This is a story of male on male love between two teenage boys. If you're not supposed to be reading this due to age, or it being illegal in your state or country, please leave now. Thanks, and enjoy! Feel free to email me any questions or comments!
The next day I didn't want to go to first block, I just couldn't face Kayden again. I didn't want to see the boy that I'd come to crush on. Did I really just say that, crush on? It'd only been one freaking day! I can't believe I already have a crush on him. And he has my drawing still; oh god I can only believe what he's thinking or done with it. As I walked into first block I was surprised to see that he was already there and that the drawing was sitting on my desk with a note written on it.
"IM sorry for taking your drawing. I didn't mean to steal it. Also, I really meant what I said, I really like your drawing. I'll leave you alone from now on." I couldn't believe it. I got the drawing back and he was apologizing. Why would he be apologizing to me? I'm just the schools local fag. I somehow got the courage to walk over and tap his shoulder.
"It's okay..." I said, and he looked up. He looked so tired, and he looked so afraid. Why would he be afraid of me?
"I swear I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to make you upset or to take your drawing. I'm just new here and trying to make some friends. Not that I'm starting of well." He looked back down and I could see his shoulders shaking.
"Hey its okay, how about this? Grab your bag and we'll skip Gunther's class today. No need to sit here when you're upset and you were here so early; she isn't even here yet. What do you say?" I was hoping he'd say yes. He looked like he needed a day off even if it was only this second day.
"Okay I guess." And we were off. We walked down to the creek behind my school. See my school thinks we're good kids. So we don't have any of those stupid in-school truancy officers. So we'd be good for first block as long as no science classes came down.
"Hey Kayden, I have something to tell you before we even begin to talk." This was it, I'd know if he wanted to even look at me again after this.
"Okay, what?" he looked so thoughtful, I just didn't want to ruin it for us. But I don't want to be friends with a homophobe.
"I'm...i.iii.." I just couldn't not yet. But I have to.
"It's okay I'm not going to judge you I promise." He sounded so sincere. All right this is it.
"I'm gay." There I said it. But I couldn't look at him. I've always heard people act okay with you to find out you're gay. Than they run and tell everyone.
"That's cool. No problem man." Did he just say no problem? Oh my god! He did!
"You really don't care? I mean, you're not going to go run and tell people, not that everyone doesn't know already." I couldn't believe this; he really wasn't going to hit me or anything.
"No I don't care. But I'm not gay." There's the catch. After hearing that I just sat there. I couldn't look at him. I'd done it again. I developed a crush on a straight guy. Why me, why fucking me?
"That's cool. I promise I won't hit on you! Heh." Oh but I wanted to hit on him so badly, but now I guess I can't. Why does this always happen to me. I find a boy, and he ends up not being gay or something. It always happens. It just sucks. I don't get it.
"Ha. Thanks, but I think we should be getting back to school." With that we went back to school. The day went on as usual with nothing exciting. It definitely wasn't a great day. I mean I found out the guy I like isn't gay. Would you call that a good day?
Beep, beep, beep. "Fucking hell!" I couldn't believe I was getting up this early. After yesterday I felt that I had to go to school early and try to reconcile with Matt. I just couldn't loose, not just yet. So I figured I'd go to school and just wait till he showed up, explain and give back his drawing. Although I wanted to keep it; so I ran and made a copy for myself really quickly. What he doesn't know won't hurt him! Heh.
So after I showered and stuff, I got in my car and went to school. God, I was so early. Even the teachers weren't here yet. Luckily, though the doors were open. So I slipped right in and went straight to my class. I figured since I was so early, I'd get some more sleep. I woke up to the door opening and Matt standing there and looking at me.
"I'm sorry for taking your drawing. I didn't mean to steal it. Also, I really meant what I said, I really like your drawing. I'll leave you alone from now on." I blurted all of that out in like five seconds. I didn't even stop to breathe. I just wanted to apologize
"It's okay..." he said, and I looked up. He looked as if he didn't know what to say.
"I swear I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to make you upset or to take your drawing. I'm just new here and trying to make some friends. Not that I'm starting of well." I just couldn't stop myself, I started crying. I didn't know what else to say to him.
"Hey its okay, how about this? Grab your bag and we'll skip Gunther's class today. No need to sit here when you're upset and you were here so early; she isn't even here yet. What do you say?" what the hell. I mean it's my second day, and I don't really give a fuck. If I get in trouble, it's not like I haven't been before.
"Okay I guess." And we were off.
"Hey Kayden, I have something to tell you before we even begin to talk." Oh god. What else could go wrong with this boy?
"Okay, what?" I couldn't help but wonder what he was going to say. Could it be what I'm hoping for? But if it is, what do I do? I'm not out yet, my mom doesn't know, she'd kill me if she knew!
"I'm...i.iii.." he kept stuttering. Come on already, spit it out!
"It's okay I'm not going to judge you I promise.." the poor kid looked a wreck. I had to help him out somehow. I mean if it's what I think it is. I'd be doing the same thing, or worse running away.
"I'm gay." He said it! He's really gay. Oh my god! I can't believe this. It's like a dream. The cutest boy ever just told me he's gay. Oh god, what do I do now?
"That's cool. No problem man." I can't believe that's all I can say after what he just told me. No problem?
"You really don't care? I mean, you're not going to go run and tell people, not that everyone doesn't know already." Was it so hard to believe I didn't want to hurt him? All I wanted to do was wrap him in my arms and never let go, but the world's never that easy. Never.
"No I don't care. But I'm not gay." I can't believe I just told him that. Why am I lying? Could it really hurt to tell him the truth? All he want's is someone like I do. Come on Kayden, tell him!
"That's cool. I promise I won't hit on you! Heh." Oh but I want you to hit on me. That's the problem. Why does this always happen. I have to be so fucking scared that I can't even tell a boy that I like him. Like him? I practically love him. But I don't see how. I've known him for two days! How can I love someone so fast, is it really possible?
"Ha. Thanks, but I think we should be getting back to school..." that's all I can say? I really am pathetic.
Afterwards my day went by. I just couldn't believe I threw away a chance like that...I really am stupid.