Life on the Farm

Life On The Farm**

Life On The Farm

Final Chapter (15)

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Written By: Justin Case

Edited By: Ron

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Disclaimer: This story is fiction and created entirely by the author. It is a story about gay teen love and you must adhere to the laws of your community to read it. This work is protected by the copyright laws of the United States of America; the creator retains all rights. ã 2003 JCPCo.

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Randy tossed and turned all night long. A constant nagging tormented the teen in his sleep. Nightmares flooded his head and gnawed at his subconscious. Sensations of falling off a cliff and visions of his flailing arms reaching out for twigs, branches, rocks, and other protrusions from the steep embankment flashed through his dream as he saw them slip past his gripping fingers. The young lad woke several times to the same dream, each time drenched in sweat. His short black hair matted to his forehead, his hospital johnny clinging to his skin, he finally tossed the flimsy sheet off his body and sat up.

His charcoal eyes squinted in the darkened room as he tried to open them. He slowly climbed out of the bed and felt around with his feet for the sponge-like slippers that he'd been given to wear. His small hands grasped at the brushed chrome side rails of the hospital bed as he tapped his right foot around under it to find the slippers. Feeling the soft squishy material under his toes, he pulled the footwear out by dragging his foot. Still unable to bend because of the pain from his healing belly wound, he wiggled his feet into slippers with a little difficulty.

He couldn't shake the fear that seemed to cling to his mind from his nasty dreams. Tormented and anguished at his not being able to confess his feelings towards Jim, he decided to seek out Joey. He glanced at the clock on the wall of his room; it read 10:15 P. M. While he'd only been asleep for two hours, he felt like he'd slept for days. As he donned his terry cloth robe, Randy felt some solace in the fact that he'd been able to discuss his sexuality with Joey and that Nurse Holmsley hadn't been judgmental when he'd told her about himself. At least now the young boy knew he could talk to people about how he really was without feeling shame. He also had realized that he'd have to be careful whom he opened up to, recognizing the fact that not everyone would be so welcoming of what he was.

As he walked stiffly down the tiled hallway past the nurse's station, he wondered where his life was going to take him. He knew he only had two more years of school and worried about the draft. So many other local Massena boys had gone to `Nam. Some, like Nick Primo, hadn't returned.

In 1974, college wasn't as much a priority and was often thought of as an escape from the service. Randy also knew college wasn't for him nor was spending the rest of his life working for Matty. Being in the hospital had given him much more time to dwell on his fears and he was never able to resolve them. Often he'd push them aside by watching television or other things would replace them, such as loving thoughts of Jim. However, now that he'd told two people what he really was, he was beginning to feel some comfort. It was almost as if a tremendous burden had been lifted from him and he was able to see things more clearly.

As he rounded the corner and headed down the hallway to Joey's room, he told himself `everything was going to be ok, life was going to take him where it did.' He was confident that everything was going to be just fine. He began to think about all the experiences he'd gained on the farm, especially the mechanical ones. He loved working on the tractor with Matty. There was something about the way every piece of metal fit together like a puzzle that seemed to make sense to him. He thought about possibly moving to Plattsburgh and going to work for the farm equipment dealer repairing tractors. Or maybe he'd remain near his mom and go to work at the General Motors factory in St. Lawrence. Whatever the strong young youth decided to do, he knew he was going to be all right. It was at that very moment that he let all his fears go and decided life was a journey on which he was only along for the ride. His near death experiences, his beginning to accept what he was, and the realization he wasn't the only one like himself suddenly came together with sharp clarity. Randy decided that, with the love of his friends and his mother, he could get through anything life threw his way.

He reached Joey's room feeling relieved, yet anxious. Randy knew in his heart he loved Jim and hoped that someday Jim would love him in return. The young man feared the worst of Steve. He'd known all too well how evil Steve could be. Yet he found some hope amidst his fears, hope that the relationship between his best friend and Steve would diminish in time. He also found comfort in the fact that Jim was like him; they both were gay. Randy reached his hand towards the door, took a deep breath, and slowly pushed it open. He peered in at Joey who was still awake in his bed watching television.

Joey's head turned quickly to see who was coming into the room. His face softened as he recognized Randy. He motioned his friend into the room by pointing towards the chair near his bed.

"Hey, Randy."

"Hey, Joey."

"What's going on?" Joey asked.

"I couldn't sleep. I kept having nightmares."

"Look, Randy, I'm sorry..."

Joey began to think about his own troubles, and the rejection Randy had shown him. All the little guy wanted was to show his friend how much he loved him. `Was it too much to ask?' he thought silently to himself. Hell, until yesterday he had thought his life hung in the balance and that his death was imminent. All he wanted was to love someone and be loved in return. Thoughts of all the times he'd been teased rushed through his mind. The aches from all the childhood insults surfaced as Randy sat down in the chair. His mind was filled with pain and anguish from the taunts and jeers he had suffered all those years in school.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Joey," Randy cut him off.

"I do, I do. I don't deserve you, Randy. I don't deserve anyone. I know that now."

Randy shook his head, rose to his feet, and moved closer to the bed and Joey's side. He reached out his right hand and gently placed it on Joey's cheek. His palm sensed the heat of his younger friend's body as he felt the soft flesh. He searched Joey's eyes with his own, his hand caressing Joey's face. He felt himself being drawn in as he lowered his face, tilted his head, closed his eyes and tenderly placed his lips on Joey's.

Joey reached his arms around Randy's shoulders and hugged him tightly. He wanted the kiss to last forever.

At that same moment, Jim was racing his car away from the gunshots. The 426 Hemi was rumbling and roaring as the '69 Charger flew down the gravel road and bounced onto the tarred surface of the Canadian road. The echoes of ricocheting bullets, shattering glass and Steve's screeching rang through the car. His five-foot eight-inch frame tensed and squirmed in the leather seat as he maneuvered the car at breakneck speeds. Jim gripped the steering wheel, his hands beginning to hurt as he kept turning his head to see if Steve was OK. His brown eyes kept shifting from the road to his lover, trying to watch where the car was going and search for blood at the same time. It was too dark to see his passenger.

"Are you OK? What happened?" Jim shouted over the loud noise of the revved-up motor.

"Drive, man, just fucking drive. What's your fucking problem, asshole?" Steve shot back.

That was it. Jim couldn't take any more. He was tired of it. He wanted his old life back. He wanted the simpler times of swimming with Randy in the Grasse River. Jim let up on the gas, took a deep breath and pulled the car to the shoulder of the road. As far as he was concerned, at that second, Steve could damn well walk. There was no way he was going to subject himself to anymore of the abuse and now even his life had been put in danger. He stopped the car, got out and slammed the door behind him.

"What are you doing? You fucking asshole, get in here and drive. They're after us!" Steve screamed from inside the car.

"They're after you, not us. I'm wondering if you got shot. I'm wondering why people are shooting at me. My car is all fucked up. All you care about is you! Well, go fuck yourself. Just get the hell out of my car!" Jim screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Jim, come on, get in. We've got to get out of here. I ripped them guys off. I got the pot and the money. They're probably right behind us."

"What? You did what? You ripped them off and now you've put me in the middle of it?" Jim screamed and quickly got back into the car as he realized the impact of the situation.

Jim was fuming. He was so angry his face went numb. He grabbed the steering wheel of the Charger and mashed down on the accelerator. The rear tire squealed as it left several feet of rubber on the pavement. His feelings ran between rage and fear as he sped off with Steve. There was so much he wanted to say, but he watched the road instead and kept checking his rear view mirror for anyone following.

"I'm sorry, Jim, I don't know why I do these things." Steve tried to apologize, but his real concern was the amount of pot he'd stolen because that's what he was looking at, the large suitcase filled with marijuana.

Steve had opened the case and was rummaging through the pot, smelling it, picking out buds, looking at them, totally involved with the stash, almost like a parent looking at his newborn baby. Jim glanced over a few times and noticed Steve's real concern. It was obvious to him what Steve really valued.

Jim thought about it and remembered all the times that Steve seemed to want to be with him or with anyone, it was because someone had pot. He began to recognize that friendship or love wasn't Steve's motivation, pot was. The only thing Steve really seemed to love was pot. He began to feel hurt, hurt that he'd been so foolish as to fall for someone because of his looks. It was Steve's looks that he was attracted to first and it was the comfort of the sex they'd had that kept him attracted. Steve was the first guy that Jim had let in, but as he reflected on their relationship, Jim realized it wasn't love he felt at all. No, what Jim had been feeling was an end to loneliness. The loss of his parents coupled with his discovery of his sexuality had been the cause of great pain for Jim. Steve seemed to sense that and took advantage. That's what hurt Jim now. He had allowed it, not only that, he had welcomed it. Jim had been so enamored with Steve's good looks and gorgeous physique that he had fallen for him and fallen hard. Then, when Steve initiated the sex with Jim, it was a dream come true. As he sat in silence driving the car, he began to wonder how he'd put an end to their relationship.

"Joey, I do love you. I really do..." Randy began saying, as the two young boys broke from the kiss.

Joey searched Randy's eyes for what was coming. He longed to be loved by Randy. He knew, though, that Randy loved Jim. He had always known it. He took a deep breath and listened intently as Randy went on.

"...but I really do love Jim and it just wouldn't be right to have sex with you. I hope someday that you'll find someone that you really love. I know you will and then you'll thank me."

It wasn't exactly what Joey had hoped he'd hear, but it was what he knew he'd hear. He slowly exhaled and nodded at Randy in agreement, but inside he ached. He didn't think he'd ever find someone to love or someone who would love him.

"We cool?" Randy asked.

"The coolest." Joey replied.

Feeling better, Randy looked once more at Joey in his bed and turned to leave. They each said their good nights and Randy slowly walked back to his room.

It was nearing midnight and Carol was worried. It was a school night and Jim was usually home by eleven. The robust woman climbed out of bed and looked out the bedroom window checking the driveway for Jim's car, knowing she'd have heard him pull up, but looking anyway, the way a concerned parent does.

She had never liked Jim hanging around with Steve. Jenny had told her stories about him. Carol had heard about the burglary he went to jail for. Carol picked up her glasses from the nightstand next to their bed, slipped them on her nose and quietly walked into the kitchen. If she couldn't sleep, she decided she might as well wait up for her nephew. The short plump woman wanted to wake her husband, but knew he had to get up early to milk the cows. She also knew he didn't need anything more to worry about. No, she'd just go sit at the kitchen table and try to do a little reading. Maybe when Jim did get home, they'd have a few minutes to talk about her concerns about Steve.

"He's not home yet?" Matty called out as she reached the bedroom door.

"I'm sorry, honey. Did I wake you?"

"Not really, I haven't been able to sleep either. Carol, he's all right. It's that other kid I don't like. There's something about him."

Carol thought about it, but decided not to tell Matty what she'd heard from Jenny.

"I'll wait up in the kitchen. You try to sleep, honey," Carol said softly.

Jim finally broke the silence. "OK, I'll drop you off at the dock. You take the boat across the river. I'll wait on this side for you to return."

Jim had done this many times with Matty. Matty's family all came from Canada. One of his uncles lived on the St. Lawrence River and had a small boat. Often Matty would use the boat to bring tractor parts and other essentials that could be bought in Canada for less money. The reason they used the boat was to avoid paying any taxes or duties. Jim wished now he'd never told Steve about the boat.

It was after midnight. Jim was tired and upset that this whole thing hadn't gone the way he thought it would. Steve had led him to believe it would take less time. On the way to the place, he kept telling Jim `just a little further.' Finally, they had reached the small house in the woods about an hour and a half later. The young man was happy knowing within an hour he'd be safely in his bed. He drove the car down the gravel road to the dock. They both got out of the car.

"I'll be back shortly," Steve called out over the sound of the outboard as he drifted away from the dock in the sixteen-foot long skiff.

The moon shone brightly in the early autumn sky. The stars twinkled against the black horizon over Cornwall that late September night as Jim sat on the dock, his feet hanging off and dangling towards the rushing water. The young teen, with the wavy brown hair, felt insignificant among the vastness of nature that lay before him. He listened as the water swirled around the dock. The smells from the manufacturing plants and their chemicals rose up from the water. Other pungent odors hung in the damp night air. The stench of the many decaying fish that dotted the shoreline washed in amongst the heavy metal smells that the stack pipes emitted from the various factories along the river. They assaulted Jim's senses as they permeated what was once a pristine place for recreation and drinking water. It dawned on the young teen how man, while truly minuscule in comparison to the size of the galaxy, could be so destructive in the name of progress. He likened his own situation to that of all mankind as he thought about the destruction he was causing in his own life to get what he wanted.

While he sat on the dock waiting for Steve to return, he pictured Randy's round cherub-like face at the time of his earlier confession. He tried to get a handle on what Randy had thought. It had happened so fast and Jim was very nervous. He wondered why Randy suddenly got sick after he had made his confession. Could it have been the truth disgusted Randy? He thought about how much Randy had meant to him and all the good times the boys had had together. Tears began to flow down his cheeks as he stared blankly into the water. Visions of his mother and father danced in the darkness of his mind. He quickly realized how he seemed to lose everything that was dear to him. Jim felt as if he were the cause of all the gloom in his life, almost as if he were some sort of omen. Thoughts of jumping into the water and letting the skanky river sweep him to his death began to fill his mind. If he were to do it, it would end his suffering he told himself. He leaned forward at the waist bringing his face and upper body closer to the surface of the water, tears streaming down his face. The sad boy remembered his mother's tender touch and wanted so much to feel it again upon his face.

The sputtering of the Johnson 65 horsepower motor could be heard echoing off the banks of the mighty St. Lawrence as Steve raced the small craft back to the dock where Jim was contemplating his death. Some of the murky water splashed up over the windshield of the boat and into Steve's face. He didn't mind as he was filled with excitement and oblivious to the small droplets of cold water that clung to his skin as they sprayed over the bow. He saw the reflection of the moon as it shimmered off the crests of the waves on the shiny blackened river as he drove the boat towards the dock. As he neared the wooden structure, he cut the throttle too quickly, slowing the boat much too fast. A back eddy rushed out from the banks and violently began rocking the small boat. Fear took hold of the inexperienced boatman and instead of riding with it, his body fought the movements the sudden change of direction the water had brought on, thus capsizing the boat and throwing him into the poison-filled water.

Jim looked up just as the boat threw Steve into the river about fifteen feet off the dock. He jumped to his feet and quickly grabbed the life preserver that was hung on the rail a few feet to his right.

"Steve! Steve, grab a hold!" He screamed at the top of his lungs in the direction that he'd last seen his friend. He expected to see Steve bobbing in the water, his arms thrashing about. Instead, all Jim saw was the boat rapidly being carried upside down in the current away from him. His brown eyes were riveted to the river's surface as he squinted and quickly scanned the river in search of Steve.

He called out again and again, but no response came.

The bright rays of the morning sun beamed into the hospital room window and Randy's body basked in them. The muscular teen shifted and turned his front towards the warmth that crept through the sheets and fell upon his smooth skin. It wasn't too long before his eyelids began to flutter, his long black lashes batted up and down. The strapping youth stretched his arms outward and arched his body as he opened his deep-set charcoal eyes. Next, he glanced around the room. No matter how many times he'd wakened to these surroundings lately, he was always a bit out of sorts. Taking a few seconds to remember where he was, Randy slowly sat up.

"Good morning, Sunshine," Nurse Holmsley's friendly voice sounded out, as she briskly walked into the room.

"Morning."

"Oh, have I got good news for you," the nurse beamed.

"Really? What could be better than tomorrow I'm going home?"

"I have a surprise visitor coming today to meet Joey. You know Judy MacLean? Well, her son's name is Scotty. He's a great kid and just like you. I was hoping they'd become friends. What do you think?" She looked into his dark eyes for a hint of some clue.

"Really? Are you sure he's like me? You know...you mean, he likes boys?" Randy asked as he moved closer to the edge of the bed.

"Yes, and he's been having a lot of trouble with it. Randy, I hope you're not mad at me for meddling."

"Not at all, Nurse Holmsley, not at all. I think it's great. I hope Joey likes him and he likes Joey. Joey needs someone to love." Randy's face lit up with happiness as he thought about Joey.

"Look at us, a couple of matchmakers. Now let me see your arm so I can check your blood pressure," said the woman in the white uniform with the funny little hat as she pulled his left arm out.

"How old is this Scotty?"

"He's your age, fifteen, maybe sixteen. He's very handsome and real sweet," the nurse said as she pumped the small rubber bulb in her hand and placed her stethoscope under the sleeve.

When she had finished taking Randy's blood pressure, Nurse Holmsley said she'd be back a little later and asked him to tell Joey. She was a little concerned that if Joey didn't know what was going on he might miss his opportunity. Randy agreed to tell Joey right after lunch. He had to eat breakfast, then he'd do his physical therapy, and as soon as that was done, it would be lunchtime. He also figured that he wanted to have a little while to think of what he'd tell Joey. The nurse agreed that was probably the best plan. It would also give Randy the opportunity to talk to Judy a little about her son.

A little while later, Randy was walking down the hall with Judy, his physical therapist. The walks had become routine exercise. He was excited for Joey and the prospects of Judy's son being a good match for his young friend. As they walked down the long hallway, he began talking to Judy about Scott.

"So, Nurse Holmsley tells me your son is coming to meet Joey this afternoon."

"Yes, I'm kind of nervous about it. I told him about Joey. My son is very special, but he's had some difficulties with his sexuality. I don't really know how to talk about it with him. I'm alone, my husband left us when Scotty was very young, and I don't know much about boys and stuff like this," Judy confessed.

"I think it will go fine. I mean Joey's a nice kid. We're alike, he and I, we both just found out about each other. It's hard to talk about, for me it is anyway. I mean it's not the kind of thing you tell people."

"Yeah, I guess. Scotty told me a year ago. He had tried to commit suicide. It was horrible. I felt so bad for him. I had no idea how much pain he was living with. He'd told a friend of his at school and the friend told everyone. It's been real hard for him."

"Wow, that sucks. I'm sorry." Randy thought about what would happen if other kids at school found out about him.

"I guess what bothers me is he's still Scotty, the same wonderful boy he's always been. He just likes other boys in a way that many don't seem to understand, but he's still a wonderful person." Judy's eyes began misting up as she confided in Randy.

Randy looked into her eyes. "You know, I guess we're taught it's wrong almost as if we're evil for being the way we are. I don't feel evil."

"You're not evil, people can be so cruel though."

"Not you and not Nurse Holmsley. I've never met anyone like you two. You're both so caring."

"Thank you, Randy. You are too."

After the physical training was finished, Judy left Randy in his hospital bed. Alone with his thoughts, he tried to think of what he'd say to Joey. He opted for the indirect approach. Just tell him that Scotty was coming to meet them and that he was gay. He figured Joey would be a little apprehensive if he thought Scotty was coming to meet him only, but would soon get over his shyness if he thought Scotty was there to meet the both of them. Randy was hopeful it would go well and the two boys would become fast friends.

As soon as he was finished with his lunch, Randy headed for Joey's room. Armed with his big smile and positive attitude, he walked right into Joey's room. Joey was watching television, but he shut it off as soon as he saw Randy.

"You look all happy. What's up?" Joey quipped.

"I've got some good news for you."

"Oh, yeah? What is it?"

"You know my physical therapist, Judy MacLean?"

"Kind of."

"OK, let me explain. You know Nurse Holmsley. Well, I told her about me and the way I felt about Jim."

"Really, Randy, you did?"

"Yeah, she's really understanding and I was really hurting. Well, I told her about me. I guess she saw us last night and how upset we both were and figured things out."

"You mean she knows about me? Oh no, Randy, please tell me she doesn't know. My parents would die."

"Don't worry, Joey, she's not going to say anything to your parents, she's really cool. As a matter of fact, she talked to Judy about it. Judy's son is like us, and he's coming here this afternoon to meet us."

"Why is he coming to meet us?" Joey was totally confused and beginning to get a little scared.

"I guess he's had some real problems. Some kids at his school found out about him and he's in a rough way. You don't want to help me with him?" Randy pushed on.

"Help you? Help you how?"

"The kid has no friends. I guess he felt so bad he tried to kill himself," Randy explained.

"Oh no, Randy, that's terrible. Sure, I'll help. I wonder if he's cute," Joey mused.

"Oh, that would great, everyone would have a boy friend except me. Thanks a lot, Joey," Randy teased.

"You had your chance, buster," Joey teased back.

"Yeah, I know, Joey, and I do love you as a friend."

"I understand, Randy. I love you too."

A few hours later, a handsome young man was visiting our two patients. His name was Scotty MacLean. He stood just less than six feet tall. He was adorned with light golden brown hair, sparkling green eyes, and a very sexy smile. Scotty seemed very shy but soon warmed up to his newfound friends. The three boys talked about school and their favorite things. Scotty seemed to take a particular interest in Joey. Of course, Randy helped that along.

"I'm really tired, you guys. I think I'll leave you two lovebirds alone. I'll be back later. Don't do anything I wouldn't," Randy smiled and quickly left the room.

"What did he mean by that?" Scotty asked Joey.

"Oh, he's teasing me."

"About what?"

"I think he knows I have a crush on you," Joey blurted out.

"You mean you're gay?"

"Yeah."

"Me too."

Scotty and Joey spent the rest of the afternoon getting to know each other. It was the first time in months the two boys felt so comfortable with themselves. The time seemed to fly by for both of them as they joked and chatted. It was the beginning of a long and wonderful relationship for the two of them.

The next day, Jim found himself sitting at the kitchen table with Carol and Matty. It was dreadful for Jim. He had come home from his escapades with Steve drenched to the bone, two nights earlier. Matty hadn't spoken to him since he'd come home. Carol was mildly pleasant. He knew he needed to talk to them both because he wanted to have a few people over that evening when Randy came home. Jim knew he had some explaining to do.

"Uncle Matty, Aunt Carol, I'm really sorry. I made some poor choices. I won't let it happen again."

"Jim, look, this boy Steve is trouble. I don't want him around here anymore. Is that understood? I'm not going to talk about this again. I don't want that boy on my property, period."

"Yes, sir."

"Jim, what Matty is saying is that he cares about you and we're afraid this boy will do more things like this and drag you down with him. We love you, Jim." Carol got up from her chair at the table and walked over to Jim and gave him a hug.

"I love you guys too. I'm so sorry."

"Randy will be home today, spend more time with him. I've known that boy since he was knee high to a grasshopper," Matty said his piece and left the two at the table.

"He's right, Jim. I've heard some things in town about Steve. He's real trouble," Carol told her nephew.

"Yeah, I know. I'll just stick with Randy, Tom and the gang."

Jim hadn't told his aunt and uncle the entire story. He hadn't told them about the marijuana. He just told them that Steve had robbed some people in Canada and that he had no idea it was going to happen. Jim had also told them how they used Matty's uncle's boat to bring the stolen goods across the boarder. Neither Carol nor Matty asked what Steve had stolen. Jim told them how the boat capsized and how he'd had to jump into the cold murky water to save Steve.

The young teen didn't tell his aunt or uncle what he'd told Steve that night. Jim told him he never wanted to see him again. Steve begged for forgiveness and actually cried. He insisted he needed Jim's help. Jim told him he didn't have the strength. Steve even tried to bribe Jim with some of the money and the pot. It just hurt Jim more to find out how shallow Steve really was.

"So, are you going to have a welcome home party for Randy?" Carol asked Jim, bringing him back to the present.

"Yes, ma'am, if it's OK."

"Of course, Jim. I'll even bake a chocolate cake, his favorite. You can take it up to the cabin." She hugged her nephew again.

Just then the telephone rang, startling both of them. Jim got up to answer it.

"Hello."

"Hey, man, it's me. I'm ready to be discharged and I was hoping you could come pick me up." Randy's voice sounded so sweet to Jim.

"You want me to come get you? You sure?"

"Of course, you're my best friend."

"Still?"

"Why wouldn't you be?" Randy wondered.

"I don't know, we'll talk about it when I get there. Give me a few. I've got to ask Carol if I can use her van. My car is in the shop getting a new back window."

"OK, I'll be waiting."

Jim quickly asked Carol if he could use the van to go pick up Randy. He was nervous because he hadn't talked to Randy since he'd made his confession. He had been too scared to go back to see Randy since. Although he was a little frantic about seeing his best friend, he was also happy that Randy had called. It let Jim know that they were still friends. Jim left a few minutes later in Carol's van. The drive to the hospital took only a few minutes. Jim was at Randy's bedside about a half-hour after the phone call.

"Where's Steve? You didn't bring him?" Randy asked rather perplexed.

"Oh no, it's a long story. The short version is I won't be seeing him anymore."

"Really??" Randy's voice was filled with excitement, perhaps a little too much, so he toned down his reaction. "Oh, I mean, I'm sorry."

"It's OK. I didn't think you'd ever call me again," Jim admitted.

"Why?"

"I thought you hated me, for being... you know, like that. I mean the way you got sick all of a sudden after I told you," Jim explained.

"No, not at all, Jim. I've been wanting to tell you about me being gay too for a long time. I was just so jealous of Steve."

"You're kidding, you're gay too?" Jim was totally unprepared for Randy's confession.

"Yeah, I've kept it to myself until I wound up in here. I got to talking to one of the nurses, she's really cool. I told her. I have something else to tell you too." Randy smiled at Jim, grabbed his bag of clothing and nodded towards the door. "Let's get out of here."

Jim took the bag from Randy. "Let me carry this for you."

"You're quite a gentleman, Mr. Jim."

"Thanks."

"I love you, Jim. I hope that someday you can love me the way you did Steve."

"I already do, Randy, I already do. I love you more."

Randy smiled at Jim as the two walked silently out of the hospital to the van. The afternoon sun was shining high above their heads. Its warmth radiated through their clothing. As they reached the van, Randy looked into Jim's brown eyes and smiled.

"What?" Jim asked.

"Did you bring any pot? I haven't smoked since I got here."

"As a matter of fact I did."

"Let's take a ride out to the river so we can be alone a little bit. Please, Jim?"

"Sure."

As Jim drove the Chevy van towards the farm, the two boys smoked a joint while they listened to Moody Blues playing "Knights in White Satin" on the radio. Jim kept looking over at Randy and smiling at him. Randy told Jim all about Joey and Scotty. He told him about Nurse Holmsley and all the things she had said too. Jim was surprised that Joey was gay too, but he was glad that he had found someone as nice as Scotty.

Jim turned the van onto the dirt road that led to the Grasse River and parked it so they could walk down to the bank. The young boy with the curly brown hair looked at his best friend, their eyes locked on each other. Jim couldn't resist the tenderness he felt for Randy and leaned closer to him, kissing him gently on the lips.

"I really love you, Randy."

"I love you too, Jim," Randy told him, then kissed Jim again.

"I felt so used by Steve, Randy. He hurt me bad."

"I'm sorry, Jim. I'll never hurt you."

"I'll never hurt you either, Randy."

The two boys embraced each other and began kissing one another tenderly. Jim squeezed his arms around Randy and held him tightly. In his mind, it was almost as if some flood gates had been opened. He felt so comfortable with Randy in his arms. His heart began to race, his body filled with desires. It was almost like coming home after a long journey, the welcome feeling of being where you've longed to be.

Randy felt it too. He'd never experienced the feelings of another's lips on his own except that of his mother and Joey. This was so different. It was as if he had become one with Jim, as if their two bodies melted into each other. He reached his hands around Jim's head and pulled him closer as they continued to kiss.

Jim climbed out of his seat and got on his knees next to Randy. He looked into Randy's dark eyes and smiled. Jim ran his hands up Randy's thighs towards his waist and slowly began tugging Randy's shirt up his torso and over his head. Randy lifted his arms letting Jim remove the shirt over his head, then nudged at Jim's body, suggesting they move to the back of the van. Jim slowly took Randy by the hand. Randy crawled out of his seat and followed Jim to the rear of the vehicle.

When the two had settled on the floor side by side, Randy reached his hands under Jim's shirt and removed it. The two boys lay on the carpeted floor of the van, naked from the waist up, their hands exploring each other's smooth torsos, while their tongues danced in each other's mouths. Not another word was spoken.

Slowly, Randy slid one of his hands down Jim's belly towards his belt buckle and he began to fumble around in an attempt to undo it. Jim's hand did the same to Randy's. In a few seconds, both boys were slipping each other's dungarees off as they continued fondling each other and kissing. Lying next to each other, clad only in their white cotton briefs and filled with passion, the two young teens pressed their bodies closer to one another. Their hard dicks pressed firmly against the fabric of their underwear as the two boys began pumping their bodies in unison, creating friction on each other's hardened members.

Jim kissed Randy all over, beginning with small kisses on his neck, then down his chest, finally resting his mouth on Randy's right nipple. Randy followed suit and began sucking and nibbling on one of Jim's nipples too. Their hands began roaming over each other's smooth muscular bodies, pinching and rubbing. Jim slid his hand down Randy's sides and his fingers roamed inside Randy's briefs. Randy lifted his hips off the floor while Jim slid the last of Randy's clothing down his legs and off his body. Randy did the same to Jim and a few moments later both boys lay naked on their sides clinging to one another in sheer passion. The sensations were too great and they both came as their hard cocks rubbed against one another.

For the first time in both their lives, they had truly made love with another human being. It was not the last time, but only the beginning of a long journey the two were to make. And to think, it all began simply as life on the farm.

The End

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**

That's all, folks. I hope you enjoyed it. I certainly did. If you'd like to write me your comments, send them to Justin69SK@aol.com. I love getting feedback.

Just,

Justin