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Chapter 12
I was softly awakened by a kiss on my lips. I kept my eyes closed and savored the moment. I felt Eric's naked body climbed on top of mine and the warmth that generated from our bodies was unexplainable. It felt like it was about 2 o'clock in the morning, I didn't check the time and I didn't care to check it either, all I wanted was for Eric to continue what he was doing. Eric began to stoke my hair and whisper sweet words in my ear. This guy really loved me and I felt so unworthy of his pure love for me.
"I love you, Taylor." He whispered. "You don't have to say anything, I know you love me, you just don't want to admit it yet."
I really wanted to tell Eric that I loved him too, but like he said, I wasn't ready, and I won't be ready until I get a taste of Adam. Loving Eric means I would have to be totally committed to him and our relationship, that type of love was too much for me right now.
Eric moved down to one of my most erogenous zone, which are my nipples and an involuntary groan slipped out. The feeling of his warm moist tongue flickering on my nipples made me so horny, that I began to cry out Eric's name in ecstasy. I wanted to feel him inside me, deep and strong. Lately, Eric and I have had sex at least twice a day and this morning was no exception.
Eric ate my entire body like I was simply irresistible to him. He attacked my manhole, forcing his thick warm tongue in and out of my ass. The feeling was so incredible that it overwhelmed me beyond measure. I just couldn't get enough sex, this was the best thing I ever felt in my damn life. No matter how many times I did it, it was never enough. I reached for the lubricant and handed it to Eric. He rubbed some in my ass and then some on his cock. I watched him as he placed my legs on top of his shoulders and then positioned his cock at the entrance of my manhole.
As he slowly pushed his rod inside me, the expression on Eric's face showed how much I made him happy. He began to moan softly and I followed. Eric picked up his pace and started fucking me harder and deeper, slightly meandering his waist as he pushed. We fucked like it was our last time on this earth. Eric leaned forward and I placed my feet on his chest, bending my knees quite a bit.
I started grinding my teeth together because of the pleasure I felt and because of the pressure and the force Eric fucked me with. He was drenched in sweat and so was I. The bed was rocking feverishly and I feared that someone next door might be disturbed by the sexual commotion. We were far-gone in ecstasy to care about our neighbors. Then suddenly, I heard Eric growled and I knew he was cumming with an explosion. I shot my load all over the place seconds before Eric came. I felt his warm jist spraying deep within.
I was spent and so was Eric. We just lay there for a few minutes to catch our breath. Then Eric climbed of me and sat up in the bed with his head hung.
"Hey, what's up?" I asked, with concern.
"It's nothing." He said softly. "I'm just thinking how much you mean to me."
"You mean a lot to me too Eric." I assured him.
"Then why it's so hard for you to commit to me?" He questioned. "We have great sex and I know you can't disagree with that. I know everything about you, and we enjoy being around each other. What I'm I lacking?"
Where did all this came from? I was so tired and wasn't up for a talk after an intense fuck, but Eric deserved my attention regardless. I really thought about what he said before I gave him an answer.
"That's just it, Eric. You're lacking nothing." I told him. "I'm not good enough for your love. You love me beyond all my faults and mistakes. How can I offer you something in comparison with that?"
"Taylor, don't say things like that. You've given me so much and I can't imagine how my life would be without knowing you." He said, so passionately. "All I'm asking from you is for you to trust me, give us a chance and I promise I'll take care of you."
"It's not that easy." I said, almost tearfully. "I don't want to hurt you, Eric."
"And I don't want to rush you into something that you're not ready for, but I want to make you realize that everything in life is a gamble." He told me. "I don't know for sure what the future holds, but you have to take risks sometimes. Sometimes you'll win some and some you'll loose."
"You're so confident and positive about your outlook on life." I said. "Eric, I do love you, I really do, but I'm scared."
"I'm scared too, Taylor, but I believe in you so much."
"Don't say that." I told him. "Please, give me time to accept your love for me, because you deserve more, and please don't say anything else this morning, just lay next to me and put your arms around me."
With that, Eric surprisingly obeyed. During the following two hours as Eric hugged me and eventually had fallen asleep, I thought about so many things. I thought about Adam mostly. If Adam and I ended up together, the pain Eric's heart will feel would be unmentionable. I couldn't do that to Eric. Oh man I was so confuse about this decision.
The following day was Friday. Eric had left earlier and went home to get dress for work. I don't think I ever mentioned what Eric did. Anyway, he was more like a freelance designer, so he could move around more and spend time with me. I was so thankful for him in my life, but ever since Adam started going to Phis University, things were never the same for me.
All day I didn't hear from Adam, neither Bruce. I hated this feeling of not knowing what was going on. So I decided to go over to their apartment. When I got there, I knocked and there was no answer. I looked in the parking lot and Adam's red mustang wasn't there. I started fretting right away because I was hoping he didn't go back to that manipulating bitch.
Night had fallen and I sat at my study desk, working on my thesis. Suddenly, the phone rang. It was Toby. Toby was the DJ of the hottest gay club in Tampa. Man, I haven't heard from Toby in ages. I met him when I use to go clubbing until the wee hours of the morning. I slowed down and almost stopped completely because my grades were horrible. Toby was trying to convince me to visit the club that night. This is how that conversation went...
"Hey guy, Toby here." He hailed.
"Oh man, this is a surprise!" I exulted. "I haven't heard from you since..."
"Since the last time I had to carry your ass home, you were like so totally wasted dude." He finished, with a hard laugh.
"Gosh, seemed like a century ago." I said, in sheer embarrassment.
"Anyway, I haven't hear from or seen you in a while and I figure you were doing OK." He paused shortly. "What are you doing tonight?"
"Well, I'm just sitting here working on my thesis. Why'd you ask?" I inquired.
"I just thought you might want to be here to see your favorite band play tonight." He teased.
"You mean 'FratBoys' are playing tonight?" I asked, in a jubilant voice.
"The one and only." He said, knowing he got my full attention.
I was so excited, and a feeling came over me that I haven't felt for a long time. I felt like all my depression was behind me just for that moment. I started to remember those days I use to go clubbing and how all those sexy guys use to be checking me out. I had totally forgotten about that part of my life, mostly because I was so fixated on things that was happening in my life lately. I thought to myself that this would be a good way for me to relieve some stress. Adam wasn't home and I could work on my thesis later, so I figure I should go and enjoy myself for once.
"I'll be there." I told him.
"Bring your off spray, so those guys won't bother you." Toby said, laughing.
"Oh please!" I said, laughing along with him.
I went in my closet and looked for the sexiest, and the most provocative clothing I could find. I really felt happy and problem free. I had no intentions of bringing any guys home tonight because I had Eric and I wanted Adam. I just wanted to have some fun. I longed to feel the vibration of the music pumping through my body and to see those lights flashing all over the room.
An hour later, I was pulling up to the best gay club in town. I could hear the raging music blasting from the outside as I climbed out of my SUV. As I began to walk towards the club, I noticed these two guys staring me down and one of them winked at me. I smiled and walked inside. I thought to myself, that I still have my shit going on.
When I truly walked inside that club, the smell of excitement overwhelmed me, and my eyes just lit up to see so many guys shaking their asses. My goodness, so many of them had such fine bodies, and then I wondered what the hell kept me away for so long. I looked over to the right and saw Toby in a booth doing his thing. He noticed me and beckoned me to come near him. Man, as I moved towards, pulsating bodies made it almost impossible for me to get through.
When I was finally near him, we had to holler very loudly above the music to understand each other.
"You look good." Toby shouted.
"Thanks." I hollered back. "Did the 'FratBoys' performed yet?"
"Yeah, but they're coming back on in about 40 minutes."
"Cool!"
"What?" He hollered.
"I said, cool!" I hollered back, but louder.
That music was blasting and I couldn't resist it any longer. I touched Toby and motioned to him that I was going on the dance floor. I'm not a person that brags but I'm a pretty good dancer, especially when I was drunk, but no vodka tonight. I needed to leave this place just the way I came. I made my way in the middle of the floor and started to shake my beautiful ass. Before I knew it, two guys enclosed me like a sandwich and were trying to match my vigorous movement. I actually felt the guy in the back of me with a rock hard-on and without thinking my cock started to twitch. I danced away all my depression that night.
After about half an hour on that dance floor, I decided I needed to take a break. So I went over to the bar tender and ask him for some tonic water. Now as I was consuming this non-alcoholic beverage, I noticed this guy in the crowd who looked like Bryan from my LAN class. I mean this guy was shaking like he had no bone in his ass. I couldn't get a really good look at him, but from what I saw, he looked like Bryan. I continue to drink my tonic water to reenergize myself, you know tonic gives you that extra boost.
The guy that I was looking at started to walk off the dance floor in my direction, but he stopped at the far end of the bar and didn't recognized me, I guess it was because of the type of lighting that was in the club. I looked closer and it really was Bryan. He was with this Latino guy and I wouldn't blame him. That guy was so beautiful and so sexy-looking. I wondered if they came in together or they just met here tonight. Bryan was looking sexy as well. He wore a see-through black pull over, with some white linen slacks. I must admit, I was a little jealous, but at the same time I was happy for Bryan if he had found someone to appreciate him.
I kept staring and lusting after this guy that Bryan was with. He had a nice ass and a nice face to go with it. I noticed that Bryan was staring at me too and it looked like he was trying to see if it was really I. He and the guy started to walk towards me and when it came clear to him that it was truly me, he gave me a big smile. I smiled back.
"What are you doing here?" Bryan hollered.
"Just hanging out." I hollered back. "I didn't know this was your type of scenery."
"Yeah, there's a lot of things you don't know." He said, smiling. "Oh, Taylor, this is Oswaldo."
"Nice to meet you Oswaldo." I hollered, as I shook his hand.
"You can call me Ossie." He said, looking into my eyes.
I looked at Bryan and his eyes showed approval.
"OK, I'll call you Ossie."
"Are you alone?" Bryan asked?
"Yeah, just needed to get out." I shouted
"I know what you mean." Bryan said.
I noticed Oswaldo was really checking me out and I was very uncomfortable with it, since Bryan was standing right there. I think Bryan noticed too, but he played it cool.
"You wanna dance?" Bryan asked me.
"I'm beat, man." I lied, because it didn't seem right for him to ask me in front of Oswaldo like that.
"Go on, don't feel bad because Bryan ask you to dance in front of me." Said Oswaldo. I'm cool with it, because I want a dance with you when he's through."
I didn't know what to say, because he caught me off guard with that one. Bryan smiled, but I could tell it bothered him a bit. Bryan motioned for me to join him on the dance floor and I did. As soon as I got on the dance floor, Toby was introducing 'FratBoys' for the second time and I started screaming my head off. I love those guys and the crapy songs they sang. The electric bass guitar filled that place and the crowd went wild. For the first time, I didn't think about anything, except for having fun that night.
Bryan and I were having so much fun on the dance floor that we forgot about Oswaldo. That's when I felt these arms gripped me from behind and someone winding on my ass. I looked back and it was Oswaldo getting his freak on. I looked at Bryan and his expression was very displeasing. So I tried to move away from Ossie, but he just kept coming closer. Honestly, I loved every second of it, but I had to hide it from Bryan. This Latino guy really can shake and I was truly turned on by him. I think he knew this and acted on it in a very subtle manner.
I had to think of something quick. I grabbed Bryan into me suddenly, and then turned him around so that my cock was pressing against his ass. I locked my hands around him and we wind slowly to the ground and then back up again. I started to think about that time we fucked and my cock started throbbing. Another reason why I stopped going to clubs was because I usually got carried away and tonight if I don't stop while I'm ahead, I know I might do something I'll regret.
I knew I was making Bryan horny and I really didn't want to spark the fire between us, oh my goodness, did I say us? I meant, well, you know what I meant. Maybe it was too late, because Bryan turned back around and started kissing me with those beautiful lips. I reciprocated right away. I felt when Oswaldo began to massage my ass with his hands and I didn't think once about stopping him. I was really getting into it and in the back of mind, as usual, I knew this was leading to something I didn't want. For once I started to listen to that inner voice and pulled away from Bryan abruptly. I brushed Ossie's hand away from my ass and walked off the dance floor. Bryan understood, but Oswaldo was persistent. He followed me back to the bar.
"What's up?" Ossie inquired.
"I'm seeing someone." I told him.
"So, I'm seeing someone too." He shouted.
"Look, you have everything going on for you and I'm sure Bryan likes you a lot. But I can't give you what you want." I told him, as the music died down.
"Too bad, tonight could have been a night you'd remember for the rest of your life." He told me.
"Really, why is that?" I inquired sarcastically.
"Why don't you come and find out." He persisted.
"Nah, that's OK. I'm leaving soon anyway."
Bryan came over and gave Ossie this warning look. It looked like Bryan and this guy had already fucked, they were sending too many mixed signals. I wondered what devious plan Ossie had on his mind. Maybe he wanted a threesome. If that's what he wanted, then he was out of luck, because I have already closed that part of my life with Bryan. Tonight I almost went over the edge, fortunately, I was wise enough to sober up.
"Are you OK, Taylor." Bryan asked, as he sat next to me on the left, since Oswaldo was sitting on my right.
"Yeah, I'm cool, but I'm thinking about leaving soon." I told him.
"Why, you haven't been here three hours good yet and you're thinking about leaving." Bryan inquired.
"Yeah, I know, I have things to do you know."
"I hear you, man." He said, understandingly.
Oswaldo noticed that I was serious and I wasn't going to give it up to him tonight, so he gave up from wooing me into his chambers. I'm starting to learn my weak areas and I'm trying my best to overcome them. Bryan and Oswaldo went back on the dance floor.
A few minutes later, Toby came and sat next to me at the bar, boy was I popular tonight. For the sake of your curiosity, I will briefly describe my history with Toby. Honestly, there is nothing much to say, except for that one kiss inside his car. Basically that happened because I was high on marijuana that night. I don't make it a habit by puffing my life away, but I strongly believe in trying everything once. Toby is very eccentric and for me, it was cool to hang around him. I was 18 and had just entered college for the first time. At the same time, I was looking for a cool gay club to hang out in. So I started to search the Internet for some local club listings and a particular ad caught my attention right away. It wasn't anything dramatic, just the words that were written near the bottom were eye-catching. It said, "The first two drinks free for the sexy." Hey, I thought, this was right up my alley.
When I got there, the music was slamming and bodies were moving everywhere. 'FratBoys' was on the stage and their voices and the instruments they played had engrossed me. As I was standing at the door watching all this excitement going on, Toby pass along side me and made some type of remark. I really didn't hear a word that he said, because the music was so loud. He noticed I didn't hear him, so he stood next to me and repeated what he said. He complemented me on my sex appeal. I just thanked him as he danced back to his booth. That's when I realized he was the DJ. Toby wasn't that hot, but he had a sexy way about him. To make a long story short, Toby and I eventually became friends. He smoked pot and he enticed me to try it out. I was out of it after about 3 or 4 puffs. Toby noticed that I was in a vulnerable state and asked me if he could kiss me. Of course I said yes. Honestly, I had no memory of what happened after that kiss, I just found myself stretched out across my bed in my boxers the next morning. Maybe Toby and I fucked, but I couldn't say for sure.
"Hey sexy." Toby hailed. "I was checking you out all night.
"You were?" I said, jokingly.
"Nah, I was too busy checking out other guys." He said, laughing. "But on a serious note, it's sure good to see you here again."
"Don't get your hopes up so fast." I told him. "I don't think I'm going to start coming here on a regular basis again."
"Ahhh, you have man problems." He said exuberantly.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Yep. I saw how you turned down a good-looking specimen tonight." Toby said with a grin. "The Taylor I knew was more spontaneous."
"Well, what can I say? I've changed." I said smiling.
"uh-huh...not in a million years, dude."
"I'm serious." I told him. "When was the last time you saw me?"
"About five months ago, I think."
"OK then, a lot can happen in five months."
"I'm not convinced." He told me.
"That's sad."
"Why?"
"You don't believe I'm telling you the truth." I said, in a more serious tone.
"Well, if you say so, then I guess it's a good thing." Said Toby.
"Of course it is." I said, with a smile. "I'm doing this for my self-esteem."
"Yeah right. Your ego don't need to be encouraged."
"Why'd you say that?" I inquired.
"Because, you can have any guy you want."
Now I looked at the irony of what Toby just said. If that was true, why was it so difficult for me to make Adam mine?
"That is not always true." I told him.
"Name one gay guy that you wanted and never had." He challenged.
"Marvin." I said, with a grin.
"Oh please! The only reason you didn't fuck Marvin was because he moved before you got a chance to." Said Toby. "That boy was willing and ready. Don't play dumb, you know what I meant."
"Alright, you got me." I told him. "But there is this one guy who's frustrating the hell out of me. I've been trying to get him since the new semester started."
"Is he gay?" Toby questioned.
"Let's just say he's opening up to new things."
"Uh-huh. So, he's the guy that have you acting so strange?" Toby asked rhetorically. "He must be something."
"If you only knew." I teased.
I wondered who was taking care the music since Toby was sitting here talking to me. I looked back at the booth and saw some other guy inside of it. He seemed to know what he was doing, because the crowd was still hyped up. At that same time, Bryan and Oswaldo came off the dance floor and sat a seat down from Toby and me.
"Hey man, I thought you were leaving." Said Oswaldo.
"I thought so too." I told him.
"You were leaving?" Inquired Toby.
"Yeah, I was."
"That sound like a good idea. I'll just ask Shawn to take over for this evening and we can go back to your place." Said Toby. "Can you wait 15 minutes?"
I figured Shawn was the guy in the booth, but what was Toby thinking when he suggested the idea of going back to my place? Toby is definitely not going back to my place, I thought, but telling him this was going to be hard. Besides, I wanted to leave early enough to hail Adam before he was in dreamland. Oswaldo and Bryan stood there looking at me to hear my response.
I looked at Toby and started, "Hey, man, I know we haven't seen each other in a while and I know you want to do some catching up, but I can't do that tonight..."
"You're turning me down too?" Toby asked, astonishingly, also interrupting me at the same time.
"You're making me sound like I'm acting like a bitch." I told him.
"Frankly, you are acting like one." He said, coldly.
I truly resented what Toby said. It hurt me to know that someone I thought was my friend would actually say something like that. I wanted to cuss his ass out, but I decided it didn't worth my energy. I looked at Bryan and his eyes showed how bad he wanted to defend me, but he held his peace for my sake.
"Toby, I'm going to pretend like I didn't hear that, because I know you're a better person than what you're portraying" I told him.
"I hope you hear this, I don't give a shit." He said, sardonically. "Honestly, it seem like you're going through a crisis or something and I'm having second thoughts about you. Man, what's gotten into you?"
"Are you upset because I simply told you I didn't want to get together with you tonight?" I questioned.
"I'm not upset, I guess I didn't realized how much you've changed." He told me.
Truthfully, I didn't know whether I was a changed man or not, the only thing I knew was how bad my life needed some stability, and taking Ossie, Bryan, or Toby home tonight with me was not going to accomplish that. I still felt bothered about Toby being upset with me, he said he wasn't, but I think he was. Maybe he had it in his mind that he and I would fuck the night away. As interesting as that sounded inside my head, I knew it wouldn't be what I wanted in the long run. Bryan and Oswaldo left the bar and I appreciated Bryan for that, I knew it was his idea. He knew I felt a bit embarrassed talking to Toby in front of him and Ossie. I believed if he had stayed a little longer, a fight or a brawl may have broken out.
Toby and I eventually ended on a good note and he apologized for his actions. I left the club moments later. As I was driving back home in my SUV, I thought about the fun I had at the club tonight and how I was actually driving home without being intoxicated with alcohol. I turned on the radio to my favorite station, 93.3FM, and a song was playing by one of my favorite artist group, Dos of Soul. The name of the song they sang was 'When you come around.' I turned up the music and just let the words of that sound penetrated my mind. They sung the exact words that I wanted to say to Adam. A verse of the song goes something like this...
'Hey baby, from the first moment I saw you I lost control, all of my senses, baby
Oh darling, whenever you come around
You make me feel so weak baby, so weak.
I like the way you roll with your thang,
From the way you wear your hair,
To the sexy way you call my name, oh baby
Baby come closer, cause I got something I
Want to Whisper in your ear. You can trust
Me baby. Everything will be right, when
You come around...'
I felt so in love with Adam at that moment, and oh how I wished he was mines already. I couldn't believe how emotional that song was making me feel. The tears started to flow and my heart started to beat a little faster. I was also crying because Adam was upset with me and it was all Bruce's fault. Damned him for doing this to me. About 15 minutes later, I pulled up to my apartment complex and procrastinated getting out my vehicle. I glanced at my watch and it showed 12:47am. I also looked around for Adam's car and I was so happy to see it parked in his favorite spot. I wondered if Adam was sleeping, because if he were, I would hate to disturb him. But I really wanted to talk to him and explain some things to him. I didn't want to wait until tomorrow, because this was weighing heavily on my mind now.
I finally made up my mind to knock on Adam's door. I climbed out of my SUV and walked slowly to my destination, still wondering if this was a good idea. When I got to Adam's door, I just stood there for 3 whole minutes before I knocked. I heard the door slowly unlatched and then the door slowly opened. Adam poked his head through the door and looked at me. His beautiful face was so expressionless. I didn't know what to say to him, but I had to think of something fast.
"Hey." I managed.
Adam didn't say anything, he just looked at me. I was becoming worried that he probably knew what happened between Bruce and me.
"Look, I don't know what to say to you." I told him. "Please tell me you're still not upset with me."
Finally, I saw some type of response from Adam. He stepped outside and closed his door quietly. I wondered why he was being so quiet, maybe Bruce was asleep and he didn't want to wake him.
"Come here." He commanded, softly.
"What do you mean?" I inquired, because I was only standing a few feet away from him.
"Just come closer to me." He told me again.
Still a bit bemused, I complied. We stood there in kissing distance, just looking at each other. I closed my eyes because I was expecting to feel Adam's soft lips on mines. Instead, Adam just hugged me tightly. I didn't know how to respond, because I've never been that close to him. So many things were running through my mind. He felt so good, I can only hope I can hold him like this without his clothes on. For the next minute or so, Adam and I remained locked in each other's arms. I started to pull away because my cock began to throb and I feared Adam might have noticed.
"I'm not upset with you, Taylor." Adam said, as we pulled away completely.
"A minute ago, you had me fooled." I told him.
"I'm good at doing that, aren't I." Adam said, smiling. "Dude, it's been such a long day for me. I went out to relax and to do some thinking."
"So Bruce wasn't with you." I inquired.
"No. He left before I did."
"Oh, is he home now?" I asked, curiously.
"Yeah, he's asleep on the couch." Adam told me. "How strange he didn't stir when you knocked."
I thought that was strange too, but I was so relieved that that bastard didn't answer the door, I wasn't for his shit tonight. I wondered where Bruce went all day?
"I'm glad he didn't." I said. "Because I wanted to talk to you without him intruding."
"Dude, I'm still confuse about that scrabble you and Bruce had earlier today." He told me. "But, I'm sure it's a misunderstanding. Bruce misjudges people very early on before he really knows who they really are."
Adam was so sweet about the whole thing, but he didn't know Bruce and I almost fucked, and if he did find out, he definitely wouldn't be so calm about it.
"Let's not talk about Bruce anymore." I suggested.
"OK, what do you want to talk about?" He inquired.
"Let's talk about that hug you gave me." I said, smiling.
"It was just a hug." Adam said, blushing.
"Come on, it was more than that." I teased. "You held me like forever.
He laughed at that and then slowly turned serious.
"Dude, you're such a comfort." He paused shortly, and then continued. "I mean, you're so easy to talk to, I just don't see why Bruce don't see you the same way that I do." Realizing that he had mentioned Bruce's name, he quickly apologized. "Dude, I'm so sorry, we promised not to talk about him."
"It's OK." I said, understandingly.
He nodded, and then he looked away from me.
"What?" I inquired.
He turned back around, but had his head hung. "Taylor, when you kissed me the other night, I freaked out." He told me. "That was because I enjoyed it more than I was willing to admit. I don't know how my life is going to turn out, but however it does, I hope you remain my friend."
I was touched by those words and I also felt like I didn't deserve Adam's kind words. Suddenly, all my plans to seduce Adam seemed so small and stupid.
"I don't know what to say." I told him. "I just want to be here for you."
"I know, and that is such an amazing thing to me." He said. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"Can I hug you again before I go inside?"
I was more than willing to comply, but this time when we embraced each other for a second time, I saw Bruce looking through the window. He frightened the shenanigans out of me. Adam couldn't see him because his back was facing the window and I started to pull away, but Adam held me tighter. Suddenly, Bruce yanked opened the door and shouted...
"What the fuck is going on?"
To be continued...
Thanks for reading chapter 12 and I hope you've enjoyed it. Please stay tuned for the final three chapters of "Heart desires." Hopefully, these last chapters will be intriguing in every way and may the end please you.