Forever

Hey, fellow Nifty Readers. Here's the next sections of Forever. I hope everyone is still enjoying it. Hats off and many kudos to fellow author Rachel for all her help with this. Much appreciated.

I have a small confession to make. I was in Tampa this weekend for a job interview and got stranded. I'm not one to mention names (Delta) of companies that screw me (Delta), particularly in a forum like this where someone might work for (Delta) said company. Let's just say that someone (Delta) pretty much guaranteed a lack of business from myself and several other (victim's) passengers. If I have offended anyone who works for (Delta) such a company, you have my apologies (piss off).

Anyway, in the course of my frustrations last night, I kinda wiped out a slew of my e-mail. I read it all, but only replied to one or two before my little 'accident'. SO, if you've e-mailed me about the story, I thank you. If you're actually interested in a reply, please feel free to write again. Otherwise, just feel glad that you didn't get anything to clutter your mail. I promise that no one (Delta) will cause me to make such a silly mistake again.

For those of you who have been paying attention to the story, and I assume that if you're here than you ALL have, then you probably notice the staggering coincidence of me going to Tampa for an interview. Yes, that part of Dylan's life is something I'm trying to make come true. So, if you live in Tampa, and know anyone who could use a highly skilled programmer in their company, feel free to write ;-)

Author's note: -------------- It was pointed out to me that the fact that Dylan only spent a week in the hospital after his initial accident might be, well, wrong. Yeah, this is true. Unfortunately, I have no idea how bad different injuries are, or how long they take to heal. I'm an Electrical Engineer, fer cryin' out loud ;-). I haven't been keeping up with my 'ER' in years. So, I was wingin' it

Also, you'll notice that actual plot, not just background info, is starting to develop. So, I hope that y'all continue to enjoy it. If you don't, see my apologies in paragraph 2 above. As I've mentioned before, the story is well past where it is here. So, if you have complaints, I'm afraid you're probably at least a week late gettin' `em to me. See paragraph 2 for reasons why I got 50 pages written in the last 36 hours. Airports are NOT exactly major hubs (excuse the pun) of social activity.

Finally, I'm using 'author's god-like power' to manipulate the BSB tour dates. While the Boys will, in fact, be in New Orleans around the times mentioned, and the date for the Grammies is correct in my story (or in my head, anyway, if it's not specified in the story), I fudged the dates by a day on the stop in Houston. Also, I've never actually been to Houston or New Orleans, so apologies to any natives who happen to notice oddities or vagueness about my descriptions there.

Usual stuff (i.e feel free to skip to 'Chapter 14') Favorite stories: 'Escape', 'Choices', 'Separate Lives',

'Brian and Me' (are we EVER gonna see the next chapter here? ;-),

'Kevin and Justin', 'Lance in Shining Armour', and many others.

Frankly, I have too much time on my hands.

Disclaimer ----------

This story is completely in the mind of the author and is not intended to reflect the actual personalities or sexualities of the Backstreet Boys (no matter how much the author might wish it otherwise!). If any member of BSB is gay, it's their life and their business (but they can feel free to e-mail me and complain about the story). Don't read this story if you're too young in your corner of the world. Don't read this story if it's illegal in your corner of the world. No hamsters were harmed during the filming of this movie, etc. etc. etc.

And now, after ALL THAT INTRO STUFF.

Chapter 14

The next ten days were the longest I'd ever been through. I had thought I'd experienced pain when Gram died. I was so wrong. I had never felt anything that hurt as bad as Ke...as his walking out did.

I don't actually remember much about that time. I just went through the motions of life. Got up in the morning, ate my yogurt breakfast, went to work, came home, sat on the deck staring at the universe above, went to bed, and started the whole thing over the next day.

Lindsay was amazing through this time. She practically moved in with me. When I was at home, she was there to watch over me. She'd even rearranged her shifts at the hospital so she could be with me as much as possible. When I was actually able to think clearly, I wondered to myself how I'd managed to pick up a friend like her. That inevitably led to wondering how I'd managed to be so wrong about him, and things just crashed from there.

To my surprise, Nick had called me a few days after they left. We talked a bit. I apologized to him for how I'd acted. He told me it was no big deal, that he understood. Apparently, he was also ok with the fact that I was gay. We managed to hold a few minute conversation before Kevin came up. That was just too much for me to deal with, so I hung up.

Work was my only real outlet. I'd buried myself in it. I'd go in at 5:00am. I wasn't sleeping much, anyway, so it wasn't a real problem getting up. I'd work through my lunch, only stopping long enough to put myself through a workout at the gym we had in our building. Once I'd tortured my body enough, I'd go back to my desk until at least 8:00pm. I was even working weekends. I figured my boss would be happy I was doing so much. I was wrong on that one.

"Dylan, can I see you in my office, please," her voice came through the intercom on my desk.

"Sure, Anna, I'll be right in," I replied.

I took off my headphones and laid them down on my desk. I had tossed out my Backstreet Boys CD's. Big surprise there, I'm sure. But, Celine Dion had plenty of good depression tunes out there. I listened to a LOT of Celine those ten days.

I wandered across the hall and into Anna's office. Most of us worked in cubicles, but the management and senior staff types got offices. With windows, the lucky bastards. But, sunshine wasn't something I wanted much of these days, anyway, so it didn't really phase me.

"Sit down, Dylan," she said. I could tell by the tone in her voice that something was wrong. "Dylan, I'm gonna get straight to the point. What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?" I decided to play dumb. Brilliant strategy, I know. Napoleon I was not, and she proved it with her next statement.

"You know exactly what I mean, Dylan," she said sternly. That one backfired, I guess. "You've been working 12 and 15 hour days, only stopping to go to the gym, then coming back. It's not healthy, and you're gonna burn yourself out."

"Has my work been bad?" I asked, wondering why she'd even noticed my sudden workaholic tendencies.

"No. In fact, it's been outstanding," she replied. She paused for a moment before continuing in a softer tone. "Dylan, you haven't been here all that long, so I'm going to explain something to you. I may be a manager, but I do also care about the well being of the people on my team. You may be performing outstanding work right now, but I know this isn't going to last. You're going to burn yourself out, and then not only will be useless to me as an employee, but you'll also be useless to yourself as a person."

I just sat there, not sure what to say or how to proceed. I was reluctant to tell her that a personal problem had been the cause of my recent behavior. Most of my past managers would have frowned on letting personal issues interfere with work in any way.

"So, I'm going to ask you again. What's going on with you?"

"It's..." I paused, clearing my throat, "it's a personal thing, Anna. I know I shouldn't let personal matters interfere with my work life, but..." I trailed off again.

Anna didn't say anything. She just sat and waited for me to continue. I tried again.

"I know I shouldn't let personal matters interfere with my job, but this was something pretty hard to deal with, and working extra hours is the only way, " I paused again, " the only way to get him out of my mind." I immediately realized what I'd said and quickly looked up at her.

"It's ok, Dylan, I already knew, and I don't really care. As you said, personal matters shouldn't have anything to do with your job, and you've performed great here in the time you've been here. The last few weeks, you've worked like two people," she said with a smile.

I smiled back a little, glad that she was taking this so well. Unfortunately, I didn't anticipate her next response.

"So, since you've been working so hard, I'm going to give you the rest of this week off. I know two and a half days isn't much, but I want you to take it."

"But, Anna," I tried to protest. Including the weekend, that was nearly five days with no work to distract me. How would I do it?

"Dylan," her tone softened again, "you need to take a break. You're using work to hide from your problems, and it's eventually going to come back to haunt BOTH of us. I want you to take the weekend and relax. Deal with your problems. And I don't want you back in this office before 8:00am on Monday morning. Is that clear?"

"Yeah, Anna," I replied. I stood to leave, "I guess I'll see you Monday, then." I stood up and walked to the door when she stopped me.

"Dylan," she said. I turned to look at her. "I know what you're going through, and I can tell you that it will get better. I know it means nothing now, but you'll eventually come through this."

I stared at her a moment longer before giving a brief nod and walking out the door.

I called Lindsay from my cell phone and let her know what'd happened. She didn't say anything, but I know she was glad that Anna'd made me go home. She'd been quietly pestering me about my long hours, also. For all I know, and I wouldn't put anything past Lindsay, she's the one who called Anna and complained.

I stumbled into my apartment and went up to my room. I stripped out of my work clothes, suddenly wanting the feel of a hot shower on my skin.

I turned on the water in the shower. While I let it warm up, I took a moment to look at myself in the mirror. A really long, hard look.

I looked like shit, frankly. My hair was straggly, obviously in need of a cut since I hadn't had one in weeks. There were deep pits under my eyes. I looked like I'd met Mike Tyson in a dark alley.

All the gym time and the lack of decent eating had left me thin. Too thin, actually. My cheeks were sunken in, and I could see my ribs pretty easily through my skin. I had never been really buff and beefy, but I had never been this skinny, either. Frankly, I looked sick.

I turned away with a sigh, too tired to care. The shower had warmed up enough by then, so I climbed in and just stood there. I didn't shampoo or grab the soap. I just let the heat of the shower seep into me.

I didn't realize how long I'd stood there until the heat of the shower wasn't so hot anymore. I must've been standing there more than half an hour. I shut off the water before the hot ran out on me completely.

I climbed back out of the shower and toweled myself off. I was beginning to realize how tired I really was right then. The shower had helped to relax me a lot.

I walked back into my bedroom, leaving the towel hanging on the rack to dry. I peeled back the covers and slid in between the cool sheets. I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

I was, very rudely I thought, awakened to a loud knocking at my front door. It took me a minute to wake up and even realize what it was. Whoever it was must've been impatient, cause they knocked again before I'd even crawled out of bed.

"Just a minute," I hollered over the half wall that overlooked the living room.

`God, gimme a second, would ya?' I thought to myself as I scrounged for a pair of boxers. I finally found some and pulled them on, grabbing a t-shirt as I headed for the stairs.

I reached the front door, released the deadbolt, and yanked it open. After seeing who it was, it occurred to me I really needed to start using the peephole.

"Nick?!?!"

Chapter 15

"What are you doing here, Nick? Aren't you supposed to be shakin' ass on a stage somewhere else?" I asked. He didn't bother to answer, just pushed past me. "Please, come in," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Get dressed, Dylan," he said, his stern tone letting me know he wasn't taking any arguments.

"Excuse me?" Who did this guy think he was?

"You heard me. Go get dressed. You and I are going out," he said, again letting me know he meant business.

I stared into his blue eyes for a minute, trying to decide if it was worth telling him just exactly where he could go. Judging by the look on his face, he would probably tie me up and drag me out if he had to. As kinky as that might be, I decided against it. I was more partial to brunettes.

I didn't bother to say anything to him, just turned and went upstairs. I wasn't sure where we were going, but I didn't really feel like asking. I hated taking orders, and I was really resenting him barging in on me like that.

But there was a little part, deep inside, that was glad he had come. I hadn't really made any friends in Tampa besides Lindsay. It would be nice to hang with a guy again, especially one who already knew about me so I could just be myself.

I grabbed a pair of baggy carpenter jeans and a black t-shirt. I quickly dressed, then wet my head down in the bathroom to try to do something with my hair. I really needed that haircut. I managed to make myself look semi-respectable, so I grabbed my Birks (i.e. Birkenstock sandals) and headed back downstairs.

Nick was standing there, staring at his watch. Rolex, nice watch. Guess being world famous did have its perks.

"Come on, we're gonna be late," he said, the impatience in his voice noticeable.

"Well, excuse me, genius, but you were the one who picked the time, remember?!?!?" I said with a healthy dose of `smartass' thrown in. He cracked a smile at that, realizing that I would be ok with his heavy-handed approach to getting me out.

We walked outside into the warm Florida evening. I locked the door and followed Nick down to the parking lot. I couldn't hold in a gasp when I got there.

"A limo?!?! Nick, where the hell are we going?" His eyes had a devilish gleam I wasn't sure I really liked.

"You'll see. It's a surprise," was all he said.

We climbed in and the driver pulled away. Apparently, he already knew where we were going as Nick didn't say anything beyond "Ok, Tom, let's go."

I didn't look at Nick or say anything. I just contented myself with looking around. After all, this was my first, and possibly last, limo ride, so I should probably enjoy it.

I was like a little kid, pushing buttons and opening doors. I finally found the control for the sunroof and opened it wide. No point in having a sunroof if you don't use it, right?

Nick seemed content not to have to talk. Actually, I think he was glad I was preoccupied since he wouldn't have to explain where we were going. As it was, I discovered soon enough anyway.

"Tropicana Field, Nick?" I asked. He just looked away, no longer as confident as he'd been before.

Why Tropicana Field? They don't have any games tonight,' I thought. A concert maybe?' If I'd had my brain with me that day, I would've long since guessed his intentions. Then it finally hit me. There WAS a concert tonight. And Nick was one of the five guys in it.

"Nick, NO. Not just no, FUCK no!!"

He didn't say anything, just stared back at me. We battled without saying a word. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he was gonna be stubborn. Could he possibly out-stubborn me? Not a chance in hell. But, did I want him to try?

I turned away as the limo pulled to a stop. Neither of us made any move to get out, although I could hear the screaming girls outside. We must've been at the Boys' entrance, cause the screaming was intense. Nick leaned up and closed the sunroof.

"Nick, I," he stopped me.

"Dylan, I know what happened, alright? I know this is hard for you. But Lindsay and I both thought it'd be good for you to do this."

Et tu, Lindsay?' I thought, mimicking a line I'd heard from Shakespeare once. I think it was Julius Caesar'. Or Robin Williams in `Aladdin'. Ugh. Another Kevin reference I didn't need. I gave in to my fate.

"Alright, Nicky," I said, using a nickname I'd heard he didn't care for. The rumor must've been true, cause he frowned when I said it. Good. "I'll go." He started to open the door when I grabbed his arm. "On ONE condition."

I think he knew by the tone of my voice that, no matter how stubborn he was, I wouldn't bend on this one. He nodded his head.

"I will go on the condition that I don't have to have contact with Kevin. So, no backstage wandering, no `meet-n-greet' or whatever the hell you call it. I go to my seat, I watch you perform, and then you take me home. Got it?" He seemed to think a minute before he nodded. Somehow, I wasn't comforted much because that devilish look was back in his eyes.

He quickly climbed out of the limo. I think he was glad to escape before I changed my mind. In a way, I think I was glad, too. It was time to get on with my life, and facing this was a way to start. Of course, so was having my fingernails torn out with tweezers, but apparently my `friends' had decided that wasn't painful enough.

The screams were out of control when Nick stepped out. I could see him waving at the crowd, 99% of which were females under the legal voting age. I took a deep breath and stepped out as well. No one knew me, but I waved anyway. When in Rome, right?

We managed to make it through the crowd and into the building. Conscious of our agreement, Nick didn't take me to his dressing room. He grabbed a passing member of the staff that was there and handed him a ticket and what appeared to be a pass of some sort, apparently asking if he would mind escorting me to my seat. I couldn't really hear from the noise around us.

I think the man was going to protest for a minute until Nick's identity dawned on him. Then, he quickly spoke into the headset he was wearing and started pushing Nick down a side corridor. I guessed from the guy's behavior that little Nicky's field trip wasn't planned. Nor, judging from the frantic look on the staff guy's face, did it appear that Nick had bothered to inform anyone else.

That was actually a relief to me. If he hadn't told anyone he was going, then it was pretty likely that no one knew I would be here.

The guy came back once he got Nick started down the hall. I looked down after Nick and saw him waving at me. I waved back before I turned and followed the other man down the corridor and out to my seat.

It was a good seat. If you considered front row a good seat, of course. I was in a little section of my own, cordoned off from the other fans. I'd seen a similar setup in Denver when I went to that concert. I guessed it was a VIP section of some kind. I'm sure I felt really special, especially since I was the only one in this section.

The opening act was already on. I had no idea who they were, but they were a decent looking group of guys with good voices, so I sat back and enjoyed. They didn't do anything I recognized, but it was still fun.

I looked around at the stage setup. It was the same five sided one that I'd seen in Denver. It looked like I was going to see a similar show. I looked around for the scaffolding and harnesses that they'd used to ride in on their `sky-boards', but I didn't see them. Maybe they were on the other side.

The opening act finished, and the stagehands started work changing everything around. It didn't take as long as the last time, so the Boys were ready to come out within 20 minutes. The lights went back down, and the screams went back up. I thought I was gonna rupture an eardrum.

Smoke and fireworks began to shoot up from the stage. I realized then that they weren't going to be `flying' in this time, but coming up from underneath through the center of the stage.

From my seat, it was a little hard to see the middle of the stage. I was pretty close, and the stage was pretty tall. But, a few minutes later, there he was.

Kevin looked as good as he'd looked the last time I saw him. Hell, he looked better. I guess it was good one of us did.

The middle of the stage came rising up, Kevin on the center platform with each of the guys on a ramp around him. Kevin was facing my side of the stage, although he didn't look my way. Nick was on the ramp near me, also, and he smiled at me and gave me a thumbs-up.

I smiled back and began to plot how to ensure that Nick never had children. I thought for a second and added Lindsay to the list.

The show really began then, with the guys lighting into `Larger than Life'. It had never really been a favorite, but it was one of their better high-energy numbers, so it was a great way to get started.

Everyone around me was standing and yelling. I started to stand, too, until I realized a few things. I was right in the center of my side of the stage, and there was no one right next to me because of the security staff holding them back. And I wasn't on Nick's side of the stage. I was on Kevin's.

Forget children. I was gonna make sure Nick never even had sex again. Needless to say, I stayed in my seat, hoping Kevin wouldn't see me.

I managed to get lucky, at least for a few songs. He was playing to the rest of the audience, looking above me to the people on the upper levels. Then, they started `Show Me The Meaning'.

They each sat on a stool, one per side of the stage. Kevin was right in front of me, Nick had the side just off to my right. I could see him looking at me as they started. Brian was off to my left, and AJ and Howie were on the sides across from me that I couldn't see.

He was so close, I could practically touch him. I think I'd forgotten how beautiful he was. Or at least I'd tried to forget. The Boys began to sing, and I lost myself looking at him.

Kevin's solo came up, and I couldn't stop a tear from sliding down when I heard his voice again. It seemed so long. Then again, it hurt so much, it felt like it was yesterday. Our eyes met.

Kevin faltered when he realized who I was. Luckily, Nick had already started harmonizing with him, so he was able to cover Kevin pretty fast. I stared into those eyes I loved so much. Kevin seemed to shake himself and start singing again, tearing his eyes away from me and looking back over the audience.

They finished the song. It had been one of my favorites from `Millenium' so I really loved hearing it. But, I couldn't stay there and watch him anymore. After it finished, I looked up and saw him staring at me again. I had to get out of there.

I quickly stood and made my way past security, back out the way I came. A few looked like they wanted to challenge my presence there, but apparently the pass I was wearing persuaded them to piss off. I managed to find the door where Nick and I had entered.

I opened it, and the screams were insane. I realized that these girls must not've been able to get tickets and were waiting for some glimpse of the BSB when they left. Apparently they were too high on life to realize that it wasn't likely any of the guys would be coming out this early.

I looked out and saw the guy who'd driven Nick and I. Tom, I think Nick had said. Apparently, he recognized me, as he ushered me to follow him and led me to one of the limo's that were waiting there. He held the door for me as I quickly crawled in.

The next two hours passed quietly. Well, except for the screamin' teen chippies outside the door. I knew the concert must've ended about half an hour before cause I started to hear horns honking and people yelling. They'd either had a good time and were making some noise to show it or they were cussin' out the guy in front of them for cutting them off.

I stared off through the parking lot, not really paying much attention to the arena on the other side of the car. The number of the cars in the lot steadily dwindled until there were only a few left. I was basically alone, except for the raging fans on the other side, still waiting to see their idols. I heard the screams go up a few notches, so I knew Nick must be heading out.

`Finally,' I thought with a sigh.

I heard the door open, but I didn't bother to look over. I was ready to go home. Nick and Lindsay's plan may've seemed pretty good, but it didn't really carry off that well.

"Nick, take me home," I said, closing my eyes and leaning against the window.

"It's not Nick, Dylan," a familiar voice said beside me.

Chapter 16

My head snapped around when I heard Kevin's voice. I didn't even hesitate.

"Fuck you, Kevin," I said in a voice that could've started an ice age. I quickly opened the other door and took off out the other side.

"Dylan, wait!" I heard him shout. I didn't care. I had to get away.

I took off across the parking lot. I knew he wouldn't follow me. There were too many fans still lingering around. I was right.

I made it across the street and into a park. I slowed down, eventually stopping in a little clearing. I looked up at the stars again. This time, instead of offering comfort, it was almost like they mocked me. They knew I was hurt, but it didn't matter to them. They just kept burning away.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. Obviously he'd decided to follow me in the limo, as I knew it was him before I even heard him speak.

"Dylan, I," he started. He didn't get a chance to finish because my fist was in his face. Then another. He fell after I decked him the second time. I think I was more shocked than he was. Besides my one fight with Dad, I'd never hit anyone like that before. I didn't really have time to think about it, as I was tackled from behind.

"Aaargh!" I cried out in pain. Although my injuries had healed, the ribs that had been broken were still pretty tender. The doc would probably not consider being tackled by a 250# security guard a good thing. At that point, neither did I. I never knew there were so many stars on the ground.

"No, dammit, get off of him!" I could hear Kevin yelling at someone. His voice seemed a long ways away. I was starting to fade out.

`I guess those ribs were worse than I thought,' was my last thought before I passed out.

When I came to, I could feel someone stroking my hair. My head was resting in someone's lap. I realized from the sticks poking me in the ass that I was probably still in the park. I could hear voices a short distance away, but I couldn't really make out what they were saying. One sounded a little like Nick, and he didn't sound happy. I opened my eyes and I saw the moon above. I turned to the side, and I saw heaven.

"Kevin?" I was still dazed. Somewhere in my mind, it occurred to me that I was still furious with him, that he'd practically killed me when he walked out. But, at that moment, he felt too good for me to care.

"Yeah, Dylan, just relax. I'm here," he said in that soft, country voice. I just closed my eyes and stayed there. If this was a dream, I had no intention of waking up soon. Nick didn't play along, however.

"Dammit, Brian, just leave it alone, would ya?" I heard him yell. I could hear his shoes scraping the ground as he moved over to us. I sighed and opened my eyes.

"Hey, man, how're you doin'?" he asked quietly. For whatever reason, Nick's voice established my grasp on reality. I pulled away from Kevin and pushed myself into a sitting position.

"I'm fine, Nick. I think you should take me home now." I couldn't look at Kevin, but I knew that Nick was looking over my shoulder at him.

"Yeah, sure, Dylan. Come on," he said in a sad voice. He offered me his hand, which I took as he started to pull me up. A sharp pain in my side had me seeing stars again, and I stumbled back as I tried to stand. A pair of strong arms caught me before I could fall.

"Dylan, we're taking you to a hospital. Now," Kevin said, his tone letting me know he wasn't taking arguments. At least I knew where Nick got it from. I just nodded and let him hold me up.

"Kevin," I heard Brian start to say something, but Nick cut him off.

"Give it a rest, Bri, we'll deal with it later. Dylan needs to get his ribs checked out," Nick said in a tired voice. Whatever `it' was, I could tell that Nick was already tired of dealing with it.

I let Kevin and Nick lead me over to a waiting limo. I realized there were two of them there. AJ and Howie moved over to the second one. Brian started to move towards the one with Nick, but Nick held up a hand and indicated he should go with AJ and Howie. He looked like he was going to protest, but he must have decided not to worry about it anymore.

I carefully crawled into the limo and moved over to the side. I could feel Kevin move in beside me, and Nick took a seat across from me. I closed my eyes and rested my head against the window.

Kevin placed a hand on my shoulder. I tensed instantly, but he didn't pull away. A moment later, I felt his other hand as he pulled me away from the window and brought me into his arms. I tried to resist, but I really didn't want to. It felt too good.

"Kevin," I started.

"Shhh, don't say anything, Dylan. We'll talk about it later, ok? Please?"

I didn't want to wait. I wanted to scream and holler and hit him and make him hurt like he'd made me hurt. But I was too much of a coward. I liked the feel of his arms too much, and I couldn't stand to pull myself away. I wanted to stay there for as long as he would hold me.

Nick called Lindsay on the way to the hospital. When we pulled up, I could see her waiting outside. I felt a little guilty. This was her night off and she was here again anyway.

Nick climbed out of the limo and turned to help me. Kevin followed. Apparently, Nick hadn't mentioned that he had modified their little plan to include getting Kevin along because I heard Lindsay gasp. She recovered quickly, however, because the next thing I heard was the sound of her palm connecting with his face.

Kevin's face was taking quite a pounding tonight. If we weren't careful, we were gonna get sued by his management for damaging the goods. Luckily for Lindsay, Tom wasn't quite as fast to overreact as the other security man had been with me. Or maybe it was lucky for him.

We all just stood there for a minute, Nick in shock, Kevin looking like a puppy someone had just planted a solid kick on, and Lindsay, looking like her hand needed some more exercise on his face. I decided it was getting out of hand.

"Hello? Man in pain over here."

My voice apparently snapped everyone into action because they all decided to move towards me. Surprisingly, Kevin reached me first. Even more surprising? I didn't even flinch when he put his arm around me to help me in the door.

I had to wait for an hour to see a doctor. Apparently, I wasn't in quite enough pain to warrant faster care. When I finally did see one, he told me that I'd just cracked my ribs a little bit. It wasn't really serious, but he wanted me to take it easy for a while.

"And NO strenuous physical activity!" For some reason, his statement made me blush. I thought my cheeks were going to explode.

What is it with me?' I smiled to myself, Kevin comes back into my life and suddenly I'm a blushing fool again.' Thoughts of Kevin made the smile fade.

Was he back in my life? What was going on with him? Two weeks before, he'd gone scampering away with his tail between his legs. Tonight, he was acting like I was pregnant with his first-born child. Biologically not-gonna-happen, I know, but it was how he was acting.

I finished my business with the doc and made my way back out to the waiting room. Nick, Lindsay, and Kevin all stood and walked over to me. Lindsay gently hugged me, and I explained what had happened, although I omitted the doctor's comment about `strenuous physical activity' for the sake of my blushed-out cheeks.

"And now, I'd really like to go home," I said. For some reason, I ended up looking at Kevin at that moment. I really wanted to add how I wanted him to come home with me, but I held off. I didn't really know how to proceed with him.

"We'll have to take a cab," Lindsay broke in on my thoughts.

"What? Why?" I asked.

"My car's in the shop until tomorrow. I had to get some work done, and, since I wasn't supposed to be working tonight," she gave me `the eye'. I grinned sheepishly, and she continued, "I let them keep it."

"Well, we can take you," Kevin's soft voice interrupted us. I was so torn.

"Don't you guys have to be getting back on the road?" I said, so quiet I'm surprised anyone heard me.

"Forget that, Dylan. We'll be glad to take you," Nick jumped in before anyone else spoke. I hesitated another moment, looking over at Lindsay. She looked over at Kevin, apparently trying to decide if this was a good idea, then turned back and gave me a small nod.

We dropped her off first, as she lived closer to the hospital. I told her I'd call her in the morning and let her know if I was doing ok. She gave me a kiss on the cheek, then thanked Nick for tonight. She turned to Kevin, staring at him as he stared back. Finally, without saying anything to him, she got out of the limo and went up the walk.

We rode the rest of the way to my place in silence. So much had happened that night, I could barely believe it had been less than 12 hours before that Nick had `kidnapped' me. When we reached my apartment, I didn't say anything, just reached for the door.

"Dylan, wait," Kevin's voice stopped me. I turned to look at him for a moment. He looked back, apparently coming to some kind of a decision. He turned to Nick, "Take the limo and head back. Tell everyone to do their thing, and I'll catch up with y'all later." He turned back to me.

"Kevin," Nick said slowly. Apparently, he wasn't really excited about Kevin's plan. Kevin glanced over at him.

"Nick, I need to talk to Dylan. Just tell the guys I'll call tomorrow and sort things out. Ok?"

I could sense Nick's reluctance as he nodded. Hell, I shared it. But, Kevin was right. I couldn't live with this confusion anymore. We needed to talk.

I climbed out of the limo, Kevin following behind me. We both watched as Nick headed off to, well, wherever he was going. Kevin followed me up the stairs to my apartment.

I opened the door and let him in, neither of us speaking. I really had no clue what to say at that moment. I was so torn between hating him for doing what he'd done and loving him for being who he was to me. I slipped off my sandals and padded over to the deck. I felt more than heard him come up behind me.

He put a hand on my shoulder and gently turned me around. I stared into those eyes of his for a moment. He began to lean towards me. I couldn't help myself as I leaned into him, too. Our lips touched.

I think the universe came to a screeching halt at that moment. I guess I was wrong when I said nothing we could do could ever affect that great machine. Kevin's lips had the power to stop it.

He pulled away from me and sighed. I kept my eyes closed, not sure I wanted to open them. Afraid the dream would end if I did.

"I've wanted to do that almost since the moment I met you," he said. Our bodies were still pressed together. I could feel the warmth of his skin, the whisper of his breath on my face when he spoke. I slowly opened my eyes, at last realizing that, for now, this wasn't a dream.

"Kevin," I began, but his finger on my lips stopped me. He was interrupting me an awful lot tonight.

"No, Dylan. Let me explain, please?" I looked in his eyes and saw something. Pleading? Desperation? I nodded and let him continue.

"I've been with both men and women in my life." This wasn't really a surprise to me, given his current career and his former high school jock status. "My last male lover was a few years ago, right before we really started to take off in the US. The guys knew about him and were, for the most part, ok with it. There were...a few problems, though." He paused.

"Brian." I stated. He glanced up and looked me in the eye, nodding.

"Yeah, Brian. He's a good man, really he is, Dylan. But, he's also a very religious man. I made my peace with God and my beliefs a long time ago, but his beliefs make it difficult for him to accept any kind of gay relationship. To his credit, though, he did work at it. After all, we're family." I nodded, letting him know I understood.

"When our fame took off, Glen started to get more jealous of my time away. He hated that we couldn't be together as much, and when we were together, we couldn't show it in public. He also hated the fact that I had to date women to maintain the image. He wasn't the only one," he said, his tone indicating the distaste he felt for having to date people just for appearances.

"Eventually, things got so bad that we broke it off. Somewhere along the way, we had both changed. We weren't the same people. Especially Glen. He'd decided that, while he couldn't live with my fame, he wanted to live with my money. He started blackmailing us. One of the reasons that we started to pay more attention to finances a few years ago was that we had to come up with cash to pay him off. It was what eventually led to our split from Lou." He looked at me then, apparently wondering if I knew about that. I just nodded, letting him know to go on.

"Shortly after we switched over to the Firm, Glen was killed in a diving accident in Mexico. But the damage had been done. The guys were pissed at me. After all, Glen was my lover. It was my fault, right? The world doesn't know it, but we nearly broke up then." He paused, obviously reliving some painful memories. He cleared his throat self-consciously and went on. "Amazingly enough, it was Nick that kept it all together. I guess he realized that we needed to keep going, that no matter what was said, we wanted to keep going."

"He held us all together long enough for the other guys to calm down. We made our peace with each other, but it was touch and go for a while. Now, we're probably closer than we ever were before. But we were also a lot more wise in the ways of the world, and gun-shy about letting anyone else in."

"I've been alone since that happened. I've dated a few women, but I've kept everything low-key. I refused to get involved with anyone that could end up putting the guys, and me, through all of that again."

I stood there, letting it sink in. I wasn't sure if it really helped me feel any better to know this.

"But, Kevin, why did you react that way to me? Why did you bail on me? You could've just let me believe you were straight. You didn't have to abandon me. I could've handled just being your friend." There were tears in my eyes now. I tried to turn away to hide them, but he wouldn't let me.

"Dylan, I couldn't handle that. I couldn't lie to you like that. I knew that I was falling for you. Brian had picked up on it the night before. I got my ass chewed all the way back to Orlando after dinner that night. He wasn't happy that I was interested in a man again, for one thing. `It's against God's teachings' and all that."

He paused. Somehow, I knew what was coming next. I hoped he wouldn't say it, but he did anyway.

"He was also afraid you might turn out like Glen. And...," there was a long pause, "so was I." He at least had the decency to look away in shame. "Dylan, we're far more popular and far more visible than we were two years ago. If you decided to do what Glen did, you could destroy all our lives."

This time I did turn away. I was angry. No, I was furious.

"You actually believe that I could do that to you? To Nick? To the other guys?" I was amazed he had the balls to tell me that. "Even if I hated you, Kevin, I would never do that to you. Hell, I have hated you these past two weeks, but I would still have never outted you," I was nearly screaming now. There was silence for a moment before he spoke again, softly.

"You hated me?"

I turned back to him, seeing the pain reflected in his eyes. A part of me was exultant that I had managed to strike back at him. The rest of me was so sickened at how I had hurt him that I wanted to jump off the deck and put us both out of our misery. I sighed.

"No, Kevin. Whatever I said, I didn't hate you. As much as I wanted to, my heart wouldn't let me. And tonight...," my voice gave out. I cleared my throat, trying desperately to finish, "tonight, you're back, full of apologies and explanations about why you left. But no explanations about why you came back."

"Dylan, I was so scared that night. I wanted to tell you about myself, wanted to tell you how I felt. But what if I was wrong about you? What if you were just like Glen? He didn't start out blackmailing us, you know. He started out as our friend. He started out as my lover." I could hear the sadness in his voice, but I didn't know how to react anymore.

"But, after you...um...hung up on Nick that day, he came and," he paused, searching for the right words, "had a little talk with me. Or rather, he talked, and I listened." He paused for a second, a slightly bemused expression on his face. "I don't know when he grew up so much."

"He and I argued a lot the next week. Me telling him that I couldn't take the chance, no matter how much I cared for you. Him telling me that I was fulla crap and that I'd better take the chance or he'd kick my ass. I guess tonight, he just decided to take the choice away from me."

"If this whole get-together was Nick's idea, why was he so hesitant to let you come with me after we got back?" Kevin hesitated. I guessed he thought I wouldn't like what he was going to tell me.

"Well, probably because I was supposed to be on the bus with them tonight. We still have a few weeks of touring left, and he knew Brian, and probably the other guys, would be pretty ticked if I didn't show."

"Oh," was pretty much all I could think to say.

I turned away once again, gazing out into the now-cool Florida evening. I stood there, thinking about everything he had dropped in my lap that night. I could feel him next to me. I knew he was hurt at what he'd done. I just didn't know if it was enough for me to trust him again.

I turned and looked into his eyes. I could see tears shining there, but he was too strong to let them go.

Yes,' I decided. It is enough to trust him.'

I looked back over the deck, at the stars I loved so much. Almost as much as I loved him. Apparently, though, my turning away gave him the wrong message.

"I guess it'd be best if I go," he said. I pulled away from the deck and looked at him again. This time, the tears were falling down. He wasn't looking at me, though.

"Oh, no ya don't. You're not walking away from me again," I said, the emotion in my voice pretty noticeable. He glanced up and met my eyes as I walked over and took him in my arms. Our lips met, and the universe once again ground to a standstill.

Chapter 17

I awoke to a piece of ass in my face. I'm as fond of a good butt as the next guy, but not when it's covered in black and white fur and attached to a tail that is currently flicking against my ear.

"Dammit, Pandora, get outta my face! You know I hate it when you do that!" I shoved her down off the bed. Yeah, I do talk to my cats. I'm usually ok until they start talking back. Have you ever noticed that cats are the only animals in the animal kingdom with the ability to communicate with a look that you are now on their shit list and they will take revenge on you?

Pandora padded slowly out of my room, tail in the air. It was embarrassing to be belittled by a cat, but Pandy was well versed in cat etiquette. She had been an inheritance of sorts when Gram died. No one else in the family could take her, and I really didn't mind. It was another reminder for me of the woman I missed a lot.

I slowly stretched in bed, then realized something weird was going on. I was still in boxers. I never sleep in boxers. Actually, I never sleep in anything at all. Then, memories of last night filtered into my sleep-fogged brain. Kevin.

The bed was empty of anyone but me. Had I dreamed the whole thing? My heart started to race. I wasn't sure I could deal with it if it had all happened only in my head. I looked around the room.

A sigh of relief escaped my lips. Kevin's shirt was hanging on the chair in the corner. Last night really happened, he was really here. I let myself drift over the last 24 hours, smiling.

Kevin and I had stayed up pretty late last night, talking through all of our issues from the past weeks. There was some more fighting here and there, but we mostly just talked until things were resolved. I must've fallen asleep, because the last thing I remembered was the two of us, laying on the couch and just enjoying the contact.

I threw the covers back and stood up, deciding it was time to find my wayward boyfriend. Boyfriend. That had a nice ring to it. I started to smile as I wandered downstairs. I heard a voice coming from the deck.

"Brian, I know what I'm doing," Kevin said into the phone. He'd apparently decided to `call and sort things out' as he'd promised Nick last night that he would.

"No, it's not like that. Dammit, Brian, he's not like that," he was trying hard not to yell. I gathered he hadn't noticed me, yet. He must've thought I was still asleep.

"Of course I remember Glen. How do you think I could forget something like that. I loved him before he did that to us, remember?" Ouch, that one hurt. Kevin chose that moment to notice I was there. "Dylan."

I nodded, trying to smile.

"Brian, I gotta go," he paused, presumably so Brian could get in another two cents of wisdom. "Yeah, I'll be in New Orleans in time for the show tomorrow," he sighed. "No, I'm not gonna come tonight. Just get over it, B, we'll talk more when I meet you tomorrow. Bye."

He hung up before Brian could say anything else. He placed the cordless on the counter as he moved over to me. He gently slid his arms around me and pulled me close. I leaned into him, laying my head down on his shoulder and wrapping my arms around his back.

"You ok, D?" he asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good, Kev," I replied softly, losing myself in his presence. His shirt was still up in my bedroom. Strangely enough, I'd forgotten to put one on, too, so I just held him, loving the feel of his skin against mine. I knew I could die a contented man at that moment.

"You looked a little upset is all," he said. I could hear the concern in his voice.

"I'm ok, really. It was just something stupid," I tried to explain without really giving away what I had been thinking. I turned my head on his shoulder and leaned into his neck as I lightly ran my hands up and down his strong back.

"Dylan, man, come on. Tell me what was bothering you. We need to be open, even about the little things, if we're gonna make this thing between us work," he said.

"It's just...," I trailed off. I took a breath and tried again, talking quickly to get it all out, "I just heard you say that about how you loved Glen is all. It was silly, I know, but I got a little jealous," I explained, blushing a little as I knew how foolish it was.

"It's natural to be jealous, Dylan, as long as you realize that I'm yours, now. If you're ever jealous or uncomfortable, tell me. One of the reasons that Glen and I failed was because he didn't tell me about his feelings until it was already too late."

I cringed a little at him mentioning Glen again. He must've felt me tense up, as he pulled his head back from me. He placed his hands on either side of my head, tilting my head to get me to look in his eyes.

"I don't want the same thing to happen to us, ok?" he asked. I stared at him for a brief second, then nodded back. He worked his hands to the back of my head and neck, stroking through the short hair there.

I sighed, enjoying the feel of his hands on me. I put my head back on his shoulder and just relaxed against him. I could feel his breath tickling my neck. I took a deep breath of my own, savoring his scent. Even his smell was beautiful. If he wasn't all mine, I'd probably be disgusted at how perfect he was.

We stood there together for several minutes before the outside world decided to intrude once again with a loud pounding on the door. It startled me, and I jerked back from him. I quickly ran to the door and checked the peephole. Lindsay. What was she doing here?

"Kev, it's Linds," I told him. "Do you want to hang out upstairs while I get rid of her or...," I let the thought die. I wanted him to stay. I knew I would have to hide my relationship with him from most of the world. I wanted him to allow me to share us with her.

But, I also knew how much it would affect his life if others knew about us. Not only his life, but the lives of the other guys. No matter what I wanted, I wouldn't put any pressure on him to risk his career or that of the other BSB.

He must've sensed what was going on in my head. He walked over to me, put his arm around my waist, and opened the door.

"Dylan, what the hell took...you...so...oh. Kevin," she said. The shock on her face was evident, but I could also hear a note of disapproval in her voice. I sighed. I knew this was going to be a pain.

"Hi, Lindsay," he said with a small smile. She didn't return it.

"Come on in, Lindsay," I invited. No sense in having this `discussion' on the front step. "What's up? I thought I was supposed to call you this morning."

"You were supposed to call me this morning. Which is why I'm here since it's after 12:00," she scolded me lightly.

I took a glance at the clock. 12:45. Ooops, guess I blew that one.

"Sorry, Linds. Kev and I were just up really late talking. I guess I overslept," I explained.

"Just talking?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Not that it's any of your business," I paused, giving her a look that stressed this, "but, yes, just talking. We had a lot to work out."

I turned and started walking into the living room, grabbing Kevin's hand as I went. I led us to the couch and pushed Kevin down in the corner of it. I sat down next to him, lying against his chest with his arm around me resting against my stomach. I lightly stroked the back of his hand as Lindsay sat down in the recliner across from us.

"And did you work it out?" she asked. She didn't seem to want to let this go. Kevin answered this time.

"Yeah, we did. And what we didn't work out, we know we can deal with as it comes," he said with a strength in his tone. "Lindsay, I know I hurt him, and I know," he started, but she interrupted.

"Kevin, you didn't `hurt' him," she began with barely disguised sarcasm, "You destroyed him. He's been a zombie the last two weeks, barely sleeping, barely eating. Working long hours, all day, every day, just so he wouldn't have to come home. Not to mention the hours in the gym. Look at him, Kevin. He's skin and bones. Literally! I don't ever wanna have to see him go through that again!"

I never realized how worried Lindsay was about me. Or how furious she was with Kevin. The anger in her tone had me speechless. It had my strong man in tears. I felt one drop onto my shoulder.

I tore my eyes away from Lindsay when I felt the tear. I sat up a little and looked at Kevin, at the tears streaking down his face.

"Dylan, I'm sorry, I never meant to do this to you, I never wanted," I could tell he was rambling, losing his control a little. I leaned into him, wrapping my arms around him and just holding him as tight as I could.

"It's ok, Kev. I'm alright. Yeah, you hurt me, but you came back to me. You made things right with me. Now that you're with me, I'm gonna be ok," I tried to reassure him. He just kept crying. There was only one thing left I could think to say, one thing I hadn't said yet. One thing I wasn't sure he was ready to hear. I placed my lips against his ear as he cried against my shoulder. "Kevin, I love you."

I felt him tense for a moment, then relax back against me. He took a deep breath, then another. He pulled back to look at my face.

I had a hard time meeting his eyes for a moment. I had just laid everything on the line. If he didn't return my feelings...

"Dylan, I love you, too," he said, so softly I doubted Lindsay could even hear it. I looked up into his eyes, those green eyes, shining in the light from the window.

"You do?" The relief in my voice must have been obvious to him cause he started to chuckle.

"Yeah, silly, I do. I love you," he said it louder this time, with more strength. He hugged me tighter and brought his lips to mine.

The kiss started lightly, just the touch of his lips on mine. It quickly deepened when I felt his mouth open slightly. His tongue traced across my lips. I opened them, allowing him to slide his tongue into my mouth, across my lips, locking with my own tongue.

I couldn't get enough of him. His taste. His touch. His smell. I was on `Kevin overload', and yet, I wanted even more. I started to pull myself into his lap when I heard a throat clearing behind me. Who was interrupting us? Oh, right, Lindsay was still here.

I slowly pulled back from Kevin, taking a moment to look in his eyes. Those eyes. Those piercing, expressive, deep, deep green pools of. Lindsay cleared her throat again. I finally tore myself away from Kevin to look at her.

"Yes?" I said, all innocent and full of naivete. "Can I do something for you?"

"Yeah, you can stop all that suckin' face and pay attention to your guest," she chided me.

"Linds, I WAS paying attention to my guest," I replied with a huge grin. She just rolled her eyes at me as I settled back against Kev again.

"Alright, I guess I can accept that you two put things back together, although I'm still not sure I'm too happy about it," she looked straight at me. I just put on a small smile and nodded slightly, acknowledging her concerns but showing that I didn't share them. "And you," she turned to Kevin.

"Yeah?" I could tell by the tone of his voice he was worried. He knew she meant a lot to me, and he didn't want to have her against him. I could almost feel him bracing for it. Frankly, I didn't blame him.

"If you ever hurt him like that again, I will hunt you down and ensure that your branch of the Richardson family ends with you. We clear on that?" Her tone was pretty stern, but I could tell she was having trouble holding back the laughter. It put me at ease. She was ok with us.

Kevin must have sensed her humor as well. He knew the underlying threat was real, but he also knew that she had accepted that the two of us were going to make a go of something. The tension I felt in him eased as he hugged me harder against him.

"Clear as crystal, ma'am," he said with a smile in his voice.

"Good. Now that that's out of the way, when do you have to go back on the road, Kevin?" I really needed to work on subtlety with her.

I tensed up at the mention of him leaving. In all our talking last night, we had avoided any mention of the tour. We both knew it was there, but we chose to ignore it. Lucky for us, Lindsay was there to bring reality crashing back in on us. I sighed.

"We're performing tomorrow night at the Superdome in New Orleans. I have to catch a flight out tomorrow morning," he said softly. I knew this bothered him as much as it did me.

"How long is the rest of the tour," Lindsay asked.

"Three weeks. Then we're home for a while, working on the next album. We might have to go away here and there to do some recording, but we should be basically in Orlando until September or October," he filled her in on the schedule.

I quickly tallied the time in my head. Six months at home, maybe more? I could've done a cheer on my living room floor if I knew any good ones. As it was I just turned to Kev.

"Only three weeks?" I asked.

"Only?" he asked back, his voice a bit sad. "It's gonna seem a whole lot longer than that without you there."

"I know, Kev, and for me, too. But your last tour was months long. I was expecting to have to pine away for you for at least three MONTHS," I said.

"Nope, not this time. `Millenium' was the biggest thing we've ever done. It took a lot of work, both for the guys in the group and for all the people helping us out. We decided that we'd take a little longer break this time."

I hugged him. I couldn't help it. I was so relieved that we'd be together again in such a short time. We'd be able to spend time together, get to know everything there is to know about each other.

He laughed at my enthusiasm. I was glad to see his sadness ease a bit. I wanted him to look forward to our time together, not dwell on our time apart.

I took a second to think about that. I was usually a lot more pessimistic than I was being now. Normally, I'm the one dwelling on the negatives instead of focusing on the positive. I guess he was having a good influence on me.

"So, you two are a couple, now?" Lindsay asked, reminding us we weren't alone. Damn. Tomorrow, she and I were going to start `Diplomacy in Conversation 101'.

I leaned back and looked into his face, silently asking the question with a lift of my eyebrow. He just gave a shy smile, letting me know my answer. I turned back to Lindsay.

"Yep, looks like it, I guess," I said, unable to contain the huge smile that appeared on my face.

"I'm happy for ya, Dylan, really happy," she said, returning my smile. "And for you, too, ya big softie," she added with a glance at Kevin.

We talked some more, filling Lindsay in on what had gone one the night before. She chuckled a little at Nick's strong-arm tactics. Apparently, he hadn't let her know the details of the plan to get me to the concert.

As I'd suspected by her reaction to Kev at the hospital last night, he'd also failed to mention that HIS goal was getting the two of us back together. Hers had just been to get me to face the loss and move on. I'd have to remember to thank Nick for his initiative.

"So, what's on tap for the two of you today?" Lindsay asked. Kevin spoke up before I could reply.

"Well, we kinda have to stay here today," he said. We did? I glanced up at him, asking the question with my eyes. "Well, see, there's this thing going on tonight that the guys are going to have to attend. It's pretty public, so a lot of people will notice I'm not there. That's why Brian was so mad that I wasn't coming back today. Word's gonna be put out that I'm sick," he paused for a sigh, "so, we can't go anywhere that I might be spotted."

I nodded my understanding, letting him know that it was all right. I really didn't mind that much. Spending the rest of the day alone with him was a great idea to me. Only one thing bothered me, though.

"What `thing' tonight?" I asked.

"Well, it's kinda," he paused. I knew I wasn't gonna like this. "It's the Grammy's." I almost fell off the couch.

"You're missing the Grammy's?! For me? Kevin, are you insane? You guys are up for like four awards. You're being recognized by others in the music biz. This is an important moment for you!" I was stunned, to say the least.

"Dylan," he spoke, his country drawl filling the silence, "nothing is more important to me than you are. Please understand that, ok? We'll get the award whether I'm there or not. This way, I can be here and share it with you."

I stared into his eyes for a moment, searching for the slightest sign of doubt or hesitation. When I didn't see any, I sighed and nodded. I was a little amazed at how much he was missing to stay with me. I turned back to Lindsay, continuing our earlier talk.

"Well, I'm off work until Monday, as you well know," I still wasn't convinced she hadn't called Anna, "so I'm pretty much into spending what time I can with my man right here," I said, squeezing the arm Kevin had wrapped around me and snuggling in closer to him.

"Why are you off through the weekend?" Kev asked. I hesitated to answer him. It seemed to bother him to be reminded of the events of the last few weeks, and what caused them.

"Well, my boss decided I was working too hard, so she, uh, decided that it, um, would be a good idea if I took the rest of the week off," I explained. To my surprise, he took it in stride.

"Good for her. You HAVE been working too hard," he said, running a hand across my side, and my very visible ribs, to emphasize the point. Lindsay's more helpful nature decided to jump in again. What was she, the Red Cross or something?

"I have a great idea," she said, that satanic gleam back in her eye. This woman had far too many `great ideas' in her head. And far too much fun playing them out on me. Although, I admitted to myself if not to her, her ideas thus far had proven pretty great for me. Eventually, anyway.

I lifted an eyebrow at her, letting her know to go on without actually saying anything to her.

"Kevin, what do you think about Dylan going with you for the weekend? He could fly out with you tomorrow, then fly back in on Sunday in time for work," she asked him, completely ignoring MY response.

"That'd be great!" he exclaimed. "We could hang out, check out the town, he could see the show. We're leaving for Houston right after the concert, so he'd have to fly back from there," he went on.

"That's no problem. He can just book his flight from there. Then you two would have that much less time apart over the next few weeks," she said, almost as excited as he was.

I really was enjoying how my best friend and my boyfriend were planning my `vacation' without even asking me. I let them continue for a moment before I decided to assert myself a little.

"Excuse me, third person in the room, please! Would you two mind not planning my life without including me on the planning? At least while I'm still in the room?" I said, letting the smartass in me out to play a little. Lindsay just waved her hand and ignored me.

"Can we get him on your flight tomorrow, though? It's pretty short notice," she continued to plan.

"I'm not sure, but I'll call management. They should be able to take care of it," he said. Hold it there.

"Alright, now here's where I draw the line," I said sternly. Both of them actually listened this time. "Kevin, you are not going to have your management pay for me to come visit you."

"Why not?" It apparently didn't occur to him that I wasn't really into the idea of mooching free rides from loved ones.

"Because, Kev, it's my trip, my vacation, and my boyfriend. If I'm going to come visit you, then I'm paying my own way. I don't want to be mooching off of you, or your management, just to get to see you. Ok?"

He seemed a little surprised at my decision. I knew there was a factor he wasn't really considering. One that I was reluctant to even bring up myself. I leaned in and whispered to him.

"Remember Glen," I said, and I could feel him stiffen. "What would the guys think if I came in, basically sponging off of you for this trip. Kev, I don't want anyone thinking I'm only in this for the money or your fame or whatever. I'm not going to give anyone," I stressed this, "the excuse to say that about me."

He knew what I meant there. Brian. We were already going to have enough problems explaining our relationship to Brian, possibly even AJ and Howie, too. Nick was, of course, in the bag already. We really didn't need the added problem of him paying for me to be there.

Besides, I wasn't about to start out our relationship taking handouts from him. If we were a long-established couple, and our income was, in fact, `our' income, then I might not feel like such a sponge. Well, yeah, I would, but I might at least consider doing it. For now, though, I wanted it to be on my terms. He nodded once he'd thought it over.

"Good," Lindsay said. "That's settled. Now, we'd better get him his plane ticket and decide what he's gonna take along," she said, once again talking over my head. I just shook my head at her, and she flashed me that winning smile.

We spent about an hour making all of my arrangements. We were going to fly out early on Friday morning to hook up with the guys in New Orleans. Kev insisted I go first class, even though I wasn't really up for the expense. He wouldn't let go on this, and used some of his frequent flyer miles to bump me up. I figured this was ok. Barely.

I had been going to get my own hotel room, but Kev persuaded me it would be ok to share his room as he usually had a spare bed if I wanted it. My intention was more for his image than to sleep alone, but I let it go. I figured we'd deal with it when we got there. As long as he was ok with us in the same room, I'd be ok with it.

After their show in New Orleans that night, it would be on the bus and off to their next stop. I was already a little leery of the bus trip. After all, my last encounter with the BSB bus left me in the hospital. But, I figured I could always use Nicky as a human shield, so it was all good.

We'd decided to go with an early morning flight on Monday rather than a Sunday one. The guys were slated to perform in Houston on Sunday night, so, since they were staying in town that night, we decided it'd be easier to catch a wake-up flight the next day. I cleared it with Anna that I'd be in an hour or so late on Monday. She said that was fine. She was just glad that I was doing better. I let her know I appreciated it.

Lindsay juggled a few things in her schedule so she could see us off tomorrow. She was already free Monday morning, so she'd come get me when I got back. But, I didn't want to think too much about that. Just the next few days.

Linds took off around 5:00. She had to get home and get a little nap in before taking off to work the night shift. I never really understood how she could stand that, but she'd told me she actually liked it. It tended to be a little quieter, and, occasionally, she got to really know a few of the patients, like me, who didn't sleep much. I thanked her for all her `help' before she left, and let her know I would seek revenge when the time was right.

The minute she left, I turned to Kevin and threw my arms around him.

"I love you," I said, just before I leaned in to kiss him softly. This one was as earth shattering as all of his kisses were, but before we could really get into it, Kev's stomach let out a growl. We both broke apart, laughing.

"I guess I'd better feed you, though, huh?" I giggled at him.

"And yourself. It's time to put some meat back on those bones!" he said. I hoped he missed the blush on my cheeks. Damn did my mind go places when he said that.

"Whatever you say, dear," I replied, moving off to the kitchen to start dinner.