Chapter Ten: I Walk Alone On The Road That Always Leads Home.
"What a freaking week this has been" Drew moaned as he took a long stretch at the cafeteria table.
"I'm just glad the rumors about you two have stopped" Joanne replied. "As usual the teenagers have found other things to amuse themselves with."
"It's too bad that the gang broke apart though." Justin said with a sigh as he picked over his food. "I may not have been here long, but even I know that you guys were all really close, and that has been shattered now."
"Joel, and Rob just didn't feel comfortable sitting with us while those rumors were being tossed around, and I don't blame them, would you want to be associated with people who were accused of murder? As for Jake and Ryan, they seem to be dicks and just ditched us because Matt is gone..." Drew stopped for a moment to think, "But why did Chris leave?" He asked to himself.
"He didn't say why he wouldn't sit with us anymore, just that he wasn't going to" Melissa said as she pushed her short blonde hair behind her ears. "Anyways, you still have Joanne, Katie and I. As well as Justin and Nate," She smiled.
"Speaking of Justin and Nate" Joe grinned. "Are you two going on a date anytime soon?" She giggled and stared at them, waiting for an answer.
Nate maneuvered in his seat uncomfortably and looked at Justin. Justin looked back at him and gave a smile, "Nate and I have no plans for a date just yet, we really didn't know what we wanted to do, but he is coming over tonight"
"Introducing him to mommy?" Drew laughed.
"Actually yes... you wouldn't believe how excited she was when she heard about Nate." Justin rolled his eyes.
"Yes I would..." Drew winked. "By the way, just how did you two start dating? I don't remember this! It's like it just happened"
"It did...remember the day we met Nate?" Justin asked.
"Yes"
"Well the following day when we were talking before class he said that he was so glad to know that there was someone else like himself, that he didn't feel so alone anymore."
"Wait, you're telling me that you two started dating the day after you met?" Joe interrupted.
"...Yes. Why?"
"Just asking." She said raising a hand at Justin.
"Anyways, Long story short, I asked him if he wanted to go out with me. I don't know exactly why, but I found myself saying those words without thinking" Justin finished.
"Ok, now that we heard the short version, give us the details in between" Melissa said.
"That's not up to me, its up to Nate." Justin replied.
"It's alright, you can tell them" Nate spoke up.
Justin sighed. "Alright. We were in the lobby at the bench I sit at and draw sometimes. He was telling me about his old school, a very anal school at that. There was no GSA club or anything to ease the gay population, so everyone was closeted. Nate felt really shitty pretending to be something he wasn't and finally had to leave. He figured a new school would change a few things and managed, somehow, to get his parents to move. Like me he felt isolated and dead inside for a long time, and when I finally told him I was gay the day before, he was relieved." Justin stopped for a second to take a drink of milk before continuing, "He told me that morning that he liked me. He didn't understand how, just that he liked my company and that was good enough for me."
"I was in rough shape even though I didn't show it when I first met you two" Nate intervened. "To tell you the truth, knowing that not only Justin was gay, but that he had a straight, guy best friend really made me feel great, that there was some ounce of hope left. I couldn't help myself that morning I just had to touch Justin; I had to be close in some way so I gave him a long tight hug. And thankfully he reciprocated, which made me feel great."
"It was when I was in that hug that I realized he knew exactly how I felt and I understood what he wanted. He isn't looking for sex... well... not just sex; he wants a relationship with someone, like me. So I asked him if he wanted to go out with me." Justin took another sip of his milk.
"That was the gayest story you have ever told" Melissa joked.
"Why thank you" Justin replied sticking his tongue out at her.
"I'm happy for you two" Drew grinned.
"What?" Justin asked suspiciously.
"Nothing"
"What?!"
"You think he's sexy, you want to sack him!" Drew sang.
Justin stood up and walked over to the other side of the table slowly, running his hand across the hard surface as he went. He stopped in front of Drew and gave a wicked grin before grabbing Drew's face in his hands and embracing him in a kiss. Justin moaned lightly as he worked Drew's lips a little harder before breaking the kiss. "I'm sorry, Drew, it just won't work out with us" He said walking back to the other side of the table, "You're just going to have to accept it. That was the first and only kiss you can get or have from me"
"You... You kissed me!" Drew exclaimed.
"It was platonic, Drew. Nothing more. I took pity on you and figured you should at least know what you're missing out on" Justin said as he took his seat again and wrapped an arm around Nate's shoulder, massaging his neck lightly.
When the bell went at the end of the day and school was once again out for the weekend, everyone stormed out of the school like a heard of bulls. Justin stood at his locker, Nate beside him and packed his things slowly into his backpack. "I think I might have made Drew irritated" He said to Nate.
"No, I think you just shocked him. It certainly shocked me" Nate replied with a laugh.
"Maybe. But I did lie to him too. That wasn't the first time I kissed him." Justin sighed. "I really should tell him the truth, that when he slept over at my place I kissed him in his sleep. I know I shouldn't have now, But at the time I couldn't help it"
"Why did you do that?" Nate asked, cocking his head to the side.
Justin looked at him and smiled. He really loved those shot curly locks of red hair and those deep enticing eyes. "I'll tell you on the way home, ok? Oh, we have to walk home cause I just made us miss the bus." Justin said as he looked at a clock down the hallway.
"Not a problem" Nate replied as he moved in close to Justin and, placing one arm around Justin's waist, pulled him in and kissed him. It was a slow, passionate kiss, Nate's first ever. He felt the moist lips that were as soft as a marshmallow and very sweet, using his tongue he opened a crack between Justin's lips and started to massage the inside of the mouth. Nate hesitated for a moment and then pulled back, releasing Justin from the ecstasy.
"Why did you stop?" Justin asked sadly.
"Because that was my first kiss ever... It felt... good but weird too" Nate responded. "I don't mean that in a bad way, just... I don't know"
"I do. You are still afraid of what people would think if they saw us kissing" Justin ran his hand down Nate's face and smiled. "If anyone has a problem with it, we can just start making out"
"Haha, well I'm not sure I'm ready for that just yet"
Drew sat on the bus with Melissa as the long journey home began, he was tired and very bored, still thinking about the kiss he got from Justin a few hours ago. To get his mind off of it he turned to Melissa and asked her about the dream he had, knowing she was heavier into it then Justin was.
"Well if you want my personal opinion," She said, "I think it's more of a premonition then anything you are currently feeling. For example, you were on a road, which represents your life in its entirety. By standing in the direction of your future, it suggest that there will be more anxiety in the future."
"Wow, I so did not know you were that into this sorta thing! You're going to make me actually think about this, aren't you?" Drew jested.
"Something you don't do enough of" Melissa reciprocated
"Thanks" Drew replied sarcastically.
"Anyways, I really think this is about something that's going to happen. And it really does have you worried."
"If I'm worried about something that I don't know about yet, then how can I be worried at all?"
"The mind works in mysterious way, dear" She patted him on the leg and stood up to get off the bus. "Have a good weekend," She yelled as she ran down the steps of the bus.
"You too" He said quietly, watching her run down the road to her house.
"Ok spill" Nate said. "Tell me why you kissed Drew in his sleep"
"At the time I was really into him. I loved him, I mean, I still do. I just don't love him like I used to. When he was laying there beside me, I couldn't stop thinking about him, and the more I thought about him the more I thought about being... intimate..."
"Is there still a possibility that you do still love him in that way?" Nate asked.
"No, I don't think so." Justin replied as both guy's walked down the sidewalk. "Besides, I've accepted that Drew isn't, and never will be gay"
"Well you should really tell him, I think he deserves to know."
Justin fell silent and kept walking, he wasn't angry, irritated, confused or sad; he was in deep thought. Deep down he knew Drew did have a right to know and really should be told, but at the same time he didn't want to say anything that could jeopardize their friendship. Drew wouldn't stop being friends just because of that; heck, it was barely a kiss.
"Did I say something wrong?" Nate inquired.
"No, you didn't say anything wrong. I was just thinking about Drew's reaction to the news that I kissed him while he was asleep that night"
"He'll be fine with it. I mean, yeah I've only know him a whole day and 50 minutes, but he doesn't seem like the type of guy to make a big ordeal about something like that."
"Yeah, I know. Its just one of those really stupid lingering thoughts, ya' know"
"I have them all the time," Nate groaned jokingly.
"...So you've never been with another guy before?" Justin said, changing the subject.
"No" Nate sighed.
"Then how do you know you're gay?" Justin prodded.
"Just a feeling, why?"
"I was just wondering" Justin replied.
Beth greeted Nate warmly as both guy's walked into the house, she gave them both a hug and drug Nate into the dinning room. Now the dinning room was all set up and nicely decorated, the table draped in a lace cloth, with the polished wooden chairs around it.
"Ok, to sum this up" Justin said following behind them, "You can call her Beth, she's a hippie mom who knows I'm gay and couldn't be prouder. She's also eccentric, but I think you gathered that. My father works long hours a lot of the time and also knows I'm gay, and he too is fine with it. Back to mom for a moment, she'll talk you ear off... I'll get the earplugs... just nod and smile and she wont even know"
"Justin! I am the exact opposite of that description!" Beth replied cracking a giant smile. "And I'm not a hippie!"
"Right... and I'm straight" Justin retorted with a sarcastic chuckle.
"...That would be the day..." Nate winked.
"Ok ok, enough of this! You, to my room!" Justin ordered pointing in the direction of the stairs, "...and you; get back to your hippie duties!" he finished, looking at his mother. Justin gave a smile as he walked towards his room with Nate following right behind him.
"So what do you want to do for our first date?" Nate asked as he shut the door to Justin's room quietly.
"I'm not really sure. How about we rent a few movies and watch them here. Mom and dad wont bother us, and you don't have to feel awkward cause it'll be private. No crowds, just us" Justin said as he set his things down by his computer.
Justin's room was now fully set up, it was a very organized room for a teenager with Justin's computer and TV to the right, when you entered the room, the bed to the right, a dresser right beside the window that overlooked a field, which was straight ahead of Nate, who was still standing at the door, and along the wall that the entrance was, was a large double door closet.
"Sounds fun" Nate chirped.
"Then it's settled. After we eat we can go get the movies from a near-by store and come back to watch them. And best part is its Friday! We have all weekend to do whatever we want"
"I'm allowed to stay all weekend?" Nate questioned.
"Of course... Mom would have a fit if you didn't!" Justin laughed as he laid down on the bed, his legs hanging over the edge.
Nate slowly worked his way over to the bed, setting his book bag down as he went and slid onto the bed beside Justin. Nate took his left arm and reached over to Justin, rubbing his abdomen softly and nuzzling in close. It wasn't often that Nate had been able to even speak of these feelings, and now he could just let them out, knowing Justin wouldn't mind. Thoughts that flowed freely through his mind would now reach someone else. ________________________________ So how was this chapter? Did you like it? Its not much longer then the rest of the Chapters, but it is slightly longer. And be proud, it only took me two days to write it all. Though that means I slacked off the rest of the week. haha. oh well.
-Darren