This chapter is going to cover a few things that will definitely make the story interesting. We could see a little turmoil, maybe some emotions running rampant. Just read and find out.
"The sound of a kiss is not so loud as that of a cannon, but its echo lasts a great deal longer." Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
The quote has some significance in this chapter. It isn't just random, so pay attention to it.
Last time on Chapter 3
"Justin we need to talk about something important." JC decided that was the best way to begin. If the others knew, he knew that Justin had to be informed too. He wasn't going to tell him that he loved him, just that he was gay, and maybe about the kiss with Jordan.
Justin didn't respond though, just continued to cry. JC knew just what to do and sat down on the bed. "Justin, this is going to be hard for you to hear, and it's hurt for me to say, so I'm just gonna say it...."
"I'm sorry Josh, I don't, it's just, I don't mean to cry over this." Justin stopped him before he could say it. JC didn't have the strength to interrupt the boy though, he could tell that Justin was deeply upset about something. "It's so stupid, and you are just gonna think I'm a little kid for acting this way, but you are so important to me. And all day, I just felt like I was second best to everyone today. I had to carry bags in, I was the last to be introduced to everyone, I had to stand in the living room, none of my friends came to see why I had left, and then you guys wouldn't even tell me what was going on in the living room. And my mom wouldn't make me lunch but she offered everyone else some, never mind. You just think I'm stupid, so go back downstairs, I'll deal with it."
"Oh, Justin, I don't think your stupid. You don't ever have to be afraid of telling me anything."
"No, I can deal with it. I'm just a baby crying over something stupid."
"Justin, listen, you are not second best to anyone in my life. You know that, I love you, you are my best friend."
"Not even if you were dating anyone?" Justin asked, wiping some of the tears out of his eyes.
"I'm not dating anyone, and even if I was dating some one, you would still be first in my life." JC smiled.
"I saw you and, you and that Jordan kid out on the porch. I saw you two kiss." Justin spoke again. "That's why I went downstairs, and then you guys didn't even acknowledge me. I thought you were going to tell me, or something, but you didn't."
"Justin, I didn't want you to see it like that. But I'm gay, but me and Jordan aren't dating. I've never dated anyone, it was just a kiss. A mistake at that."
"Why didn't you tell me you were gay? We've been best friends for like ever, I thought I was trustworthy." Justin was still crying, and as he mentioned the truth, the tears started to come again.
"You are Justin, it's just scary, it's scary being gay. Ya know, it's like you play this guy whose straight all the time, that you don't know how to finally be gay. I wanted to tell you guys, Mary wanted me to tell you." JC stopped after finishing, his eyes shot up, and he saw the hurt in Justin's eyes as it was mentioned that Mary knew and he didn't.
"You told her, she knows?" Justin asked in a peaceful manner, one that JC thought was a little too peaceful.
"I first met her over the internet, I never knew it would turn into a real friendship." JC couldn't really think of a good excuse though, he knew no matter what Justin was going to be upset with him for the situation.
"I don't care, you shouldn't have kept it from me if you told other people. At least I never told everyone I was gay, I kept it a secret, I didn't tell anyone. No family, no friends, no strangers over the internet, no one." Justin stood up and walked out of his bedroom into the bathroom slamming the door.
JC sat stunned in the bedroom, with one thought on his mind. Not that Justin was upset with him, not that he had fucked up big time by letting it on that Mary knew, but that Justin was gay too, and he had just come out to him.
"Mary!" JC went running down the steps towards the kitchen. "Mary, I need to talk to you outside." JC grabbed her by the arm quickly, and pulled her out the back door, shutting it just as she made it outside. He pushed her towards a chair by the side of the pool and sat down next to her. "Justin, he's gay."
"He's what?!?"
"He's gay, we were upstairs, talking. He was crying, he was upset about getting the shaft all day, and he told me he saw me kiss Jordan..."
"You and Jordan kissed?" Mary was a little far behind in the news.
"Yeah, he kissed me, but I told him I wasn't interested." JC dismissed it quickly. "Anyways, he got mad because I had never told him I was gay, and he started to cry again. So then I tried to explain that I never had the guts to tell him, and that you had always wanted me to tell him. And he freaked, he got upset that I had told you and not him. And he got really pissed, he started to scream, he said he had never told anyone he was gay."
"Go back and explain this more detailed, when did you and Jordan kiss?" Mary stopped him.
"He just leaned over, and we kissed. It was an accident, I didn't even want it to happen, but it did. And I don't know why, but it doesn't matter. Justin saw, Justin's gay, I have a chance now. Besides the fact that I totally fucked with his trust. I should have known better, I'm like his everything, he looks up to me and needs me like he would a father. That's because his father is a heartless bastard, he needed me to take his place."
"Josh, you're rambling." Mary started to laugh and JC broke into laughter too.
"I'm sorry, I'm just a little freaked out. I need to make this right with Justin. I need to let him know that I'm sorry, and that he is everything to me, but how do I do that?"
"You show him with this." Mary grabbed JC's hand and placed it on his chest. "Don't tell him anything, show him with everything you are Josh. You're romantic, kind and you love that kid, so show him that you do. I know that you'll figure out the perfect way."
The day finished off quickly, and as the evening sun began to set, dinner began at the Harless Residence. Justin ate in complete silence, while JC tried to register the afternoon, he however did not sit in silence. It wasn't his character.
"Lynn, there was something I kinda wanted to tell you. I told everyone else and since I'm living in your house I thought that you have the right to know as well." JC had decided it would best to come out to Lynn. Not only would he know how she would feel if he ever got Justin, but it would also be a sign for Justin, so that Justin could determine how his mother would react if he ever came out to her.
"What is it dear?" She asked JC sincerely.
"I'm gay."
"That's great, but it isn't much of a problem." Lynn smiled at him, and snickered. "I'm glad that you had enough guts to tell me. I know it was probably scary for you."
"Thanks Lynn, I'm glad you aren't upset about it. And I'd like it if everyone could, well ya know keep it secret. I know the guys will, but I mean, for our careers, it's just better that this doesn't leak or anything." JC started to speak with a business like tone, and everyone stopped him with their stares.
"Jace, dude, we aren't going to say anything." Joey smiled and the dinner resumed.
"Justin, would you clear the table?" Justin looked up at his mother, he was upset, he was angry, he was annoyed, he was nervous, and he certainly didn't want to do the dishes.
"No, I wouldn't like to clear the table." Justin replied, not even flickering his eyes off of his mother.
"Justin, clear the table!" Lynn got a little louder and more impatient.
"It's okay, I'll clear the table." JC jumped up and grabbed his stuff.
"No, sit down Joshua. Justin, these are our guests, please clear the table." Lynn repeated herself in a calm, but angered voice.
"I said I didn't want to clear the table. These are not my guests, they are Josh's and Lance's, so let them clear the table." Justin replied, his eyes still gazing intently at his mother, it was obvious he was waiting to be dismissed from the table.
"Justin, what is your problem? Get up and clear the table." Lynn was now yelling, and beyond mad. The table had become silent beside the arguing family members, as they all grew nervous and embarrassed by the situation.
"No." Justin replied, standing and walking out of the kitchen. Within twenty seconds that heard the front door open and slam shut.
"I don't know what the hell has gotten into that boy." Lynn smiled at everyone, hoping to change the mood. "I'll clear the table, why don't you all relax for a while." Lynn ushered them out of the kitchen, as she preceeded to clear the table.
JC smiled at everyone. "I think I'm gonna check on Justin." They all smiled at him, and watched him cautiously edge out the front door.
"Um, you wanna talk Curly?"
"Not to you, not to anyone in that fucking house."
JC was a little taken back by Justin's language. He barely heard the teenager swear, and now Justin had just said one of the worst swear words, and it was at his friends and family. But JC had expected it from the teenager today, after all that had happened, he could tell Justin was aching.
"Justin, please, I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"I don't care that you didn't tell me, I'm over that. I'm just pissed, pissed about all the shit that goes on in my life. I'm a fucking teen idol, the desire of millions of teen girls, and I can't get with one of them. I'm the poster boy for NSYNC, the quote unquote lead singer of us, and I'm not the talented one. I'm not the best looking one in the group, so why the fuck do they say I am? I'm not the best singer so why do they say I am? I don't get all the leads, so why am I the lead singer? And I don't fucking want to be the desire of a million girls, I want one desire, and I don't have a fucking chance with it." Justin was now sobbing into his hands. JC edged close to him and pulled him into a hug. He was shocked by the force that pushed him back. "Don't Josh, just don't. I don't want your fucking pity and sympathy on me, I don't want anyone to feel bad for me"
"Justin, what is with you? You are a damn good looking kid. You have a great voice, and you deserved to be eyed by millions of girls, and millions of guys if you want it. You deserve people to feel bad for you when you feel bad, because you bring down the whole room when you get upset. And you deserve whatever the hell you desire because you deserve the best in the world." JC pulled Justin in, and the harder Justin tried to fight it, he was only pulled in by the older band mate's stronger arms.
And by some chance, some fate, some destined moment, he lifted his head, and their eyes caught. A spark jumped through their arms, and down into the rest of their bodies. Slowly they both leaned in, JC tilting his head downward, Justin stretching up, until their lips met. Sweet at first, and then almost clinging for each other their tongues and lips fought with each other, nothing else around them mattered. All they could hear was the swishing of their tongues, and the beating of their hearts. All they could see was the darkness that shrouded their eyes, but the hidden light that shone through them to each other. All they could taste was what they had both been yearning for, and all they could feel were each other.
And it ended, JC pulled away to breathe, but held Justin tight. He didn't want Justin to get any ideas about him having second thoughts.
"I love you Justin."
"I love you too Josh." The tears stopped, the pout left that sweet angelic face, and he smiled. A real smile, a happy smile, and it caught on, because JC smiled back.
"Maybe we should go inside?" JC suggested.
"I don't want them to know." Justin quickly blurted out.
"They don't have to, we can tell them when you're ready." JC smiled.
"Um, will you, well, will you, uh, sleep with me in my bed tonight?" Justin asked shyly, and like a small child. JC smiled at him, shook his head, and helped him.
"Justin, I'll never sleep without you again."
TBC...
Okay, I thought this story was going to be long and last a long time. But I decided that it was just a short one. After four chapters, Justin and JC are finally together. And I don't know what else to write, so it's done. I liked it while it was here, but it's time is done.
Brown Eyes