First i want to say sorry aout he chapter mix up from 10-13 they are now added thanks for reading-Jay ;-)
I was a trying to get to him and just stay by his side and hope that he would pull through. Kevin was pulling from the room as I was screaming trying to get in there. I slid to the ground and Kevin went down to the ground with me holding me telling me that it would be Ok. I knew it wasn't. But what could i do. I sat there on the floor, and i but my hands together. I prayed everynight and before i ate, but this time i was praying for God to keep him here. I didn't tell him if he did this i would never ask for anything again. I just asked him to help him pull through. I looked back into the window and the flat line was moving up and down again. I was relieved. The docotor came through the doors and told us that he was stable again and that we should go home and get some rest. I didn't realize how muchtime had passed. It was already two in the morning. I took one final look at Paul and then I went home. I was calm now that i knew Paul was ok. But i realized that now Kevin knew how much I still loved him.
"Hey Jay can i as you something" said Kevin
"Yeah go ahead"
"you still love him, don't you"
"Kevin can we talk about this later"
"Jay please just answer it"
"I've known Paul for four years and I fell in love with him at first site. I thought about him everyday and everynight. When i wrote in my journal. When i herd a sappy song. Hell even when i was doing a huge project for school. It started to subside last year. But when he came back. The feelings that i thought i had gotten rid of came rushing back. But the only thing that didn't come back was the fact that he had total control over me. I gained control of my self. I told my self if i fell in love with another person that i was going to stick with the no matter what. And you know what i did. I never lied i never cheated any of that. You wanna know why because it hurts like hell having some one cheat on you. It hurts like hell haveing someone lie to you. And i really don't want to be hurt so i treat others how i want to be treated."
"Jay i believe you. Although i know that you don't love me yet. I want to stay with you. You have been so helpful, i have know way of paying you back."
"i already told me how you could pay me back. I tld you just to stay truthful to me and then every thing would be fine."
"that Jay, that I can do."
"hey lets get some sleep in we have a long day ahead of us."
"yeah we do."
We went to bed Kevin wraped his arm around my waste. Next thing i know it was morning. I woke up facing Kevin. He was still asleep looking very peaceful. I didn't want to wake him. My cell phone rang on the dresser i answered it. It was Kevin's uncle. I told him to hold on why i woke Kevin up. After i woke Kevin up i went down stairs to cook breakfast. Kevin came down a few minutes later. When he came down he had a look of depression upon his face. I knew something was wrong.
"Jay come here."
i walked over to him. He kissed me on the lips then on the forehead.
"Kevin what's wrong."
"I'm going to be going upstate for a while. To live with my uncle."
"wha...why, what is going on"
"he has cancer and i'm the last family he has. My sister disowned him."
"ok. He needs you when are you leaving."
"..."
"Kevin"
"Tonight Jay at 7"
"I see, so umm. I guess you should be getting all packed huh."
"yeah i guess i should be."
"well umm...let me...im get a suit case for you"
"Jay i'm so sorry"
"no Kevin, it's fine you need to be wit your uncle i can't hold tha against you."
"he is under chemo so he shouldbe better soon. I'll be here to see you walk at graduation and if you don't mind. Would you like to go to the prom with me."
I smiled "of course. But prom is next week."
"so i'll make sure i will be here."
I just ran up to him and kissed him. Kevin had changed the way i looked at things for some reason i knew i was going to fall in love with him for a very long time. He was ligit about time i thought. People are some of the fakest things alive. Later on Kevin's uncle came over. I knew it was time. I kissed him goodbye knowing that i wouldn't be kissing his lips anytime soon. Went back in the house and then my phone rang. It was the hospital they told me that for emergency contacts i was listed for Paul and he had recovered and he was ready to go home. I hopped in my car and went over. I looked at him with all his clothes on looking down at the ground. He knew he had messed up big time. I walked ovr to him and stood infront of him. He slowly lifted his head up. When he realized it was me he jumped up and hugged me.
"lets get you home."
"Jay, where is home. Shane and I are done."
"You may keep fucking up but Paul you have a home with me."
"Jay how can i repay you"
"just stop with all he nonsense. And keep your hands to yourself"
"I understand, thank you."
"Let's go"
"hey where is Kevin"
"Kevin had to leave for a few months. He will be back prom night though and also for grauation."
"wow seems like you got a pretty good guy"
"yeah i guess"
"Jay this isn't to akward for you"
"what"
"me being here after i caused most of this"
"Paul you know me. If i didn't want you here i would tell you to leave. I'm fine."
"ok i just didn't want to intrude"
"intrude on what me being in this house alone."
"haha well"
"hahhaha yeah don't worry i'm happy i have some company."
A few weeks past and it was prom night. It really didn't mean anything to me so this year i didn't wear a tuxs even though it was senior year. I wore an all white Harrison seersucker suit, with white steve maddens. The limo was on it's way i called Kevin because he wasn't there yet and prom started in three hours.
"hey Kev. Where are you."
"i'm at home baby why whats wrong"
"what's wrong is that it is prom night and you said you would be here."
"oh god that tonight."
"yeah it's tonight Kevin i thought you said you were going to remeber."
"I'm so sorry. When does it start."
"it starts in three hours"
"i can make it we can arrive a little late you know... Um then go out for dinner later."
"forget in Kevin i'm not even in the mood anymore. I gotta go and call some things off. Bye"
I hung up and went upstairs to get undressed. Paul was coming out of the shower.
"where are you going sir" said paul
"i'm going to bed"
"why are you going to bed isn't tonight prom night"
"it was prom night"
"what did the school cancell"
"no Kevin did, so i'm out of a date tonight"
"well i don't know if your comfortable with this but would you like for me to go with you. I know it's not he same as Kevin going but. Hey at least you can have some fun."
"oh my god you would really do that"
"yeah why not Jay i'm your friend i hate seeing you unhappy."
"aww thats so sweet but you doing even have anything to wear"
"is saks still open."
"yeah they close at 8:30"
"well then i have something to wear"
"lets go."
We got to the store and the guy helped us out with a really nice suit. Then we were on our way the limo picked us up from the store and took us off to the prom. Two hours and a half had already passed, and Kvin wasn't even on my mind Paul and i were haveing a great time. We were dancing and joking. I was happy Paul offered to go. I was having so muchfun. While i was dancing with Paul. I looked up and saw Kevin. He walked over to us.
"thanks Paul for covering, but can i have this dance." said Kevin
Paul looked at me and shook his head
"sure Kevin he's all yours, i'll meet you back at home Jay" said Paul
Kevin and i danced a little but i didn't have as much fun with him like i was having with Paul. Finally we went out for dinner after 12am we didn't talk to much i was really upset with him. The limo took him to the airport were he was going to catch his flight back home. I kissed him goodbye. And then once again he was gone. I got home and Paul was in the living room watching TV.
"anything good on" i said
"nope."
"well thats to bad"
"yeah it is."
"hey Paul about tonight i'm sorry"
"it's cool Kevins your man if he wanted the dance than it's his"
"Paul i can see that your pissed about it. I know that your night was pretty much shot when you saw him"
"yeah it was because he forgot a day that is suppose to be special to you."
"yeah i know"
"Jay it's werid to me ok something isn't right about him."
"how do you know Paul you barely know him"
"I know that you wern't on his mind tonight"
"you know what i need to get in the shower"
"have fun"
I went up stairs. I knew Paul was right I wasn't on Kevins mind tonight. But something was and i wanted to know who or what.
I got out of the shower and went in Pauls room. He was laying in the bed staring at the cieling.
"hey there" i said
"hey"
"how you doing"
"i'm ok"
"Paul i know you your not ok."
"Jay i just don't understand why you stay with guys that do you dirty."
"well ever guy i have been with has done me dirty, some time you just have to forgive"
"well it seems really hard for mr to get forgiveness from you."
"Paul i forgave you."
"yeah sure you did"
"ok i'm not going to aruge about this"
"then don't Jay, Don't argue just let Kevin do you wrong some more. Hey and don't coming crying to me when he breaks the gental fucking heart of yours. Because yeah i'm thankful for what you have been doing for me but i'm going to tell you I told you so."
"you know what Paul fuck it fine tell me you told me so. I'm going to remind him about graduation"
"if he cared like i do he would know when you graduate"
"whatever"
I went into the other room. I got on the phone with Kevin.
"hey baby" said Kevin
"hey i'm just reminding you about graduation. I really want you to be there"
"yeah yeah i'll be there hey Justins here i'll call you later. I will also be there this weekend so i'll see you then and i want you to meet justin"
"umm. Yeah are we going to have some time to ourselves"
"..."
"hello Kevin"
He hung up the phone. I went to bed and then woke back up in the middle of the night. I don't want to sound weird but i need to see Paul. I went over to his door and i saw him sleeping so silently. I went back to my room and fell asleep. The weekend came and Kevin wanted me to meet him at a resturant down town for dinner. Justin was there. He was a pretty hot guy i must say. Tall, muscular and a great smile. He had a great personality also. After we ate we went to the car. Kevin unlocked the doors and Justin got in the front seat. Kevin got in.
"you getting in"
I looked at him like well if i'm your man shouldn't i get in the front.
"Jay just get in the back"
"Kevin can i talk to you for a sec."
"what is it"
He said it with additude
"first you need to change your tone second what the fuck is going on do you always make you boyfriends sit in the back seat."
"Jay either you can get in the car or you can walk home."
"you know what fuck you Kevin, I rather walk"
"why you gotta be acting so fucking stupid"
"why do you have to be such a dick wad"
"fuck you you can walk"
"he got in his car and drove off."
I sat there thinking how right Paul was. Then i look up and it's a guy standing in front of me.
"Hey stranger."
It was....
Well thats all for now. Works hectic nowadays so i'll try to work to get the next Part done. Let me know who you think the person should be i already have someone in mind but i'm not he one who has to read it luvs and hugs :-)