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Josh & Brian
Part 1
Josh and Brian were both in their early 20's, and interested in computers and the surfing the net. Each had an Internet access account from their homes which captivated them for hours on end with all of the titillating things they'd discover every time they logged on.
Over time the two would become best friends and more as they grew to fantasize about things alone that they would ultimately experience when they CAME together. For now, they just had fun hanging out around town and driving around in each other's new cars. Once home, they would spend endless hours playing games over the Internet, which would serve only as a partial release of the penned-up post-adolescent sexual frustrations that careened throughout their bodies daily.
Brian who was more in-touch and aware of his sensuality and sexuality than Josh at this point would often fantasize about things as they both spent endless hours both together and on-line. Afraid he might ruin a perfectly good friendship, Brian would keep his innermost thoughts and feelings to himself and never share them with anyone for fear they would be misinterpreted and forever change the way the world looked at him. At times, Brian would feel an extra special closeness toward his friend Josh. A closeness that was more than that for any other friend he'd ever met. It transcended the "normal and reasonable" boundaries of what a good friendship was supposed to be as he was becoming more and more aware of daily.
At the same time Josh was experiencing a similar sensual and sexual awakening on his own. It was an awakening that mirrored what was going on with his best friend Brian across-town. He was at a stage in his life where he wasn't quite sure where he was, but he too had more than just a passing interest in boys his age and more specifically a burgeoning interest in his friend Brian.
When Brian and Josh would meet they would frequently exchange awkward glances in between conversations. They both knew and felt that this friendship would forever alter their lives in ways they could not even imagine at this time. Daily, both thought how, just how could they break the news to the other about how they really felt ? If they just came out and said how they felt what would happen ? What would that mean ? The questions were endless as were the extreme feelings of sexual frustration that had became a part of their everyday existence.
Brian knew that he and Josh were in their prime. Single, nothing holding them back, around the same age, and with great equipment. When Brian would look at Josh he would have to control himself to keep from staring too long and tipping his hand about how he felt. Frustrated, both would come together and have fun only to go their separate ways and prolong the frustration of one not being able to tell each other how the other felt. If one could just tell the other how he really felt. There's so much love to be shared, a hug, a kiss, to fondle one another to hold and touch each other in places they could only dream of. If someone could just give them permission. Tell them that what they're feeling is a perfectly natural experience and that its perfectly all right to live in the moment and let go of the societal taboos that are ruining their special friendship.
Josh & Brian
Part 2
A few days went by and things between Brian and Josh were getting hotter and hotter, something had to give, something or someone had to break the ice. Finally, one Friday after work Josh was feeling specially HOT. His usual excursions on the Net and the lonely trips to his bedroom were not going to be enough this night. He had to do something. Something to "come out" and express his TRUE feelings for Brian. But what, what could he do without risking exposure and embarrassment in the wrong way ? Would Brian embarrass him ? Would his life ever be the same ? Probably not he thought but at this point it was well worth the risk. He was tired of the constant "go no where, do nothing" existence he had been living up 'til now. It was time to come screaming out of that closet and let Brian know that he was ready to put the torch to that ice and melt it forever. After sitting alone for several hours in stone silence, Josh tried to pick up the phone to make "that call". The one that would send him to oblivion. The one call that would turn his many fantasies into stark reality. He felt his extremities go numb as he held the receiver. He kept having to press the on-hook button to bring the dial-tone back because he was taking too long.
Josh once again hung-up the phone and once again it was time to reflect. Many times during High School Josh, would think about this girl and that but often he would find there wasn't anything particularly sexually exciting about them. There was something missing, some hidden element. He'd heard the story about the "Birds and the Bees" from his dad when he was just a young pup but none of that seemed to matter much now. Josh was truly at a cross-road in his life that he could no longer ignore. He found that he fantasized about other boys in his class when he jacked off at night, and the thought that he was gay always crossed his mind, but never really bothered him. It didn't seem like a big issue to him somehow.
He was an adult now, and even though he still lived with his parents somehow deep down he knew that he must venture out into the world and soon. This was it. This was all he could take. Josh thought to himself that he's been working steadily for a couple of years now, and there is no time for him to be concerned about it, anyway. He didn't date anyone, and he figured that when the time came, he would figure out his sexuality and take whatever steps he thought were necessary. Life and its mysterious meanderings were that simple to him.
As his courage built to finally make his move Josh felt his cock becoming erect. It was harder than anytime that he'd ever remembered. The very thought of the wonderful possibilities that lay ahead with him finally coming out to his friend and best-buddy Brian were making it swell with anticipation. As the sensitivity of his cock grew Josh felt he might come right there just from the friction of his cock rubbing against his underwear. He took a deep breath and picked up the receiver once again. This time he was going through the door. "Damn the Torpedoes", "Batten down the hatches", It was "Full Steam ahead" now and there was definitely no turning back. Before he could dial, Josh had to reach down and unzip his pants to free his cock from it's prison of denim. It popped out as if freed from a lifetime sentence of solitary confinement. He stared down at it momentarily noticing that it was thick, thicker than ever and bulging with all the CUM that had built up over the years with all those feeble-hearted ejaculations that he'd had just fantasizing. He dare not touch it now for fear that it would literally explode into a million pieces. It felt so liberated though so happy to be outside. It was as if it was anticipating the phone call he was about to make. He paused once again just long enough to fantasize about Brian sucking on his virgin cock. Would he wrap his mouth all around it and be able to drink his Cum as if it were the first drink after a long dry-spell in the desert ? He could only imagine... For a moment he leaned back in his chair and thrust his hips upward as if delivering his hot Jism deep into Brian's warm, moist and waiting mouth.
He thought to himself "Take it !!! Take it all !!!" Within seconds Josh found himself once again handling his massive erection. This had to be carried through to it's logical conclusion. He couldn't stop now. He couldn't let this go any longer. His body trembled with heat and excitement. It's as if Brian were right there in front of him, on his knees and waiting for Josh to come. Just then, Josh let the phone drop from his trembling hand as this would require his complete and undivided attention. "All hand's on Dick (I mean deck)" sorry about that... Slowly, he slipped over to his bed so as not to loose the momentum. One hand on his massive erection, his eyes closed, and the other hand guiding him to the center of the bed. He kept his head turned back as he slumped into the center of the bed. At that point Josh undid his pants very slowly and slipped them off all the while keeping the mental picture in his mind that he was about to get the blowjob of his life from his truly best and only friend and companion in the world. It was as if his subconscious mind had disconnected from the conscious world all the better to keep him enraptured. His hips began to move up and down ever so slowly with his hand barely sliding up and down his hot, thick, erection. Within seconds Josh felt the Cum within him preparing to shoot forward. He was right on the verge. He wanted to pause for a moment and get some tissues. Something to stop the Geyser of Jism that was sure to shoot out at any moment. But he slipped back in. Nothing was going to ruin this for him. This was as close as he would Cum to having the real thing before he actually did "have the real thing".
Why... it's a Virtual Blow-Job his computer-trained mind thought to itself. It was at that moment that Josh gave one last upward thrust with his hips into what truly felt like the back of Brian's throat. Just then it let loose. He felt the Jism leave his body like a torpedo leaving the launch-bay. He tensed up as the orgasm got stronger and the Jism shot higher. He cried out and moaned loudly as his Cum shot high into the air. All the muscles surrounding his cock were draining the energy from all the reserves in his body. Again and again he thrust his hips higher and higher as he completely emptied his pouch of all remaining Cum reserves. When all was done Josh slumped to his bed and lay motionless. He stared up at the ceiling only to notice that his cum had shot straight up to the light which hung over his bed and was beginning to drip back down. He grabbed his underpants and immediately covered the area it would drip down on. At that point Josh closed his eyes, slowly clenched his teeth and slowly uttered the words... "I love you Brian..." His voice trailed off as he fell asleep.
Tomorrow would be another day. The day of reckoning for both Brian and Josh. Things would never be the same...
Josh & Brian
Part 3
As he slept that night Josh would have many dreams of he and Brian taking turns getting each other off one way then another way. He would awaken many times during the night and just lay there as the excitement and anticipation would build until he could make the "phone call" the next morning. Many times during the night he toyed with the idea of calling Brian even if it meant taking the risk of waking him out of a sound sleep. Somehow he theorized, "Brian couldn't be sleeping, not now, not with me feeling the way I do about him, about us." He would motion towards the phone only to come to his senses and pull back into himself and grit his teeth in frustration. Little did he know Brian was on the other side of town wrestling with the same feelings, the same frustrations, and many of the same anxieties as Josh. If only he knew.
It was 3:00am Saturday morning when Brian was awakened out of a sound sleep as if someone were standing there waiting to talk to him. He immediately noticed a warm and slippery substance coated his underwear and bedding down by his crotch. Could it be, he wondered to himself ? You've got to be kidding... he thought quickly. It had been several years since Brian succumbed to the effects of a wet dream. But this time it had happened just the same way it did when he was only 13 years old and had experienced it for the first time. Why did this time feel so much like the first one. He knew immediately it had to be due his best-friend Josh who lived across town. There was no denying it any longer, Brian had fantasized about Josh many days and many nights as the two worked side-by-side repairing computers by day and dreaming of each other by night. As he lay there motionless his mind became consumed with many deep and lustful thoughts of his friend Josh. He'd wondered many times in the past what Josh would be up to at different times during the night. Brian you see was a firm believer in the (little-known) science of mental telepathy. Many times during the day he'd try to communicate to Josh how much he loved him. How, if Josh would just trust and give him the chance he would love him in many ways. Brian you see was as protective of his friend Josh as a big brother is to a little brother. He would lay down his life in a moment's notice for him. Never would he let any harm come to his friend. At work he would always stand up for Josh when others would insult or badger him needlessly because of his youth or immaturity. Brian was truly the big brother and protector that Josh had always wanted but could never have.
In Josh's household he often felt victimized by his fathers rage. He'd get blamed for everything going wrong being the oldest sibling while his younger brother could get away with murder. Over the years his frustration turned to anger as he found himself given to fits of rage at the slightest provocation. Others around him like his friends and coworkers could often see through this rather thin-veneer to what was really going on deep down inside of him. Josh was just another frustrated and confused boy trying to become a man. Often over the years he to would be given to fits of rage similar to his fathers all the time asking, why... Why am I so angry ? As the years passed and he progressed toward his adolescence the anger and frustration with his situation grew. Those around him knew this and hoped he'd just outgrow it. The key to all this penned-up rage and frustration could be traced back to his current living situation. He was a boy desperately trying to become a man. He needed to move out, to get on his own, to discover who he truly was and stop having his mom (and especially his dad) dictate his life as if he were just a Pawn in their Chess game of life. But the world around him often felt confusing. There were many unanswered questions. Who would be there for him if he ventured out on his own ? Surely he couldn't look to the very source of his frustration and anger for answers. Who would he turn to ? As is always the case in these situations the answer is was staring him right in the face literally (or at least 8 hours a day anyway). But as always he was still to blind or too oblivious to notice it. Josh would continue working side-by-side with the one solution, the one answer he needed to take that last step. The very person he could trust with his deep, dark secrets. The one who would be there for him and console him on those lonely days when no one else would listen.
It was 6:00am in the morning now, the morning sun was just coming up through Josh's bedroom window. His erection still present from the night before. Upon awakening, he immediately knew what lie ahead of him this Saturday morning. It was D-Day, the day of reckoning, the day when he would finally test his faith in his fellow man like never before. He stood up, got dressed and went immediately for the phone. His mom asked him if he'd wanted any breakfast and he yelled back not today mom as he immediately dialed Brian's number. Everything was racing 100 miles an hour now, his adrenaline was high. He never even stopped long enough to see what time it was or ask himself how smart it was calling someone at 6:00am in the morning. He could feel his heart move closer and closer to his throat as he pressed each digit in Brian's phone number. Breathing heavily now, his erection had subsided. He heard the first ring and suddenly all of the insecurities of the past came rushing back. He thought quickly, should I hang up ? Is it too soon ? Will he be mad ? Will he be ready ? With each question Josh gulped as if to swallow the questions out of sight. Another ring, his hands began to tremble with the prospects of what lie ahead. Just then there was a voice on the other end of the phone. It was warm, pleasant and inviting. "Hello ???" It was Brian. "Hi Brian", he quipped back. A pause and then... "Brian..." He paused and tried to regain his composure. Brian sat up on the bed realizing it was Josh. He glances over at the clock. It's 6:00 in the morning he thinks quietly. Not wanting to alarm Josh or scare him off Brian maintains his composure and says "Josh..." "Brian... I... I..." Brian began to get an immediate erection when he heard Josh's stumbling, bumbling voice on the other end. He somehow knew why Josh was calling and immediately wanted to rush to his side and rescue him. Come on Josh he thought. Hang in there, you can do it. "Brian, I...I..."
Tomorrow... the encounter...
Josh & Brian
Part 4
"I... Love... " Josh hangs up the phone after loosing his nerve. Damn!!!, Brian exclaims. He was right there... Right there... Brian lays back down and tries to calm down. More frustrated than ever now he replays the incident over and over again in his mind. What could I have said ? What could I have done ? He wonders loudly. Aroused by the whole incident he reaches down and grabs his now-erect member and begins to play with his flaccid tool. Slowly but surely he works himself into a pre-orgasmic frenzy. Every minute or so he pauses to ponder the attempted phone call from Josh. He continues slowly masturbating and daydreaming of the event that could have been. But seems further away now more than ever.
Josh sits by the phone for several minutes in a trance-like state with his had on the receiver. He's paralyzed, frozen with fear and trepidation; the very thing that's kept him from proceeding on with his life up 'til now. His big moment came and went and once again he didn't meet the challenge. Suddenly, the phone rings. He's startled and almost falls off his chair. His heart begins racing once again as he wonders if it's Brian calling him back. Is he ready ? What will he say ? What will he do ? A million scenarios run through his mind as his breathing becomes quick and shallow. He stares back at the phone as if to say go away Brian I'm not ready yet. This is too much too soon. But the phone just keep's ringing. His mother finally calls out from the kitchen startling him once again. "Would someone get that ?" He reaches over slowly to the receiver and then grabs it commandingly. Who is it ? He asks with an air of superiority in his voice. The caller answers back, "it's dad... let me speak to mom". He breathes a deep sigh of relief and yells to his mother to pick up the phone. He waits a few seconds and hangs up the extension when he hears the two begin talking. He saunters over to the bed and buries his head deep within his pillow covering his whole head by lifting the sides of the pillow. He begins kicking his feet slowly out of frustration with himself and the whole situation. He stops suddenly and grabs a small throw-pillow laying on the floor. He places it between his crotch and the bed and begins to slowly gyrate on it in a circular motion. As he does this he begins to get aroused and frustrated. Again, he stops suddenly and sits up on the edge of his bed. He takes a deep breath and storms out of the room and past the kitchen where his parents are sitting at the table. He pauses only long enough to say "I'm going out and I'm not sure when I'll be back so don't wait dinner" in a commanding voice. His father pauses from the morning paper and peers over the edge of the turned pages with a stern look at Josh. He starts to speak as Josh continues on through the front door grabbing his keys on the way out. He quickly gets in and starts the car. His dad comes to the front door only to see Josh already backing out of the driveway and taking off down the street as if headed to a fire. But the only fire Josh would be going to this day would be the one in his pants. His crotch was flaming with heat that could only be quenched by one person... Brian.
Laying quietly in bed now Brian's feelings of frustration and anguish had subsided somewhat and he was ready to tackle the day. The thought of continuing to masturbate until he climaxed seemed to big a let down given the events of the morning. He didn't even feel much like getting out of bed really. He sits up for a moment and decides to surf the net. While on he decides to visit a few Website's that titillate him all over again. He sigh's when he realizes that it will take more time for Josh to finally admit what they both have known all along. They were made for each other. Their ages, interests, hobbies and lifestyles all coincide. What keeps them apart ? If he could just communicate to Josh somehow how great they would be together. He replayed the scenario once again in his mind. Josh I love you, I always have and you know you love me. Why don't you just admit it. We're perfect together. We like most of the same things and we get along great. What else could you ask for ? He began to loose himself in his thoughts once again as he thought about what he would do if Josh were there at his place. Josh he though, this doesn't have to hurt. I promise I'll be gentle. You can trust me Josh I love you so much. You can't even imagine... As time went on Brian began to rub the front of his crotch as he once again, fantasized about the being with Josh. His breathing grew quick and shallow as his pace quickened. He was on the verge of shooting his massive load when... the doorbell rang. The mood immediately dies as Brian pulls up his pants. He immediately gains his composure as he forces down the cum that was just on the verge of shooting out his throbbing tool. He gets up hurriedly as he prepares to destroy who ever is at the door. The doorbell rings again. Brian yells out that clich' phrase. "I'm cumming... I'm cumming..." And he was... a little... He grabs for the doorknob slipping the first time and trying again to hastily get the door opened. This time he succeeds and there he is... Face to face with his destiny... Josh. He pauses for a moment. His dreams have been answered he thinks to himself. Or have they ? He invites Josh in and continues to regain his composure. Josh just walks in deliberately but silently. He sits down on the couch in the living-room and slowly gazes up at Brian. Almost as if to say... "Help me Brian I'm lost" Completely out of character Brian motions Josh to follow him. He grabs the remote and quickly turns off the TV. They proceed back to Brian's bedroom where Josh sits on his bed and resumes looking at the floor. Brian pauses at the doorway staring at Josh sitting helplessly on his bed. He walks over slowly to Josh and cups his chin in his hand. Slowly Brian lifts Josh's chin up so they are both looking eye-to-eye. Josh looks as if he wants to say how desperate his situation has become but the words just are not coming. Brian releases his chin and pushes Josh so he's laying back on the bed. Josh doesn't protest, it's as if he were expecting it. He was willing. Willing to finally let Brian teach him a thing or two. When Brian senses no resistance from Josh he leans over and gives him a little peck on the forehead all the time maintaining eye contact. Josh is still laying there waiting for something to take him to the next level. He looks completely lost. As if he were waiting for someone to guide him to that next plateau. Brian is more than ready and willing to be his guide. He sits up at that moment leaving Josh motionless on the bed in the same position where he was pushed. Feeling completely enabled at this point Brian undoes Josh's zipper and proceeds to reach into his crotch. He begins to breathe heavily while his extremities become numb at the prospect of finally realizing his dream. Further sensing no resistance from Josh Brian slowly pulls his hand out of the crotch area and Just works Josh's pants off of him quickly but methodically. Josh's penis is still flaccid but beginning to stiffen rapidly. Seeing that, Brian quickly disrobes. Upon disrobing he grabs the bottom of Josh's shirt and pulls it up and over his head. In the process Josh sits up and begins to help him. They both begin to breathe rapidly as they contemplate the prospect of what's about to happen. Both naked now, Brian reaches into his drawer and pulls out his a tube of K-Y Jelly he'd picked up a few days earlier while contemplating the events of the day. It was the first thing he saw that looked like something he wouldn't have to explain at the checkout counter because it came in a rather clinical-looking box. He sets the box down beside Josh and proceeds to rotate him onto his stomach with his buttocks pointing up in the air. In his zeal he quickly removes the tube of K-Y Jelly, unscrews the cap and almost squirts half the tube onto Josh's ready-and-waiting butt. The Jelly feels cool to Josh as it hits his Butt cheeks and they begin to quiver as if to chill to the touch. It's not long before the Jelly warms up on his flaming ass and Brian begins to work it into the crack of his behind. As he's working the Jelly into Josh's Butt Brian becomes aroused to the point of no-return. He first smears the excess Jelly covering his hands onto his dry but erect tool. He then leans over onto his friend and begins to work the Jelly into his Butt and all over his Penis as the fire builds between them. Feeling as though he might come prematurely Brian begins to insert his throbbing tool into Josh's waiting ass. As he feels it go in Josh tenses up his Butt-cheeks and begins to squirm. Brian pleads with him to loosen up and reminds Josh how much Josh is loved and how much he means to him. Brian continues to repeat this as he drives his tool deeper and deeper into Josh's warm and waiting ass. It's about half way in and Brian cannot hold his load any longer. The sensation is just too strong for him to hang on to his load of cum. He begins to spasm and cum into Josh's Butt and repeats how much he loves his friend. This is the hardest he's ever cum in his life. His mind completely leaves his body as his load of cum completely fills his friend. As Brian cum's Josh grits his teeth and groans with excitement as this first encounter is both pleasurable and somewhat painful at the same time. But despite the mild discomfort of his newly christened Butt-hole he realizes pleasures and discovers erogenous zones he never knew existed. Brian slowly pulls his now empty tool out of his friend as Josh groans a sigh of relief as if cumming himself. For the first time, Brian is the speechless one as he lays beside his friend. They both look into each others eyes as Brian leans over and pulls his friend over to him. He looks Josh deep in his eyes and says "I love you Josh, I always have, and... I ALWAYS WILL !!!". Josh shuts his eyes and leans over in Brian's direction. Brian leans forward and they kiss and hold each other like never before. The Bridge is complete. Brian wraps his leg around Josh's groin as they share a passionate embrace. He reaches his hand around to Josh's Backside and caresses his friends Butt-Cheeks which are still covered with some K-Y Jelly and a little cum which exited as Brian did. He rubs the mix around Josh's Butt area as they continue to intertwine in the passionate embrace. They hold one another as they drift off in a warm and blissful sleep.
Part 5
Josh & Brian the saga continues...
In two hours Josh awakens to find himself in the midst of a very confusing situation. He lays there motionless for a while staring at Brian as he sleeps soundly. It's at this crucial moment when the questions come. What am I doing here? Am I Gay? Do I love this person that's here with me or have I just given into a lustful whim? As the questions come, Josh is all too aware of what the answers already are. He leans over to kiss a still sleeping Brian only to awaken him. Brian stirs and opens his eyes slowly to see Josh's face hovering over him. Are you OK ? He asks in a gentle voice. Josh closes his eyes slowly and nods in quiet affirmation. Brian puts his hand behind his head and brings him closer as they begin kissing passionately. First a peck here and there on the lips followed by open-mouthed French-kissing.
This continues until they both find themselves all worked up once-again. With the heat rising Brian works his way down to Josh's crotch where his throbbing tool awaits Brian's eager lips. Brian pauses for a moment to gaze at Josh's penis wagging back and forth like a fiberglass whip antenna on a 4-wheeler. Brian moves in closer and sniffs Josh's erection. It smells wonderful; the wonderful aroma of post-adolescent sweat combined with the fresh aroma of Ivory Soap. He works his way up Josh's erect penis like King Kong scaling a Skyscraper. At the top of his penis Brian pauses again as he contemplates swallowing Josh whole. As he thinks it over he remembers playing this scenario over and over again in his mind in the weeks went prior. He was unsure... Would he choke on such a large tool? Would Josh cum while Brian had his tool buried deep in his mouth? He looks Josh in the eye and reminds him just how much he loves him. And with one giant gasp of air Brian opens his mouth, relaxes his throat and goes down on Josh's blazing hot penis.
As he thinks of just how much he loves Josh, Brian is able to swallow Josh's entire member with room to spare. He feels Josh's dick banging on the inside of his mouth as he continues to swallow. Josh begins to moan and groan with excitement as his member gets engulfed in the warmth and splendor of his loving partner. As time passes Josh builds to an explosive climax. The cum in his balls eagerly awaiting its entry into the outside world. As he nears orgasm Josh places his legs over Brian's back as if to brace him and keep him from coming up for air. Brian begins to panic as he realizes Josh is too big to allow him to catch his breath while down on his king-sized member. Just at the moment of no return, Josh braces Brian harder than ever as he thrusts his dick deep into his throat and shoots the first shot of cum right into Brian's throat and windpipe. Brian begins to choke but feels the taste and aroma of cum deep inside him and tries to swallow Josh even more as if to swallow him whole. Josh continues emptying his sack into Brian's eager mouth arching his back and rising up off of the bed as the orgasm surges up and down his spine. He slowly comes down from the clouds as Brian raises up slowly swallowing every morsel of cum Josh has seen fit to give him.
They stare into each other's eyes but say nothing. Josh gets up off the bed and puts on his pants. Brian sits on the edge of the bed still savoring the taste and aroma of Josh's youthful, but plentiful cum still lingering deep in the recesses of his throat. As he prepares to beat a hasty retreat Josh turns and glances back at Brian who appears content yet bewildered as his friend prepares to depart his humble commode (I mean abode). As the front door closes, Brian falls back onto his bed and sighs in frustration as he wonders what the heck just happened.
Two days go by and Josh awakens to another one of his massive erections. He rolls back the blankets on his bed and opens his pajama pant's to free his imprisoned member. It springs out of his pants like a 'Jack-In-The-Box' eager to meet the world. He lays there staring at his erect penis while contemplating the frustration and conflict of his previous encounter with Brian. All at once, Josh gets a sudden urge to contact Brian. He slips his clothes over his pajamas and heads for the front door. In his nervousness he pauses for a moment to grab a bag of chips on his way out. Hurriedly, he gets into his car and pops open the bag of chips. Chips fly all over the front seat as he proceeds down the driveway, one hand on the wheel and the other picking loose chips off of the passenger seat. He pauses for a moment at the bottom of the driveway and glances over at the blue and white mailbox. The symbolism of the heart surrounded by the ducks on the mailbox makes him wonder about his fleeting heart and the feelings of love he feels for his friend Brian. He reaches over, opens the mailbox and takes out a letter addressed to him. It's from Brian.
The letter reads as follows:
Dear Joshua,
I just wanted to take some time to finally let you know that a change has occurred deep down inside me, unlike anything else I've experienced before. Basically, I woke up to reality one day, and saw how I've pretty much been an asshole towards everybody most of my life, especially you, and I've decided not to be the person I was before. Also, I wanted to tell you what an incredibly wonderful person you are and to thank you for toughing out one of the hardest times you'll ever have to endure.
Hopefully, you have already noticed this change in the way I've treated you at work lately. I haven't gotten mad at you, insulted you, or talked down to you as though you were just a snot-nosed kid.
As you are probably well aware, it all started when you were hired and our boss said he couldn't pay me, even though he could pay you. It was totally unexpected, and I got angry instead of handling it like an adult. I felt cheated because I was already working for him, when my replacement showed up.
If you recall, before you were hired, we got along fine the few times you stopped by the office and chatted. When you were hired on, I didn't stay friendly very long. I treated you like you were just some kid off the street that didn't deserve any respect as a human being. It was a deep-rooted resentment, both towards you and our boss.
It's pretty shitty looking back on it, seeing that I just figured you didn't have any feelings, and I didn't have to care about how I treated you because you could easily be replaced...or so I thought at the time. That's ultimately why I went to work for those other companies. It was totally out of anger, not out of a genuine desire to work for a big company. I just wanted something to rub back in everybody's face.
I know that you didn't really want me hired on at all last year. It's words like, "If he makes more than me, then I'll quit." that show just how much I hurt you. Yet, you tried to make a friendship with someone who basically wanted to be bitter enemies because of his immaturity.
Up until recently, I had the attitude of, "Well, if he makes a negative comment towards me, I'll give one back until he decides to stop playing this game." What I wasn't seeing was that each time I made a comment, I wasn't responding to you, but I was starting a whole new round of crap all over again.
Joshua, thank you for your strength and your overwhelming effort in trying to make this work out between us instead of letting it fester. I think you could see the human side of me just trying to get out, and that's why you kept trying to be my friend. Every time I look into your eyes, I see a wonderful person with a unique, caring sensitivity that just shows throughout your entire personality.
I used to have this notion that friends were only temporary, that you only had to keep a friend until you didn't need them anymore. It wasn't until now that I realize what a true friend really is, and you are definitely a true friend.
I feel no resentment or anger towards you or him at this point. That's a very big switch from just even a couple weeks ago. My eyes have been opened to the human side of life, and not just the cold and bitter business side.
I've been a very angry person in the past, and most of that stems from my childhood when my parents and I moved a lot, and I always had to say goodbye to my old friends and start over with new ones. My mom and I would get physically violent at each other during the years, which is why I was so bitter.
Now that I see what I've done wrong in the past, I will make every effort to be your friend as well. I'll stick up for you if someone blames you for something you didn't do, just like you have for me a few times. I do remember that, but I never actually took the time to acknowledge it before now.
When you quit your job, I was devastated. I really thought that I had lost any chance of us getting together, and that I would never see you again. The only way I can describe how I felt is that I was dead, in every sense of the word. I couldn't eat or sleep. My mind was just in circles.
When our boss convinced you to stay, I was extremely energized. Unfortunately, it took me a while longer to realize where I went wrong and how I needed to change.
I thought the best thing to do was change and let you notice the difference, and see that it was genuine. I used to be nervous around you because of my anger, and I was just afraid that we would eventually end up in a big fight over nothing. I didn't want that to happen, but I was too blind to see my own mistakes.
There's a strong feeling I have that you feel pretty strongly towards me, but only you can say for sure. I can only hope that's true, and that I'm not hoping for something that isn't going to happen. I really would like to know either way so I don't have to keep wondering.
Well, I felt writing this letter was the best thing I could do to pour out my heart without having to constantly stop and search for the right words to say. Please don't let this friendship go to waste. I don't think you will, considering all the effort you've put forth up to this point. I'm sorry for the shit I gave you, and thanks again for being such a great friend.
-Brian
Josh finishes reading the letter. He folds it and places it back in the envelope lying on the seat in the passenger's side of his truck. He sighs with relief as he ponders the relationship he and Brian shared just days ago. After a few minutes he "High-Tails it" down the street to return to the peace and comfort of Brian's apartment.