Falling

Disclaimer: I do not know the BSB I have never met the BSB. This is just a story in other words it's not true. I do not work for anyone that has contact with the BSB and so on this is just a story I hope you like it

Extra Disclaimer: I do not know Nsync, I do not know anyone that knows Nsync.

Authors note: I have noticed that not many people write BSB stories. So I have decided that I will write as many BSB stories as I can. I might right a few stories about different bands. But don't count on it to much. Ok I use a few different symbol's in my story to help it. These *** mean a character change, right after the *** a name will follow. When I am starting a story off either from the beginning or from the start of another chapter. I will put the name between these ***. Now I'm going to try and stay away from using this but it has happened in the past. These (()) mean a note from me or a time change. Most of the time I'll just write out the time change. But there are times when I'll get a little lazy so please understand. I will not give my main character any weird powers like my other stories. So this will be the first time that I'll write a normal human story. Which mean's no Sryin's or anything else. I would also like to add that if I start to slip to yell at me to stop. I hope you enjoy the story. It may look like I've slipped up in here but I haven't so don't start yelling yet. I am not having one of my super natural moments. I've started two other stories to keep from doing that. So no yelling yet please, unless it's nice yelling I could really use that about now. Ok I haven't asked until now, but now I'm begging please write me. I would really love to hear what everyone thinks so far. My e-mail should be on this somewhere.

Warning: This story isn't like my other stories it's a lot darker. it involves Rape and a few other things later in the story. You've been warned.

Raven

Justin stepped up and held his hand out to him. "It's an honor to meet you man." Richie smiled and pulled Justin into his arms. I knew that it was going to happen, that was just Richie for you. "It's good to meet you as well, I'm happy you could make it today." Then Richie moved to Britney and hugged her tightly. Justin didn't move it was like he was frozen. "I've been waiting to meet all of Lance's friends for a while now. I would like to welcome you all to our home and our family." He was doing it again, I could see the defenses falling. He had just put himself right in their hearts, and he wasn't even trying. I wished that I had his gift for making friends, I could own the mob. I swear the boy could get the devil to stop hating. Justin looked to have recovered from Richie's warm greeting. Britney hadn't even missed a beat as she kissed Richie on the cheek. "Come meet the rest of the gang, it's time we put an end some rumors." Richie smiled and walked away with Britney, Justin stayed behind and watched them leave. "I thought he was sick, or something. That's what Lance told us, but he seems fine." I looked at him and asked myself if I could trust him. "He is sick, and there's a good chance he's going die. He doesn't let it get to him he just charges forward without a second thought." I could feel the tears falling from my eyes.

I hadn't meant to break down in front of complete stranger. I felt his arms around me in just a few seconds. "Don't worry he's going to make it, if there's anything I've learned it's that hero's don't die." His word sent a chill running through my body, all I could do was look at him. "No, you don't understand no one does, no one but me." He looked at me confused but in an understanding way. "He is dying, all of his happiness is an act for everyone else. He's in so much pain that he cries every night, but he hides it. I had even started believe that he would make it. Then one day I went to surprise him by picking him form the hospital. He wasn't there, the nurse said that he didn't have an appointment. She added that maybe he had just got the days mixed up. Then I came back home and waited for five hours. When he came in I watched from the shadows as he pulled himself together. Then he lied to everyone telling them that the treatment went great. He's dying and I can't help him, I feel so powerless." I had told him everything while he held me. I didn't understand why I had chosen him, I didn't even know him. "Are you sure that's the reason he wasn't there, maybe he just stepped out for a bite to eat?" I looked at him he was trying his hardest to ease my mind.

I looked into his eyes, he was really being a gentleman. "He won't let anyone know what's going on with him. I've tried to ask his doctors but they keep their mouths shut. I even called Richie's agent, he says that he hasn't been told anything. You see most people would have just taken that answer. The thing is I know Jake, and he would have had more to say if he didn't know anything. He would have just started asking questions he didn't. I think Richie is planning his death, and he won't let anyone help." I guess I had pulled Justin down to my level of thinking. "Why haven't you just out right asked him what was going on?" I looked at him, he had asked the question I had asked myself a dozen times. "I think he's just trying to die without everyone worrying about him. I think he wants his last days filled with happiness. That way when he dies everything will be perfect." Justin nodded slowly as he pulled me into a room as Richie walked by. "Then I understand why you haven't said anything to him." I found myself being pulled back to the real world. I decide that it's time we returned to the party with the others. "I'm going to go clean up a little, go join the others." He nodded and left the room, I don't bother to ask him to stay silent. I could understand him telling Britney, but no one else. I had a strange trust in him that I didn't understand.

I rejoined everyone in the living room, everyone was all in one place. I noticed that Richie was at the head of the room. When he saw me a smile formed on his lips. "Now that everyone is here I can start. I have some news that I've been keeping from everyone." My heart was racing, he was going to end the game. "Now most of you know that I have cancer. That I've been getting treatment for it for a while now. What most of you don't know is I've been getting triple treatments. In most places this is not done since it can kill. I've been using three different names and going to three different hospitals. That's the reason I take a cab all of the time. My agent gave me a hand with this little drama. Ok this all just backup news so you'll understand what I'm about to tell you. The tumor that I have is dead, and it has shrunk to the size of a pea. The surgey that I will be having will remove it. After that I'm will be in remission, in other words I'm going to be around a while longer." Everyone started cheering, I found myself falling to the ground. I had been so wrong, but no one would ever know how much I loved that fact. Everything that he had said was making sense to me now. To think that I may have screwed all of that up just by opening my mouth. I found two pairs of arms picking me up from the floor. I noticed that it was Justin and Britney, both were smiling brightly.

The rest of the day was perfect, and nothing could bring me down. It was like all those nights I hadn't done anything had paid off. I was even happy to be the flower girl, even if I got some weird looks. When everything was said and done it had to have been the most beautiful wedding I've ever seen. Then it was time to party, and I mean really party. Richie wasn't doing all that much dancing but he was having fun. Everything was great and Nick even got Richie to sing with him. It was one of the cutest things I had ever seen, even if my brother couldn't carry a note. On the other hand he was dancing like a pro even if he was a little slow. I took up dancing with AJ, he was so cute with that grin of his. Then as the night went on everyone was dancing Justin and Britney had joined AJ and myself. We had switched dancing partners, it seemed Justin had something he wanted to tell me. "I told Britney, I hope your not mad at me." I just shook my head how on earth could I be mad at him? Plus I knew that he would tell her, it was understandable. I looked over at Richie as he laid down on the couch. He looked so peaceful, his chest was rising slowly as he breathed. "It's fine Justin, I thought you would tell her anyway. I understand, just make sure you two don't tell anyone else." He nodded and we switched again.

The next couple of days went by pretty slowly. It was pretty much a relaxed time for all of us. The surgey was coming up which just stayed outside of our minds. The surgery itself was dangerous and risky, but it had to be done. Richie could still lose his sight, or even his life. All of us had thought about it from time to time. It was just now I believed he would make it. If he was willing to almost kill himself to live then he could do anything. That's what my heart wanted to believe, my mind still had a lot of doubt. I knew that my brother had to be the strongest man I had ever met. I looked up to him even if he was only minutes older than I was. Everyone in the group looked up to him in some way. AJ had told me that Richie was one in a million, and that was a good thing. I had laughed at him for the last little comment. I was getting closer to him every single day we spent together. He was the wildest person out of the group, but he was also the sweetest. I found that keeping my mind on other things helped me deal with everything. As the date got closer my mind started to think only of the surgey. It was as if my mind had focused on that one moment in time. It was in truth the center of my universe, it was all that mattered.

One day before the surgery people started showing up. Some had just come by to wish Richie luck. I was delighted that so many people had stopped by. Then people I hadn't expected to see showed up. The first person was Rosie, she had an over night bag with her. She then asked if she could stay all night and go with us to the surgery. Richie had thought it was the sweetest thing. I had to admit that I liked the idea myself, she had always been there when we needed her. So we set her up in one of the guest rooms, we didn't have that many. About two hours later Nsync showed up with smiles on their faces. I had invited them in, when they stopped me to ask if they could stay all night. The request had thrown me for a loop, but I agreed only if they would share rooms. That had gone well, but I wondered how that was going to work out. I thought that would be the last person to come by, I was proven wrong. I had been shocked by the next person, it was Britney. She had this worried look on her face and looked a little tired. "I'm sorry for stopping by unexpected, but I would really like to support Richie." I just nodded and held the door open for her.

After she entered I noticed that she had been dropped off by a cab. I also noticed that she had a few bags sitting near the stairs. "Brit, what are you doing here? Just last night you were in LA, that's a big trip." I was now impressed with Britney, and she was staying the night. I didn't care if she wanted to leave, she wasn't going anywhere. "I took a few days off, what are you doing here? I do believe that you and the guys were in Florida." I waited for their answer, this was starting to get interesting. "Well, I guess we were thinking the same thing as you. I don't know Richie all that well, but from what I do know, he's one hell of a guy." I smiled to myself as Justin finished, I was really starting to like him. I went outside and took Britney's bags to my room, I wouldn't mind sharing it with her. As I passed Richie's room a heard a small amount of noise. I knocked on the door softly, it slowly opened on it's own. At first glance I didn't see anything, but as I reached in to close the door I saw a body. I ran into the room and knelt down beside my brother. His breathing was shallow and his chest was rising and falling quickly. I started screaming for help, I heard a flood of people coming. "What happened is he ok? I'll call an ambulance." I didn't know who had been talking, but I was thankful someone was doing something.

The next two hours went by in a flash of light. The doctors didn't look surprised that this had happened. "It's apart of the backlash from all of the treatments. In time his body for the most part will return to normal. Richie should be awake by now you can go see him." We moved as one down the hall, a model a talk show host two boy bands and a pop princess. I was just waiting for some jerk to jump out and take a picture. If one did god save his soul once I was done with him or her. The doctor was wrong about Richie he was far from a wake. Nick was by his side in seconds, he had finally stopped crying. I watched as Nick rubbed Richie's hand slowly waking him up. "Sorry about that, I guess I should have told everyone. I just didn't think I would have to worry about it anymore." My mind screamed to a painful stop as I realized he had said anymore. I hadn't even known anything like this had been happening. I wondered how he had kept this a secret. "Hey, don't look so down, maybe it's better this way. Why don't all of you go home and get some sleep? Then you can all come and see me tomorrow before the surgery. Then we can have a huge party and invite the whole city." I couldn't keep the laughter from escaping.

Richie finally got everyone to head back to the house. I didn't really want to leave I just had this feeling it would be the last time I saw him. It was this strange feeling I had in my chest. He had wanted us to leave so quickly, why had that felt so odd. It was like he was hiding something from us. I shook the thought out of my head, it was no use worrying about it now. I had to get everyone to their rooms, and quickly. I planned on being at the hospital at the crack of dawn. That was about ten hours away for I had two hours to get everyone feed and to bed. I ordered pizza for everyone and begged the driver to please hurry. I told him that if he could get it here in less than thirty minutes there would be a hundred dollar tip. Everyone had pizza twenty minutes later, and the driver got his hundred dollar tip. We watched a short movie then everyone went to the room they were sharing. When I reached my room I noticed that Britney was already asleep. I decided that I would check in on Nick. The door was wide open, so I just walked in slowly. What I saw would remain in my heart for the rest of my life. Nick was on his knees by his bed praying. I could see the tears falling from his eyes as he asked god to save my brother. His voice was thick and heavy as he spoke softly. I could hear the pain in his voice, but over the pain I could here the love.

I left Nick's room without making a single sound. I went back to my room and got into my bed beside Britney. She hadn't moved once, now that I looked at her I could see the girl not the pop star. She was just as normal as anyone I had ever met, maybe a bit weird. I had never thought I would see her again after the wedding. Then out of the blue he shows up to show her support. Then I had another reason for liking her, when she wasn't watching herself, her southern accent was worse than mine. I closed my eyes and tried to push every thought out of my head. I had to get some kind of sleep I wanted to be fully awake in the morning. My mind kept focused on the idea that something was wrong. I finally drifted off to sleep, my dreams were filled with my childhood memories. Then as the dream went on something caused me to start crying. I wasn't dreaming about my past any longer. I was dreaming about tomorrow, and my brother wasn't normal in the dream. He was smiling and he looked so happy and at peace with himself. That had made me smile until I had gotten a closer look at him. He had these Wing's coming out of his shoulder blades. Then as I looked down I could see his lifeless body below him.

I woke up screaming, which happened to scare the living hell out of Britney. She jumped out of the bed and rased her fist. She had this total look of fear and anger on her face. Nick and Brian ran into the room, both had bats, I was impressed. That didn't help calm Britney down, it only made her madder. She went running at both of them in a blind rage. She stopped two feet from attacking them, she looked at them and then me. "I thought I was in a hotel having a wonderful dream and a psycho fan just ran in. Where the hell did that scream come from?" She turned around and looked straight at me with concern riding her eyes. "I'm sorry I had a nightmare, I just couldn't handle what I had to see." Britney had moved to my side and placed her arm around my shoulders. "Tell us about it, it'll help you get back to sleep." I looked at them, it wasn't really something Nick needed to hear. "I dreamed about my childhood, and my brother was always the hero. Then I dreamed that he was an angel, all of that was beautiful. Then as I looked down I could see that he was floating over his body. He was gone and there was nothing I could do to help him." I had started to shake and cry again, Nick looked scared. "Why does it always have to be this way?" None of them understood the question, I guessed it was time that I started to share my thoughts.

We all talked for the rest of the night, we shared everything that had been on our minds. "I keep thinking I'm going to wake up one morning to find him gone. The thought itself sends chills up my spine. It's like that no matter what he's not going to make it. He's been through so much, and still everything keeps hitting him. It's like he's fighting an up hill battle, and as he gets closer to the top the further it gets away." I looked at Nick thoughtfully, he and I had shared some of the same thoughts. My alarm went off scaring the living hell out of everyone in the room. Brian had broken it with his bat just seconds after it had gone off. Then I could hear other alarms going off one after another, it was time to get dressed. "Everyone has one hour to get ready, so lets get a move on." Everyone that was in my room nodded, then stood to hit the showers. In the house there was a total of three showers. I let the others go first I had to make sure everyone else was awake. I went from room to room knocking and shouting lightly, no need to be rude. When I noticed that no one had gotten up I got a little louder. When that didn't work I decided it was time to get down and dirty. I walked into each room and ripped the blankets off the beds. When I entered Lance and JC's room I found it empty, I was a little confused. I hadn't seen them get up, or leave the room for that matter.

I looked around for a note thinking that maybe they had already left. When I walked into the kitchen I found them both drinking coffee. "Morning Raven, did you manage to get everyone up?" I nodded toward Lance and smiled lightly as he handed me a cup. "You can hit the next shower if you want, it'll only take me a few minutes to shower and dress." Lance nodded and slowly looked away toward stove. I could have sworn he looked saddened, and if he was I knew what had gotten him this way. I now believed everyone in house had been thinking on the same level. I waited for everyone else to shower and dress. Then I got in the shower and washed off as quickly as I could. I then looked in the mirror then I moved to my room. I didn't worry about wrapping a towel around my body. If you lived in this house hold long enough you saw everyone nude. Then again I guess some of the members of Nsync weren't expecting a free show. To get to my room I had to walk through the living room where everyone had been sitting. I heard a few cat calls and someone had dropped something. I couldn't help but to smile, it wasn't everyday you got that kind of complement. I through on some black jeans and a silver blazer. I went back out to the living room and asked who was riding with who. It was then decided that we would need three cars. It wasn't really a problem, I had my car, Nick had his and Brian could drive Richie's.

We left the house five minutes later, I had to drag Justin away from the mirror. When I pulled into the parking lot I had a small problem getting out of the car. I didn't really want to move, my heart was racing and my dream kept replaying in my mind. Britney placed her hand on my shoulder to gain my attenion. I looked over her way to see the guys just outside the car. Everyone was waiting for me, so I opened my door slowly. I found that I was really weak all of sudden. Brian wrapped his arm around my side to help me walk. I don't know where all of my strength had gone. It was like something had just stolen it from me. Once we got in the hospital I took a seat outside my brothers room. I didn't have the strength to go in first. After a few minutes had passed I pulled myself together and entered the room. Richie was sitting up smiling like a little kid, he looked so healthy. It was a really odd sight, I had thought I would see something else. I was grateful that I hadn't. I walked over and hugged him tightly, he whispered something in my ear. I couldn't understand and I wasn't given the chance to ask him what he had said. "Ok I know this is sudden but we need to get this show on the road." I looked over at the doctor and then to Richie. He had this far away look in his eyes, and then I watched his lips move.

I couldn't hear his words, no one could and I was the only one looking. In my heart I knew what he was doing, he was telling us all good bye. No one else had seen his lips move, everyone had looked at the doctor. I know in my heart it was what he had whispered in my ear. He didn't think he would make it through the surgery, and now neither did I. I looked away, I couldn't handle the thought that this could be the last time I would see him alive. After everyone was pushed out of the room I found myself sliding down the wall. I just didn't have the will power to see this through, and I couldn't tell the others. There was this slight amount of hope that he would pull through. I couldn't let all of my hope die not after all this. After they took him into surgery I got everyone together to pray. We all sat in a circle, heads bowed downward hands joined. We prayed, when we opened our eyes we found that others had joined us. I looked around the waiting room to find everyone's heads bowed. This jester meant more to me than any other I had ever seen. I knew that some of these people had no idea who we were. Still they had joined us in a prayer for a person that was unknown. The tears that fell were one of love and hope, and somehow I knew he would make it.

Six hours had passed since they had taken Richie into surgery. None of us could sit still, it wasn't supposed to take this long. When the doctor walked toward us I jumped up and moved toward him. Nick was right behind me, the others soon followed. The doctor looked a little upset, which only meant bad news was coming. "Richie is in recovery, but there are a few things I need to explain. The surgery itself couldn't have gone any better. Now on the other hand there is a little bit of bad news. While removing the tumor a nerve was damaged slightly. It'll heal with time so there's no fear there, but the nerve was a very important one. Richie has lost the sense of touch in his right arm, so he can't tell if what he's about to pick up is hot or cold. This will be very confusing for him, and sometimes scary. There are other problems with this as well, like the fact that he won't know how much presser he is applying to anything. You'll have to let him know if he's holding your hand to hard and so on. There will be times when he will drop things because he isn't holding it tight enough. So you see everyone is going to have to give him time to get use to this. The nerve could take years heal, or he could be all better in a couple of months." I grabbed the doctor and hugged him tightly, everything would be fine now.

I walked into Richie's room first and asked the others to wait. I wanted to make sure that my brother was decent. He had to lay face down for the next two days until his wound healed enough. I pulled the blanket up past his waist, then I looked closely at his scar. He was starting to gain a collection on his back, it brought tears to my eyes. I shook my head and went to get the others. Nick gave me a dirty look, then smiled brightly. I shook my head forgetting for the time who his boyfriend was. Everyone entered the room one after another. Richie was far from awake, but that didn't stop us from visiting him. Nick was looking at the scar on his back, it wasn't that bad. It was a straight line, not very wide and it was only about three inches long. Nick looked like he was going to touch the scar then he backed away. For an untold amount of time we just stood there. No words were spoken or needed, this was what we hoped to be the last time something like this would happen. I closed my eyes, and for the second time he looked like an angel. He was still floating over his body, only it wasn't lifeless it was sleeping. When I opened my eyes I could still see what I had seen in my dreams, it faded quickly. I took a seat and waited for him to wake up, I found myself falling to sleep.

I woke up hours later laying on a bed in my brothers room. Nick was talking a mile a minute, along with Brian and Lance. I sat up slowly and looked over toward my brother, his body was shaking lightly. At first I had thought he was in some kind of pain, then I heard the laughter. "I swear when I can move freely all of you are getting your asses kicked." Nick made a comment about Richie's butt, then everyone started laughing. "If you don't leave my brothers butt alone I'm going to kick your asses." Lance looked over at me and ever so sweetly smiled. "Well, it's kind of hard not to talk about something so cute." Richie raised his hand and waved for me to move closer. "Get'em Rave, don't let them get away with that comment." I looked at Lance and smiled brightly as I moved toward him. He was up and out of his seat in seconds, that wasn't going to help him any. I already had my hand on the back of his shirt, so I gave it a hard tug. His feet went flying out from under him and his butt hit the ground. "You know your a lot stronger than you look." I was sitting on his chest in seconds looking at the fear on his face. I raised my hand high over my head only to be stopped by Brian. "Now he didn't do anything to deserve a hit like that." I looked at Brian, he looked a little upset. "I wasn't going to hit him Bri, come on you know me better than that." He smiled and released my hand which sailed down to Lance's face.

I patted his cheek gently and stood up and offered my hand to him. He took it smiling then slowly stood up, he was shaking his head. "Who need's a body guard when you have Xena Warrior Princess for a sister." I couldn't contain the laughter, and in my eyes it was a complement. I left the room to get a cup of coffee, as I walked down the hall I found someone didn't think I would see. I bumped into this woman who had her head held down. When she looked up my blood turned to fire as I looked into her eyes. "Rachel, I'm so happy I ran into you, no one will tell me how Richie is doing." I looked at my mother with confusion riding my mind. "Why would you care, it's not like you've ever cared before?" She didn't look shocked or even upset that I held no love for her. "He is my son Rachel, and you are my daughter. My blood runs in your veins as well as your brothers. I know we haven't made the best choices in our past, but I am trying now." I looked at her and smiled, there was no way in hell she was getting near my brother. "Your right you haven't made the wisest choices, and now it's time to pay the piper. I won't tell you anything about Richie, and no one else will. You will never see your son face to face again. Do you understand that, never we don't want to see you. Now leave before I have a guard take you out." She closed her eyes and nodded slowly, then she turned and left.

I followed her out the of the hospital, she looked saddened. I had this dark spot in my heart that screamed in joy. I couldn't help the smile that preyed upon my lips as she looked back. She had tears falling from her eyes as she walked through the doors. I had never seen my mother cry, something in my heart jerked. I found that I liked the idea of causing her pain. I turned and walked back to my brothers room, I no longer craved any coffee. Richie was talking about hitting the gym in a few weeks, while Nick told him it wasn't going to happen. "Your in no shape to go to the gym, you have to rebuild your body first." Lance and Brian looked a little worried about where this was going. "I know that Nick, that's why I need to hit the gym. I'll take it easy I promise, and I'll get the doctors permission first." Nick had his eye brow raised and his arms crossed. He looked very stern, but it wasn't doing any good. Richie couldn't see Nick anyway he was face down in a weird looking bed. It almost looked like one of those beds you found at a spa. You know the ones you used when worked on your back and all that. "I don't think your going to be doing anything of the sort dear brother." I listened as Richie let a moan rip lose, it made him sound so helpless. "Not you too, I thought you would be in on this with me." I only laughed it was a simple way to get my message across.

To Be Continued Maybe.........