Forbidden Love: The Story of Brian Litrell and Christian Williamson
Well okay, here's one more story about Brian Litrell. I know there are a lot of 'em out there, but I've got some things lined up that haven't been in other stories. If you want to spoil it for yourself, you can go to the home page for this story at http://members.tripod.com/brianandcrist/ and see what events will unfold here.
I would like to mention the sex thing. There won't be sex for a while. This story is going to be more true to life than most stories, and most people in real life don't have sex the day after they meet each other. If you'd like a full explanation to this subject, go to the web site and click on 'explanations' to the left. So if you're not going to be in this story for the long haul, just go back and don't bother reading any further, cause this is going to be a long one...
I've mentioned the web site like twice already, so I might as well explain it. It's not big, but it does contain a spoilers section, some of my explanations to certain things, a FAQ section and a summary of what's happened in the story so far. So go check it out at http://memebers.tripod.com/brianandcrist
In the story I separate thoughts from speaking by using "" for actual speech and '' for thought. So incase I don't say "...he thought" after using '', assume it's a thought. I also use '' to 'highlight' stuff, just like that.
To separate settings, "~~~" are used. So when it cuts from Christian to Brian, you'll see "~~~" I use those quite a lot in the beginning.
I'm going to try to put out a chapter per week. They won't all be as big as these first ones. Probably only about ten pages each. I'm not guaranteeing anything, so if I'm late on a chapter, or it's really short, don't get yourself in a frenzy.
Legal stuff: This story is fictional. Any similarity to real life is purely coincidental. If you are offended by material that contains a homosexual theme, do not read any further. If you live in an area where homosexual literature is illegal to possess, or you are under 18, do not read this story. If you do, you're continuing at your own risk.
The setting for Christian is on the Rosie show, and the setting for Brian is on their tour bus going to New York, sitting in the kitchen area with Nick. It's 10:00 am and Brian is watching Rosie, Live.
Enjoy... Christian
Forbidden Love:
"Well you've all heard of him by now, he's the 19-year-old sensation who is taking the music industry by storm with the hit song 'What you are is what I need' that has skyrocketed to the number one spot with in a week. He is now going to star in the Broadway production of Martin Guerre. I'm talking+ about none other than Christian Williamson."
The crowd roared as I walked out on the platform which Rosie's desk was on. I shook Rosie's hand and sat down. The crowd was still going crazy. I couldn't believe it. After a minute, when the shouting died down, she started.
"So Chris, may I call you Chris?"
"I prefer Crist, but Chris is fine." I said.
"Okay, Crist, how does all this success feel? I mean listening to this crowd, you're definitely on top."
"It's a little overwhelming. I mean getting to record an album was my dream. Having it go platinum, in the short amount of time that it did, well was beyond my imagination. And now getting to star in the opening of Martin Guerre is absolutely phenomenal." ~~~
"Oh my gosh, did you here that? Christian Williamson is going to be in Martin Guerre." Brian could hardly containing himself.
"So what." Nick said uncaringly.
"You know that's my favorite musical." Brian replied.
"Oh ya, sorry hun. I forgot." Nick leaned over and gave Brian a peck on the cheek.
"That's okay... Shush. I want to hear this." Brian stared back at the tv. ~~~
"I wish you would have been nominated for a Grammy." Rosie said.
"Well actually my 'stardom' didn't happen until a couple of days before they announced the nominees, so I'll just have to wait 'til next year." I told her in a wishful tone.
"I'll bet you anything that you get a Grammy next year."
"I'd be happy with a nomination. But who wouldn't want a Grammy?" I replied jokingly.
She looked down at her cards for a sec to see what the next topic she needed to bring up was. "So of course you being involved with music, you have to have a couple of favorite people or groups." She said inquiringly.
"Well my favorites are Ace of Base, the Backstreet Boys, and Belinda Carlisle." ~~~
"Holy Shit! We're one of his favorite bands!" Brian yelled.
"Wow. Someone famous like us." Nick came back sarcastically. ~~~
"Okay. Cool. Well why do you like these particular groups?" Rosie asked me.
"Well they all have a fast beat, and I like that. Ace of Base is just awesome. I love the more techno-disco rhythm in their songs. The Bridge is my all time favorite album. Let's see... I like Belinda Carlisle because she has a lot of songs that are varied. And I like the Backstreet Boys because the harmony is great, they have great voices, and their songs are well..." I shrugged, "great." Then I added in a sarcastically-gay tone, "Oh ya, and because they are all so cute."
Everyone started to laugh. "Well in your opinion, which one do you think is the cutest." She asked playing along.
"Well that's a stupid question. Brian of course. He's got that cute smile, blue eyes, and those facial expressions while singing that are to-die-for." I said in the same sarcastic-gay tone. I couldn't keep in any longer, and neither could Rosie, we burst out laughing.
The only thing was, that I actually meant it, but of course, had to make it sound like I didn't. I like to leave hints that I may be gay so that I don't leave my gay fans disappointed. I see famous people giving hints that I pick up on, and it kind of makes me feel good, so that's why I do it.
"That's surprising. I would've though you'd say Nick. I think that's his name, right? Nick?"
I nodded. "I just don't know what those girls' problem is. I mean sure Nick's got his good qualities, but really Brian is much cuter." I said as seriously as I could, but I started laughing anyway. "Hey I thought this interview was supposed to be about me."
"It is, it is" she got out, trying to stop her laughing. "Well okay, getting back on track, what's the story behind Martin Guerre, and how'd you get the part?" ~~~
"HA HA! See I told you I was the better looking one." Brian said to Nick.
"Awe shut up. It's only one person." Nick covered his mouth, faking that he was suprised. "Oh wait, so that means you have two people that think you're good looking: Me and Him."
"I think I'll leave you for him. He's going places." Brian retorted sarcastically.
"Well he's not going into your bed. That's my spot." Nick said commandfully, but with a smile though.
"Of course not. No one could take your spot. Now come here, I just can't stand to be this far apart." Brian told Nick as he pulled Nick on top of himself.
"Hey let's go to the back of the bus so that after we're done, we can just sleep there until we get to New York." Nick said.
"And who said we were going to do anything?" Brian joked.
"Well I just assumed..." Nick replied innocently.
"I was kidding. Go ahead back. I'll be there as soon as this Rosie interview is over." Brian winked at Nick.
"Okay, but don't be too long."
"I won't. Make sure that bed is ready" Brian said with that devilish grin of his. ~~~
"... so if I wouldn't have sung in that church that Sunday, I wouldn't be doing the Broadway thing. Just the album." I finished.
"When did you find time to record the album?" She asked. I had mentioned that practice was almost all day long before.
"Well actually I recorded a big part of the album a while back and finished it when I had time. Mainly on weekends and stuff, which the producers and sound men weren't to happy with, but oh well."
"You're a very busy person then, aren't you?"
"Aren't we all..." I said sighing.
She nodded a big yes and rolled her eyes. She definitely knew what it was like to be busy. "So when is this Martin Guerre thing over, and when do we get to see you in concert?"
"Well I don't know when I'll stop Martin Guerre because as of right now, I don't have any tours planned. I think I'd like to open for some group on tour before I go out by myself."
"I can understand that. Getting back to the present, when is this huge premier of Martin Guerre?"
"Well I'll tell you, only if you come." I said teasing her.
"Trust me, I have my tickets already."
"Wow, I'm impressed. Okay then, It's one week from today. March 1st."
"Well you'll just have to come back to tell us about how it goes. You should be here on the third. The Backstreet Boys will be here." She said smiling.
"I'm here then." I was completely serious, and then I laughed.
"Good. So when we get back from break you'll sing us a song from Martin Guerre?"
"Actually it's a duet called 'All I Know'." I said matter-of-factly
"Great. I'm looking forward to it."
"I'm looking forward to you hearing it." I was being cheesy, I know. ~~~
"Hey Nick, you want to see Martin Guerre with me on its opening night?" Brian yelled back.
"Not really. You know I don't like those things."
"Okay. Well I'm going anyway" Brian was disappointed.
"That's fine. Just hurry up and get back here. I'm going to explode soon." Nick let out a sexual grunt loud enough for Brian to here.
"Ooo Baby. Hold on a couple of more minutes."
"I'll try." Nick yelled.
The Rosie show came back on the tv in the bus with a clip of my song.
"God, what a great song." Brian whispered.
"Here he is, Christian Williamson singing 'All I know' from Martin Guerre with Amanda Davis."
'I love this one too.' Brian thought to himself. He started to sing the words with Amanda and myself, glaring into the tv screen.
'Maybe it would be better if I didn't go, I might try something.' He pondered. 'Nah, I think I can behave.'
The song ended and Brian reluctantly went back to Nick. He wished there would be more singing or more of the interview After hearing that song he finally realized what he had tried to block the last months: He wasn't in love with Nick anymore. Sure he really liked Nick, a lot, but he didn't love him, and that's what Brian needed: love. The song made him feel empty in a way and he knew his relationship with Nick wasn't going to last much longer. He wasn't sure how Nick felt, but since he knew this would be one of the last intimate moments with Nick he would have, he was determined to give his all
As Brian walked into the room, Nick started to say something, but Brian put his finger over Nick's lips, not wanting to spoil the moment. He started to kiss Nick passionately all over, and before they knew it, both were undressed. Brian lead Nick into what had been Nick's highest sexual peak ever. When both were too tired and too strained to continue, they collapsed on the bed and fell asleep. Brian woke up about 30 minutes later and pulled the covers over top of them as it was getting cold.
Kevin came in and woke them up a few hours afterwards. They had arrived at the hotel. "Come on you two. Put your clothes on. We have to get checked in." Kevin said.
"Okay. We'll be out in a sec." Brian replied rubbing his eyes. He shook Nick. "Nick wake up. Now."
"Okay, okay. Jeez." Nick got up and they went to their room in the hotel. They both fell asleep again on the king sized water bed.
Meanwhile, I left the NBC building to go to my apartment two blocks down from the plaza hotel. I was beat, so I just flopped down on the bad. Trying to get through all the girls is tiresome. 'They are always grabbing for me. I wish I could tell them that they didn't have a chance with me cause I'm gay. Wow, that would break a lot of hearts!'
The Next night I went on David Letterman. It went well. Same type of questions as Rosie, and just about the same kind of atmosphere. ~~~
Brian and the Backstreet Boys were working on the Album, and getting ready for the Grammys, so Brian didn't get to see the Late Show.
"Awe man, I missed the Letterman interview with Chris." Brian said walking into his room.
"Oh so now you're on a nick-name basis and you don't even know him?" Nick questioned Brian in a sarcastic manner.
Brian got defensive. "Well that's what everyone on the talk shows call him."
"Hey, I'm just joking."
"Ya I know. I'm sorry. I'm just so tired. I'm going to bed. Are you coming?" Brian yawned.
"I'll be in, in a little bit." Nick said taking off his coat.
"Okay, but I'm not staying up for you." Brian went to his room and immediately fell asleep as he dropped down on the bed. Twenty minutes later Nick came in. He was a little hurt that Brian didn't wait for him but knew Brian did have a long day, physically and mentally.
"Why can't we be like we use to be?' Nick asked himself looking down at Brian. "What's been happening? We used to be in love so deeply, or at least I did. God, if I only knew what was going though your head." Nick sighed, and crawled next to Brian. He gave Brian a gentle kiss on the cheek and went to sleep.
The following day was the Grammys. I didn't go, and went to bed early. I was too depressed. I wished I could have been nominated, but oh well... At least my boys got nominated, although they didn't win. To make my day even worse, some papers and tabloids ran a story saying that Brian and I were in love and seeing each other. Cass, my agent dropped them off earlier saying that I needed to deny it all, which I agreed to. I wish it would have been true though. I was amazed at how quickly the tabloid press worked, they sure could do a lot of damage in a short amount of time.
Seeing those articles really got me down, even more than I had been. I knew that because of those stupid papers, I'd probably never be able to meet them, and definitely would not be able to do any projects with them.
The boys came back to New York that night. They were on a tight, but not too tight schedule to get the album done, so they couldn't stay the night in LA. They got to the hotel, went to their rooms, and fell asleep. None of them even bothered changing their clothes. ~~~
The next morning Cass called, telling me that Oprah's guest canceled and they wanted me to fill the spot. The only trick was that I had to catch a plane to Chicago in 40 minutes. I threw a a change of clothes in a bag and ran out the door. A cab was already waiting for me. I made it to the airport just in the nick of time. I got on the plane and fell asleep. ~~~
Brian woke up, but didn't wake Nick because he needed time to think. He stripped down and got in the shower He stood there letting the water run over him.
'Jesus, what's happening? Why is Nick getting on my nerves so much? Is it just me or are we growing apart? I don't know. Wait, I got it: tonight we'll wrap up early and got to a nice restaurant. That'll give us some time to talk. Hmm... Will this be it then, or can we get over our problems? How do you get over the problem of not loving somebody? Well, I guess I'll see...' Brian thought. He finished showering and got dressed. Then he went to try to wake up Nick.
Brian sat on the bed and looked at Nick. He brushed some of the stray hair off of Nick's face. "Nick, Nick, wake up hun." He said softly, shaking Nick gently.
"Hmm, you know what?" Nick looked in to Brian's eyes.
"What?"
"I love waking up and seeing those blue eyes of yours." Nick smiled.
Brian got a little teary-eyed. He leaned down and gave Nick a passionate kiss, but it didn't feel right to either of them. They pulled away looking at each other with questioning, but saddening eyes. Brian broke the silence. "What do you think about cutting from the studio early and going out to eat, somewhere nice? We really need to talk and get things cleared up."
"Ya, we do need to talk. Do you have any idea where we'll go?" Nick asked sitting up.
"Not yet. It can't be too nice. People might think we're gay." Brian smiled.
Nick rolled his eyes in disgust at the thought that they could never be who they really were. They always had to be want the public wanted. "God forbid."
"Well... You need to get ready to go. We've got a big day ahead of us." Brian said as he stood up and took a little stretch.
"When don't we?" Nick yawned.
Brian stood up to leave Nick to get ready. "Oh ya, when you're done, come down to Kev's room for breakfast." Brian blew Nick a kiss then shut the door and went down to Kevin's room. ~~~
Well I finally got into Chicago. I got off the plane and was immediately ushered into another cab. It took us about 20 minutes to get to the studios. I stepped out of the cab and a group of people that were there to prep me for the show, greeted me. They told me that Oprah would talk with the audience for about 10 minutes, cut to commercial, then talk for another five minutes about some Angel Network thing, go to commercial, and then it would be time for me to go on.
I was lead to the dressing room, got changed, and then waited for them to call me out. They had a TV in there so I could watch what was going on. Luckily I was able to change the channel. I thought they would have had it locked so that only 24 hour Oprah would be on. Well I was flicking through the channels and low and behold, the Backstreet Boys video 'All I Have to Give' was playing.
'Brian looks so much better with red hair.' I thought to myself
"Hey honey, I got in as soon as I could." My 'girlfriend' Jes said bursting into the room, interrupting my assessment of Brian '-) "Oh my god. I love these guys. Brian is so cute. He looks better with dark red hair than blond."
I started to laugh a little. "That's funny. I was just thinking the same thing." I said jokingly as I went over and gave her a hug and a kiss. God, I hated keeping this up.
"How long until you're on?" She asked.
"I'm not sure, when they want me, they'll come and get me."
The guy popped his head in the door right then.. "Speak of the Devil." I said giving her one last kiss.
"Do good."
"I will." I said as the that guy dragged me out and through the halls.
"Okay now, I'll cue you when to go. What you'll do is walk up, shake her hand, giver a kiss, hug her and then sit down. From there, it's up to her where the interview goes.
"Okay." I stuttered out. His directness took me by surprise.
"We have a very special guest today... Christian Williamson." As soon as Oprah said 'Christian,' the audience roared. "Okay, okay... He's put out a cd that is doing phenomenally well and is going to premiere as the lead character in Martin Guerre which is opening on March 1st on Broadway. Everybody please welcome Christian Williamson."
I went up, did the hand shake, kiss on the cheek, and hug thing then sat down.
"So Christian," She started.
I interrupted her. "You can call me Crist."
"Crist, with a 't' at the end?" She looked a tad perplexed.
"Ya, I like it that way. It's unique."
"Okay Crist, how are you doing?" She continued.
"Surprisingly well actually. Considering all the stress that's been put on me lately, I feel fine."
"That's good. Are you getting giddy about this MG thing yet?"
"Not really" I answered. "I mean I've gone over it a million times. I used to get nervous about singing in public, but now it's just as easy as doing talk shows if not easier."
"So the fact that you're the lead character in the premier of the what's got to be one of the biggest shows to happen this year, doesn't intimidate you?"
"Well a little, of course, but that's understandable. The part is perfect for my voice, we've practiced the choreography of it a lot, so I think I'll be okay. It should be up to the writers standards." I said laughing lightly.
"It better be. I paid good money for my tickets." She started to chuckle.
"I don't think you'll be disappointed."
"That's good. I'm looking forward to it."
"Me too." Actually... I wasn't. I was nervous as hell. I had been lying about not being scared or anything, but I couldn't let anyone know it.
"To turn the table on something more serious..."
"Uh-oh." I interjected.
She cracked a smile, and then went on. "You being in the music industry, an 'entertainer', having a great voice, not being too macho, being so cute...".I knew where this was going. She was going ask me, about my sexuality. "And then your interview on Rosie's show the other day, have sparked a lot of suspicions as to your sexuality. What's your response to this?"
"This is how I see it. I know I'm straight, my girlfriend knows I'm straight and my god knows I'm straight. That's all that matters to me." I hated lying about being gay, but I had to. "People are always going to ask questions, no matter what a person does. If a celebrity tries to hard to act straight, people are going to think he or she is trying to cover up being gay. If a celebrity acts normal, there are always things that are going to be questionable, so people still have suspicions. And if a celebrity acts gay, then people think he or she is gay. So no matter what, you never get away from it. I just act like myself, I don't try to put on an act. What you see is what you get. I'm not going to be somebody else, just so a couple of rumors stop. That's not the way I am. If I want to make a simple joke about some guy being cute, I'm going to do it. I'm confident enough about myself, that what people take out of it, doesn't matter to me." I took a deep breath. I had just made all of that up on my own, and quite frankly, it was tiring.
"So then there's nothing between Brian Litrell of the Backstreet Boys and yourself." She was very uncomfortable asking these question, I could just tell.
"Of course not. The idea is absurd." I said boldly. 'Wow, how true that is. He'd never even want to meet me now, because of this whole mess.' I reasoned in my mind. "I've never even met the guy."
"Well good. That just needed to be cleared up." I could tell she was glad it was over. She turned towards the camera, "We'll be back after these commercial messages." The music played and then they yelled out that the camera wasn't on anymore. "Hey, I'm so sorry about that. They told me I had to do it." Oprah said leaning over towards me.
"No, it's okay. It did need to be addressed." I replied sincerely.
"Good. I'm glad you're not mad."
"How could I ever be mad at Oprah Winfrey?" I asked smiling. She smiled back at my little joke.
"Okay guys. Ready... 3... 2..." A man in front of the camera said. The music started to play as they came in from commercials.
"Welcome back. We're hear with Crist Williamson. He's just released his self titled album and it's just skyrocketing up the charts. He is also debuting his acting side in the Broadway production of Martin Guerre." She introduced me nicely. "We were just talking about Chris' sexuality and all the media frenzy about it, and yes girls, he's straight. But he's got a girlfriend." A disappointed "aww..." came from the crowd which was mostly made up of women.
"One that I love very much, too." Man I did a good job of BS'ing.
"So where is your sweetheart?"
"I think she's still in my dressing room." I saw her on the tv, waving. Apparently they sent a camera down there. "Hi Honey." She smiled and waved back. They didn't have her miked.
"You seem like your in love." Oprah interjected. I think she might have been trying to recover me and herself from the little 'sexuality' thing.
"We are. I don't know what I'd do without her." I replied. A loving 'aww...' came from the audience this time.
"It's so nice to see people in love and happy." She cooed.
If she only knew how deprived for love I was. The rest of the interview went well. She was able to get some baby pics of me, which was embarrassing, but fun. We talked about my life and how I got here.
"So what was life like before you became famous?" She asked.
"Well it was actually miserable before I broke in. I was so worried about what would happen with my life in the future, that I'd make myself sick"
She listened with amazement. And curiosity. "Wow." she said lightly.
"The only thing that lifted me up was being able to sing. I'd sing in churches, chorus, PMEA festivals, and a couple of other things. My voice instructor was a main part of it in the beginning. He got me started in singing and for that I'll be forever thankful." I finished up.
She continued with the questions. "So how did you come about to get a record deal?"
."Well I got a million books about the industry, found out how it worked and used it to my advantage, really. I got an agent, who is wonderful, and eventually the contract came around."
"Was it a hard road here, in your opinion?"
"It was. There were a lot of doubting times, but I'm glad I stuck with it."
"Did you have a driving force?" She inquired.
I took a deep breath, and then answered her. "Well I wanted to make everybody from home, proud of me."
"So when you were in ruts, that's what pulled you through?"
"Oh no, God pulled me through." I answered. Cass had told me to bring up God if I could, even thought I didn't believe in there being a 'Christian God'
"Your religious then?"
"I try to be. I thank God everyday for my success. I sang mostly in churches too, so ya I guess you could say I'm religious." I smiled knowing I pulled it off perfectly.
"Have you ever thought you didn't need God?" She asked.
"Never." I retorted. "Even though right now I could probably get almost anything I wanted, I'm nothing with out him."
'What a Crock of Shit' was the only thing I could think.
"It's really nice to see someone at the top still be humble." She said warmly.
"It's the truth." I was referring to the 'I am nothing w/o him' thing I said. I was so cheesy.
"I know. Well we have to go to commercials." She looked into the camera. "When we get back we'll play 20 questions with Crist. So stay right there." A commercial for her show played, and then the crowd started up talking.
"All I'm going to do is ask you little question that we've received from your fans. Nothing big." she shrugged. "Just tedious. Is that okay?"
Like it would have mattered if I said no. "Oh sure. I don't mind at all." Which I didn't. I like answering questions like that.
"Good. We're not supposed to talk right now, so just wait a minute or two, okay?" She sat back as the make up people filled around her.
"Yep." They started to swarm around me too.
Someone yelled "30 Seconds!" The cosmeticians ran off, and the music started. The guy counted the 3, 2 thing, and then the red light on top of the camera came on.
Then she started. "Welcome back. If you just tuned in, we're talking to Christian Williamson. Well Crist are you ready for these questions?"
"As ready as I'll ever be." I smiled back.
"Okay, as you know, I'm going to ask a bazillion questions that your fans in the audience wanted to know the answers to."
"Alright." I knew all this, so she must have been repeating it for the home audience.
"First question, Are you really in love?"
"Let me guess, the person who asked that is a single female?" The audience laughed. "Yes. I really am in love. My girlfriend would kill me if I wasn't."
"First Romantic Kiss?" She continued with the questions.
"I was in New York and Jes was working for Jive. I asked her out, we had dinner and on the way back to her apartment, we just looked into each other's eyes, and the best kiss I've ever had followed." Well considering it was the only real kiss I've had, it would've been my best kiss. I've never had a boyfriend or had any sexual encounters with another man. I was a closet case to the max. Well Cass knew, but that was the only person.
"Love at first sight then?"
"You could say that." I replied. It probably would have been love at first sight if I had been straight. She was beautiful and had the greatest personality. If I was straight, I'd have been all over her like ugly on an ape.
"Does your music career have any strain on your relationship?"
"Not really. At least not now. I'm not touring, so I just stay in New York. We get to spend a lot of time together." I wish my career would break us up. That way it'd be easier on her when it finally did happen.
"So what do you do in your spare time?"
I smiled at how quickly she changed the subject. "I've started weightlifting since last month and I like that. Of course I like to sing wherever I can. Photography is fun. I watch tv listen to the radio..." I was trying to think of things.
"No sports ro parties?" She seemed a little shocked.
"I'm not really a sports person. I like to watch hockey and my sister's softball games, but that's it. I'm not a party person either. I don't drink and It's not really good for my voice to be talking in loud places. The thought of acting like an animal doesn't appeal to me very much." I was being truthful now. I liked elegant parties more. I guess an occasional, get wild party was okay, only if I was very loosened up before I went.
"So what sports do you hate and what kind of parties do you like?"
"Wow, that's a weird grouping if I ever saw one." I smiled at her. "I can't stand watching wrestling, swimming and basketball. I don't mind actually swimming though. Let's see... as far as parties go, I like formal ones. That's about it."
"Fair enough." She was satisfied with my answers.
"What about favorites?"
"Um... Foods, I love nachos with spicy cheese and bacon too, Color, a deep beautiful sky blue or hunter green. Car, viper. I wish I had one." She laughed a little at that. "Ah... bands... I love Ace of Base... BSB, Leanne Rhymes, Cher, Britney spears... What else is there?" I asked running out of ideas.
"Any subjects, tv shows, movies, books, etc..."
"Okay. I'm a huge Titanic Fanatic. I was in love with it before the movie and the musical came out, so of course Titanic is my favorite movie. Tv shows, MTV's TRL, Loveline, ah... Jay Leno, and of course Oprah. Books, I love all the Myst books. Uh... I need help again."
"I think you've covered enough." She sat down and laughed.
"Oh I thought I might have missed some."
"Nope. Okay, once audience member wanted to know if you're going to tour any time soon." She said reading the card in her hand.
"Well right now I don't have any plans. I would like to open for a group or do a joint tour. Find out what it's like for a while and then decide from there."
"Do you have any ideas of who'd you'd tour with?"
"Right now the touring this is just an idea."I answered. "Neither my agent or I have talked to anybody."
"Well who would you want to go with?" She was being persistent in this 'interrogation'
"I can't really say. I mean it might hurt my chances with those groups if I did."
"I understand. Okay, next question. What are your pet peeves?"
I stretched. "Oh Jeez, you asked for it now." She grinned knowing I was going to unload on her. "Well one of the things that gets on my nerves the most is people saying they're stupid, when they're not. I hate to see people put themselves down like that and it puts me in an awkward situation when they do that, which I don't like. Umm... another pet peeve is someone going through my things. That really burns me up. Let's see, I don't like when people try to talk with me when I'm in a crappy mood. Usually I want to be alone and I don't need all those questions. Oh ya, one of the things that gets on my nerves is when I'm tired or not happy and someone asks me 'what's wrong?'."
"Wow, that's a big list!" She proclaimed.
"Sorry..." I gave this worried face.
"Oh I asked what your pet peeves were. You answered my question." She responded shrugging. "So what kind of people or things don't you like?"
"I don't like stuck up people, and trust me you meet a lot of them in this business. I don't like people who think they're above the law. I'm not fond of people who drink excessively. Democrats get on my nerves, and I don't like Rap music."
"Short and quick. Your getting the hang of it."
"I'm trying" I smiled. All I wanted was for the questions to end. I was getting tired from it all.
"Ooo... here's a question that might become important if you ever break up with Jes... "What features in a girl do you like, and which do you not like?"
"Hmm... I haven't thought about this one lately. Well I like nice eyes and a nice smile and great hips too. But above all, if she doesn't have a nice personality, then it's over." Okay, that's what every gay man would say when they're given that question. But my answer was semi true, I mean those were the features I liked in men. "I'm not going to put up with 24 hour PMS. I don't like a woman smoking. It's dirty and very unattractive. I personally detest smoking. I really don't like a girl who's cocky either. Those are two of my biggest turn offs."
"You watch, the smoking rate in teenage girls will go down 50% now." Oprah joked.
"Hey, if it did, that'd be great." I was being serious.
"Yes it would. Well Crist, we're done." She smiled. "It was nice having you here and I hope you'll come back."
"Oh I will" 'Thank god it's over.' kept running through my mind as she said her closing. The camera's stopped, we got up, shook hands, and she told me the show would air tomorrow.
"Cool I'll get to watch it then." i said.
"Yep. Well thanks again for coming in on such short notice."
"Oh you're welcome. Any time you need a fill-in, give me a call."
"I'll remember that." She grinned evilly, then gave me a warm smile. "Well it was nice meeting you."
"Nice meeting you too. I guess I'll see you at the premier then?"
"Yes sir!" She exclaimed.
"Good." I saw Jes waiting for me. "I have to go. My girlfriend looks like she's getting mad. Bye."
"Bye."
"I signed a couple autographs and was out of there. I was beat. We went to the airport and got on to the plane to go back to New York. I slept the whole trip until we got into New York.
I gave Jes a kiss and then we split. She went back to her apartment and I went to mine. Of course when I got there, I crashed on the bed. I had practice the next day, all day, so I had to get some sleep. I stayed in bed all day and all night. ~~~
That same day the Backstreet Boys went on the Rosie show, which was odd considering that they'd be there again in about two weeks. But anyways, my name came up of course.
"So Brian, how's it feel to be the cutest member of the Backstreet Boys, according to Crist Williamson?" Rosie asked jokingly.
"Well it such an honor." He chose to take the sarcastic road rather than be serious and all. "It's not everyday that the newest star comes on a show and says your cute." All though he was acting like he was joking, he actually meant the words he was saying. Just as I had a couple day before.
"You've heard the rumors flying around about you and him?" She asked referring to the 'gay' thing.
"Ya. I heard them." he rolled his eyes. "Someone tries to have a little fun and then the tabloids exploit it into something it's not. I've never met him and anyways, I'm one of the straightest men you'll ever meet." Of course he was lying.
"I know what you mean." She said nodding. "Moving on... So what are you guys in New York for?"
Howie answered"We're putting finishing touches on our album, 'Millenium'"
"How long will you be here?"
Nick took it this time. "For about a month and a half. Then we go to florida to rehearse for the tour and then leave for Europe."
They talked for a couple more minutes about the Grammys, cut to commercial, came back and the boys did 'All I have to give' After the show they went back to the studio and worked for a couple hours. Then Nick and Brian went out to eat. They got to the restaurant and ordered. They sat there for a couple of awkward minutes starring at each other and then finally Brian spoke.
"Nick, I'll get right to the point. I can't go on like this anymore. I like you, but I don't love you and this relationship isn't working."
"I know. I feel the same way." Nick said sighing. "I'm not like mad or anything. I thought about this for a while and I just want out."
"Me too." Brian let out, relieved.
"So then the feeling is mutual." Nick sat for a moment thinking about what he just said. "We're over as lovers, but not friends."
"I guess so." Brian was serious.
Nick took a big breath. "Wow that wasn't as bad as I expected." He referred to the 'break up' "Oh ya, just one last thing, that night on the bus was the best I've ever had." Nick tried to lighten the mood, tried to make Brian feel a little better, but it did the opposite.
"I tried to make it that way, I knew it would probably be the last." Brian looked down at the table cloth as the tears in his eyes were about to let loose.
"Listen Frick, we'll always have each other as friends. We both knew that this was inevitable. So don't cry." Nick told Brian trying to get Brian from balling.
The thought of not being with Nick hadn't hit Brian until now. It was done, finished and that overwhelmed him. "I know. I know. I'm sorry. The thought of us not being a couple just washed over me for a second." He wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "I'm better now." Brian looked up and smiled, still with blood shot eyes.
"Good. Oh here comes the food." The waitress saw that Brian looked as if he had just got done crying.
"Are you okay sir?" She asked concerned.
"Ya I just swallowed something and it went down the wrong pipe." He made up an excuse.
"Well I'm glad you're okay." Then all of a sudden her eyes got really big. "Oh my..." She gasped. "You're from the Backstreet Boys." She really tried to keep from screaming. She looked at Nick then. "And you're Nick Carter. Oh... oh my god."
Nick blushed. "You caught me and this guy's name is Brian." He nodded toward Brian so she'd acknowledge him.
"Oh I'm sorry, I wasn't... I didn't know what you're name was." She said to Brian.
"That's quite alright. At least you know I was in the group. I've had people walk up to me and Nic and they'd ask where I was from."
She gave a nervous giggle "Well my name is Sharon and if you guys need anything at all, ya'll just get my attention when I walk by."
"Will do. It was nice meeting you , Sharon." Nick extended his hand to shake hers.
"Yes it was nice meeting you." Brian added as he shook her hand too.
"Thanks. Enjoy your meal." She smiled.
"I'm sure we will." Nick replied.
"Well bye." She nodded to each of them.
"Bye." The said in unison.
Nick talked first. "She was nice."
"You should go for her." Brian joked.
"Shut up." Nick laughed as he threw his napkin at Brian. "You know that you're free. You should go for Christian Williamson. Oh wait, Leigh-Anne wouldn't like that." Nick knew where to throw the most evil punch.
"Oh, that was low. She's probably wandering where I am. I haven't talked to her in days. But anyway, the media thinks that Chris and I are dating so..."
"I'm sure that his girlfriend doesn't like it either, you know, you two going out." Nick was enjoying this.
"He's got a girlfriend, he's not gay, so I don't have a chance. He is cute though." Brian admitted.
"Well everyone thinks we're straight." Nick made a good point.
"Ya, but... well I don't know what, but he doesn't have a high voice." That was the first thing to pop into Brian's head.
"Oh Brian, give it up. You know he doesn't do anything more than you to try to make the public think he's straight."
"You're right... Oh well, I guess I'll never know." Brian sighed. "Speaking of him, you still don't want to go to the premier of MG do you?"
"I already told you, I don't like those things." Nick said with a mouthful.
"Yeah, I know, but there's no harm in trying." Brian started to eat as well.
"They finished eating only talking about how good the food was. The mood was kind of awkward, and neither one of them could think of anything interesting to talk about. Once they were done, they paid the bill, got in a taxi and went back to the Plaza, their hotel.
"Do you think we should tell Kevin yet? What about your mom?" Nick asked on the elevator ride up to their floor.
Brian yawned. He was tired, and was definitely too tired to deal with Kevin. "Na, and anyway, my mom doesn't know about us. I never told her. We'll tell Kev tomorrow."
"Fine with me." Nick said as he pulled out his ID card to go to his room. "This is weird. I'm actually sleeping in my room." Nick laughed, knowing though, that it would be lonely.
"Nite Nick." Brian wasn't about to ask Nick in his room, although he knew that was what Nick was getting at.
"Night b-rok." Nick walked into his room, shutting the door behind him.
The next morning they both went down to Kevin's room for breakfast.
Nick noticed that Howie and AJ weren't there. "Where are the other two jokers?"
Kevin shrugged. "Still sleeping I guess. They went out clubbing last night, and I haven't seen them since they left. I hope they're here." Kevin laughed nervously.
Nick and Brian both made sighing 'oh well' faces, knowing that AJ and Howie did this sometimes. They sat down across from Kevin. Nick looked questionly at Brian. Brian knew Nick wanted to know if they should go ahead and tell them about they're break up. He nodded at Nick so Nick started."Kevin, we have something to tell you."
"You're getting married?" Kevin asked excitedly.
"Far from it cuz. We broke up." Brian said flatly.
"What?!?" Kevin was shocked.
"We just aren't made fore each other." Brian shrugged. "We're great as friends, not lovers."
"It was mutual, so we don't have any bad feelings or stuff like that." Nick added.
"I had no idea." Kevin stated, still taken back by the news.
"We drifted apart. That's all." Brian responded.
"If it's what you both want, then I'm all for it."
"It is, cuz. Right now I couldn't be happier. I mean, I want love, but I feel free. I like it."
"I couldn't be happier either." Nick added.
"Well I'm cool with it." Kevin said as he eat. "Hey call the other guys down."
"Sure." Brian got up and called down to each of their rooms. They got there ten minutes later and got what they were going to eat. When they were situated, Brian spoke. "Does anyone want to go to the Martin Guerre premiere?"
"I can't believe you're going. But no, I can't. I'm going out that night." AJ said.
"Me too." Kevin told Brian.
"Howie?" Brian asked desperately.
"I have an appointment at the doctor's. I can go the next day if you want."
Brian smiled at his friend's willingness. "That'd be great."
"Ya I'll go too. I don't have any plans for then. " Kevin said.
"Count me in bro." AJ declared.
Nick didn't say anything, and Kevin noticed, so he asked Nick, "You going Nick?"
"Ah... sure. What the hell, it might be fun."
"Wow this is so cool." Brian was really excited. "Hey do you guys mind if I turn on the TV to see if there's anything on about MG?" Nobody said anything, so he leaned over and turned it on. There was a commercial for Oprah on.
"Today on Oprah, Christian Williamson talks about everything from recent rumors to the Premiere of Martin Guerre." The announcer recited.
"I have to see that. I want to see what he says about him and me." Brian spoke out. "I want to know if I'd feel comfortable meeting him after the show."
"I still can't believe you'd go, and I really can't believe you'd want to meet him, man!" AJ proclaimed.
"You won't even get close to him." Kevin laughed. "There's going to be so many celebrities there, you'll be lucky to get a glance from him. They've pushed this premiere more than they would a movie's premier. Do you even have a ticket?"
"Of course I do. I got at least two for every night that we're here, and five for a majority of the nights. I knew someone who works in the theatre, so that's how I got them. And they're really good too. Two rows in, dead center." Brian told them in 'matter-of-fact' fashion.
"Wow!" Howie looked stunned.
"That's da bomb dude." AJ said chewing his food.
Just then the phone rang. It was David from the studio. He needed them all there.
AJ, Howie and Nick all went back to their rooms to get ready. Brian was ready to leave too, but Kevin kept him in. "Listen, don't go thinking you're going to steal his heart, Brian. You'll just get hurt. I know the way you are. When he doesn't show any interest in you because he's straight, you'll get all depressed, and in your condition, with all the medication you're taking, you really don't need that."
"I just want to meet him. Why do you think I want something more." Brian asked defensively.
"I saw your eyes when you turned on the TV and saw that commercial. I just don't want to see you get hurt. That's all." Kevin said trying to calm Brian down.
"I'm not going to get depressed. I'll be fine. Kev, I have to get ready. I'll see you in a couple minutes." Brian left and went down to his room to get ready.
They all met down in the lobby and as they went to get in the limo, they were mobbed. All of them managed to get in the limo, but it took forever the limo itself to get out. They were almost an hour late getting to the studio.
"Why are you so late? And why do you look like hell?" David, one of their main managers from The Firm, questioned when they got to the studio.
"Don't ask." Kevin said as he plopped down into a chair.
"Let's just say the security wasn't at its best." Howie added.
"Well we need to get a move on." David got and went into the control room. They guys went into the sound booth. They worked for a couple hours and then at four they were given a break. ~~~
Back to me, I woke up, had breakfast, and went to the theatre. I was well rested. Heck I hadn't slept that good in ages. I guess my goodnight's sleep showed too, because people kept telling me how good I looked. I didn't know a good sleep would make a person look better. Well anyways, we warmed up and then ran through the whole show, TWICE! It went well. We broke to eat at 5:00, so I missed my interview on Oprah. I was planning on buying the tape anyway, so I'd watch it then. I went out with a couple of guys, who were openly gay, for lunch. They kept saying I should be gay, to which I replied "I don't think so." I wish I could have told them I was gay, because I felt comfortable around them, but Cass said I couldn't tell a soul. Even my parents didn't know. She said it would kill my career. I knew it was true, but I couldn't do anything about that. And you know, that's such a shame too. Just because I like men, I could kill my career. And the most ironic thing about this whole deal is that mostly everybody in this industry is gay. Oh well, such is life. ~~~
"Hey I want to watch that interview on Oprah, so be quite guys." Brian said to Kevin and Nick who were in the lounge talking. Kevin gave Brian a disapproving frown.
Oprah came on the TV. When she brought me out, Brian had this gaze on his face that Kevin noticed. "Brian, don't do this to yourself."
"Kevin, please. Just let me be. I know you mean well, but you're really getting on my nerves." Brian responded in a pleading, crying, exhausted voice.
"Okay. I won't say another word." Kevin fell in to his cousin's request.
They both looked back at the TV. Oprah was just finished asking about the 't' at the end of 'Cris' in my nickname.
"I don't see why he doesn't just call himself Chris. When I meet him, I'm calling him Chris, not Crist." Brian retorted.
Oprah just finished saying she had paid a lot for the tickets. "Jeez, even Oprah's going to be there." Brian uttered.
"To turn the table on something more serious..." Oprah got somber really quickly.
"Oh God, here we go." Brian said. "I bet you any money she talks about the rumors." and she did to which I gave my explanation, then the commercials came on.
"He handled that very well." Nick was the first to speak.
"I told you he was straight." Kevin said.
"God Kevin. Cut it out. I'm still going to meet him, no matter what he says or you say. I'm not falling in love with him." 'Or am I?' Brian wondered in his mind. "I just want to meet the guy." He was getting really tired of Kevin.
Oprah came back on. While she and I BS'ed about me having a girlfriend and how much I loved her, Brian was getting depressed. The expressions on his face showed it. Then I talked about being religious. That crushed him.
Nobody at the table said a word when the commercials came on. Kevin and Nick both knew what kind of emotions were flying around in Brian's head. They felt bad for him , but if one of them would have said something he would have bitten their head off.
The show came back on and we went through that million question thing. Brian perked up a little, but was still depressed. "Well I can't wait to meet him" Brian said faking a smile. He had a teary glaze in his eyes. "He sounds like an interesting person." Brian tried to regain his composure, but was failing miserably.
Kevin shook his head disapprovingly. 'I can't believe Brian is getting so tangled up in this. Why in the world would he think that when he meets Christian, his life is going to change? He's going to get hurt, I can feel it now.' Kevin thought.
Brian got up and went back to the recording studio. The rest of the guys soon followed. They finished working at about 9:00 and left. Brian went straight to his room when the arrived, and cried himself to sleep. He had such high hopes of meeting me, and maybe getting somewhere, but that Oprah interview was such a blow to that dream, that he could barely take it. He didn't want to think I was straight, but apparently he was pretty convinced I was by the performance I gave. ~~~
Well after lunch I went back to the theatre. We rehearsed until 10:00. It was the most tedious and exhausting 4 hours of my life. The producers and directors nit-picked everything. I could have jumped up for joy when they said we could go home.
I got home and I was so beat that I didn't bother changing. I crawled on the couch in my living room and fell asleep. During the next two days I was at the theatre most of the time. The premiere was on the 1st and although no one wanted to work on the weekend, we needed the extra practice time. It was grueling, but worth it. ~~~
Brian stayed in his room over the weekend. He was too depressed to go out. All the guys dropped by his room at least once to try to cheer him up. None of them were successful. He just slept most of the time. It was the only way he could get away from the thought of me being straight. For some reason, he felt connected to me, even though he had never met me. That's why he was taking everything so hard.
The next day, the 1st of March was the day of the premiere. Things definitely got interesting...
What will happen at the premier? Will Brian and Crist fall in love at first sight? Will Kevin try to stop Brian? Will Brian be hounded by the tabloids for going to the Premier? Find out in the following editions of "Forbidden Love: The story of Brian and Crist"
Did you like it? Is it too slow? Anything you'd change? Have any thoughts on it at all? If so, email me at brianandcrist@hotmail.com
If you'd like to find out a little more about the story and things out side of the story, go to http://members.tripod.com/brianandcrist/ There's a spoiler section there as well as a very, very small FAQ. Check it out.
One last thing, I know some of the authors have been quite upset about other authors copying lately. I personally can only think of one or two times coming up that my story resembles another. And in those instances, it's a far stretch to compare them. But that's not why I'm writing this section.... If you're an author and you see a part of my story that you'd like to integrate into yours, be my guest. I'm not going to act like I have a bug up my butt and say "Do not copy or use any concepts from this work." I've spent a good deal of time trying to get this story together, so anybody wanting to use an idea is flattering. If you want to take a concept, go ahead. Of course change it around a little bit to fit your story, but other than that, have fun. I'm not cashing in on this story, or anything, so it really doesn't bother me.
And finally, the ultimate question of all... To be continued? Of course! I have the next chapter typed out already! You'll see it in about a week.