Warnings and Disclaimers:
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If reading this is in any way illegal in your town, state or zip code because of your age, religion, or other government rules you shouldn't read this.
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If you don't want to read about male/male gay sexual relationships, go away. You shouldn't waste your time with this story.
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I don't know any of the members of 'N Sync, or any other celebrities that may be mentioned in this story. This story in no way is meant to imply anything about 'N Sync, and any other celebrities sexualities, personalities, or anything else. This is a work of pure fiction.
Questions and commentary can be sent to "jtpoole9@cybersouth.com". I want to hear from everyone out there that is reading this story, tell me what you think whether it is bad or good.
====================================== If I Ain't Got You -- Chapter 11 by JT Poole
// Orlando, FL -- Florida Hospital -- Recreation Room -- Monday Evening //
"How you feeling Justin?" JT asked, walking into the room with Steve and Kasai following him. "Ready to get started?"
"I guess I am." Justin spoke, wheeling over to JT and Steve. "What are we going to do?"
"Well first we are just going to do some stretching." JT spoke, walking over to where there were some mats laid out on the floor. "Come on over Justin."
"Aye Aye captain." Justin spoke wheeling over to the spot where JT had sat.
"Don't forget to put your brakes on." JT spoke, laying his crutches on the floor.
--- Justin's POV ---
As we sat there on the floor doing stretches, I kept thinking about how I so wanted to be like JT. Like damn, he had it all. He has a man that loves him regardless if he's able to walk or not and he's got a wonderful kid. That's what I want, I want a lover for life, I want a kid like JT has that loves me regardless. I want to love someone. I always thought that me and Josh would be together forever with kids, but he fucked that all up. There' s someone for me, but where.
"Yo earth to Justin." JT spoke tapping me on the arm. "Are you okay man?"
"Yeah, I was just thinking about something." I tell him as he grabs my left leg, bending it in and out.
"I don't want you phasing out on me man. Talk to me here." He said, as his kid Kasai grabbed my other leg, doing the same thing JT was doing. "Are you feeling anything when we do this?"
"Not much, but I know you guys are touching me." I tell him laughing.
"Well yeah we are touching you, we are flexing your legs." He told me laughing too. "What's on your mind Justin?"
"A whole lot of stuff. So much stuff swarming around up there." I tell him as I look over and see Kasai staring at me with a dreamy look in his eyes.
"What kind of stuff Justin?" he asked, massaging Justin's leg.
"Just stuff." I tell him as Kasai started doing the same thing to my other leg.
"Okay." He spoke, waving in Steve's direction. "How are you doing with getting in and out of the bathroom?"
"Okay I guess. I can use the bathroom if that's what you're asking." I tell him, looking at him strangely as Mark, his lover walk into the room.
"Is he putting you through the ringer yet Justin?" Mark asks, sitting down next to JT, kissing him on the cheek
"No not yet, but I feel one coming." I tell him as all of them start laughing.
"I am taking it easy on him tonight honey, I will let him know when I get ready to work him like a mule." JT spoke, causing me to frown as the others laughed.
--- Kasai's POV ---
Oh my God I don't believe it, I am touching Justin Timberlake's body. I know I shouldn't be thinking about him like this, but he is so sexy. I wish Daddy J wasn't here with us; I just want to wrap my arms around him and love him. I wish we were alone; I would let him take me like Jeff did recently. I bet sex with Justin would be fantastic.
"Kasai. Kasai are you okay son?" Daddy J asked me, shaking me out of my reverie.
"Daddy J I'm okay, I was just thinking about some things." I tell him.
"What is this, the zone out hour?" Daddy J spoke, shaking his head, helping Justin back up into his chair.
"Okay Justin, how do you feel?" Daddy J asks him, rubbing his legs.
"I am tired. Do we have to do this everyday?" Justin asked him.
"Just about, I think I might let you rest on the weekends if you behave yourself." Daddy J tell him just as his cell phone rings. "Hello?"
"Hi JT, Angie here." Angela spoke.
"Hi Angie, what's up?" JT asked.
"Nothing really, I am getting ready to go for the night. I will catch you and the family later on." Angela spoke.
"Okay that's cool girl. I am still working with Justin so we will be here for a bit longer. Are you going to dinner with us?" JT asked, grabbing Mark's arm and pulling himself up.
"No I have plans with someone else for tonight, I might catch you guys tomorrow night." Angela spoke.
"Alright Angie, maybe tomorrow then." JT spoke.
"Maybe. I'll let you know. Night JT." Angela spoke.
"Night Angela." JT spoke, closing his phone.
// The Hospital Lobby - A Little After 7 //
"I'm glad you decided to go out with me." Kevin spoke, reaching for Angela' s hand. "I would like to take you some place fancy, but I don't think you would want to go in your nurse's uniform."
"Some place fancy, hmmm, let's see, my house is only two miles away from here. I can go home and change and come back." Angela spoke, picking up her coat.
"Is that going to be too much trouble?" Angela asked.
"No not at all." Kevin spoke, checking his watch. "Or I can follow you to your place, wait for you and we can go on to the restaurant."
"Okay that's doable." Angela spoke, picking up her keys and bag as she and Kevin walked towards the door. "My car is in the Employee Parking area, I will wait at the stop sign for you."
"Alright." Kevin spoke as JC walked through the door.
"Hi Kevin, what are you doing here handsome." JC spoke, stopping in front of Kevin as Angela kept walking.
"I was here to see someone." Kevin spoke, trying to get away from JC.
"What's the big hurry handsome? It's been a while since I have seen you." JC spoke, grabbing Kevin by the waist and pulling him close, planting a kiss on his lips.
"No Josh, stop. I am not going to let you do this to me again." Kevin spoke, pushing JC away, just as Angela was standing there looking at the two of them. "Angela, ahhhhh..."
"What's going on Kevin?" Angela spoke with a hurt look on her face.
"It's not what it seems." Kevin spoke, as JC tried to grab his hand again.
"What does it not seem like Kevin?" Angela asked.
"Angela I can explain." Kevin spoke as Angela turned and started walking towards the door. "Wait, please let me explain."
"What is there to explain Kevin, that's your business." Angela spoke. "Looks like you and he are an item."
"No we are not. It's not what you think." Kevin spoke.
"I'm waiting for you to explain to me what it is that I think." Angela spoke now with sarcasm dripping from each one of her words. "I'm waiting, well... Why did you kiss him?"
"He kissed me." Kevin spoke, standing in front of Angela now. "I wasn't kissing him, I wouldn't..."
"You wouldn't what Kevin?" Angela asked. "Make a date with me and then turn around and then kiss this guy here, in fact the same guy I saw in the ER earlier today. I should have figured, you celeb types are all the same."
"No were are not Angela, please give me a chance here." Kevin spoke.
"A chance to what Kevin, lead me on?" Angela asked, with a sad look on her face. "I'm outta here."
"Good riddance." JC spoke, walking up to Kevin. "Come on handsome, why don 't we go to my place and do the horizontal mambo like we used to."
"Get the hell away from me Josh!" Kevin screamed, running out the door towards the parking garage. "Angela! Angela wait! Please don't leave."
"I'm going home, I've had a long day. I don't need this right now." Angela spoke.
"Please Angela, don't go." Kevin spoke.
"I'm going home." Angela spoke.
"Well fine, let me come with you." Kevin spoke, as Angela pushed the button on her door panel and the passenger side door unlocked.
"Get in before I change my mind." Angela spoke, watching Kevin walk around the car and get into the passenger side.
// In The Hospital -- The Veranda //
"Nick what are you doing out here?" Aaron asked, walking up behind his brother.
"I don't know, I just had this odd feeling that I needed to come out here." Nick spoke, rubbing at his eyes. "I want to be alone A."
"I am not going to leave you out here alone." Aaron spoke, walking up to Nick.
"There's no reason for you to stay here. Just go away, I want to be by myself." Nick spoke.
"Is it me Nick?" Aaron asked, looking at Nick. "You don't want me around you?"
"It has nothing to do with you, I just want to be left alone." Nick spoke, walking over to the other railing. "Is that too much to ask for?"
"No, I guess not." Aaron spoke, turning and walking away from Nick, stopping to look back at his brother.
"God here I am again. My life is at a stand still. Where do I go from here?" Nick spoke, rubbing his eyes more as the tears came this time. "He hurt me, he hurt me. He doesn't love me if he could do something like that to me. Love isn't supposed to hurt."
Getting up, Nick walked further into the Veranda, looking out of the windows, watching his reflection as his tears fell from his eyes, staining his hospital gown.
"God help me out here. The very thing that I want, I can't get. Why God why?" Nick asked, walking over to the door that leads to the outside. "God when are you going to send a man to love me, that won't hurt me, a man to love me for me."
"Are you expecting an answer?" Nick heard someone say as he turned around to see Justin there in the room.
"Ju...Justin, what are you doing here?" Nick asked, walking over to where Justin was. "Why are you sitting in a wheelchair?"
"I was in an accident Nick." Justin spoke, motioning for Nick to sit down.
"An accident, oh damn. What happened Justin?" Nick asked, sitting in the chair in front of Justin.
"Well the short and sweet version is that I was trying to get away from someone, I was upset and wasn't paying attention while driving and a collided with a truck. I lost consciousness and when I woke up I was told that I wouldn't be able to walk again." Justin explained.
"Oh my God Justin, I'm so sorry." Nick stated, leaning over to hug Justin.
"Well it's my own fault, I should have been paying attention to what was going on around me instead of letting my anger over Josh push me to run away like I did." Justin spoke, covering his mouth as he realized what he said.
"What do you mean Justin? Why were you running away from Josh?" Nick asked.
"He did something to hurt me. I couldn't stand being around him anymore." Justin spoke.
"What did Josh do to you Justin?" Nick asked, looking at Justin strangely.
"He lied to me, betrayed my trust in him. He hurt my feelings." Justin spoke, tears welling up in his eyes.
"I'm sorry Justin, I didn't mind to bring this up." Nick spoke, grabbing Justin's h and. "I shouldn't have asked that."
"It's okay Nick, I will have to deal with it again any way." Justin spoke. "I have to deal with my problems first hand or I will let them destroy me."
"Destroy you how Justin?" Nick asked, rubbing his hand now.
"Josh lied to me, he cheated on me with other men and some women." Justin spoke, crying now. "I loved him and he threw our love away."
"Oh Justin, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that he didn't love you enough to cherish you." Nick stated, holding Justin's hand to his chest. "If you were my boyfriend, I would cherish you Justin, I would show you the love you deserve."
"Nick..." Justin stuttered out as Nick pulled his chair closer to Justin.
"Don't cry Justin. I know things are not going great for you, but they are not going great for me either." Nick spoke, tears falling from his eyes too.
"That was so sweet." Justin spoke, wiping at his eyes. "Nick?"
"Yes Justin?" Nick answered him.
"Why are you here in the hospital?" Justin asked, looking up into Nick's eyes.
"I am not happy Justin. I am alone and I don't want to live." Nick spoke, gasping, taking in a big breath. "I have been unhappy for a long time and so far, things in my life are depressing me."
"Why aren't you happy Nick? Why don't you want to live?" Justin asked.
"Justin I have so much love to give, but no one wants my love. Every time I give my love to someone, that someone pushes my love away." Nick spoke, still crying.
"Shhhh Nick, it's going to be okay. I know how you feel." Justin spoke, rubbing Nick's hand in his. "Nick it's going to be okay."
"It won't be okay. I will always be alone." Nick stated, pulling away from Justin and walking back towards the windows.
"Yes it will Nick. Rather you know it or not, the answer to your problems are right under your nose and you don't even know it." Justin spoke, moving up behind Nick.
"Yeah right Justin, I don't have any answers to my problems. I have too many of them." Nick spoke, still staring out the window. "I am fat and ugly, my appearance is revolting. A man looks at me and runs in the other direction."
"That's not true Nick. That's not true at all." Justin spoke.
"It is true Justin. The only thing that men see in me is sex. All of them only used me to have sex and when they got tired of me, they dropped me like a bad habit and ran away." Nick stated, sliding down to the floor, crying. "Men don't want me, they just want me for one thing and one thing only."
"Nick that's not true." Justin spoke.
" Stop trying to make me feel better Justin, it's the truth. All the men in my life have used me, hell even Brian has used me, he raped me." Nick spoke, hearing Justin gasp at the sound of what he just said.
"Oh my God. He raped you? I'm so sorry Nick. I'm sooo sorry." Justin spoke, now reaching for Nick, and Nick pulling away from his, pulling his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around his legs. "I'm sorry Nick, I am not going to hurt you."
"Justin just leave me alone. I need to be alone." Nick stated, letting the tears flow now.
"I am not going to leave you here like this Nick. I like you and I don't want to see you like this." Justin spoke. "Come on."
"No Justin just leave me alone." Nick spoke, his voice trembling.
"Come here Nick." Justin spoke again.
"No Justin, just leave me alone." Nick spoke.
"Please Nick, I...I want to help you. Please come here Nick." Justin stated, moving over to the couch that was in the room.
--- Justin's POV ---
Poor Nick, he's been through a lot lately too. Here I am feeling sorry for myself and here he is trying to hold all this stuff in. I wish he would come over here with me, I so want to hold him and take his pain away. That damn Brian needs his ass kicked. If I could walk, I would hunt him down and kick his ass myself for hurting Nick like that.
"Come on Nick, please come here. I need you." I call out to him. "Please, let me help you. I promise I won't hurt you."
"No Justin, I can't, just leave me alone." He spoke, lying down next to the window.
"I am not going to leave you alone Nick, if you want me to leave you alone, come over here and tell me to leave you alone." I tell him, hoping that would make him come over to me.
"Justin why are you doing this?" He asks me, standing up now, watching me as I get out of the wheelchair, sliding over to the sofa, panting hard as I sit back, happy that I didn't fall in the process. JT's going to be happy to know that I actually got out of that thing without falling. Yay me.
"I want to help you Nick." I tell him, still panting.
"Fine." He says, getting up off the floor and walking towards me. "Justin leave me alone please, I want to be alone."
"Sorry, I am not going to leave you alone Nick, not that easy." I tell him, grabbing him by his arm and pulling him down to me. "You are going to sit here with me, I am not going to let anything else happen to you."
"Justin please." He tells me looking at me with sadness in his eyes.
"Nick..." I say as I lean in, placing a kiss on his lips. "I'm not going to leave you Nick. I will be here with you for as long as I an be. I don't want to leave you Nick and I know you don't want me to leave you. Just sit here with me."
"Justin..." He spoke, as I leaned in and kissed him on his lips again.
"Nothing Nick, we are here right now, just enjoy the moment. No words." I tell him as he lays down on the sofa, laying his head in my lap as I run my fingers through his hair.
====================================== TO BE CONTINUED...
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