Everytime

Published on Jul 6, 2004

Gay

EveryTime

EveryTime

by

Craigger


Hey Guys... it's me again. This is something I have been working on in between the first part of Bodyguard (if you're interested...) and it's squeal. It's hard and I am not sure how to start it off. So anyway... I have been going through the boyband section and I haven't found anything on 98*. SHAME SHAME!!!! SO here's my take on the boys and altho I know they are not popular anymore I want to write about them.  Well I hope you guys like it. As Always comments go to Craigger02@comcast.net


Oh and though I wish I did, I do not know any of the celebrities mentioned in the story or anything of about their sexual preference. So get off my back ... and read the story. Unless you're too young... Oh and you don't like the idea of two guys together... Or it's illegal in you state or country, or where ever your backwoods home is.... and I can't think of anything else. So READ!!


Chapter One

I walked into a dark hotel room. I looked around the room and felt lonely. I sighed and turned on the light.

"That was hard." I said aloud but to no one. But then I thought that was nothing. It gets harder from here. I just left him, now I have to make sure I stay away.

I took the plane tickets out of my jacket pocket. I looked them over, running my fingers over the letter.

"LAX, CA to Mpls/Stp International, MN. One way." I read. I put the ticket down on the night stand and walked over to the window. As I looked out over Los Angles; the lights, the people, and the glory of the city had taken its toll on me. When I look in the mirror, I don't recognize the person I see staring back at me. This is the only way for me to get back to the person I was, the person I was before I met him.

5 months later...

"Nine8, this is Caleb." I said into the phone.

"GAWD I hate that name." My best friend screamed into the phone.

"Well it's my coffee shop and you're my best friend. So you'll just have to deal with it, Manuela." I said in a tone that was probably a little too harsh

"Um. Ok. Well that's exactly what I was calling you about." She paused for a second. "Could I come in and talk to you?" she asked.

I thought for a second trying to figure out if I was ready for this. "Yea sure, I have a full staff on tonight." I sighed.

"Ok, I'll see you in 15." She said hanging up.

I took a deep breathe and hung up the phone. I walked from behind the counter. I had been doing pretty well here in here in Minneapolis. I mean I should, this is where I grew up. Plus with the nice trust my parents left me, it let me do the things I wanted to do, like open this coffee shop in the gay friendly uptown.

During my first week here, I was a wreck. The first person I called was my best friend from high school and college. Manuela, as long as I could remember she had always been there for me. She was there when I came out in high school, she was there when my parents died, and she also understood when I called with boy troubles.

When I moved to LA to get away from the memories in Minneapolis, she was there to let me know that even though she was half a country away, she would always be there for me. But while I was out there, I kinda drifted away. So from that time until came back 5 months ago, 3 years had past. During that 3 years I had met and fallen in love with someone, and then ran away. She doesn't know about this, she also doesn't know that this week would have been our 3 year anniversary.

"Hey Caleb, you alive in there?" I heard her ask.

"Yea I am here," I said.

She eyed me for a second. "What's going on with you?"

"What are you talking about I am fine." I said lying through my teeth.

"You know, we've never talked about that night when you called me. Caleb you were crying your eyes out. You were the same way when I picked you up from the airport." She took my hands, "What happened out there?" she asked softly.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said as I snatched my hands back.

"But Caleb..." she started.

"Drop it Manuela," I said.

"Fine, but when you need to talk I'll be there," she said and then turned to leave.

I walked out to my car after I locked up Nine8. I got in and when it started the radio came on. Since it was after midnight, it was some slow jam DJ playing mellow songs.

"Hello all of you out there, I hope things are going ok out there. Now moving on from hit to hit. Here is the new joint from Britney Spears; the lovely lady is singing `Everytime'."

I listen to the first verse of the song and was captivated. It was as if someone was singing how I was feeling. And then the chorus came on.

"And everytime I try to fly/ I fall/ without my wings/ I feel so small/ I guess I need you baby/ and everytime I see you in my dreams/ I see your face/ it's haunting me/ I guess I need you baby."

I looked out the windshield, my hands not moving from the steering wheel. I was near tears; it was then that I realized that I needed to get this off my chest.

"Caleb?" Manuela said when she opened the door. My guess was that I must have woken her up. "Are you ok kid?" she asked.

I shook my head and erupted into tears. After hearing the song on the radio, I went out and bought the single for the song at a 24 hour Wal-Mart. "Put this on," I croaked through the tears.

She looked at it and rolled her eyes, which made me smile for a second. I was thankful she put it on anyway. The song came on and I wait until the chorus came on. "This is how I feel. That explains what has been going on with me." I said standing and wiping tears away.

After the chorus, she looked at me for a second. "Caleb you woke me from a dead sleep. I am going to need you to explain," she said as she yawned.

I took a deep breathe. "I met someone out in LA--In fact, I was in love with him. I loved... no I still love him with all my heart. But it's over."

She was shocked. "What? Who? Caleb I need more."

"He and I met while I was waiting in line at a grocery store. The line was ridiculously long. He made a comment about it and by the time we were out the door he had asked me to dinner. After a wonderful evening and several more wonderful evenings we decided to make it official. So he was mine and I was his.

"After almost two blissful years things started to turn sour. His..." I stopped to choose my words carefully so I didn't give out more information then I should. "...job started to make demands on him which in turn stressed him out and me to. We started to fight and things just went straight to hell.

"After he saw where this was taking us. He told his job no and it worked until our 2 year anniversary. But then about 5 or 6 months later they gave him an ultimatum: his career or me, so before he could choose I took off. I didn't want him to have to choose or maybe I was ready to deal with the rejection.

"Either way, that's how I ended up back here in Minneapolis," I said as I sat down and covered my eyes.

"So you just left?" she asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Don't you think he's worried?" she said.

"I try not to think about it," I said simply.

"Do you know how cruel that is?" she asked as her voice started to rise.

I nodded.

"Christ Caleb!" she yelled. "That wasn't your choice to make!" she said slapping my arm off my face. "He's probably worried sick!" she said.

"Listen!" I yelled putting my hand up to stop her. "I didn't come here to get yelled at. You asked me what's going on and I told you. I didn't come here for you to approve or disapprove my actions." I shook my head. "I should go," I said as I stood and walked toward the door.

"Wait Caleb," she said looking me in the eye. "I am sorry. But, I do think you should call him, just to see if he is ok." she said.

I just looked at her, and then left.

For the next two weeks I didn't talk to Manuela much. I actually just threw myself into work. The old house that I owned and converted into a coffee house needed work to be done. Some of the rooms needed to be painted and some of furniture needed to be replaced. So I set out to make sure it was taken care of.

It took longer than expected and instead of asking for help I did it myself. It gave me time to think about where I wanted to go with my life. On one of these nights I was painting one of the front rooms, when I heard the bell on the door ring, signaling me that someone had just come in.

"I am sorry we're closed." I said not looking up from what I was doing.

"Even for an old friend?" a familiar voice asked.

I turned to see him standing there. It was winter in Minneapolis, so he was wearing a pea coat, scarf, and gloves. His nose and his ears were red, making him look like a child in the winter. He shivered for a second. "What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Oh, I see. No `Hi, how are you?' or `I'm so glad to see you' or how about "I'm sorry for leaving' do I even get that?" he asked with an edge in his voice.

"I wasn't going to let you choose me," I said as I turned back to my painting.

"That wasn't your choice to make Caleb," he said as he walked up to me and turned me around.

"Maybe, but I made it anyway," I said jerking away from him.

"Did I mean nothing to you?" he asked quietly while looking out the window. It started snowing earlier.

I turned and looked up at him. At 5'10 he was four inches taller than me. "What?"

"You just left without so much as a goodbye or I love you. You just left," he said as his eyes welled up with tears.

I didn't want to deal with that yet so I changed the subject, "How'd you find me?"

"After I gave management a good piece of my mind for the ultimatum they gave, I threatened them with me quitting if they didn't find you." He put a hand on my arm. "My guess is they hired a private detective. I am just glad they found you," he said as he rubbed my arm.

I wanted so bad to fall back into usual with him, but I couldn't, not after the life I started here.

All this time the radio was playing in the background but I couldn't really hear what was playing. But for some reason I could hear the chorus in my head.

"And everytime I see you in my dreams/ I see your face/ it's haunting me/ I guess I need you baby."

I felt a tear slide down my face. "How long are you in town?" I asked delaying the evitable.

"Depends," was all he said.

"On?" I asked.

"How long it takes you to pack," he smiled.

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I love you Nick."

"I love you to Caleb," he said.

TBC


SO there it is... Oh Britney Spears owns her song.... umm.. I just used it and I hope I don't get sued =says a lil prayer= If you guys have any comments send em to Craigger02@comcast.net I hope to hear from someone... Um.. And don't forget my story ***Star Struck*** too... Have a nice day....

Next: Chapter 2


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