CHAPTER 22 -
Nick went on talking since Brian gave him an empty look.
"Its just about what we were talking right now. About finding this person with whom you can forget about the world, this person that will make everything else fade when they are with you... I always thought I'd never find this person, but now... whenever I think of someone I would like to spend the rest of my life with, to share everything with, to give my all to... Whenever I think of a person to fulfill the dream of loving helplessly without fearing anything..." - Nick stopped and sighed.
Brian was looking carefully at him, waiting for Nick to go on. But right now he was scared... he had been so right about what he wanted to say... What if he was wrong? What if Brian didn't feel the same...? Nick fought against the knot in his throat to go on.
"I can only think of you." - Nick said sheepishly.
"Me...?" - Brian asked staring at him.
"Yes... I think... after all those years I think I've only loved one person in my life. I don't love you because you were the one to save me, not because you were always my best friend and were always there for me. I love you just because I can't live without you."
Nick wasn't crying, but the words were coming slowly as he was looking at his hands.
"I... I hear your voice Brian and it gets through to me. I look into your eyes and its like I've known you forever, its something I can't help... I know how hard it is to accept I fell in love with a guy... But I think over and over and my heart is saying he doesn't care what you are, but who you are. And I can't help loving you... I've already cried so much, suffered so much... I'm just afraid to lose you by saying this..." - Nick finished finally looking at Brian.
"You will never lose me..." - It was all Brian could say.
For minutes they said nothing, only looked at each other.
"What if..." - Nick began - "What if that person you were looking for... what if it is me?"
Nick was waiting but Brian only looked at him.
"Brian... say something, please!"
"Its just... everything is falling into place now." - Brian took Nick's hand. - "I love you but I'm scared of loving you! I mean... I've always loved you, but now I think I've always been in love too... Its something hard to figure out but if tomorrow when I wake up I realize you aren't in this world I wouldn't want to live... Now I understand why I can't be happy if I'm not close to you... I love you from the bottom of my heart and it scares the hell out of me, Nick!" - Brian exclaimed and they laughed.
"Once my grandpa told me something, Brian... about finding the one. I remember I asked him how could I be sure if the person I was with was my soul mate... He said that to find my soul mate wouldn't be difficult at all. But to be with them. To fight everything and everyone for this love would be the hardest thing ever, and almost everyone gives up. I know you are this person Brian, I don't wanna give you up..."
Brian took a deep breath before leaning over and kissing Nick's lips. They only brushed their lips together for some moments, and when they pulled apart Brian had tears in his eyes.
"Nick... what do you do when everything you judged to be right turns out to be wrong, and everything you condemned to be wrong can feel so right...?"
Nick smiled and took Brian's face between his hands.
"Ninety per cent of the people in this world is unhappy in their love life. Most people will never find their soul mate or if they do they won't fight for it. More people break up than fall in love. What to do when it's this amount of people that defines what is wrong or right? I say you should follow your heart because it'll always know whats better for you..."
Brian looked at him.
"And people say you are dumb?!"
Nick laughed and so did he.
"Apparently." - he answered.
"That was the most intelligent thing I've ever heard!" - Brian gave him a large smile.
"Oh, well..." - Nick blushed and Brian laughed.
"Oh, my God! I love you, Nick! I love you and I don't care about anything else! I don't care about what people will say, if they had a true love they wouldn't be wasting their time judging other people, and I'm not gonna let it go, I can't! This would kill me! I love you and I wanna spend the rest of my life with you!" - Brian was almost screaming. - "I'm fucking scared with what I'm saying but its all true!"
Nick laughed.
"I mean it! I can't see the world I'm walking through, I don't know where I'm getting myself into, but I don't care! They say love is blind, don't they? Oh, well... I can't help it! I told you finding that person was the most important thing in my life and I know its you, Nick, and I'm never gonna let it go... You are the meaning of my life! And oh, my God! I understand everything I had been feeling and I'm so amazed, so surprised and so happy I can't even move!"
"C'mon, Brian..." - Nick smiled looking at the eyes he could get lost into.
Brian placed his hand on Nick's face.
"I'm serious, Nick... I touch you and my heart races... Is this love? I wanna know everything about you, I want to tell you my secrets, I wanna know what you are feeling... I wanna hear about your fears, the things that hurt you and the ones that give you pleasure... I just wanna be with you all the time I don't wanna miss on a single breath you take because when you went on coma I could feel how short life really is. You never know what is gonna happen... You never know if you will have another chance to tell the person how much you loved them..."
Nick waited almost a minute before saying something, and when he did his hand was softly caressing Brian's face.
"Ya know... when I saw Taison in my room, waiting for me I didn't feel scared. He did a little acting before we started to fight and still I wasn't scared. But when I saw him pointing a gun at me... It was the most scary moment of my life. Not because I could die, it wasn't only that! Brian... that day was when I realized I not only loved you but was in love with you too! And Taison holding that gun ready to shoot me... I could only think: What if I'm never gonna be able to tell Brian how I feel? What if I die here and now and Brian will never know how deep was my love?... That was what scared me the most."
"That day you realized you loved me?"
"Yeah, I was all day long with those butterflies inside of me!"
Brian giggled.
"Nick, I don't know more what to say, I mean, everything's been said!" - Brian smiled.
"I know, I know... It might sound weird but I'm also scared." - Nick laughed. It was Brian! It was Frick! They could tell each other they were scared. - "This should be the time when no words are used..." - Nick grinned and so did Brian. - "But I'm still pretty much in shock... our love is just flooding me!"
"... our love..." - Brian repeated. They remained silent.
Nick stared at Brian. He knew he needed nothing more in his life than waking up everyday and seeing that face. And being with the only person capable of understanding his soul, and the one his heart belonged to. Soon, looking at those blue eyes that mirrored his own, the fear began to leave filling their hearts with love. Love and need. Need to be with each other, to touch, to belong to...
"I love you..." - Nick whispered.
Immediately Brian's arms closed around him and their mouths joined together into a passionate kiss. It was innocent because true love is innocent. But still it was different from what happened in the country house. Back then they weren't aware of their feelings, back there it was just a love so strong and complete for them to understand.
But now... here... Things couldn't be more clear.
Nick explored Brian's mouth with his tongue and Brian did the same, welcoming Nick's soft tongue and licking it slowly. The wonderful taste of love was flooding their bodies. Neither of them knew how much they missed that since the last time they had been this close. And differently than in the country house this time they knew it wouldn't have an end.
The pure love, the true one only happens once in life. 'If it wasn't forever then it wasn't love...' And this would be forever.
They broke the kiss and no more fear grew between them. It was just right. Just perfect. They belonged together and whenever they felt scared they would always have a warm touch from the other, and safe arms to fall into.
Brian and Nick played with their fingers joined together.
"Nick, we didn't realize it, but the sun is already setting... We've been talking for hours..."
"Wanna go inside?" - Nick asked.
"Yes."
The two guys stood up and with linked fingers they headed to Nick's room.
Brian laid in the bed with Nick beside him. Their hands were still joined together as they stared at the ceiling for a brief moment. Soon they turned to face each other and smiled. They laughed and smiled again. It was so amazing this feeling of having found the person you'll be with for the rest of your life!
"God, you are beautiful..." - Brian said serious and Nick immediately leaned over to kiss him.
Brian took his hand to the back of his neck pulling him close and Nick allowed his arms to tighten around Brian's waist, making it easier to push his tongue inside his mouth, to taste Brian, to taste love and life in one simple kiss.
Brian was now licking Nick's lips and nibbling on them at the same time. Whole minutes passed by only with them kissing softly sometimes and with passion some others.
"I love you." - Brian said.
"I know."
They smiled.
Nick cuddled to Brian's body and they held each other as if they were holding on to life, which wasn't at all far from the truth.
"It feels so right... I wanna be like this forever." - Nick said as Brian ran his hands through his hair.
He couldn't remember how many times they had been like that, Nick cuddled to his chest and Brian running his fingers through his soft hair, caressing his face, comforting him... How didn't he realize it was love? It was so obvious now...
Nick kissed Brian's chest through his shirt and made a path up to kiss and nibble on his neck. Brian giggled.
"Hey, its tickling me!" - Brian kind of laughed.
Nick looked at him and laughed. Deep inside they would always be children. What could it be? Love has this power... when we find and bring it to our lives we will always be kids. Even to the most intimate moments, the heated ones, the erotic ones... They were all a part of a sweet thing called love, it was in the heart and mind, but it couldn't be without the touch.
Nick ran his hand over Brian's chest and he kissed Nick's forehead. They were pretty lost about what to do. They loved each other so much and needed each other so desperately... But strangely they had no rush. They felt as if they could spent the rest of their lives softly touching each other, with cute little caresses and kisses.
The colored sky from a beautiful sunset was gone now to be replaced by the dark blue night with its little stars and a moon shining bright. But nothing of this could be seen by those boys. Brian and Nick had been all this time laid in that bed. Hours doing nothing but kissing, caressing, touching and just enjoying the warmth of their love.
Nick was loving to rest his head on Brian's chest and hear his heart beating. Sometimes out of nowhere one would begin to laugh, and now it was Nick's turn.
"What?" - Brian asked smiling.
Nick burst out laughing coming even close - if possible - to Brian's body.
"I just never thought something like this could happen! I mean... I love you so much that I can't stop smiling!"
Brian sat and kissed Nick.
"Aw... you are so cute!" - Brian said.
"You are!"
"We are!"
Nick kissed him.
"But if you still want me to be cute I gotta take a shower now! I just missed track of time... See?! Your fault!" - Brian pointed at Nick standing up from the first time in three hours.
"My fault? I can't help you smell so good."
Brian looked into his eyes. No one could tell which pair of blue eyes was shining the most.
"I love you, Nick and I just can't get enough of saying it..."
Nick put himself on his knees on the bed and came close to Brian to lock his arms around his waist as he stood up in front of him.
"Go take a shower and I'll try to come up with something from my messy kitchen for us to eat." - Nick grinned looking up at Brian's face.
"What? You gonna cook?!"
"You wish! You better pray to God we have something like chocolate or those pizzas to put in the microwave!"
Both Brian and Nick laughed.
"I don't know, Nick, get us something we can eat in the bed. I just wanna go back in cuddling you after I leave the shower."
Nick smiled. Was this true? Since when did heaven move down to Earth?
"Ok, I already miss you, love..."
Brian kissed his lips and nibbled softly on them before Nick let go of this embrace and Brian went to the bathroom, Nick going to the kitchen.
'I called Brian love...' - Nick thought. 'Oh, man! My life is perfect...' - Nick sighed.
Half an hour later Brian and Nick were back to lie on the bed after having eaten some cookies Nick happily came across in the kitchen.
They were both sat on the bed, really close to each other and still overwhelmed with the feeling shared between them.
Nick looked at Brian.
"Why you grinning, Bri?" - he asked.
"I don't know..." - Brian sighed and let his body fall slowly into the sheets, resting his head on Nick's lap. In one second Nick had his hand caressing Brian's hair.
Brian took Nick's hand and kissed his fingers.
When Brian looked up Nick was frowning and biting on his lower lip.
"What?" - Brian asked.
"I was just thinking how much I wanted to kiss you..."
Nick also got himself into the sheets and on top of Brian as he kissed him passionately. Slowly their kiss got sweet as Nick traced Brian's lips with his tongue, placing several soft kisses on his cheek.
Brian sighed and tightened his arms around Nick having their bodies pressed up together. Nick moved on top of him kissing Brian at the same time before pulling apart and looking him in the eyes, their faces still very close.
"Do you want to get undressed?" - Nick asked seriously.
Brian couldn't help but laughing.
"What?" - Nick asked by this time laughing too.
"Its just that you blushed a deep crimson when you asked that." - Brian smiled at him.
"Oh, well..." - Nick grinned rolling his eyes.
"Come here."
Brian pulled Nick's head to meet his lips, to capture his mouth in his on and kiss him deeply.
Nick buried his head on Brian's neck to kiss him and at the same time he ran his hands over the skin of Brian's chest under his shirt. That simple touch was sending shivers through their bodies.
With Brian's help Nick took off his shirt and soon Brian did the same to him. They could no longer keep it, their passion was too strong now, they had to be the closest possible.
With their mouths always kissing Brian slowly managed to take off the rest of cloth they had in. They couldn't actually see each other's bodies once they were under the sheets, but they could feel it.
Nick was totally into kissing Brian and exploring his mouth when he felt Brian's hands softly pull his hips closer, pressing them up to move together.
"Hm..." - Brian moaned into his mouth.
Realizing what they were doing Nick began to move faster, this time causing himself to moan too.
They were both hard and totally depending on that friction movements to be close to the other, to feel everything, to taste everything.
"God... I love you, Brian..." - Nick gasped with the pleasure from their bodies moving together. He looked at Brian's beautiful flushed face.
"I love you..." - Brian said tightening his hands around Nick's back. - "I love you so much..."
"Oh, God, Brian!" - Nick whimpered as they were moving faster.
Brian was breathless, moaning and whining at the same time.
With such strong need it didn't took much until they reached their orgasms at the same time.
Nick took several deep breaths before lying his head on Brian's chest.
"God, Nick..." - Brian babbled taking Nick's head between his head and kissing him softly.
Quickly they were cuddled again. They were love was real now.
It didn't matter what they would do next in this new and wonderful life. Some of the things could be difficult for both Nick and Brian. Probably they would take years until they were finally able to give themselves completely to each other, and this was wonderful because that was exactly what they wanted. Why rush when they had all this time in this word to love?
They would have to go through many things, not only with the world out of their own but with their love too. Neither of them was ready to something really intense like making love or giving in completely to this feeling they shared. They knew this would come with time, right now nothing could be more important than being with each other.
Nick was feeling sleepy as Brian caressed his hair and neck. He just didn't want to sleep, he wanted the happiest day of his life to last as much as possible.
Nick smiled. He knew much, much more was to come. Slowly he looked up at Brian and smiled.
"I'm trying to be awake but I can't..." - Nick babbled.
"Why don't you sleep? I love to watch you, you look just like an angel..."
Nick kissed Brian's naked stomach.
"I love you." - Brian said never letting go of smoothing Nick's hair and neck.
Again he kissed Brian's chest softly before resting his head there again.
"I love you too..." - Nick said bringing his hand to his chest and touching him, caressing him.
Nick closed his eyes and Brian smiled at the blond head lying on his chest with one hand softly touching him.
"You promise you will be here with me when I wake up?" - Nick whispered without opening his sleepy eyes.
"Yes... I will always be here." - Brian played with Nick's hair. He was probably asleep by now. - "And when you wake up we will continue to dream together, Nick..."
THE END
Did you like the story? Please drop me a line, i'd love to know!
Lionessy@hotmail.com
By the way, if you want more Brian n Nick loving, I'm writing another story in Nifty, called Where Can We Go From Here.