Forever

Disclaimer ----------

Hell, you've been readin' it for this long, you may as well keep on goin'!

And now...'Forever'...

Chapter 94

"You even try to get outta the bed, young man, and you'll regret it," I threatened.

"Come on, D," Kev whined back. "I've been cooped up in this hospital room for over two weeks. I gotta get outta here."

"I don't care, Kev. You're in no shape to go wandering around," I told him. "Besides, I won't have the entire nursing staff and half the patients trailing behind you trying to get a look at that cute butt of yours through your gown." He didn't even crack a smile at my joke.

"Dylan," he started again. "Doc Jacobson said I could leave my room."

"Kevin," I replied, mimicking his firm tone. "Doc Jacobson said you could take a brief tour around the hospital IF you were in a wheelchair."

"So," I continued, "turn yourself back onto that bed and stay there. If you wanna leave so bad, I'll go get a wheelchair." He gave me a pouty look, but he turned himself in the bed so his legs were no longer dangling off of the side.

I turned and walked out of the room, shaking my head. It was Monday afternoon. Kevin had been steadily improving again for the last several days. He was still weak, and there was still a lot of pain, but he was much more focused when he was awake. And he was starting to get really antsy to get out of there.

I didn't really blame him. Kev had long been a very active person, into working out and being outdoors. Since getting knifed over two weeks ago, he'd been in bed. It had to be driving him crazy.

"How's the patient, Dylan?" Dr. Jacobson's voice came from behind me. I turned around to talk to him.

"He's bein' ornery, Doc. Wants to take a walk around the place," I told him.

"Well, that's to be expected. And, it's actually a pretty good sign that he's wanting to get active again," he told me. "But, he shouldn't be walking around. He'll tire pretty easily, no matter how stubborn he's being. You can't let him push himself too hard."

"I know," I said. "I got him to agree to wait until I found him a chair." I stopped, considering an idea.

"Say, Doc, would it be ok to wheel him up to the roof? I think it'd be good for him to get outside for a few minutes, but we can't go out on the ground floor. Too many fans."

"Yes, I think that could be arranged," he nodded before turning to walk over to the nurses' station. Within moments, I had a wheelchair in hand and was pushing it back to Kev's room.

"Alright, Kev," I said as I pushed into his room. "Here's a chair, and Doc Jacobson said it was cool to take you up to the roof. He was also good enough to show me how to get your chair up there."

"Finally," he breathed a heavy sigh.

I wheeled the chair over to his bed, then parked it next to the frame. I locked the wheels before turning to Kev and helping him ease around on the bed. He stood up, gently putting his weight on his legs. They were a little shaky, but I steadied him until he was able to sit down.

"Let's go, James," he said to me, apparently deciding I would be his chauffeur. I moved in behind and pushed him out of his room.

"I really appreciate this, D," he said, taking a deep breath as we relaxed on the roof.

Doctor Jacobson had shown me a different route to the roof, one that had elevator access for Kev's chair. It was also more of an observation area, so `civilians' were allowed there. Actually, a few of the other patients had even approached Kevin for an autograph, which he gladly provided.

Kev was still in his chair, facing out over the edge of a guard railing. I was sitting on the concrete ledge, leaning back into the rail and just watching him enjoy being outdoors again.

"No prob, baby," I replied, reaching out to take one of his hands. "I know you're goin' a little stir-crazy in there."

"Yeah, definitely. It's getting so claustrophobic," he told me.

"Well, the doc says you can get out of the hospital in another week or so. We'll just have to take a walk or two a day until then so you have a chance to get some air," I said.

"Where're the other guys at?" he asked. I wasn't sure I should tell him, as I didn't know how much the guys had shared.

"They're doing some work in the studio, actually," I said slowly. He nodded his head.

"That's right. Bri told me the other day that they were gonna do some background tracks," he said. He sighed deeply, then. "I can't wait to get back in there. I hate how this is gonna delay everything. The fans have already waited so long."

"Kev, the fans'll wait a little longer," I said. I smiled. "Trust me, I'm one of `em who's been waiting so long, remember?" He chuckled.

"That's true. But you're compensated cause you can spend time with me," he informed me with a superior little grin on his face.

"Oh, I get to date the glamorous and spectacular Kevin Richardson, so I shouldn't have any desire to hear new music from my second favorite group?" That brought him up short.

"Second favorite?" He got an irritated look on his face. "Who's your favorite?"

"'NSync, of course," I replied. I even managed to keep a straight face for a moment before I broke up laughing. But, the chagrined look on his face ended my serious moment.

"It's so easy to tweak you, baby. I'm sorry, I couldn't resist," I told him. He just shook his head at me.

"It's not nice to tease a wounded man, D," he said.

"Well, I'm sorry. You KNOW you and the guys are my favorite group, if for no other reason than you're all my family," I said, still smiling at him. He got a serious look on his face.

"That's the first time you've ever said that," he said softly.

"Said what?" I wondered.

"Said that the guys and I are your family. You didn't say `like family' or qualify it in some way. You just said we're family," he told me. I hesitated, a little embarrassed at how he was taking it.

"Well, isn't that what you wanted?" I asked.

"Of course, D. We all consider you family already. It's nice to hear you agree."

"It'd be tough not to consider you and the others my family after everything we've gone through together. The guys helped me deal with you getting hurt. That alone brought us closer than I would've thought possible in such a short time," I said.

I brought his hand to my cheek, closing my eyes and resting against it. His skin was warm against mine. It was nice to feel the life in him again.

"How're you doin' now that you're not working, sweetie?" he wondered. I opened my eyes and glanced up at him.

"Frankly, it's weird, Kev. I mean, I haven't had much time to worry `bout it since I'm here with you and stuff. But it still feels like...like walking the tightrope without a net," I said.

"I'll always be there to catch you, love," he whispered to me. I blushed at the sentiment, but it still sent a warm feeling coursing through me. I closed my eyes and leaned into him again.

"I love you, Kev," I whispered, so softly I wasn't sure he'd hear me.

"I love you, too, D," he replied just as softly. "Forever."

We sat outside for something like an hour. The warm LA sun shone down on us, keeping us warm. There was just the slightest of breezes here, which kept us from getting too hot.

"You ready to head inside, yet?" I asked him. I didn't want to push him to go, as I knew he wanted to be out of his room.

"Yeah, I think I'm ready to head back. Just promise me we can do this again."

"Of course," I replied. "We'll do it at least once a day."

I stood and moved behind his chair. I turned him around, wheeling him towards the entrance to the hospital. He reached behind himself and put a hand on my arm. I leaned down and quickly kissed behind his ear.

"Hope you enjoyed the time, Kev," I whispered in his ear.

"I'm with you, D. There's no way I couldn't enjoy that," he said softly. I swear I was in a state of constant blush that day.

We made our way back inside and down to Kev's floor. I took my time, knowing he probably wasn't that anxious to get back into bed. We arrived at his door a few minutes later. I didn't even notice how dark it was until I pushed open the door.

"SURPRISE!!" came about a dozen voices all at once.

I just about had a heart attack as the lights came up and Lindsay and the guys came rushing up to me. Not only was I totally shocked, but I also had no idea what they were talking about.

"Um," I began. "What's goin' on?"

"Don't tell me you actually forgot!" Lindsay chided me. I just kind of gave her a dumbfounded look. I was pretty much clueless.

"Maybe this'll help," Howie said, pushing his way to the front. He stared into my eyes. "Think back on what happened about 27 years ago...today."

"Oh God," I said, finally remembering what today was.

"Happy Birthday, D," Kev's voice came from behind me.

"I can't believe you forgot your own birthday, old man!" Nick joked, lightly punching me in the shoulder.

"Hey, I'm still not as old as Kevin, Nick!" I shot back. Kevin kicked the back of my leg for that remark.

"In the old man's defense," Howie spoke up, "he has been a little busy lately."

"Thanks, Howie," I said, giving him a little bow. "Spoken like the true friend you are. Unlike this character." I elbowed Nick.

"Did his surprise get here, yet?" Kev asked from my side.

"Yep," Nick replied. "In the bathroom."

"Oooooh, goody! I can't wait to see it," I told them. Brian walked over to the door to Kevin's bathroom and opened it.

"Surprise, Dylan!" Kris' voice came to me a second before she and Jeremy came out of the bathroom.

"Kris!" I moved over to give her a hug. "Jer, it's good to see ya," I told him, shaking his hand.

"Well, Brian called us a few days ago and arranged to get us flown down here for a short visit," Kris told me. "Seems you've been a little too busy to keep in touch with us." I blushed at her light scolding.

"Sorry, Kris," I apologized. "Things've been a little crazy."

"A little?" Nick spoke up.

"Ok," I smiled. "A LOT crazy. I just have one question, though." I paused, turning to look over at the guys. "How'd y'all know it was my birthday?"

"Well, lucky for you, I'm really good at remembering these kinds of things," Lindsay said. I raised an eyebrow at her, as I knew I'd never told her what date my birthday was. "Ok, you caught me! I got it off of your medical chart a while back when you were in the hospital."

"Sneaky, Linds," I told her, shaking my head. "Very sneaky. And slightly unethical?" She didn't even bat an eye. I was impressed.

"Well, there's more sneakiness to come," Kev spoke up again. "Cause your surprise isn't quite through." I turned to look a question at him just before the last voice I'd ever expected to hear spoke up.

"Hello, Dylan," my mother said as she stepped out from the bathroom.

Chapter 95

I stared at her.

The silence in the room grew. No one spoke. I'm not sure anyone even breathed. I know I didn't.

I stared some more.

She looked the same as she had at Dad's funeral. Beautiful, thick black hair, with barely a trace of gray to show for her 50 years. My own eyes, staring back at me. Little lines around her eyes and mouth betrayed how rough the last six months had been.

I felt a surge of emotions in my body. Happiness at actually seeing her here. Fear over what she would do to me next. Anger over what she had already done. The anger was easily the strongest, overwhelming everything else.

I turned away, staring over at my lover still sitting in his chair just a few feet away. Our eyes met. He flinched a little then. I could only guess he wasn't ready for my anger.

"You knew?" I asked, my voice harsh and subdued. He just nodded.

"Was it your idea?" I asked him.

"No," Ann spoke up. I snapped over to look at her, my eyes stormy with anger. She simply stood there, weathering the storm, calm and collected as she stared back.

"It was my idea, Dylan," she continued.

"You had no right," I began.

"I had every right, Dylan," Ann replied, a firm note creeping into her voice. "She's your mother. I know what it feels like to be in her position." Her voice softened then as she walked over and placed a hand on my shoulder. I stiffened, but she didn't withdraw.

"Dylan, whether you'll admit it or not, the separation is hurting you. That means it's hurting Kevin, too. And I won't have either of you hurting if there's something I can do about it."

"We all make mistakes," she said softly. "I made them with Kevin. Your mom made them with you. Please," she pleaded, "give her a chance to make things right."

Another hand touched my shoulder then. I turned to see my own eyes looking back at me. There was sorrow there. And pain. And...concern?

"No," I said, my voice cracking with emotion. "I can't do it again." I turned back to Ann. "I won't let her do that to me again."

I shook off both of their hands and moved to the door. Kevin said my name, but I ignored him. Howie put his hand out to stop me, but I just sidestepped him and walked out of the room.

I looked out over the ocean, listening to the waves crash on the shore. The sun had set, and the moon was beginning to rise over the dark waters of the Pacific.

I was back where this began. Back on the beach where Kevin and I'd been walking that night. Back where my life had changed. Again.

I didn't know what'd drawn me here. Maybe it was Nick's love of the ocean invading my soul. Maybe it was a need to understand what'd happened to Kevin...to me. Or maybe I just needed to run from the anger for a while.

I'd pretty much lost track of everything that day. I'd left Kevin's room, found my car, and driven away. I'd eventually ended up here, at the beach. I'd been sitting here for a while, watching the crowds thin out as the sun went down. I was pretty much alone now.

My mind was wrapped around thoughts of my mother. I wanted so badly to trust her, to let her back into my life. I hated feeling like I'd given up my family in order to be with Kevin. There was no resentment to Kevin for that feeling, but I still had it.

Could I trust her again? Could I take the chance one more time? It'd been five months since I'd told her she should make the next move. It'd taken a long time, but she was making a move. Was it enough? I sighed. I was so confused at that moment. A tear slid down my cheek.

"What've we got here?" a familiar, sarcastic voice cut through the night.

Chapter 96

A chill ran down my spine as I realized where I'd heard that voice before. I slowly turned, praying that I was wrong. My prayer went unanswered.

It was him...the man who'd led the gang that attacked us that night. I quickly got to my feet to face him. He only had two of his friends with him this time. But, I was alone, on a deserted beach, and there were three of them.

My heart began to race. The breaths were coming into my body faster and faster as I stared at my attackers. The fear began to build.

"Well, well. It's one o' those little faggots we had some fun with a few weeks back," the leader said, apparently recognizing me in the moonlight.

"Nice o' ya to come back, faggot," he sneered. "Me and the boys were in need of a good time tonight."

"Yeah," the one to the leader's left said. He was a big guy, easily over six feet, with a lot of meat on his frame. He reached behind his waist and pulled out a knife. "Maybe I can finish the job I started on his little fairy boyfriend. I could use the practice."

I'd never understood the expression `seeing red' in the past. I'd always thought it was just a figure of speech. I never realized you could actually see red.

When that kid said those words, I saw red. Literally. The world took on a reddish hue. The light of the moon turned the waters of the Pacific into blood where it reflected. I felt rage like I'd never felt before.

This was the kid who'd hurt Kevin. This was the kid who'd nearly killed the man I love. This was the kid who'd put me through hell on earth these past weeks.

And this was the kid stupid enough to admit it to my face when I was already angry at the world.

I don't know what happened next. I found myself standing where the kid with the knife had been a moment before. He was now on the ground at my feet, his face bloody.

Someone hit me. Again and again. But it didn't hurt. There was no pain anywhere in my body. All I could feel was the rage...the anger...the hatred toward these children...these children who'd dared to try to take Kevin from me.

A moment later, I was facing another direction, and there was another body at my feet. But someone was still hitting me.

I turned again, and another body hit the sand. Then, the first guy was back on his feet. And we fought. He hit me, but it didn't hurt. I started to laugh in his face. He couldn't hurt me. But I could hurt him.

The next thing I know, he was on the ground. I was straddling him, pummeling his face with my fists. He wasn't fighting back anymore, but I continued to hit him. Until a voice spoke in the night.

"Dylan, man, come on!" I knew I should recognize the voice, but I was too deep in my own world to figure out who it was. Two sets of arms grabbed me from either side and pulled me off of the kid. I struggled, trying to get back.

"NO!" I yelled at those who'd grabbed my arms. "He tried to kill Kevin...tried to take him away...should pay!"

"No, Dylan," another voice said, this one with a soft Southern accent. "Not like this."

The red finally faded. The world shifted, and I was back in it again. I turned to one side and saw who was holding my arm.

"AJ?" I asked, recognition finally dawning. I turned to the other side. "Brian?" The rage dissolved...the pain from the beatings finally rushed in...and the only color I saw then was black.

I don't know how much later it was when I woke up. I could feel sand under me, so I knew we were still on the beach. There was a soft hand stroking my face. I opened my eyes to see a set of piercing blues looking back at me.

"Brian?" I asked, a load of questions in that single word.

"It's ok, Dylan," he said quietly. "You're gonna be fine. The cops are on their way to pick up the guys who attacked you."

His words cleared the fog in my head. I remembered the attack, then. Parts of it, anyway.

I tried to push myself up. It hurt a lot, but I managed to get into a sitting position so I could look around.

The three guys who'd attacked me...or who I'd attacked, I guess...were sitting a short distance away. Tom was standing guard over them, his gun present in his hand.

AJ was standing off by himself, staring out over the ocean. He was obviously deep in thought. I could almost hear his mind from where I was sitting. I hoped he was ok.

"How'd you guys find me?" I asked, turning to Brian again.

"Tom followed when you left the hospital," he explained. "He's been leery of letting you out of his sight since the attack. When you got here and looked like you were staying awhile, he called us and let us know how you were."

"AJ decided to come and talk to you, try to help. I came along to see if there was anything I could do. After all," he paused, "we're family, right?" I just stared into his eyes a moment before nodding.

I moved to stand then. It took a bit of effort, but I managed to get to my feet. I was pretty sore all over, and I guessed I'd probably be even sorer tomorrow. The thugs had gotten in more shots than I'd originally thought. I walked over to AJ.

"AJ?" I asked, my voice soft so I wouldn't startle him. He sighed before turning to me.

"You alright, DJ?" he asked.

"A little sore, but I'll be fine," I replied. "What is it, AJ? You seem...sad?" He sighed again.

"Just...just feelin' the loneliness, I guess," he said softly. "Kev's so lucky to have you, Dylan. I wish I was half as lucky."

I reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. I applied a little pressure to get him to turn and look at me. Then I slid my arms around him and gave him a hug.

"You've got me, too, AJ. I'll always be there for you when you need me. I'll always be your friend," I whispered as I held him. "And, you'll find the right person some day. Until then," I paused, sliding out to meet his gaze, "you'll just have to make do with us."

He smiled slightly and nodded. We turned and walked over to Brian and Tom, then. I left my arm around his shoulder. He seemed like he needed a friend. And at that moment, so did I.

We stood there, talking. I didn't say much. The reality of what'd happened tonight came crashing in pretty hard. I was hurting all over. I was tired. And I wanted this to just be all over.

The police showed up a short time later. They questioned everyone pretty thoroughly. Tom had to show his concealed weapons permit and various other pieces of ID that proved he was ok to be carrying a gun.

The police were actually pretty gentle with me. I knew I must look pretty horrible if they were taking it so easy. In the end, they told me I could come in the next day and give a full statement. The three would be held on assault charges. The man who'd knifed Kevin would be held for attempted murder.

I climbed into the Grand Prix on the passenger side. AJ'd volunteered to drive us back. I couldn't believe I was letting him drive my car, but I was so tired and sore that it didn't matter.

When we arrived at the hospital, I didn't move. AJ came around and opened the door, guiding me out of the car and inside. We made our way to the elevators and started up to Kev's room.

AJ opened the door and ushered me inside. It was pretty much empty except for Kevin and Ann. No one else was there. Kevin gasped when he saw me. That was confirmation that I looked as bad as I felt.

"My God, D, what happened?" he asked from his bed.

I didn't say anything. My mind was in a fog, and I was starting to shut down. I walked over to his bed and climbed on next to him. I curled myself around him as much as I could, still conscious of his wounds.

"D?" he asked, still wondering what was going on.

"AJ, tell him," I said, just before the tears started to fall. A few moments later, I drifted off, breathing in the scent of Kevin as AJ told him the events of the day.

Author's Notes --------------

Just to update everyone, I'm pencilling the end of the series this weekend. Actually, I may finish the last chapter tonight or tomorrow morning. It's looking like the ending will fall on Chapter 124, so you got a little extension over what I said earlier.

I've had a lot of requests to continue this series, and I've had a lot of people wondering if I would write anything else. All I can say for now is "I don't know." Between setting up a life and now Cherokee, my time's pretty much filled up. Plus, I'm kind of tapped out on where I could take this series and/or where I would take a separate series. I can say that, if I did something else, it would probably not be a Kevin story. As much as I love the guy, writing about him has become too difficult.

Hope everyone's still enjoying, and hold on for the end.

DJ