Disclaimers: This story is a work of fiction. Any relevance to persons alive or deceased is purely coincidental. It contains love and sex between two teenage boys, if this sort of material offends you, or is not legal where you live, then do not read on.
Any comments or suggestions please write to IronFreeze@aol.com Flames will be ignored
Just like a Fantasy
I would like to apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I've had a lot of stuff happen in my life lately, and I just couldn't finish it. Thanks to all of those who read though. If you have any suggestions about where the story should go, please e-mail me at ironfreeze@aol.com. Oh, and minor point, I figure that maybe some people might actually want to know about me the writer, if so, you can visit my website at http://hometown.aol.com/ironfreeze/
Chapter 3: Fantasies aren't real
I had no idea what just happened, everything seemed so perfect. I looked over at Keith, his face was covered in this pain that I couldn't understand.
"What's wrong? Did I do something? I'm really sorry." I was starting to freak out.
"Is that all I'm good for, just sex?" He was starting to cry, I felt awful.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean.... I didn't think.... I don't know, I thought that's what I was supposed to do." I didn't have a clue what to say, I was very confused. I think I may have just messed everything up beyond repair though.
Keith was standing on the other side of his room, facing away from me. He just fell to his knees and I could hear him crying. I didn't know what to do, everything had seemed so perfect, now it had all turned to crap, and it was my fault. I got up from the bed and went over to him. I didn't want to touch him, I had no idea how he would react. I just sat down next to him.
"I'm so sorry Keith, I didn't mean to."
"That's all that everyone wants from me. Its probably the only thing I'm good at. I just want more, and I thought you might be different." There was so much hurt in his voice. "I guess you want me to take you home now."
"If its ok with you, can I stay?" I had to try and fix this, I just had to.
He finally turned to look at me. His eyes and cheeks were wet with tears. Here was this strong care-free guy, and he was so hurt. I didn't care if I lost him as a boyfriend at this point, I had to try and help him. I got closer to him and put my arm around him.
"I don't want just sex from you, I want you Keith. This whole night was just like a fantasy, I really have no idea what I'm doing."
"Fantasies aren't real, pain is real, and so is love, I think."
I just hugged him close, and he put his arms around me and cried into my shoulder. He was right though, this was nothing like a fantasy. I felt awful and good at the same time, awful because I hurt him, but good because I was helping him, at least I hoped I was.
"Are we ok? Can we be ok?" I wanted everything to be ok.
"Yeah." He gave me a slight smile. "Sorry for blowing up at you."
"No worries, as long as we're good." I smiled back at him.
We sat like that for what seemed like forever. Both of us were deep in our own thoughts. I was wondering what he meant by "that's all I'm good for". What could happen that gave someone as strong as him a sore spot that painful? And what was this odd feeling I had, it was like I felt full, and like he needed me. Was that love? Hell, I had no idea. I was starting to get tired, I think he was too.
"Keith, I'm kinda tired, do you have a blanket or something for me?"
"You can sleep with me in the bed if you want, just no funny business." He laughed at the last comment. Wow, he was resilient, he was just crying about this a little bit ago.
We both crawled into his bed, he kissed me on the forehead and said "Goodnight." I fell asleep quickly, I think he did too. Being emotional is very draining!
The next morning I woke up, I wasn't quite sure where I was. I turned over, and saw Keith's face lying next to me, then I remembered exactly where I was, it was just where I wanted to be. I glanced over at the clock, it was 8:30, crap! We had to be to the next day of band camp in like a half-hour. I kissed Keith on the lips, his eyes slowly opened.
"Hi." I said to him as I smiled.
"Why did you wake me up, I was having this great fantasy." He gave me a smirk.
"Oh? Was it a good one?"
"Yeah, there was this really cute red head." How sweet of him, kinda.
"Sounds like fun, but its 8:30 we need to go."
"Shit, I'm always late."
We quickly tried to clean up a bit, combing hair and such, then hopped into his car and headed toward the school. We smoked and chatted about what today's camp would include.
"Mr. Gordon is going to give us the music today, you have to start learning it." Keith told me.
"If I have trouble I can have you help me at your house right?" I winked at him.
"Of course, it might be really hard, you should come over often."
"I hope its hard to learn." We both laughed.
"Thanks for coming over Trav." Ugh, I hated the nickname "Trav" but it was ok for him to say it.
"Thanks for the whole night." We smiled at each other.
We pulled up to the school about 5 minutes late, everyone was already on the field. I saw Mr. Gordon coming up as we both got out of the car.
"So now your making the freshman late too? Your setting a horrible example Keith." Mr. Gordon yelled at Keith.
"I'm always late Mr. Gordon, but I get the job done, and I'm good. And lay off the kid, maybe he'll be as good as me too." Now that was bravery. I've never seen anyone tell a teacher off like that.
"Don't you turn into him Travis, or I'll kick you off this band so fast, your head will spin." Mr. Gordon was pointing an angry finger at me. Then he stormed off.
"Don't worry Trav, he's always says that, he's never kicked anyone off the band though."
The rest of the day was rather boring, it was just all of us freshman being forced to learn some song we've never heard before. It was awful listening to us all play. Mr. Gordon got so frustrated, he had the upper classmen play it for us, to try and show us what it was supposed to sound like. Keith, of course, got Mr. Gordon to yell at him when he broke out into a jazz solo in the middle of the song, which made all the freshman laugh. We had the same hour for lunch as we had the previous day, and Keith took me to subway once more, he was so nice. The rest of the day was more of the same, except Mr. Gordon decided we needed to march while playing the music we had barely even learned to play. After the day was through, I realized probably too late, that I had never called my parents to figure out if they were going to pick me up today! I rushed quickly to find Keith, I didn't see him anywhere on the field. I ran to the parking lot, and I let out a huge sigh, his car was still there. I couldn't risk leaving to find him, but I knew he'd be back to his car, so I sat down on the ground by his car and waited.
I waited there for about an hour, and I finally saw Keith approaching. He was staring at the ground as he walked up.
"Hey Keith." He looked up at me in surprise.
"Oh, hey Trav, what are you still doing here?"
"I forgot to call my parents to tell them when to pick me up, they probably think your going to take me home, or something, I should go call them."
"Mr. Gordon already left, want to come to my place again? You can call them from there." Like he needed to ask!
"Sure." I really wanted to say God yes you ultra hottie, but I didn't want to scare him off or anything. I could save that kinda stuff for later.
As we drove to his house, he was very quiet. His face was wrinkled up, obviously he was deep in thought. Something was really bothering him, I hope it wasn't me. I hoped I wasn't seeming like a clingy person going to his house again.
"Everything ok Keith?" I had to ask what was wrong.
"Ya." Well, that was a short answer.
"Your really quiet, are you sure?" Oops, probably shouldn't have prodded him.
"I'm just thinking." I figured I'd leave it at that, if he wanted to talk, he would.
We continued the trip to his house in silence. When we got there, he hunted down one of the cordless phones and handed it to me.
"I'm gonna go downstairs, when you figure out the deal with your parents, come get me." Maybe he was mad at me, this didn't seem like him.
He headed down the stairs, as I dialed my moms cell phone. There was no answer on her cell, so she was probably at home. I dialed home, and there was no answer either. This was kinda strange. I dialed my home's voice mail, sometimes my parents left me messages on it. I punched in the codes, and it told me there was one message. I punched the button to hear the message.
"Hi Travis, this is Mom. I hope you had fun last night. Me and dad are going to a party tonight, hopefully you can get a ride home ok. If you want to spend the night at someone's house again that's fine. I'll see you tomorrow, bye."
Typical of my parents, leaving me in the dust without caring whether or not I could get home ok. Well, since I'd figured out the deal with my parents, it was time to go get Keith. I walked downstairs and headed toward his room. His door was closed, I knocked softly, and got no response. I knocked harder, still no answer. What in the world is going on? I put my ear to the door, but I couldn't hear anything at all. I put my hand on the knob and turned, well, it wasn't locked, that was a good thing. I opened the door, and found Keith just sitting in his beanbag with headphones on, listening to something on his stereo. I decided to go the romantic route, if he reacted really badly, I'd know it was me, if it was something else, then I could be there for him. I walked up behind him and put may arms around him. He turned his head towards me very gently, he had tears welling up in his eyes. He quickly wiped his eyes and pulled off his headphones. When he pulled off his headphones, they also popped out of the jack on the stereo, and the music he was listening came over the speakers.
I will dance so freely, holding on to no one. You can hold me only if you too will fall, away from all, these useless fears and chains.
His eyes looked directly into mine, and started tearing up again. I had no idea what was wrong, but I squeezed him tighter and he put his head on my shoulder and started crying. The song continued.
Someone I am, is waiting for my courage. The one I want, the one I will become will catch me. So let me fall, if I must fall. I won't head your warnings, I won't hear. Let me fall, if I fall. There's no reason to miss this one chance, this perfect moment, just let me fall
The song ended, and we just sat there holding each other. After a bit, I decided I needed to know what was wrong.
"Keith, what's wrong? Please tell me, I want to help." He pulled away from me a bit, and wiped his tears.
"I don't know, I'm just worried about stuff. Mr. Gordon yelled at me today, told me I was a total fuck-up and an idiot and stuff. I guess I am, I can't do anything right."
"Your not a fuck-up or an idiot, and what an asshole Mr. Gordon is for saying that. You made me happy, that's something you did right."
"Then I fucked everything up last night, and today."
"I screwed up last night, and just because your sad doesn't mean the day is ruined. I'm sitting here with you, that makes the day awesome to me."
"It does?" He kinda sniffled and wiped his eyes, it was really cute actually.
"Yeah, it does."
We held each other for awhile longer. Then Keith quickly jumped up away from me and looked at me.
"I'm hungry." Now that he mentioned it, I was pretty hungry myself.
"Me too, whatever sounds good for you I'll have."
"Hmmmm..... you know what, I think tonight, we shall cook!" We? What was this we thing?
He grabbed my hand and dragged me upstairs into the kitchen. I was rather worried, the extent of my cooking knowledge was how to open the can of spaghettios and pop it in the microwave.
"I think we shall make spaghetti and swedish meatballs!" He was a little too excited about this.
"Can we make american meatballs, that would probably be easier." I laughed at my little joke, so did he.
"Nah, american meatballs are so small, swedish meatballs are big and juicy. I love being Swedish!" He winked at me when he said that. "Here's a pot, the spaghetti is in the cupboard, can you pop it on the stove?" He handed me a pot and pointed to one of the cupboards.
"Sure, are you making the juicy balls?"
"I already have those, but I do need to make the meatballs." He winked at me again.
He went to the fridge for hamburger meat while I filled up the pot with water. I was at least capable of making the noodles, it wasn't that hard. I started boiling the water as he was pounding at the meat and making these very large meatballs. I couldn't resist saying something.
"You must really like big huge balls." I giggled at my joke, as a piece of hamburger hit me in the shoulder.
"Damn, I missed, I was aiming for your mouth."
"You think shoving meat in my mouth will shut me up?" Another piece of meat flew and hit me in the chin. I picked a piece off the floor and threw it back at him, hitting him right in the forehead.
"Should I feel rejected? You throwing my meat back at me?" He smirked at that comment.
"You might want to keep it attached, otherwise it does no one any good." We both laughed at my comment.
"Beef, its what for dinner!" That time he hit me with a much larger piece.
The next half hour or so, we ran around the kitchen, waging 'The Wat of Meat'. Eventually we just collapsed into a giggling pile of bodies, with meat on us, the floor, and various other locations. He turned to me on the floor, and kissed me gently on the lips.
"Guess we should order pizza then, shouldn't we?"
"Probably, I don't think any actual cooking is going to get done tonight."
"We should take showers too, we're all 'meaty'." We both erupted in laughs again. "You grab the first shower, I call for pizza."
He ushered me to his bathroom downstairs, and showed me where the extra towels were, and walked off to go order pizza. I undressed and smelled my clothes, they were kinda smelled like meat too, hopefully Keith would let me wash them before I went home. I stepped into the shower, and let the water just run over my body for a bit. Every here and then, a little laugh would escape from me, I was on such a euphoric high. This was more than I could have ever dreamed of, I felt so awesome. Keith was the perfect guy, sweet, kind, caring, funny, and he liked me! As I started soaping up, I heard the door to the bathroom open.
"Sorry, its just me, I'm gonna go wash your clothes, I bet their as funky smelling as mine."
"OK" I hollered from the shower.
He walked out of the bathroom with my clothes, and closed the door behind him. Too late I realized, what was I going to wear then?
End Chapter 3
I really hate to end the chapter there, but I wanted to get at least some more of the story up ASAP. And once more, sorry about the lateness of the chapter.
Any comments or suggestions please write to IronFreeze@aol.com Flames will be ignored