Every Little Thing You Do 4 Pairing Shane/Nicky Mark/Kian
Usual disclaimers apply, I don't know Westlife or their sexualities....all 100% Fiction. If you're not supposed to read this then leave...otherwise enjoy
Nicky sighed as he sat alone at the breakfast table. He wondered what Mark's reaction would be. Pleasant he hoped, like Bryan and Kian's was. His thoughts drifted to Shane, the way he left got to him. He didn't know what he could do to show him that he loved him. Sitting here isn't doing anything. He thought. He stood up and made his way upstairs to his room. He expected Shane to be there, but the room was empty. He sat on the bed and thought over his options. Tell Shane how he feels and risk getting hurt, or just carry on the way he has being. He felt like the friendship was dying before his eyes. I have to tell him. He thought
Shane eventually stopped crying. "I'm okay Bry" He said as Bryan comforted him. He wasn't convinced, his eyes seemed listless. "I'm going back to my room Bry" Shane stood up and walked to the door "Shane.....you gonna be okay?" Shane turned around and smiled sadly "Don't worry about me, I'll cope" He left the room and leaned against the wall, letting more tears fall. Bryan sighed. He didn't know what to do. He wanted Shane to know of Nicky's feelings, but at the same time he couldn't betray a friend's trust. He didn't think Nicky would appreciate it
Nicky was fed up of waiting around, he opened the door and walked down the corridor. Shane never even noticed him, he was too busy crying. Nicky however noticed that Shane was visibly upset and he ran over to him "Shane" He panted "What's wrong?" Shane heard the worry in Nicky's voice and looked up "It's nothing Nicky" "Don't tell me nothing. You're upset, who's got to you this way?" Shane wanted to say 'you' but he couldn't as he looked into his warm blue eyes, he hated the fact that he couldn't tear his gaze away. Nicky put aside his worries and pulled him into a loving embrace. Shane instantly felt relief at being in Nicky's arms, and clung onto him, as more tears rolled down his face, making Nicky's neck damp with tears. Nicky closed his eyes as Shane held onto him tightly. He ran his hands up and down Shane's back, wanting to take his tears and shield him from pain. It made his heart break over and over again at every tear Shane shed. Nicky pulled away and smiled "Come on" He took Shane's hand and squeezed it. Shane swallowed a lump that appeared in his throat and gazed down at their hands. Nicky led him back to their room.
Mark pushed Kian away suddenly, making Kian look down at him in surprise. "What's wrong?" He asked softly "We can't do this." He sat up, pulling his knees to his chin "Why not?" Kian trailed his fingers down Mark's spine "Don't you like me?" He whispered, making Mark tremble, he turned to face Kian and smiled "Of course I like you, but...." "But what?" Kian was having trouble understanding just where Mark was going with this "Kian, you are not.....you're not....I've seen you with girls....so why?" "Mark, do you think I could have kissed you like that if I only liked girls? Do you think this would happen if I only liked girls?" He took Mark's hand and pressed it against his crotch. Mark gasped at what he felt, he looked into Kian's eyes and saw the desire shining back at him. Kian let go of Mark's hand and closed his eyes as Mark kept his hand there, pressing down gently on his crotch. Kian parted his lips and let out a soft moan as Mark slowly edged the zip down. "You okay with this Ki?" Mark asked softly, taking his hand away from Kian's crotch. Kian grabbed his hand and replaced it back on his crotch "More than okay Mark, don't stop" He pleaded and laid back on the bed, he breathed a sigh of relief as he felt Mark's hands on him again
"What's wrong Shane?" Nicky sat beside Shane on the bed and noticed that Shane moved away. Nicky sighed "It's me isn't it?" Shane looked him in the eye and tried to smile "What do you mean?" "You have a problem with something, that something is me?" "I don't have a problem with you.....I never could...." He stopped suddenly and turned away "Do you like me Shane?" Nicky asked softly. Shane smiled "You know I do. We are best friends" "You know what I mean Shane" He reached for his hand and Shane pulled away quickly. Nicky sighed and stood up "I guess that's a no then" Shane heard the sorrow in his voice and wondered if Nicky was being upfront with him, or just teasing him "It's a yes Nicky" Nicky turned to him and dropped to his knees "What are you saying Shane?" "Nothing Nicky" Shane said softly. He sighed when Nicky rested his hand on his knee, making him look down at him. Nicky knew it was more than nothing "Why were you crying?" "Nicky....I can't....." Shane wanted to move away but he felt as if an invisible force was keeping him there "Yes you can...tell me" He said softly, not wanting to scare Shane "No...just forget it" Shane pushed Nicky's hand off his leg. Nicky simply placed his hand on top of Shane's, squeezing softly "Want me to stop?" He asked Shane quietly "No" He said in a whisper. Nicky smiled and stroked his fingers "So, want to tell me what's upsetting you?" "No, you won't want to know" "Shane, I want to know.....are you going to tell me, or do I have to ask one of the other lads?" Shane tightened his grip on Nicky's hand "They won't know anything" Nicky shook his head, thinking that he was hiding something from him "You were outside Bryan and Kian's room.....crying.....did Bryan say something to you?" "No" Shane said quietly "I don't believe you.....I think I should ask him" Nicky said, looking in Shane's eyes for his reaction. The reaction he got was one he expected. Shane gripped his hand again "Don't Nicky, please" "Are you going to tell me then?" "No" He said sadly. Nicky slumped his shoulders "Do you trust me Shane?" "You know I do" Shane offered a smile. Nicky chewed his lip thoughtfully "Yet you won't trust me with whatever's bothering you" "If I tell you...." Shane began and stopped, looking around the room. Nicky looked up at him, his eyes searching the truth "Tell me Shane....I won't judge you....is that what you're afraid of?" "That's part of it yes" Shane pulled his hand away, aware that through his nerves, his palm was moist "Shane, I wouldn't judge you.....we're friends aren't we?" "Exactly Nicky, we're friends.....and I can't lose that" "I don't follow you Shane.....you would never lose me.....never" He said softly "Not even if I told you that I'm gay?" Shane asked quietly. Nicky smiled to himself. Thinking he should have known he was worried about that "It's not a problem Shane....I know already" Shane sighed, remembering how he told Nicky he fancied him "This may be a problem though.....can you handle me having a crush on you?" Nicky knew this could be a problem. A major probem, when he not only fancied Shane, he loved him with all his heart. He looked up and Shane sighed "I guess you can't handle it" Nicky broke out of his thoughts at hearing the pain in Shane's voice, he watched him walk to the door. Nicky jumped up and grabbed his arm "I can handle it" He said weakly. Looking at him, Shane didn't believe him, the way his voice wavered was one aspect and his eyes were another. "Can you?" He asked softly "I can" He said, more strongly. He didn't want Shane to think any different. He could handle it, he knew he had to. Shane nodded and pushed his hands deep into his pockets "Could you handle something else Nicky?" Nicky smiled "Tell me what it is" Shane turned away from him "Could you handle me being in love with you?"
Kian lay in Mark's arms. He felt content for once. His thoughts drifted to Shane and Nicky. He felt bad for them, when it was so easy for him to be with Mark. He looked up at Mark, his eyes closed, a smile on his face and snuggled closer to him Mark woke up and yawned, nodding at Kian as he did. He sat up and reached for his clothes "And where do you think you're going?" Kian wrapped his arms around him and grinned. Mark sighed "Getting dressed, what does it look like?" Kian pulled back at Mark's tone of voice. Was he regretting it? He wondered "Mark?" "What?" Mark mumbled as he pulled his trousers on "Are we ok.....I mean...." "I know what you mean Kian....and I know you" Mark stood up. Kian pulled his arm "What the hell's that supposed to mean!" Mark's tone softened "Kian, we've had sex.....and now things will go back to normal, okay?" "No it's not okay...in fact it's anything but okay!" Kian yelled. He couldn't believe that Mark was saying all this "Kian....I see how you work....you don't want a relationship" "Who said anything about a relationship.....Mark we're constantly on the road, we can be there for each other...." "Yeah, well I want more than that....I won't be used.....I have feelings too. So you'll have to find yourself someone else" "Mark don't be like that, we had fun right.....I don't go in for commitment, neither do you...so why the big deal all of a sudden?" "Just forget it okay....forget it!" Mark snapped at him and held the door open "If you don't mind, I want to be left alone" Kian looked at him wide eyed "I'm not dressed...close the damn door!" Mark closed it with a sigh and picked up Kian's clothes "Get dressed Kian" He said sadly and walked into the bathroom. Kian hurriedly threw his clothes on, in amazement at Mark's behaviour, without another word he left
Nicky stared at Shane in shock "What did you say?" "Nothing.....just forget it" Shane said fearfully, avoiding Nicky's eye. All he received was silence. Shane stood against the door, his head hung low "I shouldn't have said anything. I know you won't be able to handle this" Nicky swallowed and walked towards him, his heart in his mouth. Shane cringed inwardly as he gazed down at Nicky's feet "Look at me Shane" Nicky said softly. Shane raised his head and screwed his eyes up, not looking forward to the look on Nicky's face "Nicky....I'm sorry..." He didn't look at Nicky, was afraid to. He let his head fall again "Look at me" Nicky repeated sternly. Still he didn't look up "If you're going to hit me, then you may as well get it over and done with" Nicky gasped "What are you on about....you know I never would hit you" Nicky said quietly "But what I just said" Shane said softly. Nicky sighed "Shut up Shane" Shane looked up at that, and looked into his eyes, finding no trace of anger. Nicky placed his finger on Shane's lips "Just shut up" He whispered. Shane placed his hand on Nicky's chest "What are you doing?" Shane asked, his lips brushing against his fingertips "Isn't that obvious?" He pressed against him placing butterfly kisses on the hollow of Shane's neck. Shane closed his eyes as Nicky kissed up and down his neck. Something told him that it was wrong....Nicky wasn't gay. On that thought he pushed him away "Stop this....I don't know what you're trying to do....but it's wrong!" "Loving you is wrong?" Nicky asked "Love? You don't love me!" Shane exclaimed. Nicky's eyes clouded over with tears "I do. I love you" Shane mouthed 'wow' and smiled "You love me? But....you were with Georgina for so long.....you're not gay Nicky, don't try and kid me" "I know I'm not gay, I'm bi......Shane, do you remember I told you about Justin?" "Vaguely....what about him?" "Justin wasn't my best friend....well he was in a sense, but....Shane, he was my boyfriend" "You what!" Shane exploded "You dated Justin and never thought to tell me?" "It wasn't a big deal Shane....It was so long ago" He looked into Shane's eyes and saw anger "Are you annoyed with me?" Nicky asked him timidly. Shane sighed at the vulnerability in his voice and shook his head "No, of course not" Nicky smiled and reached for his hand, smiling at him shyly "I really do love you" Shane smiled at the sincerity and he believed him. He pulled him towards him and leaned close, kissing his lips softly, parting them with his tongue. Nicky moaned in Shane's arms and deepened the kiss "God Shane" He gasped as he broke the kiss. Shane's hand stroked Nicky's hair, he kissed his forehead "I love you Nix" "I love you too" Nicky murmured as he stood content in Shane's arms, breathing in the sweetness that is Shane. His Shane
TBC