The Jamie Lynn Spears "FUCK YOU" Show The Jamie Lynn Spears "FUCK YOU" Show - Episode 1 "My First Fuckin Show"
Written by: TVM (mrtvm@mrtvm.com)
Archive: http://www.asstr.org/~TheVertManArchive/Stories/Celeb/Jamie/Index.html
** Disclaimer: This story is purely fantasy and is based on the fictional life of real celebrities. The events portrayed in this series (although I wish) are not an accurate depiction of the star and or stars real lives. Any reposting or archiving without written permission is an infringement on the copyright of this series. So in other words You damn well better ask before you steal it.**
Starring: Jamie Lynn Spears
Guest Starring: Alexa Nikolas
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"...that's next week on an all new Cumming Out: Hawaiian Style" The Announcer said as that very show had just concluded. The credits rolling as Summer made a mad dash to the bathroom and getting back just as the final credits ended and we went to a black screen for a long moment. Course Summer and I had some idea what we thought we were in for, but what we got was a shock to the system and to be honest, a good one too. "The Tanned Princess is back..."
"This should be good, I wonder if she's really gonna go off on people like it says in the ads" Summer said as I shrugged. A logo with the words "FUCK YOU" spelled out in a neon sign appeared on screen. Both of us laughed and wondered what the hell we were in for now. We then saw the words 'The Jamie Lynn Spears' appear above the neon sign and the word 'Show' appear below both.
"America please help me welcome back, the tanned princess herself...Jamie Lynn Spears" The Announcer said as we saw someone sitting with their back to the camera in what looked like a make-up chair. Spinning around we could see it was Jamie Lynn herself with a huge smile on her face. A victorious, 'look what I did' smile to boot. She was looking as hot as ever wearing a cut off t-shirt, barely covering her firm young titties and perfectly showed off her dark tanned flat and sooo sexy stomach, a pair of daisy dukes that showed off her panties and tanned legs filled out the simple outfit. "Let the shit hit the fan!"
"Fuck you Doc Evans you cock sucker" Jamie Lynn said to the announcer as he laughed. "What are you laughing at? You are a cocksucker."
"And you are a horny little slut" He said as Jamie Lynn flipped off the camera and said, "You see that bitch?"
"Yes miss attitude I see that" Doc said with an amused sound to his voice. "Can we get on with this or do you wanna spend the entire half hour trading insults with a voice?"
"No I got some shit to say and you need to help me hit my bullet points fuck face" Jamie Lynn said, "You mention the names and I'll hand out my fuck you's of the week."
"Let's start with your favorite person...Mackenzie Rosman" Doc said with a laugh.
"FUCK YOU!" Jamie Lynn screamed with a double barrel middle finger salute towards the camera. "I told you whore, I fuckin told you I'd be back. Now your retarded show is leading into mine..."
"That's Cumming Out: Hawaiian Style Tuesdays, at 8, 7 central right here on Taboo TV" Doc said in a his best announcer voice.
"One more wise crack like that shit for brains and you're gonna be looking for a new job" Jamie Lynn said as Doc laughed. "As I was saying, Mackenzie Rosman, bitch seriously thinks her shit don't stink cause she's got her own show. Now her head is like a balloon since that skank Willa Holland somehow got her own show because of Mackenzie. Well I got news for Mackenzie you pussy licking dyke, I got my own show and you couldn't stop it. Why?"
"Cause you're a pussy licking dyke too?" Doc asked as Jamie Lynn groaned and laughed. "You're cute when you're mad JL."
"Shut the fuck off" Jamie Lynn said as Doc piped down. "Now...as I was saying to Mackenzie, you couldn't stop this show from airing, and I know you tried. Why? Because the morons who run this channel see real talent and they wanted me. Regardless of what you did to block it, so FUCK YOU."
"So the lawsuit had nothing to do with it?" Doc asked.
"You mention that again, YOU'RE DEAD" Jamie Lynn screamed in a rage. "They screwed me three ways from Sunday and sometimes you gotta open people's eyes with a well placed threat to get their attention. I did. And now I'm sitting here on the set of my own damn show with my name under the title of Executive Producer. I run this show, MEEEEEEEE. Not some whore who slept her way to the top of this company..."
"Jamie sweety that might get you sued" Doc advised as Jamie Lynn clammed up for a moment and waited for him to go on. "That was mature by the way. Moving along...next is Hayden Panettiere."
"FUCK YOU!" Jamie Lynn screamed with another double barrel middle finger salute towards the camera.
"I see what your trademark is gonna be..." Doc giggled.
"Now there's a blond ass whore if there ever was one" Jamie Lynn said, seemingly paying no attention to Doc's previous comment, "You can't be straight, how many asses have you fucked anyway? All she ever wants to do, fuck it's like pussy is a bad thing to her."
"Are you jealous?" Doc asked. "She had your ass."
"You think I don't know that?" Jamie Lynn asked, "I was also the girl who licked all those pussies for her while she pounded at those asses. I'm not saying her being obsessed with ass is bad, I'm saying she should try pussy once in a while. She might like it."
"Well she is dating Mackenzie Rosman and I've seen her go down on quiet a few girls since the debut of...Cumming Out: Hawaiian Style, Tuesdays @ 8, 7 central here on Taboo TV" Doc said in his announcer voice as Jamie Lynn groaned.
"Doc I am asking you not to make me come find you and make a girl out of you" Jamie Lynn said, "I am getting ready to you prick bastard."
"Bring it on Tanned Princess" Doc said in a giggle. "You can suck daddies big one."
"Daddy maybe, yours no, mister three inches of hard cock" Jamie Lynn said.
"OUCH!" Doc said, "OK, OK, you got me, don't need to be cruel. I'm gonna be good now. Next is Kristen Alderson. This is should be funny as hell."
"Thank you, Kristen you seem to be a sweet girl..."
"HUH?" Doc asked in confusion. "You fall out of your chair and hit that pretty head?"
"Shut up" Jamie Lynn said as she held up her hand, "I am sorry for what happened out in front of the Taboo TV building in LA. I am hoping if you ever see this you'll call me and we can talk and you are more than welcome to come on my show to sound off about shit if you want."
"That was so..." Doc said as he seemed to be fighting back tears, "...beeeuuuutttttiiiiful."
"Smart ass" Jamie Lynn said.
"Of course JL" Doc giggled, "Alexa Nikolas. Let the fireworks begin..."
"No it's not fireworks you shit for brains" Jamie Lynn said as she stood and walked across the room. Jamie Lynn's cute little ass wiggling as she walked towards the door. The slashes in her 'Daisy Dukes' leaving very little doubt as to what she was wearing under them (NOTHING!) as her darkly tanned ass cheeks could be seen. "I'm gonna show all of you TV whores out there exactly how forgiving and caring I can be. This is my show and for once I can do things my way..."
"Right..." Doc said.
"Pipe down headless dick" Jamie Lynn said before going on, "Behind this door is my co-host or at least I hope she will be. For now she's my first guest star."
"Alexa Nikolas" Jamie Lynn said as she opened the door leading out to the hallway and to my shock and I'm sure everyone else's as well, there stood the stunning Alexa Nikolas. Nervously smiling, wearing a simple pair of jean shorts and white t-shirt. "Ladies and Gentletwerps, my co-host."
"Jamie Lynn's been smokin some good shit folks" Doc said as Alexa laughed and Jamie Lynn groaned.
"Come on in I was serious and there is the camera and we are gonna settle this so-called feud once and for all" Jamie Lynn said.
"I got my revenge on you, I don't need to settle anything with you" Alexa said with a suddenly smug smile, "As far as I'm concerned I'm here for the paycheck and if this is a one time gig, fine."
"We don't validate parking missy" Doc said.
"OK then we don't need to settle anything..."
"On second thought we do need to settle something...that bitch sister of yours had no right to talk to me that way" Alexa said in a defiant voice.
"Let's get ready to rumble..." Doc said.
"Look let's leave my sister out of this cause I had no way of knowing she was gonna do you that way" Jamie Lynn said.
"BEEP BEEP bull shit detector" Doc said as Jamie Lynn flipped the camera off again.
"I agree with the headless dick about that" Alexa said, "That bitch runs her cock sucker on me and gets me to cry and you had no idea? BULL SHIT."
"Hey! No name calling" Doc said.
"OK I'm sorry" Jamie Lynn said to Alexa as she tentatively put her hands on Alexa's arms, "Britney is a bitch and a skank, so I'm sorry and I wanted you on my show to make up for the way that I did you on Zoey 101, OK?"
"I dunno, cause I never did get to know the real you on that show, cause you can go from being a spoiled brat princess to cute and nice in 5 seconds" Alexa said as she watched Jamie Lynn step forward. "What are you doing?"
"Cute and nice?" Jamie Lynn said as she playfully stroked her finger down Alexa's cheek and looked into her eyes. "Is it working?"
"Maybe, what are you working for?" Alexa asked as Jamie Lynn shocked everyone as she leaned forward and kissed Alexa on the lips. Pressing her body to Alexa's as their lips fell in time with each others for a long moment. Alexa's hands going to Jamie Lynn's waist and gently stroking her fingers over the darkly tanned baby smooth skin. Their lips working slowly against the others in a simple kiss as both sighed into the others mouth and Jamie Lynn's hands came up to cup around the back of Alexa's neck as she kissed her in a slightly quicker pace. Alexa slipping her arms around Jamie Lynn's waist and licking the girls upper lip in a seductive show as they parted briefly and grinned at each other before Jamie Lynn slipped her arms around Alexa's neck and met the girls tongue with her own as she began to massage her tongue with Alexa's. Jamie Lynn pulling away with a nervous smile and suggestive licking of her lips and asking, "Good?"
"MMMMMMMM very good" Alexa said in a sultry voice as her and Jamie Lynn giggled. "You're forgiven..."
"Always was a good kisser" Jamie Lynn said as she slipped out of Alexa's arms and tried to walk off when Alexa grabbed her from behind and hugged her again. "Let me go you dyke bitch."
"Yeh let her go she don't like pussy" Doc said as both froze and then started laughing at the comment.
"I do too like pussy you cock length challenged fucktard" Jamie Lynn said.
"I'm getting tired of you making fun of my lack of male prowess" Doc said in a hurt voice. "I do have feelings."
"Doc used to be a super hero" Jamie Lynn said.
"Oh yeah?" Alexa asked and obviously playing along.
"The Dickless Wonder" Jamie Lynn said as both laughed and we heard no response from Doc.
"I think you hurt his feelings" Alexa said.
"I hope I did" Jamie Lynn said, "Now as for you Ms. Alexa, what do you say we take a break? And on the flip side we'll play a game."
"Find Jamie Lynn's hairy spot?" Alexa asked in a sultry voice.
"Won't find any hair on this tanned princess, below her head" Jamie Lynn said as Alexa spun her around and kissed her softly on the lips for a long moment.
"Back in 2 and 2 or maybe longer, just go away and watch some fuckin commercials" Jamie Lynn said as Alexa laughed and they hugged and the 'FUCK YOU' logo appeared and we went away to break and me and Summer had to admit that was a very entertaining first half of the show. We both laughed so hard our sides hurt at the banter between Jamie Lynn and Doc. Summer grabbed me and her a soda just as the show came back on with a bang, the 'FUCK YOU' logo crashing back into the screen. It went away and we saw that Jamie Lynn and Alexa were now on a bed, in the missionary position with Jamie Lynn on top.
"MMMMMM we're back Princess" Alexa said as she looked up at Jamie Lynn.
"So what, this is my real bedroom now they know that, let them watch I wanna get lost in you" Jamie Lynn said as she kissed a smiling Alexa on the lips and held it for a moment, in a sizzling start to a slow french kiss as her tongue almost immediately found Alexa's and their lips fell in time with each others as their tongues massaged against the other. Alexa moaning and moving a hand to Jamie Lynn's darkly tanned stomach as she stroked it up and under her shirt. Jamie Lynn pulled away for a moment and looked down as Alexa's hand squeezed her breast under her shirt and asked, "What do you think you're doing?"
"Having my way with you my tanned princess" Alexa said as she sat up and Jamie Lynn smiled as she lifted her arms willingly and let Alexa lift the shirt over her head. Before she kissed Alexa again softly on the lips and unbuttoned Alexa's jean shorts and started pulling them down along with the girls underwear as their tongues had once again found each other. Alexa pulling away reluctantly and standing as Jamie Lynn skinned the jean shorts and panties down the girls thighs and tossed them aside. Smiling up at Alexa as she slipped her hand between Alexa's thighs and rubbing her pussy as Alexa's thighs seemed to quiver and she moaned as Jamie Lynn laid back on the bed and motioned for Alexa to lower down. Alexa seemed to be in shock as Jamie Lynn guided her on down to her face. Jamie slowly licked up and down Alexa's smooth pussy a few times as Alexa shook in pleasure and stripped her shirt off and tossed it side.
"Will you lay down for me?" Jamie Lynn asked in a sweet voice as Alexa smiled and rolled off to the side and laid down beside Jamie Lynn for the moment. Jamie Lynn grinning as she rolled on top and pinned Alexa down. "Ha."
"No fair" Alexa said as she offered no resistance. "This is why you have such a bad rep."
"That's why I'm gonna show everyone right now can good I can be to you" Jamie Lynn said as she released Alexa's hands and kissed her softly as she slipped down her body and kissed her stomach and then each thigh as she made her way down. Getting on her stomach and waiting for the camera to get into place as she smiled up from between Alexa's spread thighs. Before she circled her arms around the outside of Alexa's thighs and held her hands up as Alexa pressed her hands to Jamie Lynn's in a show of unity and laced their fingers together. Alexa smiling and jerking a little at the surprise of Jamie Lynn's tongue licking up her pussy slit once and then again slow and soft. No more glances at the camera I noticed now as she concentrated on Alexa's pleasure and licked her slowly still from top to bottom. Alexa moaning and whimpering in delight as she squeezed her hands into Jamie Lynn's and squirmed a little. Jamie Lynn kissing her pussy softly and looking up, "See I can be good to you, I know what you like."
"MMMMMMM god yes, put it inside a little for me, it feels sooo good like that?" Alexa asked as Jamie Lynn smiled and lowered her head and did exactly that. As she began to fuck her tongue in and out gently on the underside of Alexa's clit. Alexa's moaning returning as her stomach drew in and her eyes closing as the pleasure flowed into her body. Jamie Lynn kept a steady pace as she pumped her tongue into Alexa's pussy, rubbing her tongue on the underside of the girls clit the hole time. Alexa whimpering a few times and arching her back as she pulled at Jamie Lynn's hands and tried to take in all of the pleasure as Jamie Lynn continued to pump her tongue in and out slow and steady. "Jamie Lynn it feels sooooo good."
"Want me to keep going like that? I promise I'll make you cum" Jamie Lynn said softly.
"Can you lick my clit real soft now? It feels so good to cum like that" Alexa asked as Jamie Lynn smiled and gently licked across Alexa's clit just as she had asked and felt the girl squeeze her fingers tight and knew she was getting close. Alexa moaned louder as her eyes rolled back in her head and arched her back a bit more and tried not to squirm as Jamie Lynn licked her clit softly over and over in a steady rhythm that appeared to be so perfect Alexa was getting lost in the growing sensations. Her body started to shake gently as she let out one last loud moan as she raised her and Jamie Lynn's hands slightly off the bed. Jamie Lynn licked her clit again and again softly until Alexa couldn't hold back anymore and moaned out loud as she started cumming. Jamie Lynn focusing her licking on Alexa's clit still as her friend shook for a moment and squeezed their fingers tightly until she settled down and a bubbling oozing mess started to appear on her pussy as Jamie Lynn smiled and licked it up lovingly and seemed to love the sweet flavor she had worked to draw out of Alexa.
"WOW that is so sweet" Jamie Lynn said as she again licked at Alexa's pussy and got all of the honey cum off she could get. "MMMMMMM so sweet Sexi Lexa."
"MMMMMM soooo perfect" Alexa moaned softly as she released Jamie Lynn's hands. "You were so perfect to me my tanned princess."
"Was I really?" Jamie Lynn asked as she crawled over Alexa's body and laid her body on Alexa's. Alexa smiling as she played with Jamie Lynn's hair.
"So unbelievably perfect" Alexa said as she kissed her softly. "No one has ever did it so right, god I'm cumming just think about it now."
"No one?" Jamie Lynn asked with a coy smile.
"Nope" Alexa said as she kissed her again and smiled as she licked her lips and said, "It is sweet huh?"
"Girl you taste like candy" Jamie Lynn said as Alexa grinned. "It's better than honey."
"Well thank you" Alexa said, "Now tell me was that just a show for the camera or are you gonna do that again for me when its off?"
"I told you, let them assholes watch I wanted to prove I can be good to you" Jamie Lynn said.
"And I'll show you how good I can be to you in a minute...again and again" Alexa said.
"MMMMMMMMM OK..." Jamie Lynn said as she rose along with Alexa and turned as Alexa scooted back on the bed and now leaning against the pillows she pulled a surprised Jamie Lynn back between thighs and wrapped the girls in her arms. "Ummmmm OK?"
"You don't like this?" Alexa asked.
"No I do actually, now shhhh...." Jamie Lynn said as she kissed her softly for a long moment and then turning back to the camera screamed, "DOC!"
"What god damn it?" Doc asked.
"Tell the assholes in TV land what the fuck is up next week" Jamie Lynn said, "And then leave us the fuck alone."
"Next week on the Jamie Lynn Spears 'FUCK YOU' Show..." Doc said and beginning to giggle as he went on, "...Sexi Lexa and her Tanned Princess will be making kisses faces for the half hour. Join us then."
"THAT'S IT YOU'RE FUCKIN DEAD THREE INCH COCK BOY" Jamie Lynn screamed as Alexa held her in place and Doc laughed as the credits rolled. Jamie Lynn and Alexa beginning to wrestle as both laughed and just before the screen faded to black, both raised double middle fingers to the camera and screamed in unison, "FUCK YOU."