This is my first story. As always, if you're not supposed to be here, please leave. In other words, if men kissing, fucking, or doing anything remotely sexual offends, disgusts, or angers you then you should get out of here. This story includes sex between two men. But it is at heart, a love story. Plenty of sap, romance, and professions of love. So be warned. This work is copyrighted and may not be used without explicit permission from the author.
Comments, suggestions, complaints are all much appreciated and welcomed at grassisb@aol.com.
Thank you to everyone who has sent encouraging notes and suggestions so far. It means a lot. Keep them coming. I love hearing from all of you.
Also I thought I should mention that while David and Sam do not use protection in this story, you should. This is fiction where most things end happily. Alas life is not always the same. Better be safe than sorry.
The songs "Marry Me" and "Butterflies" are copyrighted to Velvet Apple Music. Words and Music by Dolly Parton.
This installment took forever. I apologize for that. Unfortunately my laptop was destroyed and all of my files went along with it. I started to write from scratch and then the summer came along and after grading papers and writing all year long, I kinda needed a break. But alas, I'm now recuperating from surgery and a stay in the hospital (what fun!) So after three days of "As the World Turns," I've decided writing seems to be more constructive. Plus that is what they invented TiVo for.
I want to thank John, who I lost touch with but who kept on me about this story and was so kind with his comments. He has a great story called "Splash in the Pool" in the Beginnings section y'all should check out. And thanks again to all those who have written asking what happened and all those who have complimented the story.
The story picks up a day after the last chapter happened. It'll be confusing at first but it will all come together. Trust me.
Enjoy, Anthony
Present Day
"What you need is to get some ass!" My sister was stirring milk into her coffee when she decided to just blurt this little tidbit of information. One would think that getting married and having a child would soften her bluntness. Unfortunately it egged her on. She now made it her personal duty to make sure everyone was getting some. And I, of course, was at the top of her list.
"Would you please be quiet. My son is in the other room." I always tried to act like the mature one.
"Oh please. Like he hasn't heard worse at school." She was rifling through the refrigerator looking for something. "Where is that chocolate cake I had in here?"
I laughed. "Maybe you ate it." I knew where it went. My brother in-law Noah had a mild heart attack two years ago. Now it truly was mild. Not too take away from it but it was more from stress at work than anything else. That didn't stop Isabel from putting both of them on a strict diet. What she did to the poor man.
She looked up. "I had it in here for you and Mikey." She thought for a minute. "If that son of a bitch ate it, he's a dead man."
"Maybe if you didn't feed him watercress all the time, he wouldn't act like a kid in a candy shop." I was just glad that the subject had changed.
"It's for his own good." She said exasperated. "It's bad enough I can't monitor what he eats at the office." She smiled. "The other night he thought he was so smart. Came home and said he was starved." She laughed her trademark high pitched laugh. "All he had to do was kiss me and I could taste the french fries on his breath. I swear to you. He will be the death of me."
I couldn't help it. I didn't mean it. I really didn't. But I couldn't help but be a little jealous. I used to have that. That feeling of love, of playfulness. But it was taken away from me. She saw the wince. How could she not? My sister knew me better than I knew myself.
"I'm sorry." We both blurted it out at the same time.
She was at my side in a second, reassuring me. Telling me everything was going to be okay.
"I miss him so much. I think about him now more than I have in the past." I was bawling now. A trademark as you all should know. "Why can't it get easier. I don't want to forget him. I really don't. But all I want is for it to just get..." This was ridiculous. I had to get a hold of myself. I looked up at her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get out of hand like that."
"Don't you dare apologize. There is absolutely nothing to be sorry about." I could always count on my sister to be there for me.
I wiped my face with a tissue. "I just feel like everyone has moved on. They remember him but they can still live each day without..." I smiled. "... without acting a bit insane."
"He was your husband sweetie. Your lover. The person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. There is no reason why you shouldn't feel the way you feel." She sat back down in her chair. She looked at me for a long time. "I think..." she started carefully, "... I think you might need to see someone."
The look on my face must have told her just how bad I thought her idea was. "I'm not crazy." I paused. "Though I'd be the first to admit that was certainly questionable."
She laughed. "You aren't crazy. And I wasn't talking about a shrink either. I meant a group or something. Like one of those bereavement groups. Meet some people who are going through the same thing you are."
I can't believe I'm saying this but it actually was not that bad of an idea. I didn't really get out of the house much. Who am I kidding? The only things I did were go to work and take care of my son. I looked towards the living room where he was sitting playing with my nephew. He was smiling and making funny faces. Little Sam apparently thought he was hysterical.
I thought about the conversation we had had a few weeks ago. I looked at my sister again. "He asked me when I was going to start dating again."
She looked surprised but smiled. "The boy is much more perceptive than you give him credit for." She took a sip of her coffee. "What did you say?"
"I told him I wasn't ready." She grimaced and was ready to say something but I interrupted her. "Maybe am I... I don't know. But the more important thing is that he said he's ready." I smiled. "He told me that he thinks its time." I laughed. "My son is giving me relationship advice."
She smiled that smile that always made me feel okay. The "big sister" smile I called it. "Maybe you should listen."
I thought about that for a minute. "Maybe I will."
Chapter Four - Marry Me "Well I met a boy from Grassy Branch, fine as he can be I met him at the big barn dance , and he took a shine to me Sky blue eyes, a big white smile and tall as a sycamore tree He's real smart with a real big heart and he's gonna marry me." "You okay?" He was so nervous. So was I. But he had more of a reason to be. "I'm fine for the thirty seventh time." He looked at me ready to say something but I interrupted him. "And I am not mad at you either." I smiled and gave him a peck on the lips. "And..." I whispered. "I love you more than life itself." He smiled and I realized how much he really, really needed to hear that but at the same time how much I needed to say it. He looked at me for a second. "You always know exactly what to say." He looked around the plane. "I really don't want to do this you know." I massaged his hand. "We have to. As much as you don't want to." He made a face. "Babe. He was your father." He went to interrupt but I wouldn't let him. "Maybe not the best father but your father nonetheless. It's the right thing to do." I smiled. "And just think about what's waiting for us at home." He smiled. "Yeah." He yawned. He was so tired. He got no sleep last night. He rested his head on my shoulder. "Mind if I stay here awhile." I laughed. "Not at all." In a matter of minutes he was out like a light. I tried to take a nap but I was thinking about so many other things. I had planned to hate Earl Warren. It was as simple as that. From the little bit that Sam had told me, I just wished I had been there to protect him from such a hateful spiteful man. But what I heard last night literally shook me to the core. I, myself, had experienced parents who were at times so mean and callous, I didn't think I could possibly be related to them. Earl Warren, though, was in a league all his own. And yet, as much as I hated it, I actually felt sorry for him. Dying in a drunken stupor with no one around. In reality, he deserved worse than that for what he did to my precious Sam but at the same time, I knew how much I still loved my father even after he seemed to disown me. And after the reunion of sorts that we shared only a day ago, I also realized just how much I missed him. But with the addition of little Michael to our family, those thoughts of Earl and his death seemed to be put on the back burner. I tried to coax Sammy into talking about it after we had Joanna and Michael settled but he wouldn't. I did however hear the soft crying he did when he thought I was asleep. I only hoped traveling to his home to bury his father would somehow give him some sense of closure. I let out a dramatic sigh and pulled up the arm rest allowing my lover to snuggle in closer. I really didn't care much what people thought. He was hurting and I was there to comfort him. I looked out the window and thought about the last few days and all of he incredibly odd, fast yet wonderful things that had happened to me. My life had certainly changed in the past three days. And surprisingly it didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. I was in love, I had a new home, I had a family. Things I'd always dreamed of. But it was the last one that sort of threw me for a loop. I fell in love with Sammy's brother as soon as I saw him and there was no doubt in my mind as to whether or not we would take this boy and raise him as our own. But at the same time I still had so many questions, so many insecurities. How would he feel about having two fathers? Would that make him gay? Could we still have sex in the apartment? What would his friends think of the gay thing? It was a list that could go on forever. I still didn't have the answers. Maybe I never would. But I also knew something. Even with everything that had happened, I was still happy. Ecstatic actually. I was engaged to a man that I was head over the heels in love with. We now had a son. Everything seemed to be falling into place. The questions, I suppose, will be there always. That's just the way I am. But as I sat there looking at this beautiful man who was mine, it didn't really make a difference."Samuel Warren! How are you?" It was a high shrieked voice. Almost childlike. She was waiting for us outside the airport terminal. She took Sammy's cheeks and pinched them. "I missed you so much."
He laughed and grabbed my shirt sleeve pulling me over. "David, I want you to meet Leanna Taylor." I stuck my hand out but she pulled me into a hug. I kept forgetting we were in the south.
He looked at her. "Leanna, I want you to meet David." I guessed he would leave it at that. I wasn't sure if he wanted anyone to know about us and it didn't really bother me that he didn't. But then he surprised me. "My fiancee." My heart did a small flutter.
If she was surprised, she didn't show it. She just hugged me harder. She looked at me and smiled. "Looks like he found a looker." At that I blushed. She stepped back and brushed herself off. "Alright. We need to get going. Do you have checked luggage?"
I shook my head. "No. We just decided to carry on."
She smiled. "Good. We have an hour drive to the house." She turned to walk but then turned back towards me. "You'll love the scenery though."
She started to walk and we followed. When she was a bit ahead of us, I looked at Sammy and whispered. "Kinda brave of you?"
He smiled. "I'm not gonna lie. Whoever likes it, likes it. If they don't, they can fuck off."
We walked the rest of the way to the car in silence. I was really just taking everything in. The airport wasn't really as I'd expected. I suppose being a New Yorker I'd conjured images of Tennessee that were well... unfair. But Knoxville was just as bustling as JFK and much to my surprise, everyone there wasn't wearing overalls and a straw hat. God imagine what they say about New York?
I'm afraid I didn't exactly see much scenery. I conked out about ten minutes in. The next thing I remember is being shaken awake by Sam. I was still a little groggy and instead of just getting up I pulled his face down to mine and gave him a nice sloppy kiss. Then realizing where I was, turned about seven shades of red. He, of course, thought this was hysterical. As did Leanna.
She looked at Sammy and smiled. He smiled back. "I told ya he was a good kisser." She laughed and made her way into the house.
Stepping out of the car, I realized that we were practically in the middle of nowhere. The next house was barely visible. There was a huge field that I assumed was for farming. The house itself was old-fashioned but there were modern touches. Painted a simple yellow it was what someone from New York would call a country house. The grounds were kept immaculate. At least twelve different kinds of flowers. The grass smelled freshly cut. It really was quite beautiful and not at all what I expected.
"I wanna fuck you." He whispered this seductively as he wrapped his arms around me from behind. "I wanna lick you all over your. I wanna open you up with my tongue. So much that I can just slide right in." Of course all of this was said in that wonderful southern drawl which for some strange reason seemed to now be more pronounced. My dick responds to any form of sex talk. But when it's spoken with a southern voice, well let's just say I was a happy camper.
He suddenly unwrapped his arms from around me and gently pushed me.
"Come on. I wanna show you something." He whispered.
He walked in front of me and the only thing I could think of was how a person could have an ass that looked that good. His pants seemed to fit perfectly clinging in the right places. As we were walking he held his hand out to me and entwined his fingers with mine. That just felt so right.
"Where are we going?" I asked since it looked like we were walking towards the middle of nowhere.
He laughed. "You'll find out soon."
And I did. Exiting the field I saw a huge tree. I'm not exactly sure what kind it was but on top was a wonderful tree house. I had always wanted one but we lived in the city when I was younger. I remember hiding under my bed and pretending that I was up in my tree house. Isabel thought I was nuts but I loved it.
"You built this?" I asked as I edged closer inspecting.
He smiled. "Me and Kenny." At the mention of that name his face saddened. "Took us two years." He grabbed my hand. "Wanna see it?"
I smiled. "I do."
He climbed the rickety ladder first and still holding my hand guided my uncoordinated self up. Seeing his perfect ass wiggling above me made the trip much more interesting. He hoisted himself into the hole at the top and then pulled me up behind him. While trying to stand up, I tripped and fell face first taking Sammy along for the ride. Neither of us were hurt and laughing hysterically I straddled his waist.
Sighing dramatically he looked at me. "You didn't have to do that just so you could sit on my dick babe. You can do that anytime you want." He smiled that smile that I claimed to be mine and mine alone. I leaned down and kissed him. When we both had to come up for air, he looked at me. "I love you."
I smiled. It seemed like we were saying it constantly to one another. And I guess I realize how corny it sounds but it just never got tiring. I cocked my head. "Love you more."
He smiled devilishly. "Think so do you?" And with that he had skillfully flipped me over and was tickling the shit of me.
When we were finally both out of breath, we lay on the floor side by side. I looked around taking everything in. Posters, old and a little ratty, lined the walls. Mostly of Dolly Parton. I smiled and looked over at my lover. "She's everywhere you go isn't she?"
He laughed. "Yeah. Kinda sick I guess. But we both loved her. I never liked to hang the posters in my room because I was so afraid that my father would expect something. So we hung them here." He snuggled close to me and talked into my chest. "She played the Knoxville Arena when we were ten. We saved up for weeks." I could hear his smile. "That was one of the best nights of my life. It was like she was just singing to me." He lifted his head and looked at me. "She made it out of here. She was dirt poor and had absolutely nothing and she made it. Those songs just helped me so much. They helped me mute out the screaming and the cursing and the beatings. They made me so hopeful."
I knew he was on the verge of tears so I figured I'd lighten the mood. "What's your favorite song of her's?"
He perked up for a minute. "She has so many good ones but her best song, I think, is "Jolene." The lyrics are pure poetry. I have other favorites for different reasons. But "Jolene"is my all time favorite." He smiled. "But I used to win the karaoke contest at the local bar with "9 to 5" all the time. That one made me the most money."
He laid his head on my chest again and I lazily ran my fingers through his hair. I thought of something. "Babe, you up."
"Yep."
I continued. "When you said before you had absolutely nothing. Well I just wanted you to know that you have me now and Michael. We both love you more than life itself and neither of us will ever leave you."
Before I knew it, he had his entire body lying on top of me whispering over and over again. "How did I get so lucky."
I brought his face down to mine and gently kissed him. "We both did." I looked around and was reminded of something he said. "Sing me a song."
He looked at me strangely. "What?"
"You said you won the karaoke contest all the time. Sing for me. Please." I did my best pout.
He shrugged, unsure of himself. "It'll be embarrassing."
"No it won't. Baby come on. It's just me." I pouted again.
He sighed. "Why do you want me to sing?"
I smiled. "Cause I think it'd be kinda nice. Having my own little cabaret act anytime I wanted." He rolled his eyes. "Would you just sing. If you do, I might have a little reward for ya." And then I pouted for the third time.
Finally he relented. "Alright, alright. Stop pouting." He thought for a minute and smiled. "This one is really, really sappy but it pretty much sums up the way I feel for you." He closed his eyes but then opened them quickly. "And if anyone ever finds out about this, I will castrate you." Once again he closed his eyes and finally just sang.
I would spin for you a blanket out of gold and silver threads I would let my gentle bosom be a pillow for your head I'd caress your perfect body on a rosy bed at night Play you love songs on a golden harp and sing you butterflies In a diamond-studded chalice on an emerald-plated tray I would bring to you sweet nectar and gifts of bright array I would paint for you a castle in a blue and yellow sky Paint you happy ever after and paint you butterflies Butterflies, my heart flutters with the notion I get high on the wings of sweet emotion Darling I, I just think of you and I get butterflies
I get close to you and I get butterflies If only I were magic I would make the wishes true I would wave a magic wand and be in paradise with you But I'm just a boy that loves you I will love you all my life But I do have a magic feeling and it gives me butterflies Butterflies, my heart flutters with the notion I get high on the wings of sweet emotion Darling I, I just think of you and I get butterflies
When he finished, he finally opened his eyes. I could tell he was crying and lord knows, I knew I was. He tilted his face until our lips were only inches apart. And then he whispered to me. "I love you."
I kissed him gently. "That was beautiful. And I love you too."
We laid there silently for a few minutes before I heard the rhythmic sound of his breathing and I knew he was asleep. I lazily ran my fingers through his hair wondering for the umpteenth time how I could have gotten so lucky.
I gazed around the tree house and smiled at how innocent it all looked. I tried to picture a teenage Sammy sitting up here. I thought about the few things he had told me about his family life. About his mother, about his father. I wondered again if I'd ever know the full story. The night before, he was more preoccupied with the reunion with his brother which was certainly understandable. But as much as I wanted him to let loose, to grieve for his dead father, he didn't seem able to. There had to be such hurt there, such pain. I wanted to fix that. I wanted to transfer that pain to my self rather than see the one person who I loved more than life itself hurting so badly. And then I looked over at this man lying next to me. He looked so very peaceful, so innocent.
Quietly I eased myself away from him and walked over to the small window that was built into the house. I was still amazed at the beauty of it. I was lucky if I could hammer a nail into the wall. Looking out I saw something that amazed me. Just freedom everywhere. No streetlights, no traffic, no Starbucks. Just open space everywhere.
And then something on the wall caught my eye. It seemed to be a carving but I couldn't see what it said. Trying not to make too much noise on the creaky floor, I inched closer. And then I saw it. A small heart. Inside it said simply "Kenny loves Sammy." A twinge of jealousy jolted through my body and that made me feel even worse. How could I possibly be jealous? Who could not fall in love with my Sam? Frankly, I'd think less of someone who didn't.
I fingered the carving and again laughed at the innocence of everything in the room. It was so pure and so unadulterated. A boy's hopes and dreams were born in this room. He cried here. He loved here.
I was broken out of my reverie by two arms wrapping around my chest. I smiled. "How did you not make a sound on the floor?"
I felt his smile without seeing it. "Years and years of practice?" He kissed my neck. "Whatcha doing?"
I turned around to face him. "Just admiring." I looked at my watch. "We should get back. They probably think we're having hot wild sex in the woods or something."
He laughed. "That was the plan. But then I had to get all sappy on ya."
I kissed him. "I like ya sappy." I thought for a minute. "I'm here you know. If you need to talk or... well I've been through it... not like you have..." I was interrupted by a soft kiss.
He laughed. "You are fucking adorable when you babble." He nibbled on my lower lip. "I'm not ready just yet. It's not you. Believe me. I'd tell you anything. I just need to bury him first. And then..." He sighed. "Then I'll tell you everything." A single tear fell down his face.
I felt terrible. "I'm..."
He interrupted me again. "Don't you dare apologize. You deserve to know everything. Let me rephrase that. I want you to know everything about me. You're my family now David." He looked like he was pondering something for a second. "In fact, I think now would be the perfect time."
"Time for what?" I must have looked confused because he laughed at me.
He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out a tiny box. He looked at me. "I know you probably want to have some big ceremony. We can still do that." He opened the box to reveal two beautiful gold bands that matched the ones we had exchanged just yesterday. "And I know it seems a bit redundant to be doing this again. But I couldn't think of a better place." He took my hand and placed the ring on my finger.
"I take David to be my lawful wedded husband. To love and honor, to cherish and hold. In good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. As long as we both live."
I was standing there like a moron, my mouth gaping open and crying like a little girl. I had to get a hold of myself.
"You okay? You wanna do this or..."
"Of course. I just... I was surprised. I didn't... I wondered when..." Oh for Christ's sake. I smiled and took his ring from the box.
"I take Sam to be my husband. To love and honor, to cherish and hold. In good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. As long as we both shall live."
He smiled wickedly at me and pulled me into a kiss. Lots and lots of tongue was involved. Just the way I like it.
He pulled back and looked at me and just smiled. It was supposed to be such a bad day. But suddenly, it really wasn't all that bad.
"He's gonna marry me and we're gonna go to town
We're gonna buy us a real nice car and we're gonna drive around
We'll hold hand and touch and hug, he talks so sweet to me
Cause he knows a lot about love and stuff and he's gonna marry me."
I promise that the next chapter will not take anywhere near as long as this one did. I'm on the mend and I have plenty of time on my hands. And a Dolly blurb. In the first chapter I referred to her upcoming album as "Blue Smoke." That was the original title but the album was retooled and reworked to include only covers of 60's and 70's folk and rock classics. (Sucks because she's one of the best songwriters out there. And the title song was her best written song in years) But the result is well worth the effort. It's called "Those Were the Days" and has an awesome version of "Blowin' in the Wind" (better than Dylan's - believe me) and a fabulous bluegrassy "Turn, Turn, Turn." She does "Crimson and Clover" and "Imagine." (If it doesn't bring you to tears, then you're hollow inside) There are a bazillion guests from Aussie hunk Keith Urban (who gushes over her like there is no tomorrow - just another clue that he's definitely gay) to Tommy James to Judy Collins to Norah Jones. The CD comes out on October 11th and she's on a major tour right now (You've never lived until you've seen a Dolly show!). So that was my little sales push on behalf of Dolly. Lord knows, no one else does nowadays.