Interludes

Hey guys, it's DaraLynn, the one who gleefully tortures you with the "Any Path" trilogy-in-progress. I'm working on story number 3, but while you're waiting... This is a new series, but it's sorta part of the other storyline. This series, the "Interludes" series, is comprised of short stories that take place between "Any Path" and "No Painless Way". You need not have read either of those to read these, but doing so would probably help you to understand and appreciate them more. This is the first of three "Interludes" I've written so far. So far, they're all 'Nsync and all J.C./Justin-ish, though hopefully I will eventually get the inspiration to do BSB ones. I'd like to thank David and Dennis, the kewlest archivers in the world, and everyone who has encouraged me with the "AP" trilogy. I never in my wildest dreams thought I'd get such a response to it. Thank you all, so much. Okay, okay. Here's the story. And any of you on the Nsyncslash list might have read it already, but feel free to peruse it again. :)

Oh, and one last note...the "Interludes" do not necessarily take place in their numbered order...it's an anytime-between-the-big-stories thingy. 'Kay? 'Kay. :)

DISCLAIMER: I do not know or own Justin Timberlake, J.C. Chasez, Lance Bass or Brian Littrell. I am not affiliated with 'Nsync or Backstreet Boys in any way. This is fiction (a.k.a. the ramblings of my crowded head). //...// --- indicates J.C.'s thoughts * * ---- indicates stress on a word or phrase

This is dedicated to, Stacia, the author of "A Love Like This", whose BEAUTIFUL story made me smile so hard my face was aching for hours.

~INTERLUDE 1: VIGIL~ by DaraLynn

"Soft the drowsy hours are creeping Hill and vale in slumber sleeping, I my loving vigil keeping All through the night."

• Welsh Folk Song

"J.C., did he-"

"Ssssh!"

Joshua Scott Chasez hushed his friend from the seat by the bed. Fingers still folded around the clammy hand he clutched, J.C. looked nervously at his sleeping friend. But it was okay, Justin hadn't stirred.

Lance leaned patiently against the door he held open. "Sorry. Did he wake up again yet?" the bass singer whispered.

"No, I guess the medicine really knocked him out. He's restless, though. Been tossing and turning a little."

Lance sighed. "At least he's getting some sleep. That's gotta help. Ya know, Josh, you don't need to be in here all night. Aren't you tired?"

"No." J.C. spoke quickly, fighting the urge to yawn.

The spikey-haired blond looked knowingly at his friend, his small smile visible even in the dim light of the room.

"Okay, yeah, a little. But it's a high fever and he shouldn't be left alone."

"So I'll sit with him."

"Do you ever sleep, Poo-Fu?" J.C. asked, grinning.

"Yeah, I nod off whenever you start talking. But seriously C, one of us can stay with him for a while."

J.C. shook his head.

"Thanks, but I really want to be here. I appreciate it, though. I know it's just a fever, but if it doesn't break soon I'm taking him to a doctor, by force if necessary."

Lance's eyes shifted to Justin. "It will. By sunrise for sure."

"How do you know?"

Lance responded with a casual shrug and his usual answer. "I know everything. So after the fever breaks will you please go to your room and get some rest?"

"Maybe. If he wakes up he might want me to stay. And I should be here in case he needs anything."

Lance smiled sympathetically, his green eyes glowing with a strange, soft light.

"You've really got it bad, huh C?"

J.C. looked down fondly, and a little sadly, at his best friend of six years. His voice was barely audible, even in the stillness of the hotel room. "Yeah."

"He loves you a lot, Josh. Just not..."

"Not that way. Yeah, I know."

J.C. smiled reassuringly at his concerned buddy.

"I'm okay, Scoop. He's my best friend. It's enough."

//Familiar words. I've said them to Justin, to Brian, to Lance, Chris and Joey. You say anything enough times, it starts to sound fake. But it's not! It's just confusing. I'm in love with Justin. I want my best friend.//

J.C.'s fingers played over the hand clasped in his, exchanging heat with the cool skin.

//But I have him. I have him right here. Not in every way I want, but he's the world and the heavens to me. It's not enough, maybe, yet still more happiness than I ever could've hoped for myself. Not enough, but even more. It makes me think that, sometimes, there's absolutely no difference between a lie and the truth.//

"G'nite, J.C."

J.C. jerked a little, having almost forgotten Lance's presence.

"G'nite, Scoop."

He waved at the retreating figure until the door was closed, and again the only sound was Justin's soft breathing. The seventeen-year-old shifted position occasionally, but otherwise showed no sign of waking.

J.C. glanced at the clock on the nightstand. 1:16 a.m. It had been hours since Justin, flushed and disoriented, had complained of not feeling well. J.C. - the so-called expert on Justin Timberlake - would have noticed something was wrong sooner. But his younger best friend had been steadily avoiding him since their argument earlier.

J.C. slumped guiltily at the memory...

------------------------------------------------------------------------ (flashback) (2 p.m. the previous day)

"Okay. Bye."

J.C. hung up the phone and leaned forward, patiently resting his chin in one hand. Looking up, his face lit up like a flashbulb.

His best friend breezed into the hotel room, grinning crazily.

"Hey Josh! C'mon, let's play some basketball! They got a wicked court here and I'm dyin' to kick your Big-Daddy butt!"

J.C. smiled impulsively at Justin's enthusiasm. "Not right now, Curly. I gotta wait for Brian to call back."

The blond's mouth fell into a frown.

"Weren't you guys just talkin'?"

"Yeah, Kev needed the phone, so Brian's looking for his cellular."

Justin suddenly seemed fascinated by the wallpaper.

"So...you guys dating or something?"

"Of course not!"

Justin blinked at the force in his friend's voice.

"Sorry, I just asked! It's just that you guys are always on the phone nowadays."

J.C. shrugged. "So? You and I always are when we're apart."

"Yeah. You and me." The blond singer spoke past the lump he felt growing in his throat. "so what do ya talk about?"

"Ya know. Stuff."

'Nsync's youngest member rolled his eyes.

"Real specific, Josh. C'mon, we tell each other everything."

//Bri and I talk about how we're both madly in love with our straight best friends. I calmly discuss how I want to be intimate with the guy who's been my closest pal since he was twelve. I tell Bri what I can't tell you, Justin, 'cause you feelin' guilty is the last thing I want. What do you want me to say?//

Trying to hide his distraction, J.C. spoke more harshly than he meant to. "It's not really any of your business, Curly!"

Justin winced as if he were slapped.

"You've never said that to me before."

"I'm sorry, Just. But why are you so interested in what Brian and I talk about?"

Now Justin spoke coldly, his blue eyes flashing like ice.

"I'm interested in my best friend's life. Guess I'm just weird like that or somethin'. What, I shouldn't care about what you do?"

J.C. sighed.

"Curly, I know you care about me, believe me-"

"But not like you do about me. Is that what this is about? I can't help how I feel, Josh, any more than you can!"

"Justin, please don't feel bad about that."

Justin's voice rose to a yell that shocked J.C. "DON'T FUCKIN' TELL ME HOW TO FEEL, JOSH!"

Turning on his heel, Justin stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. J.C., bewildered by Justin's outburst, put a hand over his eyes.

//Nice going, Chasez. Handled that real well.//

J.C.'s first instinct was to run after his best friend, but he quickly repressed it. Despite Justin's normally-calm demeanor, he had quite a temper. When it flared up, the best thing to do was give him some time to cool off.

//I didn't tell him because I don't want to hurt him. And I managed to anyway. Damn it.//

J.C. stared gloomily at the ringing telephone. He suddenly didn't much feel like talking. ------------------------------------------------------------------------(end flashback)

The brown-haired singer shook his head, pushing the memory aside. He and Justin had had worse fights, but he couldn't stop his mind from replaying, over and over, the pain in Justin's beautiful eyes. Memory has a substance of its own, he thought vaguely, and when it wants to it can hurt like hell.

Justin's soft moan drew J.C. back to the present. He lightly placed his open hand on the teenager's forehead, and frowned. Still hot. J.C. took a washcloth from the bowl of cool water on the nightstand and wrung it out. Gently he ran the wet cloth over Justin's face, trying to cool the flushed skin. The limp hand he held slightly squeezed his fingers, and sleepy blue eyes opened hesitantly.

"Josh?"

"Sssh, it's okay, Curly. Go back to sleep. I'm sorry I woke you."

"It's all right. I don't mind."

Justin glanced at the clock. "It's 2 a.m., Josh. What are you doing up?"

J.C. pushed a few stray curls back from Justin's face.

"I wanted to stay with you. How do you feel?"

"Weird. Not as bad as before. Josh, I'm really sorry. Best friend or not, I should have respected your privacy."

"It's okay, Just. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that."

Justin started to sit up, and smiled, unsurprised, when J.C. immediately pushed him back down.

"I guess I kinda deserved it. I was just sorta...jealous."

"Jealous?"

"Yeah. Maybe it's stupid, but you talk to Brian a lot now, and I was scared I might lose my best friend. And I don't know what I'd do without you."

J.C. stared incredulously at his sniffling bandmate, his vision blurring with tears. Carefully slipping his hands under Justin's back, J.C. lifted the teenager into a hug, cradling the tired body in his strong arms. Justin leaned his head against J.C.'s chest, closing his eyes against the warm security enfolding him.

J.C. spoke softly, unconsciously rocking back and forth.

"Justin, you will never, ever lose me. Brian and I are buddies, yeah, but you...God, you're my heart and soul. I'd be lost if I didn't have you. You are the reason I keep breathing, the reason the world is so beautiful to me. First and foremost, you are my best friend. Whatever other love I feel for you doesn't change what we have. It doesn't put you under any obligation, and I wouldn't give it up no matter how impossible it is. You're the best thing in my life, Curly, and that will never change."

Justin whimpered a little against J.C.'s T-shirt. "I wish I could love you that way. I wish I were different."

"Don't ever wish to be anything but what you are, Justin. It's you I love, whatever you feel, whatever you do. Okay?"

Justin's arms tightened around his best friend.

"I love you too, Josh."

J.C. smiled, gently brushing a hand over the smooth blond curls. Reluctantly, he set Justin back down, laying his head on the pillows.

"Now go back to sleep, Blondie."

"Me? You're the one who's been up all night. You better get some rest before you turn into J.C. the Singing Zombie."

J.C. laughed softly. "Okay. After you go to sleep."

"Um, actually..."

"What, Just?"

"Could you maybe...um...sleep in here with me? I kinda don't wanna be alone."

"Of course I will."

"You don't have to if you don't wanna. I don't wanna...you know..tease you or anything."

"You're not teasing me, Justin. Besides, I sleep better with you close by."

Justin grinned. "You too? Wow. Cool."

J.C. slid under the blankets and wrapped his arms around his little angel. Justin giggled quietly before resting his head on J.C.'s shoulder and closing his eyes.

"'Nite, Josh."

"G'nite, baby."

J.C. immediately regretted that last word, but Justin simply smiled as he surrendered to sleep. The older boy remained awake for a few minutes more, thinking as he watched shadows dancing against the walls.

//God, I'm so lucky. When I told Justin how I feel about him, he could've freaked out and walked away from me right there and then. Instead he's never left my side on this strange road we've travelled, from recognition to fame to stardom. He lets me fuss over him without too much protesting, hugs me back when I hold him, doesn't wince when I call him 'baby' and even lets me beat him at basketball once in a while. The fans are right...he's just about perfect.

//How many silly arguments have we had all these years, how many dumb fights? Does it even matter? I was stupid to think any little misunderstanding could come between us. Nothing could.//

J.C. smiled sleepily, soothingly patting Justin's back. He thought one last thing, before finally drifting off.

//As long as I live, nothing will ever take my heart from him. If God is love and love is sacred, nothing will ever sever what we have.//

The sun rose a few hours later, casting golden light into the silent room. Justin's fever had broken. Nothing else had.

~FIN~ (for now) Feedback (no flames) and questions are always welcome to me at DaraLynn_writings@hotmail.com