This is a work of pure fiction, but based on the author's feelings,beliefs, and in some cases, experience. Come to think of it -- it mightnot be all that pure! There may be graphic sexual encounters at timesbetween males, so if this offends you, you are invited to retreat. If youare too young or it is otherwise illegal for you to be reading this kindif story, shame on you for reading it - - please stop here. If not, - -ENJOY! Cast of characters:
Michael Timothy Headly -- That's me!
Spike -- (Diane, my big sister)
Mary -- My mom
Tom -- My father.
Gilbert Blank -- Friend from Woodland
Joey Gray -- Gilbert's "little brother"
Bobby Pepper -- New friend
Arlo Gates - Orienteer
Randy Samson -- Arlo's roomie
James Samson (Jay) Randy's adopted brother and ... My Twin!
... From Chapter 9:
"Jay?" I whispered. He shouldn't have even heard me -- but he opened his eyes and looked at me. I told him what I was just thinking and asked if he had felt similar feelings at times -- not knowing why he felt that way.
"Yes. All the time. And -- um - " He stopped and looked up at his brother. "Randy?"
"Yeah?"
"I -- need -- to -- um -- stay with (is it Mike?) tonight."
"Oh. Well - Okay." Said Randy -- maybe sounding just a little hurt.
"Rand -- I need it! Please don't feel bad. Mike -- do you mind? I mean -- can I stay in your room for awhile? We need to talk -- huh? I mean - I'll lie on the floor if I have to, if you're worried about sleeping with a gay guy."
I smiled and pursed my lips.
"I'm used to it, Jay. I've slept with one all my life!"
Chapter 10 "See you boys in the morning!" said Randy and he left. I felt like his tail was dragging a little.
"What do you mean you've been sleeping with one all your life?" He said. I think he led a much more sheltered life than I did.
"Jay -- We're twins. We are more identical than either of us might have imagined ... if we could have imagined it!"
He looked at me, straining to make some sense of what I had said. He blinked and said, soberly, "Let's go to bed, Mike."
"I think that would be a good idea -- Brother!" I agreed. When I called him brother was the first hint of a smile I had seen since I met him.
As soon as we got into the room -- after he had retrieved his suitcase from his brothers room -- he sat on the bed. I started to turn off the light. "No -- don't. I mean -- I want to -- um -- I want to look at you -- for a while.
I smiled. I liked that idea. I got a sudden epiphany. I opened a drawer and retrieved a small super ball. I tossed it to him. "What's this?" He said.
"What it is isn't as important as how you caught it. Did you notice which hand I threw it with?"
"Your left?"
"You'd think so, huh? No -- I threw it with my right hand. You caught it with your left. True twins are identically opposite. I'm right handed."
"I'm left handed!" He said. "Oh! Something else!"
"What?"
"My heart -- it's on the right! And the more I think about it ... that pisses me off! My parents KNOW my heart is on the right and they always acted as if they wondered why! How many other things did they lie to me about?"
I put my hand on his arm. It was the strangest feeling. It was like an electrical shock -- but not quite. And ... it felt good. He looked up at me with sad eyes, but at the same time I could tell that he liked the feel of my touch too. "Jay -- maybe they didn't know that you were a twin. I still have to ask my parents about that one!"
"I dunno -- maybe they didn't. But the fact remains -- they have lied to me for the last almost nineteen years!"
"I know how you feel - "
"How could YOU know -- oh! I guess you do. And you said your parents told you the day you graduated? Was that supposed to make you happy?"
"It didn't! I was as pissed as you. And my sister -- who is about the same age as Randy -- didn't know either. She was pissed too! She was so pissed at them that she took me to San Francisco on Grad night.
"Why did she take you there?"
"That was when I came out to her."
"You came out to your sister and she took you to San Francisco? You lucky buggar! Did you -- um -- I mean -- what did you find there?"
"What surprised us was what we COULDN'T find! We couldn't find the gay district!"
"Huh? I thought the whole city was the gay district!"
"I guess we did too. We did finally find it." I said. I told him about our incident in the liquor store and we both laughed about that.
"So he thought your sister was a lez? That's rich! Did you -- um -- meet anyone there?"
"Yup!"
Jay's eyes lit up like there was neon behind them! He grabbed my right hand with his left. "Tell me about him!"
"Actually it was them." I said.
"Oh ... NO Shit? A three some for your first - ?"
"NO! No no no no! It was nothing like that. I did go to this one guy's car. His name is Gilbert. We made out a little, but that was it."
"How come you stopped? Oh, Gosh! I'd have crapped my pants!"
"That was about how I felt too -- but I wanted to do something anyway. But just when it started to get interesting -- my sis called me wondering where I was."
"Oh my gosh! Did you tell her to get lost?"
"Haha! No. When I told her I was in this guy's car she freaked out! So I told him I had to go. Gilbert was probably almost thirty."
"Nuh-uh!"
"Yup!"
"And you never saw him again? Wait -- you said you met TWO guys! What about the other one?"
"He -- well, he was just a kid -- fifteen years old."
"Oh no! you didn't - "
"I never did anything with him -- though he tried to get me to. He was Gilberts little brother."
"So these two guys were brothers and both gay?"
"They weren't really brothers. They lived next door to one another. Gilbert was LIKE a brother to him -- watching out for him and protecting him. This kid -- Joey is his name -- had a dick that reached almost to his knees!"
"Geez! I've heard about those!"
"You're brother's isn't THAT much shorter than Joey's -- and it's much thicker!"
"I guess I never -- um -- what? How do you know that much about Randy -- I mean his - "
"We've -- um -- seen each other!" I said, sorry I said anything.
"But -- why I mean -- why? We never saw each other -- well, not very often. You talked about him as if you guys just -- I don't get it!"
Omigosh! Do I tell him? Maybe not now! "We -- um -- aren't too shy around the bungalow -- here -- you see and -- we've been together in the bathroom before. He of course -- well -- can't see me, but -- well -- I just never gave any thought to -- um -- seeing him naked."
"Wait a minute! That night -- a couple months ago -- he called me in the middle of the night. You were with him in his bed -- weren't you?"
"Um -- yes." I said, wishing I could crawl into a hole.
"Look, I want to thank you for taking such good care of Randy. I know he really loves you. He's told me how great you are! That night -- I was having a sleepover too. My best friend Bill was there and he was tickling me -- while I was talking to Randy. He's the only one that knows I'm gay."
"Is Bill gay?"
"I don't think so, but we have always been very close -- and touched each other all over -- a lot."
"Did you ever -- do anything with him?"
"We -- um -- jerked off sometimes."
"Each other?"
"No!"
"Wow." I said.
"He's a Mormon!"
"Oh! Aren't you a Mormon too?"
"Well -- yeah -- sort of."
"Oh -- you're just sort of Mormon."
"Well, they don't exactly approve of me being gay!"
"Look Bro, you don't need to get defensive with me. I love you!"
"Huh? How can you say that? You hardly - "
"I -- uh -- it just slipped out, Jay. I wasn't -- I mean -- it's -- well ... Actually I feel like I know you more than anyone else in the world. It slipped out, but -- it slipped out easily. I feel like that. Don't you?"
DAMN! Why did I have to ask him that?
"I -- I -- dunno. I think it's too -- um -- Geez, Mikey! I -- oh, I'm sorry -- I mean -- Mike -- is that what you like to be called? I think I heard my brother call you Mikey."
"And maybe that's why it's easier for me to -- um -- love you. It really does sound strange hearing myself even say that! But I -- I -- FEEL it, Dammit!. I already had a feel for you before you came because of your brother. Randy just worships you! And I love him, so - "
"You sure throw that word around a lot."
"What?"
"Love."
"Do I? It's how I feel. I don't feel this way about everyone. Anyway -- so it's easier for me to feel something for you -- because I feel like I already know you and of course ... there's the fact that you look an awfully lot like someone else I love dearly."
"Who?" He said then almost immediately, "Oh! Sorry, I'm a little slow tonight."
"You've been thrown a lot -- a lot of new stuff to digest." I said lamely -- actually feeling a little hurt that he didn't fee what I was feeling ... for him. "Um -- did you want to touch Bill -- when you used to wank with him?"
"No! I mean -- I dunno -- I mean -- well, maybe -- a little."
"I'll bet it was more than just a little."
"I tried not to think about it like that. I knew it was a sin." Said Jay.
"What was a sin?"
"To want to touch him." He said, then after my silent shocked expression, he said, "Don't you think so?"
"I have a hard time thinking that how I feel is sinful. I didn't choose to be gay. Actually I hated it at first ... before I really knew I was. I felt the feelings and urges and stuff, but, Jay, I really fought with it -- at first."
"Doesn't that tell you that it's wrong?"
"In the first place ... no! but this isn't about that. What I'm trying to tell you is -- I didn't choose this. I didn't even WANT it once I figured it out. I've spent the last two years in hell. I wanted to tell someone. I wanted to ASK someone things~! I wanted to die at times! I kind of just got used to it -- but still didn't tell anyone. Then I took the big risk and told my sis. GOD, I love Spike!"
"Spike? Your sister's name is spike?"
"It's a name I gave her -- `cuz she always bossed me around. But once I told her and she was -- well -- so excellent about it -- I felt much better. Now that I have a brother -- a twin brother who is also -- gay -- I feel even better about it."
"Why?" He asked. I think I gave one of those exasperated expressions. "Please don't get tired of my questions. I think I'm going through what you did a little later than you."
"I'm sorry. It's just that already I feel like you should be feeling everything exactly like I am. Anyway ... I feel better because we grew up with different parents, completely different religious background, we never knew each other or even ABOUT each other ... and yet we're both gay. What does that tell you?"
"Um -- maybe that -- we were born this way?" He said.
"Maybe."
"Do you think so?"
"I've given it a lot of thought in the last few months!" I answered. "Jay -- brother -- I remember seeing something on the net in the last couple months. They did a study of twins where one or both were gay. When one was gay, the incidence of the other was something like 55%. The religionists used that to try to prove that it's not born into us -- that if it were, then 100% should be gay, if it was genetic."
"Doesn't that kind of make sense?"
"It may if you don't think much about it, Jay. But -- even the most radical gays say that the incidence of gay men is no more than 10%."
"10%? I don't think that 10% of the guys I know are gay!" Said Jay.
"Me neither. But then those who want to minimize us, put it at one percent. So I figure it's probably somewhere in between -- maybe 5%. So ... if that's so -- or even if it WAS 10% - 55% is huge! Now I DO think there are gay guys who choose NOT to live that way -- because it is too uncomfortable or whatever. Maybe that accounts for SOME of those twins where only one is gay. Anyway -- I still wish I wasn't gay -- but now having you with me somehow makes it a lot easier!" I said.
"I don't know -- if it is a sin -- any more. I used to think so, but -- now I'm not so sure." Said my brother. "But -- maybe what I'm thinking right now could be."
"What?"
"It's not very nice -- especially since you told me that you wish you weren't gay."
"What? What were you thinking?" I asked.
"Sigh! I'm sorry Mikey, but -- I'm glad you ARE gay!"
"Oh! Heh! I was wondering if you were gonna ask me to do something -- with you."
"I wasn't. I've never done anything. I've never even held another guy. Do you think it would be okay to hold your brother?" He asked, shyly.
"I'll be truthful, Jay-Jay."
"Omigosh! That's what Randy calls me!"
"I know -- sorry, it just slipped out."
"NO! I loved it! And I know he also calls you Mikey. And you seem okay with me calling you that. But -- what were you going to say?"
"I - I -- dunno." I said.
"You were getting all `truthful' with me." He grinned this time and I had to laugh, because he looked exactly like me -- when I grin!
"Oh -- yeah. Um -- well, - I was wishing we could do a lot more than hold each other!"
"Oh! Well -- I dunno -- I um -- dunno what that would even be." He said. "What would you want to do?"
"I really want to see - - ALL of you!"
"Oh! You want to see my -- dick?" He said, again with my winning smile on his face.
"Well -- yes, but not just that. I really do want to see ALL of you. I want to inspect every nook and well -- I want to see just how alike we really are."
His grin got even wider. "Only -- only -- I get first dibs -- `cuz -- I asked first!"
"What?"
"I just want to hold you -- right now." He said, and I couldn't help aping his pouty lips. We both laughed.
"Jay-Jay -- one thing we have to remember: Your brother already is feeling left out. We need to be careful -- um -- about Randy's feelings. He really does worship his little brother."
"Oh! Yeah. I feel the same about Randy. Thanks for -- um -- caring. You must like him a lot too."
"I do."
"Um," he said, "Can we just -- um - "
"We probably need a shower first."
"Oh -- yeah. Well -- naked hugs might be fun!" he laughed.
"You've really never touched another guy?" I asked.
"Nope! Guys were off limits!"
"So ... you've touched girls?"
"Touched them? Well, not any more than to dance with one. And to kiss a little, maybe."
"I think you're gonna like naked hugs ... and ... you're gonna LOVE ... WET naked hugs! Lets go!"
I said, pulling him into the bathroom.
We both, almost in slow motion, took off our underwear. First we removed our tee shirts. We gawked at each other, because other than some small differences -- he was definitely thinner than I -- it was like seeing myself ... only better. I hoped he felt the same. His eyes told me he did, as they traveled the extents of my body, pausing at the two hairs on my chest. We both laughed, because we both had exactly two hairs on our chest. I took hold of mine and tugged heartily.
"What're you doing?" He said, seeming alarmed. I pulled them out and offering them to him. He backed away. "Why did you do that?" He said, clearly disturbed.
"Now people can tell us apart!" I said laughing.
"No way!" He said, yanking his own out -- and holding them under my nose. "I've got a twin brother and I want it to STAY that way!"
"Well, they can still tell us apart. You're so sexy with your narrow waist and wide shoulders! No one can miss this!" I said as I grabbed my excess fat on my side.
"I HATE being skinny! You look like the perfect body! I just want to - "
He reached out and squeezed the same bit of fat that I had grabbed. In reality it was barely possible to grab anything, but he did it. That produced an immediate reaction -- in both of us! We both looked down and seeing the tented underwear, we laughed again.
"Hee hee!" He laughed. "This is fun! Um -- can I take off your underwear?"
I didn't say anything but I just closed my eyes. I felt his hand first caress its way around my side to the rear elastic in them. He put his finger inside it and pulled it out and down, working his way around to the front, where he pulled it away and tried to get it over my protruding "tent pole." We laughed again as it stubbornly stayed hidden.
So he finally pushed in on it and lowered the material from it. My dick was so hard it was aching. Aching from the throbbing blood inside, but also aching for him to wrap his hand around it ... which is exactly what he did NOT do! He lowered my boxers past my knees, where they fell to the floor. Then he just stood back and admired -- no -- loved my hard lodge pole.
I stepped closer again and removed his briefs. He was a carbon copy of myself! I then captured his eyes in my own and reached out and I DID wrap my hand around his warm, throbbing bone and pulled him to me. He was already breathing raggedly, never taking his eyes from mine. "May I ... kiss you?" I asked.
This time it was he who closed his eyes. I put my lips on his and gave him a chaste, tender kiss. I let go his dick, letting it kiss my own and I lowered both my hands to his butt. He moaned, then asked, "What are we gonna do, Mikey?" He asked dreamily.
I felt his complete truest. I also was reminded of his total innocence. I simply held him and said, "We're gonna take a shower. I want to feel your body as I wash you -- would that be okay?"
"I think -- I think -- so." He said.
He was nearly in a hypnotic state, so I led him into the shower and adjusted the water the way I liked it. From experience, I knew that using my hands -- rather than a wash cloth -- was nicer. So after getting thoroughly wet, rubbed soap all over him, then pulled him close as I washed his neck, back -- everything on the back of his body.
He squirmed a little -- and giggled -- when I washed deep into his crack. I spent an extra few moments running the edge of my hand up and down his deep canyon, making sure I had constant contact with the sensitive opening to his anus. I kept eye contact to assure his it was safe and assure myself that he was okay.
Then I kissed him again, this time I opened my mouth. He kept his closed tightly. "Open your mouth, Jay-Jay." I said.
"We're not supposed to French kiss."
"You're probably not supposed to be hugging another guy in the shower either. Open your mouth."
I guess he got it, because he opened and I put my tongue in far enough to lick the end of his tongue. He stiffened, then clutched me closer. "Omigosh!" he said. I felt his boner flex and he buried his head in my neck and moaned.
"Is this okay -- with you -- Jay?" I asked.
"I -- I dunno. Right now I don't want to think about how okay it is. I just don't want it to stop!" He started whimpering a little.
"What's wrong, Jay-Jay?"
"Wrong? WRONG?!!" He exclaimed. "Never has anything felt more right! I know -- now -- that -- this is what I was created for. This is what I want!"
"Oh, I'm so glad to hear you say that!" I exuded.
I was feeling the same way. I guessed it had something to do with our connection as twins ... or something. All I know is I've never felt this way -- about anyone -- before! My whole body felt -- at the same time -- weak and strong! It was like it started from my heart and spread out through my whole being. "This HAS to be Love!" I told myself.
"I just wonder what it will feel like when I'm actually in love with a guy I'm getting this feeling from. Someday, I'll find out!" He said.
That felt like cold water was suddenly poured on my earlier warmth. He continued, "I'm not sure how much experimentation you want to do -- or what you'll be willing to show me, but -- somehow -- what seems so wrong with any other guy -- seems to be not so bad with my twin. It's almost like jacking off. I feel like I shouldn't be doing it, but I know it's no big deal. Being here with you -- doing what we're doing is like -- like -- well, doing it with my self. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah, Bro. It actually does."
Only I was seeing it a little differently.
We dried off and went to bed. What I thought would be an all night "getting to know you" marathon, ended quickly as we climbed into bed -- naked -- and he fell asleep in my arms. It wasn't long before we got a knock on our door.
Even three hours didn't seem long enough to hold my new brother ... three hours to hear him breath softy into my neck. To feel his body's every move ... to feel him woody up several times, then feel it subside. When Randy knocked, Jay woke up. He smiled at me.
"Can I come in, Mikey?" He asked.
"Sure." I said.
He opened the door and made his way toward my bed. "Isn't my brother amazing?" Said Randy, not realizing that Jay was lying partially on top of me. We both grinned. But that grin was to be premature. He continued as he sat on my bed, "I wanted to get to you early so I could ask you -- please don't mention to Jay about you and me -- what we've done. I don't think he'd under - "
"We're both here, Rand." Said Jay almost apologetically.
"Oh! Well, I guess I shouldn't be surprised."
Randy didn't have his dark glasses on, so it was easy even in the dim early morning light to see the disappointment and hurt in his eyes. Jay reached and held his brother's hand. "It's okay Rand -- all we did was sleep together -- like you and I have done thousands of times -- only -- only -- we had our jammers on.
"Oh -- slept naked, did you?" Said Randy, trying to recover. "That must have been -- nice. I've never done it -- with anyone."
I wondered what he thought I was. We had slept naked! Maybe he wasn't counting that.
"What -- erm -- I mean -- um -- what did you and my brother do?" Asked Jay.
I guessed that he was still talking to Randy, so I didn't answer. "We -- oh! I guess I WAS naked with Mike! But -- er -- um -- that is -- we did some stuff -- that -- I guess I was wondering about. Stuff that I always wanted to do -- with you, but you're my little brother, Jay!"
"I know. I guess that's what made it okay with my twin -- when it wasn't with you."
"Heh! I'm not sure the bishop would approve of what either of us did!" Said Randy.
"He doesn't even approve of masturbation!" Said Jay.
"He knows that we all do it, Jay-Jay. But as a bishop he has to discourage it. I talked to dad about that!"
"You talked to dad -- about THAT?! What did he say -- I mean -- why -- er -- um -- how did you get on the subject of jacking off?"
"I just asked him why -- in Elders Quorum -- in the Young adult Ward, why they don't talk about that. If everyone does it and everyone feels guilt about it ... can that be good?"
"What did dad say? I KNOW he didn't admit it to you ... that he does it!"
"No -- he answered with a joke, actually. I can't believe I didn't tell you. But -- it WAS after I came down here to school."
"What was the joke?"
"Okay, well this 16-year-old hick farm kid is in a personal priesthood interview with his bishop -- up in Idaho. The bishop asks him, "Joe, do you have a problem with masturbation?"
Joe answers without a second thought, "No, Bishop, I like it!"
"Oh!" Exclaimed Jay, after we all chuckled. "So all boys do it!"
"Yeah, but then Dad said, `Son, did you know that 95% of all men admit to regular masturbation?' I was blown away by that, but then he added, "the other 5 percent lie about it!' I'll tell you I had to think about that for a moment! When Dad laughed, I knew that too was a joke ... but not really."
"So what he's saying is that ... everyone does it -- even Dad ... and the bishop!"
"Sure, but dad just wanted to make the point that the bishop and other leaders don't talk about it, because they don't want boys ... and men ... to become addicted to it."
"Dang!" Said Jay.
"What?"
"I think I AM addicted to it~!"
"Well, anyway all men and boys do it and ... most brothers probably do what we did -- do it together. I liked that. Didn't you?"
"Duh~!" Said Jay. Then he looked me in the eyes, but asked Randy, "Um -- is that what you and Mike did?"
After too long a pause, and with me turning scarlet red, which by now Jay could clearly see, Randy answered, "Jay-Jay -- I can't lie to you. We did more than that. Please don't ask what. I feel guilty enough about it as it is. I don't want to explain it to my little brother. The main thing is -- I liked what we did, but I want to mainly do that kind of thing -- with a girl -- a very special girl -- someday."
"But what ... ? Oh, never mind. My brother will show me!" Said Jay.
Again I saw hurt in Randy's face. I don't know if it was because I was somehow taking Randy's place -- which I don't think I was -- or -- if it was because he knew that Jay and I would be doing more than he ever did with his little brother ... or maybe it was something else. In some ways, he was losing both Jay and me!
And I felt the loss too. I liked what I'd been doing with Randy. Now it would be weird.
"Um -- Randy?" Said Jay.
"Yeah?"
"Can we still -- um -- do you think we can still -- um - "
"Jack off together?" He said.
"Um -- yeah!" Said Jay.
I saw Randy's face brighten. I wondered if he knew that we could see his face so clearly. "I -- guess."
"Can we do it -- here -- now?"
"What -- with Mike here?" He said.
"Well -- maybe Mike would like to -- um -- do it WITH us."
I felt a bolt of electricity race through me and end up in my balls!
"I dunno, Jay -- what do you think, Mikey?"
"Randy -- Jay -- I'd feel so good to be included in your special moment."
It was Randy who thought about getting up and closing the door. He came and lay next to his brother. He had put some boxers on before he came to my room, but he shed them as he lay next to us. I was on Jay's other side. All of our boners were flying high already, so without a word, we just started to jerk them.
Both Randy and Jay's eyes were closed, but not mine! I didn't want to miss this, and then it hit me:
I reached over and put Jay's hand on Randy's and Randy's hand on Jays. Randy's non-sighted eyes popped open and Jay looked over at me questioningly. I put my hand over his and started him jerking his brother. Randy immediately joined in and they were happily touching each other for the very first time. It wasn't long before I was caught up in their joy as one by one -- starting with Jay and ending with me ... we all blew cum all over my sheets, ourselves and they on each other.
When we were done, Jay climbed on top of his brother and hugged him close. I felt a little out in the cold, but it still felt good.
Notes: Don't you love it when families get along? Comments are always welcome -- even solicited! (Hey I'm as much as an attention whore as the next guy! Address them to Steve at stevethomas535@hotmail.com. Thanks and ... love, Steve