Ken and I - Part 41
There were only a few more days before we'd be going back to school after our Christmas break. Like most kids, I wished every school break was longer, but of course I knew wishing didn't really work. I spent most of the day in my room, other than coming out for breakfast and lunch. My parents wondered what was wrong, but nothing was really wrong. I told them I just felt like reading, which I did for a while, but I could never concentrate very long because I kept thinking about Ken. I was excited, nervous, thrilled, scared.
The phone rang just after we'd had dinner.
I picked it up while my parents were clearing the table, "Hello?"
"Hey Martin, it's Ken."
I couldn't help but break out in a huge smile, "Hey Ken!"
"Do anything today?"
"Nah, not really, just vegged in my room. You?"
"We were out for a while, but yeah, nothing really either. So I was thinking", Ken said and then paused.
"New experience for you", I joked.
"Asshole!" Ken said, probably a bit louder than he intended because it made my mother turn and look.
I feigned shock, "Oh my, well I've never heard such a thing."
I looked and my mother rolled her eyes at me and dad just grinned.
"Anyway", Ken continued, "my parents and Jamie are going to be out tomorrow night, and they won't be back until late. I was thinking maybe ... y'know, you could come and stay over ... if you want?" Fucking hell, of course I wanted. Just the thought of it started blood flowing to my crotch and I turned to face away from my parents just in case I started to really tent.
"Well, yeah, that would be great", I said, and then shouted at my parents that I was going to stay at Ken's the next night.
"We're right here, and not deaf I might add", my mother said, "and how about a `may I stay at Ken's'?"
I tried to sound sincere without making it sound like I was a smartass, "May I please go over to Ken's tomorrow night and sleep over?"
"That's better, and yes you may."
"You hear that?" I said to Ken.
"Sure did, you're such a polite boy", Ken said, then lowered his voice, "not like when you're with me and such a dirty, horny fucker with a filthy mouth."
I tried to keep a straight face as I replied, "Yeah, okay then I'll see you tomorrow night. Around 7?"
"Yeah, that works, anytime after 6 is fine really. See yah then."
"Ok, see yah", I said and hung up the phone.
I took a breath and turned back to my parents. I helped mom finish the dishes and then went back to my room. I changed into a pair of pajama pants, put on a t-shirt and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. This caught my mother's attention and she was at the bathroom door as I spit and rinsed, and came out.
"Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"Well, it's not even eight, and you're brushing your teeth already?"
I realized that it must have seemed odd, "I'm fine, I'm just going to lay and read, that's all. That way if I fall asleep, I'll have already brushed my teeth."
"Hmm, alright", mom said, "as long as you're sure you're alright?"
"Mom, geez, honestly, I'm fine", I said with just a hint of almost-15 year old whine and attitude.
"Alright then sweetie", she said, and hugged and kissed my forehead before I had a chance to react.
"Mooom!"
"Okay, okay", mom said and smiled.
I went to my room and closed the door.
The breeze was cool on my face as I rode my bike down the path, but the sun felt warm on my back. I had no shirt on and was only wearing small pair of shorts. I didn't recognize the path I was going down; there were bushes and trees on either side of me and the path alternated between curved to left and then right so I could never see very far ahead. I didn't know when I'd left my bike, but I found myself walking through the bush and trees; it was strange because I still didn't recognize anything, but somehow it felt like I knew where I was going.
I was slowly moving on a swing, it reminded me of a playground I'd been at when I was younger, but maybe they all looked the same. I heard a familiar voice calling to me; I looked over and saw Daryl sitting on the next swing. It was hard to make out what he was saying, but I felt like he was telling me follow him. I couldn't see him, but I knew I was walking in the right direction.
I saw Ken going down on Daryl; he was letting Daryl slide the length of his dick deep into his mouth until Ken's nose was in Daryl's thick gingery bush. Daryl had a grin on his face. My cock was hard but for some reason I couldn't touch it; it was trapped inside of my small shorts. Daryl's hard cock slid out of Ken's mouth and I saw Ken looking up at Daryl to ask him if I was watching. Daryl laughed and nodded his head without looking at me.
Just off my right stood Mikey, the nearly twelve year old son of a friend of my mom's. He was pointing at me, laughing and saying that I had a boner. I looked down and my shorts were gone; my cock was so hard, the skin pulled back and the head swollen and purple. He was rubbing the front of his shorts with his other hand; I felt angry for letting a little kid laugh at me, and I also felt jealous that he could rub himself when I was still frozen. All I could do is feel my cock and balls pulsing with every heartbeat.
I looked up again; Daryl was on his back while Ken was on top of him. I could see Ken's naked ass rise and fall with every thrust of his hard cock into Daryl's ass. I desperately wanted to move; I wanted to shout at them; I wanted to do anything but stand here frozen watching the two of them. They were both grunting like animals as they fucked. Daryl was moaning Ken's name, telling him to fuck him hard and deep, the way that he always did. I knew how Daryl was feeling and I wanted to be there in his place. Mikey was standing right at my side now; his right hand was stuck down the top of his shorts and he was clearly rubbing and tugging himself. I felt something brushing my ass, between my cheeks and realized it was Mikey's left hand. I looked at him and heard him ask me why I wanted him to do that. I couldn't tell I was saying anything to him, and yet he continued to speak to me as though I was. He repeatedly asked me why I liked his hand back there.
I looked back over at Ken and Daryl; Ken was thrusting hard and telling Daryl that he was going to cum. I felt a throbbing inside my ass, the same kind of pulsing I'd feel when I was being fucked and near to orgasm. I knew Mikey's left hand had gone from just touching my ass to having his fingers poking into my hole.
I was still frozen, unable to move as my eyes slowly opened; I was aware of deep, powerful contractions behind my balls. Hard spurts of my creamy teen spunk were coating the inside of my pajama pants; my cock was bobbing inside of them wildly with each shot, the sensitive head sliding against the warm slimy fluid coating the fabric. I was panting hard, like I'd run a long race.
My breathing slowly returned to normal as my body began to relax. I pulled back my bed sheets and sat up on the edge of my bed. I glanced at the clock on my nightstand and saw that it was only 4 AM. I stood up and pulled my pyjama pants off; I could feel that the front of them were soaked with my semen. I balled them up and wiped jizz off my dick and balls, and out of my pubes as best as I could. I dropped the pants in my dirty clothes pile and pulled a fresh pair out of my drawers. I went to the bathroom for a piss before laying back into my bed and falling back asleep; I was way too tired to try to decipher my dream. I didn't wake up again until I heard mom knocking on my bedroom door to tell me that breakfast was ready.
A nervous energy kept me on edge for most of the day; I hadn't felt so on edge about going to Ken's house for a long time. I was excited that Ken wanted to see me, but I was also a little afraid: did this mean that Ken wanted to be more serious with me? I think what scared me more was that I was no longer as sure that it's what I wanted. It was something that had been in the back of my mind for a while now. While I wasn't sure that I was interested in being with just one guy, I was also beginning to think more about how I felt about boys I was with. The deep connection I had with Daryl as my best friend. The intensity of feelings when I was with David. The fond affection I felt for Colin and his shyness.
If I was being honest with myself, I didn't have any of those feelings for Ken. He would always be the boy with whom I shared my first sexual exploration and that definitely meant something to me. But that wasn't the same as feelings; romantic feelings - feelings of connection. At times I had wondered if I was in love with Ken. I knew now that I wasn't. Maybe Ken was equally confused - maybe he thought had feelings for me for the same reason. The question now was whether I'd be able to be honest with him. It wasn't that I didn't want to be friends with him. And as I'd seen time and time again, I didn't always think clearly when I was horny, and Ken definitely knew how to make me horny.
The ringing of the telephone brought me out of my thoughts. For a moment I wondered why mom or dad hadn't answered it already, but then I remembered that they'd gone out shopping. I ran to the kitchen and picked it up.
"Hello?"
"Hey Martin, it's uhhm ... it's Ken."
"Well hey uhhm it's Ken", I laughed.
Ken was quiet for a moment, so I asked, "Hey, what's up?"
"So uhh, about tonight ... I ah, I ... well it's not gonna work out."
"Oh", was all I could say.
"Yeah, uhh, so it's just that ... well, my parents aren't going out after all so ...", Ken stammered.
"But ... well, I mean I've ... y'know, slept over before when they're home."
"I know ... it's just, well ... it's just not gonna be good tonight, that's all. Sorry."
"Well ... what if you came over here instead?" I offered, not sure what to make of Ken's reluctance.
"No, uhh, sorry ... that's not gonna be good tonight either."
I wasn't sure what to say in response to that; despite what I'd been thinking earlier, Ken was still my friend and I had to admit, it hurt a little that he was calling it off, especially after he'd be so emphatic that he wanted to spend time with me.
"So look, sorry, but I gotta go. I'll uhh, ... well I'll see you at school I guess, okay?"
"Uhh, yeah ... okay", I said, knowing that I couldn't hide the disappointment in my voice.
"Okay, bye", Ken finished and hung up.
I hung up and went to my room and flopped onto my bed. I laid back and stared at the ceiling, not quite sure how to feel. I was disappointed, but in a way I also felt a certain sense of relief. I wouldn't have to wrestle with my feelings for Ken tonight, or lack of feelings. I really wondered what had made Ken change his mind. His parents not going tonight sounded like an excuse to me. It wasn't anything that had ever stopped us before. The longer I thought about it, the more it bothered me.
I decided that maybe watching some TV would get my mind off Ken. I went to the living room and flipped on the TV; I don't even remember what was on, but it was enough to distract me. I looked out our living room window and saw Jamie walk out, with Ken's folks right behind him; they got into a waiting cab and it drove off.
Ken had lied. He'd lied so that I wouldn't come over. I'd thought his excuse had been lame, but I hadn't actually thought he'd lie to me. I wasn't sure what to think.
I laid back on our couch, staring out the window at Ken's house. I'm not sure how long I sat like that, but at some point I saw Ken come out of his house. I saw him look over at our house, but I didn't think he could see me.
He turned and walked off down the sidewalk.