offensive by continuing beyond this point you accept responsibly for any offense that you may take and will not hold the author responsible for such offense. Do not continue if the reading of this material is an offense in your locality. This story may also contain graphic depictions of sexual acts between two consenting adult males. You have been warned. This work is the sole property of the author and should not be reproduced in any way, shape, or form without written consent of the author.
Disfellowshipped Love Chapter 1: Life's New Beginning
All life is fluid and in a constant state of change; things never stay the same forever no matter how hard we try to make them. It took me awhile to accept that, but in the end I think it is for the better that they do change. Being kicked out of my parents house, losing my best friend and first love, and facing the Elders of the Jehovah's Witnesses congregation, are all things that I thought would be bad. I know now that I did have fear and that I carried it around with me all the time. I had feared the change that I knew was on the horizon and that I fought so hard to keep from happening. However when I made a choice to face that fear and allow things to change it really was for the better.
In the six months that followed my coming to Chad's door and kissed him, declaring my love for him. I can't say that the past six months have been all that easy, in fact they have been hard. There have been times of great pain when all I could do was collapse into a ball on the floor and cry. There have been times when I felt like giving up and allowing the pain to take possession of me, carrying me away from here. However despite the pain there have been times that have filled me with such joy and hope. I can honestly say that those happy times were because of Chad.
I don't know what I would have done without Chad, he has been my rock. I have never known in my life anyone that could make me feel so deep, so safe, and so happy. Chad has taught me what true love is, that it's not based on how many hours you put in the door-to-door work, or in how much you give to the congregation. He has shown me that love is based on the person that you are on the inside, and not on the person that people think you are. He has shown me that love truly can be unconditional.
"Sweety time to wake up," came the soft tender voice of Chad as he kissed the top of my head.
"I have been awake for awhile, I'm just listening to your heart beat," I said as a smile crossed my face and my eyes cracked open. "You're right though, it is time to wake up."
"We have lots to do before the movers get here," he said as I lifted my head off his chest and kissed his soft sweet lips. Most people, I have been told, have bad breath in the morning but Chad always tastes so sweet in the morning, like strawberries.
Chad was right though we had lots to do and very little time to do it in. While Chad's apartment was nice, it was really small, and we had been looking for something with some more square footage. With the number of people moving to Calgary we were worried that we wouldn't find anything, especially in our price range, but we lucked out. We found this great apartment that wasn't much more than what we were paying now but with a lot more space. The part I loved was the fireplace in the living room, I couldn't wait to fire it up, and cuddle in front of it.
"How long do we have?" I asked slowly getting out of bed.
"The movers will be here in three hours and Stacy will stop by with the key and the final papers to sign in two," he said.
"So I guess that rules out a quickie?" I said making a pouty face in his direction.
"Well we have to shower, right?" he said with an almost wicked grin on his face before he ran to the bathroom with me not far behind.
As the water warmed behind us in the shower, I pulled Chad toward me and held him in my arms. I could feel the warmth of his skin and the beating of his heart on my chest. As I looked into his eyes I couldn't imagine anything more perfect than standing there, holding the man that I loved more than life itself. As I moved in closer to his lips, I could feel his warm breath as it greeted me, urging me forward. Our lips met ever so softly at first allowing me the opportunity to feel their velvety soft texture and lose myself in the moment.
"I love you so much, I didn't think it was possible but I love you more now than yesterday, and I think I will love you even more tomorrow," I said temporarily breaking the kiss. He just sighed as he leaned in pulling me into another kiss.
I could feel the warmth of the steam coming from the shower as it filled the room. I guided my love under the warm water allowing it to cascade over him, bringing goose bumps to his skin as it adjusted to the temperature. I watched as he broke the kiss and closed his eyes, as the water rushed over his face tracing out the soft and subtly sensual lines of his perfect skin. I reached out and followed its path with my hand down the whole of his chest, feeling his body relax into the warmth of the shower, before moving under the water myself to kiss him again.
The water rushed over us, between us, and around us warming and intensifying our touch as we continued to kiss. I could feel his hands as they lovingly explored my body tracing the contours of my shoulder blades down to the small or my back and tickling the sensitive skin of my behind. I kneaded the soft flesh of his back as his kisses become more intense and deeper. I could feel the need to be closer to him build up inside of me as I kissed down his jaw line to the nape of his neck. He released a small moan as I nibbled on his collarbone and he ran his fingers through my now wet hair.
"I love you," was all I heard before I allowed my passion to take over.
We stayed in the shower much longer than we should have using up all the hot water. And we were now rushed getting the last of the packing done before the movers came. It was worth the extra work, and I sincerely hope we would wake up every morning doing a repeat performance. As I packed boxes, I couldn't help but smile and blush anytime he looked in my direction. It was amazing how he made me feel. Don't get me wrong, this wasn't the first time that we had sex, but it seemed that every time with him was special, a precious gift that needed to be fully appreciated. Each time that our eyes locked or our lips met, I could feel myself falling more and more in love with him.
As our eyes met I was overcome with a need to tell him I loved him for about the fiftieth time this morning and just as I was about to I was interrupted by a knock at the door. As I got up to answer I mouthed the words `I love you' to him. "Hey Stacy!" I said to the young woman standing behind the door. Stacy was one of Chad's oldest friends, they had known each other since kindergarten. Stacy is what you would call a `tiny terror', she was on the shorter side but yet, you knew not to mess with her. That said, there isn't anyone I know who is more generous and sweet, well except maybe Chad, but I'm not exactly impartial in that area. She was kind enough to help us find our new apartment. Her uncle owned the apartment that we were moving into and she had not only managed to get it for us, but had convinced him to keep the rent low for us. "Thanks for helping out Stacy you're a life saver," I said as she passed.
"It was no problem really," she said sweeping her long red hair out of her eyes. "It looks like you guys are behind in your packing here. Why don't you two go over the papers while I do some packing," she said handing me a stack of papers. I was amazed at how much you have to sign when moving into an apartment. It kind of feels like you are signing your life over to someone else. "Men," Stacy suddenly said looking into one of the boxes that I was working on. "None of you know how to pack properly."
"Well then I guess we just needed a woman's touch," I said chuckling as she unpacked the box rearranging it.
"Damn right and don't you forget it," she said laughing.
"Like you would let us," I said sticking my tongue out at her. As I looked through the papers, it was pretty standard stuff. Most of it was information packages on garbage removal, tenant responsibilities, services, and other stuff like that. There was also the final paper that said we were taking possession today, which I quickly signed and handed to Chad. We had decided to take the apartment in both our names, instead of just one, it was going to be our place not just mine or Chad's. "Is there anything else that we need to do today?" I asked Stacy as Chad added his signature.
"No that should be all, my Uncle got your deposit and I brought you the keys so other than moving in there is nothing to worry about," she said as she taped up the box that she had been working on and started in on another. "You guys really are behind here though, what has been taking you guys so long, did you sleep in or something?" As she looked at me waiting for the answer, I couldn't help but blush and look away. "You guys are too much," she said knowing what had kept us busy. "I better find myself a man soon so I can show you what I have to put up with."
"You know you love us," Chad said as he walked over to Stacy and knelt down beside her kissing her cheek. "What ever happened to what's his name, the construction worker guy?"
"Derek," she said with a slightly angry look on her face. "That asshole was more interested in his secretary than me. I found them making out in his office the other day."
"Oh man I'm sorry Stacy you deserve better," I said kneeling down with Chad next to Stacy.
"It's ok, he gets what he deserves, that bitch is sleeping with his boss anyway." She said slightly laughing. "It was for the better anyway, but learning the truth now rather than later," she said soberly as the tears in her eyes began to well up.
"Why don't you two finish up the packing in the bed room and I will finish out here," I said standing. I knew that right now she needed her best friend and that it was better for them to be alone.
"Good lord, you're not done in there yet either," she said getting up heading to the bedroom as she tried to put on a brave face.
"Well like you said us men don't know how to pack," Chad said as he came over to me and gave me a quick kiss on the lips mouthing the words `thank you' so that I was the only one who could see it.
As they talked, I worked at getting the last of the living room organized for the movers. There was a lot to do but I managed to get the last box packed just as the movers arrived. I hope that they were close to done in the bedroom, but knew better than to disturb them before I needed to. So I set to work on organizing them to clear out the living room and kitchen, leaving the bedroom for the very last. As the living room was clearing out, I carefully knocked on the bedroom door.
"Everything ok in there?" I called. I really wished that I could give them more time but the longer we held up the movers the more it would cost us. "Can I come in?"
The door opened and Stacy came out and gave me a long hug. "Thank you for letting me borrow your boyfriend, especially today," Stacy said as she held on to me.
"We love you Stacy," I said as I held her back. "We really need to get the stuff from here out though or you could keep him longer."
"I might have to take you up on that offer," she said letting me go as she wiped away a tear.
"Any time," I said handing her the box of Kleenex that I was holding.
"What the heck, that box goes last" Stacy commanded as she went into the living room. I had to keep from laughing at how quickly she could flip from teary and vulnerable to her bossy mode.
"Is she going to be ok?" I asked Chad as he came up and put his arms around my waist.
"She is going to be fine," he said lightly kissing my lips. "I only have a few things to pack up in here why don't you help me and let Stacy whip the movers."
"What? And scare them away?" I said faking concern.
"I'm sure they will be fine; besides, if you are in there you might get caught in her cross hairs," Chad said just loud enough for Stacy to hear him.
"I'll get you for that later," she yelled at him as she directed the movers on how to get the couch out. She really was the take charge and commanding type, which worked for me because then I didn't have to do it.
With Stacy taking charge with the movers and Chad and I finishing the last of the packing we were out of the apartment in no time at all. The moving truck was much slower in traffic than Chad and I, which worked well for us getting there before they did. As I stood and looked at the door of our new apartment, I couldn't help but feel that this moment was special. It wasn't just any new apartment; it was our first apartment together. This was our place, our home, and I wanted to remember this moment as the beginning of many happy memories here.
"Why don't I carry you across the threshold?" I asked Chad as he unlocked the apartment door. "It could be romantic."
"Yes it could be, assuming you don't break your back" he said chuckling. "Carry me big boy," he said jumping up into my arms. As I carried him across the threshold of the apartment, he started kissing my lips slowly at first then with more intensity. "Welcome to your new home."
It really was my home, a place that was mine and the beginning of a new life for me and Chad, the next chapter. It was an adventure that I really didn't think I would ever be able to have, to call my own. Here I was though, standing in my home with the man that I loved. Free from the oppression and control that I felt when I was living with my parents, and the guilt and pain that came with wanting this life and being a Jehovah's Witness. A tear ran down my face as I kissed Chad finally free.
Moving in didn't take long with Master Stacy cracking the whip on the workers. Everything was in and about half of it was put away by the time that Stacy went home. I was just happy that we had the bed set up again. I was no stranger to hard work but after today all I wanted to do was lay in bed for a week of sleep. Fortunately, Chad seemed to agree as he crawled into bed and cuddled up close.
"It was a good day my love," Chad said as he lightly kissed my neck.
"Yes it was," I replied with a sigh enjoying his light kisses.
"I've been thinking though," he said with hesitation in his voice. I have never heard him sound like that before and it made me nervous. "I think you should call your parents."
"What?" I said quickly sitting up with confusion and a hint of anger in my voice. "Why would I do that they made it perfectly clear how they feel?" I didn't intend to sound so angry at him but the feelings that thinking about them were overwhelming me. They had thrown me out and had done it so coldly; why should I be the one to reach out when I didn't do anything wrong?
"Just think about it, Grayson" he said sitting up rubbing my back. "I know that they hurt you really bad, but they are still your family, and if they are ever going to accept you, you have to show them that you are still you."
"They will never accept me Chad, they can't see past their faith and they never will." I could feel the tears welling up, but I held back they were not going to get any more tears from me.
"You don't know that" he said looking rueful. "I just thought that maybe you should at least think about it. At the very least to tell them where you live now."
"Ok I'll think about it but I'm not promising anything," I said still feeling very tense and upset. Chad must have sensed this because he pulled me down in front of him and held me tight.
"Whatever you decide to do just remember that I am here for you and I'm always on your side," he said kissing the back of my neck. "I love you and no matter what happens that is all that matters."
I closed my eyes and just felt his soft lips as they moved down my neck to my shoulder. As he did I could feel all my anger and tension melt away with each kiss. Chad's hand moved up inside my shirt and began to slowly pull it up as he massaged my chest. As he rolled me onto my back, I lifted my arms up so he could pull my shirt off. Once free from the confines of my shirt he placed small butterfly kisses down the center of my chest causing me to shiver. Ours eyes met and I was about to tell him how much I loved him when he stuck his tongue out and ran it from my belly button to the base of my neck, which turned my words into moans of pleasure. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as our lips met sending through my body a shiver of pleasure. I will never get tired of that feeling. The entire world becomes nothing and all that exists is the two of us in a perfect moment in time.
I became cold and lonely as he broke the kiss to remove his own shirt. I needed to feel his lips, the weight of his body on mine, the taste of his skin, and the passion of his touch. I reached out and ran my hand on his chest feeling the warmth of his skin the smooth contours of his abs, trying to encourage him to return. When he did, I allowed a small sigh of satisfaction to escape me, which added to his passion making him deepen our kiss. I moved from his lips and kissed down his neck. As I did, I could feel the heat building up inside of him and the taste of sweat that our passion had generated. Goose bumps appeared in the wake of his hand as it glided down my arm and on my chest as he searched for the waistband of my jeans. He allowed a finger to slip inside my jeans making me gasp at the touch. My mind began to reel as his hand slipped in further running over top of my boxer briefs. In that moment, a new feeling was born inside of me, a craving that came from deep inside, to become one with him.
"I need you inside me," my voice was low and raspy with an almost primal quality to it. "I need you so bad."
Breaking the kiss, he looked me deep in the eyes. I could feel him grow tense as his brow crinkled with worry. "Are you sure?" he asked almost whispering as he tried to catch his breath. "You have never done that before, and I don't want to hurt you."
Reaching up I kissed his forehead. "I'm sure," I said as I kissed his eyes and down the bridge of his nose. "I really need to feel more of you to be closer to you now."
"Ok" he said getting off of me and heading over to a box that hadn't been unpacked. As he searched through the box, I took the opportunity to shed the remainders of my clothes. Finding a condom and a tube of lube in the box, he returned to the bed placing the items on the night stand. "Are you really sure about this?"
"Yes I'm sure," I said reaching up kissing his cheek. Chad looked really nervous he didn't want to hurt me and I loved him for it. Needing to reassure him, I kissed his lips deeply while looking into his eyes so he could see my resolve. "It's ok my love, I know it will hurt a little but I trust you and know you will be gentle."
Chad started kissing me softly while gently pushing me back till I was again lying down on the bed. Pulling away from my lips, he began to slowly kiss his way down my chin and neck till he reached my chest. I could feel his warm breath between kisses making me almost shiver from the intensity of the feeling. Every touch, every kiss was deliberately and carefully placed. He knew all the spots on my body that made me hum with pleasure; he had become an expert at playing my body. I could barely think as the pleasure in my body took over, but I was of the presence of mind to hear the condom wrapper being opened. I knew what was coming, I wanted it badly, but at the same time, I was nervous. Chad must have sensed this because he broke from his activities on my chest to kiss me deeply as he opened the tube of lube.
His lips always had the same effect on me, they always calmed me down, and this time was no difference. As he kissed my lips, I didn't even flinch when I left his finger begin to rub at my entrance. With the small amount of lube that he had placed on his finger it slipped in easily making me break the kiss we were sharing to let loose a moan. I had never before in my life felt anything so intense, so all consuming in its pleasure, and as his finger moved in more all I could do was gasp.
With each movement Chad opened me up more, taking his time to make sure I was completely ready to make our bodies become one, completely relaxed. The whole time his lips never moved far from mine, any time he felt me tense up, his kisses would intensify till I again relaxed. While still kissing my lips he rolled the condom on slowly and moved into position behind me. "You ready?" he asked his voice raspy and heavy. All I could manage to do was nodded and kiss him again as he lifted my legs up.
Sitting up he positioned himself at my entrance and applied a slight pressure till the head entered me. I took a sharp breath at this new feeling, not out of pain, but rather the intensity of this newness of this never before experienced sensation. Very slowly, he moved forward filling me till we completely became one. There were moments of pain but they never lasted long, and they were offset by moments of intense pleasure that I have never experienced before. As he began to enter a rhythmic thrusting motion his lips again returned to mine, making me feel even more close to him. With each passing second, each beat of my heart, each thrust of his manhood, we become closer and closer. I could almost hear his thoughts, the intensity of his feelings, and his unwavering love for me. Our kisses became more intense as the feeling of absolute pleasure built between us.
The sweet smell of sweat and the sound of pleasurable moans filled our bedroom as we came closer and closer to our mutual orgasms. I could feel him slow slightly and his breath become labored as his orgasm overtook him. Then with one last hard thrust into me, his whole body began to convulse in pleasure. As his eyes rolled into the back of his head and his mind was lost in the pleasure, his manhood twitched inside of me, bringing me to the brink. As Chad's thought returned from orgasmic bliss he reached down and took a hold of my hard dick and began to stroke it till I was sent into the most intense orgasm of my life. Flashes of color pasted my eyes as they fluttered into the back of my head and I became disconnect from the world itself all I could feel and know was the pleasure that was surging through my body.
As I came back to reality, I could feel Chad lying on top of me, his breath had returned to a calm state, and he was holding me tight in his arms. I truly felt like we were one in that moment, that everything that I had been through in my life was worth it, just to be in this moment. I felt my love for him grow even more than I thought possible and I looked forward to spending my life with him.
"That was intense," Chad said as he lifted off me to look into my eyes. "I have never felt anything like that before. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed sex before, but with you it is so much more." I couldn't help but blush as he talked. Reaching up I kissed him softly.
"I love you so much" was all I said as I pulled him down beside me and snuggled in close to his body.
"I love you too" he said and kissed my forehead. We both fell asleep quickly in each other's arms.
The next day we were like kids in a candy store. Touching, kissing, and taking every opportunity to just look into each other's eyes while trying to put things away. If anyone had been in the apartment with us, we probably would have made them sick the way we were acting. We did talk some about what we had done the night before; Chad was worried that I might have after morning guilt, but I couldn't have felt better about what we had done. Although my ass did feel a little uncomfortable, like it was missing something.
Opening one box, I found a few pictures of my parents and me standing in front of the kingdom hall. We had been happy that day, and it brought back a lot of good memories for me and for a brief moment I wished that I could go back to them. As I looked up from the picture to Chad's smiling face, I felt guilty for feeling that. Like wanting to be with my parents was a betrayal of my new and happy life with him. I felt a tear escape me and run down my cheek, as I looked back at the picture. All the happiness that I was feeling from before began to fade as I looked at the picture. Sadness and anger began to replace it. They had abandoned me and just when I thought that I was moving on, all it took was one look at them to bring it all back. My knees began to grow weak and I slumped down to the floor and began to weep.
As the tears filled my eyes, I could feel Chad as he wrapped his arms around me holding me tight to his body. "Are you ok Grayson? What is wrong? What happened?" Chad's questions came flooding out but I didn't have the power to answer him. All I could do was cry, to let all the pent up emotions that had been building boil over. I hadn't even realized that I was holding so much in, until looking at the picture released it all at once. I don't even know how long Chad and I sat on the floor while I cried. I do know that at some point Chad took the picture from me and after looking at it he didn't ask any more questions, he just held me. At some point Chad helped me up and back to the bedroom, which I was grateful for; with all the crying I was exhausted and fell asleep as soon as I was in bed.
Author Notes: To all my readers I want each of you to thank Bondwriter for his hard work in editing this chapter; it wouldn't make sense without his hard work. I would also like to give a special thanks to all those at the A Common Bond for their constant support to me. They are a very special group of very brave people that each deserves nothing but the best. If you like this story please e-mail me at jdu82@hotmail.com and let me know.