I Need Love

By moc.loa@13731sirhC

Published on Jul 18, 2000

Gay

I just wanted to say thanks for the positive feedback. I've gotten so many good responses and I've tried to reply to each person, but if I missed you, sorry, and thanks!!! Thanks for all the support everyone!!! It's good to know other people appreciate what I love doing. Same stuff, if you're not 18, leave. This isn't meant to imply anything about the true sexualities of any member of *NSYNC, blah blah blah.

I Need Love: Chapter II

I was awakened by the soft beep of machinery. That really confused me. Why would there be machines in Heaven, or Hell if that's where I ended up for eternity? I slowly opened my eyes to an almost pure room with a bright light on the ceiling. Rubbing my eyes to clear my vision, I found the IV needle in the back of my hand. Shit, I thought, realizing what really had happened. Someone had found me.

I scanned the room and I found two sleeping figures in chairs near the window. They were both wearing baseball caps and had their heads down so I couldn't tell who they were. It's weird that anyone's here at all, I don't really know anyone in the city that well. As I sat there trying to figure out who could have possibly found me to call an ambulance, the guy on the right stirred.

He lifted his head and I found myself looking into the bloodshot eyes of JC Chasez. How could he possibly have found me? He doesn't know where I live! He doesn't even know my phone number!

"Uhm, hi......." I started. I really didn't know what to say. I was kind of embarassed. It's not everyday you wake up to a pop star after a suicide attempt.

"Why, Chris? Why would you do something like that?" JC said emotionally.

Wow. I haven't even known him for a day and he actually cares. Someone who cares. How long has it been since I've had someone like that? I didn't think there was anyone out there. That's why I did what I did.........

"Bryan.......he...he said that he couldn't be friends with me anymore......." The last few words were hard to get out as I started getting more and more choked up by oncoming tears. JC got up from across the room and came to the side of my hospital bed. He grabbed my hand and held it tight.

"Chris, I want you to understand one thing: NO ONE is that important. You are worth so much more than that. You ARE important. If not to anyone else, then definitely to me."

"I'm.....I'm important to you?" I sniffled out.

"Absolutely. I wouldn't be here if you weren't. You're important to Lance, too, right Scoop?" JC said over his shoulder. The other person by the door looked up and just nodded as he stretched and yawned. After he was done I could see that it was in fact Lance Bass. He walked over to where we were.

"There's always other options, Chris." he said, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. "You should've called us. We would've helped you work things out."

"I'm sorry. I

"I'm still a little queazy. Uhm, how'd you guys find me, by the way?"

"We didn't, really," JC explained. "Your neighbor came over to borrow a cup of milk. When she knocked, the door pushed open. You had left it slightly open. She found you on the floor in the kitchen and called 911."

"Then how did you find out?" I asked.

"My cell phone number was in your pocket. They called me at 3 o'clock yesterday afternoon and Scoop and I have been here ever since."

"Yesterday? What day is it? What time is it?" I said.

Lance checked his watch and yawned again. "It's about 11:30 on, uhm, Saturday."

Huh. I'd been there two days. And JC and Lance had been here for almost 33 hours. Man, I'd feel special if it wasn't such a depressing reason for them to be there for me.

"You guys can go back to your hotel. I'll be fine. Thanks for coming up. Besides, you need showers, you smell!" I said, crinkling my nose.

"Sorry, no can do, buddy boy," Lance said with a small smile. "We don't leave until you do."

"What do you mean? I'll be fine on my own. You guys probably need to get back to the band anyway."

"Actually, you won't be fine on your own. The doctors don't think so, and we don't either. We told them we'd take care of you, so that's what we're gonna do," JC said.

"Don't you guys have to leave soon? Aren't you on tour?" I said confused. How could they take care of me for more than a few days if they were leaving town?

"That's what we need to talk to you about. You see, you're coming with us," JC said half-questioningly.

My jaw just about hit the floor. JC was practically telling me that I HAD to go with *NSYNC on their tour!! What a dream come true!!

"How? I mean, I'm assuming you just can't invite friends to travel around with you any time you want."

"Well, actually," Lance said, "you're gonna be working for me and my new production company. You'll be my personal assistant. So you'll still have a job and you'll be with us so we can keep an eye on you."

That last comment kinda made me feel like a child, but frankly, I really didn't care! I was gonna be spending 24 hours a day on the road with *NSYNC!!

"Well, if you guys think that that's what you need to do, I guess it's OK with me." I said with a smile.

JC and Lance grinned from ear to ear. Then they heard the door open and they turned their heads to see who it was. A doctor in a long white lab coat with a stethoscope around his neck walked in carrying a clipboard.

"Ah, finally awake. My name's Dr. Ross. How are we feeling, Mr. Johnson?" he said, checking the monitors of my vital signs.

"I guess I'm as well as can be expected. I feel kind of sore and weak." I said, trying not to sound too pitiful. Truth was, I felt like someone ran over me with a truck of elephants, but I wanted out of here.

"That's normal after you've had your stomach pumped. Maybe you should think twice about having 5 bottles of pills and a bottle of tequila for dinner next time?" he said, trying to lighten the mood. "Now seriously, I don't know what's going on in your life right now, but suicide is NEVER an option. There are places that can help you. There's always someplace or somebody to turn to. Now your cousin here," he gestured towards JC, " says he'll take care of you and make sure nothing happens to you. I trust him, so I'm gonna release you into his custody. Just try to talk to someone, it'll help a lot, I promise. Alright? Now you just need some rest to help your body heal, so go home and sleep it off." Dr. Ross finished writing on the chart and looked over at me and the other two guys.

I could only nod slowly. If I opened my mouth, I think I would just bust up laughing. As the doctor said good-bye and good luck and left, I start trembling from holding in the laughter. That didn't last for long, I just started giggling hysterically.

"You told them you were my cousin? And they ACTUALLY believed you, no checking or anything? You don't even look like me!!" I said to JC.

"What? You think they were just gonna turn you over to a complete stranger saying they were your friend?" He said, this adorably innocent look on his face. "I didn't lie, I just fibbed a little!"

"You are such a big fat liar, boy," I said as I got up from my bed and located my clothes. I picked them up and just stood there staring at the two other guys for a little while. Obviously, they weren't picking up the hint. "Uh, you just gonna stand there and watch me dress?"

Lance came over smiling and pinched me on the cheek saying, "Actually we were gonna help you, we ARE supposed to be taking care of you, Chrissy!"

Oddly, JC just blushed crimson and hurried towards the door. What was that about? Maybe I'll ask him later, I thought. I quickly got dressed and slowly made my way to the door. I was still feeling a little sick and dizzy. It was a little hard to walk in a straight line. I opened the door and almost fell right into Lance and JC. They caught me and held me up as I regained my balance.

"Let's go!" I said, eager to get out of there.

"Slow down, man. You're not really in peak physical condition right now," Lance said.

I kind of half stumbled through the halls with each hand on JC's and Lance's shoulders. Finally we made it to the front entrance onto the busy New York Streets. I stayed by the doors leaning on Lance's shoulder while JC tried valiantly to hail a cab. The poor boy would never make it living in New York. It WAS humorous to see him flailing his arms around out on the curb, though.

"You know, you really scared us. I thought JC was gonna explode he was so worried about you," Lance casually remarked as I snickered at the dark-haired guy.

"Oh really? I wonder why that is. He hasn't known me very long at all," I said half-heartedly. I wasn't really paying attention now, I was focusing on JC. Why HAD he been so worried?

"Are you listening?" Lance asked. Damn, I must have been thinking about JC and not paying attention to what Lance was saying.

"I'm sorry, what'd you say? I'm still kind of spaced out from the drugs," I lied.

He sighed, "I said I think it might be because he was the last person you really talked to and he felt kind of guilty that he couldn't help you."

"Yeah, that's probably it," I said resignedly. That had to be it. It couldn't be anything more, just a little guilt. Could it? What am I talking about? That boy is straight as the day is long.

Finally JC got a cab and we all got in. The cabbie was kinda scary looking so no one really wanted to sit in front and we all squished in back, me in the middle. Bad idea. I felt like I might throw up at any minute. I moaned and groaned with each turn we made.

"Oh come on, you can't feel THAT bad," JC smirked. "Be a man."

In response, I groaned loudly as we went around a sharp curve and leaned my head on his shoulder. Looking up, I gave him my best puppy dog eyes and a sheepish smile.

"Oh, please!" he said, but he didn't move or push my head off, so I left it there. It felt nice. I missed having someone that I can lean on for support, physically and metaphorically both.

We finally stopped at the hotel and the two guys helped me out and through the lobby into the elevator. We got off on their floor, clearing everything up with the body guard at the door that I'd be traveling with them for a while. Going into JC and Lance's room, they instructed me to lay down in JC's bed.

"Just get some rest and we can go get your stuff from your apartment whenever you wake up," the older boy said.

"But where are you gonna sleep?" I said, a bit confused. Was I going to be SHARING a bed with him?!?!?!

"Don't worry about it now. Lance and I have some things to do before we go to sleep, anyway. Good night."

Lance said good night and headed out the door. JC was on his way out, too, when I called his name. He came back over to my bedside.

"Uhm, thanks a lot. For everything you've done," I said, making eye contact with him for a few seconds, but it felt like eternity.

"No problem, man. Just don't pull anymore stunts like that. I'm not sure my poor heart can take it!" He said, smiling. He reached down and pulled me into a hug, whispering into my ear, "Some people really do care, I promise."

He said goodnight and left. I lay there with a single tear running down my face. It wasn't exactly of sadness, but it wasn't exactly joy either. It was just an emotional moment. I could tell that this was a turning point in my life, and I wasn't sure what was gonna come next.


Well, that's the end of Chapter 2. I hope you guys like it as much as the first part. Send all comments to Chris13731@aol.com Thanks a lot!!!

Next: Chapter 3


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