Just a Story
WARNING:
This is a story of friendship, commitment, love and trust. It is not a sex story. However, this story deals with love between two male teenagers. If you are offended by stories involving love between two teenage boys, please do not read this story. There may be some sex scenes in this story; however, sex is not the main theme. If you are under age 18 or 21 or it is illegal to read this story where you live, don't read it. Reproducing this story for distribution without the owner's permission is a violation of that copyright.
Just A Story
Chapter 7
Labor Day morning and the summer fun was coming to an end. This was the first time ever that I didn't care. I must be in love. I am in love! I let my mind wander back over these last few days. Life had changed. I was no longer confused or in denial of my own sexuality. I had met the boy of my dreams. Charlie is definitely a babe, which presented problems because…because he's going to be chased by every girl in the school and seeing as he is straight he'll find a girl friend and I'll be pushed to the back burner. God! Just the idea of it hurts. Life sucks! It really does suck. I wish now I wasn't gay or that Charlie wasn't straight! Well, I know he loves me…but for how long? He is so cute and so innocent and nieve. Oh shit! What if he tells everybody at school I'm gay! We've been so open about this he might think everybody accepts gays. You know it's funny when you look at it, all these words gay, queer, prick - we were both operating on different definitions! I wish homosexual had multiple meanings, but it doesn't. It would be funny if it did because then he might be, but really have the wrong definition so he'd think he wasn't, but then he really would love me like I love him and we'd be together forever. I gotta pee!
***
"You seem rather chipper this morning, my dear."
"I am. I slept really good, no nightmares!" Of course, I didn't tell her I'd had a dream about Paul and me. All I can remember was telling him I loved him and kissing him…Mr. Prick must have enjoyed it because when I woke up my boxers were wet with the white stuff.
"You and Margaret seem to be getting along really well."
"Yes. You know she works for one of our companies. From all reports she is an excellent manager and she's extremely smart business-wise."
"What thinking of replacing Gregory?"
"Absolutely not. I couldn't do without Gregory for running day-to-day operations; I really need someone to help with studying future trends and advising me on future possibilities. You and Paul seem to hit off well too."
"Yeah, I like him a lot, a very lot!" I sighed.
"I think he likes you a lot too!" she smiled.
"Yeah, he does. He loves me and I love him too except…"
"Except what?"
"He's gay as in homosexual."
"Okay, and?"
"And what?"
"And you're not?"
"Oh, definitely not! It really grosses me out to even think about what they do!"
"Well, you know he doesn't really choose to be gay; it's just the way he is and I hope you don't think less of him or put him down because of it. You know Gregory is gay."
"Really? I'm sorry I just cannot see him being gay, he always so fussy. I wish Paul wasn't gay, but I would never put him down; he's my best friend, you know."
"Isn't he your only friend?"
"Well, yes, for right now, but I'm sure I get others Paul will help me. But I love him as my best friend and he will always be my best friend. Life just isn't fair. It just isn't fair to me."
"Give it time, honey, someday you'll meet someone you'll want to spend the rest of your life with and life will be great and if not well, you'll always have H-F Industries."
I guess it's going to be H-F Industries and me.
***
I didn't even get to have a morning fantasy! I had just gotten back in bed curling up with my pillow and thinking about Charlie, who else, when someone knock on my door.
"What!"
The door opened. It was my Uncle Ben. "So, bud, tell me all about your new
love!"
"He gorgeous, cute, fine, hot, a babe, and he's not gay."
"I thought you said he was?"
"No. He said 'I guess we're a couple of gay guys' he meant happy. When he said he was queer he meant odd or different…but I still love him. He kissed me. On the cheek and told me he love me more than anyone, but that he wasn't gay." I sighed.
"Bummer, dude."
"Yeah. It really hurts when he says he's glad he's not gay. What am I going to do, Ben? From the moment I saw him I just knew he was the one for me, but now - now I don't know. I know I don't want anybody else. I know I will never want anybody else. I know I miss him when we're not together. I know he loves me."
"Hmmm. Well, if he's not gay. You're just going to have heartache after heartache. What are you going to do when he finds a girlfriend and it starts getting serious and he starts having sex with her? Straight guys do that you know and you'll be pushed to the background cause you're just a best friend not his lover."
"Well, maybe he'll change and decide to become gay if I really show him how much I love him"
"Now you're thinking! He'll decide to be gay just like you did, right?"
"I didn't decide it's just the way I am."
"Neither did he. Stay his friend because he needs you as a friend from what I understand, just don't expect more if he's straight. Anyway, it's time for you to get your lazy butt out of bed! There's a lot to be done! Oh, yeah, Uncle Mike called and said they'd be here by one."
"Ray too!"
"Yes. By the way, I haven't said anything to anyone about your personal discoveries. I'll leave that to you to decide who you want to know. Probably the fewer the better unless you can take the heat."
"Well, I took it last night from Charlie's butler. I might tell Ray, but no one else."
After I got up I found out that at least fifty friends and mainly relatives would be coming to the barbeque. Mom had started arranging things last night after we got home. People started arriving at ten; Ray and his family arrive at noon earlier than they estimated. I was getting really antsy because Charlie and Rebecca hadn't arrived.
"Are you sure Rebecca said they were coming?"
"For the hundredth time, YES!" mom said. She looked at Ben and shook her head saying, "Ben, do something with him! He's a hundred times worst than you were with Billy Young!"
"Whose Billy Young?"
"My first crush as a teen."
I blushed. They giggled. I left. I hadn't talked to Ray yet so I decided to talk to him. He was outside talking with his Dad. He didn't look too happy.
"Hey, Ray! Can I talk to you?"
"Yeah, whatcha need Paul?"
"Let's go up to my room," I said to him then to his parents, "Teen talk."
They smiled. Uncle Mike said, "Remember, what I said."
"Yes, sir"
"What was that about?" I said after we got out of hearing range.
"Nothing. So whatcha want?"
"I'll tell you when we get to my room."
"Oh." He looked really nervous.
As we entered my room I said, "What's up?"
"Huh, nothing. Why?"
"You seem really quite and withdrawn, sort of not like my favorite cousin."
He wanted to speak, but no noise was coming out and I could see tears welling up in his eyes.
"Look, I know about you being gay. Mom told me."
"I-I suppose you want to cancel the ski trip, right?" he said as a few tears crept out and trickled down his cheeks.
"Well, I thought about that before…" I couldn't help but smile and he knew I had something up my sleeve.
"Before, what?"
"Before I realized that I was madly in love with a boy named Charlie." The look on Ray's face was definitely a kodak moment!
"You mean your…Charlie…a guy…who…uh."
"Yeah, he's a real babe, I'm mean way beyond beautiful! He'll be here today and you'll see."
"Wow! So you got yourself a boyfriend! So-, do I his name is Jeff. He's a babe too!, Built!, Into sports, just ike me! Wow! I thought for sure you'd hate me or something."
"Yeah right! Look we've always been best buds I could never hate you unless you tell me your gay or something!" We started laughing. It was one of those laughs that is sort of a release of nervous tension then it turn into one of those laughs where there absolutely no reason to laugh but you laugh because the other person is laughing.
"So, tell me about your boyfriend," he said after we'd laughed ourselves
out.
Well, not exactly a boyfriend. He's straight."
"Straight? Bummer! You sure?"
"Yeah, pretty sure. He gave me a kiss on the cheek because he said he loves me more than anyone else and because I deserved it and because I listened to him, not because he's gay. Later he said that he was glad he wasn't gay. But he's not a bigot, I mean we're best friends and I know that he loves me, but not like I love him."
"So whom have you come out to?" he asked.
"Mom, Charlie, I guess Rebecca knows, she's Charlie's mom, Uncle Ben, you and that's it. No! John the butler knows, he a bigot. How about you?"
"Mom, Dad, your Mom knows, and Uncle Ben. That's it. You won't tell anybody else will you?"
"No. And please don't say anything to anyone else about me."
"I won't. So what about the skiing trip? Do you think your friend Charlie would like to come?"
"I was about to ask you if you'd mind. I haven't asked him yet, but I'm sure he will."
There was a very timid knock at the door.
"Don't come in we're having sex!" shouted Ray.
"Oh. Sorry." Charlie said in a quiet voice.
"Charlie? Come on in I want you to meet someone."
"Uh, uh, that's all right I, uh, I'll wait downstairs. I didn't mean to interrupt you. Sorry."
I sprang for the door and opened it. "Charlie! He was joking! He's the last person I would ever want to have sex with!" I laughed. Charlie smiled. My heart melted. We stood there looking at each other for several moments.
"Hi, I'm Charlie Harrington-Ford. And you are?" Charlie presented his hand.
"Ray, Ray Kendall, I'm Paul's cousin," replied Ray as he shook Charlie's hand, "Pleased to me you."
"Me too. Paul, I just wanted to let you know I was here. I have to help my mom bring in some stuff from the car - she bought half the deli!"
"Hey, we'll help you," I offered.
"Okay."
On our way down the stairs, behind Charlie, Ray nudged me and mouthed 'He's a babe! Wow' Of course, I blushed and at that very moment Charlie turn his head to look at me and then simply smiled. We helped bring all the stuff in and Charlie was right. His mother did buy half the deli. There was enough food to feed the whole neighborhood.
I took Charlie around and introduced him to everybody. I think this was the biggest gathering of our clan since my Dad died. I think my dad would have like Charlie. My girl cousins of course had their tongues dragging on the ground, especially Ray sister, Emily, she was like all over him like a bitch in heat. I was really surprised by my cousin Phil who is usually an asshole was competing with Em for Charlie's attention. We all sat down to eat about two. Ray, Charlie and I sat next to each other, me in the middle, and Em, Phil and Melanie sat opposite.
I was about to take bite out of an ear of corn when Em dropped a bombshell on me.
"So, Paul, is it true you're gay. I mean that's what Charlie said you told him."
Everybody stopped talking and looked at me. Everybody. Not a single word was being said. I totally froze. I had been outed by Charlie. Even Mom was looking at me.
"That's true. I did say that to you. So what's the big deal about being gay? I mean people are supposed to be gay, you know happy!" He paused for a moment, "Oh, shit! You thought I meant gay as in homosexual?" he asked Em.
Em nodded but with a smirk of disbelief. Under her breath she said "Yeah right, good try!"
"Em, I meant gay as in happy." I think Charlie knew the majority, including Em did not believe him. "Em, I'm sorry, I know you don't believe me. I'm just a stupid rich kid. For the past seven years I've had a bodyguard with me practically twenty-four seven. I was never allowed to watch TV; I don't even know what a Sony Genesis game machine is. I never had any friends until I met Paul. And then I met all of you - it's like a dream come true…I-I really liked you Em and everybody." He looked at me saying, "I'm really sorry, Paul. I'm trying to fit in, but I just seem to mess things up for you. I'd better leave. Thanks for inviting me." He got up from the table and started to walk away. I knew that he was upset because he had realized he had said the wrong thing to Em, but he'd tried to save my face. I was about to tell him to come back, but was interrupted.
"Charles Harrington-Ford. You have not been excuse from the table." Charlie stopped. I was totally surprised to hear Uncle Ben voice. "Charlie, I liked you the moment I met you. I think Paul is the luckiest kid in the world to have you as a friend. You are sincere, honest and a true friend because you are willing to give up having fun and to take the blame for someone else's obvious mistake. I think seven years of no TV, no game machines and no friends deserves a lot more. So as a friend, I'd like you to stay."
"I agree as a friend," voiced Ray.
"Me too!" said Phil.
And so on down the line everyone except for Em who got up with tears in her eyes and ran into the house. Charlie said 'Thanks' and then ran into the house after her. I wondered if I should follow, but decided he could handle it.
***
I knew as soon as Em told him that I said Paul told me he was gay that I'd done the wrong thing. I guess there are things I would tell Paul that I wouldn't want everybody to know. I did the only thing I could think of to save Paul. I felt really bad that I had done something that upset Paul and his face showed me that I had done wrong. I hope he will forgive me. Now Em is upset all because of me. She should have done what she did, but then I should never have told her. I followed her into the house.
She was in the bathroom.
"Em, let me in, I want to talk."
"Charlie, leave me alone, I'm sorry. I really am."
"I know you are, but why did you do it? To hurt me? To hurt Paul why?"
"I don't know. Just go away!"
"NO! I'M NOT GOING AWAY! Please Em, I want to be your friend, please."
She unlocked the door and opened it.
"Hi." I said.
She tried to force a smile through her tears. I stepped forward and pulled her into a hug. Then she really started sobbing. I didn't know what to do. So I just held on to her and let her cry for a while.
"Do you want me to go get your mom? Your dad? Your brother?" She shook her head 'no'. "What then?"
"Just you. I like talking to you. I like you holding me." After a few more minutes she stopped crying.
"I don't know why I did it, Charlie. I know Paul is gay. I know he loves you - it's so obvious. I know my brother's gay too. He hasn't told me, but I've known it for years. I love my brother. I know he just had a rough time telling my parents, but they won't tell me either. I just want him to be honest with me, I want him to know I don't care, I want him to know that I love him and always will, but he won't. I guess I thought if I outed Paul, he'd out himself just to…I don't know…"
"What's outed?"
"It's when something you've not told anybody about is disclosed."
"Is it obvious that Paul is gay?" I asked.
"God, yes! When he was introducing you around 'this is my very best friend'. The way he looks at you. It's hard to explain he's just different, happier when you're around. It's like Ray when his friend Jeff is around. And it's obvious you love him."
"Yes, that's true, I do love him, more than anybody else, but I'm not gay. Maybe it's me, maybe I'm just really weird, but I just don't think I could do the things gay guys do."
"I guess if you were gay it wouldn't bother you."
"Yeah, just wait here. I'll be back in a sec. Okay?" She nodded 'yes' and I fetched her parents and brother and ushered them all into the small bathroom.
"Don't come out of this bathroom until you are all communicating with each other" I said closing the door behind me.
Ten minutes later they joined us again. Mr. & Mrs. Kendall thanked me. Em gave me a kiss on the cheek and thanked me. Ray was funny he pretended he was going to kiss me, but then looked at Paul smiled and said I guess I'd better not and then said, " what the heck" hugged me and kissed me on the lips.
I was very embarrassed.
After eating there wasn't really much to do I thought it would be nice if we could all go swimming and suggested the idea to Mom. She said yes, so all us teens about eleven of us, piled into the SUV and head off to our house. Em was sitting on my lap and Mr. Prick started getting hard cause she was wiggling around in my lap. I tried to think of other things, but it just didn't work; he wasn't about to relax. She leaned over to whisper in my ear.
"I guess you really aren't gay after all," she whispered and gave an extra wriggle.
I really blushed. She giggled. Mom glanced at me. I blushed again. We arrived at our house and everyone started piling out of the car. Mom and I were the last in the car.
"Are you okay, hon?"
"Yes." I squeaked, "Yes. I'm…"
She just patted my leg and said, "Hon, it happens, just get out of the car nobody's going to pay attention and if they do, so what!"
Of course, I blushed again, but I got out. Mom took the group on a tour of the house. Em held my hand as we walked around on the tour, then I left with the boy to go change into our swimming trunks. It was the first time I'd ever seen a bunch of naked boys ranging from the age of 10-17. Phil and I were the only two who weren't circumcised. I still think Paul had the neatest looking penis and so did Mr. Prick cause when I was looking at Paul, Mr. Prick started to get hard which made me quickly pull on my swimming trunks and head out to the slide.
I think I made a mistake. Em told me that she loved me and I said I loved her too! And since then she hasn't left me alone! I like her, but she's beginning to be a pest! Paul keeps glancing over towards us, but for some reason he's keeping his distance. He's looking really upset. I can sense it! Every time I start to go over to him she pulls me the other way. God! She's really annoying me! I'm seriously starting not to like her. I got out of the pool; she followed. Why could she be Paul? He doesn't annoy me.
"Hey Paul! Want to play racquetball?" I asked as she maneuvered herself to my side put her arm around my waist and kissed me on the cheek.
"Why don't you just play with Em, you seem to be enjoying spending all your time with her!" he said then turned around facing away from me.
I knew he was angry with me, but it wasn't my fault. I felt really hurt by his answer.
"Oh, Charlie, would you teach me?" she asked.
God! Would she ever leave me alone? I had had it! I threw the racquet down, looked at her and said angrily, "NO! I don't teach! I play!"
I turned and walked away and went up to my room. I don't know what was wrong with me. I like Em she's okay as a friend, but I don't love her. I knew Paul was upset with me and for whatever reason, I felt really hurt and the tears started welling up in my eyes and trickling down my cheeks. I took off my trunks and wrapped a towel around me and collapsed on my bed crying. A short time later, I felt a hand on my back and looked to see who it was. It was Paul. He leaned over and kissed me on my cheek.
"I'm so sorry! I just thought you really wanted to be with her and I guess I was a little jealous."
"I love you, Paul," I said just above a whisper, "She-she just wouldn't leave me alone! I don't want to be with her. I want to be with you, just you, nobody else."
He gently stroked my cheek. "I will never stop loving you." He said softly.
I leaned over and kissed him gently on the lips. My whole body tingled the second our lips touched. After a few moments I pulled back.
"Wow!" he whispered.
"Wow!" I whispered. I was about to kiss him again when two of the other kids came in.
"Drat!" He said, "Well, come on get up."
"I can't"
"Why?"
I blushed. "Because Mr. Prick is hard as a rock!" I whispered.
He smiled. "Are you sure you're not gay?" he said in a whisper.
"Absolutely! There is no way I could ever urinate in your mouth! It's disgusting!"
"What!" he said out loud.
"I could never pee in your mouth!" I whispered.
He looked at me for a second and then started laughing. I mean really laughing hard.
Really, I saw nothing funny about peeing in somebody's mouth!
To be continued.
Footnotes:
Well, apparently, nobody wants to join in to give me ideas. So be it! Enjoy!
PS: write me at west_fargo@hotmail.com