Facing Reality

This story is completely true and you will realize that when I go very truthfully into each nitty-gritty detail. The story speaks of my own first experience. The names of all the characters in the story have been changed

Any comments are welcome at ssc2376@yahoo.co.in

Facing reality

"Yes, turn left from here", I ordered as the auto-driver complied.

Flat 21, 22, 23.... would be right here I thought. There it was; no. 25. I payed the auto-driver his fare. He grumbled but took the money and sped off wondering what the hell I was doing at this time of the night on this deserted street. And then I glanced at the building he had dropped me off a - a seedy old building, with the white cement missing in some places. "So this is where I was gonna lose my virginity", I thought to myself, as I fished out my cell phone from underneath the many layers of warm clothing that I had on. Then I dialed his number.

But wait; let me take you back a little.

It was mid-November 2005. I don't remember the exact day this happened, which is actually very stupid but it had started to get pretty chilly during the nights. I was buying some stuff from the supermarket along with my roommate Dino when my cell phone rang. I glanced at the display and saw a number I did not recognize.

"Hello" I answered warily. I was expecting calls from unidentifiable numbers in those days.

"Yeah, err, hi…", a male voice replied from the other end, "this is Ash… I, err, I got your number over the internet."

Now I had not given this Ash my number over the internet as he claimed, but however I had taken his and had promised to call him in the night. That promise was going to be unfulfilled as Dino, my roommate reminded me of some shopping I had to do. I don't know how Ash had got my number (I still don't) but I had to be cautious of what I said. Dino was standing right next to me and he surely could not be allowed to hear this. I took about 5 steps away from my roomie who was busy looking at the shampoo display.

"Yeah hi Ash", I replied "Listen, I'm busy right now, can I call you back in about 15 minutes?"

"Ok, but may I know your name?" he asked.

I thought for about 3 seconds. Was it ok to give out my name? Obviously he had no idea of my name since the only way he knew of me was through some stupid ID on the internet. However he had let on his name in one of the numerous messages he had sent me and had also sent over a picture of himself. So assuming that the name 'Ash' that he had let on was true, we were in a position where I knew his name but he had no idea of mine. Was it wise to let on my name or should I fake one?

"It's Ayesane", I replied truthfully, "Can I call you back a bit later?" I really wanted to end this conversation with this guy cause now Dino was asking me who I was talking to.

'Wrong Number' I mouthed to him (I am such a dork). Dino nodded his head and continued looking for his shampoo.

"Did you like the picture I sent you of me?" the voice from the other end asked. All I wanted at that time was to cut off this call and get back to Dino.

"Yes, yes I did!"

"Ok, I'll wait for your call then."

Click! I cut it off without waiting to hear another word.

"Who was it?" Dino asked me again. I had no idea whether he had overheard my conversation or not.

"Some wrong number", I lied spontaneously and was surprised ay how easily I had dodged the truth.

Dino raised his eyebrows a bit, and then tossed his shampoo bottle into the bag I was holding.

Phew! Dino seemed to be satisfied with that but the way I had lied to him had left me with a really bad taste in my mouth. I felt really bad for that. Dino was my roommate after all. But this seemed to be something I could not let on to him right now. However, I had already made up my mind that soon I would tell Dino everything. And then I would tell him of all the times I have had to either lie or commit the sin of omission because of this. However, now was not that time. Now was the time to worry about the mess I had gotten myself into.

This caller-chap, Ash, or whatever his name was, had asked me whether I had liked his photograph and I said I did. That was something I had just said to get him off the phone. I had glanced at the photograph earlier and thought he looked a little chubby and not "my type" at all. In fact, I had decided that his face looked 'not very trust-worthy' and I was not sure whether I wanted to lose my virginity to this character. But now, I was kinda stuck. I had promised to give him a call soon and did not know what to expect. But then those perojative words came back to my head - '20 year old virgin.' I decided I was at least gonna call him back once I got back to the hostel.

Now a bit about myself before I go on. Gay? well obviously. Getting laid? Well obviously not! 'male, gay, 20 years, engineering student' my profile screamed out for all to read on the internet. That was all true, but that's all I had wanted to reveal about myself. I even came up with a nick such that absolutely no one should get a clue as to who it was on my end (I tend to panic a lot). And then the profile demanded some other details like was I interested in friendship, relationship, 1 to 1 sex or group sex. Initially, without trepidation I ticked all four, but then, realizing the prude that I was and would always be, I unchecked the group sex box. Maybe later, I thought. Much much later.

And just prior to the phone call in the supermarket, I had been online and this 'Ash' had sent over his photograph asking if I was interested.

"We'll have dinner in the mess?"

"Huh?" I stuttered, shaken out of my reverie.

"I asked, should we go back to the campus and have dinner in the mess or you want to have dinner someplace here?" Dino asked, a little irritated.

"Yeah sure!" I replied, a little too enthusiastically. "We'll eat in the mess itself."

And then we headed back to the campus. I tried to force out the thoughts of the caller from my mind on our trip back to the hostel. The thought that I had to call this guy back was obviously constantly nagging me. Once back at the hostel I had to get rid of Dino for a few minutes, as selfish as it seemed, cause this Ash character was waiting for my call.

"Hey, just head for dinner on your own, I'll just go to the room and leave my jacket there" I told Dino, thinking, I really did need to leave the jacket cause it would be warmer in the mess and I was not going to carry the heavy thing around with me.

"Ya, I need to keep mine back too" he replied and started walking with me.

Grrr. How do I get a moment alone.

"Hey Dino, just head over for dinner and I'll join you a little later. Gotta make a phone call." Just tell him what you had to actually do, I thought.

"Okey-Dokey" he replied as he headed towards the mess.

I fished out my cell phone and checked my received calls list. And then I dialed the number, not knowing what at all to expect.

One, two three rings later, the same voice that had called me earlier answered on the other end.

"Hello?"

"Yes, hi Ash, this is Ayesane. Sorry I could not talk to you earlier. Was busy back then."

"That's okay man."

Uncomfortable pause.

"So Ash, tell me a little about yourself, how old are you? What do you do? Where do you live yaar?"

"Umm.. 27 years old" he replied, answering only one question.

I waited for a few seconds, before continuing.

"And where do you live?"

"At King circle" he told me. I had no idea where that was and told him the same. He asked me where I lived.

"Dinhump Road", I answered before I started ranting on and on about myself, telling him about my college, my branch of studies, where I lived, etc etc. talk about maintaining a certain level of anonymity! Somewhere in the middle of my saga, he interrupted and asked me.

"Listen, what are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing actually"

"Then why don't you come down here? We could have some fun."

Uncomfortable pause.

"Err, ummm okay" I hesitated.

"You like sucking dick?" he asked me point blank!

That's when I decided it was time to throw in the towel.

"Listen man, I am TOTALLY inexperienced", I don't know if it was a wise thing for me to have said that.

"Okay, then when you masturbate, do you think of sucking dick?"

Gawd! This guy was forward. At least compared to me he was.

"Yes." I replied, "And maybe getting sucked too."

"Would you like getting fucked?"

"Ok"

"Okay, then I am gonna do it to you. I am gonna fuck you."

So this is where I would lose my virginity. He said he was gonna 'do' it to me. Strangely, I was pretty calm.

"Oh-Kay", I said slowly, "But safe sex man, you get the condoms."

"Fine. So you come here by 9:30?"

"Yeah fine" I replied, looking at my watch, it was 8:15 now. "I have to have dinner and then I'll come over." I knew it that very instant that I would hardly have any dinner and would spend all the time just 'preparing' myself; mentally as well as physically.

"What size is your dick?" another blatant question.

"Every gay guy asks the other that question" I chuckled into the phone.

"So what size is it?"

"It's 7 and a half inches."

I did not have the guts to ask him the same question. God, I suck!

"Good, good…." he said appreciatively. God! Now I know what a piece of meat feels like. "…And are you attractive?"

"I am very ordinary looking." I replied truthfully.

"Describe that."

"Well, I am 5'11, thin…."

"Do you have sharp facial features?"

"Errr… I don't know."

"You better not be fat, I hate fat guys!"

Sheeeesh! Now I was feeling like a cheap whore. Maybe I won't sleep with this guy.

"No, I am not fat", I replied indignantly, "In fact I am slim and have a pretty good body. Other than that, I look pretty ordinary"

"You sound nice though."

Okay, so maybe I would sleep with this guy.

And then he proceeded to give me his address which I wrote down on the back of my mp3 player manual with a red pen.

"Listen, before you hang up", I said, "I am, well, versatile. You only a top?"

"Yes. A pure top."

Sheesh! Looks like I was only getting my cherry popped tonight, was not getting any cherry myself.

"Okay, I'll be there at 9:30."

And that was that.

And then I rushed to the mess lest I be deprived of my dinner cause the mess' closing time was 8:30. Obviously I bumped into Dino in the mess, in fact I had to go and sit next to him. I made small conversation for some time but I had to tell him I would be gone for the night.

"Listen, I just spoke to my L.G." I lied, "I have to go their house tonight."

"At this time?" he asked surprised. "But then why are you having dinner?"

Now L.G. stands for local guardian. When we enroll in our college, the students staying in the hostels have to fill in a name and address of a local guardian who stays in the city. For emergency purposes and all. So your L.G. could be some of your relatives, or your relative's relative or something like that. My L.G. was notorious for calling me to dinner and letting me feast on all kinds of delicacies pretty regularly, and I always used to boast what a great cook my aunty was. But then why the hell was I having dinner in the mess?

"No, just gotta meet someone." Shit! I bet you could see it on my face. I was lying through my teeth. I am sure Dino caught it. He never let it on though.

"Ok, but when will you be back? You promised you would play tennis 6:30 tomorrow morning."

Shit! Had forgotten about that.

"Sorry man, will have to cancel."

"Okay" he replied, disappointment written all over his face, as he got up and left having finished dinner himself. I wolfed down my meal and rushed towards the room. Fortunately Dino was in some other room when I got back cause the room was empty. First things first, I said, as I made my way to the bathroom. I had some cleaning up to do!

So sitting there in the toilet, I forced myself into a contemplative mood. Here I was, cleaning up my insides to get fucked my some person I would soon meet for the first time in my life. I was taking a mammoth risk. And he had explicitly all but asked me to just lie down, roll over and spread my legs like a bitch, and I had agreed. What was worse was that I had not even the guts to ask him the same questions he had asked me. I had hardly any idea what was coming other than the fact that my ass was gonna get foisted into tonight.

I had always been a romantic sort of person, to the point where I even fantasized that only one man would have me in my entire life, and I was gonna stick with that guy. Basically I was going to wait till I got into a 'lifetime-long' relationship. I would have confirmed that one year back, but now, seemingly my darker shades had saturated me. Actually, the truth was that I wanted to have sex just for the sake of having it. I know, I am a very convoluted person.

Fortunately I was in good shape cause I was doing 100 push ups everyday and playing tennis regularly. That gave me a good upper body, so at least that was something that would increase my confidence. I was sure this As character would at least appreciate my body.

Just then an SMS came from Ash. *Dude, make it 10:00 PM.*

*Fine* I texted back.

Was I ready for this? Ready or not, I was going.

I made my way back into my room to find Jon and his friends practicing with a guitar and an octapad. Jon saw me getting ready and asked me where I was going. Two more lies later, Jon had learned that I was going to L.G.'s place and that they would be picking me up at the college's main entrance. I put on some warm clothes, not too fancy cause I figured they would be out of the way soon, and left the room.

Shit! I was actually doing it. I was going to be deflowered within half an hour or so. And I did not seem very happy, only lots of fear, I was distraught. Maybe it would be better to just not go over to Ash. Maybe I should just stay back, enjoy the music with Jon and his friends, joke about with them a little, play some computer games, go peacefully to sleep and then wake up tomoorow morning and play tennis with Dino. it would so peaceful and stress-free.

5 minutes later I came back to the room.

"What happened?" Jon asked.

"I forgot something." I replied, as I picked up the address written on my mp3 player's manual that I had left on my desk.

Then I 'actually' headed towards the frightful goal.

Soon I halted an auto and asked him to take me to the address that I read out from the one I had written down. He told me the price for the trip. God! I was going to have to pay for this heavily, literally that is. I hope this would be worth it.

After much searching and asking about 10 people on the way we finally made it to the place.

"Yes, turn left from here", I ordered as the auto-driver complied.

Flat 21, 22, 23... would be right here I thought. There it was, no. 25. I payed the auto-driver his fare. He grumbled but took the money and sped off wondering what the hell I was doing at this time of the night on this deserted street. And then I glanced at the building he had dropped me off a - a seedy old building, with the white cement missing in some places. "So this is where I was gonna lose my virginity", I thought to myself, as I fished out my cell phone from underneath the many layers of warm clothing that I had on. Then I dialed his number.

Ash had told me earlier to come below his apartment and give me a missed call when I was standing down. He would then come and take me to his flat. I gave one ring and cut the phone. And now I looked up at the building and my heart started beating wildly. What the hell was I doing? Whats wrong with me? Why am I doing this? All sorts of questions. 2-3 minutes of impatient introspection later, no sign of anyone. In fact the whole damn road was deserted, and my mind was in overdrive. What if people see me standing out here and guess what I am waiting for? What if cops drive by and take one look at my face and land me in jail? Dammit! Why was this guy taking so long? Maybe he saw me through binoculars or something from some hidden window and was not coming to claim me after seeing how I looked or something. I gave the number another missed call.

Footsteps to the left informed me that Ash had come. I turned and saw him, in a loose t-shirt and pajamas. He was shorter than me, about 5'7 or something, he was also stouter. But he did not look much like the picture he had sent me. Not in a bad way, nor in a good way, just that the picture was pretty different. As he came over, I extended my hand.

"Hi, Ash, Ayesane here."

He inched closer and stared at me. I mean he really stared at me, moving his eyes all over my body, and yeah I felt totally naked and all that shit.

"Yup, wait, just wanted to check whether milk was available." He said as he led me to a sidetreet. I followed silently, not having the guts to eat him with my eyes in the way as he had feasted on me.

"Nope, milk van left" he stated, "Anyway, come up."

I was still making conversation as we made our way towards his house. So you stay here alone? What work do you do? Why is the building so deserted?

He just answered with monosyllabic answers. He must have thought what a loudmouth he just picked up.

"You pick up guys like this often?" I asked, getting a little bold.

"Not too often." He replied, opening his door and stepping in. "Come on in."

I followed, heart thumping and all, I took off my shoes near the door, and then with one swipe took of my sweatshirt, cause it was getting too warm inside and it was going to go anyway. Ash headed straight for some room inside.

"Come inside" he beckoned.

I walked into the room dimly lit by a yellow bulb. So THIS was it.

Ash put one hand around my waist and pulled me towards himself, and then pulled my face closer and immediately started smothering my lips with his own.

Ok, so this was supposed to be my first kiss, by a guy no less. And it was, well, sloppy. Ash had probably taken some form of mouth freshener just before cause he tasted all minty. His lips were all over my mouth and his tongue was assaulting it. It felt, well not at all like what I had imagined. Ash's hands were roaming all around my back and were now caressing my butt. I felt all invaded, but clearly this was just the beginning. And then he put both of his hands around my waist and motioned for me to pull my t-shirt up. I broke the kiss for a moment to pull of my t-shirt and then got him out of his clothes. Talk about me being in control! He had no underwear on.

I resumed kissing him with more fervor this time. I wanted to savor this moment and feel it properly. I did not feel very electrified or anything, like the way cheesy stories describe it. Just a lot of tongue and spit and scraping around teeth and all. With my courage level a little higher, I foisted my tongue into his mouth and started exploring with it. Now THAT was feeling nice. I remember trying to feel whether I was hard or not, cause usually I was horny as hell. I was turned on but not fully erect.

Then Ash pressed his weight upon me and forced me towards the bed. I noticed he had no underwear on, so much for wearing my most sexy Jockey underwear. And somewhere down, I could feel his excitement straining between our bodies. Ash continued kissing me, him on top and then turned us both over, and now I was on top. I broke the kiss once more to take of my Jeans and underwear and then returned back to Ash. This was not very exciting or hot or amazing or whatever. My imagination had taken me to places 10 times better. I felt a bit mechanical but if I was not going to have a good time, I was going to make sure that Ash at least did.

I continued smooching for all I was worth, and then started moving my mouth all over his face. I licked his ear and then slowly bit it, I ran my tongue over his chin, I bit his lower lip slightly and forced my tongue into his mouth as deep as it could go. I did all those things they mention in erotic stories and was doing all I could to turn this guy on. Should he not be moaning and heaving and groaning by now? Well, I was certainly not crying out in ecstasy and he seemed dispassionate too. But then he started grinding his hips against mine, and his breathing got a little heavy, so at least one of us was enjoying this. I was just doing things mechanically.

Supporting myself with my hands on either side of him on the bed, I moved down and started kissing his neck, leaving my saliva at all places, and then I swooped down and concentrated on one place on his neck, sucking on it wildly. The idea of a love-bite always turned me on, and I certainly was going to leave my mark on this guy. I sucked for a few more seconds and then continued my downward peregrination of his body, my mouth exploring everything down his collar-bone and then down to his chest.

Now the torso is my utmost favorite of the male anatomy. Nothing turns me on more than a really really sexy, well-defined torso. Ash was not in very good shape, and had extra weight. I searched for his nipples and starting biting and sucking on them. Ok, so he was not too turned on by that, I never am either, but it was worth a try. But the hair on his chest was causing a nuisance and getting all over my mouth. So I moved southwards along his flabby stomach, his belly-button and towards that oh so familiar gay sex destination - his crotch.

He was as hard as a baseball bat, and yes his dick was screaming for attention. So I took it into my mouth without a second thought. He gasped slightly. My first taste of cock.

Then I withdrew for a second and looked down at what I had just swallowed moments before.

"You're thick." I said flatly. And thick he was. He seemed as big as me but he was way too thick. And strangely, at that time, I never worried about how he would enter me later with that thing. His erection was thicker than anything I had seen before in porn videos. It really was and that, was really surprising.

Continuing, I enveloped his dick with my mouth again withdrawing for just a second to mumble, "you are really thick."

"Just warn me when you are about to cum." I told him.

"You wanna drink my cum?" he asked suggestively.

"No." I said matter-of-factly and left it there. I had no intention of swallowing his semen and thought it appropraiate to just tell him so.

And then I turned all my concentration into trying to give him the best time I possibly could. The penis in my mouth tasted bland, not any flavor, just clean (thank God) and insipid. It was filling my whole mouth and I don't think I ever got to taking more than half his entire prick into my mouth. And I moved up and down, withdrew, licked the bulbous head in the sexiest way I could, concentrated on his slit, the lower portion, sucked and licked at his testicles, everything I had read of and just basically tried to get him off. I reckoned I would at least get him off once like that. But then on and on I sucked to no avail. It was getting a bit boring and I secretly just slipped my hand to my own penis and was gratified to at least find that hard. It seemed all my working on his dick was of no great consequence but just then Ash quipped-

"You wanna make me cum so soon?"

Okay, so he was actually enjoying it, thank heavens for that, but he intended to cum only once? Hell, I was ready for several rounds!

"No man" I replied, not wanting him to know my actual thoughts, and I moved back up to his face to continue kissing him. "you wanna fuck me?"

"Yes" he replied, pausing me, "Just let me get the condoms."

So this was the actual 'this was it' moment. Here I was about to be fucked for the first time in my life. By a person I had met about 5 minutes ago. How had I come down to this? Well no time for retrospection now, Ash was back with a packet of condoms and was just tearing one of the packets.

"How do you want to do this?" I asked wanting to know wich position we would do it in.

"Just put on this condom for me and lube it up with your spit."

He had not answered my question and had asked me to lube it up with my spit. What the fuck? He thought he was gonna take me on spit? And he wanted me to lube up the condom with my spit. Balls to you man! Somehow he realized I was not going to lube up his condom clad dick with my saliva.

"Don't you have some sort of lubricant?"

"Err, no." he replied.

"Not even Vaseline or something like that?" I could not remember whether Vaseline was a safe lubricant to use for anal sex or not.

"I do have coconut hair oil."

Off all the abominable things in the world! Well looked like, I was soon gonna have smelly coconut oil up my butt! Ok, at least get that. So he did.

Okay, now I was aware that this guys dick was way to big, and if all the literature I had read on the net was anything to go by, I would need some working on to get my anal muscles all relaxed and to take this guy in me.

"Okay, just lube up the condom nicely, lube my hole and then loosen me up from behind with your fingers first." I was ordering him. Later I learned he was not one to listen.

"Let me lie down." He stated and then asked me to sit on his dick.

Well he had not lubed me up from behind though he had lubed up his 'condommed' rod. But if I was on top, then I would have some control and thinking that I sat across his belly with one leg on either side of him and positioned myself a few inches above his hard dick, which was standing straight and erect. I was actually a little frightened, though you would never have made it from my face at that time, but that anxiety and trepidation had caused my erection to go off. Or maybe I was just not turned on anymore. So I lowered myself on his cock as he positioned his dick to go in my hole. And when I felt it on my anal ring, I wondered how the hell was it going to enter me at all? It felt like he was pushing a steel rod against a cement wall - it was pointless, nothing was happening down there. Had Ash fucked anyone before?

"It's not working" I said, "let me lie on my stomach and you fuck me from behind."

He grunted as he lifted himself off and we changed positions, albeit this time with me on my stomach.

"Just use some oil and loosen me up with your fingers once."

But Ash never paid any heed to that request. Later I realized that Ash probably did not even like to touch guys' asses. He simply would not put his fingers in one. And he was ready to insert his manhood into one? What a hypocrite. Ash never loosened me with his fingers that day.

Ash dripped a few drops of oil in what he thought must have been my hole and then started to insert his dick into me. It was sorta uncomfortable, his weight all over and his dick pressing against my most private parts, but I was gonna get fucked tonight. No matter what. My mind was made up on that one.

The head of his dick was way too big; it was like two different heads joined together or something. And it was extremely painful when he pushed that against my behind entrance. He made little progress and it was just hurting a lot.

A few moments later, he exclaimed "Oh shit, the condom tore!"

Well great, the wrong lube and the thickness of his cock were probably responsible.

"Do you have another one?"

"Yeah, I do."

And he took another packet and started tearing that with his teeth. I just lay there. And then thought of all the pain I had just experienced and decided to tell him once more.

"Listen, just use lots of lube and loosen me up with your fingers first, it's not going to wok this way. I am not opening up." Here I was telling him how to do it, and I was supposed to be the inexperienced one!

He just grunted and then positioned himself with his dick above my butt again. He was pushing his dick in directly once more. Was he not listening to anything I said?

2 minutes later I was pinned down beneath him as he was not making any more progress. He was trying to fuck me from behind anyway and my legs were not spread apart or anything, so his entering me was in a very awkward style. It was not, what I called later, a full penetration, just a partial one where he was humping against my butt and my anal sphincter was milking him. But it was painful like hell. It was hurting like a bitch, and I was in a very pitiful state. I tried relaxing my anal muscles, tried the crapping action, everything, but nothing was working. It was just plain hurting. And Ash was trying to push on and on.

"Just push it inside a little and keep it there for a while."

He was not listening, cause he kept trying the same long strokes.

"Just inch in a little and keep it there." I requested, "let my muscles get used to having you there."

I think he tried that one for about 5 seconds or so.

Now my endurance was at its limit. I was flaccid, not at all turned on. It was horrible. I just wanted him to cum so this would end. I was sure I would not let him do this to me one more time, if he wanted to get off once more, I would make my mouth oblige. I remember trying to see when I was pinned down like that, could I force myself off him? Seemed difficult, but not impossible. After all, those 100 push ups I did per day were also done in a similar position.

"Oh shit."

The second condom had torn.

"I have one more", he stated, and proceeded to put that on.

"Don't you get condoms for extra thick dicks or something?" I asked innocently.

"Nope."

Then he asked if it would be better to try it in another position. So I turned over. That's when he noticed that my cock was totally limp.

"You don't have a hard-on" he said and took my dick in his hands and stroked it a few times.

"It's because I am pretty scared about this." I said and that was mostly true. I took his hand off trying to arouse me cause it was not going to work and I got back to the task at hand.

"Don't worry about it." I comforted him, trying to convince him that it was not because he was not turning me on. And to think I was the one in need of comforting here.

A few amusing moments later, when no other position seemed to work, we were back to our doggy style with him foisting his cock from behind into me again.

"It's hurting too much", I pleaded, but that just seemed to slow him down for 10 seconds and he was back at it again.

Now all I wanted was him to get off and this to get over. I just wanted this to end, but I also wanted him to enjoy it. Some people call this my naïve nature. But by then other forces had started to work. All my pretend crapping and this phallus invasion had stirred up my bowels and I was feeling like shitting pretty badly. But I kept mum at first. I kept thinking that this would be over soon and I would then relieve myself in the bathroom and probably enjoy that a lot more than I was enjoying this. 2 minutes later, his dick was still somewhere like 2 inches inside me and I needed to go to the bathroom really really badly.

"Just hold it a sec, I need to go visit the bathroom."

Talk about having a really quaint first time!

"You feel like shitting?"

"Yeah" I replied unabashedly. After all if he was getting to enjoy all my fruits, he would have to understand this as well. No need to be embarrassed.

"Ok" he said and pulled himself off me. Well at least he understood that without much explanation. Maybe he was not that bad a guy after all.

I got off the bed and walked away from him towards his bathroom. And I felt really sordid when I did that. I wonder what my ass looked like from behind. Was it all open with a gaping hole and all since I was so freshly fucked?

The damn bathroom never had a light and Ash had to turn on a bulb somewhere else where light peeped in through a small window up, illuminating some sections of the bathroom. So here I was, in the middle of my deflowering session, sitting on the pot, emptying my insides so I could go and get the task completed. Was I a virgin at that moment? Nah! Could not be. I just had this really big and thick dick shoved up my ass though only some distance up. But I was also distraught. Why the hell was it hurting so much? What could I do to lessen the pain? Certainly, Ash was not helping me on that front but was there anything that I could do? To get him off fast seemed to be the only solution. I flushed and headed back to the room.

Ash was lying on his back and his dick with the condom on was half hard.

"Ok, lets resume from where we were." I said, sounding cheerful and putting a smile on my face.

"I lost my erection." He stated flatly.

"I can take care of that." I smiled suggestively as I lay on top off him and was kissing licking and all the works.

2 minutes later we were back in the fated doggy style fuck mode. He was trying to go in deeper and deeper and it was paining a lot. I told him it was hurting but that just served to stall him for another 15 seconds and he would come back to those same strokes.

"Should have found some guy with a smaller dick to fuck me for the first time." that was the cheesiest thing I has said that night. But it was pretty much what was on my mind. And I figured it would boost his ego for me to complement him on how big his dick was, since almost every guy, gay or straight takes a lot of pride on the size of his cock. So I said it anyway.

I decided to shut off the pain and just concentrate on giving him a good time. I pulled him closer and started to breathe heavier, panting just to turn him on, and making all sounds of extreme pleasure. NOW I knew why women fake their orgasms. I took his fingers and sucked them in my mouth. He seemed to like that and pressed his fingers in my mouth all the more. Stroke, stroke, stroke he went as he 'half-fucked' me.

And then without warning, he gasped and spasmed inside me. Finally!

I was overjoyed and that was pretty ridiculous. He was the one who had had the orgasm but clearly I was the one who was certainly the happiest, relieved that the ordeal was all over, happy that he had gotten off and hopefully enjoyed himself, and overjoyed that I was no longer a virgin though I established that one a bit before.

"Successful in the third attempt" he grinned as he pulled himself off me referring to the third and final condom which had endured us to the end.

I laughed along with him, cause I was truly happy at that moment and I saw the milky semen accumulated at the tip of the condom and was satisfied that he had not lied to me or something. He got up and went to get himself cleaned and to flush down the condom. And then I saw his form getting off me to go to the bathroom. He was all flabby and chubby and in an egg-type shape. And he had said he did not like fat guys? It repelled me a little but I just lay there naked and reveled in my post-orgasm glow, well at least Ash's post-orgasm elation, thinking that if he came back and needed to get off again, I was going to do it with blow-jobs. I was most certainly not getting fucked or half-fucked as I called it later with that phallus anytime soon. But Ash just came back and started wearing his clothes to get into bed.

So he was least interested in getting me off eh?

But then this is where a different version of Ash started.

"Hey dude, you gonna stay the night?"

"I plan to, if you would have me." There was no way I could get an auto to take me back to my hostel at this time of the night anyway.

"Okay, but my maid comes at 7, you'll have to leave before that."

"No problem, I'll leave before 6:30. I am used to waking up at 6 anyway."

"Here, just take some clothes for the night, it will get chilly." He said, handing me over his shorts.

I put on the shorts and then put the bottle of coconut oil aside, which I had noticed for the first time and just pulled out the blanket. Ash turned off the light and joined me. He pulled me really close, almost as if inside him and set us in a position with my head on his shoulder blade, the back of me head using his arm as a pillow and my other hand pulled up tight against his body. This guy really liked to snuggle up.

Ash started talking next, and that was when I learned that some men just feel like talking and talking once they had orgasmed.

I don't remember all that he talked, but he seemed to be a nice and genuine person, once he was out of his blatant fucking mode. He told me a lot about himself. He told me about his family, he told me about how a hurricane would strike home if his parents found out about his sexuality. He told me he was bisexual and that one day he would end up marrying a girl. I told him *poor girl* for that and he just laughed. He told me about some size queen gay guy who was in the city he used to live in before who had told all his gay friends about this eight inch cock wonder. He told me about his job, what work he used to do, where he had studied and how he liked his profession. He told me about this time when he had done it with a horny girl who had made him cum three times and all. And to think he was all out on just once with me. He told me a lot of other things I can't remember now, but he talked for about an hour and I just lay there next to him listening. It was not boring or anything, it was pretty entertaining, since I had no gay friends and it was nice to talk to someone like this.

He kept asking me whether I was getting bored. I assured him I was not and encouraged him to go on adding my own experiences here and there. I think more than an hour later, he finally fell asleep. But sleep did not come easily to me.

I wondered at all that I had just done or had let someone do to me. Was it like heaven? No certainly not. I had not even gotten off even once. And if I wanted to, I could masturbate 4 times in a single night, and here, I had not peaked even once. Sex with Ash had been pretty one-sided where both of us were totally into pleasing him and only him and he did not even care to get me off or anything. I had not asked him to do it anyway, cause I knew he was not going to go down on me or anything and it would just spoil the mood. These are things one should do on his own I reckoned. So no orgasm on my first time. But still, it felt nice to sleep so close to someone like the way I was. Ash just pulled me and the blanket closer in his sleep. At least he had had a good time. Now that was nice.

Ash woke me up many times during the night. With his constant tossing and turning and pulling me tighter to him. I don't think he was awake any of those times but I was - each time he prodded me during the night. At one time we he was also awakened. I guess the time was 5:00 AM or something. Ash got really horny and started getting all gropy gropy and stuff. He guided my hand towards his cock and it was rock hard. And then he pulled the neck of his shirt as far as it could go till it exposed a nipple and brought it towards my mouth. What the fuck was this? What, was he breast-feeding me or something? I sucked on it a little but the coarse hair was too much for my mouth but I decided not to disappoint him. I worked my way down and took off his pants and then taking of my own clothes (which were actually his) I engulfed his cock in my mouth again. Well, looked like I was not getting any sleep this night so I might as well make someone happy for it. And the I started bobbing up and down his cock, determined once more to get him off.

And this time, it really did get boring. I was doing all I could with my tongue and mouth. A few minutes later I got vigorous and started sucking his cock for all I was worth while simultaneously stroking it from the base. And then I did something unbelievable. I was doing things so mechanically that I thought I would bob my head up and down on his cock for a 100 counts and he would surely get off by then. A 100 counts later, I had upped my aim to 200 counts and still no orgasm. Somewhere around count 140, Ash sensing I was getting tired (God bless him) asked me to stop. He then forced me to lay down as he kneeled over my chest and started ejaculating himself wildly. A good number of wanks later, (He must have been doing the stroke count thing too) he realized he was not going to get off at all.

"I am not gonna cum now." He stated and stopped. I felt a little bad that I had not been able to get him off for second time but I did not want to try again for fear he might get embarrassed. So I pulled him gently down to the bed.

"No problem man, just join me down here." I said, giving him a smile and he seemed pretty fine. I just realized he was waiting for my reaction up till then.

He snuggled close once more and I changed my position turning over so he was spooning me this time. he seemed happy with that position and moments later was in Snoresville again. I did not get any sleep after that. I had not orgasmed even once and now had a raging hard-on myself. I decided to ignore it. Around 6:15, I got myself up and started wearing my own clothes. Then I did a set of 25 push-ups right there on the floor of the person who had just ravaged my ass the night before. I looked at Ash to see what the peaceful sleeping 'lover' looked like but it was too dark to see. I then gently woke him up.

"Wake up Ash, I have to leave."

He woke up really groggily and sat upright on the bed. He glanced at the time.

"Hey Ash, could I use some of your toothpaste?" My mouth was stinking like a rat died in it the previous night. Taking his toothpaste, I put some on my index finger and performed my daily ablution without toothbrush of course. By the time I had washed my face and returned, Ash was up and walking around though still sleepy.

"You want anything to eat or something before you leave."

"Yeah sure, do you have a glass of milk? Chilled preferably."

He checked and saw he had none. By the time I had already put on my shoes and was ready to leave.

"Just give me some water then."

He did, I gulped it down and started to leave. I was wanting to say something nice about the night I had spent when he asked me.

"I hope you enjoyed yourself."

Ha! Enjoyed? I had not gotten off even once but still…

"Yes. I had a real nice time."

And then I asked him for a god-bye kiss joking about his breath.

He acted real gentlemanly and wanted to accompany me till downstairs. I let him.

Later on my way back to the hostel, I gathered I had not been very nice about complimenting Ash and the time he spent with me so I SMS'ed him.

*Had a really great night Ash, thanx 4 sharing it with me.*

*No problem dude! And next time u will surely get ur chilled milk* he texted back.

I was worried about having to walk all the way back to the hostel since I did not want to spend anymore money and I would not get an auto this early in the morning. Plus I had missed my tennis work-out and was determined to use this walk as a substitute. 30 minutes later I realized what a stupid idea that was. It would take me another hour to reach the hostel at this rate and I wanted to sleep. Just then by divine intervention, 2 camel riders passed by and I asked one of them for a lift. He agreed. So I had one hell of a bumpy camel ride all the way back to the hostel. Great experience. I guess living in India can have it's own set of advantages.

Around 7:15 I was back in my room, back in the hostel and I was exhausted due to the lack of sleep. Ash had been very attention demanding and I had barely slept an hour or two during the entire night. I collapsed into my bed, no longer a virgin.

Any comments are welcome at ssc2376@yahoo.co.in