"I AM AN ANTICHRIST!"
Here we go again...
"I AM AN ANARCHIST!"
This guy isn't serious...
"Shut the fuck up already!" I snapped at the guy with badly dyed green hair.
"Just because you smell like a pig doesn't mean you're an anarchist. And my sister saw you at church yesterday." He blushed slighty. Oh now, the almighty punk blushed.
"You shut the fuck up poser, you don't know shit about anarchy." Why? Because I know what SHOWER means? I hated this guy. I don't mind punx, but this guy stepped on my last nerve.
"And because you know a few Sex Pistols lyrics means you do? Hate to burst your bubble, but I'm pretty damn sure Sid didn't go to school at your age."His green hair and red face looked horrible together. No, wait, I LOVED it. It was about time someone shuts him up. The bus stopped. I went off the bus as quick as possible. He may not be too intelligent, but he sure can kick my ass. I turned back to see if he was following me. He wasn't. Thank god.
"Watch it faggot." I bumped into some guy and dropped all my books. Well isn't think just peachy. Now some hot girl is going to walk by and help me. Just like in a movie, 'cept the part where I tell her I have a crush on a guy. Fuck fuckidy fuck fuck. I grabbed my books and stood up. I hurrried to get to my locker and threw them in it.
"Dieeee.." Ash said in a monster-like voice and grabbed my neck then started to choke me.
"Ahh." I gasped and pushed her off of me.
"Are you fucking crazy?" I said, holding my neck. An evil smile appeard on her face as she hugged me.
"Sorry. What's up?" she said innocently.
"The sky." She laughed.
"I see you changed your line. No more 'My dick'?" she laughed at herself again.
I faked a smile and started to walk towards my class.
"Aiden... You wanna talk about it?" she whispered while she was walking next to me. What. The. Fucking. Fuck.!
"About what?" Stay calm, she doesn't know anything.
"Oh come on, I'm not stupid." Okay, so it's either she knows I'm gay or she knows about the other thing... No. I'm not gay and there is no other thing.
"You obviously are." I added, bored. I can't be bothered, actually. I don't care what she thinks. Ignore – On. Gotta fucking find Colin. Gotta ask him... A lot of questions. Ash was talking. I didn't listen.
"Aiden, are you listening to me?!" she shouted. Get over yourself, woman.
"Leave me alone, alright?! Just fuck off!" I snapped and walked away with everybody staring at me.
I saw down next to Colin at lunch. I had a whole plan on what I'll say to him, but I was quiet and just sat there while he ate. No one really bothered to ask neither one of us if we're alright, but atleast they left us alone.
"Hows your head?" I asked quietly, but made him jump slightly. He held his sandwich in front of his face so he didn't have to look at me. Eventually, he moved it down.
"You really should go." he mumbled in a more begging voice.
"Tell me what you were talking about at the hospital and I'll leave." I answered, getting annoyed by the sound of everyone around me chewing.
"I just told you what I think. I'm sorry." he said, looking at me. What was he sorry about? I didn't even know what he said meant.
"I don't understand-" I started.
"I know you're like me." me said quietly and sad. Like him?
"I'm not gay." I quickly said, raising my voice a little. He got scared by the tone of my voice and he looked down at the table. He took his plate and stood up to walk away.
"Wait." I said, grabbing his hand. He froze. He was scared shitless.
"I didn't mean to upset you." he said. I needed time to think about this... I wasn't gay. That I knew for sure. I may be weird, but I am not gay. I had to say something.
"I-I know you're not g-gay." he looked like a scared homless puppy. His eyes were begging and his face was sad. He pulled his hand away.
"S-Sorry. I-I didn't mean to-to upset you." I could swear he was going to cry. He was so scared. I would have hugged him right there and told him everything will be alright if I wasn't a complete ass.
"Snap out of it."
"Huh?" I look up to see Ash standing in front of me.
"Good morning." she laughed. I looked around to see I was still at the table, but Colin was gone.
"Day dreaming, are we?" she asked with an innocent smile. Did she really think I forgot what a bitch she is?
"Drop dead." I spat and turned around.
I sat down on the toilet seat and checked if the door was locked again. It was, but I turned the round key thing again anyway. Better safe than sorry, right? Okie dokie then, what was I suppose to do for the rest of this hour... Think. About... Math. Yeah, math was great today.
So I was lying. I could barely remember math, I slept through half of it. Who was I kidding? There were only three letters on my mind, and there's only one word that can come out of it. G, A, Y. Yeah, you guessed right, gay. Was I gay? Was I a freaking homo? Does God hate me THAT fucking much? Sometimes I wonder how come I'm not a on a wheel chair, but if somebody finds out about this, I sure as bloody hell will be. Give me anything, and I mean anything, and I will somehow get the word COCK out of it. Seriously.
Chair? That's how long I want the COCK to be.
Fruit? Mmm, bananas. Mmm, COCK.
A clock? 5 more minuts until I see you COCK.
Cock this and that. I couldn't even shower at school without getting a fucking boner by just thinking about the other guys being naked near me. So lets face it. I was gay... There you go. No problem.
I checked my watch. I had 15 more minuts. Sigh... I unlocked the bathroom door and walked out. I would have looked at myself in the mirror but they were fairly fucked up... S placed my hands on the cold window shelf to cool a bit. Then I remembered.
Colin! I get to have Colin now, right? Right? I felt so excited, so alive. I felt happy. To think how I could hug him, hold him, and kiss him... Oh god, I almost melted just to think about it...
He was just the sweetest thing you ever saw. He had blue eyes, not your normal blue, and not the baby blue either. They were deep, dark-ish blue eyes, just like the sea. He had long eyelashes that made him look even more innocent. His lips were just the right size, full and kind of fluffy-like. Just cute, perfectly cute. His face was angelic... But hell, so was his body. He wore pretty damn tight clothes, and do you see me complaining? Nope.
Wow... Being gay wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be. I smiled picturing his face.
"Get out." a harsh voice came from behind me and Colins face disappeared, and my smile with it. I turned around to see some idiotic jocks standing there, staring at me.
"Yeah, yeah, you own this school, I know." I mumbled and rolled my eyes. I felt the happiness in me fade away. I didn't feel life anymore, and I was yet again left alone and empty. Do you know how it feels? When you have so many reasons to cry, but you can't. You may have so many reasons to smile, but you're not bothered at all... You're just... Empty and there is really no other word for it. Empty and lonely. Never alone, but always lonely... That's how I felt most of the time. Like a rock. Completly emotionless...