Lesli's Story - part 3
I was tired that morning. With only 4 hours sleep it was all I could do to function, but without a good excuse, I couldn't get away with skipping school. I didn't want to make my parents suspicious after all, so I showered, dressed in jeans and a sweater, and made my way to school, all the while remembering the episode last night and wondering who, if anyone, had recognized me. The bright lights had caught me in an extremely awkward position, but I kept trying to convince myself that no one would know it was me, on my knees sucking cock. The lack of sleep had me in a kind of fog and I wasn't really worried one way or the other. Funny how feelings can propel you along, rightly or wrongly.
My reception at school wasn't any different than any other day, and by second period I was convinced that nothing would come of it. I had seen Kenneth, briefly, ahead of me in the hall, but he didn't seem to want to talk, and I didn't pursue it. I hadn't seen David at all, but since he was an upperclassman, that wasn't unusual.
The first unusual thing I noticed were a few stares directed my way as I entered the cafeteria for lunch. And a few whispers as I sat down at the table to eat. I finished quickly and made my way to the bathroom to relieve my self. As I took my place at the urinal, two boys who were standing there quickly zipped up and left. While I was still standing there, two other boys came up to the urinals on either side of me.
"Watch your dick Johnny, she may try to bite it" he sneered, looking at me. I was mortified at the comment, the realization that I had been found out hitting me like a fist in my stomach. I felt sick.
"From what I hear she doesn't bite, she just sucks real good" the other commented, looking straight ahead. I quickly zipped up and ran from the bathroom, the shame bringing a red flush to my face.
I was in a panic now, how did they know about me? The night before ran quickly through my mind, and I came to the uncomfortable realization that I had been seen, and identified, last night in the road. How many people knew? What stories were going around the school? How could I have been so naive to think that no one would recognize me in the harsh glare of the headlights on Lover's Lane?
My self confidence left me like a bird in flight as I fled blindly into the hallway and the oncoming rush of students.
"Well excuse me" he exclaimed as I ran headlong into him, nearly knocking us both down.
"I'm....I'm...sorry" I stammered as I tried to regain both my footing and composure, still not sure what had happened.
"Oh my dear, I'm so sorry about what happened to you" he went on. It was Eugene - the queer - right here in the hallway, right in front of me, holding me up with his hands on my shoulders.
I didn't know where he came from, or why I ran into him at this particular moment, but I wasn't in any shape to do anything but stand there, stupified, as he looked into my eyes. I was frozen in fright.
"I....I....I...I" I tried to talk, but the shock had rendered me almost speechless.
"Now, now, it's ok" he reassured me, his voice soft and calm. "Just take a deep breath and calm down." Easier said than done. My pulse was racing in flight as I tried to concentrate on what had just happened to me.
"Check out the two faggots" someone remarked loudly in passing. The comment was wasted on me as I was still to keyed up to react.
"Bitchhhhhh" Eugene hissed, barely audible, the distaste evident in his tone of voice.
"I've .... I've got to go" I stammered, trying to gain some semblance of composure but struggling to gain control of the situation as I glanced nervously around looking for an exit and not finding one.
"Sure you do" he said "but you're in no condition to navigate by yourself" and with that he turned me around and fairly forced me ahead of him. Magically an exit loomed in front of us and before I knew it we were outside the school and headed across the broad campus toward the street. I walked along, unseeing, as we made our way to the street, turning away from the school and headed into a residential neighborhood. I was beginning to regain my senses by the time we turned into the municipal park. Walking thru the maze of paths leading from the center of the park, we came to the lake and walked along in silence.
"I heard thru the grapevine that you were caught in, shall we say, a very compromising situation last night with David and some other boy" he said. The reality of it threw me back into a hazy gloom. Did the whole school know about this? Was I, indeed, branded? My senses reeled again at the shock.
"I....I....I" I stammered, still unable to comprehend what had happened to me. My facade was shattered along with feelings.
"It's ok" he continued, calmly "things happen. It's not the end of the world, you know. It may be just the beginning." His words were lost on me, not even registering thru the glooming self pity I was experiencing.
"What are you talking about?" I struggled to say.
"Look, feelings are feelings. You have them, I have them, everyone has them. It's nothing to be ashamed of." His soothing voice was beginning to calm me just slightly. "Nothing you want to do is wrong. Nothing you enjoy doing is wrong. No matter what anyone says, it isn't wrong. Just one question, did you enjoy it?"
"Well, uhhh, yes I did" I admitted, embarrassed to tell another soul.
"Good for you" he exclaimed "would you like to do it again?" The question jarred me back to reality. What was he asking?
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"You enjoy it, I enjoy it. What's wrong with that? We can make each other feel good. Chase the blues away, so to speak." And with that his hand strayed to my crotch, squeezing me gently down there. I was shocked, but not at his pass at me. I was shocked that I responded to him, and before I knew it, my hand had sought out his crotch and I massaged him back. We stood there, like two animated statues, feeling each other up in the park. As I glanced around nervously I didn't see a soul. Of course not, it was midday and everyone was either in school or at work as we continued to enjoy the mutual stimulation of each others hand. Pulling me gently by the arm, he guided me off the lake path into the tall weeds that covered the ground until we were well beyond the sight of anyone coming down the path. He knelt on the grass and slowly unzipped my jeans, reaching in and pulling my dick free of the confines of my underwear. As I glanced down at the top of his head, he took my slightly hard peter in his mouth and began to suck me. He was good, damned good, and I soon hardened in his mouth as he continued to slide me in and out.
I moaned with pleasure as his tongue began to caress the soft sensitive underside of my cock head. My hands went, instinctively to his head, and I pulled him to me as he expertly worked the entire length in his mouth, sucking and licking and slurping.
His hands pulled me down to the grass, and we lay down beside each other, head to toe. As he took my dick in his mouth again, I reached out and unzipped his pants and reached inside to find his dick as hard as mine. I pulled it free, and quickly thrust my face forward, parting my lips and taking the head into my mouth. I licked the head as my lips sealed around it, and brought my right hand up to grasp the shaft. It was my third dick of the week, and the thought ran thru my mind that I was getting hooked on this. That was the last thought for a while, as I began to concentrate on the task at hand. I deep throated him, the feeling so good that I couldn't stop, and I felt the first spurt of cum rush from my dick. He didn't miss a beat, pausing briefly to swallow and press on. He literally drained every drop of jism from me before shooting his own load down my throat. It was sweet and just the slightest bit salty. I've since learned that every man's cum tastes slightly different, but this was only my third taste of it, and I nearly swooned at the sensation bursting forth in my mouth. I gobbled it all down, not spilling a single drop, and with in minutes he was drained, as we continued to lay on the grass, dick in mouth, and gently, lovingly, sucked each other to softness.
Laying there in the grass with Eugene's softened cock in my mouth, I felt contentment for the first time since my horrible experience in the bathroom. We had given each other pleasure, it felt right, it felt good. I felt protected, wanted, accepted. It felt right. Just like he had said.
"You like?" he said as he shifted position and brought his head up next to mine.
"Um huh" I whispered as I reached out to touch his lips. He wrapped his arms around my waist, and I instinctively wrapped mine around his neck as we lay, side by side, on the grass.
"Anything you want to do is alright. Understand?" he cooed in my ear.
"Um huh" I repeated as I nuzzled my face against his neck "Um huh."
We made small talk as we walked back to school, parting just before we entered the massive doors leading to the main hallway, having promised to call each other tonight. The haze came back as I made it to my seat in 6th period. I had missed a class, but it was the last thing on my mind as I relived my experience in the park with Eugene. The queer. Funny, I thought, it doesn't sound so bad.
The rest of the day was a blur, as I tried to avoid any further embarassment. I couldn't though, as a lot of people seemed to be starring at me as I walked down the hall between classes, several boys made snide remarks, and I could feel eyes burning into me as I sat in class. Pretending to be sick, I checked myself out of school before my last period and made my way quickly home.
Ah, home. Sanctity from my disapproving school mates. Once there, I rushed to my sister's room and rummaged thru her wardrobe and drawers, as I did most days. Then back to my room, where I stripped from my school clothes and put on my panties and bra. The black dress was wrinkled and dirty, the cum stains from last night prominent down the front. I quickly wadded it up and hid it under my matress. Slipping the high heels on my feet, I walked back into my sisters room and selected another, this one a bright yellow print, a sleevless summer dress that was cut halfway up my thigh. As I put it on, the excitement of last night - and today in the park with Eugene - all came rushing back to me, and I was aroused again. I carefully tucked my hardened prick against my balls and pulled the panties higher on my waist, securing my maleness between my legs. It hurt a little, but the effect was dramatic as I paraded in front of the mirror, no protruding bulge in front. I was feeling better and better as I slipped back into femininity, away from the harsh realities of school, away from the confrontation in the bathroom. But there was no confrontation, really, I had been insulted. I had been called "she". I had ran. But I had passively accepted the insult, I had not spoken up. I had not defended myself. Why? Why didn't I react to defend myself? Why had my emotions driven me where they did? I had no answer, but the thought took hold in my mind that I had reacted as I did because that's what was natural for me. After all, I had been caught last night doing something I enjoyed. I participated in events last night that excited me to the point that I couldn't say they were wrong. I had acted naturally. For me.
As I thought back on the comments directed at me today I began to realize that I wasn't mad at them. They thought me queer, which I guess I was. But, and this is a big but, I realized now that when I had been called "she" I didn't really mind all that much. I had reacted because I associated that comment with the guilt of being found out, not guilt at how I felt. And standing in front of the mirror, dressed in my sister's clothes, I felt a sense of victory. Let them call me what they wanted, I was safely in my own world now, away from them and away from their petty remarks. I felt good about the way I looked. And I started, slowly, to feel better about what I was. I had been called a queer today by people who didn't like me, and that had hurt. But I had found a sense of acceptance for what I was. By another queer. By Eugene. And the realization of what we had done together in the park seemed to make up for all that.
I called Eugene as soon as I could, before my parents got home. He was glad to hear from me, he said, and we talked for almost two hours. He told me what he had heard.
"Several people saw you last night. Were you really dressed like a girl, with David and the other boy?"
"Kenneth" I explained "He took me to Lover's Lane and David met us there."
"And you were sucking them?"
"Yes, both of them. First in the back seat of Kenneth's car, and then they made me get out and do it in the road."
"And you enjoyed doing it, didn't you."
"Oh yes, I enjoyed it. Til the lights came on, then I panicked and ran home."
"So you enjoy being a transvestite." he said.
"A what?" I stammered, not knowing what he meant.
"A TV" he went on " a transvestite. A boy who dresses like a girl."
"I guess so. I didn't know what you meant."
"Well from what I heard today, most people thought you were a girl. But someone recognized your face in the car lights, and David admitted it was you when questioned about it today."
"Oh god, that's why. I thought that might be the reason. What did they do to him?"
"Absolutely nothing. He's the hero, the stud, just like always. His reputation around school as a jock is the same. It's always that way, believe me. He sticks his dick in my mouth, or yours, and he's still the jock."
"And we're the queers" I laughed, the words didn't seem to carry the same shame I had felt earlier.
"Yeah, Leslie and Eugene, the two queers" he said. Somehow his saying that made me even more comfortable with the situation. At least I had someone in this with me. Someone who, until today, I would never have identified myself with. But from now on, I would be classified just the same as Eugene.
"You have to help me with this" I pleaded "I know what I did, and I know I liked it. But I'm going to need help dealing with the situation at school."
"I will" he said sincerely, and I had the feeling that Eugene was happy to have someone to help him thru it too.
The next day at school was a little better than the day before, but only because I was prepared for it a little better. I stayed to myself during and between breaks, not wanting to give anyone a chance to make remarks to me. Oh, I felt the stares, and I heard the comments made as I walked down the hall. Comments about the faggot that dresses like a girl, the one who dresses up and queers off, the sissy faggot cocksucker, were just a few I heard that day. Believe it or not, they all started to sound the same to me, and by the umpteenth time I heard them they didn't shock me at all. Could I be getting used to the attention, albeit nasty and mean, that was directed towards me?
I sat with Eugene during lunch, and told him what I had heard.
"Oh, I know it's hard to ignore, but don't pay them any attention. They'll come around when they want something."
"What do you mean" I asked, puzzled by his comment.
"Oh, these are macho big guys when they're around their friends, they do the same thing to me. But when they're alone, when they want it, they'll treat you nice. You'll be surprised at the guys who talk big about doing it with their girlfriends, but haven't really had anything. A blow job from me or you is better than beating off, believe me. I've had them tell me so."
"Wow, I didn't know if you did them or not. I mean, I've heard rumors, but I didn't believe anyone other than Kenneth and David liked to be sucked by boys."
"Oh, you're going to learn a lot, now that you've been outed. They treat me mean when they're around other guys, but when we're alone, they love it when I make them feel good down there. You'd be surprised who I've been with."
"God, you've got to tell me all about it" I rushed, wanting to know everything. I mean, the idea of being with someone other than Kenneth and David excited me. The idea that they would like me for what I did changed everything, it made all the nasty remarks bearable if I thought they actually wanted me to do what they were calling me.
Just then the lunch bell rang, signalling my next class. I hurried off, but not before making Eugene promise me that he would tell me more about who he had done in school.
My next class was math. I was good in school, it came easy to me, and as I sat there I could afford to let my mind drift off into my own fantasy world. I imagined myself sitting in class, in my sister's yellow summer dress and her white sandals, my legs crossed ladylike. I imagined that no one knew my secret, thinking me just another teenage girl in math class. Unconciously I crossed my legs like the other girls in class, and as I continued to drift in my imaginary world, my hand found my knee and rested there.
"Look, he even sits like a girl" someone near me remarked loud enough for me to hear. As I jerked back into the real world, I noticed several boys and girls starring at me. Then a funny thing happened. Rather than uncross my legs and recross them like the boys did, I continued to sit like a girl. As a matter of fact, I overplayed the role just a bit, pointing the tip of my left shoe at the floor, accentuating what I thought to be a feminine pose. They continued to stare. I didn't care. If they were going to tease me, I was going to give them something to tease me for. Actually, I felt comfortable sitting in class like that.
My next class wasn't a class at all, it was study hall. One of the football coaches "taught" the class, and things were pretty lax. He didn't require permission to go to the bathroom, and several of the boys who smoked were always ducking out of the library to go to the bath room to smoke. Halfway thru the class, I decided to relieve myself, more out of boredom than need. The bathroom was empty as I walked in, went to the urinal, and pee'd. Just as I was finishing, another boy from study hall I didn't know, took his place at the urinal beside me. I zipped up, and turned to go. Before I had a chance to take my first step, his hand landed in the middle of my chest and then he pushed hard. The force of it sent me stumbling backward and it was all that I could do to regain my balance as I slammed into the wall behind me. He was in front of me immediately, towering over my frail frame by at least a foot.
"You want some of this, don't you? You sissy cocksucker." He hissed, just audible. Glancing down, I saw him holding his prick towards me. It was large, at least 8 inches in length and looked as big around as my wrist.
"Look, I don't want any trouble" I started to plead.
"You do a good job sissy, you won't have trouble. You bite me, just once, and I'll beat your ass til you can't even get that queer suck hole of yours open." He frightened me. At the same time, the prospect of having all that dick in my mouth sort of excited me.
"Well, ok" I stammered and started to go down.
"No, not like this" he interupted, pulling me to my feet. "You wear a dress when you suck my dick, you got it?"
"I can't.....I don't have.....not in school" I pleaded.
"Yes you can. You will" he barked "you bring it to school tomorrow in your book bag, then you come in here during study hall and you put it on. You got that, you faggot?"
"But.....what if......I mean, we could get caught" I tryed reasoning with him.
"We won't get caught. You understand me? You're going to come in here during study hall and get dressed like a girl. And I'm going to give you what you like. Otherwise, if you don't, I'm going to kick your ass. I promise you that."
"Uhhh....ok" I answered meekly. What else could I say. What else could I do. He was serious and I was frightened.
"OK, be here" he spat, and shoved me against the wall again. I stood and watched him swagger out of the bathroom and back to class.
What could I do? He had made it clear to me that he would hurt me if I didn't do as he said. Could I really sneak the dress in here and do what he wanted? It was dangerous, what if someone found out? Found out what, that I dressed up as a girl, and that I was queer? Who didn't know that already?
A plan slowly formed in my mind that afternoon as I sat, day dreaming again, in class.
To be continued.
lesli99@hotmail.com