I deeply apologize for this one being so long you guys! I had a midterm that kicked my ass and spare time. So I hope you all enjoy this one, little longer, tad bit steamier and much more to come. I have a ton of ideas and I love hearing from you all! Please keep letting me know what you think: corey_246@yahoo.com
This is fictional work, not based off of real life. If your under 18 you know the drill, do not read further. If this is illegal in your country/state do not continue.
The Forbidden Love of a High School Boy: Chapter 3
I sat on the floor of the shower, my back against the tile which was gradually growing colder as the minutes went on. The water was even colder but it didn't seem to matter. There was nothing left, I had no more energy, my run in with Jared had done me in. I couldn't keep up with this constant game of cat-and-mouse with my feelings. They always caught up to me, each time hitting me harder and harder. I was not going to fight them off any longer. Do what they may to me, it's too much effort to actually attempt and fight them off. Would I tell Jared the truth? Probably not. How could I? It would destroy our friendship, possibly my relationship with Luke if Jared told him, and lets face it why wouldn't he...
A knock on the door shook me back to reality, I looked up through the glass door. Someone knocked again. What if it was Jared?
"Alex honey, are you alright?" my mother called through the door.
"Yes mom.. I'm fine, just feeling a little sick" I forced out. Speaking hurt. So did lying. Way to much work covering something so innocent up. Was it innocent anymore though... this was beyond the normal classification of innocent. This had its own. I sighed, I was cold. My body shivered under the water..
"Do you want me to get your father?" she called through the door..
"No, I'll be fine really" I called as I stood up, turning off the water.
"Ok, good thing, you probably look like a prune now" she laughed and I heard my bedroom door close behind her. I climbed out, happy she was gone. We were always raised with a good amount of space, I was happy for this now. I grabbed a towel from the towel bar next to the shower and began to dry myself off, enjoying the coolness of my skin in the hot air.. I turned the radio down a bit after wrapping the towel around my waist. I wandered to the mirror over the sink, and found that color was coming back to my face a little. I sighed and turned around, leaning against the counter. Looking around the room I realized I felt safe inside the bathroom. Distant. I went and sat down on the edge of the Jacuzzi tub and sighed, my head hanging down. My mind was blank of everything but Jared. You're going to have to face him eventually. You can't hide in here forever.
I stood and walked out of the bathroom into my room, it was hotter in here. I walked to the double doors and shut them just as Jared looked up at me from the back gate carrying more wood. I quickly shut them and turned, heading over to the fan across the room. I turned it on and went over to my closet. I dropped the towel into the hamper inside, pulling on my boxer-briefs I already felt the sweat slowly building up on my body. I frowned, heat wave? Maybe school would be cancelled, boy that would be nice. I could hide away in my room then, never having to see Jared. Play sick.
"No point hiding" I said aloud, I pulled on a white muscle shirt and slid on a pair of jeans. I walked out into the my bedroom towards the door,
"Your going to have to face this anyways, might as well deal with it..." I began to open the door. "...later" I said shaking my head and shut it again.
I awoke on the floor, laying below the fan, the air conditioner must have been on, my arms slowly had goose bumps crawling their way up. I stood up and looked around. Next to me laid my science book, no wonder I had fallen asleep. Studying plus this heat. I picked it up and tossed it onto my bed. Next to me on the floor was a note, I picked it up...
"Alex, Dad got called into work and I need to go help Aunt Karen move, we won't be home until late because it's date night (keep Luke in-line). We're driving into LA so don't wait up, love Mom"
Below were the numbers to call in case of emergency. If they were helping aunt Karen and going out they won't be back until way after dinner. Easier to hide. But harder, Luke won't buy some sick story. I sighed and tossed the note into a ball and threw it into the garbage can as I walked by it. I left my room, venturing out into the hallway, I felt ridiculous, sneaking around like this what was the point?
I walked down the stairs and into the main entrance, through the arched doorframe into the living room I could see Kaci my sister watching TV with her friend. I looked through the doorway slowly next to the landing into the study but it was empty. I could hear no hammering now, maybe they went out?
"Kaci where's Luke?" I asked, leaning against the doorway. She didn't looked back at me.
"I don't know... Luke!" she shouted out.
"Kaci no!" I hissed at her, her friend giggled. Luke up from behind me and grabbed me by the waist, I let out a yell and fought back. I looked around wildly but there was no Jared. Luke swung me over his shoulder, why was he wet? No, the pool!
I was already on the deck unable to escape his grasp and he laughed out.
"Sleeping beauty has awoken" he called out, I knew who he was informing.
"Luke don't!" I yelled out, knowing the thoughts in his mind. I knew him far too well he just laughed. I looked down to see the grass was now gone, it was the cobblestone that surrounded the poolside.
"Dude, let him go" said a familiar voice. NO! Not how I wanted to face him, I scream in my head.
"Ok..." said Luke, suddenly I was in the water, below it really. I surfaced treading the water coughing.
"You asshole" I gasped out, I would not looked behind me. Luke suddenly dove in and surfaced below me, picking me up and tossing me with ease. He was built much like Jared, just didn't look near as appealing.
I surfaced once again and swam to the edge and spat out some water. I shot back a glare at Luke who was closer than I thought, I went to climb out but was pulled back under the water. Elbowing him in the gut I surfaced and found myself face to face with Jared. I could feel my face go red. Hard to hide in a pool that was so cool. He smiled at me, but looked hurt as I backed away. Why is he hurt? A strong twinge of guilt struck my stomach as I looked into his eyes. I could feel tears begin to sting my eyes. I began to swim into the shallow end and walked out, up the stairs. Drenched, my white shirt clung to my body tightly, my already tight jeans seemed to mold themselves to every inch of my body. I shook my head and looked at Luke, ready to call a few more names since I could away with it being parents free. But I saw Jared's face first. He was watching me closely. His eyes did not move from me, his eyes looked almost empty and cold. I turned
quickly, finally gathering the courage to move and began for the house.
"Dude lets go grab a drink", said Luke, Jared looked away and I felt free, I took my chance to quickly walked away. I quickly walked up the lawn towards the house, to my left I could see the beginning of a gazebo being built, the heat must have gotten to them, that and once dad left all work ethic from Luke probably went to an all-time low.
Behind me I could hear Luke laughing as a beach ball came flying past my head, I ignored him and stormed into the house and up to my room as fast as I could with out falling. I left a trail of water behind me but I didn't care. I stormed into my room, slamming the door behind me. I reached behind me and locked the door, and leaned back against it and dropped down until I reached the floor. I sat against it, my chest heavy, I let out a low gasp as I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. Tears began to run down my cheeks. I let out another gasp and finally let go. My body trembled as I finally let out everything, every bit of pain and hatred brought up from all of this. The pain of these feelings, the hatred I had for myself. I wiped the tears form my cheeks and stood up with a sigh, I went to the bathroom and stripped my soaked clothing, carelessly tossing them into the tub. I walked back out into my room, my mind racing with thoughts. My emotions leaping back and forth between anger, pain and sheer embarrassment. Cursing Luke in my mind I changed into a dry blue t-shirt and jeans which I zipped up as I walked from my closet. As I did my cell phone began to vibrate on my desk. I walked over and flipped it open to find a text message from Katy. Perfect, I thought.
"Hope you remembered I'm coming over today! I'm three blocks away", the message read. I tossed my cell down and left my room out into the hallway heading downstairs, I stopped on the third last step and sat down.. Katy was one of my best friends, and defiantly the only person who new the truth about who I was. She also, thankfully, knew about Jared. Finally someone who I could talk to about this, someone who may be able to help me.
After a few minutes of waiting the doorbell rang and as I stood up I realized the hammering was on again outside. I opened the door and Katy stood there and instantly looked concerned. Her eyes traced my face, knowing her she knew something was wrong, she knew me far to well.
"What's wrong" she asked coming in, she took my arm with a hand and shut the door behind her with the other. I looked at her blankly, even the thought of saying his name was pushing me closer to the edge.
"He's here..." I whispered, and she smiled.
"So? Isn't that a good thing?" she asked.
"No..." but her attention was now focused over my shoulder. I turned to see Jared standing in the kitchen, in all his glory. His body glistened in the sun from the sweat that clung to his chest and arms. Finally, while being lost in his looks, I noticed he was holding his hand, his face creased with pain.
"I'll be in your room", whispered Katy, she winked at me as she bounced up the stairs. I walked into the kitchen with a sigh. You can do this, I told myself.
"Are you ok?" I asked, trying not to focus on his body.
"Um, ya..." he winced, he was holding his thumb, "... Luke decided I should hold the nail. His aim sucks" he laughed, looking at me, I looked away quickly.
"I think we have an ice pack, here..." I said, walking to the fridge and opening the pullout freezer on the bottom. I pulled out the ice pack and looked back up to Jared's face. His eyes were on me, that same look of concern on his face.
"Can we talk?" he asked, as I handed him the ice pack, avoiding his touch as much as possible without being obvious.
"Um... ya sure," I said, once again avoiding his gaze, "...how's the gazebo coming?" I asked, forcing myself to smile and look at him quickly.
"You know what I want to talk about," he sighed, "...but it's coming along fine" he said. "I'm sorry" he whispered, standing up. This caught my attention and I looked at him frowning.
"Sorry... sorry for what?" I asked, his eyes were intense.
"I'm sorry I disgust you" he said, his face was clear and calm, but his eyes were deep and distant. I could feel the sorrow that was in them, I took in a sharp breath.
"You... you don't" I stammered, I was dumbfounded, how could he ever think I was disgusted by him?
"What you saw... don't lie to me please Alex. I've seen how you're acting, I saw your face that day. You looked horrified, your avoiding me, won't talk or look at me... I disgust you... and I'm sorry for that. I understand you probably hate me, please just... don't tell Luke. I'll just... stay away from you" he sighed, his eyes seemed to be glazed over with tears, he took a deep breath, gazing down at his hand.
"I'm not... Jared it's so far from disgust" I gasped out, he just looked at me. His eyes seemed to be trying to look right into me. Grasping for some pinch of truth from within me. But he must not of found any, he turned from me, and left me standing there frozen in place. I took a deep breath and left the kitchen and walked up the stairs to my room, my feet leading the way. I stepped into the room, the tears finally erupting from my eyes, gliding aimlessly down my cheeks. How could he think I hated him, that I could possibly be disgusted?
"Alex what's wrong?" gasped Katy, she was sitting on my bed playing with her long brown hair. I walked to the bed after pushing the door shut. I fell onto it next to her and she pulled me into a hug.
"He... he thinks I hate him... that I'm disgusted by him" I spat out, my words were drenched in disbelief, in shock.
"What?" she asked surprised, she studied my face, tears fell silently as I tried to keep myself calm. "Alex, what's going on?" I told Katy the story, leaving nothing out. She sat there silent, her eyes growing wide as I told her of Jared and the boy below the bleachers, the long spiral down that had possessed me since Friday. She laid with me on the bed until I felt all my feelings and emotions were out, mostly babbling I told her everything that came to mind, how truly in love I was with Jared, and how truly hurt I was because of it.
Katy stayed with me till it was late, and finally needed to go home for work the next day, she made me eat before she left, and I wandered upstairs to my bed. I stripped down to my boxers and crawled into bed. Outside it was dark, and at last a gentle, cooler breeze drifted in. I left the doors open to the deck, and drifted off.
I woke up to my bed moving, next to me Jared sat looking at me intensely. His eye burned into mine slowly as I sat up, I could see he worse only boxers, his skin seemed to glow in the dim light. He leaned forwards towards me, I opened my mouth to speak, but his finger came to my lips, tracing my bottom lip. My body seemed to go numb from his touch. He removed his finger from my lips, and leaned in quickly. His lips brushed mine lightly, I took in a staggered breath.
"Alex" he whispered, and pushed his lip against mine again, his tongue slowly traced my bottom lip, and slipped into my mouth. I sighed as his hands traced my chest to my back. I tossed the covers back as he straddled me, and laid atop of me. His chest met mine as I moaned into our deep kiss. I gasped for air quickly as his kisses traced down my jaw to my neck, his tongue traced my neck followed by his lips. My skin was hot following his touch, I needed more. I kissed him again as he slipped his body between my legs, I wrapped them around them as my tongue rubbed against his slowly, his hands slipped under my body, slowly massaging my ass, pulling down my boxers. His mouth opened wider now, more desperate more of his tongue slipped into my mouth. I moaned , my eyes closing as Jared began to rub himself against me, my hands roamed his chest. My eyes suddenly shot open as a chuckle came from somewhere in my room. I sat up as I saw a figure standing near the end of my bed. The figure walked into the light and I saw a face I recognized. The boy. The boy Jared was kissing, he stood there smiling. Grinning, his eyes vicious as they traced my exposed body.
"Nope, not as good as you" said Jared smiling back at the boy, who let out a laugh. I could my eyes water, my mouth open unable to speak. The two laughed as Jared climbed off of me, and walked over to the boy, while placed his hands on Jared chest. I closed my eyes, I couldn't... how could Jared do this? I could hear the sounds of kissing, heavy breathing, soft moans. I could feel the tears begin to slip from my eyes.
I awoke suddenly, a light sweat had built up on my body. I tossed back the sheet and looked at the clock to my left, it was 2am. I then heard a creak on my other side. I looked over and sat up quickly to find Jared was standing at the doors. He walked into my room slowly, the moonlight shone around him.
"I'm sorry...", he whispered, "...I didn't think I'd wake you up" he said. He was shirtless, he stood in lounging pants, he must have been spending the night. I could faintly hear the TV going in Luke's room now, also his loud snoring.
I sat there silent, looking at his face. It was calm, his features serious but gentle. His strong jaw was set, his eye brows down, frowning slightly, deep in thought.
"You not disgusted..." he said slowly, "... your avoiding me and not talking to me because its hard for you. It was shock that day, not because of what I am. But because you never knew...", I nodded, his words were heavy and his words were paced, careful. He sat on the edge of the bed, far from me. He sat in the moonlight, the pale glow set on his bare skin. "You don't hate me, because you understand... you aren't disgusted because you... you understand. I was far from it..." my words from his lips brought back the pain from his words in the kitchen that afternoon. "I was far from it, because you..."
"Love you..." I finished his sentence. I quickly shut my mouth, did I say it? I stopped breathing, as did he. I could not look at him, I was afraid to, but I still could not look away. His face was at peace, but like stone did not move. Locked to mine, his eyes shone bright as he sat in the pale moonlight. And in all the fear I felt in that moment, I could still not denounce how truly beautiful he was.